by John A.

Speyrer

"If guided with kindness and understanding, the schizophrenic experience could become a transcendental ourney of death and rebirth toward a new, more positi!e meaning in life." "" #eter $. %reggin &. '. Toxic Psychiatry "&adness need not be all breakdown. It may also be break"through. It is potential liberation and renewal . . ."

"" ""$.'. (aing

In autobiographical literature, by individuals who have experienced

psychotic breakdowns, one occasionally finds recountings which illustrate the full release of repressed memories. Invariably, these spontaneous re-livings of infantile and childhood traumas erupted during a personal crisis in the biographer's life. One such writer was Lara efferson, who in, These Are My Sisters !"#$%&, poetically describes her dark night of the soul and subse'uent liberation through a spontaneous deep feeling episode while a patient in a mid-western psychiatric hospital during the "#()s. efferson's experiences were of an intense transcendental nature and are also an example of mystical experiences during a psychotic episode. *enneth +apnick, in Understanding Mysticism used her writings for this purpose. ,is article, -.ysticism and /chi0ophrenia'' is contained in this anthology. Lara 1eterson's primal2mystical re-experiencings of repressions on a psychotic ward of a mental hospital at age %#, resulted in such improved functioning that she was soon released from the institution. ,oping to find more material than +apnick 'uoted, I went to the source of his material, 1eterson's, These Are My Sisters !"#$%&, and the 'uotations !reproduced with permission& are from that source.
* * *

In her desire to reassure those readers who one day would also confront the origins of their psychosis as she had, Lara 1eterson wrote3

4emember, when a soul sails out on that unmarked sea called .adness they have gained release, much greater than your loss --and more important.

5hough the need which brought it cannot well be known by those who have not felt it. 6or what the sane call 7ruin' -- because they do not know -- those who have experienced what I am speaking of, know the wild hysteria of .adness means salvation. 4elease. 8scape. /alvation from a much greater pain than the stark pain of .adness. 8scape -- from which could not be endured. 9nd that is why the .adness came. :eliverance; pure, simple, deliverance. . . . <othing will stay it -- there is nothing that can hold it; nothing with the power to deter it when it sweeps out to pursue its destiny through the dim caverns of itself. . . .I have felt it sweep me and take me -where -- I do not know !all the way through ,ell, and far, on the other side; and give me keener sense of feeling that the full edge of reason has& - still, I have no way of telling about the things experienced on that weird =ourney.

Lara efferson's ward physician told her that unless she learned to think differently, she would become incurably insane. *nowing that forcing herself to think differently was impossible, she reali0ed that the =ob of avoiding the descent into complete insanity was totally her own. /he seemed to know intuitively, that to get well, she had to feel what lay behind her mental suffering. /he knew that she could not
. . . escape from the .adness by the door I came in, that is certain -- nor do I want to. 5hey are dead -- past, -- the struggles of yesterday. Let them lay in the past where they have fallen -- forgotten. I cannot go back -- I shall have to go onward -- even though the path leads to -5hree >uilding''-- where the hopeless incurables walk and wail and wait for the death of their bodies.

>ut go back she did. 1erhaps, she reasoned that by facing the problem, she would -lose insanity in madness and find a sound mind on the other side.'' 6inding a pencil, she began writing down her self-progress which helped to keep her from slipping further into psychosis. One day, thoughts of her mother came to her mind, and things her mother
. . . had often said lashed again across my memory. . . .I heard her voice, filled with cruelty sneering, -?ou poor ungodly thing.- . . . 9nd that I had given her such pain because I had not fulfilled all of the beautiful things she had planned for me. . . . I wondered if she were having any delight in knowing that at least I had fulfilled the contempt she held for me when I had failed. I hated her with a fierceness I could not control -- had I wanted to. It raged through me with such intensity it seemed I had lived up to a great destiny in fulfilling that much of her expectations. I shrieked out, before I reali0ed there was no one to take the message; that I wanted her to know before she died of old age that at least one seed she had planted in my very babyhood had taken root and grown; that as she had never been able to see anything but failure in her other efforts, I wanted her to take great pleasure in this one -- for she had nurtured it more carefully than the other things. 9ll my human fear of pain and death and loss of reason was drowned in wild exultation. I stood upon the brink of everything I had ever feared and knew it did not matter how far into any of them I fell.

9s her symptoms worsened during confinement, she became more convinced that release from her mental anguish lay in confronting her schi0ophrenia head-on and not by defending against it. /he thus began a

five day period of attempting, as she put it, to fight madness with madness. 9s she continued feeling the sources of her mental illness, she felt as though something was about to explode inside herself. >ut Lara 1eterson feared the results of feeling her internal pain and re'uested that she be placed in a strait=acket. It re'uired three pleading re'uests, each followed by intentionally bi0arre behavior, before her re'uest was granted, but with her shackeling in the strait=acket, 1eterson felt safe enough to let down her defenses completely. ,er doctor chided her for giving up so easily and re'uesting a strait=acket, but she did not
. . . feel the ridicule, for she was a soul stretched on a rack in a hell very far removed from all ordinary living. 5he opinions of those whom I had left did not reach through to me -- I was too far away. 9nd I do not know whether I was courteous or rude to him. 9s far as I was concerned his significance had ceased. I lay stretched in the humiliation of the thing which had happened. /o the monster was out and the ghost of some old beserker ancestor rose up within me and suggested that I could do something about it, and the fierce hatred exalted that it had possessed itself of a massive and powerful body. . . . 9nd once the great .adness in me found a voice, there was no stopping it. It rolled out in such a tumult I was ama0ed at it myself; wondered where it all came from. It seemed obscene and terrible that I should answer in adult language, things said to me in my childhood. 5hings I had forgotten, until they again began to pour about me in the flood of bitter memories. 8ven incidents I remembered clearly came back so warped and twisted they seemed like evil changelings. . . . I felt so much better that I had at last found the courage to look and see things as they were !not camouflaging them in the rosy light of a meaning they did not have& that I wanted to shout and sing. 5hat voice was reason making a last desperate stand, but it was =ust a shadow and had no power to check the things I was feeling. . . 9ll my human fear of pain and death and loss of reason was drowned by wild exultation. I stood upon the brink of everything I had ever feared and knew it did not matter how far into any of them I fell. . . that wild thing within me stood erect and laughed peals of laughter not good to hear. . . /o the last connected and coherent thing in my thinking gave way -- and the .adness filling me re=oiced. >ecause at last there was nothing to stay it, it shouted and exulted with a noise that tore my throat out, charging through me till it nearly dragged the life out of me. 1art of my mind stood there and took in the whole situation, yet could know nothing about it. 5he thing that was raging did not seem wrong to me then -- but the rightest thing in the world -- a magnificent accomplishment.

9fter five days, her feeling episode seemingly over, her restraints were removed, and she was soon discharged feeling better than ever. /he wrote, -8very nerve and fibre in my whole body registered the effect of what I had been through. .y whole chemistry had changed. 5ruly I was a different person.* * *

")hen analytically ad usted psychiatrists ha!e recognized that the content of the psychosis is *cosmologic,* we need not a!oid the next step, that of analysis of cosmology itself, for then we shall find that it is nothing other than the infantile recollection of one*s own birth pro ected on to +ature." "" ,tto $ank in The Trauma of Birth -./0/1

Another early explorer of the region of acute psychosis or rather of

spiritual emergency was 9nton >oisen. ,e was a forester, minister and language teacher and believed that there is an important relationship between acute psychotic reactions and resultant transpersonal experiences. 5his became apparent to him in "#%" when he was confined in a state mental hospital. ,e felt -. . . that certain types of mental disorders and certain types of religious experiences are alike attempts at reorgani0ation.'' +hen the experience is -successful,'' >oisen believed that it is recogni0ed as a religious experience that can transform one's character. +hen -unsuccessful,'' it becomes known as insanity. ,e wrote in, The Exploration of the Inner World3
. . . !5&o be plunged as a patient into a hospital for the insane may be a tragedy or it may be an opportunity, and believed that his experience led him ''. . . to look with favor upon ung's idea of a racial unconscious as the hypothesis best suited to explain the facts not merely in my own experience but in that of the patients with whom !he had& been working.

,is writings, and the writings of those whom he interviewed, placed more emphasis on transpersonal consciousness than did the writings of Lara efferson. >oison writes that -the disturbance came on very suddenly and it was extremely severe. I had never been in better condition physically; the difficulty was rooted wholly in a severe inner struggle arising out of a precocious sexual sensitivity dating from my fourth year. . . +ith the onset of adolescence the struggle became 'uite severe. It was cleared up on 8aster morning in my twenty-second year through a spontaneous religious conversion experience which followed upon a period of black despair. . . . 5hen came a love affair which swept me off my feet and sent me forth on the adventure which has resulted in this book.9part from the paragraph above he does not detail exactly what caused his mental breakdown, and feels it -wise- to not give more personal details. ,owever, based of the frugal information given above, those of us in regressive-type therapies can easily surmise the source of his breakdown. >oisen mentions that he -failed to make the grade- with the ob=ect of his love. 9fter nine years of -wandering,- he was hoping that he would become -reinstated with her. . . .In "#%) such a -reinstatement- did occur. 5he disturbance followed shortly after by . . .- feelings of world catastrophe, followed by environmental and natural resources shortages. 5he presence of forces of evil were made known to him. ,e felt terror. 5ime became compressed. :uring hospitali0ation, he came to the conclusion that many of the problems of the mental hospital clients were -because of . . . religious and psychological aspects- which must be recogni0ed before they can be treated. /oon thereafter, he was to become the first mental hospital chaplain in the @nited /tates. >oison, p. "$.
"

9bout his -delusions,- he wrote,

. . . !5&he experience at the 1sychopathic !hospital& seemed to me that of

passing through all the stages of individual development from the single cell onward. 9t the same time I seemed to be passing through all the stages in the evolution of the race. A/ee, on this website, 9 1ersonal 8xperience in 1rimal 5herapy by >ernadette .urphyB I was carried back to the period of the deluge, back to the age of marshes and croaking frogs, back to the age of insects and also to an age of birds. I also visited the sun and moon and . . . I even roamed all around the universe. .y conscious self was indeed down in the lower regions at the mercy of all the strange and terrifying phantasms which were to me reality. It was a terrific life and death struggle in which all accepted belief and values were overturned, and I did not know what to believe. !>oisen pp. ""$-""C&

9fter his terrifying but eventual redemptive exploration of his -inner mind,'' psychosis and its relationship to mysticism became a profound interest. ,e began devoting much time to a study of others who had also experienced such a life-changing experience. Images of re-living the evolution of one's forebears, living prior lives and episodes of astral pro=ection were common experiences described in his book. 4ecounting the story of ames D., >oison 'uotes him as having written3 -I had a vision and it seemed as if I could see way back to the beginning of all creation. I could see the evolution of man up to his present being.'' !>oisen, p. "CE& >oison also writes about 9lbert +., who lived earlier lives during his -psychotic- break.
-9t one time he had been onah. ,e had also been /t. 9ugustine. 9nd he had been Fhrist.'' >ut he also took trips beyond the earth's confines. -:uring his severe disturbance he thought of himself at times as roaming around the universe. !>oisen, pp. %)-%"&

>oisen believed that

. . . a critical study of the inner world of thought and feeling and volition, as it is revealed to us in the great crisis experiences, when the results, for better or for worse, of the individual's experiments with life are being unfolded, may also contribute something to our understanding of man's nature and destiny. !>oisen, p. "#%&

>oisen wrote3
.ost persons in these periods of crisis feel that their eyes have been opened to unsuspected meanings and possibilities in their life. 5he so-called -normal'' range of vision becomes for them inade'uate and superficial. . . . 8'ually common were ideas of death and nullity. . . . 5heir eyes had been opened so that they could see back to the beginning of all creation. 5hey had been first one and then another historic character. /ome even thought of themselves as passing through the various stages of animal evolution. /everal thought they were =ourneying all around the universe, visiting .ars, /aturn and the moon. . . !>oisen p "#G&

)hether these intense feeling experiences described by 1eterson,

>oisen, and others had lasting benefits is not known. @nfortunately, information is not available as to the 'uality of life the various sub=ects

en=oyed after their discharge from psychiatric hospitali0ation. ,owever, it is known that >oisen suffered one relapse into psychosis but shortly thereafter returned to good health.

5he transpersonal and other deep feeling experiences encountered during the active phase of psychosis are usually one-time occurrences brought about by extraordinary depths of despair. It seems that the onetime breaking down of defenses with resultant insights is not sufficient to allow continued access to the material which was the source of their mental illness. 5he author of.ysticism and /chi0ophrenia, writes that -there is nothing in the reports of recovered schi0ophrenics to suggest that once having freed themselves from the pathological patterns of their pre-morbid living they continue to explore those inner experiences that had previously overwhelmed them.'' !+apnick& /uch a one-time lowering of defenses is to be distinguished from primal therapy with its continual returning to the fount of repressed feelings over a long period of time accompanied with the methodical lowering of defenses. 5his gradual reduction in defense levels over time allows the primaler to feel his repressed pain in a self-governing measured amount. 1erhaps this explains why continued access to the overwhelming pain which triggers psychosis, does not occur to those who have made an initial foray, either real or symbolically, into their childhood and birth traumas. Often, it is not until the very end of primal therapy, after many years of feeling lesser hurts, that the more severe and intense infantile and pre and peri-natal traumas become accessible. In primal therapy, according to 9rthur anov, it takes approximately six months before the patient's defenses are lowered enough to permit automatic spontaneous regressions into one's storehouse of primal pain. anov calls the time after this period, the -point of no return'' and from that period on, believes that it is merely a 'uestion of allowing the repressed feeling material to connect to consciousness whenever it is triggered or whenever it arises of its own accord. 5his time period is actually 'uite variable, as some highly defended individuals may re'uire a much longer period to reduce defenses sufficiently to allow for natural and automatic access. In my own case, with my first primal, I had begun a course from which I could not turn away even if I had so wished.

9nother regression-based psychotherapy is /tanislav Drof's holotropic breathwork!tm& 5his therapy combines rapid breathing with feelingful music to access birth, infantile and childhood repressions, as well as transpersonal experiences. .y belief is that in holotropics the lowering

of defenses is not systematically done in a gradual manner and for this reason continued voluntary and automatic access of one's repressions are uncommon. In fact, in this therapy, clients are discouraged from attempting to access their repressed material on their own. 5he transpersonal episodes of evolutionary biological recapitulations, prior lives, and out-of-body experiences described in >oisen's The Exploration of the Inner World, are typical of the material which experiencers often explore in holotropic breathwork, but much, much rarer among primalers. Occasionally, primalers will access this material. ,owever, I believe that this access is the result of an inordinate reduction of defenses with a resultant flood of unconscious material. 5his commonly occurs with the ingestion of large doses of psychedelic drugs or in holotropic breathwork. I believe that the massive reductions of one's defenses in breathwork therapy do not reduce defenses in an orderly fashion, and therefore holotropic breathwork, unlike primal therapy, does not lend itself to be a do-it-yourself pro=ect !/peyrer&. ,owever, /tanislav Drof writes that the material which is felt is the material which is next-in-line to be felt. ,e writes that this choice of material is an automatic process.

One mystic about whom much has been written and who was psychologically examined !although superficially& was .adeleine Le >ou. 1ierre anet, a contemporary of 6reud, in his last book, The Anguish and the Ecstasy !"#%C& wrote an interesting case study of .adeleine, a patient who combined aspects of schi0ophrenia, transpersonal experiences and mysticism. 9 short but interesting recounting may be read in The Birth of Neurosis by Deorge 6. :rinka, ..:. .uch of the material in this article is from that source and from 9dolf ,oll's The Left and of !od. anet was a psychologist at the /altpHtiIre, a charity hospital in 1aris where .adeleine became his patient in the "E#)'s. 9lthough she had many bi0arre symptoms, he compared her to prominent church mystics, such as the FurJ d'9rs and /t. 5eresa of 9vila. 8arly in life she devoted herself to Dod and often was lost in long reveries. >elieving her family too rich and an impediment to her spiritual aims, she had moved to the slums of 1aris where she could devote her life to helping the poor, the sick and the dying. /he had spent nine years caring for a woman dying of cancer and felt that period of her life was the most satisfying. 9rrested after spending the night on a park bench, she had been un=ustly accused of stealing, begging and prostitution. 9t the /altpHtiIre she confided to anet her crucifixion and assumption !as the Kirgin .ary& fantasies. /imilar to /t. 6rancis of 9ssisi, she also displayed slight stigmata - as the wounds of Fhrist were manifested on

both her feet and hands. 8nduring periods of agonies as well as ecstasies she would often stand transfixed motionless for an entire day, not eating, drinking, sleeping or performing bodily functions. 9t times .adeleine felt that she had accomplished a unitive fusion with Dod. ,er descriptions of such experiences were similar to those of 5heresa of 9vila3
-/he swung rapidly back and forth between imagining herself consumed in a pure union with Dod and seeing herself entwined in a sexual liaison with the Dod-man Fhrist. /he confided to anet3 '.y being is drunk with divine kisses. 9h, if I could communicate to you what I have experienced. . . . I have =ust passed a night of love and madness. ?es, it is true, Dod has made me mad with love . . . cascades of tenderness which drown me. :o not let me think that I only dream. I feel that I truly love Dod in all manners . . . I could say to Dod3 Lord, you wish to make me die of love. .y heart is too weak for the torrents which you spell in the spiritual goodness of the Fhurch, the principal virtue of the holy person is in the purity of his body parts =ust as the strength of /amson resided in his hair.'- !:rinka, pp. G$%-G$G&

:uring her ecstasies she was transported to important times in Fhristian history as she became the great historical personages themselves. -/he took on the role of Fhrist in the womb of .ary, and then she was the Kirgin .ary herself, pregnant with Dod. 5hen, she was esus born in the manger, .ary holding the child. >ack and forth - Dod, woman, lover, sufferer - the ecstasies flowed from moment to moment.- !:rinka, p. G$G& 5he power of the body2mind relationships reveals itself as when .adeleine's breasts grew heavy with milk around Fhristmas-tide so as to feed baby esus. !,oll, p. "##& 9part from religious manifestations, she experienced many out-of-body experiences and as some mystics who proceeded her, en=oyed astral pro=ections to the netherworlds of the universe. /he saw new planets and new suns opening before her eyes. /he witnessed the apocalypse, was aghast at the world being annihilated, and felt the earth being unredeemable./he describes her ability3 -+hat an indescrible pleasure it is to keep moving with your feet off the ground, the imagination cannot impart the sweetness you feel when you can fly all over in this way.A,oll, p. "EEB -I seem to be careening through the air, traversing space with the swiftness of the wind . . . I climb to the top of precipices in a moment, I descend into valleys, then upward again.- /he confided to anet that she was so happy that she never wanted to be cured. /he was able to taste sweetness, to smell -satiny perfumes- as every sensory organ of -her body was enraptured with volumptous pleasure . . . .- /o intense were her feelings that they could not be described. !:rinka, p. G$G& /ome of these pleasures were described by her to anet, but their recountings were later expurged by him and never publishedL A/ee my review of 5ranscendent /ex3 +hen Lovemaking Opens the Keil, by enny +ade, 1h.:& One day she was ecstatic the next, wretched with misery. ,er -dark night of the soul,- which all mystics seemingly are called on to endure, -. . . were the periods of torture, of melancholy, of soul-searching and self-doubt.- !:rinka, p. G$(& :uring those times she suffered unbearable pain. /he began to believe that she was dammed, that she was hated by

Dod and like other mystics sometimes felt that her pleasures were merely tricks of the devil. In an attempt to cure her, anet often pointed out how her catastrophic predictions made in letters to 6rench officials had all come to naught that they were merely her delusions. In vain, anet tried to teach her his agnosticism, his sense of reality and his belief that a good Dod would not permit the evil which exists in the world. +ith time, her manias and depressions came into a subdued e'uilibrium. 9lthough she remained a devout Fatholic for the rest of her life, she experienced far fewer ecstasies and depressions. :ischarged at age (M from the /altpHtiIre in "#)(, after a six and one-half years stay, she began living with her sister. +hile hospitali0ed she had written anet daily letters and after discharge she continued the correspondence on a weekly schedule continuing this practice up to, and during the 6irst +orld +ar. anet was surprised that .adeleine never reminded him that she had prophesi0ed -blood in the streets- of 6rance, as that war had become known as -the greatest catastrophe in recorded history.1ierre anet believed .adeleine's weird delusions were ama0ing symbols, but in spite of the enormous amount of time he spent in listening and talking with her, his efforts were no more than talk therapy in an attempt to convince her that his view of reality was more rational and reasonable. It is doubtful if he had ever helped her mental condition other than having the role of an attentive friend.

,oll !see references& writes of many incidents of mystical origins beginning with udaism and extending to the time of 6rederick <iet0che. +hether the happenings are those having to do with religiously spiritual material, or psychiatrically induced occurrences, the author has no conclusions to make, and describes them as the work of the ,oly /pirit expecting the reader to distinguish between the two based on their own personal interpretation. 9s mentioned, one sub=ect of ,oll's panoramic study was also 1ierre anet's patient, .adeleine Le >ou. Like many of the women mystics of the .iddle 9ges, .adeleine, was also anorexic. 9nd like some of them she was also a stigmatic, that is, she bore the wounds of the passion of Fhrist. anet believed that the sources of -nervous loss of appetite- had its origin in very deep psychologically repressed material. A/ee 9. anov's, Imprints" The Lifelong Effects of the Birth Experience p. %C$ and 8cstatic /tigmatics and ,oly 9norexics3 .edieval and Fontemporaryby /.*.6arber.B On occasion the Fhurch did not know how to respond to these mystics, especially the female ones. /ome had been frauds; some were persecuted. 5he sacraments of the Fhurch could not compete with the

mystical experiences of Dod. ,oll also writes that, during the .iddle 9ges, -!m&any of these female virtuosos of divine intimacy voluntarily became beggers and wandered over half of 8urope; others lived under the roofs of women's refuges.- ! p. "E#.& 5he origins of the material used in the hallucinatory visions of the mystics are explained by 9dolf ,oll as -. . . the images that the painters and sculptures of the time included in their repetoire.- p. "## A9lso see 6arber's comments about this matter.B

/ome psychotics resent the episodes of clarity which sometimes intrude into their lives. <obel mathetician pri0e-winner, ohn <ash, r. was 'uoted in his biography, A Beautiful Mind3 -4ational thought imposes a limit on a person's concept of his relation to the cosmos.- 1robably more than one founder of a religion have echoed that sentiment. NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
.

'r. 2rank (ake, in his monumental work, -.030 pages1 Clinical Theology, A Theological and Psychiatric Basis to Clinical Pastoral Care, -./441, wrote of the potential of the short"li!ed psychotic paranoid attacks, of the type that %oisen experienced, on one*s spirituality. "I ha!e myself been in close contact with se!eral patients during psychotic episodes which became, for them, times of transformation of personality in an entirely beneficial sense. )hat seemed to be a disintegrating and shattering loss of sanity pro!ed to be part of a more massi!e integration of hitherto repressed and unacceptable memories of infantile terrors of psychotic intensity. In the inscrutable economy of the spiritual order, those whose courage and power of being has been enhanced so as to make the endurance of e!en psychotic experience possible, become thereby *stablished, strengthened and settled* as they ne!er were before....5he psychotic episode may lea!e behind it a more constricted personality and a more peculiar and dissociated and pseudo"mystical pattern of religious life. -pps. ///".6661

- n the course of his own therapy sessions, one of ung's colleagues, the 1rague psychiatrist /tanislav Drof, came across those same collective, prototypical images that ung called archetypes. 9t first Drof worked with L/:, then with hyperventilation or accelerated breathing. >y these means, participants are able to reach an altered state of consciousness and to experience once again the trauma of their birth, with all the anxiety and trepidation that accompany the unborn child as it makes its way into the light of the world. Drof expressly mentions apocalyptic visions in his account of the various images that are sighted on such a =ourney. :ragons, for example, may appear, or angels and devils in deadly combat, right up to the final release from all anxiety, with a great deal of light and radiant colors, as in the last two chapters of ohn's Apocalypse, where the bride of the Lamb comes down from heaven in the form of a golden city with twelve pearly, glittering gates. Drof makes no sharp distinction between psychotic disturbance and mystical ecstasy. ,e simply accepts the ability to integrate one's experiences into everyday life as the boundary line between a clinical and a religious episode. 9ccording to Drof, the -transpersonal- sphere includes both saints and madmen. 5his conclusion is theologically acceptable too.-

"" Adolf 7oll, The Left Hand of God: A Biography of the Holy Spirit -.//31

$eferences

%oisen, Anton 5. The xploration of the !nner "orld, 7arper 8 %rothers, +ew 9ork, ./:4. 'rinka, ;. 2., &.'. The Birth of #eurosis: $yth, $alady and the %ictorians, ./3<. 7oll, $udolf, The Left Hand of God: A Biography of the Holy Spirit , .//3. #eterson, (ara These Are $y Sisters, 'ouble"'ay %ook =ompany, +ew 9ork, ./>0. Speyrer, John A. Primal &eelings #e'sletter, "2rom #rimal to 7olotropics and %ack**, Summer, .//>. )apnick, ?enneth "&ysticism and Schizophrenia" from (nderstanding $ysticism edited by $ichard )oods ,.#., 'oubleday and =ompany, +ew 9ork, ./36.