Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Khan Sarfaraz Ali
Abstract
Family violence is a widespread problem; research has shown family violence can happen
to anyone. Persons with disabilities, women, men, youth, seniors, and same sex partners
may be coping with abuse and violence. Victims of family violence come from all socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds. Regardless of gender or relationship status, family
violence is characterized by a power imbalance, where one person tries to control another.
Now a day, Bangladesh is experiencing this problem severely like other countries. The study
has been undertaken to contribute to both our general knowledge on family violence and to
suggest a series of action for the well being of the victims. This piece of writing will work as
a basis for the policy makers and plan executors to adopt realistic plans to really do
something to cope with this problem. A unique feature of the article is its journalistic style.
All information in it are carefully organized. This will be very important resource for
anyone interested in family violence and its impact on psycho-social life. The purpose of
this article is to explore the scenario of family violence in Bangladesh.
Methodology
This study is the result of a series of interview and life experiences of persons who heard or
faced family violence in their lives. Though the study is based on primary data, secondary
information also has been used to enrich the structure. This is a qualitative type of study and
case study method was applied for this purpose. A questionnaire containing both structured
and unstructured questions was developed to collect data from the respondents. Direct
participation in the interview with the respondents and observation techniques were also
active during the study period. 58 respondents including 25 male and 33 female from the
study area were interviewed directly to gather information for this purpose.

Study Area
Available secondary data shows, there is a scarcity of research work on family violence in
Bangladesh. But it is quite true that family violence occurs everywhere in respect to social
class, income, status or anything else. As the most populous city of the country, Dhaka city
was selected as the study area and citizens of this city were selected as the respondents to
get necessary information. As Dhaka city represents other parts of the country, experience
from this city will help to get a clear picture about family violence and its impact on our
psycho-social life.
Associate Management Counselor, Bangladesh Institute of Management (BIM)
Cell: 00-88-01817528067, e-mail: sarfarazbim@gmail.com

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Introduction
Family violence is one of the social problems that affect people of any community, culture or
background. More or less every society has bitter experience of this problem. Family
violence can happen to anyone, yet the problem is often overlooked, excused, or denied. This
is especially true this type of violence is psychological, rather than physical. Noticing and
acknowledging the warning signs and symptoms of family violence and its impact is the first
step to ending it. No one should live in fear of the person they love. There is a common idea
in this society that women are the only victims of such violence. International statistics
suggest women are not the only victims of family violence and abuse; men also suffer from
this violence - especially verbal and emotional abuse and may be even more ashamed to seek
help.1 Family violence is used for one purpose and one purpose only: to gain and maintain
total control over any family member. An abuser does not play fair. Abusers use fear, guilt,
shame, and intimidation to wear the victim down and keep him/her under their thumb.
Abusers may also threaten, hurt the victim, or hurt those around the victim. Study shows, this
will be truly difficult to sort out a single family who did not experience family violence for a
single day. The forms of family violence vary from one culture to another, one society to
another society. In most cases, people like to conceal this problem considering it as a family
matter. In Bangladesh, still there is a lack of study in this field that discourages readers to
learn the reality. Consequently, a lot of victims suffer acutely from psycho-social agony. In
this respect, more study and concentration are required urgently to mitigate this problem
from the society.
Meaning of Family Violence
Family violence includes many different forms of abuse that adults or children may
experience in their intimate, kinship or dependent relationships. Family violence also
includes being mistreated or being neglected by these members. As we gain more
understanding about the kinds and amount of violence in close relationships and in dealings
with other family members, the definition of family violence will continue to change. There
are many ways to describe family violence. In a simple way : family violence is the
manifestation in any close interpersonal relationship 2 where the power dynamic between
family members becomes temporarily or permanently fixed in favor of one person over
another as an consequence of the periodic or continuous use of physical violence, threats and
intimidation, non-physical abuse or any controlling behavior, and which results in physical
hurt, fear of harm, inability to engage equally with the other, loss of control and/or the
inability to access resources and the inability to exercise autonomy by the other.
1
2

Breaking the Silence: a Handbook for Victims of Violence in Nebraska

For example - between spouses, partners, parents and children, siblings and in other relationships where
significant others are not part of the physical household but are parts of the family and/or are fulfilling the
function of family.

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

MensLine Australia believes the use of physical, emotional, sexual, psychological or

economic abuse in family and intimate relationships is always unacceptable and in some
cases is against the law.3 Family violence is an act by a member of a family or household
against another member of the family or household that is:
a) intended to result in physical harm, bodily injury or assault;
b) a threat that reasonably places the members in fear of imminent physical harm, bodily
injury or assault, but does not include defensive measures to protect oneself; or
c) intended to inflict emotional harm, including an act of emotional abuse.
When the relationship between a family member and his/her partner and/or other family
members can be described as a power over relationship, rather than a power with
relationship means abnormal behavior in that family that ultimately focuses on family
violence. In such a situation following behaviors usually take place:
a.
engaging in physical and/or sexual assault grabbing, pushing, slapping,
punching, rape
b.
making threats to harm yelling, screaming, punching walls, standing over,
preventing the other from leaving, making threats
c.
engaging in emotional and psychological abuse name calling, belittling
remarks, put downs, continuous criticisms, making fun of the other, threatening to harm
oneself
d.
putting limits on what the other can do going everywhere with them,
quizzing them on where they go and what they do, ringing up all the time, stalking,
isolate them from family and friends
e.
preventing other from making choices making most of the decisions, expect
the other to ask permission, control the money in the household,
Types of Family Violence
Many people believe that family violence is only physical abuse. However, family violence
takes many different forms. It may also be psychological, sexual, financial or spiritual.
Physical Abuse includes hitting, pinching, slapping, pushing, punching, kicking,
burning, stabbing or shooting. It may also include threats to cause harm. Psychological
Abuse (sometimes referred to as emotional or verbal abuse) includes put-downs, name
calling, jealousy, isolation from family and friends, and threats to leave the relationship
or to commit suicide if the victim does not co-operate. Sexual Abuse includes unwanted
touching or sexual activity. It may include control over birth control, forced pregnancies
or abortions and transmission of Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD). Financial
Abuse occurs when an individual uses finances to control another individual. This could

http://www.menslineaus.org.au/Family-Violence.html

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

include forcing a person to hand over all or part of their salary or by denying someone
access to their own finances.
Spiritual Abuse occurs when an individual uses religious or spiritual matters to
control another, such as forcing another to follow a particular faith or give up their religion.
Neglect includes failing to (intentionally or unintentionally) care for or meet the needs of
people who are dependent and cannot meet their own needs. Neglect includes failing to
provide adequate nutrition, clothing and other necessities; adequate personal care (e.g. failing
to turn a bedridden person frequently); safe and comfortable conditions; a clean environment;
sufficient space for personal privacy; and/or transportation to necessary appointments and
occasional outings. It may also include leaving incapacitated people alone too long; failing
to remain with those who need help; and/or abandonment.
Research has shown multiple factors are associated with family violence. Types of
family violence include spouse abuse; elder abuse and neglect; child abuse and neglect;
parent abuse; and sibling abuse. There are three types of spouse abuse: physical abuse, sexual
violence, and psychological/emotional abuse. These often occur in combination, and
although either partner may be the victim, most victims are women. Among the many factors
that may contribute to the occurrence of spouse abuse are learned behavior, trial-and-error
learning, and substance abuse. Abused and neglected elderly persons are among the most
isolated victims of family violence. They are maltreated by their spouses, adult children, or
other relatives. There are four types of elder abuse: physical, psychological/emotional,
material exploitation, and violation of rights. Causes of elder abuse range from seemingly
deliberate abuse of older persons by spouses and adult children, to unintentional cases of
neglect related to the frailty of the older person, to the pressures that can result from care
giving. There are four types of child maltreatment: physical abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and
mental injury. Although any of the types of child maltreatment may be found alone, one often
finds them occurring in combination. Parent and sibling abuse; the effects of family violence;
and federal, state, and local response to family violence are discussed.
Family violence occurs in many forms; the most prominent are domestic violence,
child abuse, and elder abuse. Family violence affects many persons at some point in their life
and constitutes the majority of violent acts in our society. Although there has been
considerable study of the patterns, risk factors, and interventions for each form of family
violence, great controversy still exists within each area. There is growing recognition of an
overlap in the patterns, causes, and effective interventions across types of family violence.
There is also an increasing awareness of the value of greater integration of theory and
research across areas into a family violence approach through an ecological perspective. This

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

review focuses on current knowledge related to these problems and suggests integrative steps
to advance knowledge.
Domestic abuse, also known as spousal abuse, occurs when one person in an intimate
relationship or marriage tries to dominate and control the other person. Domestic abuse that
includes physical violence is called domestic violence. Domestic violence and abuse do not
discriminate. It happens among heterosexual couples and in same-sex partnerships. It occurs
within all age ranges, ethnic backgrounds, and financial levels. And while women are more
commonly victimized, men are also abusedespecially verbally and emotionally. This type
of violence may occur by spouse, common-law spouse, parent, sibling, child, grandparent,
grandchild, in-law, step-parent, step-child, step-sibling or other family member. By the
passage of time family violence got different kind of exposure like: physical abuse, sexual
abuse and exploitation (being used for a sexual purpose), neglect, psychological and mental
abuse and financial abuse.
The aim of emotional or psychological abuse is to chip away at your feelings of selfworth and independence. If youre the victim of emotional abuse, you may feel that there is
no way out of the relationship, or that without your abusive partner you have nothing.
Emotional abuse includes verbal abuse such as yelling, name-calling, blaming, and shaming.
isolation, intimidation, and controlling behavior also fall under emotional abuse.
Additionally, abusers who use emotional or psychological abuse often throw in threats of
physical violence.
Sexual abuse is common in abusive relationships. According to the National
Coalition against Domestic Violence, between one-third and one-half of all battered women
are raped by their relatives at least once during their relationship. Any situation in which
victims are forced to participate in unwanted, unsafe, or degrading sexual activity is sexual
abuse. Forced sex, even by a spouse or intimate partner with whom the victim also have
consensual sex, is an act of aggression and violence. Furthermore, women whose partners
abuse them physically and sexually are at a higher risk of being seriously injured or killed.
In case of Economic or financial abuse, an abusers goal is to control the victim, and
s/he will frequently use money to do so. Economic or financial abuse includes: Rigidly
controlling finances, withholding money or credit cards, making account for every penny
spent, withholding basic necessities (food, clothes, medications, shelter), restricting to an
allowance, preventing from working or choosing own career, sabotaging job (making miss
work, calling constantly), and stealing from or taking money.
Consequences of Family Violence

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Family violence can have serious and sometimes fatal consequences for victims and for those
that see or hear the violence. Although the Criminal Code does not refer to specific family
violence offences, many Criminal Code offences could be used to charge someone with acts
of family violence. These offences could be assault, sexual assault, criminal harassment
(often called stalking), making threats against someone and murder. The Criminal Code
also provides measures to prevent family violence, such as protection orders and certain
procedures for protecting victims of family violence. There are consequences for those on the
receiving end of the actions, such as being physically or psychologically hurt, feeling unsafe,
unable to express themselves freely and openly, being withdrawn and guarded, feeling and
acting unsure, deferring to and/or allowing to make all the decisions, being depressed and
anxious, loss of affection and intimacy in the relationship.4
The Cycle of Family Violence
Family violence falls into a common pattern, or cycle of violence:

Abuse The abusive partner lashes out with aggressive, belittling, or violent
behavior. The abuse is a power play designed to show who is boss.
Guilt After abusing, the abuser feels guilt, but not over what s/hes done. S/he is
more worried about the possibility of being caught and facing consequences for his/her
abusive behavior.
Normal behavior The abuser does everything s/he can to regain control and keep in
the relationship. S/he may act as if nothing has happened, or s/he may turn on the charm.
This peaceful honeymoon phase may give hope that the abusive partner has really changed
this time.
Fantasy and planning Abuser begins to fantasize about abusing you again. S/he
spends a lot of time thinking about what have done wrong and how s/he will make pay. Then
s/he makes a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality.
4

http://www.menslineaus.org.au/Family-Violence.html

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Set-up The abuser sets up and puts his/her plan in motion, creating a situation where
s/he can justify abusing you.5
Family Violence in Bangladesh
It is evident, in Bangladesh; family violence means violence against women. It is
unfortunate that despite remarkable achievements in the field of womens development and
bearing a glorious history of womens movement, incidences of violence against women is
rather high in Bangladesh. It is not easy to say whether violence against women has
decreased or increased over the past few years because of lack of reliable base-line survey,
but in absolute term, the number of incidences is alarmingly high. To quote from the record
on the basis of newspaper reporting, there have been about 1500 incidents of violence
against women in Bangladesh in the year 2006 which included acid burns, dowry related
violence, rape and attempted rape, violence instigated by fatwa and violence against female
domestic workers. According to the information provided by Mahila Parishad, a leading
womens organization of Bangladesh, only for the months of January and February 2007,
the numbers stand at 332 and 462 respectively. Another source reveals, of the 1,254 cases of
violence against women reported by various Newspapers in 2006, about 50 per cent of
victims were under 30 years of age. 741 women were victims of rape, 334 subjected to
violence due to dowry whereas number of fatwas issued by imams (religious leaders) stood
at 39. Some improvement was seen in the case of acid burns, which decreased from 270 in
2005 to 221 in 2006. However, in the period between January and March 2007, ASK
documented already 4 fatwa related cases of violence, 126 incidents of rape including 10
deaths and 2 suicides, 67 dowry related violence with 34 deaths and 4 suicides. Cases of
acid burns were 28.
The above statistics are particularly disturbing for Bangladesh as Bangladesh is a
country known for the resilience of her people against repression, discrimination,
undemocratic and autocratic military rules in which women have always played a significant
role. In fact Bangladesh is one of those countries where women at different very critical
junctures of time took the responsibility of leading the country forward. This is true of the
time during the nine-month long liberation war when it is the women basically who were left
back in the territory to look after the country while most of the male family members were
either killed by the Pakistani occupation army or they had to leave the country to save
themselves and join the liberation force. Even before that, over the decades of fifties and
sixties, women gave leadership to the literary and cultural movements culminating in the
mass upheaval of 1969 and the liberation war itself. In the post liberation war period too, we
see women leaders engaged in the reconstruction of the country both in the private as well as
public sectors, moving for the trial of the war criminals, participating in the political, social
5

Mid-Valley Women's Crisis Service

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

and cultural rebuilding of the society. But the contributions of women have not been given
due recognition in history before, during or after the war of liberation.
The Constitution of Bangladesh, however, pledges and also guarantees equality
before law for everyone including women, equality for women in the public life, special
measures to bring women at par with their male counterparts and repealing of discriminatory
laws. But application of personal laws to govern people according to the dictates of the
religion one is born into, defeats the principle of equality before law so pledged. This brings
us to the discussion of the UN Convention for the elimination of all kinds of discrimination
against women (CEDAW). The UN CEDAW (1979) binds all the UN member states signing
and ratifying the document to review its laws to examine whether they are good enough to
give women the desired equality- equality not only in terms of opportunity but also equality
in result. Bangladesh was one of the first countries to sign and ratify it but reserving clause 2,
and clauses relating to rights within the family. The 1996 government withdrew reservation
on two of the clauses still retaining the same on clause 2 and 16.1(c). These two clauses are
the most important ones as far as womens equality is concerned. And equality in every
sphere of life - be it private or public, is a pre-condition to minimize violence against women.
It is therefore important to work towards full ratification and materialization of CEDAWs
principles.6
Family violence is manifested in physical torture, (murder for dowry or other reasons,
assault, battering, female feticide, murder of girl-child, food deprivation, absence of health
services, malnutrition, and control over reproductive rights) sexual violence by rape and
other sexual transgressions and mental torture by obstructing womens mobility, forced
marriage, threats of eviction from the family etc. Society does it normally by humiliation and
sanctioning family violence in the name of social norms. Trafficking, forced prostitution,
gang rape, sexual harassment, pornography, commoditization of womens body etc could be
cited as social violence whereas condoning social and family violence is a form of state
violence in addition to not offering protection in case of communal violence or violence at
times of war and conflict, denying equal rights by application of discriminatory laws or
imposing unequal status by statute to uphold patriarchal values. Family and the society are
the places where indoctrination and socialization of patriarchal values nurturing the
principles of male hegemony over women, which motivates both women and men to accept it
as naturally takes place. The socialization process ensures mens control and disciplining
6

Violence against women in Bangladesh: Issues and responses.

Habiba Zaman. Department of Womens Studies, Simon Fraser University, Burnaby, British Columbia, V5A
1S6, Canada.

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

power over womens body, mobility and labor. Not only that, womens bodily integrity, her
right to control her body including her sexuality and reproduction too are violated through
such controlling authority given to men. State validates this by either making laws in favor or
refusing to provide remedies against. The most unfortunate part is that the violence at the
very personal/private level within the limits of the family is not even recognized as violence
by the state in Bangladesh. Even though Bangladesh has a much discussed law under the title
of Suppression of Violence against Women Act (1995 amended in 1997 and 2000) has been
enacted after intensive and extensive consultation with the womens groups, the main focus
of the act was on enhancement of punishment rather than substantial and procedural
competence. The womens ministry has only a meager percentage of 1-4 allocated to combat
violence against women. Absence of adequately qualified persons with strong motivation is
still a problem within the government institutions. Conviction rate is significantly low
compared to the complaints lodged and cases filed. This shows the mindset of the officials
responsible. The womens policy formulated in 1997 on the basis of recommendations of
CEDAW, Beijing Platform for Action and SNAT of 1996 was changed clandestinely in the
year 2004 to replace equality clauses by vague words signifying no definite rights for women
in the area of property ownership and resource-sharing. Policies for appointment in
responsible positions were also removed.7
The Non-Governmental as well as activist organizations, of course, have shown
considerable commitment to combat violence against women through individual or collective
networks. In the last few years violence against women has been practically the main focus
of these organizations. The alliances of ANCVAW, We Can Stop Violence against Women,
Gender and Development Alliance are the most active now in Bangladesh on the issue of
violence against women. To mention CEDAW in relation to violence against women it is
important to recognize the value of full ratification of the convention. Otherwise without
accepting the basic clause of equality (2) and equal rights within the family (16.1c), one
cannot expect to see any effective result in this area. CEDAW anyhow does not deal with the
issue of violence against women but the very premise that equality in every sphere of life
would ensure violence free life for women is the basic in the concept of the instrument.
Moreover, recommendations by CEDAW regarding the reform in police stations to offer
special assistance to women have proved to be really helpful. Application of CEDAW
principles in court has also given women the desired result in some cases. In conclusion, it
may not be out of context to discuss the Diaspora mentality towards violence against women,
which is typically characterized by the tendency to hide incidences of violence lest family or
national honor is hurt. It is very important to remember honor lies in honestly recognizing the
wrong to make it right.

Roushan Jahan. Hidden danger: women and family violence in Bangladesh. POPLINE Document.

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

Findings of the Study

The study reveals, all of the respondents (100 percent) heard about or faced family violence
in their lives, 34.48% of them reported as direct victim of family violence in their own lives
and the rest 65.51% heard it from their relatives, neighbors or friends. Major portion of the
respondents (41.38%) work in private or non-government organizations, 34.48% of them are
involved in housework activities, 13.48% are students at different level and 10.34% are
government service holder. Among the married (75.86%) respondents 54.54% got settled
marriage, 40.90% got love marriage and 4.54% eloped for marriage. Following table shows
a brief picture of the respondents who experienced family violence either from own lives or
others:
Table - 1: Indicators expressing the basic information of the respondents
Indicators
Age limit

Total
Sex
Total
Marital status
Total
Educational background

Total
Family structure
Total
Members in family

Total
Idea about family violence
Total
Experienced family violence from

Total
Think family is safe from violence
Total

Response
20-30
30-40
40-50
50-60
Male
Female
Married
Unmarried
Up to HSC
Graduate
Masters
PGD/M. Phil
Joint family
Nuclear family
Extended family
1-3
4-6
7-9
9 above
Aware
Helpless
Self
Relative
Neighbor
Friend
Colleague
Yes
No
-

No. of Respondents
36
16
04
02
58
25
33
58
44
14
58
08
10
34
06
58
26
28
04
58
20
28
06
04
58
28
30
58
20
12
10
09
07
58
22
36
58

(%)
62.07
27.59
6.90
3.44
100
43.10
56.90
100
75.86
24.14
100
13.79
17.24
58.62
10.34
100
44.83
48.28
6.90
100
68.75
15.62
3.12
12.5
100
48.28
51.72
100
34.48
20.68
17.24
15.51
12.06
100
37.93
62.07
100

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

This is evident from the research that the family violence is a serious problem in
Bangladesh. Majority of the respondents addressed they feel helpless (51.72%) in case of
family violence, other 48.28% are aware of family violence. Most of the respondents are
Masters degree holder (58.62%), 17.24% are graduate, 13.79% have completed HSC level
and the rest 10.34% are either Post Graduate Diploma holder or M. Phil awarded. A truth
comes from this information that family violence is not limited in illiterate or uneducated
families; rather it is spreaded throughout the educated families also. Following table
illustrates common forms of family violence in this society:
Table - 2: Types of Violence in Bangladeshi Families
Type of Violence
Physical assault
Psycho-emotional abuse
Sexual abuse
Verbal abuse
Total

No. of Respondents
15
25
08
10
58

Percentage (%)
25.86
43.10
13.79
17.24
100

Major portion of the respondents expressed their views for psycho-emotional abuse
(43.10%), 25.86% for physical assault, 17.24% for verbal abuse and 13.79% for sexual
abuse in families. A good number of the respondents (68.96%) think mistrust, suspicion and
differing opinions are the root causes of family violence. Other 31.03% blamed
dissatisfaction, want and over expectation for family violence. 82.76% of the respondents
agreed, dowry system still play a role in family violence. 79.31% mentioned sexual
dissatisfaction or maladjustment as another important cause of family violence. Most of
them (96.55%) stated economic insolvency or loss of job as basis of family violence. One
thing is surprising, 60% of the victims of family violence try to mitigate the situation
through mutual understanding, only 10% often report to law enforcing authority and rest
30% keep it concealed.
Conclusion and Recommendations
In the light of the study, it is wise to show a gateway that may break the silence to bring out
the fact and may assist in reducing family violence in the country. Many experts suggest that
the amount of family violence in Bangladesh may be much higher than it is anticipated. This
is because surveys, studies and police reports do not capture all cases of violence and abuse.
For example, research has shown that many abuse victims do not or cannot report their
abuse to the police. Most victims who do report spousal violence to the police had suffered
more than one violent incident before reporting the latest abuse. In this respect, series of
steps may be suggested - call the police and lay a charge; report to the legal aid
organizations as soon as possible; at least tell a friend; seek help; get into a shelter or into
counseling.

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation

It is heartfelt demand of the respondents that Government as well as the concerned

organizations may initiate pragmatic programs that will really work for it. In order to
decrease the violence rate, family education, religious practice and peace education may be
encouraged. As an honor to our constitution, female should get all necessary support and
services as and when required. Awareness development campaign may play a vital role in
this regard. With a view to educate young generation with the concept family relationship
a series of workshop, seminar, training programs and conferences may be designed. Above
all, a commitment for eliminating family violence is earnestly required from each corner.
Here, the researchers, trainers, media executives, journalists and other professionals who are
willing to work in this field can work as change agents for the welfare of the society.
-----References
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4. Kathleen Malley-Morrison (2004). Issues in Childrens and Families Lives. Volume 11.
Family Violence in a Cultural Perspective. Defining, Understanding, and Combating
Abuse. Boston University - School of Medicine. Denise Hines. University of New
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9780805842456. Lawrence Erlbau.
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13. http://www.menslineaus.org.au/Family-Violence.html

Family Violence in Bangladesh: A Meticulous Observation