today is the happen

manuel arturo abreu 2014

today is the happen

manuel arturo abreu

Copyright 2014 Manuel Arturo Abreu. Covert art by tpn arse!" in the publi# domain.

All rights reserved. $o part o% this boo! may be reprodu#ed in any %orm or by any ele#troni# or me#hani#al means" in#luding in%ormation storage and retrieval systems" &ithout &ritten permission %rom the author" e'#ept in the #ase o% a revie&er" &ho may (uote brie% passages embodied in #riti#al arti#les or in a revie&. )rademar!ed names appear throughout this boo!. *ather than use a trademar! symbol &ith every o##urren#e o% a trademar!ed name" names are used in an editorial %ashion" &ith no intention o% in%ringement o% the respe#tive o&ner+s trademar!. )he in%ormation in this boo! is distributed on an ,as isbasis" &ithout &arranty. Although every pre#aution has been ta!en in the preparation o% this &or!" neither the author nor the publisher shall have any liability to any person or entity &ith respe#t to any loss or damage #aused or alleged to be #aused dire#tly or indire#tly by the in%ormation #ontained in this boo!.

)his boo! is dedi#ated to my dear %riend /eidi 0hitehouse.

contents:
poetry
8 minutes app for optionally undoing puberty lamprey emoticon my heart is a finch a day spent morphing from 'the tiny manifestos' alternative sources cartoon wrath wait for glows because cars can fake smiles forget us when you get cold a list of 10 things i thought of eyelid all along speak tongues and faint upon being gravely summoned untitled curating water critical theory buzzwords as coping mechanisms sockshare a piece from 2006 called 'dad' My feelings are shaped like a body fake dark !"#$%& &%&"'!(& all anyone ever wants clues for the pinker shout everything started happening after rehab 3 4 6 7 8 10 11 13 15 15 16 17 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 29 31 33 34 35
1

photos
i can't have casual conversations my baby absent referent microwaved ocean 1 google maps glitch town screencaps untitled portrait found image microwaved ocean 2 found image )what is a right*+ diy hypnotherapy the inscriptions are everywhere 5 6 9 12 13 18 21 30 36 38 39

8 minutes

glass voi#e and animal ears glass throat #lin! to a halt" !neel then sound o% intangible ma#hines #up dra&n too %ull %alling bodies don1t #ut #orners they %orm patterns s#reams go up li!e hands o% smo!e pigeons" un%urnished &ingspans i hear a sound and loo!2 3ust the ba#! o% my head in a dar! la!e i am al&ays the ophelia dry %lo&er" bent light stigma dilate time" dar! o% heartness s(uirting &a'" thrumming moves through &ith a di%%erent going a dar!er pa#e and #loying #ats lie there%ore they #an &rite poems mus#les un#oiling li!e %lo&ers or &indo&s in 4 minutes the sun1s mouth &ill be #losed #losed %orever

app for optionally undoing puberty

there are only &rong &ords 5o 6 don1t &orry about it too mu#h every time i s&allo& it hurts 3ust enough to #ommuni#ate %un#tionally" is e'hausting" being e'hausted is something 6 am ama7ingly #apable o% to spea! in su#h a &ay that i have to repeat mysel% the &ords have their ears i !eep repeating 1no map &ithout tongue1 i 3ust &ant more time to thin! o% a response having a hard time getting over our #onversation arti#ulating the resonant %re(uen#ies o% the room &e1re in

lamprey emoticon

2999999

my heart is a finch

my e'ternal hard drive is 2 terabytes its name is %iona as in %iona apple there you go this is my big %in#h heart %ar a&ay %rom the #ity li!e a %orest nurse ta!e me to a &hooping shire be#ause i don1t !no& ho& to deal &hen a stoma#h loves a boot the boot goes into %ull &hallop &hite dudes are s#ary sometimes out here i1m lit game mandy moore a big #alm" metadata %or the long haul a 3oy that appears on the outside as terror do you %eel more li!e yoursel% around strangers

a day spent morphing

i ma!e the mista!e thin!ing i am e'a#tly privy to the shape o% that misunderstanding i ma!e an embedding this is the essential #ursory" the node a prin#iple o% nonsense rei%ied %eelings #annot go into airplane mode it+s the #ru#ial %a#et o% a #on#eit no dimension is obstru#ted by thin!ing but the images present a bog to #limb stepping around erasure" %ailure is a strategy a motivated #roo!edi7ing

<

from the tiny manifestos

seems li!e as!ing (uestions should not be li!e shopping seems li!e the best &ay to ans&er a (uestion is to go ba#!&ards seems bad %or me to assume i have no #ommon ground &ith people seems li!e there should be an app %or remembering the beauty o% all %eeling seems li!e &e have to de#ide about the dar! parts o% imagination li!e are they sa%e seems li!e arti#ulation o% possible &orlds does not in#rease the sub3e#t1s happiness seems li!e i am really into balloon metaphors these days" in my head seems li!e my truth bu77es in me" randomly" li!e a %ilament

10

alternati!e sources

=bservation o% the sun reveals As %ar as li%e on earth is the sun is" >ight and heat are not the only %orms o% energy As &ith any other star" the sun ? 0hen &e observe the sun in visible light" the sur%a#e" Another is airglo&. Ablation2 the burning a&ay o% the leading sur%a#e o% an ob3e#t.

11

12

cartoon "rath 6 &ould ride my bi!e into to&n to pi#! up dad1s ne&spaper me never having learned ho& to ride dad never having learned ho& to read to pee! thru radiant logo and put s#re&drivers inside" %ind #lothes boil them until they %inally %it in thimbles As a pile o% atoms 6 am not alive big s#ar vining do&n my dad1s right leg" li!e a strophe mom va#uuming slo&ly. A bubble in honey Mom hated &hen buildings sneered lips part as tho to spea! but they do not spea! their #artoon &rath li!e the #oin in a turmoil o% %auna trains go by slurping thunderheads out my head nervous light that smells li!e bread home %rom the hospital dad says ,my spine1s li!e a riddlenone o% these trains are ours the spar!s on the tra#!s are li!e rats someone &al!s past" meaning is not use it is doubt

1.

14

"ait for glo"s because cars can fa#e smiles @ro!en trains o% thought are li!e blo&holes memory e'pands &ithout us #at#hing up A ro#! #an meditate on the taste o% allergy pills soon a%ter it ta!es a #old sho&er the stru#ture o% the pearly rain Alease try never to thin! o% ghosts as ne#tar please remember humans haunt ghosts magi#al thin!ing is #ir#adian the radius o% despair is a hurt nest 6 s&ear to you that everything is inside this balloon satellite

forget us "hen you get cold angle sun %ar#e age balloon momentum sphere... never" ne#tar roared mimi# line&or! grab bran#h intuit kin po!e strobe meat

18

a list of 10 things i thought of

1. 5trangers. 2. )he #ombinations o% &ind. .. Bar! &et stones C the %at &orms under them. 4. )a!ing a pie#e o% a #amera+s soul &henever a pi#ture o% me is ta!en. 8. 6magining the air 6 breathe as string. :. My %eet are hands. ;. My hands are eyes. 4. Dradi#ating my o&n voi#e. <. )he &orld resonating through me in those moments &hen it+s engorged &ith meaning. 10. @eing able to pay attention to mysel%.
1:

eyelid #allous pran#e hold it longer be the smo!e tiny #oughing #oughing #lo#! rounded rain blur a no#turne drape the street #a!e the body hungry grin s&ollen #orner nappy light Erepeat %or every blin!F

1;

14

all along

1<

spea# tongues and faint

my heart moves not to a #lave in this pathmar! this is the duty o% the un&andering you spurn me at an o#ean li!e bla#! #ellophane &hite bea#h and %orms thro&n on the &all your s!in had the orange rind #andy smell ma!e me &ant to spea! tongues and %aint here no&" the s&allo&ing room that i %ear i #an disguise you no longer in my usual #old metaphor my dar! parts thrush li!e tra%%i# i &al! around your #ity li!e i1m inside a throat my heart beats to the pa#e o% your boo!mar!s going no&here &ith the bliss o% gone ruths i have never met anyone named ruth

20

upon being gra!ely summoned

pale orange room li!e a sundress as she %eared it &ould not be yet a%ter a glan#e %or la#! and upon being gravely summoned she spirits a&ay all her pity.

21

untitled

)he do&ntrodden e&e in a %ield o% empty #ashe&s C a paranoid &ind ble& by2 the &orld in the mind o% a %ly.

22

curating "ater the %a#e the gentle gi% blo&ing in the &ind G the star! #onte't the %a#e again the bro!en &ord the pulling %inger the &ay the shoe sho&s &ear the gentle lungless moon li!e a &orm breathing through its s!in the %a#e is &eaponi7ed return to in%inite embra#e an intimate ar#hite#ture li!e a pin!er #ave the %a#e bro!e &ords li!e pimple in song a #arving &his! Hverb9 radiant utmost embra#e

2.

critical theory bu$$"ords as coping mechanisms

postIpostI#ontinental antiIrationalist appropriation aestheti#s" ontologi7ed sublimity o% a%%e#tInet&or!s" augmented spirituality" the &ithdra&al o% the identi%iedIob3e#t into an abundan#e o% the sensory Hthere are al&ays more a%%e#ts than ob3e#tsJob3e#ts are multiplyI an#hored &J a%%e#ts9" antiIa##elerationist ob3e#tIoriented deIontology" dismantling o% the tyranny o% positive propositions" a##eptan#e o% parado'" 1 shi%ting a&ay %rom 3udgment" unlearning the shame &e have o% having internali7ed #ategori#al thin!ing in order to start dismantling the #ategories in earnest instead o% 3ust aestheti#i7ingJ%etishi7ing the dis#ourse o% dismantlingK. lmao

24

soc#share

6 am #ontused in the vein o% polyp sa#risties %orgetting the engine o% lustJidiot #ompassion that murdered us in the %irst night L Mou are #on%used in the %ield thin!ing nature is blea! li!e the tor(ue o% a #aden#e remembering ho& 6 hurt you be#ause it is &inter and 6 am a&%ul L hate gro&s li!e #rystals histrioni# in their stillness

28

a piece from 2006 called dad

sterling #ross Hnot sho&n9" glue" gel pen

2:

%y feelings are shaped li#e a body

1 it ma!es me %eel too manhattan listening to leonard #ohen pl7 stop telling me ,the internet is literally helltho bristling in my mani# 7en o% 48 open tabs i do &onder does the internet ma!e us evil and N5hare+ on my timeline a photo someone posted that says ,does the internet ma!e us evil-

*emember &hen desperately &e thre& the airplane pillo& ba#! and %orth C i pretended to hate the airplaine pillo& u said Nthe reason 6 am alive is this airplane pillo&+ 6 pretended to su%%o#ate u %or .se# &ith the airplane pillo&

2;

And &e tal!ed about that OPli' Qon7le7I)orres pie#e Rntitled HAer%e#t >overs9 )he #lo#!s tou#h and are set in syn# during the #ourse o% the e'hibition they unsyn# 6magine a pu77le &hose pie#es #hanged shape as you tried to assemble it

=n a &ells %argo business #ard you &rote ,memory has a shape HS9)he horse and #arriage upsideIdo&n in a #orner /ave you ever sometimes le%t a rash alone to see ho& bad you let it get be%ore you apply #old #reamS

24

fa#e dar#

2<

.0

&'()*+, ,+,(-'.,

she loves O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D1s don1t give a %u#! attitude a rubber band dressing up as a bruise in %ront o% a t&it#hing mirror L O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D seems li!e a good stop to trans%er at but her phone doesn1t have enough battery to #he#! L she remembers that the moment her plane landed O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D #ame on on shu%%le" it seemed #loying a 1per%e#t a##ident1 #ommer#ial

.1

meaning to #li#! 1#itation1 she #li#!s O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D it starts playing" she #ries a little she used to listen to it &ith her brother on a radio" so%t volume under a pillo& her parents didn1t let her &ear pants or listen to se#ular musi# li!e O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D they said it &as satani# her %ather is li!e a demon gel L O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D gives her that %eeling li!e she1s a pe& O=*Q6TD DTD*M=$D ma!es her thin! 1ho& %at #an a #han#e get1 ma!es her say 1dear dad %u#! baseball1

.2

depart from leaf i+m mourn%ul %airy lightning singing" %ar C all (ua!ing in deli#ate slimes. my dream o% al&ays beginning has the tor(ue o% a hand" emptying.

..

clues for the pin#er shout

1. )he 3ungle is yello&. 2. An humanli!e head. .. A ro#! in the riverbottom. 4. Aast subsisten#e.

1. )he river is pin!er. 2. )he body loo!s li!e its name. .. >etters in the #ereal or soup. 4. )he ne't #on#lusion you shir!.

1. Ma!e a headdress out o% leaves or out o% &hat &as really going on. 2. Ma!e a headdress out o% limbs turned ra& plasti# by their hiding. .. )he ro#!s have language li!e tree roots going unseen. 4. )he 3ungle is the hunting" the o#ean o% possible !illing" not only the pla#e it happens.

.4

all anyone e!er "ants

.8

.:

e!erything started happening after rehab as a %at #hild i #ouldn1t do handstands and %eared being ransa#!ed by s&ans the tiny #hamber ms. trun#hbull %rom matilda lo#!ed !ids in turns someone i !no& on i thought about that and i li!ed it my body has al&ays been a heavy system but my god is too small" li!e an army o% #u#!s i love bou(uets o% #onsonants almost as mu#h as bou(uets o% empty rooms my body is a dead battery o% %orgetting do you remember the band #ute is &hat &e aim %or they had that one song ne&port #igarettes or something

.;

.4

.<

ac#no"ledgements
)han!s to my reader. )han!s to my %amily and %riends. 6 love you all. )he image on pages :I; is %rom a Mou)ube video o% )homas Ades U ,otentanz)he image on page 1; is %rom an = Cupid ad that reads ,/er $e& @ody Made /er D' Cry. )his %itness tri#! that1s 3ust %or &omen is %lying o%% the shelves. )ry it %or yoursel%.)he image on page .: is a %rom a Mou)ube video about ant #olony ar#hite#ture.

40

Manuel Arturo Abreu Hb. 1<<1" 5anto Bomingo9 is a poet and artist based in Aortland and $e& Mor! City. *ead more o% their &or! at t&igte#h.tumblr.#om and VBee7ius

H W X 9

41