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During his midlife

crisis, my dad got
really into _____.
Next time on Dr.
Phil: How to talk to
your child about
_____.
I went from _____ to
_____, all thanks to
_____.
_____ would be
woefully incomlete
without _____.
!nly two things in
life are certain:
death and _____.
"embers of New
#ork$s social elite
are aying
thousands of
dollars %ust to
exerience _____.
"y new fa&orite
orn star is 'oey
(_____( "c)ee.
*&eryone down on
the ground+ ,e
don$t want to hurt
anyone. ,e$re %ust
here for _____.
-his month$s
.osmo: (/ice u
your sex life by
bringing _____ into
the bedroom.(
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
0efore I run for
resident, I must
destroy all e&idence
of my in&ol&ement
with _____.
-he healing rocess
began when I %oined
a suort grou for
&ictims of _____.
1ittle "iss "uffet
/at on a tuffet,
*ating her curds
and _____.
-his is your catain
seaking. 2asten
your seatbelts and
reare for _____.
-he &otes are in,
and the new high
school mascot is
_____.
If )od didn$t want
us to en%oy _____,
he wouldn$t ha&e
gi&en us _____.
In his newest and
most difficult stunt,
Da&id 0laine must
escae from _____.
.harades was
ruined for me
fore&er when my
mom had to act out
_____.
"y country, $tis of
thee, sweet land of
_____.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
-he 2i&e /tages of
)rief: denial, anger,
bargaining, _____,
accetance.
0efore _____, all we
had was _____.
3fter months of
debate, the !ccuy
,all /treet )eneral
3ssembly could
only agree on ("ore
_____+(
"y mom freaked out
when she looked at
my browser history
and found
_____.com4_____.
-onight on 56456:
,hat you don$t
know about _____
could kill you.
I sent my whole life
working toward
_____, only to ha&e
it ruined by _____.
#ou ha&en$t truly
li&ed until you$&e
exerienced _____
and _____ at the
same time.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
3 bigger, blacker
dick.
7grading
homeless eole to
mobile hotsots.
"ild autism.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
-he mere concet of
3lebee$s.
,earing an octous
for a hat.
Nunchuck mo&es.
3 sad fat dragon
with no friends.
3n unhinged ferris
wheel rolling toward
the sea.
,hiing a
disobedient sla&e.
.atastrohic
urethral trauma.
1i&ing in a trashcan. 3n ether8soaked
rag.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
Hillary .linton$s
death stare.
-he cororations. 3 sweet saceshi.
*xisting. 3 magic hiie lo&e
cloud.
3 998gallon drum of
lube.
3 i:ata full of
scorions.
2uck "ountain. /ecial musical
guest, .her.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
"ooing. /ur&i&or$s guilt. -he human body.
/wiftly achie&ing
orgasm.
)etting hilariously
gang8banged by the
0lue "an )rou.
0oris the /o&iet
1o&e Hammer.
Daddy$s belt. 'eff )oldblum. -he grey nutrient
broth that sustains
"itt ;omney.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
"e. "aking a friend. -iny niles.
Double enetration. 3 soulful rendition
of (!l$ "an ;i&er.(
!ncoming traffic.
,eaons8grade
lutonium.
Intimacy roblems. 3 dollo of sour
cream.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
/ome really fucked8
u shit.
3 sweaty, anting
leather daddy.
3 slightly shittier
arallel uni&erse.
/ubduing a gri<<ly
bear and making her
your wife.
/ring break+ "y first kill.
;ising from the
gra&e.
0eing awesome at
sex.
)rahic &iolence,
adult language, and
some sexual
content.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
-he mixing of the
races.
Dining with
cardboard cutouts
of the cast of
(2riends.(
2etal alcohol
syndrome.
-aking a man$s eyes
and balls out and
utting his eyes
where his balls go
and then his balls in
the eye holes.
3nother shot of
morhine.
-he day the birds
attacked.
/crotal frostbite. 0eefin$ o&er turf. !ne ;ing to rule
them all.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
3ll of this blood. 3 s=uadron of
moles wearing
a&iator goggles.
)randa$s ashes.
1oki, the trickster
god.
0ullshit. 0asic human
decency.
,hining like a little
bitch.
Pretty Pretty
Princess Dress87
0oard )ame>.
3 0urmese tiger it.
Cards Against Humanity is a trademark of Cards Against Humanity, LLC. Cards Against Humanity is distributed under a CC-BY-NC-SA license.
Puming out a baby
e&ery nine months.
-he new ;adiohead
album.
Death by /te&en
/eagal.
-ongue. 3n army of
skeletons.
-he )oogle.
2inding ,aldo. 3 man in yoga ants
with a onytail and
feather earrings.
Power.