Simorgh Magazine Issue 65 Aug 2014

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COM
Vol. 4 - Issue 65 - August 2014
OTTAWAS PERSIAN PUBLICATION
COMING SOON TO
OTTAWA & MONTREAL
SHAJARIAN I WINTER I 2015
613- 366-2278
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Publisher: Simorgh Publication
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Editor: Shahriar Ayoubzadeh
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45
first choose to be ex-centric,

that is, to begin shifting the
focus more towards others. It is
the reason that the first step in
recovery is what I call Desire (or
D1). A person has to desire and
be willing to change, to embrace
a different way of living. Often
at this stage a person, as they
say, has hit rock bottom. There
is nowhere else for them to go.
Pain and suffering are intense
and they are searching for a
better way to live. This pain and
suffering can be transformative
if they embrace the WisdomLeadership Path (or WLP). I call
it wisdom-leadership because, as
the Greek philosopher, Aristotle
(384-322 BCE) said, the
beginning of wisdom is wonder.
For a person beginning recovery
they have already begun to ask
questions by questioning the
legitimacy of how they have
been living up to this point.
They also know on some level
that there has to be a better way.
Recovery is about making lifechanging choices, however
difficult. Such a U-shaped
process has recently been
researched for organizational
change by scholars at MIT and
the transformation managers
and organizations must go
through to give birth to their
new organizational self.1 I will
C. Otto Scharmer. Theory
1
U: Leading From the Future as It
be making reference to some

relevant aspects from their
research that could apply to
the description of our personal
journey to recovery, or how we
stop the cover-up.
For now, suffice it is
to say that since all change
begins inside out, the first step
in the recovery process is a
willingness to change, a desiring
of a better life. Only then will a
renewed sense of hope begin
to emerge. Our imagination to
think differently, to see other
options, and to break the cycle
of what William Lynch (19081987) calls the absolutizing
instinct2 loosen its grip from
endlessly searching and going,
as they say, from pillar to post
with addictive and codependent
behaviours. An absolutizing
instinct keeps grinding away
inside a person to tell them that
there is no way out, no other
option than the dysfunctional
choices they keep making.
They are at a standstill, locked
into themselves, frozen in
their choice-making, endlessly
65
searching, never seeing that

there are other options to the
pain they are experiencing,
never visualizing new choices.
Perhaps Samuel Beckets play,
Waiting for Godot, first act,
describes this endlessness better
than anything where two actors
are describing the futility of
everything and where we read
the following stage direction:
Shall we go nowYes,lets goThey
dono move.
Michael
E-mail: worthplace@gmail.com
Mobile: (613) 898-7733
Emerges. Cambridge, Mass.: SoL

(The Society for Organizational
Learning, Inc.), 2007, 531 pages.
William J. Lynch, S.J.
2
Images of Hope: Imagination as
Healer of the Hopeless. Notre
Dame, Ind.: University of Notre
Dame Press, (1965) 1974, 319
pages.
46
65
these professionals are a blessing. But even here,

in psychiatric situations, the soul is extremely
agitated and the medication may simply be keeping
things calm or keeping the lid on things rather than
addressing the souls disturbances. What I can say
is that a soul neglected for whatever reason will
be a soul fighting for its right to exist in the light
of day. Things that get repressed dont go away;
they go somewhere else besides the conscious
mind: the body, the unconscious, violence, etc.
If, as I indicated above when speaking of psyche
as she, we can then conclude: Hell hath no
fury like a woman scorned! Such fury is present
when soul is denied. As Jung also indicated, the
inner and the outer are the same, that is, ones
inner turmoil is often spread in an outer way on
a spouse, children, coworkers, neighbours, other
races, etc. Courage comes in when one has to recollect and own these projections. Thats true
courage not jumping over barrels hung over
water in reality TV shows! Pogo said it well in the
comic strip years ago, I have met the enemy and
it is I. Inner and outer are the same. When we get
our inner house in order the outer realities of our
lives begin to make sense. Inner turmoil becomes
outer chaos without the desire for insight, courage
and the action (ICA) for self-reflection and soulownership.
Thus, I want to lay out the challenge we
have before us in examining the recovery from
addiction, codependency and attachment (ACA),
three choices and paths that people often take
in their attempts to solve the problem of the
cover-up of their true selves. As I have studied
and accompanied people for more than 35 years
in their journey of recovery, I have been able to
visualize and use a 7-step process I call the 7Step Wisdom-Leadership Path (Figure 1).
47
Figure 1: 7-Step Wisdom-Leadership Path

(WLP)
The 7-Step Wisdom-Leadership Path
accounts for the new choices that a person recovery

from addiction, codependency and attachment
(ACA) must embrace in order to be healed. Its in a
U-shaped image because the change or conversion
a person must undergo to reach freedom is initially
a downward journey but if followed through
will be a journey that leads to great inner peace
and reconciliation. When Benedict of Nursia
(480-560) wrote his Rule for monks in the 6th
century a small piece of wisdom leadership that
has been the backbone of organizational Europe
now for over 1,500 years he tells his followers
in Chapter 7 On Humility that they must first
descend before ascending in becoming humble
or real. This insight fits our discussion perfectly
because the key piece initially in recovery is an
act of humility: that there is a power or Power
greater than ourselves. Our egocentrism would
want us to believe that we always be the centre of
attention, that the world revolve around us. This is
a tough lesson for many to accept, that they must
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65
partner to determine that

reality was measureable. Today
business has the slogan that
what cannot be measured cannot
be managed. To a great extent
yes! but business, for example,
has taken this materialist
thrust (with emphasis on its
commodity-based vision) and
forgot the person doing the work
(known as the meaning-based
vision). Both are necessary.
Human resources management
(HRM) has been an effort over
the past40 years to re-introduce
at least parts of the meaningbased vision. Left to itself a
commodity-based organization
would treat employees as cogs
in the business machine. From
such a vision emerged what
became known as the rat race.
However, Lily Tomlin says it
best: The trouble with the rat
race is that even if you win,
youre still a rat.
So, what has all this got
to do with soul-making? The
paradigm or social contract
over the past 100 years has
only exacerbated the loss of
soul. Much of life today is
quantifiable; success is seen
as getting some thing, some
place, etc. The luxury car maker
waxes eloquent when showing
the consumer that the doors fit
almost 100% a goal they aim
49
to attain, if possible. When I

read these ads, I immediately
think: what if we, as human
beings, were to make such a
claim when it comes to our
desire for ethical behaviour? Or
treating neighbours and others
with dignity and respect? What
I will be showing in this series
of articles is that the materialist
slant in life keeps on driving a
wedge between who we really
are and the idols that are offered.
The idols are often real. Success
can mean getting a bigger
title in the office, climbing the
corporate ladder, getting a new
and bigger car, being known as
a person of importance. Over
the years I have referred to
these idols as seductions and
as the 4 Ps: Persona (seducing
us to believe that image is
everything), Profit (seducing
us to believe that quantity
outperforms
everything),
Power (seducing us to believe
that control is ultimate), and
Prestige (seducing us to believe
that fame equals significance).
These seductions are incredibly
strong in our society; advertising
and marketing offer us these
4 Ps on a constant basis: buy
this! have this! whiter than
white!
My point is: to go within,
address the main task of life to
find and develop soul gets so

sidetracked that we often dont
even acknowledge that there
is a soul let alone attend to its
presence and demands. Dr. Carl
Jung (1875-1961) used to say
that our main task in life was that
of individuation to become the
person that life or God wants us
to be. Nothing else can replace
that. If we do not attend to this
task, we will be like pigs to
the slaughter! We see such
slaughter all around us: obesity,
heart attacks, mental illness,
depression, violence, etc. The
list goes on and on. But people
often dont link these negative
effects to loss of soul; instead,
lifes unfair, or its my boss,
or my husband is driving me
crazy, or I cant, etc. Over the
years I have given a talk called
Where Are the Soul-Makers?
The response has always been
overwhelming, with the main
piece of feedback summarized
from participants as follows:
When I sought out professional
help I was suffering from a
broken heart (or a loss of some
kind). I was treated but my
soul was not acknowledged.
To be fair there are some who
do experience soul-making but
I am talking about those who
seek out more the mainstream
professional help. For those who
need medical prescriptions, etc.,
UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP:

Healing Through Insight, Courage, Action
(ICA)
from Addiction, Codependency and
Attachment
Dr. Michael Rock
Licensed Emotional Intelligence Facilitator
Professor (ret.), Human Relations and Ethics
Simorgh Magazine, August 2014
PART
I
W e
a r e
a l l
wounded somehow or another. We travel a

journey to wholeness. Were not there yet; were
in via, on the way. This in-between zone and
time is called life. Its great to be alive, but we are
also each one of us alive with wounds of one
kind or another: physical, psychological, spiritual.
The extent of our wounds is more or less severe.
Some wounds for some people are more traumatic
than for others. A whole mixture of reasons can
account for some, if not most of the traumas.
Irrespective, while we may be at the limits of our
brokenness, we must never forget that we are also
in the hands of the greatest healer: Life itself. To
forget that is to court more trauma. This article
and subsequent articles will explore what the
cover-up is, the fabric of this cover-up, and the
65
process for healing from the cover-up.

The guiding image that I will be constantly
referring to will be that of soul which for me
is synonymous with person and psyche
referring especially to those innermost depths of
our personhood. Its interesting and ironic at the
same time that the word psychology stems from
such origins: psyche (or soul) and logos (or
meaning of). Thus psychology in its true sense
is the ongoing soul-search for the meaning of life.
This is important because one of the casualties
of modern psychology for the past 200 years has
been this loss of soul. Today, people often look in
vain for what I call the soul-makers, those people
who can address the lostness of soul experienced
by so many today. The question then becomes:
Who are the soul-makers? We can find those I
call mechanics, the ones who help us adjust our
behaviour patterns, the hope being, of course, that
these behaviourists will also implicate change
inside the person. There are also the thinkers,
often called cognitive behaviour therapists, who
try to get us to change the way we think in order
to effect changes in behaviour.
Both approaches can be effective to some
extent. But most psychologies today are bankrupt
of soul in the way I am speaking of; they have lost
psyche and dont know where to find her! Much
of this turn of events happened when the physical
sciences gained momentum after philosopher Ren
Descartes (1596-1650) made the dualistic split
between soul and body with the result that what
was real was only the physical. Not to be left
aside, and wanting to be included with the hard
(read: real) sciences, physics got a bad case of
physics envy, so to speak; this envy only added to
the problem because science had an additional
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Vol. 4 - Issue 65 - August 2014
OTTAWAS PERSIAN PUBLICATION
COMING SOON TO
OTTAWA & MONTREAL
SHAJARIAN I WINTER I 2015

Simorgh Magazine Issue 65 Aug 2014

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Simorgh Magazine Issue 65 Aug 2014

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Vol. 4 - Issue 65 - August 2014

OTTAWAS PERSIAN PUBLICATION

SHAJARIAN I WINTER I 2015

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP

(structural analysis and balancing)

(a branch of Osteopathic manipulation, very gentle)

Conditions commonly addressed:

FREE use of Infrared sauna

249 North River Rd.

Tel: (613) 291-6132

Persian Lunch Buffet

Kanata: 11:00am - 2:00pm

Dine In, Take Out, Delivery

DINE IN TAKE OUT DELIVERY

613 -270 - 8866 Kanata

Dine In, Take Out, Delivery

Commissioner of Oath/Notary Public

)Behzad A. Rezai (Bobby Bar

185 Somerset Street West Suite 305

185 Somerset Street West Suite 305

OFFICE SPACE FOR RENT

A&M Dreams INC Professional building

tel: (613) 261-1356

107-250 Centrum Blvd.

Cell: (613) 617-8115

Signs Banners Graphic Design Business Cards

381 Kent Street Suite 325

Dr. Maryam Hassanzadeh

Book Online: www.kentchiromed.com

?Are you interested in skin care

Become an Independent Sales Representative

For more information please contact me at: (613) 600-6037

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP

first choose to be ex-centric,

be making reference to some

searching, never seeing that

Emerges. Cambridge, Mass.: SoL

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP

these professionals are a blessing. But even here,

Figure 1: 7-Step Wisdom-Leadership Path

accounts for the new choices that a person recovery

SPA Facial, Manicure and Pedicure

My Spa Services Include (mobile/home):

$30 PER SESSION ONLY!

4591 Carrington Place

partner to determine that

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP

to attain, if possible. When I

find and develop soul gets so

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP

UNCOVERING THE COVER-UP:

wounded somehow or another. We travel a

process for healing from the cover-up.

ARYA FOOD MARKET

Radio Parvaz 97.9 FM

Arts Body Shop

Dr. Maryam Hasanzadeh

FREE CLASSIFIED ADS

Immigration Canada 613-238-5462

Vol. 4 - Issue 65 - August 2014

OTTAWAS PERSIAN PUBLICATION

SHAJARIAN I WINTER I 2015

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