Aleister Crowley - 1907 Diary Fragments

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-msna vigati on--> 190 7 Cro wle y dia ry fra gm ent Cop yrig ht (c) O.T .O. [M arc h, 19 07 E. V.] Bega Th n urs V.I.T day .R.I. 7 O.L. Beat Sunn y Jim by 7 &5 at h a strok e. Wrot e to D.D. S. askin g for permi ssion to do a Vow of Silen ce and to appoi nt a perio d. Fr id ay 8 Scu lpin g. Dal eth or rath er Ch ese d. 9.0 Sat Su Playi Mo P.M. urd nd ng nd Bega ay ay golf ay n 9 10 at 11 vow Maid of enhe Refu ad. sing Very to tryin answ g er this quest Vow ions. of R. D.D. to S. A.Q. says 24 7 slips days. in A the slip Pract is to ice be till puni now. shed with a razor -cut. Rose is very angr y, of cour se. One notic es in Refu sing to Ans wer Ques tions that nearl y ever ythin Took at 10.24 P.M. a minut e quant ity of Hashi sh --too small to have any possi ble effect , one woul d say, judgi ng by previ ous exper ience. 11.30 ended in D.F. D.'s luring me away also I nearl y slept. Rose & had tea & now write this. I think the hashi sh has 7 slips in Tu the esd Practice. ay At 10 P.M. 12 about, the minimum dose of F.E. Anhaloniu m Lewinii being 2 drops, took 1 drop only. TAROT drew 3 of Cups (curiously enough the card re Tankervill e said by D.D.S. to be Black Magic) ``Abundan ce''. Before taking drug, I note my physical condition excellent, my mental depressed from not being able to write what I want to, my magical exalted and on the verge of Samadhi. See opposite. 10.15 As Ga Th ve urs Su day nn 14 y Jim 13 & wo n by 2 & als o the By e. Ref use d to wri te or wir e. Ro ug h on Rat s! 5 slip s in the Pra ctic e. <!-msna vigati on-><!-msna vigati on-->
g said to one is a quest ion. One notic es that 5 years ago one woul d have calle d all the Gods to witn ess a maje stic cere moni al Vow ; at prese nt one deter mine s, & begi ns forth with. One may use this form ula to battl e agai nst and over com
had little or no effect perha ps just less than the desire d wakin g of Praty ahara. But no halluc inatio ns; no loss of timesense. Possi bly slight selfconsc iousn ess; but one woul dn't like to assert it. 12 Slips durin g Mond ay.
stated opposite took 1 drop A[nhaloniu m] L[ewinii] in a good deal of warm water. The taste is not unpleasant; it is very strongly reminiscen t of the tea of Yunnan, as there prepared and drunk. I proceed to 10.35 Am busying myself with colourthoughts of divine nature; and the A.L. having produced no perceptible result whatever took 1 drop more. 10.55 Still no apparent result. Took 2 drops. Possibly the Violet centres are stimulated. I see the flame of a match with green blue & violet at its edge.
e the Grea t Devi l One shou ld consi der befor e spea king at all whet her the spee ch is both nece ssary and unim porta nt; for unles s these cond ition s are fulfil led one brea ks the Vow of Silen ce, of whic h this is a bran ch. One has been
Probably this is mere Pratyahara resulting from intention to attain. Closing the eyes produces no result. 11.7 Striking the magic Bell, closed eyes, I saw an opalescent light, not well marked. Further I had seen some fine opal matrix in Bond St a few hours earlier. 11.27 Have made and drunk much tea. No symptom whatever from the A.L. 11.30 Took 3 drops more. 11.50 No symptom. Took 3 drops more. 10 drops in all. This being max dose, mentioned on label, will take
in fight ing form all day, but this form ula gives one an idea of trem endo us contr olled force . day. All thing s are won derfu l to me. I kno w that I am on the very thres hold of Bina h; that henc efort hI shall go abou t my ways in utter delig
no more. See page 208. March 12 cont. 13th Midnight.1 5. Conc--n not interfered with by drug. Maybe one gets occasional brilliant pictures with eyes shut; but it is not enough to record. I could get as good with plain expectatio n. Am apparently very sleepy. Pupils certainly not dilated. Eyes bloodshot, which is no surprise, after staring hard at the electric globe for over 10 minutes. [March, 1907] 12.30 A.M. Went astral tour no colour effects to speak of. 9.30 A.M. Nothing whatever unusual.
ht and prais e. Hail! This matt er of R[ef usin g] to A[ns wer] Q[ue stion s] resol ves itself into a vigil ance over spee ch. It is thus a muc h hard er task than plain Silen ce; for inter est in the conv ersat ion betra yeth this vigil ance. It has struc k me that
Wednesda y 13 An excellent day. Buckmaste rs charming. Sculping. Taw or GimelBeth-VauResh-He for R[ose] made a scene. 10 breaks in practice. I ______d Rose and slept like a dog______ _________ ____
``the Blac k Magi cian absta ins from salt'' is Tohu Boh u. The absta iner from salt did so to work evil with out beco ming nima kkhar am. Henc e he was susp ected of sorce ry. 7 slips Frida in the y 15 Practic e. PehAlephReshTaw Theor y perfect . Practic e He{H ebrew
} with Yod to Yod sanctu m. Yod with Yod and Pe to the Blesse d Fount of the Super nal Via Lactea , so that at 9.15 P.M. I took 4 drops F.E. Anhal onium Lewin ii in cold water. Am rather tired with my day's shoppi ng, but peacef ul & well. 9.40 Took 5 drops. 10.0 _____ _____. 10.27 _____ _____. 11.3 Acco mmod ation
of age still perfect . Took 7 drops. No result; but felt as if near somet hing. Also slight stoma chic disco mfort. Saturd ay 16 Cambr idge won the Boat Race. A grand fight of the Empir e. 7 slips in the Practic e (72 in all). End thereo f at 9.0 P.M. A letter from D.D.S. Moreo ver I did demon strate my superi
ority to the warrin g faction s of Netzac h& Hod by formul ating Yesod in the numbe r YodVauDalet.

Aleister Crowley - 1907 Diary Fragments

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