First draft.

1
There was nothing on Mars.

2
Then the spaceship came down.

3
Then the spaceship opened.

4
The Rover came out.

5
Then the Rover got around the rocks.
Then it looked inside a rock.

6
Then they go up the mountains.
The alien pops out.
The other alien pops up.

7
Then the spaceship goes back to Earth.

8
It lands on Earth.
First draft
Second draft.
Third draft
Fourth draft
1
There was nothing on Mars.

2
Then the spaceship came down.

The spaceship came from Earth with fire coming from the bottom of the spaceship.
It sounded like an earthquake.
It came from the space centre.

3
Then the spaceship opened.

The doors open slowly.

The ramp comes down onto Mars.

4
The Rover came out.

From the spaceship the Rover comes out like a slow worm.

5
Then the Rover got around the rocks.
Then it looked inside a rock.

The wheels slowly move down and the Rover starts looking for rocks.
The Rover takes pictures so the people on Earth can see how Mars looks.
what Mars looks like.

6
Then they go up the mountains.

It moves its wheels towards the mountain.

The Rover checks the mountain.
The Rover goes over the mountain like a snail.

Then an alien pops out and another alien pops up.

The aliens stare at the Rover. They screamed because they are scared.
The people at the space centre were surprised and amazed because there were
aliens.
“Oh my golly gosh! Come back to Earth!” The people at the space centre exclaimed.
7
Then the spaceship goes back to Earth.
Then the spaceship zooms back to Earth and the Rover stays because it doesn’t have
fire in it.

8
It lands on Earth.
“Phew… The space ship has come back.” sighed the people at the space centre.