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For yearsI prayed for a young man I had yet to meet: my daughters husband. I asked the Lord to make
him godly, kind, a great dad, and a good provider. I was proud of a wish list void of unrealistic
expectations. After all, I knew not to ask for a college football quarterback who loved puppies, majored in
nuclear rocket science, and wanted to take his expertise to the mission field. I was an open-minded mom.
But God called my bluff.
This white, 53-year-old mother hadnt counted on God sending an African American with dreads named
Glenn.
Glenn came to Christ in college and served him passionately. He worked while attending classes and
volunteered at church in an after-school program for urban kids. He graduated and found a job as an
application developer for Blue Cross and Blue Shield. I noticed he opened doors for my daughter, Anna,
even at the grocery store.
Godly. Kind. Well on his way to being a great dad and a good provider. I could only smile at Gods plan
and asked his forgiveness for my presumptions. Still, my impressive wish list for Annas husband paled in
comparison to her own: He loves Jesus, Mom. Thats it. Thats my wish list. Jesuslover. Then a grin
came across her face. Its really awesome hes also cute, right? Anna took a deep breath and with a
sparkle in her eyesasked:So, Mom, what do you think?
It wasnt long ago that interracial marriageparticularly a black man like Glenn marrying a white girl like
Annawas considered the ultimate taboo in American white society. (In fact, it wasillegal in 16 states until
1967, when theSupreme Courtruled inLoving v. Virginiathat race-based restrictionsviolated the
ConstitutionsEqual Protection Clause. Hence the film releasing this fall,Loving.)Though I never
sharedthis prejudice, I neverexpected the issue toenter my life.
To the parentlike me whonever envisioned herdaughter in an interracial marriage, here are eight things
to remember when your white daughter brings a black man home for dinner.
She gave a pained smile, and then sighed and shook her head. Its just . . . their future children. They
have no idea whats ahead of them!
I nodded. When Jim and I were married, we had no idea what was ahead of us either. I stopped believing
the lie we could control our trials years ago.
John Piper said it well:
Christ does not call us to a prudent life, but to a God-centered, Christ-exalting, justice-advancing,
counter-cultural, risk-taking life of love and courage. Will it be harder to be married to another race,
and will it be harder for the kids? Maybe. Maybe not. But since when is that the way a Christian
thinks? Life is hard. And the more you love, the harder it gets.
5. Remember your daughters ultimate loyalty is not toyou oryour family, but
to the Lord.
Several people asked Anna and Glenn,Which world will you live inblack or white? But its not his
world, her world, or even our world.
Interracial marriage in Christ is not about the joining of two races and cultures into one. Its notabout a
new ethnic heritage. Itsabout unwavering allegiance to the one true God and all he may require of the
couple as soldiers of Jesus. After all, Christians are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a
people for his own possession, that youmay proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of
darkness into his marvelous light (1 Pet. 2:9).
number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and
before the Lamb, clothed in white robes(Rev. 7:9).
Gaye Clark works as a cardiac nurse Augusta, Georgia, and as a parttime correspondent for WORLD magazine in
the area of sex trafficking. She also volunteers with iCare, a local faith-based organization that provides assistance
to trafficked victims. She writes in her free time. She has two adult children, Anna and Nathan. You can follow her
on Twitter.
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