a Book of Prayers for Women

Jennifer J. Camp
Copyright 2013 by Jennifer J. Camp
ISBN-10:0989984818
ISBN-13:978-0-9899848-1-2
All rights reserved. This book or any por-
tion thereof may not be reproduced or used
in any manner whatsoever without the ex-
press written permission of the author ex-
cept for the use of brief quotations in a
book review.
Gather Ministries
280 Second Street, Suite 280 Los Altos,
CA 94022
www.gatherministries.com
Begin
A BOOK OF PRAYERS FOR WOMEN
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, ,
I LAY MYSELF DOWN
Dear Father,
Are you there? I am here, your girl, just praying you hear me. I know you are with me. I know you
see me. But I forget sometimes, too. And then I miss you. Oh, how I miss you, Father.
I read your words and see where you were in the pages of my Bible, your Son walking across this
very land, his feet dirty and his head weary from travel. And oh, while he was certainly tired from
walking this weary life, He never tired of looking for you.
Oh, Father, help me to look for you.
The pages in my Biblethe words and storiesfeel so flat sometimes. I feel so removed from
them, and they feel lifeless, even though I know they are your words. Oh, Father, I dont know how
to enter in. I dont know how to see you, hear you, feel you.
Father, teach me how to pray. I feel so alone.
Are you there?
Oh, God, do you see me? Do you delight in me? Do you hear the cries of my heart?
I confess I try to do things on my own a lot. I confess I push for my own way and look to myself for
strength more often than I look to You. I confess my pride, my stubbornness, my desire to do
things my way.
I lay myself down.
Oh, Father, I lay myself down.
You are sovereign. I lay myself down.
You are holy. I lay myself down.
You are steadfast. I lay myself down.
You are mighty. I lay myself down.
You are beauty. I lay myself down.
You are hope. I lay myself down.
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You are majesty. I lay myself down.
You are beginning. I lay myself down.
You are strength. I lay myself down.
You are Creator. I lay myself down.
Oh, God, come and rescue me, this heart that aches to see you, to hear you, to feel you, to follow
you. I am yours.
I am yours.
Let nothing stand between us. Let my heart be soft and open and willing and trusting.
Let my weakness this day be a testimony to your glory, your presence in me.
You are here.
You are here.
I see you.
This day, I lay myself down.
In Jesus name,
Amen
4

YOU ARE ENOUGH
Dear Father,
I can trick myself sometimes that I just dont need you. I stumble, and I try to rise again, on my
own. I am impatient with a friend, and I look at her faults instead of my hard heart. I am frustrated
with my family, and I yell, rather than bend low and try to listen, desiring to hear their thoughts
more than the pushing of my own agenda. I am selfish with my loved ones, comparing my to-do
lists with theirs. I want things my own way a lot. Too much. I confess you know better than I do
how to live, how to love.
Father, please, teach me how to love.
I want a selfless heart that pours itself out for your children and sees you.
I want a courageous spirit that says yes to what you have and does not turn away from pain.
I want a stretched wide, open faiththe belief that lives out the truth: You work out all things for
my good, in accordance with your good plan.
I want a mind that is curiousand eyes that see the way you see, ears that hear the way you hear,
hands that touch the way you touch.
I want a spirit of fearlessness, a willingness to be transparent and raw and vulnerable and over-
whelmingly beautiful in how you love me.
Oh, God, I want to live like I am yours. I want to live with a heart that loves, with a fullness not its
own. I want to live in your glory and be the girl, the woman, youve created. I want to see myself
the way you see me. I want to see you.
Oh, God, I need you, so desperately. And I rejoice in that desperation. I rejoice in my neediness of
you. I rejoice in my frailty, my not having the answers, my mistakes and failures and heart that
reaches for you.
Oh, God, I want to live in your light. I want to radiate the warmth of your love in me and let every-
one I meet see you in me.
Oh, Father, you are enough.You are enough for me.
In Jesus name,
Amen
6
,
WHEN I AM WEARY
Dear Father,
I am worn out, tired, not sure which way to turn. The list of demands is long. All the things I am
supposed to do. I am not sure I can do it all well. I am not even sure I want to do these things, any-
way.
I am busy, running from one obligation to the next. I wake with my list on my mindmy worries
about the people I love, my anxiety about health, work, finances, relationships . . .Oh, Father, I
need You.
I am tired of feeling like I need to carry the burdencaring for people and doing the jobs youve
given me to do. I confess I pick up these burdens too often, too much. I am weary from carrying
the loadthe load I was never meant to carry. I am sorry.
Father, I give all this back to you.
I surrender my family. It is yours.
I surrender my work. It is yours.
I surrender my fears. They are yours.
I surrender my list of obligations. It is yours.
I surrender my fears about health, about finances, about friendships, about the future.
They are yours.
You carry the load, Jesus, and I follow.
You extend your hand, and I grasp yours with all I am.
You whisper to my heart your truth, and I listen to your voice.
You quiet my mind and heart and soul, and I am still.
You breathe your love into me, your presence within me, and I am unafraid.
You are the one I need.
You are the leader, the strong one, the one in whom I lay all my trust.
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I see you.
You have my burdens and my load is light.
I can do anything, for I surrender, and you lead my way.
You are my King, my Creator, the one in whom I put all my trust.
You are the one I follow, the one who keeps me steadfast, who guards my path, who shows me the
road while you carry the map.
Yes, you have the map. I trust you to carry it while I follow, hands open, heart trusting.
You are the one I want, the only one I need.
In Jesus name,
Amen
9

WHEN I WISH FOR MORE
Dear Father,
I feel so alone sometimes. I am not sure I hear you. I am not sure you are close. I am not sure you
see me. I feel invisible, unnoticed, unloved. I can oftentimes just feel so lost.
Oh, Father, will you come? Will you come and rescue me again?
This heart of mine can feel so dark. I envy. I crave what others have and believe they are more
blessed. But that is not you, is it? You bestow good gifts to me, but I confess I often do not see
them. I overlook what you give and want more. I compare what I have to what others have and I
always fall short. I am not content. My heart is restless and searching, and I am tired of always
wanting more.
Oh, God, why do I think I need more than what you give?
Let me see what you give. Let me awake to your beauty, Your treasures of life all around me. You
do not withhold your love and good gifts from me. You do not hesitate in showing your love to me.
You run to me with open arms, abundant in how you love.
Shine your light on me. Make me live in the light of you. Let your love enter in even deeper. Let
me love from your loves purity, your loves gratitude and celebration of life right here, right now.
My heart rejoices. The darkness lifted. There is sun on my face. I can see it.
You let me choose you, choose light over darkness, purity over envy. You make my paths straight
and purify my heart that I may receive even more of you.
You shine your light on me. I sing praises to your name. This day is holy. This day is hope. This
day is beginning. This day is glory. This day is light. This day is truth. This day is love.
This day, the one I share with you.
In Jesus name,
Amen
11
,
FORGETTING MYSELF TO RECEIVE MORE OF YOU
Dear Father,
I have such a hard time not comparing myself to others, sometimes. I know you made me, just like
thiswith this face, these hands, this frame. Youve given me my mind to think and learn and be-
lieve and doubt. Youve given me my body to serve you, love you in my loving others. Youve given
me my heart to listen to you, heed you, obey you, follow you. I want to give all this back, Father.
I want to give back all youve given.
Let my mind be open, my body be willing, my heart be soft.
You keep giving, and I want more. I want to be consumed by you. I want to live out the glory of you
in mein all your fullness. But dont let me get in the way. Let me desire you and be emptied of
me. Let me seek you and be forgetful of me.
Let me see you, how you look at me, knowing I am safe and secure and do not wish I were differ-
ent than the beauty of whom you have made. Let me compare myself to no oneonly content to
study you, Jesus.
Your eyes . . . I trust you. Your hands . . . I feel you. Your heart . . . I follow you.
Here I am. Fully open. Fully ready. Fully expectant and energized and alive, only for you.
In Jesus name,
Amen
13

WAKE ME UP
Dear Father,
I dont know how to start this day with you well. When I dont know how to pray, you turn me
around, give me words. You know my every thought, my every move. You wake me in the morning
with a promise of todays goodness.
Father, this is the life youve given me. This one, and I fail to to see you in it most of the time. I
see the girl with the shiny hair and pretty smile and imagine her life must be easy. It all looks so
good from here. I get distracted from what youve given, turning my eyes away from what is in
front of me. So many gifts I have become blind to truly see.
Wake me up, Father. Give me new eyes, a new heart, a new way of experiencing and living out the
dreams you want to unfold for me.
Right here.
Right now.
I know you dont hold yourself back from me. I know you dont withdraw and leave me all alone. I
know you know my struggles, the way I cry out, desiring a life different than the one youve given
me to live.
Forgive me.
Right here. Right now. Let me see you.
Right here. Right now. Show me your face.
Right here. Right now: Fill me with your presence.
Right here. Right now: Restore the broken parts of me aching for more of you, not more things.
Not a different life.
Right here. Right now. Let me see you in this life.
Right here. Right now. Raise my head to see beyond my circumstances, beyond any obstacles.
Nothing is too big for you.
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Right here. Right now. Show me your kingdom coming, your glory in this space I inhabit, where
my feet meet the ground, where my head lays down to sleep, where I work, where I spend time
with neighbors and friends.
Right here. Right now. Give me courage to be present in the moments of this day, fully with you,
completely awake to what you have.
Right here. Right now. Let me love freely, without hesitation. Without reservation. Destroy wistful-
ness in me. Quiet distractions from regret and desires taking me away from you.
Right here. Right now. Come for me and let me take a step, and then another, deeper into your
presence, deeper into your glory. Let me behold you. Let me see you. Let me feel you. Let me hear
you. Let me inhabit your space.
Yes, right here. Right now. Let me surrender all of me to you and be the daughter you see.
Right here. Right now. Let me see her. Let me be her. Let me speak with authority and confidence
and move ever more deeply into the identity most true and most beautiful and most humble and
most you.
Yes, let me be fully present, right here. right now. Fully me, with you.
In Jesus precious name,
Amen
16
, ,
A CRY FOR COMMUNITY
Jesus,
I cry out from the desert place, desiring your arms around me, wanting to hear your voice in me,
unsure how to reach you, how to hear you, how to believe you are close. I read about the commu-
nity you collected around you, men who got their hands dirty and followed you with simple faith.
They asked so many questions. And you never tired of answering. You told stories of your Father
and His love and and stayed close to Him, so you could pour His love out to your friends.
Oh, Jesus, thank you for being my friend. I need you, and I want community around me, too.
Teach me more what community looks likehow you went away to be with your father and how
you trusted the people He brought.
I need people around me, Jesus. I need community. I need sisters. I need friends. Give me cour-
age to reach out and pursue people you put in my path. Give me wisdom when I speak. Help me
be vulnerable in sharing my heart. Be my voice. Create a safe space for me, in community, with
you at the center. Be near.
I thank you for the people in my life already. Let me be a beacon, a light shining, your truth in me
and presence with me guiding the friends you bring even closer to you.
Amen
18

BEGIN AGAIN
Father,
My heart cries out for more. Strip away the old ways of this tired, weary heart. Cleanse me. Show
me how I turn away from you, how I ignore you, how I silence the ears of my heart and want to do
things my own way.
Let me die again. This moment. Right here.
I say yes to all you have. I say yes, this day, to more of you. There is no life without you. There is
no hope without you. There is no joy without you.
Oh, Father, set me free.
Free me from worry. You are my King.
Free me from desires of this world. You are my King.
Free me from hatred. You are my King.
Free me from despondency. You are my King.
Free me from laziness. You are my King.
Free me from greed. You are my King.
Free me from selfishness. You are my King.
I give you my heart. All of me. I hold nothing back.
Here it is, the beginning.
With you, my King, my Father, my Savior, I am made new.
In Jesus name,
Amen
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