IN THIS ISSUE:

Report: Sisterhood Meeting....................................................3

Poem: Over time things change.............................................6
YOUR skills in YOUR community........................................7
Dilemma: Pain & Pleasure...................................................8
Article: Muslims and depression.............................................9
The smiley sisters mini project..........................................10
The story of: Umm Sulaym bint Milhan Al-Ansariyyah.......11
Project to support: Baseera...................................................13
How to join the SISTER’S PROJECT?...............................14
The One Hour a Week Project..............................................14
The Muslim Diary................................................................14
REPORT:
Sisterhood Meeting
November 2009
On Tuesday morning the 24th of November we had the first Sisterhood Meeting in the Zawiya to start
building up a group of sisters who’ll meet every month to strengthen sisterhood in Birmingham
and discuss issues concerning our local Ummah. The rainy weather might have kept a few sisters away
who did register initially, but alhamdulillah we came together with a small, but active group of ten sisters.
Please come along to the next meeting! We chose to have this meeting in the morning as well, next time we
can pick an evening so sisters who are working can attend as well.

After an introduction round we looked together at We discussed 5 topics; the website, the skills
the goals of the SISTER’S PROJECT. We came of sisters, our own place, publicity and useful
to the conclusion that although the project started projects. Every topic ended with action points, to
with only four sisters the last months, it’s a which you can give your support as well.
project which belongs to all of us!
So to every sister who likes to make a change to See below and if you see something you like,
those around her and those in need. The goal of the email us on info@sistersproject.co.uk!
website and the Sisterhood Meetings is to come
together as sisters with a focus on the concerns of
sisters in Birmingham and focus on building up a
caring and supportive sisterhood network in our
local area.
3
The website
The website (www.sistersproject.co.uk) has two purposes;
1 - Be a place where sisters feel comfortable to go to when they are in need of anything/have
certain issues.
2 - Be a platform for sisters who want to contribute anything (skills) to the Ummah & to support
each other in Birmingham.

To do website:
1 - Put a list online of (useful) forth coming events in Birmingham which sisters can visit.
2 - Start a blog/column with different articles/ topics which different sisters can compile by
contributing a text (focus on different sisters’ issues and advices).

Action list website:

- Who wants to be an event reporter?
Surf online and once a week email a short list with useful events to info@sistersproject.co.uk
- Who wants to be a general reporter for the website?
For example look online/ word of mouth about interesting projects in Birmingham and email these to
info@sistersproject.co.uk
- Who wants to be a blogger?
Look up/write articles/ texts for the blog bit and email them to info@sistersproject.co.uk
(at least 1 article/text every two weeks)?

Our skills; Our own place

How to match offer
& demand?
On the MY DEAR SISTER event the 11th of
October around 70 sisters already filled in their
skills on the skills forms. And every day sisters are
submitting their skills through the website.
Now is the question: how do we match these skills
with the demand?
An idea we came up with; put categories of skills
on the website, so sisters who are in need of one
of these categories can email for example: I am in
need of a sister with these type of skills.
Next to the website it is still important to have our
own place because not everybody has access to the
internet. So there should be an interaction between
a place/ building and the website.
Action list own place:
- Who knows of a building/community centre we
can start using for example for once or twice a
week?
(if we are eg. with ten sisters it would already be
enough to contribute one hour per sister)
If you know of any suitable place,
email to info@sistersproject.co.uk, it has to be
for free though as we don’t have funding!

Action list skills: Action list publicity:

- How else can we work with the skills sisters
leave behind?
(if you have tips or advice, email us!)
Another idea is trading skills/ swapping.
Eg. I can fill in your forms, can you help me
ironing.
- Who has an idea of making the SISTER’S
PROJECT known by as many sisters as possible
in Birmingham?
Please email any ideas
(forums, websites, ways of communicating, leaflet,
etc) to info@sistersproject.co.uk

-Who likes to look into setting up a ‘trading

skills’ project for sisters like this?
(if you have any ideas on this topic email
to info@sistersproject.co.uk) 4
Useful projects
We discussed useful projects which are in need where we can contribute to in our own way, even from
the comfort of our own homes.

- http://www.hhugs.org.uk/ (serves the needs of families of victims of British anti terror act, are im-
mediately in need of any funds, donations). Urgent: as the HHUGS families are in need, it might be an
idea to organize a fundraiser together.
- http://www.cageprisoners.com/ (the organizations for Muslim captives around the world)

Action list project HHUGS:

Who would like to be involved in organizing an original and unique sisters’ fundraiser and who has
ideas on what to do?
We already have sisters who are willing to cook etc.
If you are willing to participate in this please email us on info@sistersproject.co.uk

Dear sister,
Please look again at the action points above and see what you
would like to do.

Email whatever (small) you would like to do/support/initiate/advice

to: info@sistersproject.co.uk.
If you would like to attend the next sisterhood meeting sign up at:
http://www.sistersproject.co.uk/?menu=events

Let’s start in building up a group which can really be of value to

our local Ummah!
5
 Over time things change, but never the heart,
can’t seem to move on, still torn apart.

Offers to marry, someone to take care of the two,

I’ll never be a good wife, to none other than you.

Poem:
I still cry at night, when the babies lay rest,
Allah has definitely put me to the test.

Heard your face was bright, filled with light

I wish I could’ve seen you
on that crazy night.

Over
To see for myself, what I pray is true,
a beautiful man seeing his life anew.

She asks for you, out of the blue

What can I say? but that we will see him soon,
“daddy’s taking too long”

T ime
I tell her look at the moon.

Allah made that, and you and me,

he took daddy, just let things be.
One day soon you will see,

Things
another time, another place,
and then we’ll be free.

Don’t be sad loving, Daddy’s here

I point to her heart
and tell her don’t fear.

We are all still in pain

I just sit starring at the rain.

What do I say and what do I do,

I keep trying to figure things out,
Change
but I’m always blue.

Grateful for Alllah, that He is in our lives,

without Him I know I would never be able to
survive.

Pain and tears,

but hope for Bliss
even still,
it’s you I miss.

- By the wife of a Shaheed - 6

YOUR Many sisters have already filled in the skills form
on our website www.sistersproject.co.uk and our
database is increasing every day.
Here are some examples of SKILLS of sisters:

skills
in YOUR
ce
a n d guidan ,
Advis e lling
i on c ounse Helping
solu t s,
t i on a l issue up etc.
the sick,
or new b
educa hoices. Set aby, eve

community
c ial Cooking nts
career nal and soc and help
in
tio who nee
recrea r sisters. d the hel g older people
fo Helping p .
events pe
shopping ople who need h
o elp with
Organis r just in the hom
ing even e “help”
have chi ts w .
fe ldren, lik ith sisters who
l i n g, li evenings
.
e coffee m
ornings
se
d o coun sisters or or
h d
i can ing wit n abuse s do a
c h e a p lp in
coa have be . Perh eed he
d n
who epresse ers that om
f e el d or sist
f e g gs fr a
I ca p e
n grou rea. e rang ht be on
as I help a f re g
a m by t t hat r g a nic, who mi
wh ad rea o s
e nate to sister
and re in t octor. I ting si n d o
h c I ca hickens
Hel Islam e UK. drive e k peop c
our budget
p in ic st Tea ver le - Coo
soci
a
udi
es c h A
y-
rab t i g ht k
l ev
ent
.
ic - Cle
s. an
- Tal
k
p w ith (ente to people
hel with rtain
n ,
ur’a s, help I can drive, I can speak )
ch Q tie
Tea t activi . hinko and English.
s s.
sp o r a t i
hem eone’s
c g r a s
Cooking, filling in forms.
a t
m som Access to the ineternet.
Cut

Go to: http://www.sistersproject.co.uk/?menu=join_us
to fill in the skills form.
Or if you know someone who might need some help, or you
need help yourself, contact us at info@sistersproject.co.uk.
We will try to connect you with the right person from our
7
database.
Dilemma:
Pain & Pleasure
E
verything in this world is a mixture of pain and
pleasure. Nothing is pure. If it was total plea-
sure it was Paradise and it was total pain it was
Hellfire.
Think about your experiences in Paradise, in Jannah..
a combination of excitement, fun, pleasure, tranquil-
lity and peace. A combination of psychical and
psychological happiness.
And think about eternity...
imagine you ask whatever you want and whatever
wishes you have will be fulfilled. You’re going to enjoy
it for all of your life; it makes the enjoyment of this
world seem pale, doesn’t it? So dear sister, let’s get
back to our senses and wake up.
If you look in Jannah you will see pleasure and a
great Kingdom. In this world we experience pain, our
hearts are being broken, we are hurt, our bodies suf-
fer from illnesses, our patience is being tested and our
minds get exhausted. We wear the make-up of wives,
mothers, daughters and sisters, but our souls know
we do not belong here. And time is ticking away for our
end to come in this world and to make the transition
to the next.
That is what the world, the dunya is: a mask. As soon
as you pick up that layer you see how frail she is.
You can taste the enjoyment, but the real thing is in
Paradise. Even if there’s enjoyment in this world, it’s
only temporary. In this world, you can’t eat or drink
unlimited, in Jannah you could drink your whole river
if you want to.
Is there anybody that never ever in their life felt the
pain of fire? Almost every single one of us has ever
burnt herself. As if a reminder to all of us, Allah [swt]
makes us taste a fragrance of it.
How many reminders do we need until we start using
our time wisely? Thinking our chance in this world will
soon be gone and we will be in our graves with our
good deeds as our one and only companion?
The time is now to make our pain in this world trans-
form into pleasure in the next. To not let our problems
take us down, but transform them into energy and
willpower by helping each other and performing good
deeds. And thus, pave a way for yourself to that Great
Kingdom where no pain, no loneliness and no broken
hearts exist. No one else can do it for you, but you.
8

O
ne in four people will expe-
rience some kind of men-
tal health problem in the
course of a year. The most com-
mon being depression and anxiety.
Muslims are not exempt from these
statistics although many cases go
unreported. This may be due to a
number of factors, such as cultural
pressures, immigration status and
fear of discrimination to name a
few. In these cases it falls upon the
community to help.
As Muslims we believe that Allah
(swt) never puts a burden on us
greater than we can bear. Some-
times when faced with difficulties
or trauma this is easy to forget.
Sisters need to be there to remind
one another.
I was once told by a dear sister that
women need to say at least twen-
ty five thousand words a day, just
to feel satisfied. There are many
sisters who have no one to talk
to. They may not have a family, or
unsupportive one, they may be
lonely and isolated. It is hard to
combat low feelings and whispers
from the shaytaan if you feel as if
you are alone.
The Ummah has such a great
responsibility to ensure that all
Muslims are valued and cared
for. We have the most powerful
Do you want to share your story, article or tips? Then email us at: newsletter@sistersproject.co.uk
Muslims
And
Depression
weapon to fight negative thoughts
and feelings; dua. Just asking Allah
to help us is a reminder that this life
is transitional and temporary.
Other means are:
*Awareness – just being aware of
issues like mental health will make
you better equipped to see when
you or someone you know needs
support. Some signs of depression
can include:
- insomnia
- anxiety
- no self interest
- constantly crying
- reduced appetite/over eating
- panic attacks
- reduced personal hygiene
- small tasks seem overwhelming
- everyday tasks seen pointless
* Dhikr – Remembering Allah with
everything that we do.
Seeking Allah’s help with prayer and
patience. Allah will reward us
greatly if we persevere trough
times of hardship.
“Those who patiently persevere
will truly receive a reward with-
out measure” (Qur’an 39:10)
* Observe Sunnah and nafl fasts
husband permitting.
Fasting helps us to remember
Allah throughout the day and
strengthens our faith.
By: Umm Sebastian
* Sleep – getting adequate rest is
vital to help us cope with lifes trials.
Sleeping on your right hand side,
as recommended by the prophet
(saws) has been scientifically
proven to aid relaxation thus
achieving a better night’s sleep.
* Integration – this is very im-
portant but sometimes difficult for
sisters to do, especially if they
have recently converted and may
not know any sisters. We should
not be shy in approaching each
other, smiling can be the easiest
way to start a conversation, as is
giving salam. Mixing with other
Muslim women who are pious and
virtuous benefits us and can only
increase our reward and enrich our
understanding of Islam. Meeting
in a regular basis or even simpler
things like sending texts, emails or
letters are ways of letting others
know you care which can really lift
someone’s mood.
Ultimately we need to strengthen
the ties between sisters in Islam,
loving each other for the sake of
Allah. If we all strive to do this,
sisters would always have
someone to turn to when they feel
helpless. For Allah (swt) says:
“The believers are but a single
brotherhood…”( Qur’an 49:10)
9
THE
SMILEY
SISTERS
MINI
PROJECT
By: Umm Sebastian

I
used to live in Reading and when I just converted to Islam I was so excited that I wanted to
let all the Muslim women out there know I had accepted Islam. I said salam to every sister
I saw but was very disheartened by the response, or lack of one.

Since moving to Birmingham where there are, Alhamdulilah, thousands of Muslims the
problem is no better and you could argue worse. I am planning insha’Allah to convince the
sisters to smile more and spread salam.

“When a greeting is offered to you, meet it with a greeting still more curteous or at least of
equal courtesy” (Qur’an 4:86)

I have written a rhyme, and I will be ‘attempting’ insha’Allah to make key rings with this rhyme
on to give to the sisters to hand out to the Muslim community in Birmingham (or anywhere).

“If you see a sister, walking down the street,

take the time to give salam to everyone you meet,
it only takes a second,
just a smile will do,
imagine the reward,
Allah will give to you!”

Do you want to help out with this project email to: info@sistersproject.co.uk
Do you want to share and get support for your own idea/mini project?
Then email us at: newsletter@sistersproject.co.uk
10

The Prophet (peace and
blessings be upon him) said:
“When I entered the Paradise, I
heard someone’s footsteps - It was
explained to me that she was
Ghumiysa’ bint Milhan.”
The story of:
Umm Sulaym
bint Milhan
Al-Ansariyyah
A mong the great Muslim
women who are known for
their strength of character, lofty
aspirations and far-sightedness in
their choice of a husband is Umm
Sulaym bint Milhan, who was one
of the first Ansar women to embrace
Islam.She was married to Malik ibn
Nadar, and bore him a son, Anas.
When she embraced Islam, her
husband Malik was angry with her,
and left her, but she persisted in
her Islam. Shortly afterwards, she
heard the news of his death, and she
was still in the flower of her youth.
She bore it all with the hope of
reward, for the sake of Allah (SWT),
and devoted herself to taking care
of her ten-year-old son Anas. She
took him to the Prophet saw, so that
he could serve him. This was the
greatest gift any mother could have
given as he spent ten years in the
household of Rusul Allah saw.
One of the best young men of
Madinah, one of the best-looking,
richest and strongest, came to seek
her hand in marriage. This was
Abu Talhah – before he became
Muslim. Many of the young
women of Yathrib liked him
because of his wealth, strength
and youthful good looks, and he
thought that Umm Sulaym would
joyfully rush to accept his offer.
But to his astonishment, she told
him, “O Abu Talhah, do you not
know that your god whom you wor-
ship is just a tree that grew in the
ground and was carved into shape
by the slave of Banu so-and-so.”
He said, “Of course.” She said, “Do
you not feel ashamed to prostrate
yourself to a piece of wood that
grew in the ground and was carved
by the slave of Banu so-and-so?”
Abu Talhah was stubborn, and
hinted to her of an expen-
sive dowry and luxurious life-
style, but she persisted in her
point of view, and told him
frankly: “O Abu Talhah, a man like
you could not be turned away, but
you are a disbelieving man, and
I am a Muslim woman. It is not
permitted for me to marry you, but
if you were to embrace Islam, that
would be my dowry (mahr), and I
would ask you for nothing more.”
[Reported by al-Nisa’i with a sahih
isnad, 6/114, Kitab al-nikah, bab
al-tazwij ‘ala’l-Islam.]
He returned the following day
to try to tempt her with a larger
dowry and more generous gift, but
she stood firm, and her persistance
and maturity only enhanced her
beauty in his eyes. She said to him,
“O Abu Talhah, do you not know
that your god whom you worship
was carved by the carpenter slave
of so-and-so? If you were to set it
alight, it would burn.” Her words
came as a shock to Abu Talhah, and
he asked himself, Does the Lord
burn? Then he uttered the words:
“Ashhadu an la ilaha ill-Allah
wa ashhadu anna Muhammadan
rasul-Allah.”
Then Umm Sulaym said to her
son Anas, with joy flooding her
entire being, “O Anas, marry me
to Abu Talhah.” So Anas brought
witnesses and the marriage was
solemnized. Abu Talhah was so
happy that he was determined to
put all his wealth at Umm Sulaym’s
disposal, but hers was the attitude
of the selfless, proud, sincere
11
believing woman. She told him,
“O Abu Talhah, I married you for
the sake of Allah (SWT), and I
will not take any other dowry.”
She knew that when Abu Talhah
embraced Islam, she did not only
win herself a worthy husband,
but she also earned a reward from
Allah (SWT) that was better than
owning red camels (the most
highly-prized kind) in this world,
as she had heard the Prophet saw
say:
“If Allah (SWT) were to guide one
person to Islam through you, it
is better for you than owning red
camels.”
[Fath al-Bari, 7/476, Kitab al-
maghazi, bab ghazwat Khaybar.]
Umm Sulaym was pleased and
delighted with her new husband
who placed his unique energies and
talents in the service of Islam.
He was one of the seventy three
men who swore allegiance to the
Prophet at the second Pledge of
Aqabah. With him, according to
one report, was his wife Umm
Sulaym. Two other women, the
celebrated Nusaybah bint Kab and
Asma bint Amr witnessed Aqabah
and took the oath of allegiance to
the Prophet.
They were blessed with a son,
Umayr, but he fell ill and passed
away in young age whilst Abu
Talhah was travelling, and her
attitude was so unique that if Imam
Muslim had not reported this story
we would have taken it to be a mere
myth.Umm Sulaym told her family,
`Do not tell Abu Talhah about his
son until I tell him.’ Abu Talhah
came home, so she prepared dinner
for him, and he ate and drank. Then
she beautified herself in a way
that she had never done before,
then they were intimate together.
Later when he was rested, she said,
`O Abu Talhah, do you think that if
a people lent something to a house-
hold, then asked for it back, do they
have the right not to return it?’ He
said, `No.’ She said, `Then resign
yourself to the death of your son.’
Abu Talhah became angry and said,
`You let me indulge myself and
then you tell me about my son!’ He
went to the Messenger of Allah saw
and told him what had happened.
The Messenger of Allah saw said,
`May Allah bless both of you for
this night!’
Allah swt did indeed reward
her patience and Umm Sulaym
became pregnant. The Messenger of
Allah saw went on a journey, and
she accompanied him. When
the travelling-party approached
Madinah, her labour-pains started.
Abu Talhah stayed with her, and
the Messenger of Allah saw went
on ahead to Madinah.
Abu Talhah said, `O Lord, You
know how I love to go out with
Your Messenger when he goes out,
and to come back with him when
he comes back, and I have been
detained, as You see.’ Umm
Sulaym said, `O Abu Talhah, I do
not feel as much pain as I did before,
so let us go on.’ When they reached
Madinah, her labour-pains started
again, and she gave birth to a boy.
Anas reports, ‘My mother said
to me, `O Anas, nobody should
feed him until you take him to the
Messenger of Allah in the morn-
ing.’ So when morning came,
I took the baby to the Messenger of
Allah saw, and when I met him he
was carrying an iron tool. When he
saw me, he said, `I hope that Umm
Sulaym has given birth.’ I said,
`Yes.’ So he put down the tool and I
brought the child to him and placed
him in his lap.
The Messenger of Allah saw called
for some of the dates of Madinah.
He chewed it until it became soft,
then he put it in the baby’s mouth
and the baby began to smack his
lips. The Messenger of Allah saw
said: `See how much the Ansar love
dates!’ Then he wiped the baby’s
face and named him `Ab dullah.”
Sahih Muslim, 16/11,
How great was Umm Sulaym’s
faith, and how magnificent her pa-
tience and virtue! How bravely she
hid her pain from her husband and
endeared herself to him.
She managed to conceal her grief
at the loss of her beloved son and
spent that time with her husband
patiently hoping that by being
a good wife to her husband she
might earn the pleasure of Allah
(SWT). Abdullah went on to have
nine sons of his own, all of who
were hafiz. Such is the blessing of a
pious and virtous mother,
May Allah swt bless us with the
tawfiq and patience to be like the
women of the best generation.
12
Project to T
here are significant numbers of Muslims
in the UK who have special needs. And
while many have access to the national
curriculum, very few have access to any sort of
Islamic education.

SUPPORT:
Baseera is the UK’s first institute dedicated to the
Islamic education and well being of Muslims with
special needs. We recognise that people with special
needs play an integral role in society.

BASEERA
The Prophet’s (peace be upon him) companion
Abdullah Ibn Umm Maktum (may Allah be pleased
with him) is a famous example of how the Prophet
educated, nurtured, and elevated a Muslim who was
born blind. The Prophet sought Abdullah’s council,
appointed him to many important tasks, and gave
him a high rank among his companions. Abdullah
Ibn Umm Maktum was partially responsible for
calling people to prayer in Medina, and was
appointed the leader of Medina during the Prophet’s
absence on more than ten occasions.

Our Aims
* To establish and maintain a national network
of specially trained teachers and volunteers to
support Muslims who suffer from blindness and
other special needs.

* To identify problems and difficulties faced by

Muslims with disabilities and special needs.

* To ensure all Muslims with disabilities and

special needs have easy access to Islamic
education and services.

* To provide guidance and advise to masjids on

how to cater for Muslims with special needs.

* To train imams and teachers to understand the

needs and difficulties faced by Muslims with
special needs.

* To hold regular workshops nationally to

ensure high levels of service are maintained in
line with needs.

Also visit: http://www.youtube.com/

watch?v=OA5oLMH2zzg
13
T he SISTER’S PROJECT aims to be a With your contribution of ideas, needs, skills and
practical and caring sisterhood network to practical solutions we can now set off a network

support each other for women in Birming-
ham. Using our compassion, our openness and
all our personal skills, we can build a group to
help each other in our daily lives and make a
HOW
of sisters, to provide for each others’ needs.
Sisterhood Meeting
If you would like to attend the next sisterhood

TO
change in our area. meeting sign up at:
http://www.sistersproject.co.uk/?menu=events
If you would like to be part of this, go to
www.sistersproject.co.uk. Contribute to the next newsletter?

If you have any questions or if you know any
sisters or projects in need of support, don’t
hesitate to email to: info@sistersproject.co.uk
JOIN
If you would like to contribute to the next
edition of the newsletter, send your idea on a
topic, motivational story, dilemma, interesting
project or activity or any other beneficial updates
on sisterhood in Birmingham to:
newsletter@sistersproject.co.uk.

ALSO TAKE A LOOK AT:

One Imagine…one hour every week you do
something for somebody else. It doesn’t cost
you money. Only one hour of your time. An

hour
hour you can plan ahead each week. An hour
that will make you feel good inside. Because
you see the effect it brings about. An hour of

a week
reward. But.. where to start?

Find out more on:

project
www.onehouraweekproject.co.uk

THE MUSLIM DIARY

In these times of hastening and being busy, of ‘no time’ and ‘o, I forgot,’ we want to
give ourselves a guide to help us in our worship through each day.

The Muslim Diary contains a practical list on which you can mark the acts of worship
and good deeds you did that day. The list is a selection of the most recommended
acts of ‘ibadah [worship] in a schedule with all week days. All the deeds are being
explained in an easy but powerful way through Qur’anic verses and Ahadith.

You can get your MUSLIM DIARY from:

Maktabah.net: http://www.maktabah.net/
IPCI - Islamic Vision: 434 Coventry Road, Small Heath, Birmingham
Amsons: 353 & 355 Coventry Road, Small Heath, Birmingham

14
www.themuslimdiary.com