Angeles, Dela Cruz, Laygo, Uy

Whats the Big Deal About Marriage

Why is being married the only descriptor of a fully commited relationship?
THREE COMMON OBJECTIONS
Weddings too often say more about wealth and status than they do about a
couples relationship
People often mistake weddings for marriage, in the sense that they dismiss the moral
relevance of a marriage because of the concept of lavish, extravagant, modern weddings
While weddings are an event, marriage is a state of life that begins with an event, namely,
the profession of vows to each other.
Wedding vows are not solely religious, they are also used in civil marriage services
Vow: permanence; till death do us part
1.

People often claim they can be fully committed without having made marriage
vows to each other
What is the point of promising to stay with another person in good times and in bad?
In fact, this may seem like the last thing a person should want to do. If two people no
longer love one another, what is the point of staying together?
It is a commitment to go through life together; to share certain goods in life such as intimate
friendship, openness to the possibility of children, raising of children together, and
participating in life as one
Marriage is NOT a statement of the intensity of love/ a pledge to keep that intimacy alive
It is the best setting for permanence that eventually gives way to the possibility of children
and shared facets of life.
Wedding is the fullest commitment, it is only when divorce happens that we can say a
relationship failed. Other relationships merely end.
Couples can be committed to one another in varying degrees but only in marriage is there a
public promise to stay together for life (117)
Marriage is not security sought by those who are afraid of uncertainty, it is a strong
commitment that contributes to living a good life.
People change, but marriage is a pledge to stay together despite these changes.
As commitment, marriage may seem like an obligation, but from a morality of happiness
objective, marriage is properly understood as a source of true happiness.
One of the most common metaphors to describe Gods love for his people is by equating
that love to to a marriage. Highlighted here is the fidelity and love between spouses despite
infidelity.
Self-giving love and self-giving service to another person whom one pledges permanence to
is the truly living out human creation as imago dei.
No married couple knows whats in store for them, but they know that the marriage is a
promise to make every effort to live into it as they grow together.
2.

People often claim that everything marriage is supposed to signify can be had
without a piece of paper that says one is married
Is marriage necessary for couples to be committed to each other?
3.

TWO RESPONSES

1.

It matters that couples are able to state clearly that they are promising to stay with
each other permanently.
- this ensures that both of them are on the same page
- the sharing of a similar understanding of what it means to be together which
sustains them in the relationship
This form of self-giving love lacks the promise of permanence
- The lack of understanding of what full commitment is
- This relationship is more into commitment in order to make the relationship
work and not about committing to love each other until death.
- Yes, couples may be fully committed to each other but are unable to make
marital vows due to physical and environmental constraints. This becomes a
barrier that prevents a formation of a permanent commitment to be together.

2.

What if a couple is willing to promise permanence to each other? They are willing to
verbally state to one another, and even to others who might ask, that they are
committed to staying with each other in good times and bad, in sickness and in
health, and so on.

Claim:
Such couples work out not because of, but in spite of, their lack of public profession
of marriage vows
Most of us likely know people in such relationships who do indeed stay together,
perhaps even longer than certain married couples we know
What distinguishes the couple described here from the married couple is that their
promises, or vows, to one another are private. If two people know that they love one
another, and promise that love forever, what could be gained by publicly professing
that promise?
It is claimed that public profession of vows add something to the relationship,
something that can be a powerful support for married people and indeed a further
sign of their commitment to each other.
Public profession clarifies the intent of the relationship with the broader community.
Others do not know how to treat a couple on certain occasions
It is important that relationships like this are personal (with the state,
insurance companies, a childs school, etc.)
Other people do not know whether or not the couple intends to make
the relationship permanent
As social creatures, we are shaped by our relations with others; it is only fitting for
others who are in relationship with us to be aware of such central relationship
through public profession(marriage)
The couple makes it clear to others family, friends, the state, others who
may interact with them in formal or informal ways that they are a unit, two
people bound together for the long haul.
Marriage helps people stay together
Why do many couples choose not to marry?
They believe on marriage as a burden rather than a support. This is because of past
experiences such as painful divorce in their families. Yet the question that needs to be asked

here is whether the problems against which they react are inherent to marriage or whether
they are particular to a specific couple.
How does marriage keep couples together?
In tough times when couples dont feel like being married, but experience their commitment
as a burden, marriage vows are a support of the couples freedom, since they have decided
that staying together permanently is indeed the best thing for them.
Marriage is an impetus not just to endure in hardship but to work together and address the
sources of difficulties so as to live again in fulfilling ang relationship with each other.
There are social responsibilities and expectation that come along with being married
and the couple takes on the power of those centuries-old expectations to help shape
their relationship and keep it permanent
Marriage promises not only can sustain the couple in times of hardship, but also
hopefully act as an impetus not just to endure in hardship but to work together and
address the sources of the difficulties so as to live again in fulfilling a relationship with
each other
Staying together simply because they are married is not a good long-term
reason for a couple to stay together
Marriage vows are a support of the couples freedom that staying together
permanently is indeed what is best for them

In sum, being married is importantly different than living together in privately promised
permanence