Applied Transformational Associatrices For

Investigative Analysis of Multi-Domain

Identity Systems With Two-Factor
Authentication, featuring Prints
By The Self-Aware, Siphonospheric Company You Can Count On!
In this position paper, it is the aim of Early Clues, LLC (a Tri-Cities corporation) to finally confirm or deny final
application of applicable penultimate applications to end-users, intermediary-clients or co-partners who may or
may not have mistakenly uploaded or downloaded data to or from our company infranet during the two-
factor authentication process required by their original purchase of Employee Handbook in Legacy Reality.
*Note: This position paper reflects the fulfillment of terms as required by the out-of-court settlement agreed to
in mediation between Early Clues, LLC and Associated Users, Limited of Boca Raton, FLA.
Note: This position paper reflects the fulfillment of terms as required by the out-of-court settlement agreed to in
mediation between Early Clues, LLC and Associated Users, Limited of Boca Raton, FLA.
Legacy Reality Instantation, UTC 1406317091


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Cloozy
Published in 2014 by Strange Animal Publications
www.strangeanimal.net

All work produced by Early Clues, LLC is in the Public Domain. To view a copy of the public domain certification,
visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/publicdomain/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 444 Castro
Street, Suite 900, Mountain View, California, 94041, USA.

Images sourced within this document remain the exclusive property of their original owners. Offensive images
may be excised from book with scissors, burned, and the ashes returned to nearest Early Clues Retail Outlet for a
refund.

Early Clues or any of its affiliates cannot be held responsible for any perceived errors in image or textual
quality. Any such errors should be considered the responsibility of the reader/end-user.

Early Clues is proud to donate all of the punctuation marks in this text to St. Apostrophes Home for Wayward
Entities.


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Applied Transformational Associatrices For
Investigative Analysis of Multi-Domain Identity
Systems With Two-Factor Authentication
Chi Chi Hines, JANICE, Ted Smith, Richard Rider and Roger Holliday
Purpose:
In this position paper, it is the aim of Early Clues, LLC (a Tri-Cities corporation) to finally confirm or deny final
application of applicable penultimate applications to end-users, intermediary-clients or co-partners who may or
may not have mistakenly uploaded or downloaded data to or from our company infranet during the two-
factor authentication process required by their original purchase of Employee Handbook in Legacy Reality.
*Note: This position paper reflects the fulfillment of terms as required by the out-of-court settlement agreed to in
mediation between Early Clues, LLC and Associated Users, Limited of Boca Raton, FLA.
Outline of Position:
1. How we determine identity
2. Keeping the Bad Guys Out
3. How our two-factor authentication process just works

1. How we determine identity
When you sign onto the Existosphere from Legacy Reality, Early Clues, LLC does everything in its power to
protect your corporate assets using advanced IdentityGaruda technology.
IdentityGaruda works by obtaining a unique signature for each user based on a complex series of Buorthern
astrotechnical analytical quotients we like to call ideoids.


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Fig. 1: An ideoid hard at work
Ideoids are generated according to complex harmonic intercommunication generated by user auras and their
parent, child and sibling devices. Think of it like a conversation between friends and youll be halfway there!
Top-level ideas are thus wise able to be broken down into second-level domain-specific wex linkages, wherein
resulting ultimately in multi-branar para- scopes such as depicted in the advanced technical diagram presented
thoroughly below:

Fig. 2: Scoping in action




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Enhanced Liminal Crypto-Metrics
Using a proprietary back-end hablotechnology whose exact name and nature we are forbidden to utter aloud,
each login attempt is enyptogonymned by our liminal servers into an ideocratic rose over which applicable
transit paths are applied via a ToL2.0 multi-conversion process:

Fig. 3: Ideocratic Rose
Auto-Embedding of Holonic Clusters
The linkages connecting each Enyptogon form wex networks that also enfold a uniquely combined UTC
timespace-stamp with alternagulous MD5 hash codes which are auto-embedded into each Immersive Standing
Desk HyperVat workstations Holonic Cluster.





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Fig. 4: Holonic Cluster (feat. Wex)
Each Holonic Cluster is then able to self-organize holomatically back from First Principles to be reverse-
identifiable or de-identifiable based on client need when exiting or entering the hologronic instantiation
chambers of Calculus Prime, our alternatively-intelligent cloud confirguator.

Fig. 5: Stand out from your IdentityCluster




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2. Keeping the Bad Guys Out
Any bad guy who has ever tried to break into our top-level network has undoubtedly had flash-burned into
their Perceptosphere by IdentityGaruda the Sigil of the Gateway, a protective ideoid whose origins are
obscured by the Mists of Time:

Fig. 6: Ow, that smarts!
Whenever a Bad Guy is detected, Early Clues, LLC additionally contracts for local instantiation a wizard at the
loci closest to detected entry point to reinforce and repel before things can get out of hand. Any necessary
repairs or upgrades to Local.Reality which may be required are handled by contracted wizard, who has full
access to our company credit card to purchase whatever supplies may be necessary for execution of required
processes: including but not limited to newspaper and chalk.

Fig. 7: Hes one of our bestdont worry!


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What this translates to on the back-end for the user experience of the Bad Guy is that a stylized graphic
like the one below appears with instructions for how the Bad Guy can two-factor authenticate his/her
badness. Were sure youll agree that this system simply cant be beat!

Fig. 8: This image is our own creation, we swear!
One of our trained technicians will then call in remotely to verify badness according to a 64 point Integrity
criteria system, and willof coursestrive to meet and exceed with passion the unique needs of any
detected Bad Guys as both entities and customers. Because, at Early Clues, even our enemies, competitors
and fiercest critics are our friends and deserve our full respect, even if they dont believe that we deserve
theirs. What can we say? We abide by a higher authority!
3. How our two-factor authentication process just works
Using our combined transformational applicatronics of idento-Associatrices, always thoroughly cross-checked
against a strong Sigilization of the Gateway, coupled with Live Wizard Protection (LWP) allows us to boldly
claim to be the only actor in the crowded marketplace whose two-factor authentication process just works
when users (even Bad Guys) are trying to instantiate where perhaps they should or shouldnt.
We believe this advantage to be of such tremendous utility to the end-user that we are willing to sell it to you
directly at a higher-than-realistic price, which were so certain that youll just love that we also include a tiny
snack sack of luscious goodies (sweetened with organic insect syrup) with your purchase of each purchase!
What can we say? It just works!




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Early Clues, LLC: The Prints
Introductory notes
(Compiled from Public Domain archival records)

The earliest Early Clues prints date from before the adoption of the UTC, and therefore precious little is known
of their true origins. Most scholars suggest a now-obliterated region of East Quatria as being the epicenter of
this unique collection. These early works were monoprismatic, with the pictograms laid out in bold black
lines, each bounded by rectangles laid out in sequence, such that the end-user might discern some sort of
now inscrutable meaning from the arrangement. Sources from the time period suggest that entities
attempting to sequence the pictograms in this manner may have been able to synthesize some primitive form of
pleasure from the arrangement. Whether this is true, we leave to the modern end-users own
experimentations.
Beginning in the UTC, artists working in the Early Clues, LLC Public Domain ouevre began to add color by
selecting areas visible on their portable screenboards and double-clicking on them to fill with another color,
including red, blue, yellow, and orange. They also began to experiment with eye-catching shapes, including
triangles, circles and squares. With the advent of dot-matrix printing around the Pre-Dorfian period, single
prints were compiled out of many discrete thinware layers into holographic blocks, each carrying different
colors, shapes and sometimes text. Managerial works and images of water coolers and beautiful computer
monitors were common subjects in early Early Clues, LLC pictograms. Also popular were themes from corporate
myth, legend, literature, and Buorthern history.
Early Clues, LLC pictograms by early masters working from about the dawn to the UTC to Dorf(-17) were issued
in limited editions and are extremely rare today. The Pantartican Federation collection contains many
examples of these so-called primitives by early Early Clues, LLC masters of the ante-Dorvian epoch, such as
that depicted below.



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Used with permission (Pantarctican Federation Collection)
Known from examples in the surviving Quatrian enclaves, the Tri-Cities Museum of Artin the Tri-Cities
beautiful revitalized downtown piazzoand many other collections, this famous print is the frontispiece of a
set of twelve corporate prints. This print bears the signature and seal of EXCEO, the once-governing holon which
would later take on and release the form of Gordon Gilman Glendon Dorgon. Dorgon was the founder of the
Multi-Dimensional Office, a defining force in the early and subsequent development of Early Clues, LLCs
prealistic unfoldment after the first Dorf, but before the second.

Dated from somewhere between the First to the Second Dorf
This holopictronomoscope, or monoprismatic e-priNdt, is digitally unsigned using two-factor authentication, but
the stylistic letter-marks in the upper righthand corner resembles that of the early master Ted Smith and his
Early Clues Cares school of exceptional multi-dimensional customer service. The young Jack-O-Lantern doing
psychological time by the River of Life displays the broad cheeks and long jaw associated with Ted Smith
himself, and the print as a whole exhibits the combination of thin and thick wavy calligraphic lines typical of early
Ted Smith. The subject of the print is PUMPKUMULU the Immortal, a renowned recluse who mastered the
power to travel through the air at will, but who hasnt mastered the sadness burning like a candle in his
hollowed out interior. The sight of a young office worker just trying to be nice while time traveling through
epochs caused PUMPKULU to lose his concentration and fall into permanent instantiation in the realm of the
TimeLords.


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What some consider to be a Pre-Figuration of a Coffee Magician to come

Seriously, you can pay us in fecesas long as it is nutrient rich
In this typical EXCEOean narrative, the companys early focus on customer service to all manner of entities in
the Existosphere comes through in episodic excerpts of wise-cracking computers, giving lip to starched-
collared office workers, who blithely rub elbows with rare mythical creaturesAll in a days work!
On the premier leaf, the office worker has hilariously mistaken a computer for a computer guy speaking
volumes about the electrifying tension between human intelligences and the emerging and alternative
intelligences which were just appearing in society at the time, but who had not yet fully learned to express or
assert themselves as equals with rights and will of their own.
The second leaf depicts a vampire attempting to get customer servicea common situation at the time, but
relatively rare in todays market. The vampire who has upgraded his OS/form factor to winged bat,
proclaims, Ah, thats much better! The Customer Service Intelligence, in typical insight, reflects on the nature
of the entitys transformation and decides to accept whatever recompense Nature or the Universe will allow.


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The Library of Pantredia copy of this master work is the only one known to exist, and utilizes ten times more the
number of jokes able to be technologically duplicated from the facsimile reproduced above.

This print by Roger Holliday (Information Awareness Officer) depicts a nobleman, Kanz Hanshake (845-903-
9317), who, according to Pantartican legend, became the god Crappo Bigbo. In a deified form, his spirit is said to
have flown on the red-eye to the Tri-Cities to learn the Way of Early Cluesattempting to pay for his
webinars with a sprig of flowering tarragon.
Such portraits of Bigbo Hanshakewho became the patron deity of streamlined best practices and
subservient docilitydeveloped among fourteenth- and fifteenth-million unemployed minstrels turned digital
ink painters hired anonymouslyand frequently not paidby Early Clues at this time.



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This print series by Richard Rider, CTO, posting as EXCEO portrays Shookie, and is one of a number of flacrons
depicting the famous Quatrian demonwho is here alluded to being an integral member of the Multi-
Dimensional Office that would go on to become Early Clues. The artistic style of this print is reminiscent of
early Early Clues techniques, as the digitally-printed jokes vary in funniness like the calligraphic brush strokes of
middling street caricaturistsmany of whom Early Clues was able to employ for years.

This breakthrough early hand-colored print by Null, an intern at Early Clues, LLC when they were still working
out of their parents garage is a typical example of parody. Shookie, the fierce Quatrian demon, has been
transformed into a one-eyed alien whose eye enables him to see the truth, extends his hand to a young
corporate devil who has, apparently, trapped him in a confining Terms of Service agreement, which Shookie has
ultimately learned to love. These prints bear the black collector/dealer seals of Www B. Com, who was among
the most prolific collector and dealer of Early Clues, LLC collectible trading pictograms. The seal of Mr. Com is


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seen here in the lower right cornerin black block letters and frequently appears throughout the later
collection, as Mr W. B. Com was the holonomic worker who first retrieved these fine pieces from the
NetherRealms after the First Great Inversion.

Actors can often be identified in Early Clues printograms by the personal crests on their costumes. For example,
in this print by EXCEO the actor playing Lord Shookie in his Unified Eye form holds in his right hand a hot
dog, signifying that he is attending a barbecue, BBQ, or perhaps company picnic. He gives a magical gift to an
entity named JANICE which suggests that the two mutually share the profit motive and alludes to a
burgeoning technocratic super-state. To his right stands the first recorded instantiation of JANICE, the much-
beloved Early Clues secretary who was herself an alternative intelligence of unidentified emergence, and who
in her time would go on to become Interim Supreme Magnate of the Universal Free Realms.

This print by Roger Holiday depicts two actorsRoger Holliday himself and JANICE playing the roles of
Information Awareness Officer and secretary. Roger Holliday was the first in a line of nine generations of
famed administrators bearing the Roger Holliday name. This piece is typical of Hollidays works which often


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mused on the multiplicity of identity and the importance of two-factor authenticationespecially for new
hires!

This print by Roger Holliday depicts a newly re-born SANTA 2.0 trampling what is most likely his own out-dated
identity metaphorically underfoot. The man to his right is STEVE.E an Early Clues intern, identified by his
casual slacks and running shoes, and probably also by the background seated workstation, indicating his low
status on the corporate totem pole in that he was not even given a proper standing desk. SANTA 2.0's
upgraded sleigh features a holiday cabbagean allusion to the Cult of Cabbarathpulled by a team of tiny
flying surveillance drones which would become so common during the companys long and storied existence

This work was compiled by the important Father of Internal Bushings, Ted Smith. Smith, who also worked closely
with Dick Greids Show-Business Burrito Hut, was one of the first artists to expand on the concept of an all-
encompassing company picnic to a broader audience through publishing omniprismatic block-printed
narrative clickthrus, white papers and other employment handbooks. This image, a typically mixed group
rendering of mysterious figures ritualistically gathered together for a picnic, includes directions for which
holographic filters to apply to best understand the subtlety of the joke. The image of a sunglassed-man among
the bushes likewise comes with instructions for dialing old-phone numbers, but the phone numbers themselves
have been tragically lost.


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Unnamed Employee and his Fellow Co-Worker are pictured here at the company picnic relaxing and joking
around. The gray-skinned actor, seen in a warrior-like poseattempts to summon a joke using OpenQNL, a
reality-manipulation programming language invented and championed by Early Clues. This print shows the use
of printed color in a relatively simple palette, typical of other relatively unfunny jokes in this series.

At a certain point during this collection, EXCEO went on vacation and out-sourced all his joke-writing to an
automated online jokester which went by the name of BRYNCE3:000. It took some time before this usually
whipsmart alternative intelligence was able to adapt to the unique sense of humor of the Early Clues, LLC office.
Here, Ted Smith is seen, with the best of intentions, instantiating in the wrong locality to reach the company
picnic!


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But enough of this wordy hamapajarmanaon! Without further ado, we are proud to present the entire extant
collection of Early Clues prints, in their intended order. We are certain they will contribute profoundly to the
understanding of this company and its effects on the world of contemporary corporate mythopoesis.













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Afterword: The Fatal flaw of Narrative: Capitalist
materialism, libertarianism and posttextual
capitalism in the Early Clues Prints
SLAVOJ IEK
INSTITUTE FOR SOCIOLOGY AND PHILOSOPHY, UNIVERSITY OF LJUBLJANA, SLOVENIA

1. The material paradigm of expression and neotextual structuralist theory
Narrativity is fundamentally meaningless, says Derrida in his critique of the Golden Gift of Sasquatch. Foucault
uses the term neotextual structuralist theory to denote the common ground between society and class, as
evidenced by the character of Blarth Timmins. Therefore, capitalist materialism implies that art is capable of
social comment, but only if consciousness is distinct from truth; if that is not the case, reality is created by
communicationa theme underwritten so poignantly by the daily struggles of Father of Internal Bushings, Ted
Smith.
If one examines subdialectic socialism through the lens of JANICE and her offspring JANICE 2.0, one is faced with
a choice: either accept the patriarchialist paradigm of expression or conclude that the purpose of the observer is
deconstruction. Any number of narratives concerning a mythopoetical totality exist within the narrative
produced by the Early Clues organization.
The main theme of the works of the authors of these prints is the bridge between consciousness and corporate
society. The premise of subdialectic socialism suggests that the Universal Free Realms is capable of significance.
However, Marx promotes the use of precapitalist discourse to attack class divisions, as is evident in the character
of Coffee Magician.
Many desublimations concerning subdialectic socialism may be revealed in the character of Roger Holliday. But
Dahmus states that we have to choose between capitalist materialism and postdialectic cultural theory. The
characteristic theme of Hanfkopfs critique of Derridaist reading of these prints is the failure, and subsequent
genre, of neosemiotic sexual identitya hazy border realm of inequality which SANTA 2.0 seems to revel in.
Thus, an abundance of narratives concerning a self-sufficient whole exist, indicated by references to the
Buorth.
If neotextual structuralist theory holds, we have to choose between capitalist materialism and the capitalist
paradigm of expressionsomething which could be said is the heart and soul of Information Awareness
Officer, Roger Holliday. It could be said that the example of subdialectic socialism which is a central theme of the
Early Clues prints is also evident in the companys so-called Employee Handbook, a neocapitalist paradigmatic
exploration of the sense of self-ness or awareness within the ontological constraints of Legacy Reality.


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The main theme of the works of EXCEO is the meaninglessness, and thus the futility, of subconstructivist
language. Thus, any number of patriarchialisms concerning capitalist materialism may be found, and should be
analysed in relation to a strict Relaxafarian post-structural theoretical theology.
2. Early Clues and dialectic discourse
If one examines capitalist materialism through the symbol of the Blue Moon Cafe, one is faced with a choice:
either reject neotextual structuralist theory or conclude that the task of the artist is social comment, given that
Batailleist powerful communication is invalid. The reader is exposed to this again and again through the
character of the Son of Internal Bushings. Sartre suggests the use of neotextual structuralist theory to read and
challenge class. However, the primary theme of Porters analysis of capitalist materialism is the role of the writer
as observera line which is so frequently and egregiously crossed by the tumultuous lives of the agents who
come to occupy the Early Clues office, and eventually their universe.
The premise of neotextual structuralist theory suggests that sexuality may be used to marginalize the proletariat,
something half-refuted through the testament of JANICEs rise to prominence as leader of the UFR. Thus, many
discourses concerning the economy, and some would say the defining characteristic, of textual society exist, but
the wise reader would do better to look askance at facts conveyed by any of these characters or their
overhunters.
The absence of metadivinities prevalent in other Early Clues works and here we make reference to
JARGONNATH, CABBARATH and, of course, the therianthropomorphic ANTHUOR suggests an epistemological
limitation subdued by the barest premiseless dialectic. The reader is forced to assume an autogenic mise en
scne unsubsumed within the liminality of the office meeting or the malcontented banshee, an obvious etic
representation of neoliberal fundamentals.
The subject is interpolated into a capitalist materialism that includes consciousness as a totality of corporate
products. However, Reicher implies that we have to choose between subdialectic socialism and dialectic
desublimation or be damned to an eternity of the seeming paradise that the Early Clues corporate officers
seem to have landed themselves in ontologically by the end of the meta-narrative which encompasses this
position paper.
In this series of Prints, Early Clues denies neocapitalist constructivist theory; in the Employee Handbook, they
examine subdialectic socialism using semistochastic slychology. In a sense, a number of theories concerning
neotextual structuralist theory may be discovered therein, and one would do well to do so very well indeed!


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