Anomaly

By Marin Toscano I am an anomaly of this modern-day humanity Not because I am extra-ordinary or especially bougie But because I embrace the full physicality of this reality Can't be defined by the sticky-icky bubble-box Designed to keep me confined Instead I desperately seek - I obsessively seek The divine inspiration from the diverse COMMUNITY around me And when I say the C-word I'm not talking about Chinese Communist History NO: COMMUNITY is contribution to unity And yet we neglect what built our ancestors ingenuity Excess Individualism creates a schism Societal fission - Resulting in deficient future vision One can make a difference But subtract 6 billion 9 hundred and 99 million From Total Potential - And tell me what's the difference? The equation wont be complete until each one of us abandons indifference When are our ambassadors where we need them? Overseas pacifying said heathens When our neighbors right here, right now Are barely breathin I am an anomaly of this modern-day humanity Not because I want to be Or because I was born with a plethora of dignity But because I know its NOT all up to me And yet I still gracefully manage personal responsibility See COMMUNITY is not about running away from duty Passin the buck, and Hoardin the credit So let's take the lowest common denominator and edit Take on your power to make a difference and go get it! I refuse to believe we were born greedy Granted sometimes the first words we speak are me, me, ME! But witness the love and attention that a mere self-centered baby can bring See the self can not exist without the other Just like the Earth will not persist without The Mother So let's be that for one another

 I am an anomaly of this modern-day humanity But its a pity cuz I dont have to be So many of us lost in false paradox That confidence and cockiness are synonymous Selfishness can only be skin deep But underneath theres just self-deprecation and reasons to weep As if we grew from the outside in Like flowers without a stem We are lost And the longer we deny this The higher the cost Were living stunted and playing a role Well never be whole Until we accept imperfection And embrace that life is one endless lesson CONFIDENCE cannot be owned or stolen Cannot be bought or gifted It comes from truth resurrected Immortal beyond our living flesh We inhale experience and exhale stress To stay suspended in the present Whether its absolute hell or brilliant bliss We can meet the moment and make it the best So when I say the other C-word Im not talking about self-centric America Or defense mechanisms for diversity-deprived bratty rich kids We have it all backwards All talk no action No Im talking about CONFIDENCE CONFIDENCE Rooted in action and future satisfaction And CONFIDENCE cannot be deemed singular Contained and refrained as if single-cellular We have to love ourselves first Before we can be vessels that quench the worlds thirst But even during this mending we must call others for helping-hearts Swallow our pride and digest the hard parts CONFIDENCE is self-trust that one will interact well Pick up and reconstruct the pieces that fell I am an anomaly of this modern-day humanity Mostly because I have FAITH in all the things I cant see Forces greater that can work for or against me But its better to admit they exist

Than ignore them as some mysterious pestilence FAITH that friend and foe can change as we go But we have to exercise our senses that dont depend strictly on what we know We must flow Like water - never stop just cuz you think you know And when I say the F-word Im not talking about mono-religious factions That deny world-wide spiritual currents Currents that cause give and take love and hate bittersweet diverse reactions And Im certainly not talking about faith as an excuse for inaction We cant let faith be our distraction NO FAITH is knowing that flying always comes before falling And that cyclical spirals evolve so we have to keep crawling We act tough and cool like we dont care But actual apathy is rare Its actually the other F-word that takes the stage And its not fair Building walls between us and the stars We FEAR everything that that could leave us with beautiful battle scars FEAR is pervasive Once its embodied it dont stop at the basics We FEAR everything including: Love Fighting Silence Trying Peace and Violence Most of all - We FEAR our potential So we take a pill So that we can stay under a spell Promise our safe self-constructed realities that its too late Because we already fell Sweet relief that weve reached rock-bottom No longer my problem Someone else will have to pick up the pieces of this reality thats quickly rottin Every persons neglect leads to one comprehensive defect We fear that if we really commit to create what we really want and really need We will always come short and damage the seed Better to be barely breathing Let life live us As we go through the motions nearly lifeless So afraid of the unknown Wed rather stay under our rock Un-inspired and alone Fear-fed drone I am an anomaly of this modern-day humanity Not because I am even close to perfect Trust me! I make mistake after mistake

But it just reminds me whats at stake I have to stand in the FEAR my own human perfection Have FAITH that its all teaching me lessons Be CONFIDENT that I will learn cuz Im attentive And call on my COMMUNITY to help me soak up all the bittersweet blessins To keep growing I must struggle daily Let go of the act that Im all knowing Not get caught in dichotomous thinking Spot one flaw And jump ship like the whole things sinking Good bad, Black white, Happy - sad These binaries are as real as fairies We have to LOVE all of it And everything in between Even if it seems complex We must keep the dream simple and undressed And when I say the L-word Im not talking about lovers lost in luscious fabric Neglecting their dreams for their other half until they both become static Two halves of a whole Tell me, what happened to each original soul? No, LOVE is patience and balance Even in the face of mystery and malice LOVE is making flowers bloom Even when you know theyll just die soon LOVE is looking your partner, or your best friend, or you parent, or your daughter, or the polluted water In the eye After they disappointed you and fell down so far from the pedestal in your mind that was once so high And saying with words as accurate and sure as darts: I LOVE you This story was written by a hand that meant to let it remain unfinished Each minute, each day, each lifetime, A new beginning The world keeps on spinning Challenged constantly to create and consecrate We must hold space for possibility ruthlessly And stand for one another gracefully If you give up on your word Which is your heart and your sword Despite your strife - just say it again and watch it breathe life Received willingly by the ears of our sisters and brothers Your integrity lives in the listening of others We must frequently enact our ability to replenish So that our vitality does not diminish Not even during the entire course of a souls lifetime

Which lasts more millennia Than there are lines in this rhyme