JULY (SECOND) 2009 ● Rs 30

WOMAN ’S ERA

WHY COUPLES
ARE SHYING AWAY FROM
PARENTHOOD?
KEEPING
TREND WITH MOD
GADGETS: TIPS
DOES SEX GIVE
POSITIVE LIFE
FEEDBACK?
THE PLACE
WHICH HOUSES
MONUMENTAL
MARVELS
JULY (SECOND) 2009

WHAT COMPRISES
A SIZE ‘0’ BODY

THEGOODNESS
OF LEISURE TRAVEL

THE MAN
WHO MOBILISED
ENGLISH LANGUAGE
AND SENT IT INTO BATTLE
 JULY (SECOND) 2009
Vol 36, Issue No. 855
CONTENTS
BUILDS HAPPY HOMES
Founder: Vishwa Nath
(1917-2002)
womansera.com

78
BOMBAY
FILMDOM

7
DOUBLE INCOME, NO
14
GET AWAY, RECHARGE
HEALTH DIET FOOD
FOR THOUGHT
K. V. Venugopal

KIDS THE NEW MANTRA? AND CREATE MEMORIES!

Sudha Chandrasekaran Kasturi Rangachari

ARTICLES
LATEST GADGETS
FOR YOU
Anoop Verma

68 82
MOTHER-LOVE WHEN
ETERNAL ELLORA DOES IT FIRST STRIKE
Rajib Sen Kasturi Rangachari

71 MONSOON
NECESSITATES REMOVAL OF
MOULD FROM HOMES LOST YOUR LIBIDO?
NK Pant GET IT BACK
Vikas Kumar Jain
74 A LIFT IN THE HOUSE
K. M. Sharma

92 IN PURSUIT OF 88 COOKERY
EXCELLENCE LAC ORNAMENTS
Subhra ARE AGAIN 46 A VEG-NON-VEG MIX
BECOMING POPULAR 48 FOR YOUR TASTE BUDS
96 THIS IS THE WAY IT WAS Kusum Mehta
Mango Pickle
glass

LIKE!
re. Pour into

●
room temperatu the lid on the jar.
put
2 tsp of haldi
powder bottles and days.
powder - hing sun for 8-10
11/2 tsp of asafoetida – aniseed Keep in the even a year if care
1 kg tomatoes weighing around for
powder Stays good Take out
1 green mango 2 tsp of saunf keep it clean.
is taken to of mango at
one
powder
300 gm powder only a few pieces Put

Tamatar Chutney
1/ tsp of haldi
powder 2 tsp of amchur powder a clean spoon. sun

●
2 rlic paste chilli time using in the
3-4 tsp of ginger-ga 2 tsp of red and keep it
salt back the lid aachar is
paste
3 tsp of tamarind paste 5-6 tsp of time. This
from time to has a fine

Sonam Agrawal
chilli spicy but
2 tsp of green oil METHOD green mangoes not very saunf . Tastes
1 cup of mustard Choose raw ly raw and aroma of hing and
absolute
salt to taste which are to ripen even
a
good with patties.

with Green Mangoes

have not started and dark green
METHOD Cut into Choose hard
the tomatoes . of little. well and
Wash . Wash these
CHILLIES AND
eyes
remove the into mangoes quarter-i nch pieces.
halves and and then cut cut into haldi powder
GINGER IN
the tomatoes all the seeds. Sprinkle salt and
Remove steel
time. quarters. the in a clean
It is pickling ity Mango pickle
Peel the
mango, removesmall and keep
cut into very in a container . Cover
with a muslin
VINEGAR
to

Mango Pickle with

kernel and the mangoes

●
Put creativ pieces. Run
these pieces cloth and allow or even at room ENTS:
s a paste. in the sun so that INGREDI green
into your pickle
FOR YOUR
mixture to obtainquantity of the oil dry ure for 2 days is 200 gm
of very small
Heat half the rlic temperat Thai chillies

TASTE BUDS
the moisture chillies called cut into julienne
and enjoy these in a kadhai.
Add the ginger-gaMix most of
for a minute. d. a 1 cup of
ginger
throughout paste and stir-fry
pieces and
add salt evaporate the hing to obtain
Crush the saunf
pieces

Asafoetida
in the tomato with a lid and cook

FICTION
Also dry-grind
the year. to taste. Cover of the powder.
heat till most have to obtain a powder. of the Chillies
and ginger
in vinegar

one time on medium the quantity hing

By Roma Ghosh pieces of
mango at moisture from
the tomatoes
mango
Heat half add the
Put back the Mix in the oil and for
green mangoes using a clean spoon. evaporat ed. for 2 mustard to splutter
Choose raw raw and keep it in
the sun from stage. Stir-fry chilli powder and allow add the saunf
absolute ly a lid and aachar goes paste at this Now,
which are mix in the green more 30 seconds. for
MANGO
to ripen even to time. This e minutes and to splutter

Chillies and Ginger in

and allow
have not started and dark green time with pulao or vegetabl and

●
powder mango
hard well paste and haldi and cooking on powder Mix in the
PICKLE
little. Choose well and salt. Keep
stirring 30 seconds. gently. Put off the
Wash these biryani. another 3-4
minutes, stir
mangoes. nch pieces. low fire for a time at
pieces and spices.
INGREDIENTS: mangoes cut into quarter-ihaldi powder oil a little at mix in the remaining
and adding the oil has heat, heat the remaining
1 kg of raw
green
Sprinkle salt steel Once all the another pan the
short intervals. and the aachar is In
in a clean
TAMATAR and pour over
oil
1 litre of mustard and keep with a muslin been used
up mustard oil
powder the heat. mango pieces. or
Cover dry, put off

Vinegar
2 tsp of haldi container .
CHUTNEY N 4 cups of vinegar
to
a powder – the mangoes more or less Put into spiced to cool to
1/ tsp of asafoetid cloth and allow or even at room temperature. for Allow enough to
Cool to room
WITH GREE
2
hing dry in the
sun
so that aachar is ready with cover the
for 2 days bottles. The 2 weeks Mango pickle
5-6 tsp of salt temperat ure stay good for chillies and
MANGOES
is
powder: the moisture use and will in the fridge.
asafoetida
For the spice most of without keeping ginger
powder – aniseed evaporated. of the kachories or
pakoras.
2 tsp of salt
2 tsp of saunf the quantity hing INGREDIENTS: Serve with
Heat half

Chillies with Jaggery

and add the

●
powder METHOD
powder
2 tsp of amchur chillies mustard oil for stems only
allow to splutter Remove the
red powder and
MANGO
mango leave
20-25 dried seeds Mix in the and
jeera – onion 30 seconds. gently. Put off the from the chillies ginger and
1 tsp of kala

26 A WOMAN LIKE NANDITA

Peel the
PICKLE WITH
1/ tsp of methi
seeds – pieces and
stir Mix these whole. Wash
2 the spice powder. the julienne pieces.
heat, mix in cut into thin
ASAFOETIDA
fenugreek pan heat all the moisture.
well. In another oil and pour well and pat-dry and chillies into a

Corn and Crushed

2 cloves

●
seeds mustard Place the gingerthe vinegar and 1
2 tsp of mustard remaining mango pieces.
over the spiced room INGREDIENTS: glass jar. Pour
METHOD could cool to 1 kg of raw
green
is spicy. You Allow to bottles 47
This aachar red chillies Put into glass
amount of temperature. on the jar. Keep in mangoes oil
reduce the firy. put the lid 1 litre of mustard (Second) 2009
if you want
it less ts for and Stays good Tamatar chutney
with
Woman’s Era
● July
the ingredien 8-10 days.
Dry-roast all the sun for is taken to green mangoes

Kasturi Rangachari
Cool to room for even a year if care only a few

Chillies
the spice powder. and grind to
a
it clean. Take out
keep
tempera ture aside.
mixer. Keep
powder in a July (Second)
2009
●
Woman’s Era
46

● Green Chillies with

38 THE PECULIAR MAN
Leena Raj
A QUESTION OF PURITY
Gayatri T Rao
Mustard and Mint ● Jackfruit Pickle
● Amra Pickle ● Mixed Pickle
● Black Jamuns Stewed ● Lotus Stem Pickle
CHURICHILL’S WIT ● Stewed Fresh Cherries ● Bitter Gourd Stuffed
Smita Shenoy ● Mango Pickle with Pickle
Jaggery ● Chole Pickle
 22
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 EDITORIAL
HOMOSEXUALITY COMMOTION
I
t is believed that Adam and Eve were living happily
in the Garden of Eden until Adam, prompted by the
Serpent, took a bite from the forbidden apple. And
thus began sexual relationship between them marking
the commencement of sexual reproduction among
human race.
But no one knows when and how sexual relations
between the members of same sex began. It is,
however, certain that homosexuality and lesbianism
are as old as the human civilisation. And the gays and
lesbians, as the men and women having carnal
relations are known respectively, had never taken a
bite from any forbidden apple. But as a social
perversion, the phenomenon existed since time
immemorial. No one is sure what made the British
rulers to bring a law (Section 377 of IPC) against
homosexuality in circa 1860, that is,
during the period when the British-
Indian forces were on an annexation
drive.
Perhaps they might have seen
that the soldiers, who were long
away from their homes and families,
were making relations with one
another. So they (the British)
enacted Section 377 of IPC making
homosexuality a cognisable crime.
In independent India, Section 377 of IPC was
retained in our Constitution as it is and homosexuality
continued to be treated as an outlawed behaviour if
not as a crime. But there is hardly any incidence, when
any person, man or woman, has been punished for
having homosexual relations.
Recent ruling of Justices A.P. Shah and S.
Muralidharan of Delhi High Court in favour of
homosexuality puts a big question mark on the validity
of the said law. The justices have observed that this
Section violates the fundamental right to freedom and
equality of an individual granted to him or her under the
various sections and sub-sections of our Constitution.
Meanwhile, the ruling that has come at a juncture
when a debate was about to start in Parliament over
the issue has sent a wave of cheer among the gays
and lesbians. At the same time, it has shocked various
sections of society. Although, many nations, including
the USA, the UK, and many western European and
Southeast Asian countries have now granted
homosexuality a legal status, but it has not done any
good to the respective societies. On the contrary, it
has emboldened the sexually perverted men and
women to observe and celebrate a number of awkward
6 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
events like gay day and lesbian day, etc. Their actions
seem to be directed at making mockery of the social
norms including the pious institution of marriage.
Proponents of the gay rights hail Delhi High Court’s
ruling declaring it a victory of their prolonged struggle.
They argue that why should India still cling to the British
period law while even our old masters have already
scrapped it in England according homosexuality social
as well as legal acceptance. Our Parliament is exactly
going to discuss this point. In the light of this, Delhi
High Court’s ruling has come somewhat in haste. Its
motive is also rather obscure.
Now something about the social implications of
homosexuality. Without doubt, it is an outcome of
perverted minds. The phenomenon perhaps is an
outcome of too many taboos put on boys and girls in a
society. Psychologists maintain that homosexual
behaviour takes its roots during the childhood years.
Earlier, it is out of curiosity. But with
time, it is corrected by itself. But if it
continues among the adults then it is
nothing but perversion. Sometimes,
it arises out of frustration among
adult men and women.
But it is by no means an excuse
to seek social and legal acceptance
for this perversion. There are many
other creative ways to give vent to
this frustration. Homos and lesbians
must explore them. The society too ought to take a look
at various taboos inflicting growing minds of young
children and make sure that they grow with healthy
sexual outlook without facing any sexual risk.
Moreover, at least male and female union is required
for the continuation of progeny. Any diversion from this
natural requirement would lead to social disorder. Even
the sexually reproducing animals don’t indulge in such
perversion as homosexuality. Therefore, homosexuality
and lesbianism have no room in the society because
their acts are against the natural laws though they talk
about the human rights.
In such a situation, sex education becomes all the
more important. It is high time to start a fresh debate
about including it in school curriculum.
Further, it must be asked if by legalising
homosexuality will it lead to decline in sexual crimes
against women and minor girls. No such decline is seen
in societies where homosexuality is legalised. So what
purpose would it serve in India to legalise
homosexuality? Perhaps nothing except some groups
of gays and lesbians holding rallies, displaying placards
and rejoicing over their so-called victory.
write to: letters@womansera.com We
 re you a successful couple

In today’s high-pressure lifestyle,
does having children have a place?
By Sudha Chandrasekaran
A
with steadily rising bank
balance? Are you one of
those pairs who love to
take off to a late-night
movie without having worry
about kids? Do you get
jitters when you think of
having kids and prefer this
life instead? Then you are
one of those, leading a DINK lifestyle.
This acronym appeared for the first
time in Pat Buchanan’s best-selling
book The Death of the West. Short
for “Double Income, No Kids,” it
refers to thousands of couples in
urban centres leading such a

DOUBLE INCOME,
lifestyle. It is a growing phenomenon.
Society is facing a culture shock
these days. Earlier, a couple was

?
expected to have a baby within

NO KIDS
almost a year of marriage. These
days, with higher pay packets and
both husband and wife working,
success is coming easily and they
can afford a pretty lavish lifestyle.

THE NEW MANTRA They get so used to leading an easy

life that they forget the joy that
children bring. Though a DINK
lifestyle is enjoyable, it is not so
forever. After a point, you will start
feeling shallow yourself and would
want something more than just
money and comfort.
 More and more young married
couples are hitting the pay dirt,
thanks to double incomes. But their
deepening pockets do not mean a
fuller familial life, as they aren’t
blinking before going the DINK way.
DINK couples have found alternative
pleasures to procreation. They are
impulsive shoppers, eat out
frequently and take dream vacations.
This, they say, gives more joy than
a child would. Daring to go against
the tide, defying accepted modes of
tradition, they have chosen their
passions, be it travel, music, dance
or cooking. Children, they feel, are a
hindrance in their path.
“We believe that parenting is like a
career. I don’t believe in multi-tasking
of any kind when it comes to children.
If I have a child, I would want to stay
at home, enjoy his or her growing up
and contribute to the child’s
character. At this stage of my life,
neither my husband nor I are ready to
do that,” says Preethi. Rahul and
Preethi hope to retire from their
respective jobs by the time they turn
45 and invest their time and money in
travelling the world together with
backpacks. Rakhee and Nikhil say
they’re dedicated to their passion —
dance — and they trot across the
globe giving performances. “Dance
— that’s our baby. We’re exploring
our creative passion and I don’t think
anything satisfies us more than this.
We’re attached to each other, we’re
like two bodies and one soul and do
not see the need for an another
person,” says Rakhee.
TREND GROWING
DINK is a growing trend in every
metropolis, thinks Dr Kamini Rao,
founder of Bangalore Conception
Assisted Centre. From one child it’s
heading to a no-child scenario. Even
women have no issues pooh-poohing
the concept of having children and
motherhood. “Economic indepen -
dence, greed and odd timings are
prime reason for DINK. Which IT
couple will want to be tied down with
a child and family given their every
second’s worth? They would rather
retire with a good bank balance and
10
live the rest of their lives hassle-free,”
observes Dr Rao. Also, the fear of THE FEAR OF TAKING
taking on the huge responsibility of
bringing up kids which involves a lot ON THE HUGE
of sacrifice, patience and RESPONSIBILITY OF
adjustments looms large in the minds
of DINK. BRINGING UP
Time rather than money is a KIDS WHICH
constraint for these couples when it
comes to planning for a long holiday. INVOLVES
They try to squeeze in a couple of A LOT OF SACRIFICE,
short breaks each year. Rajath and
Shailaja have just returned from their
PATIENCE AND
UK trip, which cost them about Rs ADJUSTMENTS LOOMS
two lakh. “We have my sister there,
so our expenses were much less,”
LARGE IN THE
says Rajath. MINDS OF DINK.
CONSUMPTION
PATTERNS
Couples enjoy a fairly long holiday
once in a year or once in every two
years. They spend around Rs 15,000
on each of the short trips. “A major
part of our expenses goes towards
buying souvenirs or small gifts for
relatives and friends. For instance,
we picked up tea bags and
eucalyptus oil from Ooty, and home-
made chocolates from Kodaikanal,
during our vacation there last year,”
add the Guptas.
Consumption patterns in metros
have undergone metamorphic
changes in the last five years from
education, health and basic
essentials to entertainment, fitness
centre, eating out and personal care
etc, due to the rise in the disposable
income of individuals, availability of
credit and increasing number of dual-
income nuclear families. In a survey
done by the Associated Chamber of
Commerce and Industry of India
(ASSOCHAM) on Changing
Consumption Pattern of a city like
Delhi, as a result of rising income
levels, nearly 75 per cent couples
falling in the DINK category with
about Rs 6-8 lakh income per annum,
roughly spend Rs 15,000-20,000 on
entertainment, shopping, fitness
centres, eating out and branded wear
articles, almost every month. 45 per
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
 to eat out rather than return home Amrit’s include a home-theatre
MOST ADULTS and cook. system, iPod and laptop among other
RECEIVED LOVE For most DINK couples, shopping things.
is a weekly affair whether it’s for the All the couples agree that the
AND CARE FROM essentials or otherwise. While absence of kids in their lives gives
THEIR PARENTS. Namrata is an impulsive buyer — “If I them room to splurge. “This is a
set my heart on something, I need to period in our lives where we are
I THINK IT IS get it then and there” — Sundaresan making the best of our reasonable
RATHER SELFISH IF has more control over himself. “He financial freedom as well as lack of
splurges too, but after giving it a the responsibility of rearing children.
THEY DO NOT thought, unlike me,” says Namrata. When we were married four years
THEN BEAR They spend mostly on clothes, ago, neither of us had the resources
accessories and occasionally on to spend impulsively, so we are
CHILDREN AND electronic gadgets. making up for it with a vengeance
PAY OUT THE SAME now,” says Vandana.
LOVE AND CARE BALANCING ACT Why do more and more couples
choose not to have children? Several
THEIR PARENTS Amrit, an impulsive shopper, says older generation people think that it is
GAVE THEM. his wife, Akila, “knows the fine
balance between spending and
to have more freedom. They regard
this as an irresponsible choice. “I
cent of other DINK couples who do splurging, and makes sure she has know they have free choice, but if
not have any budget but use a saved for a rainy day.” They always every family does not bear children,
substantial part of their income for have a friendly fight over what has the human race would become
loan repayment like EMIs add up to been bought and how to put it to extinct,” argued Mangesh, a retired
over Rs 20,000 a month for good use. Akila’s impulses are limited middle schoolteacher. “Most adults
mortgages, and spend about Rs to trinkets and cosmetics, while received love and care from their
5,000-10,000 on non-essential items. parents. I think it is rather selfish if
The ASSOCHAM finding stated that they do not then bear children and
all the working couples with no kids pay out the same love and care
appear to have one expense in their parents gave them.”
common — i.e. eating out. The
reason is that with the tough However, couples have their
schedules and late work hours that own reasons for having DINK
their jobs demand, couples, families
especially those who are into MNCs, Says Nanditha, a woman in her
computer professionals, sales and late 20s, married for nearly five
marketing et al, feel that it is practical years now, “Life for my husband
and me is easy and romantic. If we
had a child it would spoil
everything. We enjoy travelling,
taking photos, reading books,
exercising and enjoying all the
delicious foods — so having a baby
is not in our plans. Life is short, we’d
like to use all our money and time to
enjoy life itself.”
But not all DINK families have
such hedonistic attitudes. The
Banerjees, who live in Delhi and have
been married for three years, also
believe that a child might ruin their
marital harmony, but in a different
way. “My wife and I often overhear
our neighbours quarreling with each
other on issues related to the
upbringing of their only daughter.
Therefore, we worry that, if we had
a child, the same thing would

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 11

happen. The idea of day care does
not appeal to us because of the
horrible stories we hear about the
caregivers’ treatment of the children
there and we believe in bringing up
the child ourselves rather than by any
other person.” Many women worry
about the course of gestation and
giving birth. “It must be painful,” said
Leena, a young college lecturer,
“though medicine has developed
greatly. I know women still die during
childbirth. Besides, giving birth will
damage a woman’s figure.”
Pressures and competition at work
are other factors. Shahnaz, a
government official has been married
for four years to a company manager.
She said that she loved children very
much, but that she and her husband
were so busy that they were unable to
take the idea into consideration.
“Also, the competition in our company
is intense. If I have a child and leave
my position temporarily, someone
else is sure to take my place.”
Many couples also worry that they
cannot afford to have a child.
Besides, books, clothes and toys,
children are becoming more and
more expensive. Seeing other
children possessing those luxuries,
children of parents who cannot afford
them, might tend to develop an
inferiority complex and might even
resent their parents. The difficulties
of life, and the troubles all children
12
must face, also scare many couples.
Every year they see college
graduates fighting so hard to land a
job. In the future, this kind of
competition will only get tougher.
They feel that they have had enough
of all this and do not want to bring a
life into the world just for the baby to
suffer like they did. And there again
are some couples who do not have
enough confidence in their marriage.
RIGHT OF CHOICE
“I do not believe in romantic love
and pledges,” says a software
engineer in TCS, Chennai. “If I
divorced my husband, the child would
be hurt. We do not have the right to
heap our faults on an innocent child.”
However, the cost of freedom for
DINK families is another set of
pressures and worries. Many think
that the DINK idea is bad for the
stability of a marriage. “I was married
for six years, but it all came to
nothing in the end,” said Rekha. “I
used to think that marriage without a
child was free and easy, but I never
thought that it would lead my
marriage into a tomb.”
At the beginning, after getting
married, Rekha was afraid that
having a baby would change her
figure and bring a premature end to
her sweet married life, so having a
child was put off. Her mother-in-law
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
THEY FEEL THAT THEY
HAVE HAD ENOUGH
OF ALL THIS AND DO
NOT WANT TO BRING
A LIFE INTO THE
WORLD JUST FOR THE
BABY TO SUFFER LIKE
THEY DID. AND THERE
AGAIN ARE SOME
COUPLES WHO DO
NOT HAVE ENOUGH
CONFIDENCE IN
THEIR MARRIAGE.
was unhappy about it. Rekha
conceived twice by accident but both
times, the couple decided on an
abortion. Time passed and eventually
the couple decided they were ready
to have a child. However, the medical
examination found that the two
abortions had damaged Rekha’s
reproductive system, and there was
no hope of a pregnancy. Her
husband and her mother-in-law could
not accept it and blamed her for her
selfishness. The quarrel in the family
went on and Rekha’s husband
divorced her in the end.
In real life, many families without
love are saved by their children.
Though a child cannot guarantee a
stable marriage, families without
children face more serious tests.
Despite the fact that DINK couples
face troubles and social pressure,
these couples are getting more
understanding from society these
days. “Perhaps who choose not to
have children pay more attention to
present happiness. They cherish their
relationship with their spouses more
than parenthood.
Many think that DINK couples are
not responsible or kind-hearted, but I
do not think so,” says Professor Mathur,
a leading sociologist. “Everyone has
the right to choose their way of life.
Others may not agree with their
choices, but the right of choice
should be respected. A civilised and
mature society should tolerate and
understand diversification.” We
 ven a couple of decades
E
ago, Indians weren’t much
into leisure travelling. Poor
transport and communication
facilities, discomfort with new
and strange surroundings,
uneasiness with unfamiliar
cuisines, guilt arising from
the conviction that trips,
unless essential, were self-
indulgent and that the money spent
on them was better saved – these
and a host of other reasons kept
Indians at home. But all that has
changed, and today Indians, old and
young,are all too ready to pack their
bags and take off the minute they
have the time and the money!
GET AWAY,
RECHARGE
AND CREATE
MEMORIES! Why leisure travel is
good for you. By Kasturi Rangachari
And why has this change in
thinking taken place? For many
reasons. Economic reforms have
opened up the country and let the
world in – and Indians out. Foreign
exchange restrictions have been
eased, liberalisation has created a
new and large class of entrepreneurs
and lots of people have lots of
money. And so leisure travel has
taken off!
Everyone can travel: Today most
people love to travel – and not just
the young, adventurous and restless.
Practically everyone has realised the
advantages of travelling – of getting
away from it all, of taking a break, of

TOUR OPERATORS
OFTEN KEEP THEIR
AGE IN MIND WHEN
PLANNING TRIPS FOR
SENIOR CITIZENS. BUT
NOT ALL THEIR
CLIENTS LIKE BEING
TOLD THAT THEY ARE
TOO OLD
TO DO IT ALL!
disconnecting and taking time off to
smell the roses along the path of life.
In fact, leisure travel has become part
of the routine lifestyle of many
people. And all of them benefit from
it.
Leisure travel is the greatest
stress buster possible. Yes, even just
a two-day weekend away from a
hectic work schedule (and who
doesn’t have one now, even if one is
a stay-at-home “unemployed” mum?)
is refreshing and revitalising. Today’s
jobs are high-pressure, stressful ones
and getting away for a complete
change has become a psychological
necessity.
If you spend a weekend at home,
you tend to brood about work
problems and even if you don’t, you
sleep or eat too much as you try to
get the energy to tackle postponed
chores or to play with the kids. You
then start the next week feeling stale,
exhausted and low-spirited.
But if you leave home and take off
for some getaway –- without taking
your laptop with you! – everything
changes. You find yourself in a
refreshingly unfamiliar place with new
things to see and do. The very air,
the ambience itself, is different. You
cannot follow your usual routine, and
have to think out what you want to
do, see, eat, etc.
And you have choices. You can
decide to lie in the open in a lounger
staring up at the sky, to go trekking,
to teach your five-year-old swimming
– your time, the commodity that is in
such short supply these days – is
your own to spend as you like! And if
you decide just to eat and sleep, for
some reason, this doesn’t make you
feel heavy and drugged – it refreshes
you!
Experience the change: And – boy
– do you enjoy being in control even
if it is only for a couple of days! Your
batteries get recharged and you
come back full of energy and vitality.
It has even been proved that regular
breaks prevent early burnout in
taxing jobs.
A getaway also gives you the
perfect opportunity to disconnect
from your regular life. And when you
do this, you get a new perspective on
things.
An ex-student of mine told me that
he had decided to give up his
excellent job in Switzerland, move
back to India and start a micro-
banking organisation while on a
much-needed holiday. “I suddenly
realised that I did not want to spend
my life as I was spending it – moving
from country to country, earning pots
of money but being away from my
aging parents. No, I wanted to come
back to India and do something that
would make a difference to people,”
he told me.
Tour operators often keep their
age in mind when planning trips for
senior citizens. But not all their clients
like being told that they are too old
to do it all! I remember my mother
speaking to a tour planner who had
told her that she would have just one
outing a day while in Bali.
“We don’t want to overdo things
now, do we?” he asked coyly with a
benign smile.
My mother glared at him. “You
may not want to, but put everything
back into my programme!” she
ordered tartly. “I’m not going to Bali to
count the clouds! I want to see it all,
do it all!”
My mother, unfortunately like too
few oldies, was determined to do
everything that she had always
wanted to while she could still do it.
So, till illness made it impossible, she
took off once a year, with two like-
minded friends, for regions unknown.
The threesome would go with a tour
company which specialised in
organising tours for pensioners. She
frequently told me that she was
grateful for the fact that I never told
her that she was too old to go off like
that and that I would worry myself to
death if she did so.
But how could I do anything other
than check out her tour thoroughly,
make sure that I had the phone
number and address of every hotel
that she’d be staying in and get her
international phone cards for the
countries she would be travelling to,
when she came back each time
looking exhilarated and happy and 10
years younger?
Broadening out: Travelling gives
one tremendous opportunities for
novelty, fun, adventure and
discovery. In fact, one cannot be a
complete human being who has a full
life unless one has travelled and
seen the world. Travelling completes
one’s education and this was why, in
the past, British aristocrats sent their
children for the “Grand Tour” after
they completed their studies. This

16 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

was mainly a tour of the cultural
centres of Europe.
Today too, youngsters in the
developed world often take a gap
year and either backpack their way
through countries that interest them,
join the Peace Corps or an NGO in a
third world country to work in an area
they consider interesting and
important or do something else that’s
not similar. The reason why they do
this is that they want to experience a
different kind of life to the one that
they grew up leading.
Travelling to a previously unknown
region or country helps you
understand people who are different
from you. You see their way of life
and their culture first hand. You learn
a little about their history, their
architecture, their arts and crafts,
their cuisine and other aspects of
their life. You appreciate the
similarities and differences between
you and them.
18
All this widens your mind. A very
conservative home-bird cousin of
mine who had hardly ever travelled
outside her home state of Tamil Nadu
was, a couple of years ago, forced
by circumstances to go to Rajkot in
Gujarat to see her sister-in-law
through the last stages of a
troublesome pregnancy.
My cousin went, dreading the two
months which she would have to
spend there. But when I met her after
her return, she talked non-stop about
the wonderful friends she had made
in Rajkot, the wonders of Gujarati
cuisine, Gujarati customs and their
similarity to Tamil customs and the
like.
That single visit had opened her
mind and made her realise that
different didn’t mean frightening or
unacceptable. It had made her ready
to embrace change.
Perhaps she then understood
what Hellen Keller meant when she
said, “Life is either a daring
adventure or nothing.” Or Mark
Twain’s words, “Twenty years from
now, you will be more disappointed
by the things you didn’t do than by
the things you did do.”
Travel increases our knowledge
and widens our perspectives. For
instance, I knew that medieval Italy
had witnessed the Renaissance, but
it took a trip to Rome and Florence
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
for me – not at all the artistic sort –-
to understand what that actually
meant.
As I stared dazed at the ceiling of
the Sistine Chapel, as I wandered
through the Uffizi Gallery and gazed
at the works of Da Vinci, Donatello,
Titian (and understood why bright
golden auburn hair was called titian!),
Botticelli, Raphael and many other
artists, as I was rendered speechless
by Michelangelo’s David in the
Galleria del Academia, I began to
vaguely comprehend what art was all
about and also developed a good
deal of respect for a civilisation that
produced such stupendous art.
I also began to think seriously
about how we Indians should do a
better job of preserving our own
cultural legacy. When I came back, I
took an online course in art
appreciation and began to contribute
to organisations involved in
preserving our cultural heritage.
Travel had opened my eyes and
made my mind grow. As Miriam
Beard wrote, “Travel is more than the
seeing of sights; it is a change that is
made, deep and permanent, on a
person’s ideas of living.”
Travel options: Today there are
organisations that can customise a
tour for you. A friend of mine actually
wanted to study Tuscan cuisine and
got a trip tailor-made for her. She
then went to Tuscany where she
interacted, first, with a woman who
had specialised in traditional Tuscan
cuisine and taught it in a catering
college, and then moved through the
region meeting housewives, chefs,
etc. She didn’t open a restaurant
serving Tuscan cuisine when she
returned to Mumbai, but she did
serve it to friends at home! More
important, she had done something
she had wanted to do for a long time
and enjoyed herself immensely while
doing it.
Another young couple I knew
wanted to find another couple
interested in touring Europe for two
months on the Eurostar train, on a
shoestring budget. They found such
a couple on the Internet and then the
four of them had a memorable

holiday. They bought some sort of
season ticket for the train and
hopped on and off it whenever a town
they were passing seemed
interesting.
They knew Europe backwards by
the time they got back! Not only that,
they had done something unusual
and adventurous that not many
people do and this gave them a great
deal of self-confidence. And since the
couple they had travelled with was
from Thailand, they learnt a lot about
that country, its cuisine, its customs
and practices and its language.
INDIA’S WONDERS
But one needn’t go abroad to
learn things or see them in a new
light. Our country is so diverse that
we can learn an immense amount by
travelling within it. A neighbour of
mine decided to go on a tour of
Karnataka with his son after the boy
had finished his tenth standard
Boards. They had the time of their
lives and when they came back the
boy remarked thoughtfully,
“Kannadigas are so great. It’s a pity
that we Tamilians fight so much with
them over water.”
That boy was definitely looking at
the ongoing problem Tamil Nadu has
over sharing the water of the Kaveri
with Karnataka, in a new and
more mature way. This
understanding of others, this
ability to see things from a
new perspective, is, I feel,
the greatest benefit of leisure
travel.
We all find the strange
and unfamiliar, threatening
and scary and we tend to
avoid it. People with skin of a
different colour, with features distinct
from ours, who perhaps talk the
same language, but do so with a an
accent so unfamiliar that we can
barely understand them, are all
strange and even frightening and we
often don’t know how to interact with
them and so often avoid them.
And in the same way we are
avoided by them. I have experienced
this several times during trips abroad
when my husband and I have been
the only Indians in the group and the
others have all been white
Westerners. Everyone smiled politely
at us, but left us severely alone.
Perhaps they thought that we
couldn’t understand English. Perhaps
they couldn’t get beyond the
prominent red bindi on my forehead
and see me as a person.
But things invariably changed as
soon as we struck up a conversation
and made it clear that not only did we
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
ALL HUMAN BEINGS
ARE THE SAME UNDER
THE SKIN. ALL HUMAN
BEINGS LAUGH
AND CRY AT THE
SAME THINGS, WE ALL
WANT THE SAME
THINGS FROM LIFE.
both know English, but that we were
interested in and could talk about the
same topics as they. Suddenly, we
were part of the group and were
included in the conversation, the
jokes and the camaraderie.
And when you talk, joke and share
experiences with others, you realise
one important thing. All human
beings are the same under the skin.
All human beings laugh and cry at
the same things, we all want the
same things from life, relationships
are important to all of us, we all
search for love and approval and the
same things hurt us. And once you
see people as exactly like you, you
understand them and understanding
is the first step to striking up
friendships or, going into more
serious territory, even to resolving
disagreements.
Plan ahead: Don’t make excuses.
19
Don’t, for instance, say that you’ll
travel when the children are older.
Who knows whether you’ll be able to
then? So, just plan a trip around your
kids and get started. Plan Disneyland
and nature trails instead of the
Louvre and archaeological sites!
You should grab the moment
because it hasn’t been so cheap to
travel for a long time. Low oil prices
mean low air fares and the recession
means that tour companies, airlines
and hotels are all fighting for your
custom.
Within the given parameters, plan
a trip of the type and duration that is
right for you. Are you a culture vulture
or the water sports sort? Do you want
the regular package tour or one that
takes you off the beaten track? A
two-day cruise or a trip around the
world? Do you want to travel with a
pack or independently? As for cost,
you can spend different amounts on
the same trip. So plan according to
your budget. Cheap dormitories or
five-star luxury? First class or budget
airlines? There are an enormous
variety of options and anything and
everything is possible!
Once you’ve settled on the details
of your trip, start doing your
homework. You will enjoy the things
and places you see more, if you
know something about them. So surf
the Internet. Blogs too will get you a
lot of pointers from people who have
done the same type of tour.
Definitely get yourself medical
20
insurance when you book your tour.
Many countries have made it
compulsory and you can’t get a visa if
you don’t have it. But it’s worth
getting it even if it is not compulsory.
Heaven forbid you fall ill on your trip,
you will certainly need it. But read the
fine print on the policy document to
make sure that it covers most
eventualities.
Pack sensibly. It is better that you
travel as light as possible. Porters are
often not available or they cost a lot
and most of the time, you will have to
carry your own stuff. Go to the
Internet and you will find websites
that tell you what you need to pack
and what you don’t need to. But don’t
plan to buy necessities at your
destination. You will find it difficult to
get things at a reasonable price on
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
the tourist circuit and may also have
problems getting the locals to
understand your needs.
I remember that my husband
decided not to take razors with him
when we went to China, but found
the free razors provided in our hotel
rooms too light to use and wanted
sturdier ones. We then spent all our
free time searching shops and trying
to get shop assistants to understand
what we needed! It took us a long
time to realise that as Chinese men
have light beards and therefore need
less sharp razors, only that type is
available in most Chinese shops!
A useful quotation from Susan
Heller: “ When preparing to travel, lay
out all your clothes and all your
money. Then take half your clothes
and twice the money.”
Hotel rooms sometimes have
small packets of detergent in the
bathrooms, but it is better to take
some with you – or a cake of washing
soap if you prefer that. Hotels charge
a bomb to wash clothes, so plan to
wash at least your lighter clothes and
your undergarments yourself. But do
this only when you are staying more
than a day at a place or you may be
left with wet clothes to pack. So take
the plunge! Take time off and
experience what life has to offer. Don’t
postpone it or decide to wait. There
may not be a better time or lower
prices. Venture forth and live life life-
size! You’ll come back and start
planning your next trip right away! We
 Lenovo products launched

A model poses
with newly
unveiled Lenovo
products in New
How Napoleon died Delhi. Lenovo
launched several
new products
including a single-
unit desktop PC,
Lenovo (300 and
ultra-thin
notebooks Lenovo
S10-2 with a
starting price range
of Rs 22,490.

Kidney specialist Danish doctor Arne Soerensen

(L) and his wife Birte are seen at their
home in the northern Danish city of Aalborg. The
doctor has written a book ‘Napoleon’s kidneys’
revealing that Napoleon died of a kidney
infection and not of poisoning.

The “Gorch Fock” training tall ship of the German Navy

takes part in tall ship parade at the Kiel Week sailing event
at the port of Kiel, northern Germany. Centre of violin production
A worker whittles
wood to make a
Tall Ship Parade

violin at a musical
instrument factory in
Pinggu, on the
outskirts of Beijing.
The district has
become one of the
world’s centres of
violin production in
just 20 years.

22 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 An artist draws a portrait of pop star Michael Jackson in the
street of Medellin, Colombia. A Malaysian fan writes a
message in tribute to Jackson on a white board during a vigil
organised to remember the pop legend in Kuala Lumpur.
Jackson’s death has sent shockwaves across the world.
Tribute to Michael Jackson

Brazilian computing
An intelligent robot

engineering student makes

some adjustments to an
intelligent robot invented to
play football, ahead of the
2009 RoboCup FEI
engineering university in Sao
Bernardo do campo in Brazil.
Some 400 robot teams
originating from 40 countries
are competing in the RoboCup
in Austria.

Green principles
Madonna’s nude images

A view of Spanish vintner Josep Maria Albet i

Noya’s vineyard and processing plant in Sant Pau
d’Ordal near Barcelona. As a vegetarian and an
environmentalist, Josep decided in the late 1970s
that going organic matched his green principles.
A television cameraman films nude images of US
musician Madonna displayed in a gallery in Central
London. Madonna posed for the black and whites at
the age of 20 when she was modelling in New York
to pay her way through dancing school.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 23

 QA &
Q&
I had a patch of pink skin at the
base of my neck at the back. The
doctor said it was Leucoderma. He
was able to stop its spread but he
also forbade me from going out in
sun. Will it get worse if I am in the
sun?
Yes, the sun’s effect on skin which
in any case has less melanin can
make the problem worse. If you have
only one affected spot, it would be
better to take precautions than be
sorry later. You have obviously con -
sulted the doctor well in time, and
so might as well get the full benefit
A
of that and take all the needed
precautions.
The skin on my knees and elbows
seems very rough and dry. What can
I do?
We often ignore these areas of
our body and they get neglected and
rough skin builds up. Make a paste of
one tsp milk powder, half an egg
white and half tsp lemon juice. Apply
to the area and leave for a few
minutes before washing off. Also, you
can massage olive oil at night to
soften the skin here.
I tend to get a film of oiliness on my
face most of the time. I work from
home and do not use much make-up,
so I wonder how to combat this in the
most natural way.
Well, oiliness in the morning as
you wake up or after a few hours is
not unhealthy as, when you sweat,
24
some oil also comes to the surface.
However, to fight it, you just apply a
very thin slice of apple to your oily
area.
If you have access to real butter-
milk from which all fat has been
removed use that as a face wash.
Egg white in a face pack is also good
to control oiliness.
With constant exposure to sun my
blemishes tend to show more. What
can I do to make them lighten up?
You have not mentioned your age.
However, you should take fresh
carrot, grate it and use the liquid with
cotton on your blemishes. Dab it and
let it dry naturally.
Regular use will affect the
blemishes. Also, consult a dermatolo-
gist to ensure there is no deep-set
reason for these blemishes.
I want a quick-fix body exfoliator
which is soothing and effective in
summer. What should I do which can
be ready in a short time?
Grind some almonds and keep
them ready – they should not be
powder but effective as exfoliation
material. Mix some fresh mint leaves
and a teaspoon of honey. Apply on
your body and leave on for a few
minutes. Then rub it in with small
circular movements and this will help
you get rid of dead skin as also boost
blood circulation.
My friends tell me that washing hair
with beer makes it good but nobody
in my home drinks beer and I don’t
want to buy beer just for my hair.
What do I do?
In beer it is the glycerine and hops
content that is good for the hair. You
can make an easy alternative with
barley water. Add some lemon juice
to it and use it as a last rinse. Or you
can make a mix of egg white, lemon
juice and some barley water and
apply to your scalp.
Shampoo after half an hour and
then use barley water and lemon
juice for a last rinse. Do not put plain
water after that.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
How long does it take to recover from
Botox treatment and how do I find out
if it is what I need? I am 32 and have
deep frown lines.
The Botox injection procedure
does not take more than 10 minutes
and officially there is no ‘recovery
time’. You can resume your normal
activities almost immediately after
walking out of the therapists. How
effective it would be in your individual
case only a practitioner can evaluate
after checking out the depth of the
lines. Essentially, it freezes the
muscle of the area, so you cannot
frown any more.
I want to know if there is a natural
way to bleach facial hair. I do not
want to use chemical market
bleaches on my face.
Natural bleach works slowly and
the results are not dramatic. You can
dry orange skin in winter and powder
it, mix a teaspoon with milk and apply
to your face for 20 minutes. This will
also help with skin-conditioning and
lighten the hair.
While everybody is complaining
about oily skin in summer, I still
combat a very dry skin and do not
know how to get rid of dry patches
around my forehead.
Do check that it is dryness and not
dandruff. You can use the heavy
cream that you get on milk and mix
with ripe papaya mash. Add oatmeal
powder, so it stays on your face and
apply it thrice a week. Wash off after
20 minutes.
I am 21 and my problem is the tan
that summer invariably brings. I try to
put sunblock but it wears off. How
can I rid myself of this suntan on any
face and feet which is much worse?
Make a mix of egg white and
honey and apply it to your face and
even feet. Leave it there for a 20
minutes before washing off. You
should apply a thicker coat of sun
screen on your feet as they get
terribly tanned, as at least for the
face you have dark glasses, etc.
Should we have a shower before or
after the swim? What is better for the
hair?
Your hair is porous and can take
water and retains it. So, if you wash
it only with water just before you
enter the pool the damage caused
by chlorine would be minimal. And
if you wash it with shampoo after
your swim then your hair would be
rid of any chlorine you have
accumulated.
Since we sweat so much during
summer, is there still a need to
exfoliate so regularly. What is the
best exfoliator in this season of
excessive heat?
While we sweat we are also
building dead cells that make our skin
appear dull. Use milder forms of
exfoliation which you can tweak in
formulations at home. Mix almond
meal with yogurt, apply on your face
and neck and leave for half an hour.
Moisten with warm water and rub off
gently. If your skin is oilier you should
do this more often.
I love the smell of roses and want to
know how I can use it to make my
hair smell of roses.
You can use either rose water or
even rose essential oil. Just
remember to use the right proportion
in your last rinse. If using the
essential oil, just a drop or two in two
mugs full of water is sufficient but if
using rose water, you will need to use
it almost in an equal quantity of water
so that the fragrance lingers.
I want to know how to make a last
rinse of tea for my hair which is of
waist-length and can I just leave this
in the hair without washing it out?
Take two glasses of water and
when it is boiling add one teaspoon of
ordinary tea leaves to it. Boil for two
minutes. When it is cool just keep the
liquid aside.
When you want to use it, add one
big teaspoon of lemon juice to it. After
your shampoo, and if you use
conditioner, then after the conditioner
slowly pour it over your hair and let the
hair be covered in it. No need to put
more water to wash this off.
I have a good recipe of face pack
with orange juice which is easy to
make in winter, but what do I do in
summer?
You can take orange juice without
adding sugar to it which is sold as
drink and use that. Alternatively you
can get orange essential oil and use
literally a drop of that. During next
winter you can dry the orange peel
and powder it to use in your face
pack for similar results.
 A woman Like
Nandita
Geeta couldn’t understand how the voluptuous and tantalising
danseuse who had been her businessman husband’s ex-fiancee, could
remain his best friend and still be so generous to his wife. That’s till
she got to know Nandita properly. By Kasturi Rangachari

“N
andita called yesterday and face, her bewitching smile, her beautiful eyes and
congratulated me,” Kumar said casually her sweet voice – all of which were familiar to every
and I gave a slight start that he luckily art-loving, newspaper-and-magazine-reading, TV-
did not see. But he did see the surprise watching member of the public – and I glanced at
mixed with alarm that sprang into my Kumar, wondering how he had been able to come
eyes and he smiled in amusement. “Do to terms with while losing all that.
you find it strange that my ex-fiancee But the sight of him made me ask myself another
should ring me up and congratulate me on my question. Why would someone as good-looking,
engagement to you?” he asked, a teasing note in his urbane, successful, mature and wonderful as Kumar,
voice. want to marry a woman as prosaic and ordinary as I
We were having dinner in an elite multi-cuisine was? Marry a woman more than a dozen years
restaurant that was all the rage just then among the younger – he was 34 and I was 20 – and several
sophisticated crowd Kumar belonged to, and I light years less mature and knowledgeable about
stopped eating and stared at him nonplussed, not
knowing what to say. Was I surprised? Yes, I was.
Did I think it strange? Yes, I did. But could I tell him
that without him considering me immature and
unsophisticated? No, I couldn’t!
“There is one thing that you must understand,
Geeta,” he said, a little more seriously when it
became obvious that I wasn’t going to reply to his
question. “Nandita and I split up, but we are still
good friends. In fact, she is my best friend –
someone to whom I can tell anything and everything
– and I am probably her best friend too. Do you
mind?”
Did I mind? Did I mind that a fascinating,
beautiful, talented and captivating woman, a
woman who was fast making a name for herself as
a world-famous dancer was my husband’s best
friend? Of course I did!
“Of course not,” I said as heartily as I could.
“I understand.”
But the truth was that understanding the situation
was the last thing that I was capable of. For one
thing, I didn’t understand why any man in his right
senses would be ready to give up a woman like
Nandita. I thought of her statuesque figure, her
rounded hips, her deep breasts, her heart-shaped
anything and everything, than he was? Even my
name – Geeta – was one of the most common names
in the country!
Nandita brought life
into our rather staid
group that day. She was
SHORT
STORY

But these were questions I had never dared ask
Kumar, even in the moments we were close and he
was tender. Not only did I constantly feel the age
difference between us, but I was also incessantly
overwhelmed by the thought of my ignorance about
practically everything and my general inadequacy
when compared to his experience, his sophistication
and the scintillating conversation he was capable of
on any topic under the sun.
“Nandita also told me that she’ll be in Mumbai
for a show tomorrow,” Kumar told me later, as he
dropped me off at home. “I wonder how I missed the
announcement in the papers, but anyway I’m
meeting her after the performance for a late dinner.
So I won’t be able to see you tomorrow.”
“That’s all right,” I mumbled, wondering why he
wasn’t taking me along to meet his “best friend”. As
usual, he read my mind.
in high spirits and she laughed and joked
with Kumar and his family and friends, all of
whom she of course knew. But my relatives
and friends had shell-shocked looks on their
faces and my parents stood protectively on
either side of me, trying to smile but looking
what they were really feeling – outraged
that Nandita should have been so
insensitive as to attend Kumar’s wedding
when they had been involved and had then
broken up. Luckily, neither Nandita nor
Kumar even noticed the tension that
surrounded me.
Oddly enough, I understood. These people
belonged to a class of society that my family didn’t
belong to. We were definitely conservative middle
class, with all the usual middle-class hang-ups about
not wanting to make waves. But Kumar, Nandita
and their friends were part of the rich, to-the-manor-

I
smiled weakly and, jumping out of the
car, shut the door behind me. I
remembered to turn and wave when I
reached the verandah of my home, but I
was on the verge of tears as I went in.
Nandita, the famous dancer who attracted
eyes wherever she went, was going to
attend my marriage to her ex-fiance who
was still her best friend! She and Kumar
and their upper-crust, sophisticated friends
might not find that strange, but my much
more ordinary parents, already in a daze
about the marriage their only daughter was
going to enter into, would. In fact, I did
too!
And Nandita did attend my wedding. At
Kumar’s insistence, we were having a
registered wedding attended only by close friends
and relatives and she swept in just as the clerk
born aristocracy and didn’t give a hoot
I understood. about what people thought of them. I had
These people somehow got involved with them and now
belonged to a class it was up to me to make myself acceptable
of society that my to them.
family didn’t We got through the formalities and
belong to. We Kumar and I were married. My father and
were definitely uncle signed as witnesses for me and, as
conservative Kumar’s parents were no more, a
middle class, with
childhood friend of his, Alok Mehta,
all the usual
signed for him first. I watched tensely to
middle-class
see who would be his second witness. He
was quite capable of asking his “best
hang-ups about
friend” Nandita to sign for him and she
not wanting to
would be quite capable of agreeing to. But
make waves.
Kumar asked an aunt who was the oldest
member of his family to be a witness and
she happily agreed and signed the register.

T
called us in. And, from that moment, I became a
nonentity at my own wedding!
Nandita was wearing a gorgeous designer sari,
much more eye-catching than my own expensive, but reason I couldn’t really fathom, Kumar seemed to
sober Kancheepuram silk. Around her neck were a
number of long gold chains and she wore chunky
bangles on her wrists. She had loads of mascara on
her eyes, a big red bindi on her forehead and long
strings of jasmine in her hair.
She looked both dramatic and exquisite – just
right for the dancer that she was. People have
always said that I am pretty, but my prettiness is an
insipid kind of prettiness. Next to her I was like a
single jasmine flower put beside a flaming crimson
rose!
he start of my married life, my actual wedding,
might not have been particularly pleasant, but
life after that was absolutely blissful. For some
love me very much and he was kind and tender and,
above all, very patient with me. I blundered along,
learning to run his palatial home as efficiently as he
wanted, to manage his household help, to give good
parties, to entertain his friends and even to open my
mouth without making a fool of myself.
Two years passed and we didn’t have a child, but
neither of us minded too much. We were too happy
to worry about anything and when the doctor told us
that nothing was wrong and that children would
come along when Nature decided that it was time

28 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

for them, we accepted that and thoroughly enjoyed
ourselves in the interim.
“We must take Nandita to View from the Hill,”
he’d say. “She loves Mexican food!” or “This
boutique you’re getting your salwar suits from these
days. You must take Nandita there.”
The jealousy I felt was not because I doubted
Kumar. It was because I knew that though he loved
me, Nandita was special to him and that she was
his friend in ways that I could never be.
hand on mine for a moment.
“Kumar must have told you but I can guess how
he did it!” she said, a note of affectionate mockery
in her voice. “He gave you the bare bones. Told you
that I had fallen in love with someone else and then
told you that there was no need to ever talk about
the past again! But that bare-bones version didn’t
really satisfy you, did it?”
“No, it didn’t,” I admitted ruefully.

S
The days that she was in town – never more than he was silent for long minutes and sat gazing
three or four – would be frantic. Though she would into the distance as she went back to those
stay at either the Taj or the Le Meredien, she would days.
spend all the time she could spare from rehearsals “I was an up-and-coming dancer in those days and
and performances with us – either both of us or with Kumar and I met in Delhi at a party given for the
just me because Kumar often had work that he could famous dancer Veena Vasudevan. It was love at first
not postpone. sight for both of us! We were a pair soon and we
When the three of us were together, I’d mostly both knew that some time in the future, when we
remain quiet because Kumar and Nandita would be were both ready, when Kumar had established
talking their heads off. I’d stare at her as she talked himself and I had made a name for myself as a
– she always talked very animatedly, waving her classical dancer, we’d get married. But there
hands about a great deal, various expressions seemed no hurry for that to happen. We were far
flitting, one after another, across her mobile face – too happy living each exciting day to the full, to
and I’d wonder about their break-up. And, while I bother too much about the future!
wondered, the green-eyed monster would eat into “Those were the days that Kumar had first started
me. riding high, getting promotion after promotion and I
“My father teaches in a college and my mother in had just joined Anandraj’s dance troupe. We were
a school,” I told her. “We’re very ordinary people. both doing well and we were both happy and busy.
The only thing special is that we have this rather We spent our free time going for shows and spending
dilapidated and old, but large bungalow on the hours chatting with friends and with each other.
seafront in central Mumbai that my father inherited “Then Kumar began to think of branching out on
from a distant relative. If it weren’t for that his own and, though I was all for it, it posed a
bungalow, I would never have even met Kumar – problem. He wanted to start business in Mumbai,
there is no chance that our paths would ever have but I was getting more and more involved with
crossed. But he bought a house near my home and Anandraj’s troupe and didn’t want to leave Delhi.
he liked going for walks along the seafront and I did “We discussed things and decided that, for the
too and we met...and I got lucky….” time being, Kumar would move to Mumbai and I
Nandita leaned forward and stroked my cheek. would stay on in Delhi. He’d test the waters in
“No, he got lucky,” she said softly. Mumbai and I too would see if I could move there.
I stared at her nonplussed. What sort of a woman “Kumar went to Mumbai and set up his
was this who could pay from-the-heart consultancy firm there. Business soon
compliments to the wife of a man she had picked up and he didn’t want to return to
once loved very much and whom she even What sort of a Delhi. But the dance troupe too began to
now loved very much as a friend? Was her woman was this do well. We began to give performances
large-heartedness the reason why Kumar who could pay all over the country and even abroad. I
was so drawn to her? from-the-heart was given solos too in our performances
compliments to and I didn’t want to give all that up and

O
ne day, she spontaneously answered
the question I had been dying to
ask her.
“You wonder why Kumar and I broke
up, don’t you?” she asked while we were
having lunch after a morning of hectic
shopping on one of her visits. I gave a start loved very much each other. We met for a few days every
and she laughed gaily and put her
exquisitely manicured and bejewelled
move to Mumbai and start afresh.
the wife of a
“We went on like that for two years. We
man she had were young, we loved each other and we
once loved very were filled with energy. We were sure that
much and whom we could conquer the world – and that time
she even now and distance could not destroy our love for
few months and we made those days
as a friend? memorable!

30 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 “And then,” she paused, then looked at me
steadily and resumed speaking, “I became involved
with Anandraj. It wasn’t that I fell out of love with
Kumar, it was just that Anandraj became more and
more a part of my life. Kumar was far away,
Anandraj was always there – and perhaps for me,
the immediate and the present are always more
important than the distant and the future. The fact
that I had remained true to Kumar for two years,
actually shows how much I had loved him!
“Besides, Anandraj and I had so much in
common! His exuberance and passions matched
mine and our great love for dance was another
bond between us. He began to choreograph special
dances of me and, besides dancing as a part of the
troupe, I began to get invitations to give solo
performances. Fame, adulation and money were all
coming my way – and Kumar seemed very far away
from all that was happening in my life.”
N
andita sighed and put her hand on mine. “I
know that you will wonder what
kind of woman I am to fall in and
out of love so easily. But Anandraj was
my alter ego – he understood what I felt
without my telling him – he lived to
dance, just as I did…and we both
realised that we were fated to be
together.
“I hadn’t told Kumar about my
feelings till then – not because I
wanted to hide things from him, but
because I was confused. But the
next time he came to Delhi I told
him – with great trepidation! He
looked at me with so much pain in
his eyes that I felt as if my heart was
breaking. Then he got up and walked
away.
“I thought that he would never want to see me
again and I felt lost and lonely. I then realised that,
though I needed Anandraj in one way, I needed
Kumar too, in another way and I was so unhappy.
“A few days later, to my great joy, Kumar came
to see me again. And he told me that he understood.
That he realised that Anandraj and I were made for
each other in a way he and I weren’t, because of
our common love for dance. And he told me that he
needed me too – as a friend. I wept my heart out
that day and from then we have been best friends.
Do you understand that?”
I couldn’t understand that. Surely, Kumar would
have felt betrayed and heartbroken? But I didn’t say
that and instead changed the subject.
“And then you married Anandraj? And he
understood your friendship with Kumar?”
32 Woman’s Era
“Yes.”
I didn’t understand that either. But then these
people belonged to a different world from the one I
had grown up in and to which I still belonged!
I had one more question that I wanted to ask
Nandita, but I didn’t dare ask it. Ours had been a
whirlwind courtship and Kumar and I had got
married less than a year after he had broken up with
Nandita.
Nandita had been watching my face. Worldly
wise as she was, it couldn’t have been difficult for
her to read the thoughts going through my head.
“Are you happy, Geeta?” she asked.
“I…suppose…so.”
“You suppose so?”
“I can be happy only if Kumar is and I don’t...
really see...how…he can be.”
“What?” the surprise in Nandita’s voice was
unmistakable.
“How can he be happy, really happy, with me,
when he has been involved with you? I must seem
like a glass of milk after a glass of champagne! How
could he have forgotten you?”
“Oh my dear, are you blind?” Nandita asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t you see the passionate love in
Kumar’s eyes whenever he looks at
you?
I gaped at
her as she went
on, “And, as for
milk and
champagne, milk is
wholesome and
nourishing. Champagne
may be heady, but it leaves you
with a headache the next morning!”
I laughed then, laughed with her, feeling as if a
weight off my mind.
“Now tell me, are you happy?” she asked me
again, this time with a smile and a teasing note in
her voice.
● July (Second) 2009
 “Blissfully happy! And I’d be ecstatic if I had a
child.”
“A child!” Nandita’s voice became tender. “Yes.”
“Mahima is four now, isn’t she?”
“Four and a half.”
“Doesn’t she miss you when you are away?”
“I suppose she does. But she understands that
mummy has to go and dance wherever she’s asked
to.”
From that day, I felt that I too had a friend in
Nandita. But I was still aware that she was Kumar’s
friend more than she could ever be mine.
Another two years passed and I still didn’t
become pregnant. But, though I was disappointed
about that, I fulfilled a dream of mine by opening a
boutique in which I sold clothes that I had designed
myself. Kumar funded that together with a small
workshop in which four tailors and a few
apprentices made the clothes I designed. For some
reason my boutique proved popular and I began to
be very busy and, when I was busy, I forgot about
my childless state.
heart. “And Mahima?” I cried.
“She’s all right, thank goodness.”
“Why didn’t you tell me all this earlier? I’m sure
that Nandita told you right after she and Anandraj
came to know.”
“I didn’t want to upset you.”
“Upset me? Well, you’ve upset me now all right!
And you are not going to visit them again!”
“Geeta, control yourself! Be reasonable.”
“I am being reasonable. If both Anandraj and
Nandita have full-blown AIDS, I don’t want you to
go there and nurse them!”
“But there’s absolutely no danger in being with
AIDS patients or in nursing them!”
“Then why are doctors and nurses said to be in
danger from patients with AIDS? Why do nursing
homes turn them away and why do surgeons refuse
to operate on them?”
“Well, surgeons are at some risk but...”
“And so is anyone who nurses them during the
last stages!”
“No! And anyway, I’m not going to nurse them!”
“I know you! You will nurse Nandita if she needs

S
he also seemed to be falling ill often. In fact,
Anandraj too seemed to be falling ill frequently.
Nandita and Kumar still seemed to need each
other and he made several trips to Delhi to see her
during this period. And then came another SOS, this
time because Anandraj was ill, and Kumar prepared
to air-dash to Delhi again.
“Both Nandita and Anandraj seem to be falling ill realised what I was doing, he tried to grab the
very often,” I commented as I watched Kumar
throwing a few things into a bag, a frown of worry
on his face. “What is it this time?”
“A bad cold that has gone to his chest and
become pneumonia.” Kumar hesitated as if he were
wondering whether to say anything further or not.
He then seemed to decide not to, because he turned
away.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Nothing.”
“No, there is something. Something
about Anandraj. About Nandita. Don’t
hide it from me.”
Kumar sat down and looked at me with
eyes filled with pain. “You had better sit
down,” he said heavily and when I did so,
he went on. “Both Anandraj and Nandita
tested positive for HIV two years ago and
now both have full-blown AIDS.” As I
stared at him stunned, he went on softly,
“Anandraj picked up the infection through
a blood transfusion. But he initially did not
know that he had the infection and he gave
it to Nandita.”
My mouth fell open as terror filled my
nursing. And you are not going to!”
For the first time since I had known him, Kumar
became angry with me. “I am going to Delhi,
Geeta,” he said, his voice cold. “Just accept that.”
“No, I won’t let you go!”
As he watched me puzzled, I picked up the
phone and dialled Nandita’s number. When he
phone from me, but by that time Nandita had picked
the receiver up.
“Nandita,” I said, “I’m Geeta speaking.”
“Hi, Geeta! Is Kumar leaving today?” Nandita
sounded tired and weak.
I hesitated and refused to meet Kumar’s eyes.
“Nandita,” I said. “Kumar has just told me
about…about your illness.”
“I see.”
“I’m very sorry. More sorry than I can
say.”
“How can “Yes.”
he be happy, “But...I can’t let Kumar come there.”
Nandita was silent and I went on, “I may
really happy, be wrong, but I’m terrified that he will pick
with me, when up the...the infection.”
he has been “I understand!” Nandita’s voice was
involved with filled with affection. “It’s all right.”
you? I must “I’m sorry…”
seem like a “Don’t be. I said I understand.”
“Kumar is angry with me.”
glass of milk “Let me talk to him.”
after a glass of I silently handed the receiver to my
champagne!” husband. He took it and listened for a long
time as Nandita spoke to him. “All right,”

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 33

he said finally. “I won’t come. And no, I’m Kumar left by a late afternoon flight. He
Anandraj had told me that he would phone as soon
not angry with Geeta.”
“How are they?” I would ask every time picked up the as he had spoken to Nandita and she had
Kumar and Nandita spoke to each other. infection told him what was troubling her and I
Kumar would shake his head and tell me through a waited restlessly for his call. It came late at
seriously that both were worse. blood night.
“Nandita is weakening faster than transfusion. “She’s dying, Geeta,” said Kumar and I
Anandraj,” he told me one day. knew that he was fighting to hold back his
I was thoroughly confused those days. But he initially tears. “It won’t be much longer...a couple
Had I been right in preventing Kumar from did not know of days perhaps...perhaps less...and
going and seeing Nandita? Was it partly that he had the Anandraj won’t be with us much longer
jealously that had made me so adamant? infection and either. He’s better than she is now, but I
If it was so dangerous to go anywhere he gave it to know that he will not be able to take
near AIDS patients, would there be so Nandita. Nandita’s death.”
many educated and prominent people I did not know what to say. “Please stay
fighting for greater justice for them? Had I there as long as you are needed,” I said
been wrong, terribly wrong, in preventing Kumar finally and then asked, “What was it that she
from going to see his best friend? wanted to tell you?”
And Nandita was such a wonderful person. She There was a long silence. “Kumar,” I asked, “are
was a free spirit who lived life on her own terms, but you all right?”
she was also warm and loving and giving, and she He cleared his throat. “Yes,” he said.
brought laughter and joy wherever she went. “What did Nandita want to tell you? Anandraj
And what about little Mahima? What would that said that she was desperate.”
child be going through? Nandita had no close There was another pause and then Kumar spoke.
family, but Anandraj had two brothers. Would they “She wants you ...me... us...to take Mahima,” he said.
be looking after her now? Would one of them adopt “Bring her up as our own. And Anandraj says that if
the little girl after ... after she was orphaned? that is what Nandita wants, that is what he too wants.”
I began to talk to activists and to surf the Internet I sat down, my legs too weak to bear my weight.
for information on the transmission of AIDS. And as I Nandita was generous even in death!
learnt more and more about the disease, my heart “Oh, Kumar!” I gasped, my voice filled with
sank and I was filled with guilt. I had been so wrong emotion. “We’ll have a daughter!”
in keeping Kumar and Nandita apart! “Are you sure, Geeta? It will mean a big
responsibility. Mahima is nearly eight years old now

A
nd then one day, just around the time I had and, after the double tragedy that will hit her soon, it
begun to wonder what to do, Anandraj rang won’t be easy to make her feel secure and loved.
up and told Kumar that Nandita was dying. I And she has been brought up in a very different way
flicked on the speaker-phone so that I too could hear ... There will be clashes, problems.”
Anandraj’s words. “She’s desperate to tell you “There are no problems that love cannot solve. I
something,” Anandraj told Kumar. “She’s writing want her, Kumar!”
you a letter and I’ll send it as soon as she has “Then…I will bring her back with me. But I will
finished it. Only she is so weak that she is not able have to stay here till…the end.”
to write more than a few lines at a time...” “Of course.”
“Anandrajji,” I interrupted, my eyes on Kumar’s “Nandita said something else, Geeta. She told
pain-filled face, “Kumar will fly there and meet me to tell you to bring Mahima up to be like you.
Nandita. Please tell her that.” She said that there is nothing like a glass of
“Geeta…” nourishing milk. What did she mean?”
“Tell Nandita that I’m sorry my foolishness kept “I’ll tell you later. But you tell her that I would like
her from seeing her best friend during the time she Mahima to grow up to be like her – a loving and
probably needed him the most,” I said. “She needn’t giving person who follows her heart and lives life
write what she wants to tell him. She can tell him fully.”
what she wants in person.” “I’ll tell her that.”
“Then he should come quickly. I don’t know how I put down the phone. Yes, I would do my best to
much time she has.” bring Mahima up to become a woman like Nandita.
“He’ll be there this evening.” I was sad when I thought of what was happening in
I turned and looked at Kumar. He smiled and held Delhi, but I was also filled with dreams – dreams for
his arms open and I walked into them. my daughter, Mahima. We

34 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 COSMETIC GALA
The delicate way to take care of your face
and hands. By Our Correspondent
Gautam Sarkar, CEO
Gautam Sarkar is the Chief
Executive Officer of Gala of London.
With a wealth of experience, he is
keeping the organisation’s flag
flying.
Face and hand care are
uppermost in any woman’s mind
as regards the total beautification
of her body. What parts need the
special attention?
Face is the mirror of our
personality, so face care is the most
important part for any woman.
But hand care is also very
important because it is the other
visible part of our body.
What are the steps to feminine
beautification?
For face CTM (cleansing, toning,
moisturising) is a must. One face
pack is very important for daily care
routine. For that we can talk about
Sandalwood Face pack, which can be
applied thrice a week. As Sandalwood
is a very essential component for skin
care, it helps to moisturise balancing,
gives a glow to the skin.
To look beautiful, a woman
needs good products to enhance
her beauty. Can you tell me about
those products?
To enhance beauty colour
cosmetics plays a vital role, so I will
prefer Gala of London, as it ensures
best quality with lowest possible
budget.
A woman’s lips draw
everyone’s attention and lipstick
is a good enhancer. Can you
suggest any good lipstick?
Of course Gala of London,
because it gives a wide choice of
colour and again with a good quality
which ensure no bleeding and long
stay with minimum budget.
Focus on the eyes always
sends a message. How can I
beautify my eyes?
Eyes express the beauty, so to
make it more beautiful few products
can be used, like- Kajal (the old
theory of beauty), Eyeliner, Mascara.
First apply Kajal, then apply Eyeliner
according to your eye shape and
then apply Mascara on eyelashes.
How can I take care of my nails,
so that they remain lustrous and
blemish-free?
Hand care is an important part of
daily care routine. Do manicure
regularly. During manicure apply
cuticle softener to remove undesired
cuticles. After that clean your nails
with Nail polish remover, then apply
base coat, after that apply nail polish
as per your choice, on top of that
apply top coat, which will provide an
extra lustrous look and will ensure
long stay of your nail colour. Base
coat will prevent your nails from
staining which can be caused by dark
shades of nail colour and also it will
help to provide a finished look to your
nail paint.
My cuticles always get brittle
and hard. How can I maintain their
smooth and soft look?
Remove nail colour, if any is
applied before, apply Cuticle softener
on your nails with cotton, and leave it
for five minutes then remove the cuticle.
I would like to get good nail
polish, in addition to right nail
polish remover. Can I get any
branded one?
Yes, it’s again the same brand –
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Gala Of London, which will provide
you 70 shades of colour with lowest
rate, and also ensure colour on
first coat application ensuring long
stay.
Right choice of nail polish remover
is very important because high
alcohol content remover may harm
the nails. Gala of London remover
contains humectants which
does not allow extra dryness on nail
surface.
I have used many brands of
mascara, but so far they have not
produced the desired result? Are
there good products with right
ingredients available in the
market?
As eye is most sensitive area, so
right choice of mascara is an
important job, Gala of London is
having two mascaras – all-weather
mascara – which has water retention
power, run-proof mascara – which
gives a volume look to your eyelashes.
As an Indian woman I fancy
using good kajal but could not get
hold of good one. Can I get any
good kajal which does not wear off
soon?
Kajal is a definition of Indian
beauty, and we judge the quality by
their bleeding nature.
Gala of London’s Kajal is the one
which does not bleed for a long time
period, also gives a finished look to
the eyes.
Gala of London is the company
which provides a branded product
with best possible quality and with
best economic pricing. We ensure a
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35
 A perfect regal look

Here are some

different hair
styles. You choose
the one best suited
to your personality.
Surely, the hairdo

your hair
will enhance your
sexuality.
The ways you can wear
 Figure me out

Invitation to romance

The decisive move

Woman’s hairstyle changes

whenever the situation and
Target in sight
trend demand it. The style is
truly a matter of personal
preference, and the intended
mood it wants to create.

Making up
the mind
 The Peculiar Man
Appearances can often be deceptive. By Leena Raj

I
t was my first day in office and I entered it with jumped out of my chair.
some trepidation. Back at college, I was He must have been around 35 having a medium
boisterous and this apprehension was quite height, medium complexion, a growing belly and a
alien to me. But this wasn’t college and neither receding hairline. What was more striking about
was I amongst my notorious gang. I glanced him was his dress. A dark green pants with a
around nervously. It was like any other designed rani pink shirt. (Goodness knows from
corporate office. Sophisticated, spick and span where he got the fabric!) My nose automatically
with plush interiors, wooden cabins, glass partitions wrinkled up in distaste.
and immaculately dressed young men at their desks. What a weird dress!
I looked around for ladies.There were quite a few of “Dying to know more about me? Well, let me
them dressed in elegant pant suits. have the pleasure of introducing myself. I
I looked at myself. Since I was not sure am Samuel, Sam in short – and sweet to all
about the dress code I had to debate about I headed for the my close ones, especially to you,” he
what I should wear. I didn’t want to be receptionist looked into my eyes and grinned at me. I
either too modern or too traditional. So I who directed could not utter a word, unable to come out
finally decided for a pair of jeans with a me to the of my shock.
decent, well-fitting long top. Luckily, I CEO. “Well, we have countless days ahead
wasn’t looking out of place. Must get a Contrary to and lots of fun to look forward to. Till then,
couple of pant suits, I resolved. my bye, dear.”
I headed for the receptionist who expectations, He left me gaping after him. I watched
directed me to the CEO. Contrary to my the CEO was him going around, exchanging a word or
expectations, the CEO was a smart and a smart and two with everyone, shaking hands with
suave young man with a no-nonsense suave young some and patting the shoulders of others.
attitude. With a brief “hi” and a warm man with a He scampered around for a while and
smile, he quickly glanced over my no-nonsense disappeared into the CEO’s cabin.
appointment letter and entrusted me to his attitude. I expected him to come out with a sullen
personal assistant. face as he was a good half an hour late
The PA escorted me to my cabin and introduced and I have heard that in a corporate office, every
me to those around. Everyone seemed to be minute counts. He came out after a while but as
amicable. The PA briefed me on my job assignment cheerful as before and disappeared again.
and asked me to get acquainted with the files and What a strange man! I could not help but say this
reports. My fears being assuaged, I settled down to myself. Amongst these sophisticated and amiable
comfortably in my chair. people, he seemed to be a misfit.
I switched on the system and began to go through It was lunchtime and I joined the others for lunch.
the files when I was scared out of my wits. There was only one common room for men and
“Hi gorgeous! I am delighted at this new addition women. I look out my lunch box doubtfully. I had to
to the existing bevy of beauties.” carry it to satisfy my mother. But I was relieved to
The voice sounded so near in my ear that I almost see that the others carried their lunch too. I opened

38 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

my box and held it out to others.
“Wow! Parathas! My favourite, What luck!”
The strange man appeared out of the blue and
grabbed the tiffin box from my hand.
“I’m sure you have made a study of my likes and
dislikes before you joined this office. Otherwise,
how would you know that I love parathas? Anyway,
thanks,” he began munching my parathas while I
fumed inside.
W
hat a mannerless fellow! How shameless to
eat my food without my offering it! And his
audacity to say that I made a study of his
likes and dislikes! Why should I? To trap him? What
does he think of himself? Prince Charming? Forget
about falling for him, he doesn’t even deserve a
second look! While I boiled inside, he gobbled up
my parathas and disappeared within no time.
I thought the others would sympathise with me but
nobody seemed to have noticed anything amiss.
They all offered me their boxes oblivious of my
anger. After some time, the attendant came with a
plate of sandwiches and coffee and placed them
before me. Seeing the questioning look on my face
he informed, “Sir has sent this for you.”
“Which sir?”
“Oh, it must be Sam, in return for your parathas,”
said Divya.
Woman’s Era
Oh, the dumb head
had a fragment of sense
in him! But I was in no
SHORT
STORY
mood to accept anything from him.
It was my birthday that day. It had
always been my habit to treat my friends to
chocolates and home-made cake for which
they all craved. So mom packed a large
box full of cake slices which I offered to my
colleagues. They showered me with wishes
and relished the delicious chocolate cake.
“Hey, what’s going on here?”
Goodness! It was the pest, the last person
on earth whom I would wish to see, at least
today. I had no option but to offer him a
slice.
“Happy birthday, dear,” he popped the slice into
his mouth. “Reminds me of my schooldays,” he
chuckled.
“Why?” I frowned.
“Birthday party, celebration, cake, chocolates are
all a part of schooldays, you know!” he said.
“Why?” Don’t you celebrate your birthday?” I
countered.
“If at all I have one. My illiterate parents were too
ignorant to note down my date of birth. And the one
recorded in my certificates is not the real one. So
why bother? Saves money, doesn’t it?”
“But, surely, you must be celebrating your
children’s birthdays,” I stressed the word ‘children’. I
wanted him to know that his age was conspicuous.
“Oh yes, I surely do with pomp and gaiety,” he
stretched his arms wide.
Disgusting! It was not only impossible to talk to
him but also useless. And he spoilt my day. He was
getting on my nerves far too much. How I wished he
would vanish into thin air!
I
t looked like a bad day for me. I prepared a
project with great care but the corrections
suggested by the project manager meant redoing
the whole thing. The deadline being the next day, I
had no option but to stay back and redo it. I
prepared myself mentally. While all the others left by
their usual time, I sat down with my work.
“No intention of going home? Had a fight with
mom? Planning to run away from home?”
Oh, no! Not the odd man again to add to my
woes! “I have to complete my project,” I said
without taking my eyes off the computer.
“Need any help?”
“No, thanks,” I said curtly.
“Okay, as you wish,” saying so he
walked away. The thick-skinned man! No
shame to talk to me time and again being
fully aware that I hated him like hell. Anyway, I
● July (Second) 2009 39
had no time to waste on him. I concentrated on my
work.
I came out of the office with the satisfaction of
redoing the project perfectly. But my happiness
evaporated as I saw the pest seated on his bike and
chatting with the watchman. Why was he hanging
around here! I frowned.
“Come on, I’ll drop you home,” he offered.
“Thanks, but no. I can go by myself,”
“But finding a rickshaw at this time is next to
impossible.”
I looked at him in disbelief.
“Yes, madam, you cannot get an auto here. At
least sir can drop you at the rickshaw stand from
where you will be able to get a ride,” said the
watchman. I had to yield, though grudgingly.
S
leep eluded me that night. What could be the
intention of the peculiar man? Why did he hang
around after everybody left? That too knowing
that I was the only one around. Why did he offer me
a lift? To create an impression or with an evil
intention? If I had not insisted on getting down at the
auto stand where could he have taken me?
Our office was in the suburbs and there is no
dearth of lonely roads and dark places. I only
thought of him as a foolish man but – who knows –
he might be a wolf in sheep’s clothing. I had to be
careful with him. I decided to voice my doubts to
Divya.
“Yesterday, I was late in completing my project
and as I came outside, I saw Mr Samuel waiting.”
“Was he? Trust him for that. Whenever one of us
gets late, he always stays back to escort us home.
He feels that it is not safe for women to go alone at
night. So sweet of him.”
“But, isn’t he eccentric?”
“Don’t bother Nisha,” Divya laughed. “You’ll get
used to his ways.”
Well, the others may find him kind and sweet, but
not I. But why should I ruin my peace for his sake? I
decided to ignore him.
At around 11 o’clock that day, Ramnath, our
attendant, received a phone call. His 6-year-old
daughter fell from the steps while playing and was
rushed to the hospital. Her condition was critical.
The poor man was devastated. The girl was his only
child.
The news pricked our hearts. Ramnath was a
simple man, honest, sincere and hard-working. My
heart went out to him and I wanted to help him in
some way or other. I approached the personnel
assistant and told him of my intention. I told him that
we need to help Ramnath in his crisis.
“Why not? Sure, what do you think we should
do?”
“Sir, we can all make some contribution which
will help him meet the hospital expenses.”
“Good idea! So you take the initiative and do the
needful.”
I
went around asking for contributions. I was glad
that everyone contributed generously and
willingly. Now there’s only one person left, the
odd man. Should I ask him or not? This is no time for
personal grudges, I reprimanded myself. I must do
my part.
I approached him half-heartedly.
“Mr Samuel, there is a tragedy in Ramnath’s
house and we have decided to help him financially.
So, if you could kindly donate some money it would
be of great help to him.”
He was busily arranging the files in his cabin. I
was not sure if he had followed what I said. “Mr
Samuel, what about your contribution?”
“Later,” he said, without as much glancing at me.
He took his bike keys and rushed outside.
‘What a heartless man!’ No time to spare for a
noble cause, for a moment! He rushed out as if the
world had caught fire. At other times he would
be grinning and talking nonsense, but now,
when it came to money, he became silent.
What a hypocrite!’ I felt hurt. I should not
have asked him, after all. Anyway, I
collected a good amount and I proceeded to
reach it to Ramnath. Ramnath did not come
to office the next 2 days. He came on the
third day. There was relief on his face. We
surrounded him asking about his daughter.
“She is fine and recovering fast. She lost a
lot of blood and needed blood transfusion.
Fortunately, Samuel sir was there in time. He
donated his blood. He visited us with his He is always dependable and trustworthy.”
family and they brought us dinner one day. He was I was dumbfounded. I mused over the
He even offered to arrange money towards busily past events. I tried to remember and
the hospital bill but there was no need for arranging the recollect if he had ever tried to flirt with me.
that. You all have been so kind and files in his No, never. Then why did I detest him so
generous that I was able to clear the bill cabin. I was much? Maybe because of his appearance
without any difficulty,” he folded his hands not sure if he and his unusual behaviour and his ugly
with tears in his eyes. dress sense. But not all people have a
I was bewildered. ”Unbelievable!” the
had followed good sense of dress. And how did I forget
word came out of my mouth instantly. what I said. that appearances are deceptive? No doubt
“What?” it was Divya beside me. “Mr Samuel, his manners were queer but what’s the
“That the peculiar man has a humane what harm in that as long as there was no
side in him.” about your malice in him? And, while I gloated over
“The peculiar man? You mean. Sam? He contribution?” my little act of charity, he concealed his
has always been like that. One can rely on magnanimity.
him for any help.” “Dreaming about me, as usual?” It was
“But, the way he talks and acts...” I could no he.
longer control my apprehensions. “Yes,” I looked him in the face.
“Oh! By nature he is an outgoing, humorous “And what am I in your dreams?”
person. He believes in making people happy and “A warm friend, an affectionate brother and a
tension-free. He wants to enliven those around him. compassionate human being.”
So it is just harmless talk that he indulges in. Why, “Enough, I’m flattered, I’m elated. If you don’t put
he calls us dear and darling but he never an end to your eloquent speech, I may burst like a
misbehaves with us! So don’t take him seriously. You balloon!”
know, he has one son and he adopted a girl from For the first time, I joined in his laughter
an orphanage. And every year he celebrates his wholeheartedly. After all, the peculiar man had
kids’ birthdays with the children at the orphanage. helped me in understanding him. We

were hardly in touch. I replied. The propose to that girl:”

Jab we met
My family shifted to Kalyan in
1995 when I was in the 8th standard.
New place, new school, new friends.
Sanchaita was one of my new friends
over there and later became one of
my best friends. I used to go to her
home and from there we used to go
together to school.
The scene at her place I vividly
remember is that of her elder brother
sitting near the window, engrossed in
his books. We hardly spoke to each
other. Just an occasional ‘hi’ or
‘hello’ and the conversation used to
stop there.
It was in September ’07 (almost
after 12 years) that I got an SMS
inquiring my office timings. This
came to me as very surprising as we
next SMS was if I was interested in
having a cup of coffee with him after
the office hours. I denied his request
tactfully. This was followed by a series
of SMs and e-mails cajoling me for a
meeting and the reason being he
wanted me to help him with a problem,
which he could not discuss at home. I
agreed to meet him after much coaxing
and giving due consideration to the
fact that he is my best friend’s brother.
He was the first to come that day.
Though we had not seen each other for
the last three-four years, I had no
problem in recognising him in the
crowded Dadar overbridge. We sat in a
restauarant and after some casual
conversation he came to his problem.
He wanted me to help him in proposing
to a girl he liked, but didn’t know how
to go about it. He started jotting down
points on a paper, like his expectations,
likes, dislikes, qualifications, job, etc.
Though, I felt this act of his funny, I
kept quiet. He handed over the paper
to me and said, “Go through this, I will
give you time, let me know how to
Realisation dawned that the girl
was me and the paper was his marriage
bio-data. I was in a dilemma for days
that followed, whether to say yes or
no, for he fitted into my definition of
‘husband’, but the only
disqualification being that he was of a
different caste. After three days I was
called again, as it was my turn to offer
a solution. He had planned it to be a
casual meeting. However, as our
conversation started, he sensed that I
was aware of the ‘girl’ in question and
there was no point in continuing with
his game. He didn’t waste any further
time and just popped the question. I
didn’t say ‘Yes’ but neither did I say
‘No’. This was the beginning of our
relationship. Our families acepted our
relationship. We got engaged after
three months and got married on 3
May, 2008 exactly seven months after
our first meeting. A lovely feeling
creeps in on thinking how two
strangers became sweethearts because
of just one meeting.
– Resitha Vivek.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 41

Embellishment to

Since time immemorial

beauty
women have been Beautifully
layered necklace
adorning themselves with
ornaments to draw their
beloveds closer.
Naturally, gold and gems
have become their
second love.

Glittering
danglers

A necklace for special occasion

Enticing necklace

Trendy earrings Crescent-shaped one

 Wearing it you will
be conspicuous

Danglers of a class

A picture of complete ornamentation

Made for your slender neck

A drooping necklace
and diamond danglers

Diamond
danglers and
hanging
necklace
Jewellery: DTC Ltd.
Bank Street, Karol Bagh, New Delhi.
Wholesaler & Retailer
Ph: 011-45678333

Q&
My daughter is 10 months old and
has not yet developed a single tooth.
Her gums however are hard and she
bites hard on anything she lays her
hands on. She also drools a lot these
days. I am worried about this delay
since her elder brother, who is now
three years old, erupted his first tooth
at six months of age. Please tell me if
I need to consult a doctor. What is the
right age for the first tooth to erupt?
The first tooth usually erupts
around the 6th month but there is a
wide variation. If all her other
milestones are normal, sooner or
later her teeth will erupt especially
now that her gums have become
hard. Drooling could also signify the
onset of teething.
A
On the other hand if her other
milestones like neck holding, sitting
up etc. too are delayed she needs to
be checked up thoroughly. Take her
to a paediatrician to confirm or rule
out any problematic conditions.
I have two children, a six-year-old girl
and a four-year-old boy. I love them
both a lot but they are so naughty that
I am not able to control my anger. I
beat them and then feel bad
afterwards. Please give me tips on
anger management and also tell me
how to discipline them without having
to resort to violence.
Whatever the provocation one
should not beat one’s children. Either
they become rebellious and
aggressive or become suppressed
and develop a negative personality.
44
Sit with them when they have not
done anything naughty and are in a
positive state of mind. Tell them that
you do not like beating them and
would definitely want to stop doing so
but you need their support. Tell them
that there are certain things they do,
that provoke your anger and it would
be best for all if they were avoided. If
they forget to abide by the rules set,
you can give sharp commands that
they should obey. If this does not
work, you will have to tell them to
forgo something they enjoy, for
example a cartoon programme, if they
disobey you. On the other hand,
reward them with praise, hugs and
kisses, if they have been good. Do
not fall into the trap of rewarding them
with materialistic gains (like
chocolates) for good behaviour, for it
will send the wrong signals.
My six-year-old
daughter has fine
laugh lines. Vitamin
E oil was suggested.
How do I use it? Do
I apply it on the
laugh lines only or
on the whole face?
The laugh lines your little
daughter has got are not the laugh
lines people get as a result of the
ageing process. You do not have
to worry about them or think of
erasing them. First of all they will
not go, secondly they need no
treatment. Vitamin E oil is per se
good for the skin. A few drops can
be applied on the whole face as
routine daily skin care.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
I have recently delivered my first
child and though I am
breastfeeding him I am worried if
he is getting adequate amounts of
feeds. Please tell me how to gauge
this. I have seen that even after a
full feed he wants to suckle my
finger if I put it in his mouth. Is this
a sign of hunger? Please tell me if I
should add bottle milk.
Sucking of the finger even after
a full feed is not an indicator of
hunger. This is called the rooting
reflex that all babies have at birth.
Crying alone doesn’t always
indicate hunger. The baby could be
wet, sleepy or in pain. Weight gain is
the best parameter of an adequate
feed. It should be around 25gm/day
or about 750-1000gm in one month.
I have a six-month-old boy who was
born prematurely at 30.5 weeks. He
has a slight squint in the left eye. Is it
because of prematurity? Can it be
rectified?
The squint may or may not be due
to prematurity. There is nothing that
can be done about it at the moment
though it is good to remain in touch
with an ophthalmologist. The squint
may disappear on its own as the child
grows older. If this does not occur,
the ophthalmologist will prescribe
some eye exercises to overcome the
muscle weakness for that is the
commonest cause of a squint. These
exercises have to be done diligently
to preserve binocular vision. If
exercises fail, surgery might be of
help.
Children with a squint should be
operated upon early for delay in
treatment could result in lifelong
monocular vision instead of the
normal binocular vision. This is
because the brain will register only
the images sent by the straight eye
and ignore those sent by the
defective eye. If untreated, the eye
with the squint is eventually left with
no useful vision.
Any correction done later than
eight years of age will only be for
cosmetic purposes. Your
ophthalmologist is your best guide.
– Dr Amrinder Bajaj, MD.

Rice and
frankfurter salad
RICE AND
A VEG-NON-VEG MIX
FRANKFURTER
SALAD
INGREDIENTS:
1 cup of cooked, long-grained
rice
3-4 frankfurters
2 tsp of olive oil
For the salad dressing:
3 tsp of olive oil
1 tsp of coarsely crushed red
chillies
1/ tsp of oregano powder
2 2 cups of rice
1 tsp of vinegar
2 tsp of sugar syrup
1 tsp of spicy tomato sauce
METHOD
Mix all the ingredients for the
salad dressing and prepare a
tangy dressing.
Heat the olive oil and fry the
frankfurters on medium heat
turning once or twice so that all
the sides are cooked. Allow to
cool slightly and then cut into
half-inch pieces.
In a salad bowl mix the rice,
frankfurters and pour the
dressing over it and toss gently.
Serve chilled as a salad.
46
Believe it, you
will not put the
plate down,
once you have
these items
on it.
By Roma Ghosh
MUTTON mutton with this paste adding salt
to taste. Keep the meat aside for
PULAO 2 hours. Heat a thick-bottomed
pan and add the oil and allow the
INGREDIENTS:
700 gm of mutton
whole spices to splutter. Lower
the heat and add the marinated
1 cup of dahi mutton with the marinade and
3 tsp of ginger-garlic paste cook this on medium heat for 8-10
2 tbsp of onion paste minutes, stirring all the time. Cook
2 tbsp of tomato paste till most of the juices in the mutton
3 tbsp of oil have been soaked into the mutton
1 inch piece of cinnamon pieces. Now add the rice and stir-
3 cloves fry for 3-4 minutes. Add just
2 cardamoms enough water for the rice to cook.
2 dried red chillies If there are any juices left from the
marinade, then you will need to
salt to taste add water accordingly. Cover with
a lid and cook on low fire till the
METHOD
rice is tender and all the water is
Prepare a marinade by mixing
the dahi, ginger, garlic, onion, evaporated. Serve with raita.
tomato pastes. Marinate the
RICE MOULDS
INGREDIENTS:
2 cups of rice
salt to taste
1 tsp of oil
For the first layer:
1/ cup of spinach puree
2
salt to taste
1/ tsp of roasted jeera
2
Mutton pulao powder
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

Rice moulds
For the second layer:
1/
2 cup of tomato sauce
METHOD
Soak the rice in water for 2
hours. Drain out the water and
keep aside. Boil 4 and a quarter
cups of water and add salt to
taste. Lower the heat and mix in
the soaked rice. Mix gently and
also add the oil at this stage.
Cover with a lid and allow the rice
to cook on low fire till all the water
is evaporated. The rice should
remain slightly sticky.
Remove from fire and
Rice pakoras
divide the rice into two
portions. In one portion
mix in the spinach, salt
and jeera powder and
mix gently and keep
aside. In the second
portion mix in the
tomato sauce.
To assemble: take a
mould and cover half
the mould with the
spinach rice and top it
with another layer of
tomato rice. Press the
mould tightly and then
remove the mould
gently so that you have
a double-layered mould.
Prepare all the moulds
in this way. These can
be used to serve as
starters or a side dish to
a main meal.
RICE PAKORAS
INGREDIENTS:
1 cup of cooked rice (you could
also use leftover cooked rice)
2 tsp of grated cheese
3 tsp of rice flour
1 tsp of corn flour
salt to taste
1/ cup of coconut milk
2
3 tsp of chopped coriander
leaves
chopped green chillies
oil for deep frying
METHOD
Place all the ingredients in a
mixing bowl and mix with your
fingers mashing some of the rice.
Prepare a batter which is dry and
the coconut milk is absorbed in it.
You may need to add a few tsp
of water to ensure that the dough
is of a binding consistency.
Heat oil for deep frying and
drop small portions of the batter in
hot oil and fry small crispy
pakoras.
Eating rice the healthy way
EATING RICE
THE HEALTHY
WAY
INGREDIENTS:
1 cup of rice
1 cup of leafy vegetables – any
saag – spinach, sour spinach or
even red saag
or any other saag available
1/ cup of chopped and peeled
2
pumpkin
salt to taste
1 tbsp of chana dal
soaked in water for 15
minutes
1 tbsp of oil
1 red chilli
METHOD
Wash the saag well.
Clean the rice and soak the
rice in water and leave
aside for 1 hour. Heat the
oil in a pan and add the red
chillies and allow to
splutter. Add the soaked
rice and dal and stir-fry for
3 minutes. Lower the heat
and add the leaves and the
pumpkin and stir for
another 1-2 minutes. Add 2
cups of water and add salt
to taste. Cover with a lid
and cook on low fire till all
the water has evaporated.
Serve hot with aachar. We
Courtesy: India Gate Basmati Rice
New Delhi. Ph: 011-26548400
It is pickling time.
Put creativity
into your pickles
and enjoy these
throughout
the year.
By Roma Ghosh
MANGO
PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
1 kg of raw green mangoes
1 litre of mustard oil
2 tsp of haldi powder
1/ tsp of asafoetida powder –
2 container. Cover with a muslin
hing
5-6 tsp of salt
For the spice powder:
2 tsp of saunf powder – aniseed
powder
2 tsp of amchur powder
20-25 dried red chillies
1 tsp of kala jeera – onion seeds
1/ tsp of methi seeds –
2 30 seconds. Mix in the mango
fenugreek
2 cloves
2 tsp of mustard seeds
METHOD
This aachar is spicy. You could
reduce the amount of red chillies
if you want it less firy.
Dry-roast all the ingredients for
the spice powder. Cool to room
temperature and grind to a
powder in a mixer. Keep aside.
48
Mango pickle
FOR YOUR
TASTE BUDS
Choose raw green mangoes
which are absolutely raw and
pieces of mango at one time
using a clean spoon. Put back the
have not started to ripen even a
little. Choose hard and dark green
lid and keep it in the sun from
time to time. This aachar goes
mangoes. Wash these well and well with pulao or vegetable
cut into quarter-inch pieces. biryani.
Sprinkle salt and haldi powder
and keep in a clean steel
TAMATAR
cloth and allow the mangoes to
dry in the sun or even at room
temperature for 2 days so that
CHUTNEY
most of the moisture is WITH GREEN
evaporated.
Heat half the quantity of the MANGOES
mustard oil and add the hing INGREDIENTS:
powder and allow to splutter for
pieces and stir gently. Put off the
heat, mix in the spice powder. Mix
well. In another pan heat the
remaining mustard oil and pour
over the spiced mango pieces.
Allow to cool to room
temperature. Put into glass bottles
and put the lid on the jar. Keep in
the sun for 8-10 days. Stays good
for even a year if care is taken to
Tamatar chutney with
keep it clean. Take out only a few green mangoes
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
1 kg tomatoes
1 green mango weighing around
300 gm
1/ tsp of haldi powder
2
3-4 tsp of ginger-garlic paste
3 tsp of tamarind paste
2 tsp of green chilli paste
1 cup of mustard oil
salt to taste
METHOD
Wash the tomatoes. Cut into
halves and remove the eyes of
the tomatoes and then cut into
quarters. Remove all the seeds.
Peel the mango, remove the
kernel and cut into very small
pieces. Run these pieces in a
mixture to obtain a paste.
Heat half the quantity of the oil
in a kadhai. Add the ginger-garlic
paste and stir-fry for a minute. Mix
in the tomato pieces and add salt
to taste. Cover with a lid and cook
on medium heat till most of the
moisture from the tomatoes have
evaporated. Mix in the mango
paste at this stage. Stir-fry for 2
minutes and mix in the green chilli
paste and haldi powder and more
salt. Keep stirring and cooking on
low fire for another 3-4 minutes,
adding the oil a little at a time at
short intervals. Once all the oil has
been used up and the aachar is
more or less dry, put off the heat.
Cool to room temperature. Put into
bottles. The aachar is ready for
use and will stay good for 2 weeks
without keeping in the fridge.
Serve with kachories or pakoras.
MANGO
PICKLE WITH
ASAFOETIDA
INGREDIENTS:
1 kg of raw green
mangoes
1 litre of mustard oil
50
2 tsp of haldi powder
11/2 tsp of asafoetida powder - hing
2 tsp of saunf powder – aniseed
powder
2 tsp of amchur powder
2 tsp of red chilli powder
5-6 tsp of salt
METHOD
Choose raw green mangoes
which are absolutely raw and
have not started to ripen even a
little. Choose hard and dark green
mangoes. Wash these well and
cut into quarter-inch pieces.
Sprinkle salt and haldi powder
and keep in a clean steel
container. Cover with a muslin
cloth and allow the mangoes to
dry in the sun or even at room
temperature for 2 days so that
most of the moisture is
evaporated.
Crush the hing to obtain a
powder. Also dry-grind the saunf
to obtain a powder.
Heat half the quantity of the
mustard oil and add the hing
powder and allow to splutter for
30 seconds. Now, add the saunf
powder and allow to splutter for
30 seconds. Mix in the mango
pieces and stir gently. Put off the
heat, mix in the remaining spices.
In another pan heat the remaining
mustard oil and pour over the
spiced mango pieces.
Allow to cool to
Mango pickle with
asafoetida
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
room temperature. Pour into glass
bottles and put the lid on the jar.
Keep in the sun for 8-10 days.
Stays good for even a year if care
is taken to keep it clean. Take out
only a few pieces of mango at one
time using a clean spoon. Put
back the lid and keep it in the sun
from time to time. This aachar is
not very spicy but has a fine
aroma of hing and saunf . Tastes
good with patties.
CHILLIES AND
GINGER IN
VINEGAR
INGREDIENTS:
200 gm of very small green
chillies called Thai chillies
1 cup of ginger cut into julienne
pieces
Chillies and ginger in vinegar
4 cups of vinegar or
enough to
cover the
chillies and
ginger
2 tsp of salt
METHOD
Remove the stems only
from the chillies and leave
these whole. Peel the ginger and
cut into thin julienne pieces. Wash
well and pat-dry all the moisture.
Place the ginger and chillies into a
glass jar. Pour the vinegar and 1
cup of water and salt to taste.
Close the lid. Shake well and
allow to remain for 2 days before
using. Use it with steamed rice.
Pour a few tsp with the vinegar
and the chillies and ginger over
noodles or fried rice or even have
it with momos. Stays good for 2-3
weeks. Make small quantities so
that the freshness of the pickle is
enjoyed. Serve over steamed rice
or plain boiled noodles.
CHILLIES WITH
JAGGERY
INGREDIENTS:
200 gm of green chillies
150 gm of gur-jaggery
2 tbsp of vinegar
2 tbsp of sugar
3 tbsp of tamarind paste
11/2 cups of mustard oil
salt to taste Corn and crushed chillies
METHOD
Use thin long green
chillies. Wash these well
and make a slit half ways
in each of the green
chillies. Sprinkle salt and
keep aside for 2-3 hours.
Heat all the mustard oil till
smoky. Keep half aside.
The other half, pour into a
kadhai and heat it once again.
Lower the heat and mix in the
green chillies. Cook for 2-3
minutes. Make a paste by mixing
the crushed jaggery, tamarind
paste, vinegar , sugar and a few
pinches of salt. Add this paste to
the green chillies and put off the
heat. Mix gently. Allow to cool to
room temperature. Pour into glass
bottles and put the lid on the jar.
Keep in the sun for 2-3 days.
Stays good for 2-3 months.
Tastes best with kebabs or even
small puris.
CORN AND
CRUSHED
CHILLIES
INGREDIENTS:
1 cup of crushed green chillies
Chillies with jaggery
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
11/2 cups of corn niblets
2 cups of mustard oil
1 tsp of red chilli powder
1 tsp of amchur powder
3 tsp of vinegar
salt to taste
METHOD
Heat 3 tbsp of mustard oil and
saute the corn niblets for 2-3
minutes. Mix in the crushed
chillies and fry for another minute.
Add the salt, amchur powder and
red chilli powder and mix well. Put
off the heat. In another pan heat
the remaining mustard oil and add
to the green chilli and corn
mixture. Allow the aachar to cool
to room temperature. Pour into
glass bottles and put the lid on the
jar. Keep in the sun for 2-3 days.
Stays good for 2-3 months. Try
the aachar with sandwiches.
GREEN
CHILLIES
WITH
MUSTARD
AND MINT
INGREDIENTS:
250 gm of thin green chillies
3 tsp of dry mustard powder
3 tsp of dry mint powder
4 tsp of lemon juice
3 cups of mustard oil
11/2 tsp of salt
METHOD
Divide the chillies into two
portion. One portion leave the
chillies whole and only make a slit
in each of the chillies and leave
aside. The other half of the chillies
crush coarsely and keep aside.
Heat 3 tbsp of the mustard oil and
fry both the crushed and the
whole chillies for 2 minutes. Put
off the heat and mix in the
51

Green chillies with
mustard and mint
powders, salt and lemon juice.
Mix well. Allow the aachar to cool
to room temperature. Pour into
glass bottles and put the lid on the
jar. Keep in the sun for 2-3 days.
Stays good for 4-5 months.
AMRA PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
200 gm of fresh green amra
3 cups of mustard oil
1/ tsp of turmeric powder
2
2 tsp of salt
For the spice powder:
1 tsp of cumin seeds – jeera
1 tsp of mustard seeds – sarso
1/ tsp of ajwain
4
2 dried red chillies
METHOD
Dry-roast the spices for the
spice powder and then grind into
a powder in a mixer. Keep aside.
Wash the amras, lightly
remove the skin and cut into four
quarters. Dry under the fan or in
the sun for a few hours so that all
Amra pickle
52
the moisture is evaporated.
Sprinkle salt and haldi powder
and keep aside, covered with a
clean muslin cloth for about 3-4
hours. Mix in the spice powder
and mix gently. Heat the
mustard oil in a kadhai till
smoky. Put off the heat and add
the spiced amras. Mix gently
and allow to cool to room
temperature. Fill into glass
bottles and tighten the lid. Keep
in the sun for 3-4 days for the
amras to ‘cook’ in the oil under
the heat of the sun. Stays good
for at least 3-4 months. Tastes
good with plain rice.
BLACK JAMUNS
STEWED
INGREDIENTS:
250 gm of kala jamun
150 gm of sugar
50 gm of broken cashew pieces
METHOD
Wash the jamuns and pat-dry
with a kitchen towel. Boil 300 ml
of water and add the sugar. Stir till
the sugar melt. Bring the sugar
syrup to boil and then lower the
heat. Add the jamuns and allow
these to simmer in the sugar
syrup for 3-4 minutes. Mix in the
cashew pieces and stir gently. Put
off the heat and allow to cool to
room temperature. Keep in a
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
bottle and leave in the fridge.
Serve 2-3 tsp with a few jamuns
and the sugar syrup on a scoop of
ice cream. Looks good and tastes
different. Also try serving it on a
slice of cheese cake.
STEWED FRESH
CHERRIES
INGREDIENTS:
300 gm of fresh cherries
3/ tsp of cinnamon powder
4
2 tsp of black pepper powder
150 gm of sugar
METHOD
Remove the stalks from the
cherries and wash these well.
Pat-dry with a towel. Boil 250 ml
of water. Add the sugar and stir
till the sugar melts. Mix in the
cinnamon powder. Bring the syrup
to boil till it begins to thicken
slightly – this should take around
3-4 minutes. Add the pepper
powder. Drop the cherries and
Black jamuns stewed
Stewed fresh cherries
allow these to boil in the
cinnamon sugar syrup for 4-6
minutes on low fire. Once the
syrup begins to thicken put off the
heat and allow the litchis to cool
to room temperature. Store in an
air-tight jar and keep in the fridge.
Serve a few cherries with a few
teaspoons of the syrup with
scoops of ice cream or a slice of
cheese cake or caramel pudding
or even kheer.
MANGO
PICKLE WITH
JAGGERY
INGREDIENTS:
500 gm of raw green mango
2 dried red chillies
1 tsp of kala jeera – onion seeds
2 tsp of red chilli powder
1 tsp of salt
For the paste:
4 tsp of tamarind paste
150 gm of jaggery
2 tsp of sugar
2 tsp of vinegar
METHOD
Wash the mangoes
and dry these with a
cloth. Do not peel. Cut the
mangoes into one inch-long
pieces with the skin. Boil 300 ml Jackfruit pickle
of water and add the whole
spices. First add the kernel and
allow this to boil in the water with JACKFRUIT
the spices for 2 minutes. Lower
the heat and mix in the mango PICKLE
pieces. Boil on low fire adding salt INGREDIENTS:
and chilli powder stirring from time 1 kg raw green jackfruit
to time. Once the mango skin 800 ml of mustard oil
begins to turn colour and the 1 tsp of haldi powder
mangoes are half tender add the salt to taste
paste. Mix all the ingredients i.e.
For the spice powder:
tamarind, jaggery, sugar, vinegar
1 tsp of saunf – aniseed
and blend well to obtain a paste.
2 dried red chillies
Add this to the mango mixture
2 cardamoms
and stir gently. Allow the
3 cloves
mangoes to simmer in this
jaggery mixture for further 3-4
1 tsp of mustard seeds
1/ tsp of onion seeds
minutes. Stir from time to time.
Once the syrup begins to thicken
2
METHOD
put off the heat and allow the Peel the jackfruit, discard the
skin and the seeds and cut into 1
chutney to cool to room
inch pieces. Boil 300-400 ml of
temperature. Store in air tight
water and add salt to taste. Drop
bottles. Stays good for almost a
the jackfruit pieces in boiling
month. When kept in the fridge it
water and allow to simmer for 3-4
can stay good for even 5-6
minutes. Drain out all the excess
months. Enjoy it with puris or
water and dry under the fan so
paranthans.
that all the moisture is
Mango pickle with jaggery
evaporated. Once dry sprinkle
more salt and haldi powder and
keep aside covered with a muslin
cloth for 3-4 hours.
Dry-grind all the ingredients
for the spice powder coarsely.
Keep aside. Heat the mustard oil
till smoky. Put off the heat and
cool slightly. Mix in the spice
powder and stir gently. Cool the
oil to room temperature and then
mix in the jackfruit pieces and mix
with a wooden spoon. Put into
glass jars. Fasten the lid and keep
in the sun for 4-5 days. Keep in a
cool dry place. This pickle stays
good for 4-5 months. Tastes good
with plain rice.
MIXED PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
100 gm carrots
12-14 lemon
100 gm of green chillies
50 gm of ‘dera’ round small
green balls used in pickles
200 gm of turnips – shalgam
salt to taste
800 ml of mustard oil
For the spice powder:
2 tsp of kala jeera – onion seeds
1/ tsp of hing powder
4
5 dried red chillies
1 tsp of mustard seeds
1 tsp of ajwain – carom seeds
1 tsp of amchur powder
salt to taste
METHOD
Dry-grind all the spices for the
spice powder. Keep aside in an
airtight container till time of use.
Peel the turnips and cut into
quarters. Scrape the carrots
lightly and cut into half-inch
pieces. Make slit in the green
Mixed pickle
54
chillies. Cut the lime into
quarters. Heat 400 ml of
water and add salt to
taste. Add the
shalgum pieces and
simmer in boiling
water for 1 minute.
Add the carrot pieces
and the ‘dera’ and
simmer for a further 2
minutes.
Put off the heat and pass
the vegetables through a strainer.
Dry under the fan or cover with a
muslin cloth and keep in the sun
for all the moisture to evaporate.
Heat 1 cup of mustard oil and add
the lemon pieces.
Add salt to taste and cover with
a lid. Cook the lemon on very low
fire for only 2-3 minutes. Mix in
the spice powder and stir gently
for another 2 minutes. Put off the
heat. Mix in the remaining
vegetables and stir gently.
Allow the pickle to cool to room
temperature and then place into
a glass bottle. Now heat the
remaining oil till smoky. Cool to
room temperature and pour into
the glass bottle over the pickle. If
the aachar is covered with oil the
chances of it spoiling are less.
Add salt to taste and then close
the lid. Keep in the sun for 4-5
days and consume it with any
meal. Stays good for as long as 5-
6 months.
LOTUS STEM
PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
800 ml of mustard oil
300 gm of lotus stem – bhey
For the spice powder:
11/2 tsp of saunf - aniseed
1/ tsp of kala jeera – onion
2
seeds
2 tsp of red chilli powder
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Lotus stem pickle
1/
2 tsp of mustard seeds
2 cloves
METHOD
Dry-roast all the spices and
cool to room temperature. Dry-
grind in a mixer to a coarse
powder.
Scrape the lotus stem gently
and cut into quarter-inch thick
pieces. Boil 300 ml of water and
add salt to taste. Put the lotus
stem pieces into the boiling water
and allow to simmer for 2-3
minutes. Put off the heat and
pass the lotus stem through a
strainer.
Dry under the fan or cover with
a muslin cloth and keep in the sun
for all the moisture to evaporate.
Heat 1 cup of mustard oil and add
the lotus stem pieces. Mix in the
spice powder and stir gently for
another 2 minutes. Put off the
heat.
Allow the pickle to cool to room
temperature and then place into
a glass bottle. Now, heat the
remaining oil till smoky. Cool to
room temperature and pour into
the glass bottle over the pickle. If
the aachar is covered with oil the
chances of it spoiling are less.
Add salt to taste and then close
the lid.
Keep in the sun for 4-5 days
and consume it with any meal.
Stays good for as long as 5-6
months.
BITTER GOURD
STUFFED PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
12-14 small karela – bitter gourd
300 ml of mustard oil
salt to taste
For the spice stuffing:
1 tsp of aniseed
1 tsp of carom seeds – ajwain
1/ tsp of kala jeera – onion
2
seeds
5-6 black pepper corns
1/ tsp of mustard seeds
4
50 gm piece of dried coconut –
copra
salt to taste
METHOD
Break the copra into small
pieces and together with the other
spices dry-roast in a pan till light
golden in colour. Put off the heat
and cool to room temperature.
Dry-grind in a mixer to a coarse
powder.
Wash the karelas and make a
slit into each of these and remove
all the seeds. Soak the karelas in
salted water for 1 hour and then
drain out all the water. Dry under
the fan or cover with a muslin
cloth and keep in the sun for all
the moisture to evaporate. Fill
each of the karelas with the
prepared spice powder.
Bitter gourd stuffed pickle
Heat 1 cup of mustard oil and
place the karelas in these. Fry
over medium heat turning once or
twice, and sprinkling a little more
salt on the karelas. Turn once or
twice and fry so that all the sides
of the karelas are light brown in
colour. Place these stuffed fried
karelas in a glass jar. Now, heat
the remaining oil till smoky. Cool
to room temperature and pour into
the glass bottle over the pickle.
The pickle is ready for
consumption. Will stay good for a
week or two if it is covered with
mustard oil. Turn it from time to
time.
CHOLE PICKLE
INGREDIENTS:
200 gm of kabuli chana
600 ml of mustard oil
salt to taste
spice powder
3 dried red chillies
1 tsp of amchur powder
1 tsp of jeera seeds
1/ tsp of hing powder
4 consumption. Will stay good for a
1/ tsp of mustard seeds
2
1/ tsp of saunf – aniseed
2
1 tsp of red chilli powder
2 cloves
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Chole pickle
METHOD
Dry-roast all the ingredients for
the spice powder. Cool and grind
coarsely. Soak the chanas in
water overnight. In salted water,
boil the chanas in a pressure
cooker till only a little soft. Do not
overcook.
The chanas should be hard to
touch..Drain out all the water. Dry
under the fan or cover with a
muslin cloth and keep in the sun
for all the moisture to evaporate.
Heat 1 cup of mustard oil and
place the boiled chanas in this.
Fry over medium heat turning
once or twice, and sprinkling a
little more salt.
Turn once or twice and fry so
that all the sides of the chanas
are light brown in colour. Mix in
the spice powder. Put off the heat
and place these in a glass jar.
Now, heat the remaining oil till
smoky.
Cool to room temperature and
pour into the glass bottle over the
pickle.
The pickle is ready for
week or two if it is covered with
mustard oil. Turn it from time to
time. Serve with kulchas or
baturas. We
55
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 or ages, references to the

F
Ajanta-Ellora caves have
been hyphenated. In fact, the
hyphen between these two
World Heritage sites covers
76 km. They have much in
common – and much more
that is different. The biggest
similarity is that both sets
have been hand-hewn out of
the volcanic basaltic formations of the
Sahyadri ranges of the Deccan trap –
a Scandinavian-derived term
referring to the step-like formation of
the volcanic deposits – and dated to
the Cretaceous era of the geological
time scale of some 65 million years
ago. One can actually glimpse the
channels near cave 32 through which
the volcanic lava once flowed. Due
to overheating, these channels have
a characteristic brownish-red colour.

ETERNAL ELLORA
Monumental marvels carved into the Deccan.
By Rajib Sen

View of some Buddhist caves.


The basaltic formation of the
Deccan is ideal for rock-hewing, the
technique widely understood during
ancient times. Depending upon the
nature and mineralogical content of
the lava flow, the rock formations
also varied in character and texture,
giving rise to various qualities like
coarse-grained and fine-grained
formations. The ancient builders at
Ellora particularly chose the fine-
grained formations of the Deccan
trap since it was ideal for their
purpose. What’s more, they also
traced the horizontal and vertical
joints in the rock formation to
minimise their labour and time during
excavation and rock splitting.
No less a similarity between the
work at Ajanta and Ellora is the fact
that the workers had nothing more
than rudimentary hammers and
chisels to work with, and that they
delved into virgin hillsides from the
top down and from the outside, in.
But there, the similarities end.
The biggest difference is that
there are almost no paintings in the
Ellora caves. The second is the time-
differential. While the 30-odd Ajanta
caves date back to 2 BC, the 34
Ellora caves were built between the
5th and 10th centuries when the
Chalukyas (553-753 AD) ruled the
Deccan.
Besides, the ones at Ajanta were
“lost” after the 7th century (till their
discovery in 1819), unlike those at
Ellora. That’s because, centuries
ago, the site was situated on the
ancient north-south trade route or the
dakshinapatha where the tiny
mountain village of Verul was a well-
known stopover for traders, priests
and pilgrims who have plied the route
to the western ports till today. Little
wonder then that, even now, the
caves are locally known as Verul Leni
– which was inevitably Anglicised to
Ellora.
However, in addition to the
sculpture-friendliness if the basaltic
character of the hillside, the ancient
wayfarers’ familiarity with the region
of Verul influenced their decision to
make their presence there more
lasting. That started with the
excavation of Buddhist chaityas or
halls of worship, and viharas or
monasteries. Soon, the area also
found favour with missionaries of
other faiths, and over the next five
centuries, Hindus and Jains also
carved out their temples in the rocks
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Graphic representation of the Ellora caves.
there. Thus, while the Ajanta works
were purely inspired by Buddhism, at
Ellora there are not only 12 Buddhist
caves (1-12), but also 17 of Hindu
(caves 13-29) and five (30-34) of Jain
origin, built next to each other along a
roughly straight, two-km stretch of flat
land (unlike the hilly ravines of
Ajanta), demonstrating the high level
of religious harmony prevalent at the
time.
Again, unlike the 105+km ride to
Ajanta from Aurangabad, Ellora is
just 28 km north of this district
headquarters in the Marathwada
region of Maharashtra.
The Buddhist caves: Created
between the fifth and seventh
centuries, these mostly consist of
monasteries, some quite large, multi-
storeyed buildings carved into the
mountain face, including separate
living and sleeping quarters, kitchens
and other rooms.
Some of these monastery caves
have shrines including carvings of the
Buddha, Bodhisatvas and saints. In
many of these caves, the skilled
sculptors had even tried to give the
stone the look of wood as seen in
cave 10.
69
 Cave 10, the best known of the The Jain caves: The Jain caves,
THE JAIN CAVES, Buddhist excavations at Ellora, is a
chaitya hall ( chandrashala ) or
built somewhere around 800 AD to
1000 AD, reveal specific dimensions
BUILT SOMEWHERE Vishwakarma cave, popularly known of Jain philosophy and tradition. They
as the "Carpenter's Cave". That’s reflect a strict sense of asceticism
AROUND 800 AD because, beyond its multi-storeyed and are not as large as the others.
TO 1000 AD, entry is a cathedral-like stupa hall But they present exceptionally
also known as chaitya, whose ceiling detailed art works. The most
REVEAL SPECIFIC has been carved to give the remarkable Jain shrines are the
DIMENSIONS OF impression of wooden beams. At the Chhota Kailash (cave 30), the Indra
heart of this cave is a 15 ft-high Sabha (cave 32) and the Jagannath
JAIN PHILOSOPHY statue of the Buddha seated in a Sabha (cave 33).
AND TRADITION. preaching posture.
Amongst other Buddhist caves, all
The Indra Sabha is a two-storeyed
shrine with a very fine carving of the
THEY REFLECT A of the caves from 1 to 9 are lotus flower on the ceiling. In another
monasteries. The last two caves, do cave, an imposing image of Ambika
STRICT SENSE OF tal (cave 11) and tin tal (cave 12), the yakshi (dedicated attendant deity)
ASCETICISM AND have three storeys. of Neminatha is seated on her
lion under a mango tree laden with
ARE NOT AS fruits.
LARGE AS THE All other Jain caves are also
characterised by intricate detailing.
OTHERS. BUT THEY Many of the structures had rich
PRESENT paintings on the ceilings – fragments
of which are still visible.
EXCEPTIONALLY
The Hindu caves: The Hindu
DETAILED ART caves were constructed between 500
WORKS. and 1000 AD and represent a
different style of creative vision and
execution skills. Some were of such
complexity that they required several
generations of planning and
coordination to complete.
The early caves (17-29) were
constructed during the Kalachuri
period, while the caves 15 and 16
were constructed during the
Rashtrakuta period.
Two of the most noteworthy caves
are the Dashavatara (cave 15), which
depicts the 10 avatars of Vishnu, and
the Ramesvara (21) which has
figurines of river goddesses Ganga
and Yamuna at the entrance, and the
Dhumar Lena (cave 29). On the back
wall of the front mandapa of the
Dashavatara is an inscription of a
grant of Dantidurga. Two other
caves, the Ravan ki Khai (14) and the
Nilkantha (22), also have several
sculptures.
But the one that is beyond
compare – and, indeed,
comprehension till it is actually visited
– is the stupendous Kailasha, of
which more in the next issue.
Close-ups of some Buddhist caves.
(To be continued)

70 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 MONSOON NECESSITATES
REMOVAL OF MOULD
uring rainy season one
D
should be aware of the
formation of mould in one’s
home. Mould is the surface
growth of fungus on damp
matter. The knowledge and
determination for its removal
will benefit your and your
family’s health, besides
giving an earthy and humid
smell. Exposure to mould can cause
cold-like symptoms, respiratory
problems at times leading to asthma,
nasal and sinus congestion, watery
eyes, sore throats, coughing and skin
irritations. Hence, it is not safe from
the health point of view to live in
houses with high mould levels. We
must therefore take urgent steps to
eradicate mouldy conditions from our
household premises.
The appearance of excessive
moisture can give way to mould
growth in our household premises
especially during the rainy spell.
Moisture seeping through walls and
FROM HOMES
Know the damage mould can do during the
rainy season. By NK Pant
floors is likely to
cause this damp
malady on walls and
carpeted area in the
house. It must be
remembered that
mould conditions
mostly occur under
cabinets and inside
walls. Also, there is a
likelihood that mould might
be growing unnoticed behind
pieces of furniture, especially placed
next to an outside wall.
PREVENT MOULD
GROWTH
Since mould grows on moist
materials, its growth is likely in areas
made soggy by water leaks, flooding,
humidity levels above about 70 per
cent and condensation. Any water-
logged area that was not completely
drained out and dried quickly is likely
to have mould.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Walls need to be scrubbed and
rapidly dried to prevent mould. Any
area that is stained from water should
be examined for mould problem.
Peeling paint may be an indication of
wet walls.
For the sake of maintaining a
healthy environment in our homes,
we must take steps to remove the
mould as a top priority. While doing
so, we must put on eye-protection,
rubber gloves and clothing
while on the cleaning job.
Mould can be removed
from hard surfaces
such as plastic,
glass, metal and
counter tops by
scrubbing with a
detergent. Some -
times, it may not be
possible to completely
remove mould from
porous surfaces such as
paper and carpet padding,
in which case such items should
be discarded.
After removal of the mould, the
area should be disinfected using a
bleach and water solution or another
disinfectant. We must provide ade-
quate ventilation during disinfecting.
Use fans and dehumidifiers or natural
ventilation that exchange inside air
with outside air. It may not be
possible to eliminate all moulds and
mould spores in the indoor
environment. However, mould growth
can be kept under check by
controlling moisture indoors. We
71
 A LIFT IN THE HOUSE
How about renaming the device “shift”?
he lift most dutifully uplifts
T
your body and in that
rhythmic movement and
acceleration, the soul follows
simultaneously. Don’t you
feel that ‘lift’ be renamed as
‘shift’ in consonance with its
exact function? When the
architects designed
multistory buildings for the
first time, they must have had in their
mind the limited scope of human
energy levels to reach higher floors of
the buildings which, of course, were
provided with suitable staircases. So
the idea of having a lift in the house
came into being as an alternative to
the staircase for convenience and
comfort.
But the nomenclature ‘lift’ given to
such a new technological device
does not seem to be appropriate.
Why the name ‘lift’? Lift literally
means to carry people or goods
74
upward or to higher levels. In other
words, there will be only an
ascending order and no descending
order whatsoever. Yet we see that a
lift moves both upwards and
downward. In my humble opinion I
feel that ‘lift’ should be renamed as
‘shift’ which involves movements both
up and down, which appears to be
more appropriate.
Since its original design it has
seen various technological develop-
ments in its manufacturing and
alterations in design and perfor -
mance. In modern times high-rise
buildings – mostly commercial
complexes and government offices –
have more than 20 floors. In such
buildings separate lifts are provided
floorwise – i.e., one lift up to the 3rd
or 4th floor, a second lift up to the
10th floor, a third lift up to the 20th
floor and so on. In such buildings
‘dependence on a lift is a fait
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
By K. M. Sharma
accompliced. However strong and
healthy a man might be he or she
can’t venture to climb even up to the
10th floor by the staircase. There
have been many cases of people
collapsing on the stairs when
reaching the 7th or 8th floor unaware
of the real strength of their hearts.
The author of this article faced such a
terrible situation while climbing the
building of The Hindustan Times and
was about to collapse when nearing
the 8th floor. Many times such
situations result in fatality.
The British provided lifts
extensively in almost all their
imposing buildings. In fact, the
concept of lift was invented during
the industrial revolution and readily
accepted universally by architects
and building contractors and became
the hallmark of the British era.
Prior to it – i.e. in the Hindu and
Muslim rule – no lift or any similar
device was ever used in any high-
rise building. Even high-rise buildings
like the Kutub Minar, Bulund
Darwaza, or Vijay Isthamb of Chittor
and other such buildings were
provided with straight and spiral
staircases and it was a fait
accompliced to use staircases for the
people visiting such buildings
comprising more than 100 steps.
Lifts are of various sizes which
differ as per the requirements in each
particular case. The lifts in hospitals
are sufficiently spacious to carry big
trollies with lots of goods and visitors
and the stretchers to carry operated
and sick patients. Similarly, in high-
rise buildings where there are a huge
conglomeration of various offices,
government as well as corporate, the
lifts are as big as a small room.
But the maintenance of such lifts
is a big problem and seldom taken
up seriously. In MCD lifts one has to
think twice to enter and you can see
the “Lift out of order” board up quite
often. Still, Otis lifts are famous for
their immaculate performance.
Breakdowns: This new technolo-
gical development is proving a boon
to mankind the world over. But, when
a lift is stuck, the scene becomes
most troublesome for the users and,
if it is summer and the electricity is off
and the lift is full of people, it
becomes most traumatic. This
nightmare shakes the confidence of
the users and frightens them into not
using lifts as far as possible. The
impact of such a terrible situation on
some individuals is so grave that they
usually develop a disease called
claustrophobia.
I was also involved in such a
terrible situations when the lift got
stuck and, on one occasion, I was all
alone in the lift and did not know
much about handling the emergency
situation. These incidents dampened
my spirits to such an extent that I
used to become horrified at the
glimpse of a lift and would like to
tramp up the staircase.
When the lift suffers a breakdown,
its repairs are equally dangerous and
life-threatening.
As regards the safety measures in
the lift, the following features should
be worked at:
● More persons than the allotted
capacity should not be allowed
inside.
● As an alternative system to
power failure, a battery-operated
system should be provided in the lift.
● Some standby measures
should be readily available in an
emergency like a rope, motor etc.
Case I: The lift in a multi-storey
building suffered a breakdown and it
was stuck in the shaft between the
floors. The lift mechanic managed to
climb the roof of the lift in the shaft
and started checking the problem. In
the meantime, the lift started moving
up with speed and the mechanic got
crushed between the roof of lift and
the ceiling the shaft. It was really a
very horrifying death.
Case II: The lift got stuck in the
shaft between the floors and the
mechanic had to get into the lower
vacant portion of the shaft for
necessary repairs. The lift was up the
shaft. As the mechanic started taking THEY ASSERT THAT
corrective measures the lift suddenly UP TO THE 4TH
started moving down where the
mechanic was working. The lift came FLOOR PEOPLE MUST
down with a thud, crushing the USE THE STAIRCASE
mechanic’s body totally flat. Death
was inescapable and instantaneous. AS CLIMBING THE
STAIRS PROVIDES
Case III: Two or three persons
were coming down in a lift. Somehow A GOOD AND
the lift got stuck and stopped near ESSENTIAL EXERCISE
the exit gate. By pressing this and
that button as a trial and error they TO THE LEGS AND
managed to bring the lift to the exit KNEE JOINTS. THIS
opening. Still the door did not open
automatically. They tried to force EXERCISE OF
open the door. CLIMBING THE
As the door opened a little, one
man tried to rush out through the
STAIRCASE PROVIDES
cramped opening and, in the FULL PROTECTION
meantime, his leg got caught in the
door which closed abruptly and the
FROM THE
lift started moving down, thereby ONSLAUGHT OF
tearing the body and the fellow died a
miserable death, and nobody could
PAINFUL BONE
extend any sort of assistance to DISEASES LIKE
snatch him from the jaws of death.
TV channels did telecast this horrible
OSTEOPOROSIS
scene in all their news bulletins. AND ARTHRITIS.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 75
 Death due to suffocation in lift
due to breakdown has also been
reported several times. These
are not mere stories but two
incidents that have actually been
witnessed in dismay by me.
A software engineer living in
a group housing society had
pushed the button of the lift on
the VI floor only to realise there
was no electricity supply. He
started climbing the staircase but
when he reached the 3rd floor
the electricity supply resumed
and the lift door at 3rd floor
opened. He stepped inside
assuming the lift to be there but
he fell through the shaft. The lift
was there but on some other floor.
He plunged from the fourth floor to
his death.
Accidents in lifts are usually taking
place though with limited frequency.
All investigations in lift accidents
inviable lead to a conclusion is that
the lift was not fitted with the
additional features. Automatic safety
device which is primarily the duty of
the owner of the buildings to ask for it
& next is the poor maintenance.
Result Nishant Sharma (27) who was
to reach his office at 10th floor got
stuck up in his lift due to lower failure.
On a hurry the occupants slid open
the lift door as the wanted to reach
office in time. But while Nishant tried
to come out the life got reactivalied
and doors were shut. His head was
caught in between the doors. As the
lift moved upward, his head hit the
concrete frame and his body
remained in the lift until the lift
automatically stopped. He sustained
serious head injuries resulting in
extensive blood clotting which
hindered blood and oxygen supply in
his brain. According to Dr’s attending
on him the ICU of Antemies Hospital
his chances of survival were black.
This accident was a clear case of
negligence on the part of DLF who
owns the building Investigations are
on.
Pleasurable moments: But it is
not that every time a lift happens to
be a harbinger of death and
destruction. On the contrary, it
76
provides pleasurable moments as
well. Lovers when alone in the lift, get
a good opportunity for embracing and
kissing. Those who work in offices
and who don’t get any privacy for
lovemaking, immediately jump into
the lift and release their pent-up
emotions. This happens very much
in multi-storey group housing
societies as well.
Lifts are usually closed and
provide a complete privacy and
stimulating opportunity and lovers
utilise this situation to the maximum.
Lifts going up and down with a
rhythm resonate the vibes of love
seekers. In it there is nobody’s loss
but the lovebird’s clamour is suitably
rewarded. But this relief is not
available in the transparent lifts used
in the outer portions of buildings. Such
lifts are mostly in use in malls and
other big industrial establishments.
Lift operators: In most of the lifts
in bigger establishments, a lift
operator is invariably provided to
operate the lift as he is specifically
trained for this purpose. It is seen
that many people suffer from lift
phobia and will not use a lift when
they are alone. So to such people are
extended help by a lift operator.
But the life of a lift operator in
general is very humdrum, dull and
monotonous. The poor fellow has to
sit on a stool or clumsy chair
throughout the day ferrying different
types of people up and down. The
operators suffer from the monotony
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
syndrome. Sometimes, their feet
get swollen. The whole
personality of lift operators turns
that of into introverts.
Their relaxation options
remain restricted to listening to
music, reading a book or
thoroughly and repeatedly
reading the newspaper. But for
how long and how much? Mental
fatigue usually creeps in. But still
many people are engaged in this
employment braving the odds.
Medical advice: Except for
the people living in high-rise
buildings, doctors seldom advise
people to use lifts. They assert
that up to the 4th floor people must
use the staircase as climbing the
stairs provides a good and essential
exercise to the legs and knee joints.
This exercise of climbing the
staircase provides full protection from
the onslaught of painful bone
diseases like osteoporosis and
arthritis. People up to 45 years must
invariably use the staircase up to the
4th floor. It will provide the required
strength to their legs and thigh
muscles.
Aged people and persons with
weak hearts, of course, should avoid
using a staircase as it may create
serious uncontrollable palpitation of
the hearts leading to cardiac arrest
or heart attack. My office was at the
4th floor and I never used the lift to
reach my chamber and always used
the staircase with no inconvenience
at all. My action and style kept others
in good humour.
Legal position: An aggrieved
citizen or an NGO or a society can
file a criminal case against the lift
company and also the builders and
developers and the owner of the
building in case of death or grave
injury or else a case of negligence
can be filed in accordance with the
provisions of consumer act and other
civil act and seek damages for
deficiency of service and using-sub-
standard material in the lift.
Information can also be sought by
invoking the provisions of the right to
Information Act. We
BOO M B AY
B O M B AY F I L M D O M
FILMDOM
T he great news is that the two
month long stand-off between the
owners of multiplexes and the United
Producers and Distributors’ Forum
(UPDF) has come to an end.
Although the agreement is somewhat
more in favour of the Forum, the
important thing is that the show biz
will go on, as it should.
fter a few Hollywood stars
A shooting for Hindi films in
Bollywood, now two Hollywood stars
— Amalia and Stephen have gone
right upto Ludhiana (Punjab) and its
neighbouring villages to shoot for
‘Heartland’.
et another proof that Bollywood
Y is catching the fancy of foreign
artists after shooting for an item
number with Akshay Kumar for Blue.
Australian singer Kylie Minaque now
also wants to act in Hindi films. Isn’t
that great?
Akshay Kumar in ‘Blue’.
Amitabh - did the right thing.
eacting to racial attacks on Indian
R students in Australia, Amitabh
Bachchan did the minimal right thing
in turning down the honour the
Queensland University wanted to
confer on him.
It is gratifying that just 12 months
after Reliance Big Entertainment
announced its Hollywood foray at the
Cannes Festival last year, at least 20
Riya Sen plays the role of an oversensitive girl in ‘Paying Guests’.
Emraan Hashmi loves different roles.
projects are in various stages of
script writing.
mraan Hashmi (of Raaz — The
E mystery continues fame) is a
believer in doing different kind of role
to grow as an actor. He is also doing
an action thriller: Once Upon A Time
in Mumbai, a Gangsters’ story based
in Mumbai in the 1980s.
B ombay Filmdom can well be
proud that the film Zor Lagga Ke
Haiya revolving around environment
and its protection produced by the
Talrejas and directed by Girish Girija
Joshi has reaped a rich harvest of
international awards at various world
film festivals.
ilating on her role in Paying Guests,
D Riya Sen says she plays Arpita, an
oversensitive and melodramatic girl
who’s quick to cry even if her boyfriend is
somewhat late in arriving to meet her.
 Is Riya Sen
wearing cross
around her
neck?
 eacting to racial attacks on Indian
R students in Australia, Amitabh
Bachchan did the minimal right thing
in turning down the honour the
Queensland University wanted to
confer on him.
ilms vying with one another for
F earliest release include Kambakht
Ishq (starring Akshay Kumar and two
hai’s film Paying Guests is a fun
G film revolving around a host of
actors and their sweet and sour
experiences as PGs (short form of
Paying Guests) in big cities. Celina
Jaitley who has stayed as PG at 8
places in Kolkata describes her
experiences as a mix of absurd to
sweet.

Hollywood stars, Paying Guests amir Khan (whose aversion for

produced by Subhash Ghai and
Emraan Hashmi’s Raftaar and Tum
Mile.
A awards is well known) and
Rekha received the Raj Kapoor
Pratibha Puraskar Awards at the 46th
Marathi Chitrapat State Awards at the
Shivaji Stadium in Pune. Any Danny Boyle – Slumdog Millionaire fame.
particular reason for this exception, poet lyricist Javed Akhtar unveiled
Aamir? Lata Mangeskar in her own voice
written by Nasreen Munni Kabir was
anny Boyle (yes, of Slumdog
D Millionaire fame) was again in
Mumbai recently to settle the housing
hardly a surprise. The reason? Lata
is only one of the few living legends.

issue for the film’s child stars. He
also attended a party at a 5-star
hotel. A couple of children may get a
roof over their head.
urning up of quite a few playback
T singers to greet Lata Didi when
ome people have all the luck in
S the world. Like film-maker
Aashwin Kumar, for instance his
debut feature film The Forest was
premiered at Cannes. How many
film-makers can claim such a
distinction?

Aamir Khan.

Celina Jaitly in
‘Paying Guests’.
 Sharmila
Tagore
looking cute
at 62.
ith some people duty comes
W first, as it should Sharmila
Tagore, a jury member at this year’s
Cannes Film Festival liked the
gorgeous’ Brad Pitt but refrained from
meeting him. So what if Sharmila is
62, she too has a heart.
elina Jaitly may not have hit the
C big leage yet, but she is not
wanting in dedication. Example?
Hardly had she finished shooting for
Accident on Hill Road at 5 a.m. who
she was called by Subhash Ghai to
be with other artistes of Paying
Guests at 6 a.m. And she made it.
S lumdog Millionaire star Freida
Pinto overtook Sonam Kapoor in
being the latest celebrity from
India to join the line up of cosmetic
giant L’oreal, Paris. Congrats, Miss
Pinto.
Freida Pinto of Slumdog Millionaire is
now celebrity.
he hit pair of Jodha Akbar and
T Doom 2 Aishwarya Rai and
Hrithik Roshan is all set to work
together again in Sanjay Leela
Bhansali’s next film Guzarish, the film
with which Sanjay Leela Bhansali is
turning a music director too! Wow.
ll that glitters is not gold was
A proved once again after Karan
Johar’s Dharma Productions was
slapped with a US $ 150,000 law suit
in Philadelphia after it reportedly
failed to pay the local workers and
actors hired for its thriller Jihaad
Right, Mr Johar?
F ilm folks who don’t get sufficient
inner peace in films, get it
elsewhere. Like Divya Dutta recently
visited the Bhram Kumari Centre,
Mumbai, to find inner peace and the
truth of life. Working for street
Divya Dutta is searching
for inner peace.
Hrithik Roshan and Aishwarya Rai -
a hit pair.
children gives her another sign of
peace. Good.
f Danny has given a convincing
I portrayal in Frozen (Hindi), there is
hardly any surprise, for, he has given
similar performances in umpteen
films in the last more than two
decades. In fact, Danny wanted to be
a singer, but destiny had other plans
for him to make a niche of his own as
an actor.
f Shruti Hassan (who is going to
I give music for Kamal Hassan’s re-
make of A wednesday) is reportedly
loaded with talent, we should better
believe it, for, she’s the daughter of
Kamal Hassan, of Chachi 420 and Ek
Duje Ke Liye fame. And she’s pretty
too.
f Chandrachood Singh is making a
Icomeback with Maruti Mera Dost,
he is indeed welcome, for he is a
damn good-looking young man. We
wish him better luck this time.
aj Kapoor was not called the
R original showman for nothing.
Good sense of music was his forte.
No wonder, all his films had great
music and made most of his films —
Barsaat, Awara, Sangam and Bobby
super duper hits. He did Bombay
Filmdom proud.
– Deepak Puri.
 MOTHER-LOVE
WHEN DOES IT
FIRST STRIKE? But…what do you feel? According
to Indian films and romantic books,
the new mother at once feels
overwhelmed by love for the mite she
had just brought into the world. She
is changed for ever and the baby
becomes the centre of her life. She
Three women loses her own identity as she takes
on the mantle of a mother. But is this
divulge when they how it actually happens? Let’s ask
some women about how and when
they were filled with mother-love!
first experienced
mother-love and A GRADUAL
DEVELOPMENT
when they first “It happened very slowly for me!”
confessed Kavya with a laugh. “I
realised that their didn’t feel love overwhelm me the
first time I set eyes on my son!”
bond with their baby Kavya had an eventless
pregnancy and gave birth normally
was stronger, more and fairly easily. “I never felt
nauseous and didn’t put on too much
wonderful and more weight,” she told me. “In fact, when I
ou have gone through nine told a friend that I was expecting

Y
months of pregnancy and
the trauma of childbirth for
the first time. How did you
feel during it all? It is
common for women to feel
excited, curious, apprehen-
sive, worried and even
afraid during pregnancy.
They remain involved with
themselves and what is happening in
their bodies. They are looked after
lovingly by their husbands, parents,
in-laws and even neighbours and
friends.
As their delivery dates near, their
excitement and apprehension grow.
What will happen? Will they give birth
to a son or a daughter? Will the pain
enduring than any
other in their lives!
An eye-opener for
all women.
By Kasturi Rangachari
be unbearable? Childbirth is
supposed to be a rebirth – will they
survive it?
Labour starts, reaches
crescendo and the baby is born. It’s a
boy! It’s a girl! Everyone waiting
anxiously, explodes with joy! You
have become a mother!
when I was five months pregnant,
she didn’t believe me because my
stomach was absolutely flat!”
Kavya had gone to stay at her
mother’s place – which was in the
same metropolis as her sasural –
when she was about eight months
pregnant, she continued to work till
two days before giving birth. “I’d have
gone to work the next day too, but I
began spotting and the doctor told
me to stay in bed,” she says a trifle
boastfully!
a This young 25-year-old was in
labour for only an hour and then her
son popped out, weighing a healthy
31/2 kilos! “The pain stopped so
miraculously!” she remembers with a

82 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008

smile. “And everyone congratulated “I at once got out of bed and told
me and I felt so good! It was as if I the nurses that I wanted to learn how
had completed a task I had been to look after the baby and they
given, well and efficiently. I felt as I obligingly taught me how to bathe,
did when my boss patted me on the soothe and change the baby; how to
back for successfully completing a bundle him up and how to put him to
project! “The doctor held up my son sleep.
and showed him to me and I smiled, “From the day I went home, I
but I was more interested in closing began to do everything for the baby. I
my eyes and letting go – going to began to feel this tremendous sense
sleep even as the nurses worked on of responsibility for the little mite. This
me and cleaned me up!” was because of something my doctor
The feeling of well-being told me before I went home.
continued over the next few days ‘Remember, Kavya,’ she said,
while Kavya stayed in the upmarket ‘everything that happens to this baby
nursing home where she had given will be because of you. If he’s healthy
birth to her baby. The baby was kept and happy, it’ll be because of you, if
in the nursery and brought to Kavya he falls ill, doesn’t sleep at night, is
only at feed times, so that she could cranky or if he doesn’t have a good
rest and recuperate after the trauma appetite, it’ll be because of you! You
of childbirth. are totally responsible for him!’ got up, she realised, and she waited
“Feeding my baby…was…a “Yes, I felt responsible for my son for someone to go and pick him up.
strange experience! A bit of an whom we named Shresht, but … The whimper was repeated and she
ordeal, actually, because I didn’t love… mother-love? I don’t think I felt turned off the gas and went through
know how to go about it!” recalls it then!” the drawing room towards the
Kavya with a laugh. “I felt…oh, I don’t The weeks passed and the day bedroom where the baby lay.
know! Strange?” Kavya was to go back to her marital “What’s the matter?” asked her
But the strangeness disappeared home arrived. Her in-laws came in mother-in-law.
when hubby Dhanush and other the evening to take her and their “Where are you going?” asked her
members of the family and grandson home. She was mother.
friends came during visiting “That was packed and ready and “To pick up Shresht,” she replied.
hours. All of them oohed baby Shresht was “Let him sleep,” said her father.
and aahed over the baby the moment sleeping in the bedroom. “Don’t disturb him.”
and Kavya again felt filled when I really As Kavya’s parents and “He has got up,” Kavya replied. “I
with achievement and felt like a her in-laws laughed and heard him cry.”
pride. chatted in the drawing “None of us heard him,” said her
“But, you know, I hardly
mother! The room, she went into the mother-in-law blankly.
felt that the baby was moment kitchen to make tea. “I heard him,” Kavya replied.
mine!” Kavya confessed when I was Suddenly she heard a As she walked towards the door
thoughtfully. “I hardly whimper. Shresht had she heard her father-in-law say
flooded with
thought of him after he was solemnly, “That’s mother-love for
taken away to the nursery. love for my you. A mother instinctively hears her
I thought more about the baby,” Kavya child even when others don’t!”
problems of feeding him finished “That was the moment when I
than of him! really felt like a mother! The moment
“But I suddenly felt softly. when I was flooded with love for my
terribly worried when the baby,” Kavya finished softly.
doctor told my mother that we could
go home the next day. This was
because it suddenly struck me that
MOTIVATED BY
from the next day I would be REMORSE
expected to take care of that little “I was a self-centred, spoilt brat!”
mite! Of course, my mother would be admitted Aparna when I asked her
there to help me but I was planning to about her experience of becoming a
go back home to my husband and in- mother. “My parents, especially my
laws in about a month! I couldn’t be mother, always pampered me – I am
dependent on my mother-in-law an only child – and they continued to
there! do so after I got married and during

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008 83

my pregnancy. I don’t think that I they were just relieved that their “I actually felt a little ashamed of
gave my baby a thought. It was all darling daughter had come through myself and got up and quietly went
about I, me, myself! Why, I came to the ordeal safely. As for the baby, with my mother and father to the
my mother’s place for my delivery well, they would look after her and nursing home. My in-laws and my
when I was only in the fourth month she would pick up! husband were already there. They
of my pregnancy – so that I could be But things didn’t work out that were all staring through a glass into
indulged, coddled and cosseted! ” easy. Aparna and the baby went the neonatal ICU. My mother-in-law
Aunts, uncles and her in-laws, home four days after the infant had was silently weeping and Nikhil had
frowned and tut-tutted disapprovingly, been born, but within a day, Aparna’s clenched his jaws as if he were trying
but Aparna’s besotted parents mother suspected that the baby had to prevent his tears from escaping.
continued to spoil and mollycoddle jaundice and took her to the doctor. “I too went and stood by the glass
their darling daughter. “I am lazy and Tests were conducted and jaundice and stared through it. A tiny infant
so I didn’t want to go for the walks was confirmed. The doctor at once wearing just a minuscule nappy lay
the doctor said I should go for and had the baby admitted to the asleep on a sheet of some kind of
my parents didn’t force me to,” neonatal ICU. glass. The infant was blindfolded and
reminisced Aparna. “I hate greens “Aparna must come and stay in a her hands were lightly tied to posts
and most vegetables, so they didn’t room in the nursing home so that she on either side of the bed. An IV
make me eat them. I dislike milk, so can feed the baby,” the doctor said. needle was taped into the back of the
they didn’t insist that I drink it! I just “But, I was reluctant to go to the infant’s tiny hand. A series of
sat around watching TV and gorging nursing home,” Aparna revealed. fluorescent lights were placed both
on oily snacks and they watched me “Though I had enough milk, I found above, below and to the sides of the
with a smile! I don’t think nursing painful because baby. And that baby was mine!
that they saw past me! Aparna’s of the discomfort of all “My father-in-law saw me and
”My husband Nikhil did those Caesarean stitches! turned and hugged me. ‘She’ll be all
try to talk to me about my
baby – a girl So I asked my mother if I right,’ he muttered. I gazed at my
responsibilities towards – was born really had to go and feed baby, at the needle running into the
the child I was going to very under- the baby. Couldn’t she be hand that was like a doll’s hand and
bring into the world, but I weight and given a bottle? felt…strange…
just pouted and told him “For the first time in my “Nikhil turned to me. ‘Let’s go and
not to be a bore!” weak. “That’s life my mother glared at talk to the doctor,’ he said quietly. He
Aparna went into labour because me! ‘No, she can’t be didn’t ask me how I was and,
nearly three weeks early Aparna didn’t given a bottle! Get up and surprisingly, I did not mind.
and her parents rushed come with me!’ she “The doctor was still angry with
her to the nursing home. eat properly groaned out through me. She ignored me and addressed
Labour was prolonged and and take clenched teeth. only Nikhil. She told him that many
bad. “I hadn’t imagined exercises as newborn babies develop jaundice
that it would be so painful! and that their skin then looks yellow.
she should
Even now when I think of This happens within days of the birth,
it...” she leaves her have. but the yellow tinge is usually slight
sentence incomplete and and it disappears within a few days.
shudders at the recollection of those No treatment is then needed.
hours. “My parents couldn’t bear to “The jaundice with its yellow tinge
hear my cries and begged the doctor is caused by excess bilirubin in the
to do a Caesarean. The doctor at first baby’s skin,” she explained. “Small
told them that it wasn’t necessary amounts of bilirubin are found in
and that I would have a normal everyone’s blood. It is released into
delivery if only I would cooperate a the bloodstream when too much of it
little, but later, when I just wouldn’t is produced and it is then stored in
bear down and kept screaming, and tissues. The bilirubin is carried by the
my parents kept begging, she gave in bloodstream to the liver where it is
and did one, after giving me eventually excreted from the body.
anaesthesia.” “Bilirubin is produced and
Aparna’s baby – a girl – was born released into the bloodstream when
very under-weight and weak. “That’s red blood cells are broken down.
because Aparna didn’t eat properly Newborn babies have a high number
and take exercises as she should of red blood cells so a lot of bilirubin
have during her pregnancy,” the is produced and this then enters the
doctor told her parents sternly, but bloodstream. Since a newborn baby’s

84 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008

liver is immature, it cannot process
the bilirubin quickly and so it remains
in the bloodstream. It is then
deposited in tissues and the skin of
the baby becomes yellow.
“We don’t worry if the baby is a
full-term baby and the levels of
bilirubin peak at five to 12 mg/dL
within a few days of birth and then
start to fall,” the doctor told Nikhil.
“But your baby is slightly pre-born
and is definitely underweight. Her
bilirubin level is 15 and it hasn’t
started to fall even though she is five
days old. In fact, I suspect that it is
going to rise farther.”
Aparna heard Nikhil swallow
nervously. “Is the baby in any danger,
doctor?” he asked.
“No. None of the other factors that
can lead to complications seem to be
present. But your baby is weak and
this will weaken her further.”
“What treatment is she receiving,
doctor?” it was again Nikhil who
spoke. Aparna couldn’t speak. A
deep sense of guilt had filled her. It
was her selfishness and immature
stupidity that had led to her daughter
being born weak and underweight!
“We have already placed bilirubin
reduction lights over and below the
baby and to her sides,” the doctor
explained. “This light will help the
baby get rid of the bilirubin that is just
under the surface of the skin. We
have placed a mask over the baby’s
eyes to prevent exposure to the
bright light and are giving the baby
an intravenous drip to ensure
nourishment and also to prevent
dehydration.”
“I continued to be silent even after
we went back to our vigil outside the
neonatal ICU,” remembered Aparna
in a brooding voice. “My stitches
troubled me but for once I didn’t
complain or demand attention.
Everyone there had almost forgotten
me and no one fussed over me –
and, for perhaps the first time in my
life, it didn’t upset me. I was called
in twice to feed the baby and it was
only after that that a nurse came and
told my mother that I should be taken
to the room that had been booked for
me so that I could rest. When the
baby needed to be fed, they would
send for me, she told us.
“My mother blinked and looked at
me. I understood that she had really
forgotten about me and that she had
been totally occupied with gazing at
her granddaughter and worrying
about her. But I didn’t mind at all.
“That day, in spite of the bilirubin
reduction lights, my daughter’s count
went up to 22. The doctor then
decided that she had to be given a
blood transfusion. I could not stay in
my room and rest. I repeatedly got
up and somehow managed to walk
to the lift and go down to the neonatal
ICU. There I would join the rest of the
family in their vigil. After some time,
someone would notice me and insist
that I go back to my room. And after
some time I would come down
again!”
Aparna gazed into the distance as
she told me all this. She was lost in
her memories of that agonising day.
“The doctors and the nurses drew
back the curtains of the window as
we watched the baby through when
they started the blood transfusion,
but later they drew them and we
could not see her. She lay absolutely
still. Was she asleep or unconscious,
I wondered. The transfusion was
being given through her navel, where
the umbilical cord had just been cut a
few days earlier. I suddenly
remembered that I hadn’t been called
to feed her for quite some time.
“I began to tremble. My baby must
be in such pain and I couldn’t even
hold her and console her! And all her
pain was because of me; because I
hadn’t taken care of her when she
had been in my womb! I bit my lips
but I could not keep down my sobs.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008
They burst out of my mouth and I
began to wail!
“It was at that moment that I
understood what being a mother was
all about. At that moment I felt a
wave of love so intense that it left me
dazed, sweep into my heart!”
Aparna’s baby recovered and is
today, at the age of eight months, a
roly-poly, active, smiling and gurgling
bundle of mischief. “She’s my life!”
says Aparna, but she adds more
soberly, “But I won’t let myself dote
on her to such an extent that I do her
more harm than good!”
SOMEONE ELSE’S
TRAUMA
“I lost my husband in an accident
just three weeks after we got
married,” said Tej softly. “I was just
19 then and about a month and a half
later, the doctor told me that I was
pregnant.”
Tej’s story is a strong argument
against astrology. When her parents
had set about trying to find a groom
for their only daughter, they had
insisted on the matching of
horoscopes. Several potential
bridegrooms were rejected because
their family astrologer told them that
the boy’s horoscope didn’t match
their daughter’s. When he finally told
them that Ved Prakash’s horoscope
was ideal for Tej, they had happily
gone ahead and splurged heavily on
their daughter’s wedding. Then
tragedy struck.
Tej gave a twisted smile. “I initially
thought that my period was
postponed because of the trauma I
had undergone, but my
grandmother’s experienced eye
noticed something different about me
and she told my mother to take me to
the doctor. The doctor told me that I
was pregnant and I understood his
words. But I had no nausea and I
didn’t feel pregnant.”
Tej’s parents and two elder
brothers had brought Tej home after
Ved Prakash’s funeral rites had been
completed and the news of the
pregnancy caused great
consternation. “My family had already
begun to whisper amongst
85
themselves that I should have encouraged her to make friends and Nagapatinam district of Tamil Nadu
another chance for happiness… that I to take part in college activities and and help in the government camps to
should remarry…and the news that I Tej began to take part in debates and which homeless and traumatised
was pregnant was a bombshell! to be an active member of the victims of the tsunami were flocking.
“Both my elder brothers wanted college’s social service club. Tej went with the group.
me to have an abortion…but…my By this time Jalaja was two years “We distributed what we had
grandmother wouldn’t hear of it. Ved old. A cute, smiling and active child, brought and tried to help the people
had been the only son of his parents she was doted on by the whole in the camp we went to as much as
and she said that it would be a sin to family. “I loved her too – as much as I we could,” remembers Tej. “Plenty of
wipe out his family by killing his child. loved my niece and three nephews,” help was pouring in and food,
Finally, after a lot of discussion says Tej. clothing and shelter wasn’t really the
everyone agreed that she was right. Tej’s brothers began to seriously main problem for those people. It was
No one asked me what I wanted and talk about her remarriage and started dealing with the loss of family
even if they had, I don’t think that I to look for a suitable bridegroom. members, neighbours and friends
would have known what to say. I was “We’ve decided to put an ad in the that almost all of them faced.
numb, totally numb. My brain...my papers,” Tej heard her eldest brother “It was agonising for us to just
heart…were both numb.” tell her parents. “It’ll say that Tej is a hear their stories what must they
Tej hardly remembers how she widow with a child, but will make it have been feeling? What would a
got through her pregnancy. Her clear that the child is not her woman who had lost her husband
brothers insisted that she continue responsibility.” and three children be going through?
with her education. She had left “Yes,” chimed in her other brother. Or a young child who was suddenly
college after her second year to get “It’ll say that she is a widow with one an orphan? Or a girl who had lost all
married and her brothers decided child, but with no liabilities.” her siblings?
that she should finish her graduation So Jalaja was a liability, but not And what could we say to these
privately. Passively she agreed and her liability! Tej turned and walked people to lessen their pain? Nothing!
took out her books and began to away. The tsunami which shocked All we could do was to cry with them
study again. the world and devastated many and share their agony. Listen to them
Tej’s pregnancy continued countries, struck a few weeks later. and share their grief.
normally and eight months As news poured in of “Because I had had some training
after the death of her Because many villages and coastal in counselling, I was attached to a
husband, she gave birth to I had had areas in Andhra Pradesh psychiatrist who was counselling
a baby girl. some training and Tamil Nadu being traumatised tsunami victims. I took
“I was weak and hardly ravaged, the social notes as she counselled people, and
had any milk and the baby in counse- service club of Tej’s even talked to some people, myself
was put on baby food lling, I was college swung into action when she was busy.
within days of birth,” attached to a collecting essentials and “One day, a woman belonging to
recalls Tej. “And…my raising funds for the the fishing community, a woman who
sisters-in-law took over her
psychiatrist victims. It was also had lost her whole family, came and
care. They looked after her who was decided that some began pouring out her grief to me.
completely and even kept counselling members of the club ‘Four of my children were playing on
her during the night. I would go to the the beach when the tsunami struck,’
traumatised
didn’t try to feed her, bathe she told me.
her, put her to sleep – did tsunami ‘They were swept far out to sea
nothing for her! I didn’t victims. by the very first wave. But my
even take an interest in husband, myself and our youngest
choosing her name. It was my mother child were at the shops on the other
who named her Jalaja.” side of the road bordering the beach
Tej’s sisters-in-law had two and though we too were carried
children each and were experienced along by the retreating waves, we
care-givers, while Tej was still were pushed against a tree and
listless, lost and grief-stricken. “I managed to hold on to it.
didn’t feel like a mother at all,” she “‘Waves pounded us and we
admits. “And that’s the way my family watched men, women and children
wanted it. They had not dropped their being swept past us. Suddenly, my
plan to get me remarried.” youngest child who was just seven,
Tej graduated and then joined lost hold of the branch he was
regular college to do her clinging to and was pulled away by
postgraduation. Her family the current. Both my husband and I

86 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008

at once jumped into the water to save
him – and all three of us were
dragged under. I couldn’t breathe and
lost consciousness. But when I
recovered consciousness, I found
myself alive because I was wedged
against a rock. My husband and my
youngest boy had however been
swept away!’
“The woman began to weep wildly
as if she were mad. ‘Why did I
survive to suffer like this?’ she wept.
‘Why didn’t I die too?’
“I sat frozen, picturing the scene.
Till the tsunami had struck, most of
us hadn’t even known what one was.
Even fisher folk hadn’t. The huge
waves the tsunami brought must
have looked like the wrath of god
falling on mankind to them! And yet,
both this woman and her husband
had, without a second thought,
jumped into that maelstrom to rescue
their child!
“But…they hadn’t jumped in to
save other people or even other
children! Then the instinct for self-
JOKES
Principal to a three-year-old boy who
was seeking admission in a convent:
Well done, my child. Now what are the
names of your parents?
Boy: Mummy and daddy.
* * * black while your sister’s is brown?
Customer: I can’t eat such a rotton
fish. Call your manager.
Waiter: It’s no use, sir, he won’t eat
it either.
* * * me, miss. I’m looking for a book
Teacher: Now, Gopi, tell me frankly,
do you say prayers before eating?
Gopi: No, sir. I don’t have to. My
mother is a good cook.
* * * A woman rang up her insurance
Politician: “Did your paper say I
was a liar and a scoundrel?”
Editor: “It did not.”
Politician: “Well, some paper in
this town said so.”
Editor: “It may have been another
newspaper down the street. We never
print stale news.”
preservation had kept them thinking
about themselves, but when their
child had been in danger they had
instinctively jumped into what was
almost certain death in a futile
attempt to save him!
“Didn’t my child deserve such
instinctive, unquestioning love?
Shouldn’t she too have someone who
was prepared to sacrifice everything
– even life – to keep her safe and
happy? And that person could only
be me. As I sat listening to that
woman weep, I felt like a mother for
the first time!”
When Tej came back she told her
brothers that she was not prepared
to get married and go away leaving
Jalaja behind. “I dread to think what
such abandonment would do to her
emotionally and psychologically,” she
told them. They listened quietly and
did not protest.
Tej finished her studies and got a
good job. And slowly and
painstakingly she began to build a
special relationship with her
* * * *
A young man selected an engagement
ring. When he was told the price he gave
a long, low whistle. “And how much is
that?” he asked pointing to a second.
“That one sir is two whistles.”
* * * *
Nirmala: How is it your hair is
Divya: Well, my sister was born
after my mother dyed her hair brown.
* * * my dear?”
Customer (In bookshop): Pardon
named Man, the master of woman.
Shop owner: Sir, the fiction depart-
ment is on the other side of the shop.
* * * honest opinion...”
company and said she wanted to
change the terms of her policy. “I’ve
just had twins,” she told the manager.
The manager had difficulty in
hearing her and asked, “Will you
repeat that please?”
“Not if I can help it,” the woman
shot back.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2008
daughter. When Jalaja, who calls her
younger aunt “mummy,” began
calling Tej ”ma,” she felt as if she had
won a great victory.
The advertisement – for Tej’s
remarriage was never inserted in the
newspapers. But there is today a
colleague who is showing interest in
Tej. “I like him,” says Tej. “But I don’t
know whether it will lead anywhere.
My daughter, who is nearly five now,
comes first for me. Every child
deserves to come first for its
parents!”
WHAT ABOUT
FATHER-LOVE?
As I spoke to a friend about the
women I had talked to about mother-
love, her husband leaned forward.
“What about father-love?” he asked
in an injured tone. “It’s every bit as
strong as mother-love. Doesn’t it
deserve to be written about too?”
Yes, it certainly does! But another
time! We
* *
Director: “Why did you engage that
man as cashier? He squints, has a
crooked nose and outstanding ears.”
Manager: “Of course, he will be so
easy to identify if he ever absconds.”
* *
The nice old lady smiled at the little
girl who had been left in-charge of the
confectioner’s shop.
“Don’t you sometimes feel tempted
to eat one of the nice cream chocolates,
The little girl was quite shocked.
“Of course not, that would be
stealing. I only lick them.”
* * *
Lawyer: “Well, if you want my
Client: “No, no. I want your
professional advice.”
* * *
A film actress was applying for a
passport.
“Unmarried?” asked the clerk.
“Occasionally,” replied the actress.
— Ram Babu, Vijayawada.
87
 LAC
ORNAMENTS
ARE AGAIN BECOMING
POPULAR
The ewellery is used in India on a

J
magnitude that has perhaps
few parallels. It seems that
time-honoured for every part of the human
body a special ornament has
glory of lac to be provided. Primary
articles like black beads,
ornaments is items from shell, lac, conch
shells, iron or copper
making waves in bangles, floral jewellery which
are essential and considered a
today’s world. symbol of good omen, appear as
vestiges from a distant past .
By Kusum Mehta Outside of metals, lac is most
profusely and widely used for turning
out attractive ornaments which are
coveted also for their alleged power

88 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

as a kind of charm to be worn. Lac is
the resinous substance which a
female lac insect produces in a
translucent reddish fluid when it is
embedded in a kind of cylinder of
pipal, bel or bar tree wigs to lay its
eggs.
Lac is used in the form of sticks
in two ways, one as raw material for
turning out various articles, largely
ornaments like bracelets, beads and
little trinkets, the other is for colouring
objects. The lac ornaments are used
by all classes of people and the
varieties seen are endless in design
and colour.
Bengal has quite a number of lac
ornaments. The har or mala
(necklace) is very long and graceful
with about 200 ring-shaped pieces,
all interlocked. It is usually made in
golden colour, but occasionally red
and green are used to form a colour
scheme.
A BANGLE IN BIG
DEMAND
The bangle called ruli made from
lac dust, the waste leftover, has a flat
surface, and has the largest demand.
It has a ritualistic significance and is
usually a sign of marriage. In this
there are various designs. One is
manchkana, fish bone, which is
designed on the outer surface of the
bangle with the aid of colours and
coloured threads, or coils prepared
from varying pigments mixed with lac.
Thin threads are drawn out from half-
molten, sticky lac and fixed to a stick.
A single-coloured thread is called
tar, when two are intertwined into a
single, it is machra. Dhenkua jal has
double chains patterned on the outer
surface of the bangle with the help of
different colours and threads, or coils
made from these colours. The raw
bangle is first coloured yellow, then
on the base, red and yellow are
adjusted with fingertips and the red
threads then fixed, all this setting
being carefully done to produce the
overlapping zigzag effect.
Thapa deoa has round, coloured
drops and is called the drop design.
Jal bandha is called the wired net
design because of its resemblance
to a net. In sikri jal, the base colour is
again yellow and the red and yellow OUTSIDE OF METALS,
intertwined threads are adjusted, and LAC IS MOST PROFUSELY
a zigzag is formed on the bangle in
red, with fingers. The design here AND WIDELY USED FOR
resembles a single chain drawn on TURNING OUT
the outer surface by the use of
different colours and threads. ATTRACTIVE ORNAMENTS
Barphulia is distinguished by four
chains on the surface again made by
WHICH ARE COVETED
the use of various colours and ALSO FOR THEIR
threads. The base is the same as in
the others, but here strings of red are ALLEGED POWER.
fixed in parallel zigzag lines.
In all the above-mentioned
bangles, the decorative motifs
resemble curved coil patterns, but in
the mayurpankh the designs are
patterned as the name suggests, on
the peacock feathers, drafted on the
outer surface of the bangle under
preparation, by the dextrous use of
red, yellow and black. Neither the
single tar nor the intertwined machra
is fixed on the surface of the bangle.
The decorative motif in this is the
combination of two motifs, one a
plait ornament or gulloche, of two
lines, the other is zigzag lines. The
colours are significant and supposed
to have some protective influence.
Bala is a bangle with round
surface. It is usually prepared from
the rejected portions of finished
articles and used only for
adornment. Usually, two designs are
made on the outer surface with an
engraved brass mould, called kathar
which is painted red or yellow and
pressed to impress the design on the
bangle. Lac work is done in a number
of places like the Burdwon district,
and parts of Chota Nagpur, and
Purulia in Mambhum district.
In Rajasthan,
lac jewellery, generally

IN RAJASTHAN,
LAC JEWELLERY,
GENERALLY BANGLES, IS
WORN ON ALL
AUSPICIOUS
OCCASIONS AS A SIGN
OF GOOD OMEN.
bangles, is worn on all
auspicious occasions as a sign
of good omen. Some bangles
are plain, others are studded
with glass pieces, bright stones,
beads, etc, and are the most
gorgeous. The designs on the
plain bangle are the traditional
lahariya (wavy) or zigzag. But
in the ornamental ones there
are many varieties like palia and
phooldar (wavy) or zigzag. But
in the ornamental ones there
90
are many varieties like patla and
phoolar (floral). They are also set
with salma, patri, etc. Once, these
used to be studded with real stones.
Jaipur is a big centre for them.
In Assam a composition of clay
and lacquer forms the body of the
bangles, and the decoration is made
of pure lac, coloured and laid on
narrow strips of red, yellow or blue,
which look very colourful.
Madhya Pradesh also makes lac
jewellery, the best known being in
Rewa and Indore, where ornaments
such as chokers, earrings, rings, hair
ornaments and large octagonal head
chains are made in traditional style.
Here lac is placed over tin foil and
melted, so the latter is fully covered
by lac. This is widely used for
ornaments which shine with a golden
effect.
Lac and glass combine to form a
special kind of jewellery in Delhi by
decorating it with spangles or beads.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Some are coated with ground tin
powder as paint, then covered with a
tinted transparent varnish to give a
metallic glimmer.
To silver the bangles, tin foil is
mixed with dry glue, then pounded,
washed and boiled and left to stand
until a silvery glue gets formed which
is spread on the lac as varnish. When
dry it is rubbed with glass beads. The
bangles are sometimes further
ornamented with glass beads, bits of
tin or copper foil stuck along the
edge. Lac ornaments are also made
in Ellickpur and Lalitpur.
CENTRE FOR LAC
BANGLES
Dohad in the Panch Mahals
district of Gujarat is an important
centre for lac bangles and the
process here calls for observation.
After they have been made singly,
several of them are slipped over the
conical head of a rice pounder,
slightly oiled for the purpose, then
warmed just enough to make them
stick together to form a longish single
bangle. They are later rubbed with
brick powder, then polished with
vermilion, blue or yellow coloured
varnish.
Meanwhile, cotton wool is wound
round a bamboo piece and hardened
by wetting and pressing on which the
required design is then pressed by a
large iron needle. This stamp is
dipped in a thin metallic paste made
of boiled iron and glue, then pressed
on the cylinder of bracelets to print
the pattern on them. Then varnish is
applied for three days to transform
the white impressions into a lovely
golden.
The ornamentation is completed
by studding the bangles with drops
of tin water, coloured red or made
white with chalk.
Today, there are certain distinctive
trends noticeable in the general
attitude towards lac jewellery. Ancient
forms are being sported with a sense
of pride and satisfaction and are
becoming popular. There is a definite
swing towards antique and traditional
jewellery. The old designs are in
vogue again. We
 IN PURSUIT OF

She uses
EXCELLENCE
s a collegian, artist

A
technical expertise Sharmishtha Dutta
preferred to graduate in
to satisfy her applied arts from the
College of Art, Delhi. A 10-
creativity. year stint as a professional
By Subhra in an advertising agency
established Sharmishtha
as a promising executive
destined to reach
appreciable heights in her chosen
career graph. But all this while, a
niggling urge to paint egged her on to
take up the brush and put a few
strokes on the canvas. And when she
did so – voila! – the transformation
was dramatic.
Before long, Sharmishtha had
embarked on a parallel career as a
committed artist, using her technical
expertise to good use in satisfying
her creativity, as a fine-arts
practitioner. Today, Sharmishtha has
made waves in the art world and her
works have been used to illustrate learnt the technique of application of
coffee table books. She is currently colours and the other details of art
about to hold her first solo showing at creation already. Fine art was, in
one of Delhi’s prestigious galleries. addition, giving me a chance to
What were the factors that you express my creative side. It was this
considered when you decided to emotional connect that weighed
make the switch from applied art heavily on the side of fine art, and
to fine art? that is why I took the plunge.
First, of course, was the factor of
my individual preference for fine art What did you miss when you
and painting. Then I realised that the decided to take up painting as a
subject for both of them, that is serious option?
painting, was not so different. I had Though I was happy to be able to

92 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 Looking ahead.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 93

satisfy my own persona by doing a
painting, I was not in daily touch with
an audience any more. I had also
enjoyed the gimmicks of producing
an advertisement with a telling
message and doing brilliant visuals
to go with it, but then… painting
compensated me in many ways. I no
longer regret my decision.
Since when did you realise that
you were cut out to be an artist?
Now that I look back, I think I was
always interested in art. As a child,
every spare moment was spent in
doodling, doing drawings and so on.
It now seems that I had simply grown
up with painting.
What are the subjects that you
like to paint?
I do mostly figurative works. It is
the feminine form that is my central
theme. I think this form is very
expressive through my works
because a lot of viewers have told
me that my woman looks very
sensual and the face expresses so
much of her inner mood of joy. I like
to paint the figure not as a silent
sufferer but as someone who relishes
her own company and is given to
introspection but not to brooding.
Have you exhibited an exclusive
showing of your feminine forms?
As a matter of fact, my
forthcoming exhibition has the
generic title of In the Company of
Myself. All the works are woman-
94
centric and the more I look at the
finished pieces the more I think the
title given to the lot is apt. In these
works, it is the woman and her many
moods and her joy in knowing her
self that is paramount.
How have viewers reacted to
this sensitive theme?
Their comments have been very
encouraging. The majority of them
have remarked that my paintings are
easy to understand. That point is my
yardstick of judging my work. I strive
to make my message very simple.
My art is trying to create something
pleasing. There is no layering in my
communication, so the viewer and
artist are face to face in my work. I
think I purposely stay away from
creating a very convoluted message.
What other themes have you
explored in your art?
I have also painted landscapes.
My latest works are in a black-and-
white palette on this theme. I have
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
restricted my choice of colours to
black and white and shades and
tones within it. Thus, for instance, the
night may be in black but there might
be a touch of red, or a hint of green,
as well. I don’t set out with a fixed
frame of colours, but certain colours
begin to appeal as the painting
progresses and, gradually, a palette
of monochromes begins to take
shape on the canvas. Of course,
brilliant contrasts are not me and I
purposely stay away from it.
What is the predominant object
that you like to place in your
landscape paintings?
In almost all of the landscape
paintings, the invariable presence is
that of the sky. It might be the dark,
looming clouds of a monsoon sky, or
it might be the fleecy clouds of a
winter morning sky. There might be
birds sitting across a line, but the sky
will also be visible in that work.
Objects such as a boat, a ship, might
intrude unconsciously into the painting
but then, it will be set against a red
sky and there might be white pigeons
flying across the crimson sky at twilight.
What thoughts are you trying to
convey through your depiction of
the sky?
A silver lining that appears after a
dark, cloudy sky has covered one’s
life. There is a message of hope
contained in the grimmest of sky
depictions. They are uplifting works
with a message of hope.
What is your favourite medium
for painting?
I like to use oils always and every
time. I find this medium full of fun. It
allows an artist maximum flexibility.
One can paint a surface in it in one
way, and completely change it the
next time. No other medium gives an
artist that freedom. Then, once the
surface is covered, one can use a
knife and create textures on the
surface, create a splash, or subdue
some part… the choices are endless.
It suits my creative urges and that is
what makes me go back to the
canvas whenever I have time, during
the day or night. We

Q&
I am 30 years old, and married for
the last five years. I have got my
periods regularly and though I am not
using contraceptive methods, I have
failed to conceive. Please help.
Having regular periods is no
guarantee that you are fertile. Many
such women are infertile. There may
be blockage of the fallopian tubes or
their movements are restricted with
the result that ovulation does not take
place. There are also other causes
like endometerosis and chronic pelvic
infections. You should consult your
A
doctor who after examining and
investigating you will be able to
locate the cause and do the needful.
I am 28-year-old single woman. I
have developed vesicular eruption on
my private parts. Some time ago
while partying I had sex with a
gentleman. Please help.
What you have got is probably
genital herpes which develops after
contact with an infected person. Your
doctor will be able to take a swab
from the blister and confirm the
diagnosis. You have committed the
mistake of having unprotected sex
and that too with a stranger. There is
always an increased risk of HIV
infection, the virus entering the blood
stream via these sores.
Q Q
I am 30 years old and married for the
last four years. Of late, I find that the
sex act with my husband has become
painful. Please help.
There are two factors in your
case. One is that your vagina has
become narrow. This could be as a
result of anatomical abnormality for
any operation at that place or most
commonly chronic pelvic infection. In
some women lack of vaginal
lubrication may be responsible.
Emotional stress and use of drugs
like antihistamines are also known to
reduce the lubrication. You will have
to consult your doctor who after
examining you will be able to locate
the real cause and treat you.
Q
I am 30 years old and have repeated
miscarriages. I am very much
worried. Please advise.
There are a number of causes
why a woman suffers from repeated
miscarriages. These range from
anatomical abnormalities of the
genitalia, chronic systemic diseases
(diabetes, severe anemia, renal
disease) to STD, etc. In some women
emotional stress may be responsible.
You should consult your doctor who
can rule out any operative cause. If
no specific cause is found, do not
lose heart and go on trying for a
successful pregnancy. It is quite likely
that you will succeed.
I am the 40-year-old mother of two
daughters. Of late, I have noticed a
sense of anxiety and restlessness. My
menstrual blood flow is also scanty
and I am getting severe itching on my
private parts. Please help.
What you have is the approaching
menopause. The scanty blood flow is
a prelude to the complete stoppage
of menses. Itching on your private
parts is the vasomotor manifestation
of this period and so are emotional
disturbances like anxiety and restless-
ness. Some women get ‘hot flushes’
which are quite distressing at times.
Do not worry. This is a passing phase
of life. Your doctor can prescribe the
required medicines to tide over the
difficult period.
I am 40 years old. Recently, I read in a
magazine that every woman after the
age of 40 should go for a pap smear to
rule out cervical cancer. Please advise.
Your report is correct. Pap smear
tests can detect potentially trouble-
some cells in the precancerous stage
of cancer cervix. If positive, one can
take remedial measures and save
oneself from one of the deadliest
cancers in women.
Q
I am a 20-year-old student. First I
used to have rashes on my private
parts but they disappeared after
some time. Now, I have developed
four-five boils at that area and these
are persisting. I have a boyfriend and
I do have sex with him. Please help.
It appears you have got yourself
in trouble. It is quite likely that you
have developed some form of
sexually transmitted disease. I
suggest you consult your doctor who
after examining you can treat you.
Q
I am a 30-year-old housewife. When I
get up in the morning my eyes are
puffy and there are dark patches
underneath. Please help.
Puffiness of the eyes could be
either due to nutritional deficiency or
renal pathology. Lack of sleep also
produces this. Poor blood circulation
and anaemia further worsen it. You
should be investigated on these lines.
Q
I am 30 years old, unmarried and
working in a multinational. My
problem is that my breasts become
very painful a week or so before the
onset of my periods. This is very
distressing. Please help.
Your problem is met commonly in
some women, especially unmarried
women or sterile women. It has
nothing to do with inflammation of the
breasts but is due to hormonal
imbalance (excess of oestrogen).
Your discomfort will depend on your
threshold of pain. Rest assured this is
a normal aberration and drugs do not
help. With passage of time you will
get adjusted to it.
— Dr S. N. Khosla, MD.
 About the artist
Dharmendra Kumar
Born: 10.2.1984
Education: Bachelor of fine art THIS IS THE WAY
IT WAS LIKE!
(College of Art, Patna)
Participations:
Sanskar Bharti (2000)
Bihar Voluntary coordinating
agency (2003)
Prativest East and West
A painter who treats objects in such
Paryavaranshiksha Kendra 2000 a way as if they have human qualities.
Bihar state pollution control board
Patna 2004
By Sonam Agrawal
College of art Patna 2002-2007
his is the way it was Dharmendra, presently, has

“T
PSK Laxmi Nagar New Delhi 2008
like” seems to
Work shops
Dharmendra Kumar to
Hyderabad Varition (Painting work
be the highest kind of
shop) 2006
praise for painting a
Variation Exhibition and work shop
canvas as he frames
2007 Patna
sombre glories of
Variation Exhibition and work shop
contemporary art to
2007 (Lalit Kala Academy,
reflect the increasing
Chennai)
trend of human life –
Iocyata art gallery 2007
individuals turning into machines.
Awards
The painter in his series
College Annual Awards (2003-
Reproduction system treats objects
2007) Patna
in such a way as if they have human
Contact No.: 09891916631
qualities. His illustrious objects, nuts
E-mail:
and bolts, are symbols of a quest for
dharmendra.kumar285@gmail.com
energy which have them own
distinctive pain and passion and
different cycles of life.
In a life, when human beings are
turning increasingly into machines, in
Dharmendra’s canvas it is noteworthy
to appraise the nuts and bolts turning
into more of individuals. He evokes
nuts and bolts in the form of a couple
who is fantasising squeezing, their
love juices to perpetuate their
existence into infinity.
shifted his mind to another interesting
development – science, scientists
and a different scientific theory. He
paints himself as an explorer
travelling from medieval innocent
abandon to a modern quest for
knowledge, control and power.
In one of the paintings he
sketches Aryabhatt inhabiting the
world with his concept of zero while
the other canvas presents “the law of
Newton” capturing gravity in his same
nut and bolt lifestyle.
Dharmendra devotes plenty of
time to each object to describe these
Titans in a very complimentary and
generous terms. He attempts to
overturn all the accepted canons of
modernism and totally immerses
himself in his paintings.
The artist uses oil colours to
master his work of art and gives an
ideal edge to his compositions. His
characters are nor portrayed with an
aim to armour fashion; on contrary,
they assert an aesthetic judgment.
His observations are grounded in

96 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 Nuts and Bolts.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 97

the local but his vision in of these machines only. Currently, I
unmistakably global. He is an artist have started to immerse myself on
to watch in future. He has avoided the theme science, scientists and
the limelight despite his reputation, scientific theory.
and paints more out of necessity than
a desire to reach an audience. The figure nuts and bolts, what
do they represent?
Excerpts from an interview: In fact, a nut figures a man while
What does art mean to you? bolt is portrayed as his intimate soul.
It seems to me as if it gives a As I have already said that it shows
great deal of freedom to the actual an individual turning into a machine. I
movement of emotion and mind in think that they can be more potent
the course of life. One of the things I symbols of mechanism trying to
like about painting is the assumption colonise our lives and overthrow the
that one is flawed. You never do supremacy of humans the nut and
anything exactly right; you never bolt oozing the culls of life in
achieve what you aspire to. variegated colours of life.

Give a brief account of your life. How do you fashion your

My father Pashupati Sharma is a imagination?
businessman in the Shivang district For me, painting is such a private,
of Patna. My mother Adharmati Devi solitary thing to rediscover yourself.
takes care of my house along with In this form of art you actually do
my three brothers and as many something that is meaningful for other
sisters. In 2002, I got admission in people, and it is extremely gratifying
the College of Arts, Patna. It drew a for an artist like me. At the end, I wish
sketch of my future but when my first to become a great spirit of the age,
exhibition Hyderabad Variation took and all the rest will fall into shadow.
place, it confirmed to me that I have
to make my path in the art only. I, Tell us about something your
therefore, moved from Bihar to Delhi exhibitions.
to observe things from inside. My first venture was held during
my degree course. It was like a
What is the underlying theme of workshop but instilled self confidence
your art? in me. I was frankly happy with that
I do painting for myself, my self- as at the time I had never thought of
satisfaction. My earlier works myself as someone who could fetch
depicted the reproduction system such senior artists at his initial stage
theme in the figure of a rickshaw and of career. From then onwards, I
nuts and bolts. It said the journey of never looked back.
the human being turning into a
machine in the 21st century when What does a prize matter to
most of the work done with the help you?
I do think it sort of
accelerates the pheno-
menon of having art
lovers in the first place,
which are always a
privilege and a surprise.

Your next venture?

If luck helps me, you
(art lovers) will definitely
be invited for a complete
show. Some preparation
is left. It may take place
in November of this
year. We

98 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009


R. S. Prakash
HAVING been under production for
long, Manjal Veyyil has at last hit the
screens. The film is an intriguing love
– affair narrated through three
characters but is not a triangular love
story! Prasanna Bala (of Anbu and
Kadhal Kisukisu fame) and Kadhal
Sandhya play the lead roles. Each
one of them has executed
themselves well and creditably too.
Bharathwaj’s music is a plus point.
The script written and directed by
Vaseegaran has a lot of twist and
turns and is certain to sustain the
interest of the viewers. It is one more
feather in Prasanna’s cap who
despite being in the early stages of
his career, never ceases to
experiment with characters.
AKINA Productions Raghavan is a
riveting thriller in which new comer
Vijeeth depicts the title role that too
with natural ease. Another fresher
Radhika Malhotra does provide the
glamour quotient for the film, which
has a lot of intimate scenes. Rightly
so, the film has been given an ‘A’
certificate. The central theme focuses
on the excessive and high-handed
behaviour of the I.T. professional who
allegedly crosses the limits of
decency and culture when it comes
to having relationship . Manoj K
Jayam as the dedicated and
disciplined cop is impressive.
Paranthaman who has handled the
story, screenplay, dialogue and
direction has done a fairly neat job.
Gangai Amaran’s music is passable.
WRITER-director Madhumita, who
took off to a flying start with her
maiden venture Vallamai Thaarayo,
which proved a hit at the box office,
has this time taken up a light-hearted
venture for her second film that
boasts of a fun-filled title Kola Kolaya
Mundirika. Mohan has assumed the
responsibility for the script and
screenplay and it is needless to
mention that it would be a runaway
comedy. The film is being produced
by Thirisakthi Sundarraman and
Nalini Sundarraman. The film has
Karthik Kumar and Shika in the lead
roles with an able supporting cast
that consists of Jayaram, Anandraj,
Vasu Vikram, M.S. Bhaskar, T.M.
Karthik, Kota Srinivasa Rao and
Delhi Ganesh. It is a treasure hunt
kind of story and the full-length
comedy will aim at making the
audience laugh repeatedly in two
hours!
FEATHER Touch Entertainment’s
Malai Malai’ is a big budget bonanza
which has Arun Vijay in the lead role
with Vedika playing his love-interest.
Prabhu and Prakashraj appear in
cameos and their characters are
going to be highly talked about,
opines a unit hand. Director, A.
Venkatesh who has churned out
several hits as Mahaprabhu,
Chocklet, Bhagavathi, Dum, Kuthu,
Yeh and Vathiyar, etc. has assumed
responsibility for the story and
direction. Kasthuri, former Miss
Madras is also playing a vital role in
the film. The film is certain to
resurrect Arun Vijay’s fortunes in the
film industry.
WHILE the present trend is to make
action flicks K.S. Rajan and V.S.
Valsalarajan have teamed up to
make Aaru Maname which is a family
tale. Sudhish Sankar has directed the
film which has newcomer Deepak
playing the lead. Nicole Karthika who
paired opposite Sarath Kumar in
Nam Naadu is the film’s leading lady.
Kanja Karuppu is appearing in a dual
role in this film. Rajesh, Sriman,
Ponnambalam, Anand and
Thalaivasal Vijay are also in the cast.
Sudhish Shankar has handled the
story and dialogue. Srikanth Deva is
the composer.
SIVAGIRI is the maiden venture of
Illusion Engineering which sketches
the life and times of a dare-devil cop
named Sivagiri nearly 70 per cent of
the film has been shot at Malaysia
and newcomer Sivagiri is getting his
break in the title role as Sivagiri.
Rukshana, Chandni and Risha are
his three heroines. Guhan plays the
villain. Venniradai Moorthi, Vasu
Vikram, Nennai Siva and Balu Anand
are also appearing in important roles.
Rajamani is handling the camera.
Debutant scorer Arafin Yusuf has
tuned five melodious songs. There
are breathtaking stunt sequences
and Sivagiri has performed them
without using doubles.
JAYAMATHI Pictures, Bayam
Ariyaan has a different theme that
has not been ventured on the screen
so far. The theme is centred around a
pair of lovers who intend to embark
upon their lives from the crematorium
and the mother who sacrifices herself
for their sake. Fresh face Mahesh
Raja is the hero of the film. Sanuja,
Devi Krupa and Aswathi are the three
heroines. Kishore, Manikandan,
Saranya and Ponnambalam are also
in the cast. K. Sarganuraja has
produced this flick which has been
handled by Prathesh. Some
important scenes of the film have
been canned at a cremation ground
in Puduchery. The songs have been Naal Mudhal fame Mouli is also
shot at locations in Kulu-Manali. playing an important role in the film.
Sudhir Chaudhary is the cameraman.
DREAM Valley Corporation Aayirathil
Oruvan , written and directed by SRI Periya Andavar Films Chithira
Selvaraghavan has at last been Poove is a spectacular venture, the
wrapped up after having been under audio of which was released recently
production for long. It is a period on a lavish scale. Newcomer RS
potboiler with Karthi, Reema Sen, Kalaimurugan, who has been trying to
Andrea, Pratap Pothen, Alagam start a film for the past several years
Perumal and Parthiban in the lead without being anybody’s understudy
roles. G. V. Prakash Kumar is the has handled the story, screenplay,
scorer while Ramji is the dialogue, lyrics and music besides
cinematographer. The audio launch directing the film. Newcomer Sandeep
of the film was held on a lavish scale and Thamaraj play the lead roles.
which had Kerala, “Singari Melam, Sabitha Anand, Mumtaz, Saraman
Rope dance, Snake Dance, Kalari and many others are playing vital roles
Fight, classical dance, Makossa in the film which has camera work by
Dance from Nigeria and Dallu’s Tamizhagaran. We
fashion show.
REAL Image and
Satyam cinema
have come together
to launch their first
feature film Thiru
Thiru Thuru
directed by the
fresh director, J.S.
Nandhini Ajmal and
Rupa play the lead
roles in this flick
which will have an
all-digital release in
India and abroad.
Shot on Red one
Camera, post-
production will be in
$K resolution.
Nandhini JS is a
former deputy of
Priya. V of Kanda
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 101
TAMIL STARS S P E A K !
ASAL ROLLS ON!
he launch of Sivaji Film’s Asal
T (which means original) was
certainly a celebration of sorts
as the muhurat has the original
flavour of a (film) carnival time. What
was supposed to be simple puja
function at the residence of Thespian
Sivaji Ganesan at T. Nagar Chennai,
turned out to be a grand gala opening
ceremony that had a lot of gloss and
grandeur. Ajith was obviously the
cynosure of all eyes with a new
hairdo and mustache with his actress
wife Shalini at her side. Ajith was
quiet right through the function
keeping a safe distance from all. Asal
will be a landmark film in my career,
that’s what all he could say.
If is a known fact director Saran
and actor Ajith, who have come
together after a long gap, are sparing
no efforts to making their ongoing
project Asal an impressive film.
Sources close to the unit hint that the
screenplay is being shaped and
structured by Saran in such a way
that it will possess all the trappings of
a sure-fire winner.
Thespian Sivaji Ganesan’s home-
banner, Sivaji Films, which is
FROM WRITING TO ACTING!
ilm-makers and film technicians
F turning as heroes is no new
phenomenon. Likewise film
lyricists turning as actors is also
something that cannot be termed
new! Late poet laureate Kannadasan
played the protagonist in Karuppu
Panam years ago. Valee too played
a full-length character role in K.
Balachander’s Poikkal Kudirai .
Contemporary lyricist Vairamuthu too
102
R. Prakash
currently managed by the veteran’s
sons-actor Prabhu and his elder
brother Ramkumar, is producing
Asal . Initially, they had planned to
shoot the film in locations hitherto
never tried at all, like – Scotland,
Italy, Turkey, etc. But somehow
things did not work out as desired. It
is now learnt that Malaysia, the
preferred location of the film
fraternity, is likely to be the choice
that has been shortlisted.
Also, the unit which was anxiously
hunting for a new face to play the
pivotal role of a villain in the film has
has appeared before the camera.
Well-known lyricist Pa-Vijay who
has established his credentials as a
seasoned lyricist is now playing the
lead role in Gnabagangal which is
said to be memorable tale of love,
which is based on a real-life story.
In a touching short film that has
made Pa Vijay speak about his late
friend Kanthiravan, with whom he
shared a room during his early days
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
now confirmed that Rajiv Krishna
who played the baddie in Newtonin
Moondram Vidhi and coolly pulled the
rug under S.J. Suryah, the film’s lead
man, is going to be playing the villain
in Asal.
Much more interesting than all the
facts in the wake of the observations
of current Health Minister, which had
a contributory effect on the aspect of
lifting the ban on screen-smoking,
Ajith will be sporting a Cuban Cigar
between his lips during most of his
appearances in the film. From the
point of view of the makers, it has
been devised and designed thus in
order to lend credibility to the lead
character. Ajith the lead man of the
film has been offered the freedom to
light up the screen. According to the
actor, his smoking mannerism is
certain to stand out in the film.
While it was already announced
that Sameera Reddy is the film’s
leading lady, Mamta Mohandas was
to play the other heroine, but it is now
believed that Mamta chose to walk
out of the project as she did not
prefer playing second fiddle to
Sameera Reddy. Nevertheless, there
are umpteen numbers of other
heroines who would come forward
willingly to lap it up. Isn’t?
in the industry, and Kathiravan’s love
affair with Meera, who was their
neighbour. Kanthiravan who believed
in socialism, went back to his native
place with a broken heart after he
was arrested for a crime he did not
commit. After a few months, when I
went to meet him, he was no more.
However, I found a diary in my room
that belonged to him. The incidents
that he recorded in his diary have
been made into this film. Added Pa
Vijay, ‘This film will keep his
memories alive.’
 The national award-winning lyricist
has made his acting debut earlier but
for some reasons unknown, that
project proved a non-starter! But here
he is now to take off as an actor. The
heroine of the film is Sreedevika and
one can comfortably assume that
there will be enough and more of
romantic scenes between the lyricist-
turned actor and the leading lady.
The flick is being directed by
Jeevan, who had made his debut
through Mayilu which is yet to be
released.
‘Nizhalgal Ravi’ and Chandru are
SCREEN WRITING GETS SERIOUS!
ut for a few exceptions,
B Kollywood has always suffered
from the setback of not having
sufficient script writers for films
despite the fact that Tamil literature
has always had a veritable wealth of
storytelling talent. Of course, screen
writing is an entirely different ball
game altogether and there is a sea of
difference between writing a story as
against translating the same on the
screen.
It has always been a case of
cause and concern that India being
the largest film-making country in the
world, there has not been a full-
fledged institute or college that came
forward to offer a programme in
screen – writing till recently.
For that matter there has not been
a proper avenue to learn the principles
of craft until recently. In fact, it was
only since 2004 or so, when screen –
writing was looked at seriously by a
few who were genuinely interested in
developing the craft.
also in the main cast.
Says Vijay: The
underlying theme of the
film is woven around the
concept that every human
being has some memories
– good or bad that keep
haunting him at every turn
of life.
The music of the film
was released recently at
AVM Studio which was attended by a
galaxy of film personalities, all of
whom welcomed Vijay to face the
camera.
Well, the Chennai International
Screen Writing Workshop, which is
the brainchild of actor Kamal Hassan
that was unveiled recently, promises
a fair and fine deal for aspiring
screen writers.
The 250 participants for the
workshop were chosen from 1,500
applications. ‘If we can get at least a
dozen to write passionately one new
film in the next few years, we have
achieved a lot,’ remarked Hariharan,
director, L.V. Prasad Film and TV
Academy.
Atul Tiwari, who did the Hindi
dialogue for Dashavatar and Anjum
Rajabali – both being acclaimed
screen writers and teachers have
handled the sessions.
In his address, Kamal declared
that he would have the right of first
refusal on those screen plays and
hopes to pick at least one which he
feels will be worthy of turning into a
film.
Director Rakesysh Omprakash
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Pa Vijay has also assumed
responsibility for the story,
screenplay dialogue and
songs besides producing the
film under his home banner.
One more main aspect of
the film is the musical score of
debutant scorer James Vick,
who is a former Keyboard
player under the baton of twin-
Oscar winner, A.R. Rahman.
Pa Vijay lyrics have always
exhibited a poetic quality. Hopefully,
the same will be evident in his
handling of other portfolios too.
Mehra who was exclusively flown
down from Mumbai to address the
valendictory function, was the guest
of honour.
Mr Mehra went on to elaborate on
how he went about structuring the
script of Rang De Bansanti as well
as how he dealt with the screenplay
of Dilli in an unstructured fashion by
resorting to an unconventional
methodology of film narration.
Kamal Hassan said those
screenwriters need to be ready to
deal with platforms which are palm-
size. We have to take to platform like
Youtube. Just like how everyone is
different. The length of the film will
change; the length will get shorter
because our attention spans will get
shorter. Why should every film have
six songs? It’s not that I am against
songs, I am against mono culture, he
added. ‘We have to get talent from
the small town and let them tell their
stories in the universal language.
People are same everywhere in the
world’ observed Mehra.
Veteran Writer Jean Claude
Carrier, K. Balachander, Sriram
Raghavan, Gollapudi Maruthi Rao,
Balu Mehendra, French writer Olivier
Lorelle, Shekhar Kapur, Rituparno
Ghosh, Shyamprasad, Bharat Bala,
Los-Angeles-based screen writer
David Scrap and producer Michael
Andreen were other speakers who
addressed the gathering.
Indeed, it was a commendable
effort on the part of Kamal Hassan,
whose association with the film
industry is about to complete 50
glorious years!
103
 BLOWING IT COLD AND HOT!
ell, female film-makers
W aren’t entirely new to
Kollywood. Amidst the new
breed of young female film-makers,
Anitha Udeep seems to stand out
having already ventured two films in
English- Knock, Knock, I am looking
to Marry, way back in 2003 and
Gulliver Travels, a 3 D animation
film, that was made in 2006. Having
set a precedent of making a film
once in three years, Anith has now
come up with Kulir 100 Degree,
which is her first feature film.
Anitha is obviously thrilled at her
first feature flick assignment, ‘My
target audience is the urban youth
and it is about a group of students at
a boarding school. I have fashioned
the screenplay in such a manner that
it speaks of the laughter, pain, love
and anger of students belonging to
the contemporary generation. New
scorer Bebo Sashi is the son of
Murali of the famous Sabesh-Murali
team. The film has been shot in
Super-35 mm by cinematographer
Vijay, a deputy of Aravind Krishna. I
particularly liked the way he has
brought in new sounds.
Also, we have given
the film different tones
based on the mood of the
characters and reactions
besides some good visual
effects, she exclaims.
Anitha has had the
privilege to work with
Dream Works (owned by
Steven Spielberg) and
has been there for nearly
a year and a half.
‘I have always, wanted to make a
film on teenagers most crucial years
in their life. It was indeed an
enjoyable task to capture the thought
process of the urban youth, says she.
Anitha explains the logic behind the
title.’ It means cold and hot, reflecting
the state of minds of teens’
Anitha has also done a three-year
course in film-making in the USA. I
made a short film ‘Flowery Thorn’
which pulled the attention of Dream
Works in my direction. I have even
worked with director Steven Spielberg
and his crew on the science – fiction
scenes titled ‘Taken’.
The film is a youth-oriented story
using their lingo and it has tried to
tell things their way.
The pretty writer and director who
runs the ten-screen Mayajaal
Multiplex which is rated as one of the
most successful multiplexes in the
country, seems to have understood
the pulse of today’s youth. The film
has been shot at locations in Ooty,
Kodaikanal and Munnar.
The film has good message too.
It focuses on the relationship
between friends and one’s attitude
towards the system and life. All the
same, it is not preachy but has a nice
subtle message that has been told in
an entertaining manner. Film-makers
like Anitha Udeep are certain to take
Tamil films to further heights. We

ACIDITY
THE SLOW AND SILENT
ave you experienced a sour
H
and sometimes bitter taste
in your mouth, or a burning
sensation in the throat,
chest or stomach? Well,
what you're suffering from is
acidity. Ignoring acidity can
actually lead you to more
serious and complicated
problems like peptic ulcers.
It is quite a simple problem when it
begins, but it can get out of hand
easily if not taken seriously.
There are many names for acidity
like hyperacidity or acid dyspepsia or
acid reflux or gastroesopohageal
reflux disease, or urdhva gata
amalpitta in Ayurveda. Acidity refers
to a set of symptoms caused by an
inequity. It is due to the excess
secretion of acid by the gastric
glands of the stomach. The stomach
secretes hydrochloric acid that is
responsible for the proper functioning
of the digestive system. This acid
further secretes various digestive
106
How to tackle heartburn.
By Dietician and Sports Nutritionist
Deepshikha Agarwal
enzymes like pepsin that break the
food particles down for easy
digestion. A normal level of acid is
required in the stomach for proper
digestion of the complex foods. When
there is excess secretion of this
gastric acid, it gives rise to a
condition known as acidity. It seems
to be very simple but the damage it
can cause in the body is hard to
imagine.
Like its name, there are many
causes of this acidity:
● Stress is one of the main
causes.
● Smoking and excess of alcohol
tends to weaken the nervous system,
as a result the mucus membrane and
the stomach lining stops functioning
properly.
● High intakes of fatty and spicy
foods, refined and fibreless foods,
overeating and eating hurriedly are
few causes that aggravate acidity.
● Excessive intake of caffeine
and nicotine.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
KILLER
● Skipping meals/fasting.
Other causes of acidity or
heartburn are pregnancy, ageing,
anxiety and insomnia, obesity,
posture, erratic meal timings and bad
eating habits.
Acidity is a problem that occurs
very commonly; so going in for
medications every time doesn't seem
to be a very good thought. Some very
simple, natural home remedies can
be used to treat and prevent acidity.
● Chew a few basil (tulsi) leaves
to get relief from burning, nausea and
gas. It is an effective home-remedy
for acidity. You can also have one tsp
of tulsi juice every morning and
before going to sleep at night.
● Keep a small piece of jaggery
(gur) in your mouth and slowly suck
it. Repeat it every hour till the acidity
subsides.
● Drink coconut water 3-4 times
a day. It is a common natural remedy
for acidity.
● Have plenty of milk and milk
products – having curds and
buttermilk at regular intervals will help
to subside acidity. Have a glass of
cold milk or a cup of vanilla ice cream
for instant relief from heartburn.
● Daily intake of fresh mint juice
slowly after meals will help you
prevent acid reflux.
● Boil cumin seeds in a glass of
water and drink it with meals.
● The fruits like watermelon,
banana and cucumber also reduce
acidity.
● Herbal tea containing liquorice
(mulethi) is also beneficial instead of
normal tea, coffee and aerated
drinks.
● Drinking water in the early
morning controls acidity, as water is a
good neutraliser for acid. One can
have a glass of lukewarm water with
one tsp of honey early in the morning
and start day.
● Ginger is a spice well known
for its gastrointestinal complaints.
● Kokum sherbet with cumin
seeds (jeera) will help you to get rid
of this problem.
Line of defence/lifestyle
changes to prevent acidity
EXERCISE HELPS IN
Stop smoking and binging on hard CONTROLLING
drinks. Smoking after meals
increases the chance of heartburn.
ACIDITY. A MORNING
Do not lie down immediately after AND EVENING WALK
your meals. Before going to bed,
make sure you give your body
OF AT LEAST 30 MINS
enough time to digest the food you IS GOOD FOR YOUR
eat. Your stomach digests the food
with the help of acid. Avoid lying
HEALTH AND KEEPS
down after meals to keep the acid THE ACIDITY DISEASE
where it should be. Eat your meal at
least three hours before going to bed.
UNDER CONTROL.
Proper posture is another factor
which should be taken care of. While
eating, avoid slouching on the table.
After the meal, keep your back
straight and upright. At night sleep in
the right posture and at the right
elevation as it will help in acidity
control, like keeping your head on a
high pillow of up to six inches. Avoid
sleeping on/over your stomach.
Wear comfortable underclothes.
Tight belts should also be avoided.
Pregnant women should have
small mid-meals at regular intervals.
To minimise heartburn, women
should have solid carbohydrate foods
like biscuits, rusks, khakras, bread or
a fruit. At the same time avoid rich,
fried, strongly-flavoured and highly-
spiced foods. Eat liquid and solid
foods half an hour apart. in controlling acidity. A morning and
Frequent use of medicines like evening walk of at least 30 minutes is
aspirin or Disprin should be avoided. good for your health and keeps the
Eat small meals at regular acidity disease under control. Yogic
intervals, at least five – six meals per exercises and meditation keep your
day. Avoid keeping long gaps. Make overall internal system (like digestive
sure to eat little after every three – systems, nervous system) and
four hours. external system in good condition.
Be fit. Try and maintain your ideal Try to avoid chemically-prepared
body weight. Overweight people are medicines – though they suppress
more prone to heartburn the acid formation in the stomach,
attacks. Avoid very spicy, they badly affect the digestive system
high sodium containing and and have many side effects. If you
deep-fried foods – e.g., don’t feel better even after various
papads, pickles, various precautions, then go for the right
chilli sauces etc. Finally, eat diagnosis at the right time. Consult
vegetables and fruits rich in your physician for proper medication
fibre. and treatment.
Exercise helps A simple and easy lifestyle can
keep you healthy and happy. After
all, “Health is wealth” proverb was not
made in a day. Every disease has its
cure, so live a balanced and stress-
free life. We
DEALING WITH
THALASSEMIA
Children with
thalassemia cause
anguish to their
parents. How to
deal with the
problem?
By Dr Kiran Bala
ike any newly-married couple,
L
the Luthras too were very
much in love and started a
family. But they soon realised
that their child was not
looking as healthy as other
children of his age. He did not
have much appetite and
vomited often. He was not
looking like a healthy six-
month-old. A blood test showed
defective red cells. A repeat test from
a premier institute confirmed that the
child had thalassemia major. It was a
shock at first. They started thinking
of the prognosis of the disease. The
first transfusion for the child was a
nightmare. Then the second one and
the third one and it continued
regularly. Parents became more used
to the trauma and they tried their best
to get the pricks for the child from the
most experienced medical personnel.
Thalassemia is a haemoglobin
108
chain abnormality in which the red
blood cells do not form properly and
cannot carry sufficient oxygen. This
condition begins during childhood
and lasts throughout life. It is the
most commonly inherited single gene
disorder in the world. In this disease,
lack of blood (anaemia) and retarded
growth, decreases the survival
possibilities of the patient. The
patient needs frequent blood
transfusion and costly treatment to
avoid the side-effects of loaded iron
in the body. Thalassemia major,
which was considered a fatal
disease, can now be effectively
treated by regular blood transfusions
and iron chelation. Many patients
with this disease are now living in the
fourth decade of life, are married and
have children.
Thalassemia is the world’s most
common genetic disorder and it is
rapidly rising. Seven per cent of the
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
world’s population is a carrier
and 400,000 affected babies
are born each year. WHO
predicts doubling of these
statistics within few decades.
The rapid increase is largely
due to changing
demographics. While
populations are at risk of
all
thalassemia, it is most common in
the South Asian community,
particularly the Asian Indian
community.
INHERITED DISEASES
Beta thalassemia major and
thalassemia intermedia are inherited
in an autosomal recessive pattern,
which means two copies of the genes
in each cell are altered. Most often,
parents of an individual with an
autosomal recessive disorder are
carriers of one copy of the altered
genes but don’t show signs and
symptoms of the disorder. For the
couples affected with thalassemia
major is one in four. This is one of
the reasons for pre-marriage
screening programmes. If both the
partners have thalassemia minor, the
offspring can be born with features
of thalassemia major.
The thalassemia trait is found in
people whose ancestors came from
Cyprus, Greece, Italy, Turkey, the
Arabian peninsula and Asia including
India, Pakistan, Southern China,
Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam and
Laos. It is also found in people from
Africa and the West Indies. It is
estimated that two million people in
the USA have the “Thalassemia trait.”

If one of the partners has

thalassemia minor it becomes
essential to check the haemoglobin
pattern by electrophoretic studies of
the other partners.
Beta thalassemia in India ranges
from 3.5 to 15 per cent in the general
population. Every year, 10,000
children are born in India, which
constitute 10 per cent of the total
number in the world. The distribution
of the beta thalassemia gene is not
uniform in the Indian subcontinent.
The highest frequency of the beta
thalassemia trait is reported in
Gujarat, followed by Sindh, Punjab,
Tamil Nadu, rest of South India and
Maharashtra (1.9 per cent). It is
possible to detect this prenatally by
CVS and PCR techniques with a 99.5
per cent reliability. Family study for
linkage analysis is preferable before
or at the time of diagnosis.
techniques are used for antenatal marrying a person with the trait.
What we can do to prevent diagnosis although different centres If married: If both husband and
thalassemia: The majority of in the world use different techniques wife have the thalassemia trait,
children with thalassemia major in – southern blotting/PCR and chances of the baby having
developing countries do not receive hybridisation to synthetic thalassemia major are 25 per cent.
proper treatment due to the oligonucleotides, dot blot, reverse dot Get the pregnancy tested for the
exorbitant cost of therapy, short blot and PCR-based amplification disease early during pregnancy to
supply of blood for transfusion and refractory mutation system. The decide whether to carry on with the
the risk of transfusion-associated preferred obstetrical procedure for pregnancy.
disorders. It is necessary, therefore, obtaining foetal DNA is chorionic Parental diagnosis of beta
to reduce the burden of this disease villus sampling, although thalassemia major involves a series
by avoiding the birth of affected amniocentesis and foetal blood of steps.
children. Currently, this can only by sampling can also be used. Identification of couples at risk.
achieved by antenatal diagnosis. In India, 100 million people are Genetic counselling
Universally, DNA-based carriers of this disorder, and at least Foetal testing
10,000 babies are born every year Laboratory tests
with thalassemia. There is a shortage Follow-up counselling
of treatment including transfusion for Couple at risk: Couples at risk are
many of these patients. A special identified by simple blood tests or, all
blood test to diagnose the condition too often, after the birth of an affected
is available free of charge in these child. Carriers of thalassemia can be
Delhi Government Hospitals: easily identified by the presence of
Lok Nayak Hospital microcytic hypochromic anaemia in
GTB Hospital the absence of iron deficiency
DDU Hospital anaemia. Most carriers of beta
Before marriage: Get the blood thalassemia also have higher than
tested for diagnosing the normal haemoglobin A2.
disease/trait. If you are suffering from Once the couples are identified to
the trait and unmarried, avoid be at risk of having a child affected

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 109


with thalassemia major, they should
be referred for genetic counselling
and laboratory testing for
identification of mutations either pre-
conception or just after conception.
The ideal time for genetic
counselling is prior to conception or
as early as possible after conception.
After preparing the family pedigree
risk of occurrence or recurrence
should be explained to the couples.
They should be allowed to make
informed decisions regarding foetal
testing.
With an affected child: All couples
who have an affected child should be
offered the option of prenatal
diagnosis in the next pregnancy. This
is widely accepted by the parents and
the limitation of this application is the
small number of centres with
adequate facilities for foetal sampling
and laboratories which can carry out
molecular diagnostic studies. This
approach helps the affected couple
to have normal children and avoid the
burden of another affected child.
However, it has limited impact by
itself for reducing the burden of the
disorder in the community. For
example, if the final family size is two
children per couple, birth of only 1/8
of cases of thalassemia major would
be prevented by this approach.
Inductive screening: In order to be
more precise, some form of
prospective identification of couples
at risk is necessary. One approach
is to extend carrier screening to all
relatives of the couple who have
given birth to an affected child. This
is called “inductive” screening and is
increasingly being resorted to by the
relatives. For this there is a need for
an educational campaign. For a
preventive programme to have the
maximum impact, prospective
screening of all persons in the
reproductive age group should be
undertaken. This approach can be
adopted initially by states with a high
carrier frequency of beta thalassemia
(more than 2.5 per cent), such as
Maharashtra, Gujarat, Rajasthan,
Delhi, Punjab, Haryana, Bengal,
Bihar, Orissa and UP.
Routine thalassemia minor
screening: We know that thalassemia
can be prevented by marriage
counselling and by antenatal
diagnosis. But, in view of poor health
education, the arranged marriage
system and social customs in our
country, marriage counselling may
not be a very practical solution at
present. Routine thalassemia minor
screening of all early pregnancies
and the antenatal diagnosis wherever
required should be performed. We
 Dealing with an alcoholic
spouse can be tough,
though it may not be that
difficult to help him on the way
to recovery. By Shailja Mehta

h no, not again Suman “Sorry isn’t enough.” Suman

O
screamed in her mind as
Gaurav stumbled in drunk.
I can’t take this anymore.
Suman’s heart beat faster
as the anger inside her
bubbled up reaching the
point of explosion.
Grabbing his white button-
down shirt, Suman ripped
it open and began beating on his
chest with both fists screaming at
him, “Who do you think you are
treating me like this! You’re not the
man I married.”
They married young and had
2 children. During this time Gaurav
started a business, worked hard and
now had an extremely successful
business. But this success came at a
high price. Through the years Gaurav
had developed the habit of drinking
too much. Now, he spent more time
with his friends nursing a drink than
being with his family. Alcohol
controlled him.
Gaurav, so intoxicated, couldn’t
even react to her outrage. He
mumbled something about being
sorry.
railed. The smell of alcohol
emanating from his pores
nauseated her.
Gaurav fell onto their bed,
without even changing his
clothes and lapsed into a deep
drunken sleep. Suman cried
herself to sleep again.
Often, marriage can be a
difficult road. While most of us don't
expect it to be perfect all the time,
there are times when it is downright
painful. For instance, if you're dealing
with an alcoholic spouse – it can be
one of the hardest things you've ever
had to deal with.
When dealing with an alcoholic,
the problem is often kept a secret.
The alcoholic tries to hide the extent
of his drinking problem, and those
close to him or her often assist with
that process. Bringing the problem
out into the open is helpful for all
concerned. It does not mean,
however, that the alcoholic is going to
agree that there is a problem.
One of the worst things we can do
is make excuses for our spouses
because we don't want to accept the

112 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

real truth. You might say, “He's – including you, children and your
stressed out right now and the marriage. If you have children, it's
WHEN DEALING
alcohol allows him to relax and calm even worse. In fact, you could be WITH AN
down.” You might even go as far as allowing your children to live in
saying, “He's not hurting anyone with danger. No one wants to hurt their
ALCOHOLIC, THE
his alcohol usage, so what's the big spouse or alienate them, but enabling PROBLEM IS OFTEN
deal?” The truth is that spouses do them could be tragic. Step back and
this all too often. If you're making take a hard look at the situation.
KEPT A SECRET. THE
excuses for your addicted husband, Refuse to make excuses for your ALCOHOLIC TRIES TO
stop now.
The truth is that your addicted
spouse any longer.
The second step is to get help.
HIDE THE EXTENT OF
spouse probably is hurting someone Chances are that you're not going to HIS DRINKING
be able to help your spouse alone.
There are many, many resources for
PROBLEM, AND
individuals who are suffering from THOSE CLOSE TO HIM
addictions as well as their spouses.
Bringing around
OR HER OFTEN ASSIST
others who WITH THAT PROCESS.

have overcome addictions or who are

working on it can really help your
husband find the inspiration to get
through this. You may want to
convince your spouse to start a
programme. If you're unable to
convince your spouse to get
help, force him to get help.
By issuing an ultimatum
like you would leave him,
you could be saving your
spouse's life.
It may be helpful for
the alcoholic to hear
how his or her
behaviour has

IS YOUR HUSBAND
AN ALCOHOLIC
 IT IS ALSO USEFUL FOR
FAMILY AND FRIENDS
TO BE CLEAR ABOUT
HOW THE
ALCOHOLIC’S
BEHAVIOUR HAS
AFFECTED THEM,
BECAUSE IT CAN
GUIDE THEIR FUTURE
BEHAVIOUR. FOR
INSTANCE, IF THE WIFE
HAS BEEN CALLING
IN SICK FOR HER
HUSBAND AND SHE
FEELS GUILTY ABOUT
LYING TO HIS BOSS,
ACKNOWLEDGING
THAT IS THE FIRST STEP
TOWARD CHANGING
THAT BEHAVIOUR.
affected others, but the alcoholic is
often not in the right frame of mind
to take that information in during the
alcoholism intervention. He or she is
often too busy denying that there is a
problem. It is also useful for family
and friends to be clear about how the
alcoholic’s behaviour has affected
them, because it can guide their
future behaviour. For instance, if the
wife has been calling in sick for her
husband and she feels guilty about
lying to his boss, acknowledging that
is the first step toward changing that
behaviour.
Sometimes just having the
opportunity to state how they feel
about things can be therapeutic for
family and friends. They should focus
on using “I statements” and taking
responsibility for their own feelings
and behaviour, though.
When dealing with an alcoholic, it
is easy to get sucked into their
114
behaviour. It is important for family
and friends to take responsibility for
their own behaviour and reactions to
the alcoholic’s behaviour. When they
tell the alcoholic that they will no
longer support his or her drinking
behaviour, the alcoholic will often
respond defensively.
This step can be difficult for family
and friends, as well. While it is critical
that they stop supporting the
alcoholic’s behaviour for their own
mental health, they may find it hard to
do so. For instance, the wife who
calls in sick for her husband may feel
guilty if she refuses to do so. She
may feel she is abandoning her
husband when he needs her help.
She may even feel responsible if he
loses his job.
SUPPORT YOUR SPOUSE
Although sometimes this kind of
situation requires a lot of tough love,
it's essential for you to support your
spouse at this time. Overcoming an
alcohol addiction is not easy at all.
Without your support, your spouse
could easily relapse, wonder why
they should even try or become
discouraged. Remind them of the
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
great things in your life and how
much you love them. This will be the
fuel they need to get through this and
come out the other side as a clean
and sober person.
This is one of the most difficult
parts of dealing with an alcoholic.
The alcoholic is almost certainly
going to resist getting treatment.
While this is the point of the
alcoholism intervention, unfortunately
most interventions do not convince
the alcoholics that they need
treatment. However, some will agree
to get help just to satisfy their family
and friends. Treatment is most
effective when the alcoholic goes
because he or she wants to, not
because he or she feels forced.
However, when dealing with an
alcoholic, sometimes you have to
take what you can get. Once in
treatment, the alcoholic may realise
he or she does indeed have a
problem and treatment may be
successful.
Dealing with an alcoholic spouse
is very painful and difficult. Don't
neglect yourself at this time! Find
support so that you can stay strong
enough to help your spouse get
through this. We
CHURCHILL’S WIT
The funny side of Britain’s World War II
Prime Minister. By Smita Shenoy
ir Winston Churchill was
S
a great statesman,
Nobel Prize winner and
an artist. His speeches
are world famous and
have played a great role
in immortalising him in
the annals of history. As
the late US President
John F. Kennedy said in
1963, while conferring upon him an
honorary citizenship of the United
States, "He mobilised the English
language and sent it into battle."
One of the greatest qualities
Churchill had in abundance was the
ability to laugh at himself. One day,
during World War II, he visited a
naval base to observe the Asdik anti-
submarine defence system in action.
As Churchill watched, the system
located a wreckage site and after a
huge underwater explosion, several
pieces of wreckage were fished out.
Among them was a door emblazoned
with the letters “W C” (abbreviation
for water closet which is how the
English term their lavatory). "The
navy always knew," Churchill later
quipped, "how to pay proper
compliments." After all, WC also
stands for Winston Churchill, hence
the jesting comment by him.
To any sarcastic comment or
question thrown at him he always
had an equally cutting response
ready. One of the most famous
anecdotes where he demonstrates
this quality involves George Bernard
Shaw. Shaw once sent Winston
Churchill a note inviting him to the
debut performance of his play Saint
Joan: "One for yourself and one for a
friend – if you have one." He
enclosed two tickets: Unable to
attend, Churchill replied to express
his regrets and to ask whether he
might have tickets for the second
night – "if there is one."
Churchill also knew how to deliver
sarcastic comments with a straight
face as if it was the most serious
thing in the world to say. His rivalry
with fellow British Prime Minister
Stanley Baldwin is well known. On
one occasion Churchill said about
Baldwin with perfect seriousness, “He
occasionally stumbled over the truth
but hastily picked himself up and
hurried on as if nothing had
happened."
His rivalry with Clement Atlee was
also quite famous and Churchill
never missed an opportunity to pay
Atlee a back-handed compliment. He
once called Atlee "a sheep in sheep's
clothing" – and, on another occasion,
"a modest man, who has much to be
modest about."
STRAIGHT FORWARD
Churchill was equally straight-
forward with members of the opposite
sex and loved to get the last word in
any argument. One day, Nancy Astor
was discussing women's rights with
Winston Churchill, a man not noted
for his fondness for the subject. At
the height of their disagreement,
Lady Astor finally exclaimed,
"Winston, if I were married to you, I
would put poison in your coffee!"
"And if you were my wife," he dryly
replied, "I'd drink it."
On another occasion, Winston
Churchill exchanged heated remarks
with a female MP at a dinner party
one evening. "Mr Churchill," the lady
finally snapped, "you are drunk."
"And you, madam, are ugly,"
Churchill responded. "But I shall be
sober tomorrow."
He was also gracious in his
compliments to the fair sex. On a visit
to the USA one year, Winston
Churchill attended a buffet luncheon
at which cold fried chicken was
among the dishes served. Churchill,
delighted, returned for a second
helping.
"May I have some breast?" he
asked politely. "Mr Churchill," his
hostess replied, "in this country we
ask for white meat or dark meat."
Churchill apologised profusely and,
the following morning, sent the
woman a magnificent orchid with an
accompanying note. "I would be most
obliged," it read, "if you would pin this
on your white meat."
Winston’s ready wit never
deserted him even in moments of
sadness or dejection.
His capacity to see humour even
in the gravest situation earned him
many fans. Once he was defeated in
his bid for re-election as prime
minister. His wife tried to console him
by saying that the defeat was really a
blessing in disguise. "If so," Churchill
replied, "it (the blessing) is very
effectively disguised."
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Advancing age could not wither
his repartee. Once, a photographer
present at Churchill's 80th birthday
expressed the hope that he might
also photograph the great man on his
100th birthday 20 years later. "I don't
see why not, young man," Churchill
replied. "You look reasonably fit to
me."
Even when he was unwell
Winston Churchill’s sense of humour
was at its peak. As he approached
his 90th birthday, he was asked the
secret of longevity. "Sport," he
replied. As people thought he meant
that he had spent his entire life
playing hectic sports which led to his
long life, he stumped them by saying,
“I never, ever got involved in sports.”
Upon his death in 1965, The
Guardian newspaper gave him a
fitting obituary. It wrote, “In Winston
Churchill has died the greatest
Englishman of his time, full of years
and honour.” We
117
 hanthi Cauvery Prabhakar,

S
a senior dietician with wide
experience in this profession
and attached to a renowned
hospital for the last two
years, is crystal clear in her
view that cucumber salad,
green sprouted gram mixed
vegetable, raw cabbage,
spring salad and corn salads
are a must especially for people, who
are over 45. Without mincing words,
Mrs Cauvery would suggest tomato,
dal , mixed vegetable soup,
mushroom and palak are the best
five soups for vegetarians and
corianders chicken, chicken, mutton,
sweet corn and palak chicken soups
are the five best for non-vegetarians.
As far as fruits are concerned, Mrs
Prabhakar would eat papaya salad,
mixed fruit, apple, guava and
pineapple.
When it comes to proteins,
vegetarians without any hesitation
can take vegetarian dal , sprouted
grams, paneer , mushrooms and
protein, whereas the non-vegetarians
according to her can opt for egg
white, chicken and fish.

HEALTH DIET
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Diverse views converge on
what comprises a healthy diet.
By K. V. Venugopal
 Everything is all right, but what is on our preparation. For example,
her suggestion for people who are many people would prefer eating
above 45? “Papaya is the best fruit uppama, a famous south Indian dish
for elderly people and alternatively by preparing it in various ways like
they can take apple and guava,” she rice uppama, bread uppama and so
says and further asserts that a on. “Raita and sooji items would suit
balanced diet is important for people even people who are above 45,” says
who are above 45. Since life itself is she.
sedentary, exercise is a must for both As far as soups are concerned,
vegetarians and non-vegetarians. It Vanitha says she would suggest any
is wrongly perceived that one has to soup, but when asked to name the
take heavy food after every exercise. five best soups, she said tomato,
Most importantly, the non- vegetable, sweetcorn, sweetcorn
vegetarians must ensure that the skin chicken (for non-vegetarians), dal
is removed from the chicken. mahogani, green peas clear soup (for
What fish would she suggest for patients) and carrot, but would not
non-vegetarians? “Undoubtedly small suggest Maggie in the long run. She
fish is good and it is better to avoid also rules out fast foods.
fatty fish.” According to her, fried When it comes to proteins, animal
items are not required and curry, food would suit non-vegetarians. Can
steamed food, boiled vegetables and she name a few?
raw salads are good. She also Yes, she said and named fish and
suggests shunning carbonated eggs. “But, of late, people started
beverages. treating egg as a vegetarian item,”
she laughs and went on to add that
two types of fish, namely, preserved
DIETARY TIPS and fresh fish, would suit non-
What is her suggestion for juices? vegetarians and preserved fish,
“Always look for fresh juices,” she would ideally suit the people who are
reminds the readers. Can she name, over 45. She would, however, advise
the best five? ”Carrot, pomegranate, eggless cake for asthma patients.
apple, mixed fruit punch and Vanitha insists that people should
mosumbi juice,” she answers readily. opt for fresh food with an emphasis
What are the five milkshakes she on milk and milk products, as it
would suggest for our readers?
Coconut milk, pomegranate milk,
banana milk, milk, apple and soya
milk. Soya milk contains rich proteins,
which will suit people, who are over
45.
Vanitha Shekhar, a dietician, who
was associated with Naturopathy
Hospital for two years, opines when it
comes to salads, vegetables and
sprouted pulses are the best and it
should contain both green leaves and
tube roots. Raw carrots and carrot
cucumber are good but she would
not suggest carrots for diabetic
patients.
There are two categories of
vitamins: fat-soluble and water-
soluble. “Fat-soluble vitamins reduce
your fat,” says Vanitha and adds that
wheat items are generally good for
health. For instance, ragi can keep a
person healthy for 20 years. She is of
the opinion that everything depends
 contains vitamins.
Boiled vegetable
augurs well and
“WE MANAGE keeping items for
hours together in the
TO EAT AROUND fridge and boiling them
THE SAME BUT suddenly hampers one’s
health. “Whether you like it
THE ONLY or lump it, you need to take at least
DIFFERENCE IS eight glasses of water a day, but not
THAT I TAKE between meals, including for people
who are over 45.
CHICKEN SOUP When it comes to fruits, Vanitha
AND SHE OPTS without battling an eyelid would
suggest apple, banana, orange,
FOR TOMATO jackfruit, dates, kismiss and mango.
SOUP.” For mango, it is better if people take
mangoshake than the fruit as it
contains more vitamins. Likewise,
she would suggest the inside portion
of jackfruit and the side portion of
orange. These fruits would ideally
suit people who are over 45.
67-year-old Bhatnagar, who is
120 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
working in a courier
company on a
retainership basis,
said even at this age he
maintains a balanced
diet and his 61-year-old
wife Rohini, follows in his
footsteps in leading a
healthy life. “I am a non-
vegetarian, but my wife is a strict
vegetarian, but, despite our age, we
manage to remain fit,” says the man
with a sense of humour and adds that
the couple is fitness-savvy. He,
however, maintains that one has to
be particular about the time factor.
Could he describe his and his wife’s
eating schedules? “We manage to
eat around the same but the only
difference is that I take chicken soup
and she opts for tomato soup.”
HEALTHY LIFE-STYLE
He went on to add that bread and
butter with salad for breakfast makes
them comfortable. What do they do
for lunch? “A mixture of rice and
wheat, a typical lunch with which
Maharashtrians whet their appetite.”
And what about their dinner? A roti-
dal -vegetable combination settles
them for a sound sleep.
Of course, they admit that for a
change they go for idlis or dosas for
breakfast and a sumptuous lunch
laced with oily stuff. But in general,
Bhatnagar said that they stick to their
normal food. “Without fruits after
dinner, it looks like a ship without a
rudder for us,” he laughs.
Dr Parthasarathy cited the
example of the late C.
Rajagopalachari, affectionately called
Rajaji and the first governor-general
of India, whose brain America wanted
to experiment with after his death.
According to him, the elderly
statesman always cleaned the leaves
after having his rice items to ensure
that the subsequent sweet and fruit
items did not get spoiled.
The genius also commented that
every person has more or less the
capacity to choose the items which
he or she could cherish, but most of
them do not go according to their
preferences. We
 A Question of Purity
A short story with an intriguing end.
By Gayatri T Rao

P
uneet looked at Pavithra and his eyes softened. felt pity for her and paid the fine myself. Then I
Pavithra was his subordinate in the human brought them home. My wife had already had a
resources department of an MNC located in paralytic attack. Pavithra was helpful in taking care
Chennai. He had been trying to catch her of her, so we adopted her legally since we were
attention for long, not as a boss, but in a very childless. I don’t know where she is from or what
personal sort of way. Pavithra looked a typical caste she belongs to. She requested me to put her in
South Indian girl regularly wearing a sari. The a good school since she had been studying in a
flower and garlands that she wore on her hair convent school before. Eventually, she did her MA
attracted him. However, Pavithra had not responded and MBA and went to work in the MNC where your
like any other girl would. Finally, he made his move.
“Pavithra, I would like to marry you.”
To which Pavithra replied, “My mother is a
paralytic patient. My life is dedicated to taking care
of her.”
“Will you stay unmarried all through your life for
your mother?”
She just smiled and left his cabin.
Being the MD, Puneet Purushottaman had access
to Pavithra Jayakanthan’s CV. He found out her
address and sent his parents with a marriage
proposal. He was confident that her parents would
accept his proposal.
When his parents reached Pavithra’s home, they
met her parents.
Pavithra’s father, Jayakanthan, introduced them to
his wife, who was sitting on her bed.
“We bring our son’s marriage proposal for your
daughter, Pavithra,” said Purushottaman. “My son
studied from the 8th grade in the USA living with his
uncle. But he missed Indian culture and would not
intermingle with the girls there. He did not like
their having affairs with any and every boy.
He liked Indian girls, so he got a transfer
back to Chennai.”
“Sir, if that is the case then you should
know a truth about Pavithra,”
Jayakanthan said. “She is not our child.
I met her when she was 14, about 10
years ago, as she landed in Chennai
Central Railway Station, without a
ticket with her eight-month-old brother,
Kunal. She was scared and crying. I
son came to work recently. Now we can
afford to have a nurse to take care of my
wife only because of Pavithra.”
“She is not my daughter, she is my
mother,” Mrs Jayakanthan, who was
sitting on her bed, partly healed, put in.
“We do not have any objection if your son
wants to marry her.”
Mrs Purushottaman happily started
arranging the shagun items on a plate.
“But I can’t marry your son,” this was
Pavithra herself.
“Why, beta? You are getting a very
good life. Why are you throwing it
away?” Mrs Jayakanthan asked.
“There is one truth that nobody
including you both, know about me,” Pavithra
looked at her mother. “The child you think my
brother is actually my son!”
Everybody looked at her shell-shocked.
“When I was 13, I made a big mistake in life.
We were living in Delhi then. Without knowing
about the repercussions, I had an affair with a boy
in my school. Kunal was the result. When I realised
that I was pregnant, it was too late to abort. My
mother and I
Being the MD, were thrown
out of our
SHORT
Puneet
STORY
Purushottaman house since we belonged to a
had access to conservative South Indian family.
We left Delhi and set off for
Pavithra Mumbai. When we got down at
Jayakanthan’s Mumbai Central, from the very
CV. He found little my mother knew about
out her address Mumbai, we got into a local train
and sent his and went to Nalla Sopara. As we
parents with a reached that station, we went to
marriage the west side and walked aimlessly
proposal. towards a slum area there. An old
lady was selling bhajias there. The
moment we saw the bhajias, we
were hungry. We used whatever little
money we had to buy some of the eatables.
“Then my mother requested the old woman to
help us with shelter. The old woman told us to stay
with her since she lived alone. We would help her
out with her business. There I gave birth to Kunal.
The old lady may have been very sympathetic to our
condition but not the other people in the slum. The
boys in the area would tease me and had a
crooked eye on me. My mother died of a
heartbreak since she could not give me a
safe and protected place to stay. Before
dying, she asked the old woman to
promise that she would give me and my
son safety. But the old woman told me to
run away from that place since she was
not in a condition to protect me. She told
me to introduce my son as my brother for
my safety.
“I caught a train and reached here.
You know the rest of my story. Your son is
looking for a pure girl. I am not worthy of
him. And I can’t leave my son. I can’t
subject him to the torturous life I’ve had for
no fault of his,” Pavithra finished her
narrative.
“Mr Purushottaman, this is a question of
purity,” Jayakanthan said. “You can
understand though Pavithra made a
mistake early in life, she has suffered a
lot. You cannot say that she is impure,
either. Purity comes from the heart.”
“Now I do not know what to say. I am
tongue-tied. But it is up to my son. We will
abide by his decision,” Purushottaman
replied, as the guests got up.
When the Purushottaman couple had
turned around and were going towards
the gate, Jayakanthan could see a couple
of question marks behind them. We
 LATEST
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124 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009


Amazon Kindle: If you are a
booklover, it is time to get yourself
equipped with this latest gizmo to
emerge from the ensemble of the
online giant Amazon. With the
Amazon Kindle you are going to have
access to thousands of books,
newspapers or magazines. The
device is just 1/3 of an inch and it
weighs merely 10.2 ounces, which
makes it lighter than a typical
paperback. It is outfitted with 3G
technology and that gives it the ability
to seamlessly download material
from www.amazon.com. Under
normal circumstances it might take
you about 60 seconds to download
the latest bestseller or the latest hot
magazine. The best thing about the
Kindle is that it has enough space to
hold 1500 books. That must sound
like a hefty library, but it is a library
that you can carry with you wherever
you go! And if you don’t want to strain
your eyes, the Kindle offers you a
way to start using your ears for the
reading purpose. It is incorporated
with a new text-to-speech feature that
will read out every page to you. The
bottom line is that if you are a reading
buff, you simply can’t do without the
Kindle.
Sony Series T - DSC-T90/T:
Honey, I shrunk the camera! Sony
has done it yet again, the latest
stylish camera to emerge from the
ensemble of this tech-behemoth, the
Series T - DSC-T90/T, turns out to
be ultra-slim, at a mere 5/8 inches. It
is a perfect fit for your pocket or a
small ladies’ handbag. In its petite
frame, all sorts of powerful features
are incorporated that make it so easy
to snap professional-quality pictures.
But that is just what you should
expect from this power-packed 12.1-
megapixel system. There is the
Intelligent Auto Mode, called iAuto
that will automatically enable you to
pick up the mode that will yield best
photo quality. Then there are features
like Smile Shutter, Face Detection
and Optical SteadyShot that make
the rigmarole of capturing the perfect
shot seem so easy. And once you
have clicked the perfect shot, the
wide 3.0 (7.6 cm) LCD touchscreen
poses as an ideal place to view it.
Sony Ericsson W705: This sleek
and stylish phone from Sony is totally
geared to jazz up the mobile
entertainment experience for its
users. The W705 is an out and out
music-centric phone whose
technological zeitgeist lies in
delivering ultra-lucid audio quality.
Your favorite songs are available at
the touch of a button. And if you want
have a peek at popular clips on
YouTube™ and video podcasts then
that too turns out to be absurdly
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
simple – just one click in standby and
you are online. The phone supports
Wi-Fi and 3G networks. If anything,
the 320×240 pixel 262K TFT QVGA
display is good enough to watch
music videos in most vibrant colours.
In situations where you want to shoot
pictures and videos, the phone’s 3.2-
megapixel camera poses as a good
option. The internal memory is of 120
MB, which can be expanded up to
4GB.
ITouch: When the iPod and the
iPhone come together, what do you
get? It’s an iTouch. The innovative
new gizmo from the ensemble of
Apple features a multi-touch
interface, a large 3.5-inch display,
that lets you control everything using
only your fingers. Gliding through
albums with Cover Flow has never
been so easy; you can flick through
photos and enlarge them with a
pinch. A touch-screen QWERTY
keyboard is perfect for browsing the
web. Search for videos, find music
on the iTunes music store or add new
contacts.
Nokia 5700 Xpressmusic: So
you wish to turn your mobile phone
125
into a MP3 music player or a
camera? Just twist the lower half of
the phone’s body. But that’s not the
only way by which the Nokia 5700
makes life easy for its users. It is also
blessed with a 2.2 inch 240 x 320
pixel QVGA TFT screen, which turns
out to be a real eye candy to watch
videos on. A set of dual speakers and
a 5-band equaliser with bass boost
promise crystal-clear sound. So next
time you are travelling and a whiff of
boredom catches up with you, just flip
the phone and start watching your
favourite music video.
Dell Latitude E6400 XFR
Laptop: Spare a tought for those
though women serving in the defense
forces. Think of Latitude E6400 XFR,
the new tough woman’s laptop to
emerge from the ensemble of Dell.
Embellished with an innovative
Ballistic Armor Protection System,
the XFR easily meets and even
exceeds the toughest military
standards. It has twice the impact
strength of magnesium alloy and a
higher drop-tolerance than any other
computer in its class. It also turns out
to be 90% faster than any other
computer in its class. Clearly, when
Dell does something, it does it in a
way that will leave competition far
behind. You can use the XFR in the
middle of a raging hurricane and still
expect to get away it. The state-of-
the-art PrimoSeal™ technology
makes this beast totally impervious
to minor annoyances like dirt, wind,
snow and water. But the best thing
about the XFR is that it is as smart as
it is tough. It runs on latest Intel®
Core™2 Duo Processors, it has a
126
fast-charging battery and the 14.1”
LCD screen is impact-resistant.
Microsoft Arc Mouse: The
mouse has evolved. It is now much
more versatile and feature-packed
than ever before. Equipped with a 2.4
GHz wireless USB micro-transceiver,
it has a range of up to 30 feet. So
you can even lounge on the bed and
use this mouse to operate the screen
from a distance. The much-admired
scroll wheel is there, and so is the
battery-status indicator. The best
thing about the Arc Mouse is that it is
capable of folding to 60% of its
expanded size, in order to spare
valuable space. You hardly need to
find an extra pocket to bag it; this
mouse is so small in its folded avatar
that you could even stuff it in your
jacket pocket. The superlative
ergonomic design and a one-touch
access to Windows Flip 3D are like
an icing on the cake.
Sony Ericsson Xperia X1: The
slim and easy-to-navigate Sony
Ericsson Xperia X1 comes packed
with features that make it as
desirable to music and gadget lovers,
as it is to the enterprise users. The
phone is run on a Windows
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
Operating System and its
touchscreen functions might seem a
lot like what it is in the iPhone. But in
Xperia X1, you have to use a stylus
to enter your touchscreen
commands, as the Windows icons
are really small. The Office apps
include Word, PowerPoint, OneNote
mobile, Excel mobile, and Windows
Live Messenger.
The system can also have direct
push for emails using Microsoft Direct
Push, which is built into Windows
Mobile. Then there is the state-of-the-
art music system, a 3.2 megapixel
camera and enough storage space
to store all the pictures and music
that you treasure. The phone even
boasts of a video call camera so that
you can see the other party while you
are calling them. That should seem
like a good way to keep in touch with
your family and friends while you are
on the move.
Sony Walkman: Sony’s slim and
stylish NWZ-S618FBLK Walkman
packs just about everything that you
may need to take your favourite
entertainment with you. It has a
powerful digital music player and a
spectacular 1.8” LCD screen that
promises hours of nonstop viewing
pleasure. Its eight GB drive can store
up to 5000 songs and 8 hours of
video. An added plus is the
Walkman’s versatile FM tuner
that can be preset for up to 30
channels. We
 LOST YOUR LIBIDO?
GET IT BACK
If you are feeling low because of your libido here
is how to get high again. By Vikas Kumar Jain
he last time, you were hot in
T
bed was when there was a
heat wave. And the only
thing that gets turned on
once the lights go out is the
alarm clock buzzer. Maybe
your spouse pesters you to
do the mattress dance more
than you want to. You may
even oblige, but you don’t
really want to and don’t really enjoy it.
Is there something wrong with you?
Sex therapists don’t like to play a
numbers game when talking about
frequency of intercourse and what’s
considered normal. They’re more
concerned with determining what’s
right for a couple to maintain a
healthy relationship.
If you’re in a relationship and you
make love one or two times a month
or less, that might be considered low.
But who’s to say what level of desire
is “more desirable”? Low libido
becomes a problem that should be
addressed only when it is perceived
as problem. Sex therapists say,
“It’s usually only in the
framework of a relationship that it
becomes an issue.”
It’s when there is a discrepancy in
desire between the person and the
partner, or when people feel there’s
something wrong with them because
they have a low level of desire.
Everyone experiences peaks and
troughs in sexual desire, an ebb and
flow in libido, that could be caused
by any number of factors, from a bad
childhood to a bad day to a bad
illness, from too much stress to too
little time. Occasionally, a hormonal
imbalance or prescription drug will
help to sap your sex drive.
And, of course, there’s a
difference between sexual drive and
sexual function. You may be able to
become aroused and experience
orgasms yet have little or no interest
in doing so. (That’s why seeking
professional advice from your doctor
or a qualified sex therapist is not a
bad idea if your problem persists). If
your lowered libido persists and you
perceive that you have a problem,
what can you do about it?
Symptom relief: Libido is an
appetite and it often can be very
difficult to help someone acquire the
taste for something or to
acknowledge to themselves that they
really do have a craving for some -
thing delightful. You can present
tempting foods like a luscious dessert
but that won’t necessarily help
someone who doesn’t feel like eating
or who denies himself or herself the
pleasure of eating sweets. Here’s
what therapists might suggest to
cultivate a sexy sweet tooth and put a
lilt into your libido.
Sample from the sexual spice
rack: For many couples, sex
becomes as exciting as doping the
dishes because they do the same
thing all the time. Reading a sexual
manual and trying new positions
or new techniques may add
a renewed dash of
zest to making
love.
 Don’t forget to touch: People
with low libidos are often reluctant to
express any sort of affection towards
their mates. They may believe their
gestures amount to teasing or will
spark a debate over making love, but
the loss of touch makes their partners
feel unwanted and unloved. Couple
should maintain or resume
expressions of affection — a kiss on
the cheek or lips, casual touches on
the arm or shoulder, a brush of their
hair. Both partners need to
demonstrate that they care, but with
the understanding that the display of
affection is not a signal for sex.
Read something risque: You
don’t have to don sunglasses and a
raincoat and creep into an adult book
shop, but you could read some
romance novels, love poems or erotic
literature to try to nurture or enhance
your own sensuality.
Spend an hour in the shower:
Don’t treat bath time as just a three-
minute clean-up before you dash out
of the door to work. Avail yourself of
all the sensual experiences in the
shower or bath. Feel the pleasure of
the water as it dances on your skin.
Lather yourself sensually, perhaps
with a loofah sponge rather than a
flannel. Use bath salts and slightly-
scented candles.
Let your fingers do the talking:
Take the time and pleasure to know
your own body and your partner’s
without any pressure to have
intercourse and orgasm. Focus on
the leisurely exploration of each
other’s bodies and share the joy and
intimacy of that alone. Touch each
other, feel and caress each other’s
genitals, notice the sensations of
your two bodies as they move about.
Tell each other what feels good.
Don’t hesitate to help yourself:
Sexual self-gratification is not dirty or
wrong. In fact, a person with low
libido can use masturbation to learn
what feels good to his or her body, so
that sex provides a positive instead of
a negative feedback. Practise first in
private where you won’t be self-
conscious, then broach the topic of
mutual masturbation with your
partner.
Mind over sexual matters: In
conjunction with sexual-enhancement
techniques, there are other kinds of
strategies to heighten a low libido.
You can deal with the immediate
problem of techniques, but that might
not help for ever or save a
relationship.
MORE APPROACHES
Dig yourself out of the dumps:
Depression can produce some very
physical symptoms and is one of the
most common causes of an inhibited
sex drive. When you’re depressed,
you have an interest in practically
 nothing. Certainly your libido will be
PEOPLE WITH LOW decreased too. It just flies out the
LIBIDOS ARE OFTEN window.
RELUCTANT TO EXPRESS Look in your medicine chest: A
ANY SORT OF number of prescription and over-the-
counter drugs, especially certain
AFFECTION TOWARDS types of psychiatric and anti -
THEIR MATES. THEY depressant medications and some
pills to lower high blood pressure,
MAY BELIEVE THEIR could dampen libido for both men
GESTURES AMOUNT TO and women. Some drugs also
interfere with your ability to be
TEASING OR WILL aroused. If you’re using medications
SPARK A DEBATE OVER that you think are responsible for
decreasing your sex drive, stop
MAKING LOVE, BUT taking them. Speak to your doctor
THE LOSS OF TOUCH and ask for alternative drugs.
MAKES THEIR PARTNERS Ask for help: From your spouse,
FEEL UNWANTED AND that is. At least, at first. He or she
UNLOVED. may, after all, have been the first to
note the low libido. Whether it’s
exploring each other’s sensuality,
experimenting with new positions or
trying to get in the mood more often,
explain to your spouse that you may
feel awkward, self-conscious and a
bit stressed in attempting to change,
but that you want to do it for the sake
of the relationship. Tell him or her
that you need him or her help and
understanding.
Talk to yourself or perhaps a
friend: Ask yourself why your sex
drive has taken a nosedive. Has it
always been that way? What was
happening in your life and
relationship when it veered? Mull it
over in your head, and then talk to
your partner, a friend or a family
member who knows you well. They
may help to spark some insight.
Take time to address your
stress: He works, she works. He’s
tired at the end of the day, she
comes home late several evenings a
week. The kids have homework that
needs to be checked. The ambition to
excel professionally, the demands of
raising children, the need to maintain
social connections — all these
stresses put the brakes on the sex
drive. That can out you in a state of
apathy when it comes to sex.
None of these everyday,
130 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
every-week worries leaves much
time, ambition or emotional energy
for making love. You may need to
give sex higher priority in their
relationship. Try making a date with
your partner. Not just to make love,
but to talk to each other, hold each
other and share your feelings and
concerns about each other. That may
help to restore your sexual interest.
HELP FOR THOSE
HORMONES
It’s also entirely possible that your
libido is being K.O’d by a hormone
imbalance in the body. Here’s what
you should consider:
Deal openly with the meno-
pause: Some women may notice a
declining interest in sex during
menopause. It’s a common side-effect
while the body is trying to adjust.
Oestrogen-replacement therapy can
help return your libido to normal. Once
the unpleasant symptoms of the
menopause have stopped, the drive
returns and could even be enhanced.
If you are going through the
menopause, ask your doctor about
hormone replacement therapy.
Wait out the pregnant pause:
Hormonal changes during pregnancy,
especially the last trimester and
lactation often can dampen the drive
for sex. Hormones are present in
different levels at these times. Loss
of libido immediately after childbirth
and during lactation is nature’s way
of spacing children.
Test your testosterone levels: If
you’re a man who seemingly has no
psychological reason for a lack of
desire, you may want to ask your
doctor about having a blood test to
measure your body’s level of
testosterone. Low levels of the male
hormone aren’t a common cause of
sapping your sexuality, but it always
must be suspected. Depending on
the cause, a doctor could prescribe
either testosterone injections or a
medication that counteracts other
hormones that are suppressing
naturally-occurring testosterone. We
 QA &
Q&
When my younger brother declared
that he was a homosexual our
household underwent a lot of tension.
Finally my parents accepted his
declaration and the fact that he will
never marry. He now lives in another
city with his lover. My other sister is
now getting married and my brother
says he will attend only if my parents
allow his ‘partner’ as well. He expects
my support but I don’t know what to
do.
Yes, you have a valid point
because accepting your child’s
sexually different behaviour is one
thing for old parents but to see him
with his male partner while the family
members are there is quite another.
Tell your brother that he should not
A
either be so rigid as he might have
‘come out of closet’ this family gathe-
ring is more about your youngest
sister’s wedding and should be given
due sanctity.
My girlfriend is 10 years older to me.
Can I marry her? We love each other
very much. Her parents know about
us. But mine don't. How shall I
convince them? Please let me know.
You have not mentioned your age
but if you are of legally marriageable
age then you can marry her. As for
convincing your parents, it is not
going to be easy as 10 years
difference is rather a lot for parents to
ignore. However, if you love the girl
and are sure of your maturity you can
still go ahead, get married and hope
that your parents will accept you.
I am a housewife but my elder sister
is working in a MNC at a very senior
post. I visited her home for a
weekend and was horrified how badly
her husband treats her and does not
help out with any household chore
and yet expects her to wait upon him.
I don’t work and yet my husband
helps me in house work and baby
care. How do I make my sister
understand her husband is using
her?
You are lucky if you have an
understanding husband who helps
you out in your home duties even
though you are at home and not
working. Your sister obviously is
smart enough to hold down a job that
pays her well. You can mention to
I have 2 daughters
aged 5 and 2 1/2
years. Please advise
me on the healthy
food that I could give
them. Is it okay for
them to eat chocolates (I am very
strict about eating chocolates and
also drinking cold water)? On the
whole they are active but my
younger one hasn't gained weight
as per her age.
While it is good to be a
disciplinarian there is nothing to
be gained by total denial. Let your
daughters eat chocolate but in
moderation and always caring for
the teeth by brushing them
afterwards. If your younger
daughter seems too thin for her
age, it is best to consult a child
specialist. Every child is different
in their metabolism and maybe
she is just built different to her
elder sister, don’t worry about it
too much.
Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009
your sister your concern and
observations but it is up to her
judgement as to the treatment she is
willing to tolerate from her husband.
I am 15 years old girl. Recently I
have found that my boobs are not in
proper shape. When I am lying down
straight my boobs fall on sides also
they are tender and soft. Are there
any oil and cream massages to make
them firm?
At the age of 15 your body is still
growing but if you feel your breasts
are loose you should exercise. There
are no creams or oils to make
breasts firm and you really would be
wasting time and money on that. Get
yourself the right fit of the bra as well
to give ample support to your
breasts.
I am 25 years old and I am in love
with a Brahmin boy for the past 3
years. His parents are not agreeing
to our marriage and he won’t go
against his family. My parents have
now got me engaged to a guy from
my caste.
As I have dosha in my kundali and
it says I might never get married my
parents have forced me into this
engagement. I never liked this guy
from day one and finding it difficult to
accept him. I hate it when he calls
me and can’t stand him. There is still
5 months for our wedding. What shall
I do?
Whatever you do, don’t marry a
man you absolutely hate. You have
to face to the facts that your Brahmin
love has definitely decided not to
marry you.
Don’t punish another man for that.
Tell your parents that you cannot go
through this marriage, you will regret
it for the rest of your life.
Hopefully, you are a new
generation girl and do not believe in
kundalis, etc. Do you feel confident of
finding somebody on your own later,
if not, then see if you can
compromise with the man selected
by your parents. If you cannot stand
him now, how will you make a family
life with him?
115
 WIN UP TO
Winners of Crossword - 155
Rs15,000 IN CASH PRIZES

Shashi Sharma, Noida. Priya, Jeypore. Balwant Singh, Patiala.

Kalpana Shet Nikita S. Man

ty, Bangalore. CA. Rekha Devanand, Udupi. tri, Mumbai.

Preethi Balge, Geeta Anand

Ahmedabad. Simmi D’sa, Mumbai. Kulkarni, Kolh
apur.

Shahida Hasan Jasbeer Sodh

, Gorakhpur. Nidhi Bakshi, Jaipur. i, Secunderab
ad.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 135

158 Crossword
F A M
CWinners
I
O Nof Crossword
TES
L

- 155
T
Y P H O T O

Delhi. Faizabad.
Renu Sethi, N
ew Payal Kathuria, Raipur. Lt. Pushplata,

Radha Dutt, G
urgaun. vi, Satara.
C. P. Sasikumar, Cochin. Sunayana Dal

, Farldabad. Sushma Behl, Jammu. r, Jabalpur.

Kuldeep Kaur Rinki Panesa

annad, Goa. P., Nandej.

Dinesh M. Trik Pradeep Kumar Sharma, Delhi. Deepti Bahen

136 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009

 WIN UP TO
Rs15,000 IN CASH PRIZES

Winners of Crossword - 155 Rules and Regulations

A prize of Rs 15,000 will
be given to the person
sending an all-correct
solution. In case there are
more than one sender of an
all-correct solution, the prize
amount will be divided
among the first 30
competitors chosen by lot.
Sandra Dutt,
Bangalore. Mirza Da Costa, Goa. The decision of the manage-
ment will be final and
binding. Entries must be on
the crossword printed here.
Photocopies will not be
accepted.
Entries must be sent so
as to reach Woman’s Era
by 31 August 2009, by
ordinary post. No corres -
pondence in this matter will
Vidhi Kavdia,
be entertained.
Udaipur. Dr G. Sirisha, Guntur. The contest is not open
to the employees of Delhi
Press. Every entry should
be accompanied by the
sender’s family photo. If you
are declared a winner, your
family picture may be
printed in the oncoming
issue. Please send a signed
declaration that you have
no objection to printing your
Budhdeo Pd family picture.
Singh, Ghaziab S. C. Sharma, New Delhi.
ad.

Answers to Crossword-155

n w in
Across: 1. Commission,
6. Nought, 9. Pan, 11. Avert,
w i o rd
12. Instil, 13. TM, 14. Clip,
15. Tram, 16. Dot, 17. CN,
18. Mac, 21. TB, 22. Campaign, n
i ur w
23. Due, 24. Tribe
W yo wer
Down: 1. Can
didate, 2. Mou
3. Sit, 4. Nap
e, 5. Oin
rliam en t,
tm
10
en
.
ssake,
t,
Art,
o n p o
7. Hair, 8. Pa
. DC, 19. Tat,
14. Candid, 16 Di
Tu b, 22. Bee, 23.
20. Ape, 21.

Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 137


Q&
When we switch on iron, can one
garment alone be ironed?
Don’t use iron for one garment
only. It consumes a lot of power. While
ironing, press some clothes always.
My TV had developed fault after a
few months of use. How many days
will it take for my complaint to be
heard by the dealer?
Write to both the dealer and
company and ask for after-sales
service or replacement of the
television. If they don’t take heed of
your complaint in 15 days, a
consumer court can be approached.
I live near a multiplex. The
A
shopkeeper selling soft drinks in our
area charges us higher, because he
says the multiplex also asks more
from customers. Therefore, he asks
us to pay Rs 20-30 extra. Is he right?
A multiplex, mall or airport is
allowed to charge more for soft
drinks, because the bottles carry
words like “select channels” and
“retail,” on them. The locality
shopkeeper sells soft drinks which
don’t carry these printed words.
Hence, he can’t charge Rs 20-30
extra. If he persists, a fine of Rs
2,000 can be imposed.
My daughter is to enter college. We
want an education loan quickly. How
many days would it take for loan to
be given?
You can get education loan in 30
days.
MONEY MATTERS
Q Q
I go on frequent business trips. Are
air fares cheaper in evening? I want
to save money on flights.
Take afternoon flights – they are
most economical.
What does pure zari contain?
According to the Bureau of Indian
Standards, pure zari has minimum
50% silver, 0.5% gold and also
Q
copper, at permissible levels.
I have been wanting to purchase gold
coins, but there is one small query.
Would the coins cost the same at all
banks?
No, there can be a difference
between gold coins at different
banks. For example, if you want to
purchase a 5 gm gold coin at one
bank, the coin may cost less than
Rs.600-700 than at another bank. It
is advisable that prices at different
banks are checked, before buying the
Q
smallest gold coin, also.
Though my car has a warranty,
somebody said that I have to be
careful about parts like the clutch.
What does it mean?
The car warranty covers parts,
and generally excludes wear and
tear. Therefore, if the clutch plate is
pressed heavily many times, it may
break. The car dealer can escape
giving compensation, on ground of
bad usage.
To avoid such situations, car parts
like battery, tyres and oil filter must
Q
be delicately handled.
Do I have to show a lot of
documentary proof to open a simple
savings account?
You would be glad to know that
according to new RBI rules, just an
affidavit and a photograph are
essential for starting an ordinary
savings account.
Should I go in for fans with six
blades, to cool my rooms?
A fan with six blades does not
create a cooling effect. As there are
so many blades, the space constraint
prevents the fan from circulating air.
Q
Should I get valuation of my
ornaments done before putting them
in a bank locker?
A valuation certificate of
ornaments is always desirable. For
safeguarding jewellery against bank
locker theft and also for insurance
purposes, the valuation document is
a great asset. You can also get
pictures of jewellery taken before
Q
putting them in a bank locker.
Can light brightness be altered, to
reduce the power bill?
Yes, you can use a light dimmer.
For example, when bright light is not
required, the dimmer cuts off extra
shine. Thus, voltage is reduced,
lowering the electricity bill. It is
estimated, when a light dimmer is
utilised for cutting off 50%
brightness, as much as 40% of the
Q
power bill comes down.
I want to sell products at Internet
shopping sites. What kind of items
can be considered? Is the investment
large?
One can sell apparel, jewellery,
books at websites. The investment is
very low. Just Rs.1,000 may be
enough.
E-mail your queries to:
money@womansera.com
Meenakshi Subramaniam
is a former IRS officer, answering all
your money queries, right from income
tax to supermarket shopping.
Mail your queries to:
●
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Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009 145
 served as a minister at the Centre. remains so powerful in our heart and
There is no doubt Meira with her soul that we hardly bother to analyse
rich parliamentary experience the detailed characteristic of duping
coupled with her pleasant manne - elements. Instead of pointing fingers
risms, would prove herself worthy of at any authority or sect, let’s evaluate
the august seat she occupies now as to how effectively can we
and thereby pave the way for her to contribute to improve the scenario.
be the automatic choice of both the – M.P.S. Chadha, Mohali.
ruling as well as the opposition
parties to succeed Pratibha Patil, the
incumbent President when she TTERS
WOMEN WERE AT
MONEY MA
completes her five year term of office document
car purchase
?
First, you
papers safely
important

and bank
financial
How shouldlike house registratiobe unused mobile
s, deals,

preserved should keep the original charged, not

and take
printouts.
n, one

es
Store the
and cool
mobiles but
I have two present. How can
for the
be kept in

fully, but

green label
want to use

unused mobile keep it

that,
place. Beforeat 40 per cent.

gas stoves?
the
fine order?
in a dry

how much?
Do
THE RECEIVING
LET TRUE LOVE
have three
photocopi What are and, if so,

END OF LIC
Secondly, to your save LPG stove is
one copy and they green label gas .
made. Give your parents A oil companies
another to from leading taking a new
husband, available you are

Q&
for yourself.
retain one for it when to buy another

in the Raisina Hills.

plan, Ask n or wish
daily hospital cash by connectio green label stove’s
What is the been launched stove. The is 68 per in a
cent,
which has ? thermal
efficiency
cent present of
a higher companies cash plan, to 64 per
have to pay insurance
daily hospital premium compared
A Bureau
Does a woman taking a life insurance Under a gas appliance. is
while an insurance for each normal Standards certificate
premium to a man? can pay green

PREVAIL
to you get cover Indian firms. The
a fact of policy compared required month and home. For handed out by oil a warranty
of
it. Sex is A woman
is always than every in a nursing with Rs stove carries to one year of
et’s face premium day spent buy a plan to stay label gas
today increasing insurance

L
life. But and pay a lower applies to all insuring example, if you have years, compared The green
liberation in a man. This per day and get Rs 2,000 three gas stove. more LPG
sexual
have resultedand 2,000 limit ordinary

– Yvonne Fernando, Chennai.

. hospital, you entire stay’s an five per cent

A woman is never
tolerance
ional practices
companies 10 days in , for the stove saves one.
orienta - to my sister. = Rs.20,000
unconvent
d sexual to give a loan Income Tax x 10 than a normal s
encourage were once I may have under the If expenses. advantage
tions that to be Is cash allowed allowed? water is jewellery bestow?
d taboo only cheques find out whether Are there credit cards
considere a number Act? Or, are given, how much money How can we women’s on
by quite be to milk? of which get discounts a
accepted cash can being added test is to put a drop If You can fees. There’s
t on extended? loan. locker
of people. can be can give
a cash The simple surface. at which
passing
judgemen in
t Yes, you to Rs polished slanting a jewellerydiscounte d rate
Without experimen amount is
restricted milk on a it would leave buying gold.
prefer to But, the This is milk is impure, won’t specialwould be given for
those who this liberal in one year. if pure, it
affairs, 269T the trail behind. But, loans
their sexualbehaviour could lead s
to 20,000 only Sections 269S, deodorant
s

I refer to the article,

white colour behind. whether
stated under the Income Tax Act.

allowed lower life

attitude and leave a white to know

A
ces if parameter genuine.
of that I want at a discount are
serious consequen safe sexual and 269TT
my , I find offered costing Rs
le and loan. But several occasions paid on deodorant
for Rs 85,
to pleasurabnot observed and
met.
take a car t for On bills were Where the
are with the I intend to buy hi-fi equipmen credit card charged
me being given away is
activities true though bank 150 is deodorant
is also proper desire is
to car financier the last day, the can be done? don’t buy.
A genuine price.
The same lacking Would the What such a cheap
general
public
appreciati
on o the car also. for the whole amount Rs 100 extra. bill, when paid on the never offered at
ding and loan
standard provide a system? A credit card because
understan issues and the new electronic the vehicle, may invite charges to be
sexual healthlead to neglect of including is given for not extend last day, s may have days queries to:
A car loan

STDs
which could full transaction pay four E-mail your
sexual rights. financier would equipmen t the You should omansera
.com
should b alone. The new checked. make an
online money@w

STDs Spoilers in Sex

partners’ encounter for cheque or m

insurance premium.
Every sexual responsible attitud money
. early by of
Subramania all
a Meenakshi answering
coupled with can result in unwant installation in payment. charges IRS officer, from income

SPOILERS
of it be opened penal is a former
The lack lead to emotio fixed deposit or must I go in
Thus,
time can
be avoided. queries, right
that may ons, Should a Rs 100 every your money t shopping.
pregnancy ical complicatithe ch child’s name If some tax to supermarke to:
and psycholog also my minor Fund scheme? taxed? Mail your queries
parents but for a Public
Provident
transfer allowanceunspent, what
only for the sex also exposes se woman. but a Is
'S ERA,
WOMAN Rani Jhansi Marg,

WHY MARRIAGES
d
Unprotecte high risk of contrac I am a working be surprised, money
remains
Estate,

IN SEX
to a dise You would more profitable. If you happens? is not E-3, Jhandewala Delhi-110055.
partners transmitted is allowance New
PPF account the child’s No, transfer
chronic sexually
a fixed deposit, unspent amount
invest in to your But mention
Even be added in taxed.

Lives (June II). I

(STDs).
Do not be
deceived. money wouldyear and taxed. But,

On the contrary until a

besid in your return.

LIVES
healthy person a se income every there is no tax. (First) 2009
seemingly with option, Era ● June
afflicted a PPF Woman’s
can be without y
d disease
transmitte
knowing it. p
that person STDs may
Though some , most ST
of the

SUCH EXPENSIVE
Many forms life obvious symptoms
asymptom
atic infectionssigns
that

disease make
noticeable can b
show
. Thus, they
couples. symptoms infection. Thes

sincerely feel the difficult for

few years after nationalisation in

the “silent”
be diagnosed
can only
Kumar Jain
By Vikas

absence of real love AFFAIR? 1956, women insured had to pay

and affection that has to be the sweet
blender in the lives of married couple,
M
WHAT GO

EXTRAVAGAN
complexities
of a mode
IAL
I fully agree with the
MATRIMON ZAS
views expressed by K.
The multifa
rious

rn Hindu
marriage
ES INTO OUR

surprisingl
a very low
women (less
’s

cent) nowadays
have lavish
otherwise
website
atrimonial recent survey families

percentag

women preferred
and simple
than 30 per
wish to
weddings
, 70 per

ceremony
?
display of

shadi.com revealed that untouched of the so-called

y
e of lavishness alia.
wealth. Even
have
by the

paraphern ay weddings

— become d
Present-d
planned
not

wedding
middle-cla
remained
uncalled-f

affairs

cent specialiseeverything from include

a small
manage
with finish.
projects
Their marriage ns – national
honeymoo
ss

wedding
or

have
and
planners
start to

n destinatio – venues of
al
higher premium than men, called ‘sex
extra’. It was thought that the lives of
to be one of the main reasons for
and also internation of marriage,

M. Sharma in the
as
highlighted.

“weaker sex” involved greater risk! It

well s
of close relatives . as ceremonie and
a handful the different
to court marriages season is menu —
vegetarian
Chinese,
consented the wedding its sumptuousarian with
Sharma with all
By K. M. As usual,
the corner of Indian non-veget
and other intercontin —
ental
round a Mexican of different flavours with
. The pattern
hullabaloo fact, has gone through dishes ent
in traditional wedding entertainm the dholak
weddings, from the with
huge transition and showy traditional nach-gana t, police and
to a noisy on instrumen
and simple greater emphasis the main
affair with vulgar as
s and a

either of them going astray and

allocation

article (June I), What is understood that a daughter of the

financial
(First) 2008
Era ● October
Woman’s

acquiring such dreaded deceases. goes into our Matrimonial top executive of the LIC , in its early
A strong realisation that they are Extravaganzas that marriage is a days, proposed her life for insurance
made for each other and that till personal affair that needs to be which was accepted with the sex
death they have to be loyal to each celebrated in a simple and dignified extra. She seems to have
other in tune with the vow they have manner. These days marriage has successfully argued and convinced
taken at their holy matrimony would become an expensive affair and her father to see that the sex extra
deter them from indulging in people spend more than their was removed for all women.
extramarital affairs. Let true love, capacity. Now life insurance premium for a
which is eternal, prevail over carnal It is really absurd that some people woman is at par with man (at least
feelings that are really short-lived. borrow money to spend on such with LIC if not with all other private
– Tharcius S. Fernando, Chennai. occasion. Simple marriage with a few insurers), but never at a lower rate.
guests can lead to a lot of saving. – M. Radhakrishnan, Thrissur.
Money thus saved can be used for the
EDITORIA
L
LOK SABHA
MEIRA KUMAR, A future needs of the married couple.
FITTING CHOICE
OF
SPEAKER as the
DS
FIRST WOMANelection of Meira Kumar is a
Lok Sabha tary
AT CROSSROA he unanimousSpeaker of the
N STILL
T
The prize is awarded to:
the Parliamen
HIGHER EDUCATIO begun in first woman event in the Indian

– Harinder Kaur, Jalanadhar.

process has of students e Minister and
admission memorabl Deputy Prime Ram, Meira
nce again, millions on and of former
s. Each year, Babu Jagjivan

O
Daughter post and
universitie ving examinatiobtaining history. Dalit leader, new ideals for the
school-lea
appear in colours
out with flying Over the years,
prominent
hopefully
set
the Indian
girls.
them pass marks. Kumar will model for of a theoretical
millions of per cent 90 per cent a good role is something whether
80 to 90 more than of present n Speaker ary politics,
more than

AS SPEAKER
securing a problem A non-partisa
students created d parliament In this regard,
number of This has In Delhi in party-base
hold in practice.after her election
growing. ed colleges. construct
may not
marks is in well-reput than 50 thousand it may or
soon to be
of seats more a press conference Kumar promised every

Tharcius S. Fernando, Chennai.

shortage Obviously,
, for example, in just two days.
sold in addressing soft-spoken Meira opportunit ies to also
University
forms were students seek admission A big to Speaker,
impartial”
and give
his or her say. She
admission s while
meritoriou the seats are limited. of “entirely of Parliament to have above party line
all these But the future rise national
colleges. hangs on Member parties to issues of
reputed
mark, therefore, education. asked politicalin discussion on
question the higher timely taken part . has to
aspiring for Kapil Sibal has very ent taking importance mostly the Speaker
students Minister Developm the House,
New HRD Human Resource
Although, conduct of e
charge of office, he ensure smooth special significanc
over the ly after assuming that skill acquires and
Ministry. Immediate and declared the office of defection
area.
his priorities the main thrust when issues crop up.
outlined
nt would
be the foreign ation turn the
to review disqualific could even

Your tribute to
developme in the last
he sought Such decision nt also. Ms Kumar
Secondly, was introduced to governme office her
Bill, which not be passed, due fate of a the dignified
university of the
but could Parties. This will bring
to
as a member She
Lok Sabha by the Left It
opposition in strength. years of experience and as a
minister.
of
vigorous has dwindled
entire Left the foreign
university Lok Sabha desired qualities
time, the certain that seems to
be to have the and a commitment
seems almost Kapil Sibal his seems
patience,

A SOCIETY IS
to fruition. do what amiability,
Bill will come for he wants to his first
not do in to fair play. of the nation’s
in a hurry, Arjun Singh could Arjun Singh the first
or bent of The election and now
predecess term. Leftist is a strong two years ago desire towards
entire five-year and Kapil Sibal sector. President a genuine

Meira Kumar on her

is woman Speaker indicate Women’s
is well known education d. There woman ent. In
this context,has been in
of liberalising is understoo s. Then, crucial, which

WOMAN'S ERA
proponent eagerness empowerm
universitie women
Kapil Sibal’s of seats in Indian n Bill becomes
get admission
could not and all that. Reservatiofor long. day with Ms
Kumar
L
EDITORIA
a dearth
certainly s students n cold store the light of say that India in
is and
all the meritoriou like reservatio to ease the it may see Director,
reasons s is likely
Let’s pray we can proudly and held by the CBI act as
due to various But who
will Only then, respected this, disclosure Ministry shouldnip this
foreign universitie in the Chair. women are truly In light of

JUDGED ON ITS
Entry of Indian students. indulged where by the Home tion to
in favour
of don’t get , a land lated issues released
also data principles for the administramay prove a
big
universities women-re as a
L PROBLEM
situation mechanism high esteem. , this problem at
these foreign regulatory time, other still being treated guiding may be put
ensure that ting only? Proper foreign At the same the the bud. Otherwise in future, when it is rampant.
before any They are violent crimes. AN ETERNA been said and written aboutEvery evil in the
in pick-pocke in place soil. be ignored. become target of for our countrywhere flesh tourism
feet on Indian

elevation as the first invites readers’

must be d. cannot t and mentallya in India. headache
therefore, to plant its beforehan and often self-relian ding in uch has
human trafficking and women countries
university

One more
is allowed also be checked

thing,
should
Their credibility for a large number
still means
convention
etc. No
of people,
al courses
higher
like BA,
courses
doubt, these USP is big way.
commodity

strong so
that
be educated,
They should they can participate
in nation-buil

has seen
many women
the country fields, but their numberent
is
M
disappear
problem of
year, thousands
of children
homes. Fortunate
from their by the police, which to their
are traced
among themepitome of passivity,
ones from
has now
and restored of these
par with such

APT RECOM Law Commission

MENDATIONS
the Centralmarriages of NRI not
boys
education their No doubt, al that most ecently,
So far, it
is
B.Com,
and B.Sc., their fields. But
in , why is
it so that
a in their profession
more excellingfar between. Therefore,
women empowerm
which will
be a become an the grim reality remains back. And no one
R ded making
recommen girls mandatory . registered
in

TREATMENT OF
experts
produce Otherwise and of the hour, families. But are never
traced with Indian to get such marriages
declining. a CA commands entire few is the need
constantly an MBA or fact, the scale m We missing persons about their fate. Ashwini required d a big
engineer, In g. at mass indication. mansera.co bother by the CBI
Director
aspect of
statutorily are considereto marry
doctor, an our society? seems to

opinions and
money, in overhaulin
to positive write to: letters@wo
rather shocking the country. society, daughters wish
respect, and
complete
be able Recent disclosure in New In Indian s. Parents ble
system requiresMinister will

Speaker of the Lok

another, two-day seminar household marriagea
Kumar highlights During a pilgrimage liability in
common she attains well
education
the new
HRD
tenure. problem. holy places of as soon as see their daughters
Hopefully, during his (Second) 2009 this eternal that the in the cases
off their daughter to
this mission Era ● June Delhi, he
disclosed s increase coastal parents want husbands. grooms has
complete Woman’s tremendou
states, southern age. All the settled with their NRI
are also witnessing Among all leading the demand of
trafficking. and Karnataka are Of late, the in the wedding
of human many folds a tag of ‘settled
Tamil Nadu and increased
states of trafficking
of human What is more, carrying
after. But
sadly,
tally in terms market. Boys

WOMEN
much sought make thorough
woman abuses. about 85 per abroad’ are fail to
child- and e boys in

reactions on
to the Director, to
are subjected the many parents prospectiv .
according victims n about the many constraints
the within investigatio to
cent of abuses abroad due are not
types of

Sabha is very apt – First Woman

of human India and the parents checks.
various words, evils abuse dably, all such
In other and woman Understan carry out
country.
and child- and strong to ditch their
trafficking firm roots in our society financially the grooms dreams
in this when ultimately all their
have taken indulging But they find
people are wives midway, s
our own themselve
our system girls find
heinous crime. is that neither shattered. foreign
But the irony to identify such
criminal The haplesslot of troubles in a
d by the Indian

articles, short stories

are
able
nor we are Even if some people for surrounde most cases, even
In help such
are acquitted country. unable to
elements.
most of them the data of Home abroad are no legal proof that
missions
nabbed, proof, as they have the most,
want of solid the year 2007, because person. At

Speaker of Lok Sabha (June II,

In girls so to be

The editorial, An
2007 shows. on and to India
be deserted married to so
Ministry for people were arrested 3220 could they are girls back
But only send such
total 9861 these missions in our
human trafficking. simply acquitted. places are
families. are treated
charges of with their such cases duped,
and rest were and pilgrimage If a reunitedno secret how about such to the
convicted even religious traffickers. It is babbling them
And now for the human nt along with People start girls often driving
safe havens

and features published

turning into
Governme soon society. and deserted
by the Centralthese places will ditched suicide. n Singh has
report prepared believed, if their activities point of committing nt under Dr
Manmoha
refined person.
is to be traffickers He is a
UNICEF dens for human New Governme reigns. qualified.
become big order to the country’s are also highlycome at an
in time. places in taken up cabinet members dations have
are not curbed to these that their up
people travelcompletely unaware Most of his nt must take

2009). This soft spoken former IFS

n’s recommen

Eternal Problem on
Innocent they are What else Law Commissio The new Governmesuch laws at once
But salvation. time.
find solace. themselve s need and used
condoms opportune priority basis and
frame
with Indian
girls
salvers are empty liquor bottles Tirupati temple this issue
on
of NRIs’ marriages be saved
of
e of trust
managing to check registration of girls could
recovery
Who is going that law making a number unscrupul ous men,

in Woman’s Era. The best

from the guesthous shows? seen . Only then, of just to
Pradesh at mandatory into the clutches brides in India
in Andhra It is generally out raids from falling purpose is to ditch
these activities? shun carrying m We
nt agencies could be riots. whose sole abroad.
enforceme there the society, vested interests to: letters@womansera.co
places lest the part of fulfil their write
religious apathy on seems to
But this general ing agencies places.
law-enforc
tion and at the religious

officer who has served the nation in human trafficking,

administra elements (First) 2009
anti-social Era ● June
embolden Woman’s

letter will be given a prize of

different diplomatic assignments is together with Apt Recommendations Rs 500. Address your letters by
endowed with many qualities which (June I, 2009) about making E-mail to: letters@womansera.com
have encouraged the UPA Govern- registration of marriages with NRI or by post to:
ment to select her to adorn the most mandatory, in reality points towards AS YOU SAY
coveted seat in the Lok Sabha. the ever-lowering standard of living of
Apart from being the daughter of our countrymen. Be it the human E-3 Jhandewala Estate, New Delhi-110055.
Babu Jagjivan Ram, a prominent trafficking or exploitation of women in Womansera.com
Dalit leader from Bihar and one of the NRI marriages, not merely the Name:
tallest leaders of the pre and post- notorious elements but we all in the Mobile:
Independence era, Meira has been society are responsible. E-mail:
an MP for decades and has also The allurement of settling abroad

146 Woman’s Era ● July (Second) 2009