By Mystery Jealousy Plotlines 175 TP.BZ Special edited by epic2sk8 Grounding 179 Mid-Game and End-Game 185 The Seven Hour Rule 185 Kissing 187 The Ultimate Purpose of Life 1 The C2 Location 190 The Penultimate Purpose of Life 2 The Bounce 191 Your Purpose in this Life 3 The Time Bridge 192 Dynamic Social Homeostasis 9 Phone Game 195 A Biological Machine 1 0 Dating 197 Survival and Replication Value 11 The C3 Location 200 Alignment 11 The Sex Location 201 Pair Bonding 12 Moving from C3 to SI 202 Rejection and Approach Anxiety 13 S2: Last-Minute Resistance 203 Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs 14 S3: Sex 205 Social Status and Behavioral Circuitry 21 Waypoints 206 Women select for survival and replication Sticking Points 206 value 22 Identity 24 Image 24 Peacocking 25 The Ultimate Purpose of Life SURVIVE Creatures of Sentiment 26 Social Awareness 27 Intuition over Analysis 29 Without survival, there is no life. All life on Earth has been designed Congruence Tests 30 by evolutionary processes to replicate. This is nature's long- Investment 31 established engine of survival. Discomfort and Confrontation 32 Fun and Stimulation 32 Women are Dangerous Creatures 33 Rating Women 33 The Penultimate Purpose of Life - REPLICATE Cat Theory 34 Boyfriends 35 Structure and the Game 37 While the primary purpose of your life is to survive your secondary The Game is played in the Field 37 The Mystery Method Newbie Drill 3S purpos e is to replicate.In humans,natural selection has favored a Calibration and Internalization 3S method of replication which allows for genetic variation. Just as Process over Outcome 39 a superior basketball player limited by lousy team-mates must The Sexual Relationship 40 escape and join a better team if he is to win,so too mus t a superior Courtship 41 gene escape from its inferior gene-mates and be given a chance Attraction 42 to join a better genetic team for its continued survivallThis The M3 Model 48 The Four M3 Sequencing Mistakes 50 method of escape is called crossbreeding.Over successive Gaming Locations 63 Location Changes 64 generations, crossbreeding has allowed you that is,your The Nine Phases of the M3 Model 65 genesto anticipate changes in a dynamic physical and social Putting It All Together 67 environment,thereby increasing your chances for survival.Put A1: The Approach 69 simply, replication is a means of continued survival The Meeting Location 69 Your Purpose in this Life :Survive&Replicate!You are a biological Proximity 71 machine.Your motives in this life are simple, but no t simplistic: To The 3-Second Rule 72 live and love.In order to successfully crossbreed,you must Social Proof 73 Tips in the Venue 74 acknowledge that,without revolutionarytechnological advancements The Protection Shield 75 ,you will some day die. Canned Material 77 Question :Without calculating,just by feeling,how many DAYS do Proper Delivery of Material 78 you feel the average American ives?(A)Tens of thousands of days? Opinion Openers 79 (B) Hundreds of thousands of days?(C) Millions of days?(D) Billions False Time Constraints 86 of days? Answer :(A) Tens of thousands of days. How to Open Seated Sets 87 In fact, it is only 28,251. How to Open Moving Sets 89 What most people do wrong when approaching 90 You have,on average,28,251-daysto live out your life.This assumes A2: Female-to-Male Interest 93 you are smart enough to survive this long. Even if you live to be a Indicators of Interest (IOIs) 93 hundred , that is still only 36,500 days. Neg Theory 97 The universe requires only two things from you:that you survive Demonstration of Higher Value (DHV)104 and replicate.You r challenge is to do so before your limited life- Group Theory 105 span naturally expires.The most logical course of actio n is simple: Multiple Conversational Threads 107 Acknowledge the need to accelerate the learning curve through Winging 112 Storytelling 115 disciplined focus. Locking-In 119 Obtain useful survival and replication strategies from others . Role-Playing 121 Through practice and training, internalize this knowledge into False Disqualifiers 121 our automated motor response for practical real-life application. Various Group Scenarios 124 According to the National Center for Health Statistics in 2002. Pawning 127 There are many ways to help you survive.One such way i to learn A3: Male-to-Female Interest 131 the martial arts.There are also many ways to help you replicate. Frame Control 132 Hoop Theory 134 One such way is to learn the venusian arts . Role-Reversal 136 The Martial Arts(The Ar t of War) is the art of self-defense.It is a Having Standards 138 discipline which aids survival. MARTIAL:[Roman god of war] Of, Screening 139 relating to, or suited for war or a warrior.The Venusian Arts(The Art Intermittence 140 of Love) is the art of successfully beginning an ultimate relationship Kino Escalation 141 with another person whom you have not previously met.It is a Takeaways 145 discipline which aids replication. Compliance 146 Token Resistance 151 There is more to winning a fight than simply punching first,and as Qualifiers 152 any martial artist knows,the stronger man does not always win. Compliments 153 Preparation and training can mean the differencebetween surviving Bait - Hook - Reel - Release 154 and dying.Similarly there is more to successfully beginning a sexual C1: Comfort and Conversation 159 relationship than simply being good looking enough. A good game The Freeze-Out 160 plan expertly executed can mean the difference between replicating Comfort Building Locations 162 The Five Location Types for Gaming 164 and having your genes unapologetically weeded out of existence. The C1 Location 165 Moving to CI 166 The martial arts and the venusian arts possess many parallels. Conversational Rapport 168 Both are disciplines in dynamic social interaction,and each is for Commonality 171 many,a way of life. Conspiracy 172 Both rank proficiency;colored belts for martial artists and colored People tend t o form social alignments with one another,wherever charms hung on black cords for venusian artists. such alignments benefit their chances of survival and replication. Each also embodies a comprehensive mental element which is For example,a primitive tribe is a form of social alignment.Those expressed through physicality. within the tribe have improved chances of survival they wouldn' t However,in the martial arts it is sometimes best to not engage in a normally have if they were alone.Another example of alignment is a given social interaction.In the venusian arts,the only way tosucceed modern-day celebrity entourage.Entourage members enjoy is to have one.Bruce Lee's fighting style Jeet Kune Do (Way of the increased access to sex.Even though the entourage member is not Intercepting Fist) is a martial arts style. Similarly,Mystery's MM a celebrity,he has still improved his survival and replication value (Th e Mystery Method ) is a venusian arts style.Bruc e Lee was a through his association with the celebrity. legendary martial artist.Yet his life's accomplishment is reveal that Pair Bonding being a martial artist was only one-half of a greater whole. It's no A pair bond is an emotional bond associated with a sexual secret Bruce also identified with other socially rewarding alignment;beginning prior to pregnancy and continuing up through pursuits.He was a great actor and a celebrity.He was a great leader child-rearing. (From any evolutionary perspectiveand thus from and role-model.He was a great teacher and a great father.He was an emotional perspectivepregnancy and pair bonding are the defined by more than a martial artist. Defined by his more social same thing,since effective birth control has only recently been roles,he was also a venusian artist... and a good one. invented)Pair bonding has been described as a compromise Like Bruce Lee,all people live under constant pressure to balance between the competing sexual strategies of the man and the between protecting themselves from others and aligning Woman. Also known as a "romance,it occasionally lasts a lifetime, themselves with others.This balance is called dynamic social though in our modern society most pair bonds average only several homeostasis. years or months 111 length- Dynamic Social Homeostasis It is worth noting that,from an emotional perspective,the woman There would be no replication if men or women over-protected places her survival itself in great danger by having sex. themselves by never leaving their homes.Yet there would also be Evolutionarily speaking,if a man impregnates her,she is dependent no need for the venusian arts if men or women remained upon her pair bond with him to protect her and provide for her completely naive and did not worry about protecting themselves during this vulnerable time. If he is not pair bonded with her,he is and their loved ones when they met new people. You can neither likely to move on and she will not have access to his resources. have too much no r too little of either.If you do not have dynamic Worse,her reputation as a "slut " will also lower her status within social homeostasis, you compromise your probabilities of her social network,further jeopardizing her survival and replication successfully surviving or replicating.Your mind has been designed prospects.The man faces no such physical or social repercussions by natural selection to powerfully emote in ways that contribute to for engaging in sex, an thus men often do it quite both your survival and replication.Your emotions carry out an indiscriminately.Sex represents a much great risk to a woman than evolutionarily stable strategy that aims to keep you in dynamic it does to a man.Sex also represents a much larger investment for social homeostasis. a woman than it does for a man.Her reproductive years are fewer A Biological Machine than his and her time spent producing each child is much greater You are a biological machine.While unimaginably sophisticated,you as wellten minutes of sex for him,nine months of pregnancy for are however literally an out-of-dat e model.Nature has simply not her.The result of this is that women are considerably choosier than designed you for the world in which you currently live.This is men,and it is also much more important to a woman that a pair because the world,as it is today,has never existed before.Certainly bond exists before she will engage in sex. For this reason,due to our physical environment has changed little over the past natural selection,women often experience anxiety just before 100,000 years. Trees,sky and rain remain the same.It is our social having sex the first time with a new lover.It's not her fault environment that has undergone a dramatic chang. We live in the this last-minute resistance is a pre-programmed emotional midst of an unprecedented population explosion.Never in Earth' s response.He emotions are only trying to do what' s best for her. history have there been so many similarly designed human Rejection and Approach Anxiety machines existing at any one time.As of writing there are an Logically,rejection causes us no harm.But emotionally,rejection can estimated 6.45 billion people living on our planet today.It is be a punishing experience.To understand this,we must look at the predicted that in only thirty years there will be close to 10 billion ancient environment for which we were designed.In a tribal group, people. there will be some small number of available women of breeding When Mystery was born in the 1970's there were 4 billion people age.When a man approaches one,he risks rejection,and if that living on the planet.Around the time of Casanova in the mid happens,all the other women will know,which will diminish his value 1700's, there were only 750 million people.10,000 years ago,there in their eyesmaybe to the point where none of the women will were only 30 million people.Looking further back in time to around mate with him.This is called preselectionwomen look for social 120,000 years ago, there were only 10,000 to 40,000 humans validation of their choices.A suitor who is preselected will be more living on the planet.Our struggle for survival and replication comes attractive,whereas a man who has been rejected will be less so. from a dynamically changing social environment. Ever since Another factor regarding approach anxiety is the possibility that humanity came into existence,we have been faced with the she may already be taken,in which case there is a component of challenge of trying to keep up with and adapt to a constant real,physical danger to any male who approaches her.For all these increase in our population.Life in a small town is very different than reasons and more,men are naturally selected to experience life in a big city.Consider the differences between living your entire approach anxiety.Logically,of course,modern society fixes these life in a small tribe of fifty to sixty people,and living in a city of problems.If I am rejected, I can simply go to another part of the twelve million.Nature has not yet had a chance to adapt you r bar,or leave the bar entirely.I will probably never see any of those design to the new social environment. people again.But my emotions don't know that.My emotions are Life's adaptation is always lag behind changes in the environment. trying to do what's best for me . First the environment changes,and only then can humanity slowly So how can you avoid rejection? adapt to those changes.Your bodyand more importantly to your The answer is:you can't.It isn't the solution to avoid being replicationyour emotional circuitry,has not yet had the chance to vulnerable. Rather, the solution is to embrace your vulnerability, to adapt to today's social environment and the new challenges it embrace rejection,and let the Field show you what is good and brings.You are an out-dated machine,a prisoner in time, designed what is bad.Most approach anxiety is a result of imagined for an ancient environment which no longer exists.You are instead rejections,not real ones.Eventually,time in the Field will desensitize best adapted for an ancient environment and tribal social order you to the emotion of rejection.In a game where you might play that onc e existed sometime between 40,000 and 60,000 years five or ten sets every night,losing a few of them here and there ago. never really seems like a big deal.And remember, if you don't make Survival and Replication Value it happen, Nature will unapologetically weed your genes out of People are designed to select in favor of higher survival and existence. replication value.When a woman observes two men,her circuitry Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs will quickly assess the survival value and replication value of each Bound by the human condition,you have a hierarchy of needs and man. She will then emotionally perceive the result of this everything you do is directly or indirectly a result of emotions that calculation.She will naturally be attracted to the man with the do nothing less than demand you meet them: Self-Actualization, highest value.The healthiest man,the most intelligent man,the most Esteem,lov e,Safety and .Physiological(top to bottom). socially-connected man,the most financially independent man,the Established by psychologist Abraham Maslow,this theory states that most sexually preselected manthese sorts of traits will attract human beings are motivated by unsatisfied needs,and that certain the woman because such a man provides survival and replication lower needs must be satisfied before higher needs can be.For value to her,as well as to her offspring. example, if you were choking right now, the need to breathe would Alignment be stronger than your need to be loved.Let's face it;you won't care if nobody loves you.Physiological:These needs include very basic you must pass on your genes.The average person lives for just needs such as air,water, food, warmth, sleep, and sex.Safety: 28.251 days. The logical course of action is to determine the These needs have to do with establishing stability and consistency most effective way to survive and replicate, and practice this until it in a chaotic world and are mostly psychological in nature.Love: becomes an automatic response.The Martial Arts consist of People desire to be loved and accepted by others.We need to practiced routines that, once internalized, improve your survival belong. Esteem: There are two types.Self-esteem results from chances. The Venusian Arts consist of practiced routines that, competence or mastery of a task,while attention,recognition and once internalized, improve your replication chances.Dynamic social status comes from others.Self-Actualization:We desire to Social Homeostasis is the balance between the drive to protect become everything that we are capable of becoming. People who ourselves from others and the drive to align ourselves with others. have all lower needs met can maximize their potential. Our emotional circuitry is designed to best suit our survival and More information on Maslow's hierarchy of needs may be found replication needs, based on an ancient environment and tribal online. social order that once existed tens of thousands of years ago. To meet every need on Maslows hierarchy of needs and satisfy the People make sexual decisions largely based on this emotional function of your highly evolved emotional system, thereby fulfilling circuitry.People tend to form social alignments with one your purpose in life,there are three vital areas you must focus on. another,wherever such alignments most benefit their chances of Every time you have marked success in any of these areas, you survival and replication.A pair bond is an emotional bond mind rewards you with a feeling of happiness. associated with a sexual alignment, beginning poor to pregnancy Vital Areas of Focus and continuing up through child rearing several years Health Wealth Love later.Women take a much larger risk, evolutionarily speaking, This simple model is as old as the Kabbalah,and success in the when they have sex. Sex is also a much larger investment for them three areas of health,wealth, and love will ensure your survival and than it is for men. For thus reason, women have emotional replication.Health:Health refers to both the physical and the mental circuitry designed to take this into account. For example, women body and mind.You need a proven method or game-plan to tend to experience much more anxiety just prior to sex with a maintain your health.Wealth:Wealth helps you to maintain your new lover.Men take a larger risk than women when first health and your relationships.You need a roof over your head, approaching. In ancient times, this posed a legitimate safety clothes on your back and food in your stomach.Additional creature concern and thus men still experience approach comforts assist in your survival and replication.An apartment may anxiety.Women tend to look for social validation of their choices. keep you warm and dry,but also provides a private location for For example, a woman will find a man more attractive if he has sex. A vehicle not only enables you to make money,but also already been preselected by other women.Bound by the human improves your romantic options by increasing your effective range. condition, everyone has a hierarchy of needs that must be met, You need a proven wealth building game-plan to have financial including physiological needs, safety needs, social needs, and so independence and to fund your game for romantic pursuits. It also on.Our emotions are designed to motivate us to get these needs costs money to have a gym membership,dress well, and socialize at met.There are three vital areas of life we must focus on: Health, a nightclub or restaurant.LOVE(Relationships):This refers mainly to Wealth, and Love. Deficiencies in any one of these categories will your loving relationships,but may also extend to friendships,family cause problems to surface in the other two. members and business relationships.If you want to have loving Chapter 2 - Social Status and Behavioral Circuitry relationship success, you must study relationships and in particular Emotions are circuits in the brain that judge value and create how to begin one.You may maintain an area,improve it or neglect it motivation.They are designed to keep you alive and to replicate If you rate your success in any area from 1 to 10, a 10 requires your genes.It is interesting to note that the various emotions don't you to only maintain it. If the rating is below 10, you will need to have to be in agreement with each other.You can be happy about devise a way to improve your success in that area. If you neglect something but simultaneously disappointed about it as well.You can an area too long then the quality of your life will decline. enjoy someone's company but also find them completely Each vital area of focus is bound to the two other areas in countless unattractive sexually.You can yearn for something but then be ways.Success in any one vital area will positively affect the other unhappy when you get it. It isn't necessary for these emotions two, while neglecting to maintain any one area will negatively affect (and the behavior they generate) to be logically consistent it is the other two.When you neglect an area for far too long the effects only necessary that they keep your genes alive. can quickly infect a second area.The second areas negative effects What do women want? Their various drives and motivations are can then cascade into a third area,and so on . This runaway chain often in conflict.She may desire a strong alpha man.But when she reaction is called spiraling and if left unbridled can undermine your acquires one, she may set about turning him into a beta male bit- life's prime directives. Rationing your time equally among all three by-bit,as a natural nesting instinct.If she succeeds and he is tamed, vital areas is crucial in preventing a downward spiral which can lead then she will feel reassured in her feminine power but to a great collapse (sickness, poverty and loneliness).Sometimes,to simultaneously she will find him less attractive as a result.Can she improve in a certain area you must first focus on and improve ever truly be happy?It doesn't matter.In the grand scheme of another area.For example,you can increase your success in love things, her emotions don' t have to keep her happy. All they have by maintaining or improving you r health or your wealth.Healthy to do is keep her alive.(And get her pair bonded and pregnant with wealthy and love share an intimat e relationship with each other . the right man.)It's true that sometimes it can be frustrating that Health Neglect:If you have wealth and success in love her behavior is governed by her emotions. But there is power to (relationships) but are lacking in health(mental or physical), be had because of this.Through experimentation,we can discover you'll have decreased success in the area of wealth with lowered the mechanisms behind her behavior and through practice we can productivity and energy levels,as well as in the area of consistently control them.Practicing the game is not unlike the relationships.People who don't respect themselves are seldom movie Groundhog Day,where Bill Murray re-lives the same day over respected by others.Unhealthy people are simply not attractive. and over again for what seems like years. Each day he tries to pick Wealth Neglect: If you have health and relationship success (love), up the same girl, and her responses are different as he tries new but fail in the area of wealthy you won' t have the resources to tactics from day to day.Over time his skills improve and he gets pursue love(unable to pay cover charges for instance) nor have the closer and closer to his goal.If the right switches are flipped, she means to maintain health(proper food,healthy physicalenvironment will feel attraction and she won' t really have a choice abou t this. and exercise equipment).A big bed in your own condo not only Similarly,if the wrong switches are flipped, she will lose attraction allows you to sleep better than on your parent's couch(health), but and she won't have a choice about that either. She may even feel also rewards you with a place to bring a woman (love). disappointed that it happened.This means that her responses have Love(Relationship )Neglect:If you are healthy and wealthy,but you absolutely nothing to do with who you are as a person.It's not dont have success in your relationships,this failure will make you about who you areit's just a response generated by your tactic, feel lonely and compromise your self-esteem(mental health).It will your delivery and other factors. It' s just a game. So it is that in the also undermine your wealth building plans.For business game metaphor we completely separate our ego from the relationships, you'll have a tough time making new contacts , responses that we get. networking,and you'll appear less together which will affect your Often people can be unaware of the subtleties in their own wealth building potential . behavior that generate these responses.Sometimes by random You must maintain or improve all three vital areas of your life with chance, the right things happen,the right responses are generated, balance.If you aren't getting the results you want while practicing and even a chump gets laid. He says to himself,"I got lucky." How your game, it might be useful to examine your social life in general, right he is.Let's examine in mor e detail some of the motivations your health and fitness and your career. behind women' s behavior, and some of the ways we can take Chapter One Review advantage of this.Women selec t for survival and replication value The ultimate purpose of life is survival.The penultimate purpose So wha t are som e characteristics that convey S an d R value? of life is replication.Someday you will the. Before that time comes, Looks and height. All other factors being the same,women will would normally experience.It is a demonstration of higher value generally be more attracted to taller or better-looking men . when people perceive that you are accustomed to this social However, if you are shor t or ugly, that is absolutely no excuse to pressure and otherwise unaffected by it.(In other words,when feel sorry for yourself. Ther e are plenty of successful venusian people see that you are congruent with your image.) arists wh o aren't very tall or classically attractive. Looks and This congruence is the critical point. A man with a top hat and a height are real factors, and should be taken into account but feather boa, ith two women on his arms and surrounded by they aren't dealbreakers. laughing friends, looks like the man.Everyone in the room will Being healthy and in shape.Although it's possible to eat wrong , notice him and women will whisper to one another that they want avoid the gym and still pickup girls,men who stay fit are simply to be introduced to him.But the same man sitting by himself in the more attractive to women.This really has a big effect on results; corner could end up looking like a social reject. people who work out not only look better,but they also give off Try wearing at least one item that is cool and attention-getting. a better energy in social interactions. It may be used as a lock-in prop (chapter 5) as well as allow Th e Myster y Metho d wome n to make a comment , goo d o r bad, i f they wish t o Hygiene and grooming.These are essential.Stay clean and well- ope n o r sustain a conversation with you.Fo r example, on e groomed and keep your breath smelling fresh.Don't be a scrub. tiling she might do if yo u are talking to he r an d she senses Fashion sense. People who don't know how to dress are that the conversation is winding down , she may suddenly say, "O h completely oblivious to how bad their clothes look in the eyes of that's a cool necklace." This is her way of continuing the people who do know how to dress(most of whom are women.) interaction in a perfectly reasonable way, while reserving Dressing poorly also conveys a lack of social intelligence,which is some element of plausible deniability.O n mor e than on e occasion a demonstration of lower value.Anyone who isn't being regularly Mystery has ha d wome n walk u p t o hi m and tell hi m that they complimented on his clothes should get a fashion consultant to hate his goggles. He would reply, "No you don't, you're attracted to help fix this problem. me."This is wh y it's important that the pro p be genuinely Being comfortable.It's often stressed that on e should be cool. Otherwise she would look like a try-hard for commentin g confident.But the truth is that the most important state of mind in on it an d she'll lose th e courage to do so. (Incidentally you also pickup is one of comfort. Your body language should reflect this. look like a try-hard every time yo u tell a girl ho w cool her Relax and take up space in a comfortable way.Lean back an make necklace looks.) yourself at home . Smiling and having a sense of humor.Men who don't get laid Creatures of Sentiment usually don't smile.There are a lot of guys walking around who Logic and reason can be used to determine a course of action,but don't look happy. Be the guy who is having a good time and who often they are instead used to rationalize the action after the fact. makes other people feel good. Don' t take yourself to o seriously. This is true of both men and womenwe are motivated by our Not being needy.A typical man with high survival and replication emotions and then we backwards rationalize our actions.Emotions, value is probably doing fine with his finances.He probably has to women,are even much more profound and all-encompassing access to sex. He is probably comfortable in term s of his health than they are to men.Thus,they are also a more powerful and and physical needs. Thus , he is not a needy person. It's important consistent motivator.In fact,when a woman explains something, to convey this sense of abundance and to really feel it. When you she will often use emotions as legitimate reasons unto themselves. lust after an outcome , women will pick up on this and perceive Don't convince you as a low value guyand women are not programmed to have Don't bother trying to convince her,argue with her,or engage her in sex with desperate, low value guys. any other way on a logical level.Logic should never be used as a Being unaffected.In keeping with the above line of thought,don' t motivator in the field, because what a woman thinks she likes, or be reactive or try to impress people.The person trying to impress says she likes,is not necessarily what she responds to emotionally is perceived to be the one with lower status. Similarly,don' t and sexually. make excuses for yourself,and don't come across as someone Stimulate her emotions seeking a reaction,or seeking attention,validation or understanding. The venusian artist uses emotional stimulation instead of rational Having a life. Be ambitious and stay in shape. Have a strong discourse.As long as it feels right, your romantic interest will invent identity and purpose in your life.Have friends and tend to your her own reasons for what is happening. In other words, when you social circle. can give her the right feelings,her rationalization process starts to There are many other ways to convey valuethrough your game, work in your favor instead of against it.A woman knows how your body language, your pre-suppositions, your social interactions, susceptible she can be when she is in an emotional state.Often her and soon. Th e rest of this boo k will describe all of these tilings. solution to this is to avoid becoming emotionally engaged in an Identity interaction where she doesn't feel trust or safety,or where the man Who am I? gaming her doesn't seem to have enough S and R value.When this Such a complicated question but with a simple answer:You are happens she will seem non-responsive.Thus,if you can engage a what you convey.Think for a moment what your first choice of woman on an emotional level, even if it's a "bad"' emotion such as career would be if you had no chance of failure.In other words, are frustration or jealousy,this is much preferable to her remaining you really pursuing your dreams, or have you grown complacent:' non-responsive. Women are attracted to passionate,purposeful men.A quick perusal Also,instead of only trying to give her "good" emotions or avoid of womens personal ads will often reveal some combination of the "bad " emotions, stimulate her with a range of emotions such as phrasespassionate","ambitious","knows what he wants and knows curiosity, fascination, fear of loss, connection,indignation, validation how to get it".She doesn't really care so much what you are and devalidation,humor,embarrassment,happiness,sadness and so passionate about,just that you are passionate about something. on.The more she is stimulated,the more compelling the experience It's attractive.This is because,for whatever reason,women in will be for her. Chapter 5 describes various techniques for this. ancient times wh o successfully passed on their genes tended Social Awareness to be attracted to these sorts of men . Are you this sort of man ? The various aspects of social networking are of great interest to What if you were to choose an identity that carried the stereotype people and especially women including status,reputation, of being a leader of men, being pre-selected by women, or being competition and alignments and pair bonds . the supporter and protector of those close to your To whatever Discretion is a virtue degree you convey these characteristics,higher value is When she says,"not here," you say, "I understand."A woman's demonstrated thus triggering attraction. reputation directly influences her social status.This is why women Image are easier to get int o bed when they are on vacationthey are Is your image congruent with your identity? more likely to indulge in an adventure for which they trust there There is a big difference between dressing well,and dressing in a are no social consequences.This is also why women are way that is congruent to your identity.How does a rock star dress? appreciative of men who understand and practice discretion.A How does a basketball player dress?How do you dress?Does it venusian artist will never brag abou this sexual conquests.If you convey a distinct identity?What is the first impression that people do,not only will it eventually get back to her,but any other woman will have when they see you?Some of these questions are not who hears it will also be on notice that sexual relations with you easily answered, and in fact one should never stop asking them.The carry social consequences.So,for example,when you obtain a phone process is continual. number from a woman,don't walk straight over to your friends and Peacocking be seen high-fiving the m enthusiastically. Peacocking is the use of attention-getting clothes to amplify your Anti-Slut Defense responses in the field. If you are peacocked, girls will look at The word 'Slut' is a weapon that women use against other women. you more often, and guys will make sniggering comments.This Women have a powerful interruption mechanism known as anti-slut means that there will be more social pressure on you than you defense,or ASD.Not only does she prefer to avoid having others something that she is consciously aware of.She just gets a feeling perceive her as a slut,which would pose dire consequences to her to behave a certain way,and so she does. Based on how you react social status,but also she wants to avoid the discomfort of feeling to this, she then feels either more or less attracted as a result. This like a slut. Thus she has the ASD interrupt mechanism to help her is know n as a congruence test. avoid this fate. If she views you as a contender,then she will test you.A woman ASD is what makes a girl blurt out 'I have a boyfriend'(whether she often won't even bother to test losersinstead she'll just become actually does or not)Because you escalated faster than she was non-responsive and then leave as soon as she can.Thus,a test can comfortable with.Time in the field will eventually improve your be considered an indicator of interest, of sorts.Congruence tests are calibration to the point where you can escalate without activating a double-edged sword; if you respond the right way, she will be her ASD.Chapter 6 describes how to escalate smoothly through the noticeably more attracted to you after the test. But if you fail, then use of false disqualifiers. she will be noticeably less attracted. (Chapter 6 explains how to Plausible deniability maintain control of the frame and pass her tests.) She will never do anything during the pickup that makes her feel Appeasement is futile responsible for what is going down.To whatever degree she feels Women are like children in this respect. . .they have to know where responsible,her ASD will be activated.Thus she has a need for the boundaries are.They will keep pushing and testing until they plausible deniability.For example, if you were to say to her "Hey, find those boundaries.When a woman pushes and feels that let's go back to my place and have sex," she will have to say no , resistance,it allows her to feel secure with you.This is what she's even thoug h she wants to say yes, because saying yes would looking for.But if she doesn't feel that resistance, then she will keep make her responsible for whats happeningwhich she can never do. pushing until she walks all over you.Of course, she'll be unable to But if instead YOU were to say, "Hey, let's stop by my place on the respect a man if she can walk all over him.It'll be mildly way to that party I have to show you mv tropical fish." Well, she disappointing to her,but she'll also feel reassured about her now has an excuse and plausible deniability to stop by your place feminine powerwhich feels goodand she may even reward his and then oopsie hav e sex with you."One thing led to submission with positive reinforcement.Good doggy. another..." The moral is, just because she likes something doesn't mean it will This is why serendipity is so romantic.After all, if it was meant to bring you any closer to sex.A girl enjoys the ego boost when men be,then how can it be her fault? Who is she to deny Fate? cat-call at herbut she'll never have sex with those men . Act with moxie Moxie means inventive courage.The venusian artist must always Investment be leading the interaction to where he wants it to go.This is partly Although you may be an attractive guy with relatively high S and R due to the fact that he has no choice, since the woman won' t take value,another guy just like you could easily come along tomorrow. any responsibility for what is happening.For example,it is necessary In the moment,when she is intoxicated with the emotions of flirting to keep things interesting during the opening phase of the game. If with you and she gives you her phone number, she may have every yo u don' t make the conversation interesting, then she will raise intention of following up with you in the future.But once you are boring topicsand then she will feel bored and blame it on you. separated, memories slowly fade and new flirtations arise.Thus,it's It's not fair,right?This pattern of behavior can be maddening.But not enough for her to be attracted to you.She must become the truth is, if she feels bored around you but excited around other invested in her interaction with you.The more she is invested in her guys, then why should she waste her time on you? interaction with you,the more she will be motivated to get a return Make things happen.Take full responsibility for your shared on that investment.Thus,the more time she spends with you, the experience with her.It is your job to act with moxieto move from more money she spends on you,the more effort she exerts to get phase to phase,to meet the objectives of each phase,to escalate,to your attention or validation,the more she is emotionally and venue change and so on.The rest of this book will explain exactly physically engaged with you,the likelier it becomes that you will how to do these tilings. eventually begin a sexual relationship with her. Persistence What are some forms of investment? Persistence is another way to alleviate her of any responsibility for Emotional investment.Women are reluctant to allow themselves whats happening.Of course,don't confuse persistence with begging, to become emotionally vulnerable around men of dubious intent or arguing,or being pushy,needy, or creepy.All it means is,don't give low S and R value.A woman knows that once she gets emotional, up too easily.Girls will test you to find out how easily you give up it becomes much more difficult to extract herself from the situation. they want to see how confident you are in yourself.Just assume Physical investment.Kissing is a bigger investment than walking that she is giving a little token resistance and continue. arm-in-arm.Sex is the biggest investment of all. Token resistance Time-The more time you spend together,the more invested she Women will give token resistanceexpect it. If she didn't resist at becomes. It takes an average of four to ten hours before sex. least a little bit,she would feel like a slutand that's not going to Effort. Is she chasing?People don't value that which comes too happen.This can be trickyan overly aggressive man might easily.The more effort she puts in,the more invested she has misinterpret all resistance as being merely token resistance and become. could eventually find himself facing a rape charge. Whereas a man Money.Did you buy her a drink or did she buy one for you.Many who isn't persistent enough will acquiesce every time she resists, of the tactics in the game are not designed to attract her but rather when in many cases she was secretly hoping that he would be a to use that attraction as bait in order to get her more invested in little mor e forceful her interaction with you. (See chapter 6 for these tactics). Intuition over Analysis Discomfort and Confrontation Women follow their intuition,so believe your own bullshit.For Women tend to avoid discomfort and confrontation.This may seem example,if she wants to determine whether or not you are being rather common-sense,but these points are critical to achieving real with her,she won't logically analyze what you said for success in the game: inconsistency.Instead,she'll look to you to see if you seem Have a positive, open attitude. Don't be judgmental or jealous. congruent with what yo u are saying. (Are you?)Another example Don't act as if things are a big deal.They aren't. of female intuition:Women often look for the "real meaning " Don't complain or be emotionally punishing.If you call her on her behind what you say. For example,if you tell a story about your shit while talking on the phone,she will just avoid talking to you on "friend-" she will usually assume that you are actually talking about the phone.Instead of being the whiny or emotionally abusive yourself. This can be useful when the story demonstrates higher boyfriend whenever she pulls a fast one,be the guy who has plenty value.For example,if you don't want to look like a braggart,you of options. could say,"My friend hooked up with this amazing girl and they had If she flakes on you, don't confront her about it next time you see wild sex all weekend..."On the flipside,if you want her to believe her.Are you the guy who sat around and got upset?Or are you the that the story really is about someone else(like if it demonstrates guy wh o called over another girl and then forgot all abou t it? lower value) then use a specific name.For example,"My friend Craig Fun and Stimulation woke up last weekend with a condom in his ass and..."Shell assume Just as she tends to avoid discomfort,so she is also attracted to fun you really are talking about someone else if you give him a name. and stimulation.(Once her safety has been secured,of course.) Congruence Tests Attractive women are often found on boats or dance floorsin parties A woman's number one emotional priority is safety and security. or nice cars and around bad boys and rich men.These things are Above all,she wants a man who makes he feel safe and protected.It much more compelling than being a nice guy. would be convenient if she could simply ask each man in order to Be a fun and playful person.This is preferable to appearing tough determine whether or not he will be able to adequately support and or 'deep.' protect her and her offspring. But of course he would then lie in Be challenging to women.They love this. order to obtain sexso she must test.It's important to remember Be slightly unpredictable.Familiarity breeds contempt. that often she is not deliberately testing you.It's not necessarily Embrace your passions and be involved in activities(See chapter 7 proves that he actually exists only that she had a motive to for more info on building a strong identity.) mention him.Some reasons why women might say they have a Develop your social circle.Put time and energy into this.Keeping a boyfriend :1) She doesn' t have a boyfriend, she's just saying woman around is an active process. After you win her over,you that because she's not attracted t o you. can't just put her in a box and pull her out like a toy when you feel 2) She does have a boyfriend and given her current options , she like playing with her.She needs constant attention, stimulation,a has chosen to stick with that relationship. firm hand,and several trillion other things.She will never be 3) She does have a boyfriend, but she is willing to sleep with you: completely content, but it is possible to keep her coming back for and she just wants to make sure that you understand her more and get her "in love" with you. situation first. She wants discretion and understanding. And Women are Dangerous Creatures though she might be available to you for sex. she's not Women are not angels of purity and morality,fit for placing on a immediately available for any more of a commitment . pedestal.They are human just like the rest of us.Often in the field 4) She does hav e a boyfriend, she is willing to cheat on him (they you may notice women lying or using other manipulation.They may usually are if your game is tight), but she doesn't want to feel act jealous,try to make you jealous, se their sexuality to gain guilty about it. This is her rationalization process at work. As long power, stir up trouble,and often will not hesitate to ditch you for as she mentions the boyfriend before sleeping with you, she something shiniersomeone with more status, more testosterone, can rationalize to herself that it was "your fault." Sure, she more cocaine.And as empathetic as women are deemed to be,she might regret it later but that won't stop her from cheating. will not later wallow in pathos with a solitary tear on her cheek, full 5) She doesn't have a boyfriend, she is attracted to you; she just of regret for ditching you. Don' t take it personally;it's just part of doesn't wan t to look like a loser who can't ge t a man. Most the game. Incidentally,now would be a good time to admit that the hot women have orbiters anyway: nice guys who pose as her same is true of yourself. We are all human. friend but secretly want to sleep with her.Since the word Rating Women "boyfriend" can have so many different meanings, she is A woman's S and R value can be rated almost purely based on her thinking of one of her orbiters as a "place-keeper'" when she makes looks. That is a terible thing to say. But it's not denigration it's a this statement. statement of fact.Men are programmed to inseminate as many The bottom line is,don't ask about her boyfriend and don't be pretty women as possible.Thus a woman's sexual value to a man fazed if she mentions him. Just take it as a hint that u probably can be easily determined by her physical appearance. telegraphed too much interest too soon,and then continue gaming Men often employ a decimal rating system,ranging from 1 to 10, as normal. with a 7 being a cute girl and a 10 being a supermodel.It may seem Chapter Two Review uncout to refer to a woman as a number,such as a 5 or a 9. But the Emotions are circuits in the brain that judge value and create truth is that woman of different ratings do behave differently, to a motivation. They are designed to keep vou alive and to replicate great degree.And furthermore, men and women will also respond your genes. People seek alignments and pair bonds based on differently to other people based on perception of their relative survival and replication value.Part of being a man of value is difference in social status. This prejudice is a fundamental human pursuing your dreams,having a strong identity,and living a behaviorit's hardwired.Here is one example of responding based passionate life.Your image should congruently convey youridentity. on social status: Seeking rapport is often an easy way to open a Peacocking is the use of attention-getting clothes to amplify your conversation with a set of 5s, but will only get you blown out with responses in the field. Try wearing at least one item that is cool a set of 10s. Whereas being cocky and challenging, which 9s and and attracts attention. 10s absolutely love, will often cause a 4 or 5 to react in a nasty People are likely to act based on their emotions and then way. backwards rationalize.Because women are more emotional,they are The Mystery Method,with its emphasis on negs, group theory and especially susceptible to this.What a woman likes, or says she likes, preselection, is geared towards attracting 10s.In fact,you may have is not necessarily what she responds to emotionally(and thus to tone down these aspects of your game if you are dealing with sexually.)To get results with women, stimulate their emotions. a lesser-caliber woman ,otherwise she may reject you in order to They will follow their emotions and then backwards rationalize protect her own ego. It' s easier for her to take the immediate ego whatever happens.If a woman remains non-responsive, that boost of shooting down a guy, rather than risk being rejected by means she is deliberately cutting you off from gaming her. A on e whom she doesn't feel qualified for in the first place. women will not allow herself to become emotionally vulnerable Cat Theor y around you if you haven't demonstrated enough value, or if she "Why do you suppose we only feel compelled to chase the ones doesn't feel safe enough.Don't bother trying to convince her, argue who run away?"~ Vicomte De Valmont, Les liaisons Dangereuses with her, or otherwise engage her on a logical level Cats don' t take orders, but they can be tempted to chase. If you Don't act as if things are a big deal. Just repeat the words no tie a feather to the end of a string, and use it properly, YOU can problem in your head until you really believe it.No matter what get a cat to perform acrobatics. But isn't it interesting that if happens, it's no biff deal.A woman's reputation is very important you put the feather down in front of the cat, she will turn up her to her, and thus she is much more likely to indulge sexually when nose. Cats are always curious, especially about shiny new things she trusts that there will be no social consequences. such as the ball on a rubber cord, the catnip, the treats, the All women have a powerful interruption mechanism known as feather on a string, etc. She can be easily distracted but once she anti-slut defense or ASD. When you play solid game, you will be is invested in trying to catch something, it can become her single- able to escalate smoothly without triggering her ASD.A woman minded focus.There is a lot to learn from cats. If you push a cat off won't do anything that makes her feel responsible for the of you, she jumps back into your lap. If you want to hold her, then escalation she needs plausible deniability.The venusian artist she wants you to put her down.If she is feeling nasty she might must take responsibility to make tilings happen and act with bite or scratch. She craves attention and she gets jealous of other moxie.She will use congruence tests to provoke a reaction from cats. Sometimes she'll just rub against you and purr with you. Then her intuition tells her whether you seem congruent. She contentment you can really tell when a cat likes someone . tests in this way so that she can find your boundaries, which A cat sees the feather from across the room, but continues allows her to feel secure. This behavior is instinctive and allows about her business. Then the feather slightly moves and her gaze is her to more accurately determine what sort of man you really are. drawn. When the feather jumps once or twice more, she starts to Most women view men as an abundant resource.Thus it's not steadily creep in its direction. Jerk the string at just the right time, enough to attract hershe must become invested in the and the cat suddenly goes crazy, running circles around the worn, interaction. She will seek out fun and stimulation, and avoid flying over furniture to catch that feather.As the venusian artists confrontation and discomfort.The decimal scale is used for proceeds with a pickup, he keeps validation and attention just rating women based on their looks, from 1 to 10. slightly out of her reach. If he is too easily acquired, then she will As you proceed with the pickup, keep her just inside that window quickly grow bored and lose interest.But likewise if he is completely between validation and rejection. She must be baited to chase in unattainable, then she will also lose interest and give up small increments, just like a cat with a string.Don't ask about her Therefore, keep the bait just barely out of her reach and then boyfriend, and don't be fazed if she mentions him . Just take it continually entice her in small increments. as a hint that you telegraphed too much interest too soon, and Boyfriends then continue gaming as normal. When a woman says the words "I have a boyfriend," nine times Structure and the Game out of ten what she is really saying is 'You just telegraphed too The M3 model and the proper mindset for learning the Game much interest."It has nothing to do with whether she actually has Chapter 3 a boyfriend. In fact, if she is attracted to you,she will often The Mystery Method consists of several aspects.First,the M3 model deliberately hide the boyfriend from you until after yo u have describes the courtship process between a man and a woman from had sex with her.Whether she mentions him or not in no way the time they meet until the beginning of the sexual relationship. Second,group theory describes the application of social dynamics Where Beginning=Courtship(From meeting each other to and the M3 model to groups of people found in public settings. having sex),Middle=Sexual Relations(From intimacy, to no (This is important because high-caliber women are often found in intimacy)Ending=Break-up(From no intimacy, to no further this social context.) Third,the Mystery Method is a methodology for communication) practicing the game in the field,and fourth,it includes a set of field- Beginning(Courtship)=>Middle (Sexual Relations)=>Ending (Break- proven techniques that have arisen from this methodology, such as up). the Neg and the False Time Constraint, which are described in the Courtship subsequent chapters of this book. Further, every courtship,from meeting each other to having sex, The Game is played in th e Field has a beginning, middle , and an ending to it. The Game is not played on a computer or the Internet. It's not Mystery Method focuses on only these three stages.Mystery has played in a book. It's played in the real world, with real people and named these three courtship stages Beginning=Pick-up,Middle real situations. Only through repeated practice in the field can we =Mid-game,Ending=End-game. gain intuition and skill. Over time, these methods become Beginning => Middle => Ending habitual. Once internalized over a few disciplined weeks, it is in fact Pick-up => Mid-game => End-game easier to keep doing them than to stop . Attraction Focus on building your skill, not on getting laid or meeting The first focus of The Mystery Method is not seduction, but rather , you r new girlfriend. Think of it like you are learning a new video attraction. game . AT TRACT:transitive senses : to cause to approach or adhere: as Don' t obsess over a particular woman.Forget about that girl a : to pull to or draw toward oneself or itself <a magnet attracts you have been pining over for the past three months . iron> b : to draw by appeal to natural or excited interest, emotion, Don' t bothe r getting good at fixing things in the damage or aesthetic sense: ENTICE <attract attention>intransitive senses: zone . It' s easier to attract a new woman than it is to fix to exercise attractionEtymology: Middle English, from Latin things when they go wrong with your existing target. (When attractus, past participle of attrahere. from ad- + trahere to pull, things go right, attraction is created in seconds or minutes ,and draw sex occurs in four to ten hours.) SEDUCE : 1 : to persuade to disobedience or disloyalty,2: to lead The Mystery Method Newbie Drill astray usually by persuasion or false promises,3 : to carry out the Go ou t gaming four nights per week for four hours each night. physical seduction of: entice to sexual intercourseEtymology: Make three approaches per hour.This schedule allows for twenty Middle English, from Late Latin seducere, from Latin. to lead minutes per approach.That adds up to twelve approaches per night away, from se- apart + ducere - to lead which is forty-eight per week and two hundred per month . Mystery's proteges focus on attraction first, not seduction. (Chapter 4 covers the art of approaching.) Within a year you will Ethically, they are therefore attractors, not seducers. have approached over two thousand women . Mystery Method Statement of Ethics How man y women have you approached in the past year? The Secret of Attraction Calibration and Internalization There are a quantified number of fundamental attraction switches* After the first week or two in the field, approaches start to that are hard-wired into the sexual selection mechanism of every become a blur. Patterns emerge over time. Formerly puzzling social man and woman on Earth. behavior comes clearly into focus. Situations and reactions can In the same way that we feel an automatic overwhelming be easily predicted before they occur.This powerful social intuition, attraction towards any Sports Illustrated swimsuit model because derived from time in the field, is known as calibration. she turns on all our attraction switches, it is possible to make A skilled venusian artist will anticipate, and have a prepared women feel the exact same way towards us if we could only response for nearly any common social challenge.He has already devise a clever method for systematically turning on all attraction encountered this particular challenge before. He has experimented switches.Let' s try a simpl e though t experimen t to illustrate.. . with a variety of different responses, and he has compared notes *The attraction switch metaphor is of course just that: a with all of his friends on the subject as well. He has found an metaphor.Thought Experiment : Landi vs . Maudi.Part : Imagine effective answer, and he has already field-tested it and practiced it that Guess supermodel Land i Swanepoel stepped into the room to mastery. and began t o indicate her interest i n you perhaps by sitting on So when the challenge arises,the answer comes forth your lap. Visualize it for 15 seconds .How do you feel?Pa t B:Now automatically delivered into action by his unconscious mind. In the imagine Maude (Bea Arthu r from The Golden Girls) strutted in same way that all practiced behaviors become automatic, so does and sat on you r lap. Visualize it for 15 seconds .How do you feel the skill set of the Mystery Method . This process is known as now? internalization .Women are more socially savvy because they tend If yo u are a typical healthymale, many more attraction switches to be involved in more approaches likely turned on looking at Landi tha n Bea.# For a man to be in the Game , he must actively approach women. # No disrespect to Bea. Mystery thinks she's just marvelous. If he stops doing this, he has taken himself out of the Game. Result s - As you can feel, certain switches turn on in the But women cannot so easily make this choice. If she is attractive, presence of legitimate replication value. Certain ones may also men will approach her anyway. She needn't do anything but turn off in the presence of indicators which point to a replication simply be there she can't help it. For this reason, women value in the negative. Mating with a young fit girl will improve your usually have more calibration and social skill than men do . genes chances of successfully replicating over doing so with a They've had mor e practice. woman on menopause . Process over Outcome Our switches are wired to respond to qualities such as specific A venusian artist goes into the field night after night primarily hip to waist ratios,breast shape and size, facial and body to improve his calibration and to internalize his skill-set. He' s symmetry and other youth and health indicators .If a woman not trying to 'get this one girl,' or to 'get laid tonight.' Rather, possesses and can demonstrate a certain quality that one of he's practicing with the long-term goal of having a powerful social your sexual selection switches is programmed (evolutionarily skill-set You cannot allow the outcome of any given approach to adapted ) to respond to , you'll feel immediate attraction for carry much significance. It's like playing a video game: if your man her , without the need to even think about it.In fact , you won't dies, just hit the button and play again. If the outcome of any even have a choice abou t it .It is interesting to note that.. . specific approach becomes important to you, it'll have subtle, 80 % of a man' s attraction switches are set to respond to a insidious effects on your game and cause you to lose the set. You woman' s replication value. Only 20 % respond to her survival really do have to not care. Just like fishing or golfing, the process of value. playing the Game itself has to be its own reward. Only 20 % of a woman' s switches are set to respond to Everything comes full circle. After some months of practice, a man's replication value, while 80 % respond to his survival when your game becomes tight, your skills will enable you to enjoy value . women in whatever way that you please. And then you really won't Even if a woman has fake breasts, you will feel greater attraction care about approach anxiety, rejection or outcome - you'll just for her than if she was small-breasted.So many women wouldn't enjoy the ride.Ironically it is this ver y attitude tha t gets go through such extremes if it didn' t work to trigger attraction results.There is a certain Zen to pickup...the one who releases after all.So then, what qualities in a man are a woman's attraction all attachment to a desired outcome is ironically the one most switches set to respond to, and how do we systematically turn likely to realize that outcome. them on in rapid succession and in a practical manner in- Th e Sexual Relationship field?Previously we have discussed basic qualities such as looks Every long-term (sexually intimate) relationship has a beginning, and height, health and fitness, being comfortable and smiling, middle, and an ending. and so on . Now let's examine an attraction switch that is an orde r of magnitude greater in power.. . Pre-selection wome n i n particular, seductio n first i s little mor e tha n the This attraction switch exists not only in the sexual selection equivalent o f saying, "Yo u don' t kno w m e bu t will yo u mechanisms of people , but also in many animals. A male grouse sleep wit h me? " Ther e is a tim e (and a place) to begin the (a typ e of bird) will be hard-pressed to attract a female if he is seductio n stage, bu t it's no t until yo u first hav e attraction an alone. Place a stuffed female grouse beside him and other d comfor t - as well as privacy. females will soon enter his territory and mat e with him .Similarly, Seducers mistakenly begin at the end . Jus t like any typical if a woman considers a man to be sexually attractive to other guy, they often blatantly disregard a woman' s comfor t levels women , she will instantly feel an attraction towards him. Stand entirely. Eve n if there is a level of attraction base d on the by yourself at the bar and you will not appear nearly as seducer's appearanc e alone, this is supersede d by he r attractive as you would if you had two women hanging off your discomfort in having to deal with aggressive sexual advance arms. s from someon e she doesn' t kno w no r trust. I t i s bes t t o no t Demonstrating that you have women interested in you,in this direct prematurel y telegraph stron g sexual interes t until end-game . manner , is only one of many ways to trigger the same sexual Fool's Mate selection switch. Ther e are other ways. You can also wear female In th e gam e of chess, it is possibl e to wi n in only four moves . perfume. When a woman asks what you are wearing say, Thi s gambi t is called fool's mate. Winnin g with spee d via "Nothing. " Smell your collar an d then rememberin g say,"Ah, " an fool's mat e doe s no t howeve r mak e yo u a ches s d smile to yourself. champion . If anything, it only demonstrate s you r Another way to flip her pre-selection switch is to have a lipstick opponent' s inexperience. A n experience d chess player will no t kiss on your cheek.In the same way you feel greater attraction for eve n attemp t a fast fool's mat e for, if th e opponen t doesn' t a woman if she has an appealing hip to waist ratio ,a woman will take the bait, he leaves th e player in a wea k position . feel the exact same way towards you because of that all- Similarly, while it is possible to seduc e with speed, it is muc important lipstick kiss.There are a good many mor e ways to flip h less probabl e on a woma n wh o is socially experienced . In the pre-selection switch,and there are many more switches to be the venusia n arts, we refer to 'seductio n first' tactics as flipped.The secret of attraction, which is utilized in the attraction fool's mat e for its metaphorica l similarity. Instead , bot h stage of The Mystery Method , is to know what these switches chess champion s an d venusia n artists prefer to play a solid are, and then endeavor to systematically switch all of them on! game.Fool' s mat e ca n wor k i n som e situations that ma y b e There is no quicker or more powerful attraction than this. acceptabl e t o you , such a s o n drun k girls an d thos e wh o Chapters 5 and 6 examine the subject of attraction in depth,as hav e a propensit y toward s having on e nigh t stands. Jus t don' well as the various tactics used for generating and using it. t let i t b e you r only ''winnin g move. " M3 M3 Sequencin g Mistak e # 2: To Start in The Middle Pick-u p => Mid-game => End-game Middl e=>Endin g Th e M3 Model Build Comfort=>Seduce Only after you attract can seduction take place. However , before The Nice Guy a woman wh o is attracted to you will be seduced, there is one Man y me n understan d an d appreciat e that seduction first additional crucial stage: you must build comfort. (Chapters 7 make s wome n feel uncomfortable . What they do instead is and 8 of this book describe the comfort and seduction phases of focus on comfor t first.Wha t these me n don' t realize i s tha t the Mystery Method.) wome n o f beaut y ge t bombarde d b y these nice guys Attrac t => Build Comfort => Seduce every day, an d it ca n gro w quite tiresome . While no t as We no w have the main focus for each stage in M3 : offensive as the seducer, the nice guy is no less a bother . Ther e Pick-up= Attrac t , Mid-game=Build Comfort ,End-game=Seduce are simply to o man y nice guys approachin g the m in a day to Pick-up => Mid-game => End-game indulge in th e sam e old lengthy dialogue time after time. Withou Attrac t => Build Comfort => Seduce t attraction first, simply saying "Hi, I' m Joe. What' s your name? Seduction is Mutual " will smack of every nice gu y before you . Wh y woul d a If during the mid-game stage, you can build enough comfort with woma n wh o isn' t attracte d t o yo u care wha t you r nam e i a woman for her to be alone in a room with you,then she will s o r bothe r t o even remembe r it? Wh y woul d she divulge readily agree to have sex with you in the end-game stage.In fact , personal informatio n just becaus e yo u asked? she may very well try t o seduce you. The Protection Shield Metaphor Attrac t Build Comfort = Seduce If a woma n is no t attracted to you , an y comfor t building 1 + 2 = 3 attemp t will bor e her. Trying t o tell he r abou t you , Therefore,if you only wor k to structure a convenient opportunity ge t he r t o talk abou t herself, o r complimentin g he r for her to seduce you, there will otherwise be little reason to focus before she deserve s it are all comfor t building attempts . If on seduction directly. you've ever bee n trappe d i n a conversatio n with someon e Not So Fast yo u wer e no t intereste d i n talking to , you'll understan d ho w Unfortunately, none of this is possibl e without attraction. She uncomfortabl e i t ca n be . will certainly not be seeking comfort with you if there's no Imagin e this happenin g to yo u several times a day, almos t attraction.And be warned:if you seek comfor t prematurely, i t will every* day, for man y years. Wouldn' t yo u recognize the nee d onl y mak e you less attractive to her. Or wors e you'll ge t t o shut these peopl e dow n before they even go t started? stuc k in the friendship zone.Onc e there is attraction, she Ove r time , as a woma n interacts wit h ever mor e nice guys, will probabl y seek comfor t with you. Thi s shoul d b e she begins to evolve simple ve t effective strategies for interprete d a s th e indicato r o f interes t that i t is . counterin g this barrage of bore . Collectively these strategies T o recap , the thre e mai n objectives i n Th e Mystery Metho d mak e up wha t is metaphorically called he r protection are:Pick-up(To attract a woman) Mid-game(To establish shield. comfort, trust, and connection) End-game (To structure 'Comfort first ' telegraph s sexua l interes t an opportunity to be seduced). Simply b y approachin g he r an d bein g nice, wome n o f The Elusive Obvious beaut y assume yo u wan t somethin g from them . I f she doesn' Illustrated thu s simply, th e linear relationshi p betwee n t thin k yo u are selling somethin g (or begging for change), attraction , comfort, an d seductio n seem s intuitive an d she'll reaso n it' s becaus e yo u wan t t o wi n he r sexual self-evident. Yet venusian artists the worl d over hav e favor. Eve n if yo u aren't intereste d in he r sexually, she'll repeatedly struggled with problem s tha t arise fro m improper assum e yo u are, just because yo u approache d he r i n th e M 3 sequencing. sam e manne r a s the last half-a-doze n nice guys di d that night. Th e Four M3 Sequencing Mistakes Him ; Nice boots / Her ; I have a boyfriend 1. SEDUCTIO N FIRS T to start at the end. Mos t me n mistak e these short-ter m defenses for long-ter m 2. COMFOR T FIRS T to start in the middle. personalit y flaws. Thi s quite ofte n turn s me n off an d it is 3. ATTRACTION BUT NO COMFORT - to start at the beginning but for this very reaso n that thes e strategies work . Fro m them skip the middle and go straight to the end. it's bette r t o allow a bunc h o f me n she doesn' t hav e 4. ATTRACTION AN D COMFORT ONLY to start at the beginning attraction for to thin k she is a bitc h tha n to hav e to sit ther e an but get stuck in the middle. d listen to the m all. M3 Sequencing Mistake # 1: To Start at The End Him : What's your name?/Her : Get lost Endin g=Seduce Som e woma n ma y tolerate mildly entertainin g nice gu y The Seducer dialogue, bu t onc e the conversatio n begin s to gro w Th e mos t commo n erro r that beginner s make i s t o focus mundane , she'll excuse herself. Persisten t nice guys will mee o n seducing a woma n first instea d of attracting her. Thi s is t greater resistance as she become s wear y of his prolonge like puttin g th e cart before the horse . Often , t o beautiful d presence. Althoug h playing a bitc h ca n becom e a for m of entertainmen t for some , mos t wome n wit h protectio n shield s similarity, venusia n artists call these situations buyer's use the m for goo d reaso n an d are otherwis e very nic e people . remorse. Him-Hi, how are you?/Her:Look,I'm not going to have sex with you. A Case Study: Joe Meets Janine If yo u don' t tak e the time to attract a woma n first, yo u won' t Th e Man's Point of Vie w give he r a reaso n for he r to wan t to even hav e a conversatio Joe meets a beautiful woman named Janine and they build n with you. Thi s will force he r to raise he r shields. Kee p attraction for each other. Joe soon finds himself making out with comfor t building t o mid-game , an d don' t prematurely begin in her that night. Unable to take her somewhere private at that the middle . time. Joe gets her number and they agree to see each other M3 Sequencin g Mistak e # 3: To Start at the Beginning but another night. He excitedly tells his buddies he met his next Skip the Middle girlfriend.Joe calls Janine the next evening, but she is cold and Beginning(Attract)=>Ending(Seduce) unresponsive on the phone. He tries to convince her to see him as Ever y beginnin g an d ending has a middle , an d in M3 , that they agreed but she's now 'busy'. Leaving several messages. Janine middl e is comfort . Ther e is a tim e to seduce a girl (or be never returns a single call. Weeks pass and Joe and Janine never seduced), bu t it's no t until after you hav e built comfort . get together again. He is left confused, frustrated, and alone. He The Player repeats this pattern over and over. A player is a venusia n artist wh o begin s at the beginnin g Thi s scenario i s typical o f ho w a n otherwise great guy an d successfully attracts a girl bu t fails to avoid the thre e succumb s t o th e buyer's remors e trap. Man y hav e fallen player traps. Th e first is a failure to justify his attraction for int o it again an d again an d lost man y opportunitie s at love. reasons that g o beyon d he r looks . H e has revealed his growin What went wrong? g attractio n to o quickly. Th e secon d is a failure to Here' s wha t happened . appreciate th e importanc e o f mid-gam e before end-game . Th e Woman' s Point of View Th e thir d i s a failure t o sto p yourself (and th e woman ) While Janine did enjoy making out with Joe, he did not take it upon from goin g to o far to o soon . himself to slow down the sexual escalation and remain in the Ever y venusia n artist mus t be aware of these player traps. comfort building stage. She truly did wish see him again, but only Th e Thre e Player Traps : in the moment. When Joe called the next day, Janine wasn't in the 1. NO T JUSTIFYING A MUTUAL ATTRACTION. same aroused emotional state as the night before. Due to cultural 2. DISREGARDIN G COMFORT . programming she felt a little guilty for doing what she did with 3 . BUYER'S REMORS E someone she didn't really know. She knew the only reason Joe Player Trap #1 : Not Justifying a Mutual Attraction even called was to continue what was now making her feel Justifiably to men, a woman' s beaut y ca n be so intoxicating to us uncomfortable just thinking about. If she did see him again. she that this alone qualifies he r a s girlfriend material. W e canno t didn't know how he would behave. Would he grope her and make let he r kno w w e choos e he r base d o n he r look s because i her feel even more uncomfortable? She just didn't know him well t doesn' t seem genuin e an d make s u s appea r like othe r enough to trust his future actions. Being one to indulge in her typical men .A woman' s indicator s o f interest, o r IOIs , notify emotions, she allowed her emotions to once again make her whe n t o g o from th e attract stage t o th e comfor t stage, bu decisions. Uncomfortable even talking to him on the phone, Janine t yo u mus t no t d o s o until sh e has legitimately earne d is cold to him and lies, saying she's too busy to talk your IOI s as well! Gettin g IOI s from a woma n is simply When the confused Joe tried to change her mind, Janine took this no t enoug h reaso n to begi n returnin g them . If yo u are to as an attempt to manipulate her. She just didn't want to be o easy, she will mar k yo u as anothe r notc h i n he r belt pressured into having sex with someone she didn't feel comfortable an d mov e o n i n search o f mor e challenging conquests . and safe with, especially when she was not even aroused. Som e IO I Examples : Joe was hard-pressed to change her emotional state on the phone. She touches you. When you say, "Hands off the merchandise", For all he knew at the time, with so many elements out of his she touches youagain. control. Janine may have just had a fight with her room mate or When you grab her hands and hold them, she holds back. just changed the kitty litter box. Over the next week or two, every She laughs at all your humorous remarks, and the ones that time he left a message, her feelings of discomfort grew. She has no aren't funny. intention of ever seeing this guy again. When you ask her to bite your neck, she does. Joe shouldn' t blam e Janin e for he r stringing him along After all, She asks you for your name. it was he wh o ultimately designe d this situation by no t Yo u mus t first encourag e he r t o demonstrat e qualities tha staying in the comfor t stage for an appropriat e lengt h of t ca n substantiate you r attraction. If you don't , she ma y time.A s han d holdin g escalates t o kissing (mor e o n ho w t suspec t that yo u onl y played with he r emotions , callously o perfor m Mystery's kiss tactic later), you will quickly approac h attracting he r in a gam e to wi n anothe r score . She will feel a poin t of no retur n in whic h buyer's remors e is likely. uncomfortabl e bein g attracted to yo u an d she will lose this Beware : attractio n for yo u quickly. You r attractio n stage dialogue will in The Buyer's Remorse Point of No Return fact be viewed as conniving an d she will perceiv e yo u as Thi s poin t of no return exists wher e kissing turns int o emotionally manipulative. In this light, a player is simply a foreplay withou t enoug h comfor t seducer with goo d openin g game Havin g successfully negotiated KISS:To touch or caress with the lips as a mark of affection (or beyon d the first player trap, th e venusian artist move s ont o greeting)Etymology: Middle English, from Old English cyssan; comfor t building. akin to Old HighGerman kussen to kiss Date: before 12th century Player Trap #2 : Disregarding Comfor t FOREPLAY:Mutual sexual stimulation preceding intercourse If yo u seduc e a woma n before building enoug h comfort , Date: 1929 he r attraction for yo u will tur n off. T o kee p this fro m Not e ho w a choic e yo u mak e at on e time will determin e happening , w e mus t build enoug h comfor t s o ou r seductio th e outcom e of a situation a day o r mor e later. Beware ! Onc n won' t mak e he r feel uncomfortable . D o no t cross th e e you cross the poin t o f n o return , unless yo u hav e enoug h line from comfor t t o seductio n until yo u have enoug h comfort . comfor t established so yo u can ge t he r to a nearby private Whe n d o yo u kno w yo u hav e enough comfort t o begin location to hav e sex with he r (before he r arousal wanes) , yo u seduction? will later ge t buyer's remorse .It is only a seducer wh o Th e Seven Hou r Rule considers th e optio n of taking he r to a nearb y bathroo m Attrac t=>Build Comfort=>Seduce=7 Hours stall. Furthe r consider that if your girlfriend of tw o years It usually takes an average of four to ten cumulative wouldn' t feel comfortabl e having sex wit h yo u in a publi c hour s of comfor t building before she is ready for seduction. bathroom , don' t expect someon e yo u me t just twenty minute s (No t countin g Fool' s Mate.) Ther e is no black-and-whit e rule ago to , n o matte r ho w aroused . Thi s i s a foots mate fantasy for determinin g whe n th e tim e ha s com e only you r an d no t solid game . Yo u ma y lose an otherwise great calibration can tell yo u that. (Mor e o n the Seven Hou r Rul e opportunit y i f yo u pus h for seductio n to o soon . later.) (Althoug h o n th e rare occasion that th e tw o of yo u are Player Trap #3: Buyer's Remorse willing, enjoy yourself.) Buyer's remors e occur s whe n a perso n buys somethin g o Non-sexua l intunat e kissing is a welcome d comfor t stage n a n emotiona l whim , only t o later regret the purchase . action. In fact, if you wait too long to kiss her, Similarly, wome n wh o are attracte d t o yo u ma y b e pushe d she will at some point become disinterested and you o r g o to o far to o soon . While i n the momen t she ma y will lose the opportunity to lass her in the future. indulge in he r attraction or sexual arousal, only to regret Generally, this typ e of "comfor t kissing" lasts less tha n 30 he r feelings or actions later. Fo r its metaphorica l second s an d doe s no t include tongue . Kissing expresses an d builds a sense of connection . Foreplay o n th e othe r han d belongs i n the seductio n stage Ther e are the e types o f location changes tha t commonl y occu r only. Generally, this consists o f French-kissing whic h leads t whil e gaming. The y are th e Move, the Bounce, an d the Time o sexual touching . I t sexually arouses each othe r i n Bridge. Briefly described here, these location change s are preparatio n fo r sex. A s kissing prematurel y turn s t o covered in greater detail in th e subsequen t chapter s of this book foreplay, it's tim e t o pus h he r off o f you. .MOV E -Mov e th e girl to a different area of th e curren t It s best no t t o begin foreplay unti l yo u hav e th e venue . comfor t an d privacy necessary t o transition naturally t o BOUNC E-Yo u an d th e girl exit th e curren t venu e together, an d sex. Whe n pushin g he r off you , let he r kno w tha t it's go to a different venu etogether. neithe r the TIM E BRIDG E-Sometime s it is no t possibl e to escalate. right time no r place t o b e getting to o ho t an d heavy. Perhap s som eoutsid e factor requires yo u t o exchang e Agreeably, this is very toug h an d it is at this poin t that mos t me contac t informatio n an d continu e gamin g th e girl a t a n fail.To help yo u pas s this trial, yo u ma y ask yourself this very later tim e an d place . Thi s i s called a Tim e Bridge . serious question:"Do I want one night of petting, or countless Th e Nin e Phase s o f th e M 3 Mode l nights of sex?" Th e thre e step s o f th e M 3 Mode l - Attract , Comfort , T o kno w whethe r yo u are nearin g th e poin t o f n o and Seduc e - are i n tur n broke n dow n int o thre e phase s return , ask yourself:"Is this foreplay?" each . Thoug h the y ar e briefly describe d here , th e nin e I f th e answe r i s yes, stop! Pus h he r away. Build phase s o f th e M 3 Mode l are covere d i n muc h comfort , no t arousal. It takes a real ma n wit h reserve to say greate r detail i n th e subsequen t chapter s o f this book . this:"Whoa, we better stop. Come on, let's rejoin our ATTRACTION:A1 OPEN,A2-FEMALE-TO-MALE INTEREST A3-MALE- friends." TO-FEMAL E INTEREST Notic e ho w "our friends" are really "her friends." Wit h this COMFORT:C1-CONVERSATION,C2-CONNECTION,C3-INTIMAC Y winnin g mov e yo u build trust b y demonstratin g you wan t SEDUCE:S1 FOREPLAYS,S2-LMR,S3-SE X get t o kno w he r for mor e tha n her mer e sexual favor. A1-OPEN-Th e ma n approache s a set, run s an opener , an Since yo u no w know she is sexually attracted to you, yo u ma d reaches the Social Hoo k Point. y feel secure in tha t fact whe n yo u have established enoug h A2 FEMALE-TO-MALE INTEREST Th e ma n demonstrate s comfor t to get he r int o a privat e seduction location (like your higher value, while simultaneously showin g disinterest in bedroom. ) Yo u may the n sexually arous e he r an d allow the target. She respond s by giving indicators of interest. natur e to take its cours e unimpeded.Yo u may build intimacy A3 MALE-TO-FEMALE INTEREST Th e ma n bait s the an d ge t close t o th e poin t o f n o retur n several times, so woma n t o becom e mor e invested i n th e lon g as yo u are th e first to pus h he r away each time you'v e interaction, an d the n h e reward s he r efforts wit h indicators reache d it. o f interest . M3 Sequencing Mistak e # 4: Starting at the Beginning but C1 CONVERSATION -Th e coupl e begins a conversatio n Getting Stuck in the Middle an d grow s from a sens e of comfor t and rappor t int o Beginning(Attract)=>Middle(Build Comfort) a feeling of connection . The Friend C2 CONNECTIO N-Bot h parties feel a vibe tha t "it i s on. " The friend is someon e wh o fears expressing his romanti c inten t Kissin g occurs. Thi s phas e may last ove r th e cours e o f to a woma n he has spen t time attracting an d getting t o several dates . know . H e become s entrappe d i n the comfor t stage, circling C 3 INTIMAC Y- No w at a seductio n location, heavy aroun d endlessly. H e fails t o seize th e opportunit y an d making- ou t ensue s an d the coupl e move s int o the develo p the relationships potential b y no t completin g th e bedroom . comfor t stage t o mov e o n t o th e seductio n stage. S1 FOREPLAY-The couple begins th e physical escalation toward The Friendship Zone s sex. If tills happen s to o soo n i t ca n cause buyer' s I t durin g th e comfor t stage yo u d o no t conve y t o a remorse . woma n that yo u are a potential romanti c interest t o her, she S2-LM R-Last-Minut e Resistance. Thi s i s th e poin t o f n o ma y no t b e intuitive enoug h t o see that yo u are. B y no t retur n before sex occurs . It' s often a freak-out momen t holdin g he r hands , smelling he r neck, o r kissing he r durin g for th e woman . th e comfor t stage yo u tra p yourself there , unabl e to S3-SE XSexual intercourse . It is necessar y to do this procee d further. A woma n ma y gro w s o comfortabl e wit h several times in orde r to begin th e sexual your non-sexual natur e tha t she will prefer yo u stay tha t relationship. way. Whe n yo u finally attemp t t o mov e int o the seductio n Putting It All Together stage wit h a woma n an d you hear he r say, "Let's just be A1. A venusian artist with tight game approaches a set of people in friends," you kno w yo u hav e fallen int o the friendship a bar, using an indirect opener. He doesn't seem needy or zone. interested in the target, and in fact comes across as though he's You cannot begi n seductio n until yo u en d th e comfor t stage, just leaving. He then demonstrates higher value to the set and bu t yo u canno t d o tha t until yo u hav e built enoug h crosses the Social Hoo k Point. comfort . She mus t b e comfortabl e wit h you r sexuality too A2. He continues to convey his personality using stories, . Thi s occurs whe n kissing he r doe s no t mak e he r feel humor, patterns, games, routines, palm reading, poetry, etc. uncomfortable . Whe n yo u are alone wit h he r an d yo u This, combined with his apparent disinterest in the target, raises his begi n th e seductio n stage, yo u don' t wan t he r to be shocke d social value relative to hers and intensifies her emotional state. She by you r sudden sexual interest. begins to give him indicators of interest. Kno w that it is neither wrongful no r a sin to structure an A3, C1. He uses this to bait her into chasing after him to earn his opportunit y for mutua l seduction. After all, building a sexual affections. As she becomes more invested in the interaction, he relationship benefits he r too . rewards her with indicators of interest. Then he moves her to a To recap , th e problem s associate d wit h imprope r M 3 quiet area of the bar to begin building comfort. sequencin g are : C2, C3 . With a bounce to Mel's Diner and a time bridge for sushi 1. Starting at the end fool's mate problem s the next day, he builds comfort, connection, and trust over a 2. Starting at the middl e protection shield problem s cumulative seven hour period. At some point early during this 3. Starting at th e beginnin g bu t skipping th e middl e = phase they will begin kissing. They eventually bounce to his buyer's remorse problem s apartment. 4. Starting at the beginnin g bu t getting stuc k in the middl S1, S2, S3. Finally, he moves her into his bedroom, begins e = friendship zone problem s foreplay, overcomes any last-minute resistance, and has sex with Gaming Locations her. A solid game courtship that ends in sex will rarely if ever take place Chapte r Thre e Revie w in its entirety in only one physical location. It is highly improbable The Game is played in the Field. Get out more. that a woma n yo u have never me t before will knock on your Th e Mystery Metho d Newbi e Drillo Go out gaming four bedroo m doo r and invite herself in. Natur e demands that yo nights per week for four hours each night.o Make three u leave your bedroo m and travel to a different location wher approaches per hour. e meeting her is muc h mor e probable. This is where man y Gaming is like golfing or fishing. You must enjoy the lonely me n fail miserably. process and release expectation from outcome in order to get the Ther e are i n fact thre e separate locatio n types yo u an d you r best results in the long term. romanti c interest will likely visit:Meeting Location=>Comfort Every sexual relationship has a beginning, middle, and Building location =>Sex Location ending. The beginning is known as the courtship. Location Changes The courtship has three stages, known as thepick-up, mid- m to actively socialize, such as whe n wome n go ou t "just to game, and end-game. dance. "Thi s is a perfect example of rationalization at work. Mystery Method focuses on attraction first, not seduction. Attractive women are found in groups Ethically, practitioners of the Mystery Method are attractors, not Seldom will you see wome n of beauty alone in such seducers. locations. Many have grown accustomed to the constant There are certain hardwired attraction switches in every hreat of nice guys that plague these gatherings. The y learn to woman's mind. Attraction is not a conscious choice that people band together with trusted friends to help protec t the m make. Rather, it's a response that they feel automatically as a from these everyday public nuisances. result of these switches being flipped. A meeting location is said tobe target rich if it offers multiple One example of this is preselection This switch gets approac h opportunities with attractive wome n in short triggered when a woman sees that you have already been pre- succession; whereas a location with few such opportunities is said approved by other women. to be target poor. Target rich environments no t only improv e your The M3 Model describes the structure of the courtship as chances of finding and attracting a beautiful woman , they also occurring in three steps: Attract, Build Comfort, and Seduce. It substantially accelerate your learning curve by providing mor e is necessary to build comfort before you can seduce a woman, and chances to practice your social skills in less time. Proactively it is necessary to build attraction before she will bother to build choos e to go to the very best meeting locations ahea d of time. comfort with you. Hired Guns The phenomenon where you occasionally get sex even You may thank the managers of many meeting locations for hiring when you haven't built enough comfort is known as Fool's attractive women because they have performed the difficult task of Mate. finding these wome n for you. These hired guns include seating There are three types of location changes: theMove, the hostesses, shooter girls, bartenders, go-go dancers, and Bounce, and the Time Bridge. promotional models. Most are chosen primarily for their physical Women have certain strategies; built-up over time, that looks. The Mystery Method incorporates specific attraction enable them to avoid constant approaches from men. This is tactics for hired guns, including exotic dancers. (These hired known as the protection shield. Even though she is gun tactics are no t written in this book.) probably a nice person, she can sometimes appear bitchy as Proximity a result of this. It's not who she really is. Whe n you are in the field, a shy woman , reluctant to even make While comfort building, it is important to convey to her that eye contact with you, ma y find yo u visually appealing an d on a you are a sexual man and a potential romantic interest. Otherwise conscious or unconscious level reveal he r interest throug h her you can get trapped in the friendship zone. proximity.Typically if a girl is giving you proximity, she will be The three steps of the M3 Model are broken down into standing five or six feet away and she won' t be facing your three phases each: Al The Approach. A2 Female-to- direction. Dynami c social homeostasis brings he r to the perimeter, Male Interest. A3 Male-to-Female Interest C1 Conversation. bu t prevents her from comin g to o close. C2 Connection. C3 Intimacy. S1 Foreplay. S2 Last- If you open her, she will open receptively. Minute Resistance. S3 Sex. Have yo u ever walked int o a nightclub an d found yourself There are three types of locations: the Meeting location, the standing near a woma n you wer e attracted to, if only to be Comfort-building locations, and the Seduction location. near her and check her ou t more ? Maybe instead of approaching The pick-up occurs at the meeting location and covers the her, you ordered a drink at the bar right next to her. Have yo u phases Al , A2, A3, and C1. It usually includes at least one move ever been in a store shopping wher e it seemed that a woma n you and ends with a bounce or time bridge. ha d seen earlier stoo d near you several times over a short perio d The next stage, called mid-game, occurs in one or several of time?He r repeated proximity indicates a potential interest. She comfort-building locations and covers the C2 phase. Various may be putting herself near yo u on purpos e hopin g that you bounces and time bridges may occur here. When this stage is over, might start something. It's also quite possible that her you will be with her in the seduction location and you've already replication circuitry is placing her near you , even though been somewhat intimate with her(kissing, etc.) she is not consciously aware of what her body is doing. The final stage, called end-game, begins in C3 but soon She will still ope n receptively.Thes e opportunities occur with shifts into S1 (foreplay.) Often last- minute resistance (S2) mor e frequency than yo u ma y have previously noticed, so pay will come up, which is normal, followed by sex (S3.) If you attention. initiate foreplay before enough comfort has been built, it will cause Th e 3-Second Rule buyer's remorse. Yo u wan t t o b e i n a se t withi n thre e second s o f It is necessary to have sex several times before the sexual enterin g th e venue . Just walk right up to the first set of people relationship actually begins. During and even after this point she that yo u see and ope n them . This is called the 3-second rule. will continue testing you for congruence. Remember, you are no t only working the set, bu t the entire Chapter 4 room-No one else know s whether yo u are already A1 : Th e Approach acquainted wit h these people. It certainly seems as if yo u kno w Opening a set and crossing the Social Hook Point without conveying the m yo u entered the venue, walked right up to them, an d no Neediness O nce you begin talking to a set of girls, the immediate w they are having a fun conversation with you. Yo u mus t be a goal is to reach the Social Hook Point, A momen t comes whe n social guy with lots of friends! the set decides that they enjoy talking to you, an d that they The n you mov e on to the next set, and the positive perception of wan t to continue talking toyou. Whe n this happens , yo u have yo u continues to grow. Yo u are becoming socially proofed in successfully opene d the set an d finished Al . It's easy to tell whe this venue. Notice the magical ease with which sets will ope n n this happen s because there will be indicators of interest. up to yo u whe n yo u have this level of social proo f Fo r this Th e Meeting Location reason, it is important no t to be to o selective in choosing your An y location in whic h there is a high probabilit y of meetin g sets. It's better to be in a set than to get picky an d en d up wome n is called a meeting location. While it is possible to alone whe n yo u should be working the room . mee t a beautiful woma n virtually anywhere, eve n on th e Anothe r interpretatio n o f the three-second rule states: Withi n street, it is mor e probable to mee t he r in a public thre e second s o f spottin g a se t tha t yo u wan t t o open , yo u gathering. mus t ope n tha t set .This really adds a natural spontaneity to Meetin g location s are gatherings i n whic h peopl e sell- the approach. Th e difference in your state of mind is organize int o small group s of usually tw o to five friends each . noticeable. A woma n ca n usually tell whe n a ma n is working up Examples : the courage to approach her, whic h can lower he r perception of Restaurants and busy cafes his value. Bu t if you follow the three second rule, she will have a Pubs, bars and nightclubs feeling like yo u just poppe d up ou t of nowhere. A very nice Busy stores, malls and outdoor festivals energy is added to the interaction whe n following this rule. Parties and get-togethers Social Proof The unconscious replication agenda Some players ca n be seen walking aroun d the venue, People often publicly assemble to drink, mingle, dance, shop , or eyeballing all the wome n and looking for a goo d on e to eat. While some kno w they are ou t specifically to seek a approach. This behavior looks predatory, an d is quite transparent mate , many are unaware that their unconscious min d has to the people in the crowd-Similarly, some guys may be seen impose d a hidde n replication agenda upo n them. Eve n standing in a group, peering aroun d at the field. If they don' t loo k though wome n kno w these gatherings are chalk-full of pestering like they are having a great time together, if they aren't hanging ou nice guys, mos t are unconscious of the fact that nonetheless, t with girls, if they aren't running a set ...the n they will start to their, emotional circuitry has a replication agenda compelling the lose social status. Whe n on e of the m finally does ope n a set, he ma y discover that opening is mor e difficult in environments A ring- wher e he has negative social proof. Saving she has a boyfriend Whereas a venusian artist, rolling in wit h his wing, is no t Surrounding herself with friends. going to be looking around at the people in the crowd. Rather, Sitting in a place wher e it is har d to approach her. he's going to be talking to his wing, and it will appear as if they are Being bitchy; using insults. two high-value guys having a great time together. Negative bod y language. If he were looking aroun d the venue, especially with a serious No eve contact. expression on his face, it would telegraph that he is looking for Disinterest. something mor e fun an d of mor e value than the spo t where he Being bubbl y an d wanting t o dance. already is. Bu t he isn't. He believes that the mos t fun and N o sense o f humor . valuable spot in the field is his ow n spot, his ow n reality - Being defensive. an d he is congruent with that.Wome n are searching for a ma n Th e openin g phas e is the time that it takes you to get past th e whos e reality is mor e fun an d mor e valuable than their own. Yo shield an d reach the hoo k point. Yo u might try pushin g u mus t be congruent with the value that you hav e to offer, an d it throug h the shield with persistence, despite the fact that the mus t be apparent to the room . Follow the three-second rule, an d woma n is treating yo u poorly, bu t this is foolish and yo u will be in set muc h mor e often, resulting in higher social diminishes your value.Wha t if yo u ca n trick her int o lowering proof he r shield? This mean s making the woma n believe yo u are It's interesting that whenever you have mor e social proof, yo u no t here to steal her eggs. She mus t thin k that you aren't even will get noticeably mor e occurrences of proximity. Girls will considering seducing her.On e way to do this is to say things that also give you other approach invitations, such as making eve an interested ma n would never say. These are called Negs, and contact. Remembe r that it's no t necessary (nor is it necessarily they are described in the next chapter. desirable) to wait around for AI (approach invitations,) because Anothe r way is to enter he r set with a pawn. A paw n is a with practice, a venusian artist can consistently ope n sets even girl that you have gamed previously for the express purpos e of withou t AI. bringing he r into your next set, so that it will ope n easier. Tips in th e Venue Anothe r way to get throug h the shield is throug h the use Bars an d clubs are probabl y no t th e venue s wher e yo u of disinterested body language an d false time constraints. pla n t o fin d you r future wife. Nevertheless , thes e are These techniques are described in detail in this chapter.Notic e target rich environment s an d thu s are perfect for practicin g that all of these tactics have one thing in common : game . Her e are som e tips: they convey disinterest. In othe r words, wome n aren't so As a genera l rule bu t no t a dogmati c on e don' t offer shielded against me n wh o have a willingness to walk. Wome n to buy drinks for girls. If she asks yo u to bu y he r a drink, feel safe aroun d those men. turn he r down . Althoug h yo u ca n brea k this rule , it's Whatever happens , it's crucial that yo u not be affected preferable t o ge t you r gam e so tight tha t she will be buying by he r shielding behavior, no matter ho w unacceptable such you drinks. behavior may be. If she is able to shake your internal sense of B e willing t o cras h an d bur n o n every set for the entire reality, your value will dro p in he r eyes. Neve r get angry just night. D o it for fun with you r wing. stay in a goo d moo d an d be unaffected. It's no big deal. Giv e you r wing S200. The n h e gives yo u $20 every As you demonstrat e value, an d an utter lack of neediness, she tim e yo u approac h a set. Thi s gam e is ver y effective. will start to ope n up to you. Ho w will you kno w that you hav e Be willing to go ou t alone if yo u hav e to . disarmed her shield? Don' t hol d you r drink in fron t of you r chest like a Whe n she laughs at your jokes. security blanket. Hol d i t lo w t o you r hip . Whe n she turns to face you, gives you eve contact, an d is Don' t try to loo k 'cool' or 'tough,' or yo u will just responsive to you. loo k boring. Instead , b e comfortabl e an d friendly. Whe n she touches you - usually a soft grab of your ar m or Enthusias m is contagious. leg, or your necklace or hair. Smile as yo u walk aroun d the venue . Guy s wh o don' t Whe n she asks you your name. ge t laid, don' t smile. Canne d Materia l Onc e yo u ope n a set, sto p smiling s o much . Yo u Th e Mystery Metho d makes use of canned material. If a don' t wan t t o appear try-hard. particular value- demonstrating routine has been internalized, Yo u ra n you r opener , bu t th e se t didn' t hook ? Ru n an d is ready for use in set, then that routine is said to be in anothe r one . Stack you r material i f for n o othe r reaso n the can. tha n t o ge t practice. Stacking routine s is a useful skill in-and-o A venusian artist wh o can deliver canne d material properly f itself. will be able to generate consistent, powerful responses while he It usually takes three warm-up approaches to really get is in set. It is a poten t tool. Of course, no single tool should ever in the groove. becom e a crutch it's also vitally important for the open-minde d Avoi d nois y areas. If yo u can' t talk, yo u can' t ru n game . venusian artist to practice spontaneous, natural conversations. Ther Fin d the quiet areas of th e club . An d avoi d th e danc e floor e is something to be said for basic social skills! Nevertheless, your it's a trap . skill set is incomplete withou t the ability to congruently deliver Arrive early an d be friendly wit h the staff. At midnight , canned material.It is recommende d that yo u create a routine bounc e to anothe r club. Thi s keeps th e crow d fresh stack of canned material that you can practice in the field. Tha t an d gives yo u somewher e t o take girls that you'v e bee n is, an opener, a few routines, a few negs, an d so on. gaming . While practicing your routine stack, approaches start to becom e a Don' t drink. O r a t least cu t back. I f yo u g o ou t blur. Patterns emerge over time. Situations and reactions become gamin g withou t alcohol, you will really notic e an improvemen t in easily predictable before they occur. Social challenges are your abilities. discovered an d solved. Th e rest of the world is riving by at hyper- Male competition . Ye s ther e are othe r guys bu t speed. they don' t count . The y don' t smile; they don' t surroun d Onc e yo u have performe d a particular routine hundreds or themselve s wit h talking an d laughing people , they don' t walk thousands of times, you don' t even hav e to think abou t wha t aroun d wit h a smile on their face. Instea d they hol d a you are saying. You r min d is free for other tasks, such as beer to their ches t an d try to look cool' Thes e guys are no t planning logistics. Th e target is consciously considering her really competitio n at all. responses, bu t yo u have already ha d this conversation a thousan Befriend the social guys , an d practic e gamin g them . d times before. Yo u have already fully explored all the On e o f th e attraction switches in wome n is the lender of conversational threads that could possibly arise from this piece of men switch. When you lead the men, the women will follow material. It's almost like seeing the future. Be the observed. Ther e are constantl y little event s Creating your own material goin g on in the Field: A flash goe s off as a grou p of peopl e pos e Although certain stock routines are included in this boo k - an d for a picture. A ma n teache s a woma n a little danc e move . many mor e are traded online - it is recommende d that in the lon g A grou p of peopl e bus t u p laughing. A girl gasps a t a n term yo u develop all of your ow n material. Thi s will save you the impressive routine , an d peopl e nearb y loo k ove r t o see embarrassment of running a routine on a set wh o has already hear wha t i s goin g on . Ar e yo u th e observer whe n thes e thing d it before, which is a possibility in this day an d age.Usually the s happen , o r th e observed? best material is delivered from the heart. In the lon g ru n The Protection Shield your personality-conveying routines will be the mos t Ther e are man y shielding strategies wome n use. Her e are some congruent if they come from your ow n life. (That having been of them: said, th e ability to congruently deliver someon e else's material is is the illusion that's created that they are participating. He then still an important skill.) cuts the girls off an d re-asserts control of the conversation so that Proper Delivery of Material he can lead it to the next morse l of value, baiting the girls into It is an under-appreciated fact that the delivery of canned material further illusory participation, and so the process repeats. This is often mor e important than the content. Wome n have a finely- "lead, bait and chase9' cycle is also an illustration of toned intuition for the subtle behaviors of a ma n with high S an d the entire Attract phase of the Mystery Method. R value his eye contact, ton e of voice, bod y language, an d so The Cologne Opener by Style on.Th e use of canne d material allows you to somewhat automate Style: "Hey guys, I want your opinion on something. See, I th e verbal aspects of the interaction, so that yo u have mor e have two different colognes on my wrists, and I want to see which of an opportunity to practice the delivery. Onc e this improve d one you like better."(Let them smell the cologne. Be cocky and delivery has been internalized, eve n your natural, spontaneous funny, neg the target, etc.) conversations will benefit. Your delivery itself will become Style: "The reason is, I have so many colognes from my ex- a demonstration of higher value. girlfriends on my shelf, and I want to give some of them away and Expressiveness keep the best ones." Many beginners are no t as expressive as they nee d to be Variation #1 :After she picks one, you pull out a pen and make a with their facial expressions and vocal tonality. Du e to this, if mark on your wrist, next to five or ten others... they were to increase their level of expressiveness to where it Variation #2:Her: "So what are they?" Style: This one is hemlock, actually needs to be, it would feel as if it's to o much. This feeling this one is chloroform." can be deceptive.It's better to be mor e expressive in the Variation #3:Style: "Thanks. I have all these old colognes beginning, even whe n it feels like to o much. Yo u can always around the house, so I'm having a face off. This one has won ten calibrate your energy back dow n later, over weeks or month s days in a row!" of practice. Tonality and Pacing More on Energy Levels Th e quality of your voice is extremely important. Althoug h Gamin g with a higher energy level makes it easier to hoo k sets. In no proble m is insurmountable, certain vocal qualities are fact, beginners can becom e addicted to the powerful responses preferable to others . Some important points: they can generate by runnin g game with emotionally expressive Hav e a deep , powerful voic e that conie s from your vocal tonality and facial expressions. Of course, a well-rounded diaphragm .If you have any issues with an accent that is venusian artist should be capable of hookin g sets at lower energy considered unattractive,(you kno w wh o you are) get a voice levels as well.When first opening a set , it's important to coach an d have the problem fixed. come in at an energy level slightly highe r than that of the Be emotionall y expressive wit h your voice . It may be set. If you come in at lower energy than is already in the useful to take classes on acting and improvisational comedy. set, you are only going int o their set to bring the m down. This is Speak slowl y an d clearly. Eliminate 'uh,' 'like,' and ' yo u no t wha t they are interested in. know' from your vocabulary. If your energy is to o low, sets will no t hook . If your energy is to o Speak. Wit h plenty. Of pausing . Create.. .a certain rhythm. . high, sets will easily hoo k but closing will be mor e difficult, an d .to the way.. .that you speak. This will rivet attention to your words girls will mor e often accuse you of being gay. Bu t whe n you ope n Speak loudly. Wome n are programme d to automatically with the right energy level, sets will hoo k an d lead to solid closes respon d to a ma n with a louder voice. This doesn't mea n that muc h mor e consistently. Only time in the field will give you the you should lack social discretion an d talk loudly all the time - bu t calibration to kno w exactly ho w muc h energy is appropriate for recognize that it is a useful too l at your disposal, especially in each set. louder venues. This will make yo u come across as "mor e alpha." Opinion Openers These are all very easy to field-test. Ope n ten sets with a loud Th e main purpos e of the opener is to ge t her attention an d raise voice, using plenty of pausing, an d then ope n te n sets with a her interest in a chat. It is no t a time to hit on her. It is no t a time quiet voice an d no pausing. Th e difference in respons e is to introduce yourself. It is no t a time to complimen t her or spend striking. The field does not lie, mone y on her.Although there are many different kinds of Th e Pictur e Opene r b y Mystery effective openers , the Mystery Metho d tends to focus on "Hi . Could you do me a favor?" Wai t for her t o respond . The y indirect openers.On e form of indirect opene r is the opinion wil l usually think yo u are hitting o n the m a t whic h poin t yo u opener, credited to Style. Possibly the mos t commonl y used pull out your digita l camer a an d say:"Could yo u take a picture of form of opener ; it is easy an d effective. Withou t further ado, here my friend an d I?" is the mos t popular opinion opene r of all time: Thi s i s a good , subtl e neg . A s yo u han d her the The Jealous Girlfriend Opener by Style camera , giv e her a playful additional ne g b y saying: "Hey guys, we're doing a poll...Would you date someone that's still "Yo u of course do kno w ho w to use a camera ... yes?" friends with his ex-girlfriend?"(Girls talk for a bit, then you cut Body language them off.) When you first run your opener, don' t face the set with "Ok I've only got a minute...actually this is a two-part your body. In othe r words, your hea d may be turned towards question....My friend Dave has been dating this girl for a couple the set as you address them , bu t the rest of your body should no months, but he's still friends with his girlfriend from college. What t be.Yo u can tell a lo t just by wher e someone' s feet are pointing. do you guys think about that?"(Girls ask how close they still are, If on e came across as report-seeking during the opener, the set then you cut them off.) would perceive it as a low-value behavior. They would the n treat hi "Well he still talks to her on the phone, and he's still got this m like a low-value guy and blow hi m ou t of the set.Field-testing shoebox with letters.. .pictures.. .what do you guys think about has shown us that the percentage of sets that ope n successfully that?"---(Girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off.) is drastically affected by this on e factor.Ther e are two commo n "Well get this, she told him that he needs to stop talking to the girl, openin g scenarios wort h mentioning at this time. and he needs to burn the box.."----(Girls talk excitedly about In the first, you are simply walking by the set "on your way back to topic.) your friends." As yo u pass the target set, you stop, turn your hea "Oh my god, listen to you guys, this is just like watching The View." d towards them, and ru n your opener. As the opene r hooks , you (Transition into your next routine.) can then turn the rest of your body towards the set an d continue. Th e first interesting thing abou t this opene r is that he isn't In the second scenario, you are already in a set, adjacent to the seeking rappor t with the girls or trying to impress them. He' s no t target group . This gives yo u social proo f At the right time, being needy, or rud e or overly nice. He' s completely neutral an d simply lean back towards the target grou p and, over your indirect. He' s just taking a poll wit h his friends. He could have shoulder, ru n an opener. As before, whe n they start to hook asked anyone it just happened to be her. He doesn't even see , yo u can tur n your body towards them . the girls as sexual beings, referring to the m as guys instead of Calibrate! girls or ladies. Usually a girl will turn he r bod y in to face yo u as she hook s to Next , he adds value to the conversation by giving the m a piece of your material. Whe n she doe s this, you should the n turn juicy drama on which to opine. The y find this interesting an d your body towards her as well.(Reward he r for goo d behavior.) give hi m their attention as they chatter abou t the situation laid If you do this prematurely, yo u will come across as needy or over- ou t in th e opener. Their girly-girl reaction gives hi m an eager. Feel the calibration flow.Within the first thirty to sixty opportunity to tease them .Finally, the opene r reveals a seconds of runnin g the opener, your body should be facing the communicatio n cycle where he takes control, adds value, and set an d they should be facing you. Yo u can't ru n the set over then uses that value as bait to get the girls invested your shoulder, bu t yo u should ope n it that way. in the interaction then the cycle repeats. Th e girls' specific Lean Back input is no t necessary at all to run the opener; what's important Th e next time yo u are in a social situation, look around the roo m conversation as soon as possible, then laughing at them behind an d take stock of the various conversations that are ongoing. their back. In a given conversation, notice ho w one perso n may be leaning I remember the opener suddenly appearing in the community like a in, while the othe r person is leaning back. See ho w clearly it year and a half ago, and can't remember who made it up, though I seems that the person leaning back has mor e power, and think it was a workshop student. And it is a great opener to learn, the perso n leaning in has less.whe n yo u lean in, you are because it's so short.The problem is, it's imperfect and incomplete. conveying to he r that she is mor e important to you than yo u are There's a subtlety to any opinion opener: There must be a reason to her. Again, this tells he r that yo u are lower value than she is. A why you're asking it In other words, you can't just walk up to a subtlety like this is often the critical factor in losing a set. group and ask a random question for no purpose. It's weird. You Many beginners engage in pecking, whic h is the act of leaning in need to root it in the time and place. For example, when I use the every time you say something. Do no t do this! He r emotional jealous girlfriend opener, I mention that I'm asking because I just circuitry will infor m her that yo u are no t a ma n of high survival got a phone call from my brother about it or "we were trying to and replication value, an d she will stop responding to you. give my friend over there advice." When I do the spells routine, Th e 'Who Lies More'Opener by Mad Dash I say it's about "my friend Will, who isn't out with us tonight ilHey guys, quick question...Who lies more...men or women?" because he's with this girl." You must roof your opener to make it a ---(Girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off.) valid reason to approach a group. "Ok, I can only stay a sec, my friends are waiting, but who cheats Maybe some people who use Who Lies More actually give it a more, guys or girls?"(Girls talk for a bit, then you cut them off.) context, but no one I've heard. So if you are going to continue to "I was waiting to get a haircut a few weeks ago, reading one use this opener, you must modify it, or find a new one. Examples of of those women's magazines, and it says that girls lie more and roots for the Who Lies More opener include: cheat more...is that true??"---(Girls talk about topic. Go into your "I was reading Esquire today and they did this study, and guess next routine.) what the results were? My friends and I have been debating about Incongruence it all day. We disagree." OR, Have you ever tried to use another person' s personality- "My friend over there just broke up with his girlfriend because she conveying routine, only to have it come ou t of your mout h like a kept lying to him about little things. And we thought it was funny, bad script?Whe n wha t you say an d ho w yo u say it don' t because guys are the ones who have the reputation for lying. But matc h up in a natural manner, you hav e wha t we call now he thinks women are worse. So we're trying to save him from incongruence.To get a woma n interested in you, yo u mus t be being bitter about women for the rest of his life. Only you can help interesting. Tha t is wh y venusian artists share stories and save him from ending up a lonely,miserable old man, eating dog routines. What one man can do, another man can do. Some have food in a studio apartment downtown." suggested that you should "just be yourself" an d no t use These are just random roots I've put into the opener, off the top of interesting, field- tested and prove n material. Bu t this my head. I'll field test them and, in the meantime, if anyone field material creates the opportunity to get valuable practice in tests a rooted version of Who Lies More and it works as solidly as the field, building calibration, while having something everything else, please let me know. Let's complete this opener so interesting to say. that everyone can start using it correctly and effectively. Like a comedian, a pickup artist is also a performing artist. A picku False Tim e Constraint s p artist's task is to captivate a small group of people lon g Whe n you first ope n a set, you haven't yet ha d muc h time to enough to convey specific personality characteristics whic h build value, an d thus you are nearly indistinguishable from ultimately make hi m interesting to the on e woma n in the grou p every other loser guy. A girl might think, Oh great, how long is that he has his eye on.Th e material he run s is like a vehicle that this guy going to be here? Am I going to have to go dance, or go to he uses to convey his personality to the grou p an d obliquely, to the bathroom, or go buy a drink, so that I can get rid of this guy? her. Whe n a comedia n tells a joke, peopl e say, "That' s a goo d This is no t a useful frame of min d for he r to be in. Bu t it is joke." Bu t whe n he strings several goo d jokes together, people possible to inoculate he r min d against such thoughts. Yo u ca n say "he's hilarious." It is no longer the matenal that takes the create the illusion in he r min d that yo u are fust leaving anyway. acclaim, bu t the comedian himself.Picture this. An amateur She should always have this feeling like yo u are abou t to leave. comedian is hanging ou t with friends an d accidentally tells a On e way of creating this impression is to use false time funny joke during conversation, generating a great response. He constraints. This technique was first popularized by Style. A few thinks to himself, "Man , that was funny; I' m goin g to pu t that in examples: my comed y act." So a few days later, he does - only the comed y * "You kno w what...if I didn' t have to go right now routine falls flat. He thinks to himself,"Whe n I said it to my which Ido...I would..." friends, they really cracked up . It mus t be the audience." * "I ca n only stay a sec, I' m her e wit h friends, so So the next week he throws the joke int o his act again, an d again chec k this out..." it tails to make the audience laugh. He thinks, "Hmm , wh y didn't * "I'v e only got a minute , so I'v e got to tell you about... " this work? Is it the material, or the audience that's to blame?" After you deliver the first few word s of your opener, use a false He decides to try the material ou t one mor e time the following time constraint. The n onc e you reac h the Hoo k Point, try week and again, the routine tails to make people laugh. He' s ha d delivering another false time constraint. Why? Because the set enough he drop s the routine entirely. has no w decided that they want you to stay. A false time No w let's look at wha t a professional comedian does. Yo u constraint at this momen t will create a fear of loss. Thu s see, it is the professional wh o knows that reciting a joke begins the cycle of baiting the target to chase. only three times in front of an audience is simply no t enough. Body Rocking He know s he mus t practice telling the joke again and again in Body rockin g is the use of physical movemen t to create the front of a live audience to systematically build back the impression that yo u are just leaving. In othe r words, it's a non- natural timing that the jok e ha d the first time he told it to his verbal false time constraint. friends. This is one of those tilings that can be difficult to describe in Th e ba d news is that every ne w routine that yo u learn mus text, bu t easy to teach in seminar. Suffice to say that if th e set t go throug h this naturalization phase. It may take a goo d tw o continually feels like you are about to leave, based purely on doze n times until the scripted routine comes ou t congruently. your body language, then you are probably doing it right Th e goo d new s is, whe n you're doing a doze n It's no t goo d to have a lot of extra motio n while you are in set. approaches a night, you'll have a totally natural routine in the Some beginners have a proble m with bouncing around or can in only two nights.If you add a ne w routine to your gam e fidgeting while in set. Beware: usually this sort of motio n is on a weekly basis, you'll soo n have a whole list of routines in unconscious, an d is an expression of nervous energy. Without the can whe n yo u really nee d them. Ther e will come a time in a faithful wing to poin t this out , you ma y no t even realize you your near future that you will be given an opportunity to attract are doing it. Movemen t like this can wreck an otherwise perfectly a woma n of particular quality. Are you ready for the challenge? goo d set.Th e person wh o moves the least (i.e. th e perso n wh o Do you hav e enoug h material naturalized an d ready to go, so you reacts the least) will often be perceived as the one with mor e can attract her with congruence? social status. If yo u are no t movin g for a calculated reason, The Problem with the 'Who Lies More' Opener by Style such as for performing body rocking, the n it is better to stay in one Whenever I'm winging workshops, and I go around the room and spot with comfortable bod y language. Avoid fidgeting at all was guys what opener they use, half of them say, "Who lies more, costs. men or women?" And then I see them go out and use it that night, How to Open Seated Set s and half the women usually respond by either by asking, "Why are Upo n first openin g a seated set, everything seems fine. Th e you asking us this?" or "Are you taking a survey or something." Or venusian artist stands near the set runnin g material that is by just giving them bad body language and trying to end the apparently well-received. Bu t as time passes, he begins to lose What most people do wrong whe n approaching by Style their attention. Wher e did he go wrong? When I went out the first night on Mystery's workshop, I tried an In standing, while the rest of the set is seated, he has less physical experiment. I approached a set, opened, and then DHV'd. comfort than they do . This betrays a subtext that the set is mor e [Demonstration of higher value.] And not a single set stuck. I didn't important to hi m than he is to them. Thus , as time passes reach the hook point. Everything seemed sort of flat, until I finally they will perceive hi m as having lower an d lower value. A just excused myself. high-value male doesn't pu t himself in uncomfortable situations so This happened because I had dropped two important pieces that he can seek rappor t with others. out of my game. If you know what they are already, then you are Th e problem is, you canno t simply approac h a seated set an d obviously already successful in the field.The next day, I did the join the m at their table. To do so woul d be try-hard. So wha t is a exact same thing, except I added Negs and Time Constraints to the field-tested metho d for opening a seated set? approach. Everything flew open. I was pulling girls off of guys left 1) Ope n th e set with an opinion opener (as you would for a and right.So, if you are approaching, but not having success getting standing set.) in with the set, go out tonight and add negs and time constraints to 2) Part of the way into the opener , use a false time constraint the first three minutes of your approach. It makes a huge 3) Continu e the opene r as yo u gra b a chair an d sit dow n with difference. the set.It's important to be talking at the same time that you sit For those who don't have this material, here's an example: down. TIME CONSTRAINT: I can only stay for a minute, because I have 4) Ru n another false time constraint an d then go into another to rejoin my friends over there. routine. NEG : Oh my God, is she always like that? How do you roll with 5) Continue the set as normal. her? Kee p in min d that simply knowing th e steps is no t enough. And, a third point, which I've made often. In order for an approach It takes repetitive practice in the field to tighten up your to work in a bar or club, you must enter the set with an energy/fun calibration. Often it isn't the techniques themselves, but the level equal to or slightly greater than its current energy level. If natural manner in which they are executed that gets you walk in not smiling, talking softly, and with bad body the results.Alternate wordin g for th e 'Jealous Girlfriend9 language, you're going to get blown out, no matter what you say Opener : Style: Hey guys, let me get your opinion on something. right. I'm trying to give my friend over there advice, but we're just a Hope this helps some people... bunch of guys and not qualified to comment on these matters. Chapter Four Revie w Girls: What?Style: Okay, I've only got a sec. See Wing over there? A1 begins when you run an opener. Well, he has been dating a girl for three months. And she just A1 is complete when you reach the Social Hook Point. This is moved in with him. Now, this is a two part question. So, imagine the moment when the set ceases to wonder when you will leave, you've been dating someone for three months. And he is still and instead hopes that you will stay. friends with his old girlfriend from college. How do you feel about The meeting location is a target rich that?Girls: blah blah blah are they just friends blah blah blah environment where the venusian artist visits in order to Style: Yes, they're just friends. There's nothing else going on. They practice his game. This is also known as a field. talk like once a week at most. Women will often use proximity to signal their Girls: I think its fine /I don't think they should be talking /whatever receptiveness to an approach. They may not be consciously (At this point, Style has been body rocking out of the set. Now he aware mat they are doing this. rocks back in to continue the opener.) Although proximity and other approach invitations Style: Okay, now let's say that he has a drawer in his apartment. are opportunities to be capitalized on, a skilled pickup-artist can And in that drawer he keeps all of his old photographs and letters. consistently open sets without waiting for these signals. Now, some of those letters happen to be from ex's and some of the The 3-Second Rule states that upon entering the field, you photographs happen to be with ex's. must open a set within three seconds. Also, if you are later not in Girls: blah blah blah concerned comment blah blah question a set, and you see one, men you must open it within three Style: It's not like he ever looks at them. They are just there, like seconds. Following this rule will give you more Social Proof, old souvenirs and memories of his past. which affects how people respond to you. Girls: I think its fine / I think he should put them away in a closet / You can create negative social proof with certain behaviors. He should destroy them / whatever Such as: standing against the wall with your drink against your Style: Okay, the reason I'm asking is because Wing's girlfriend chest, standing in a group of guys, circling the venue in a predatory says she doesn't want him to talk to his ex from college at all. She fashion, looking around the venue with a serious wants him to cut it off completely. And she wants him to destroy all expression on your face, etc. of his old photos and letters from ex's. She says it's just holding Don't try to look 'cool' or "tough/ It's better to be comfortable onto the past, and he should let go of it now. Personally, I thought and friendly. it was extreme and a bit insecure. But what do I know. I'm a guy. Don't drink. And, as we all know, guys think differently from girls... It's normal to need two or three warm-up The 'Two Girls Fighting Outside' Opener approaches at the beginning of the night. Mystery: Oh my go d did you guys see that girl fight outside? Try to approach sets that have men, and practice gaming them Girls: (whatever - Cut the m off after the y talk for a bit) as well. Women have a 'leader of men' attraction switch. Mystery: The y were totally fighting ove r this funny guy. Hav e Women have various Protection Shield Strategies, you guys ever fought over a guy? " Girls: (whatever - Cut the m which they use to screen out men. But a venusian artist can off)Mystery: It was a short little guy name d George. Sort of coax a woman into lowering her shield by conveying white trash, in a wife beater.. .These girls were pulling each other s disinterest while demonstrating value. hair.. .one was poundin g the others head into the ground. . .On e The Mystery Method makes use of canned material, of her boob s poppe d out Normally I' m all for seeing boobs which can generate consistent responses. You should create , bu t this was a gross, white-trash boob." a routine stack in order to practice this skill. (Mak e a grossed-ou t facial expressio n an d transition to you r nex The natural delivery of the material, including body t routine.) language, facial expressions, and vocal tonality, is more How to Open Moving Set s important than the content itself. Some girls are walking throug h the venue . Is your game stron g The Mystery Method makes use of indirect openers enoug h to sto p the m with your opener ? because they do not telegraph interest, and are proven in the field It is extremely difficult to consistently ope n moving sets. Th to open consistently. Other types of openers can also be e mos t important principle to remembe r is that the girls should quite effective, such as direct openers. Experiment and field- never perceive that yo u are chasing after them. If they do , then test your ideas. you will com e across as having lower value, and they will leave. The use of new material in the field can feel clumsy and On e way to avoid this is to remain firmly roote d to the groun d incongruent. Only through a couple days of in-field practice whe n opening.Alternately, consider that an object in motion tends can the new material become naturalized. to remain in motion. Her e is theMystery Metho d technique for An opener must have a root, which is anything that gives it opening movin g sets: situational relevance. 1) Yo u mus t be walking along the same trajectory as the set, A false time constraint allows the venusian artist to slightly in front of them. create the illusion that he is just leaving. This is a powerful tool for 2) Tur n your head back towards the set an d ru n an opener. opening consistently. 3) Continue walking beside the set, an d continue gaming Body rocking is the use of body language to deliver a false the set as normal. time constraint. When opening a seated set, it is important to sit with them She laughs while talking to you soon after starting the opener. Use a false-time constraint She reinitiates conversation when you stop talking and then continue talking as you sit down. She touches you When opening a moving set, it is important that they not She tries to get rapport and build comfort with you perceive you as chasing after them in any way. Sometimes an IO I isn't whe n she does something, but rather whe Chapter 5 n she doesn't do something. Thes e are called Passive IOIs. A2 : Female-to-Male Interes t Passive IOI s are very important because often they are the Demonstrating value, Indicators of interest, and Group Theory only IOI s yo u will get. Her e are a few examples: Now that the set is open, it's tim e to create attraction. First, He r friend goes to the bathroom , bu t she stays yo u mus t pick a target from the set. Mayb e there are several He r friends go to the bar, or the dance floor bu t she stays pretty girls and your decision is somewhat arbitrary, bu t you still She waits for yo u if yo u go to the bathroo m must choos e on e so that yo u ca n neg her.As yo u She doesn't flinch or pull back if you happe n to mov e to o demonstrate higher value (DHV) to the set, an d neg close the target, attraction is created. She will respond with She doesn't resist whe n you escalate physically (or she gives indicators of interest (IOIs), which will help yo u to gauge your token resistance to avoid feeling like a slut.) progress. Thi s is the essence of the A2 phase. Indicators of nterest Fake IOIs (I0Is) Be warned that girls will occasionally use IOI s to 'lie' to you. Fo r Whe n a girl become s attracted to someone , she will begin to example, a girl might give you IOI s while she is asking you to buy give indicators of interest. These can be fairly easy to spot, and are her a drink. She's no t attracted to you, bu t merely manipulating useful as a gauge of her internal state. Although sometimes the girl you. An d of course, if you are easily manipulated, she will find you is deliberately trying to give yo u a hint, many times whe n she less attractive. She might give you IOI s just to keep you aroun d gives IOIs , she is no t even consciously aware of wha t she as free entertainment.A girl might give you IOI s whe n she is is doing.It is useful to not e that we often give IOI s ditching you. Fo r example, whe n she says"W e have to go to the unconsciously as well. Bu t with practice, we becom e bathroo m now, " some tiny part of her knows that she is really desensitized to the presence of beautiful women , an d avoid this ditching you , so she might touc h yo u on the arm as she says problem.Her e ar e som e IOI ' s . Notic e tha t som e o f thes good-bye, to give you some validation.A girl will also give IOI s e requir e mor e attractio n tha n others . Fo r example , sh e sometimes just to see it she can get yo u to return them . If yo u migh t b e attracte d enoug h t o as k yo u you r name , bu t return he r IOI s too easily, without making her wor k for it, you no t enoug h t o leave th e venu e wit h yo u an d bounce . have just become another notc h on he r belt. Don' t jum p on he r She reinitiates conversation whe n you stop talking She and start humpin g he r leg like a horn y little pupp y dog. giggles Indicators of Disinterest (lODs) She touches you Similarly, there are Indicators oiDisinterest , also know n as She looks back an d glances at you repeatedly IODs. Her e are a few examples of these: every minute or so Avoidance- She avoids eve contact. She avoids your calls. She tosses he r hair (to see if you will look) She avoids you in general. If eye contact happen s from a distance, she holds it for a If she can pretend that she didn't hear what you just said, second she will. She smiles at you She won't contribute to the conversation. She stands nearby (proximity) She gets impatient easily. She interrupts you r conversation from nearby, or laughs She walks away or looks away. at something you said She leans away, turns her back. or talks to someone else. While walking by, she turns he r body towards you or She is non-responsive, or she repetitively says "uh-huh " brushes against you instead of giving you a real response. She says something to he r friend the n they She won't mov e with you, even two feet away. She won't invest. both giggle Practicing A1 mid A2 will give you the skill set to turn She asks you for a light, or the time, or in any way initiates those IODs into IOIs. Th e answer is no t to tell he r that she is a conversation hot, or offer to buy he r a drink, or be really persistent, or ask While you're talking to her group, she is particularly her lots of questions. Instead, practice Al being indirect an talkative (to get your attention) d not-needy, and practice A2 negging and demonstrating She asks you for your nam e higher value. Voila! IOIs .Fo r those wh o have seen the movie She asks you your age [make he r guess] The Tao of Steve, Al an d A2 happe n to correspond to the first She compliments you two rules in th e movie: be desire/ess, an d be excellent. An d She is playful and tries to challenge you speaking of being excellent, here is an excellent DHV : She's disagreeing but laughing Nam e Mnemonic s By Style She's punching your ar m bu t laughing Girl: What's your name? Style: I'm Style. Girl: I'm Janet. This is She uses nicknames for you Donna. And that's Tony.Style: Okay...Janet, Donna, Tony. You She plays with he r hair while talking to you know, I used to be really bad with names. Whe n sitting next to you her leg touches yours Girls: Omigod, I'm so bad with names. She repeatedly touche s you in any way Style: But you don't have to be anymore. Here, I'll show you in two She asks if you hav e a girlfriend seconds. All I do when I'm introduced to you is make a picture in She mentions you r girlfriend without knowing if you my head. So if you're Janet, I picture you with the head of Janet actually have on e from Three's Company. No offense. And for Donna, I just picture Whe n she has to go to the bathroom , she comes back like the dawn, and the sun rising over your head. And for Tony, I She holds eye contact whe n she speaks with yo u for longer see you on the front of a box of Frosted Flakes. Now I'll never periods of time forget your names. She avoids mentioning her boyfriend Neg Theor y If it comes up that you like something, she mentions that [From Mystery's Loung e Mystery's classic Ne g Theor y article.] she likes it to o or needs someon e t o show he r ho w A hot girl is there, surrounded by her friends. She has put on this Whe n she says or does something, she looks at you bitch act. But is she really a bitch? Unlikely. All my girlfriends to see your reaction were wonderful human beings. Beautiful people have it easier She looks at you from the side, to hide the fact that she's because they are beautiful and often times have better looking upbringings because of it.But - she needs to have a standard when She introduces yo u to friends all these loser guys approach her. So her values are very honed She buys you a drink and understood. When a man walks up and says, "Can I buy you a She calls you a player or a heartbreaker beer" this will annoy her. While the guy thinks he's doing On her way out, she re-approaches to tell yo u that she is something nice for her, she gets this constantly and is desensitized leaving [get her number] to it. You are the eighth guy today! So she is very good at brushing On your way out, she asks you wher e you are going [invite all these guys off. She has to be... she isn't going to sleep with all her] of them! So she may say 'no,' act annoyed, or use some other She returns your calls shielding mechanism, and then the poor guy thinks she's a bitch She invents reasons to be near you, interact with you, or have and he walks off angry and feeling like a failure. And that seems to isolation with yo u work. Sometimes when the girl is particularly feeling powerful (like Th e mos t importan t IOI s are: when she's in a club) she will accept the beer and then flake the guy off. Hey, the guys are stupid enough to buy her one; she might things about her(not her looks.) There is a mutual respect now - as well take it. Something most guys never get from the girl. When she accepts a beer from you, the girl is really saying, "I don't This is how you remove a protection shield. Three negs ought to do know you and I don't care about you. You are just another one of it within two of three minutes of neutral chat. Once it is removed, those typical guys and since I don't respect you, I'll take the beer you can, from a place of mutual respect, seduce her. from you before I snub you."Since hot girls are so good at snubbing Sample Negs your approach, snubbing them is important. You cannot YOU : "I don' t think we should get to kno w each other." HER insult them, because they are accustomed to all the hurt "Why not? "YOU : "I thin k you are just too muc h of a nice girl for guys insulting them ("You are nothing but a bitch!") so this rolls off me." their back like water off a muskrats ass.How do you snub them If your target says something even slightly rude you say, "You without insulting them? Well, let's say she has long nails, don' t get out muc h d o you?" which are most likely fake. Now why do women dress so fine if If a girl isn't int o anything active, use that as an opportunity to they don't want the attention? Sometimes they love the neg he r bysaying, "Ge t with the program. I'm int o living life. Don' feeling of control. They are in a club with friends and they want to t you care abou t staying fit? just cause you are thin doesn't mea n be the leader of their social circle and get all the attention. The you are tone d you know. Yo u have to consciously plan activities. guys come and buy drinks for them and she gets a kick out of That's it... I' m your success coach ... and we aregoing roller- knocking the guys down. It's all in a days play. So, she is wearing blading (or rock climbing) this week." fake nails to look even better! Most guys will say, "Wow you are so If your target interrupts you, say, "Hello, I' m talking, geez" or, beautiful!" Boring, typical and in her mind by now, true (after "Excuse me... may I finish my sentence first?" Yo u then say to years of this.) others in the group , "Is she always like that?" Imagine now, a guy comes along and says "Nice nails. Are they If you are asking a question to two wome n and the target real?" She will have to concede, "No, acrylic." And he says (like he answers you say, "Ididn't ask you. silly." didn't notice it was a put down),"Oh. (pause) well I guess they still If you pull out your photos for the photo routine, first show look good." Then he turns his back to her.What does this do to her? them to the obstacle. When the target tries to see them, say, Well, he didn't treat her like shit and insult her. Instead, he "Excuse me! I'm showing her the pictures not you. Wait your turn complimented her, but the result was to target her insecurity. She geez." thinks,"I'm hot I'm beautiful" - (especially in her current emotional If a girl kisses you on the cheek and goes to kiss your other cheek, state of control) - "but I didn't win this guy over. I'm so tell her, "Only one ... don't be greedy." good at this... I'll just fix that little smear on my image that he If she says, "Yes, but I'm French", you reply, "Are allFrench girls as has of me." greedy as you?" Then you continue to show disinterest in her looks as you give her "That's a nice hairstyle ... it that your real hair?" Smile and look at a neutral topic like the Elvis bit. During this time, her intention is to her to show her you are sincerely being funny and no t insulting. get you to become like all the other guys so she can feel in control HER: "Oh, I'm a model."YOU: "What, like a hand model or and snub you. Then you give her another Neg like this: "Is that a something?""Ewww, your palms are sweaty ... ewwww!!!!! Where hair piece? Well, it's neat... what do you call this hairstyle? The haye your hands been? No . don't tell me, I do notwant to know!" waffle?" Smile and look at her to show her you are sincerely being "You've got something in your ear." funny and not insulting. You are pleasant but disinterested in her YOU: "Ooh, check this out... . watch this. Here, pull my finger. This beauty. This will intrigue her because she knows guys. And this is good."[Your target pulls your finger.] isn't normal. You must have really high taste, or be used to girls, or YOU: [Make a fart sound with your lips.] "Oh man!!! be married or something. These questions make her curious. So You actually pulled my finger! haaa! No , no jus' kidding, here, this keeps happening and is known as flirting. She gives you little really, pull on my ringer. No honest this is good trust me. " [She negs and these tests are qualifiers. You pass them by negging her pulls it - Fart soundagain.] "O h man!!! That's TWICE!!! I can't back. After all, you aren't like the others showing interest. But... believe you! My niece is six and doesn't fall for that anymore! man why not? haaa!" To get control again, she says, "Will you buy me a drink?" Notice You may decide to say, "I'm just kidding. Here really.I'll show you how she is trying to get you now! But, she only wants to sucker some magic. Look at this. My hand is empty right? Ok, really pull you in enough so she can snub you. That is all she is about - this my finger. No really, I promise I won't fart again. Serious. I swear strategy is all she knows and it's not working on you so she is to you. Magician's honour! No , swear. I promise I won't." She trying to do damage control on the situation. But at the same time pulls your finger. [Fart Sound.] "Oh my Go d you can get talked she doesn't quite understand why you don't think she's"all that." into anything!" After all, her nails are fake.You say, "Ah, that's so funny ... your "I like that dress. I remember seeing you at a club before and you nose wiggles when you speak " - (pointing and being cute) - were wearing the same dress.l t is nice though." :-) "look there it goes again . . . it's so. . . quaint . . . hheeeee look." "My you come on strong. That isn't 'til later in the relationship." She'll say, "Ann, stoppp!" :) *blush*. Now she is self-conscious and "You need to wash that dress already!" this is where you want her. You have, with three negs, successfully "Very good. That is a little test I do to see if you created interest(curiosity) and removed her from her pedestal have any free thought of your own or just believe everything you (removed her protection shield.) You were humorous, you had a hear.""Wow. You really wrecked a moment! Your past boyfriends smile, you dress well, you are confident and everything she would must have really hated that about you." want in a man. HER: "I'm a model."YOU: "Do a lot of people ask you if you are a You didn't take her shit. Oh... and when she asked you for a beer, model?"HER: "Yes, all the time."YOU: "I think they were just being you said, "No. I don't buy girls drinks. But you can buy me one." polite." You are qualifying her now. If she buys you a beer, this is "I just noticed.. .your nose moves when youspeak... haaaa, it's so symbolic of her respect for you.If not, you say, "Pleasure cute." (Pointing and being cute.) "Look there it goes again ... it's meeting you" [not sarcastically] and turn your back to her so ...quaint... heee looky" again. Don't walk away, just turn your back. You are negging her YOU take a gum out and offer it to the target. HER: "No thanks. I' again just when she thought she was negging you. You are teasing m drinking beer."YOU: "I know. Take the gum." each other. It's flirting - this is all textbook psychology. If She's Older A neg is a qualifier. The girl is failing to meet your high If your target says, "You are so young", this is anIOI . Don' t expectations. It's not an insult, just a judgment call on your part. excuse yourself for being young like chumps do only someone You're not even trying to make her feel bad (so it seems.) It's the trying to get the girl would do that. Simply reply cynically, "Yeah I same as if you pulled out a tissue and blew your nose. There's noticed ... poor you." Remember to convey your playful teasing nothing insulting about blowing your nose. You haven't attitude. explicitly rejected her. But at the same time, she will sincerely "Take a quiet moment to get over this age thing. I'll wait." believe that you aren't trying to impress her. This creates curiosity Types of Negs and makes you a challenge. Th e first sort of ne g is the shotgun neg, which is an The better looking the girl, the more aggressive you must be with innocuou s statement that would only be uttered by a using negs. A 10 can get three negs up front, while an 8 gets only sincerely disinterested person. It's an indicator of disinterest. one or two over a longer time. You can go overboard if she thinks Of course, it's no t that yo u dislike her; no t at all. It's just you are better than her (which happens more often that you'd that yo u hadn' t considered he r a potential romantic or think.) You can drop the self-esteem right out from under her, just sexual partner. This IO D diminishes he r sexual powe r an d like most 10s do to guys, and this isn't good. You have to get as disarms her peer group. Th e power of the shotgun ne g is in close to the breaking point as you can without crossing the line. its apparent sincerity. She'll honestly believe that you aren't Once you have gotten her right there, you can start appreciating trying to impress her. Then she wonders why... Th e simplest example of this is pulling ou t a tissue an d blowing selection, whic h is a DHV . When girls see that other girls have your nose. She'll sincerely believe that you aren't trying to impress pre-selected you, they feel mor e attracted to you as a result. her; (otherwise you would never blow your nos e in front of her.) If a woma n discovers that you have a lot of money, it is a DHV . It won' t even occur to he r that it's really just a ruse. Shotgun She will find you mor e attractive, all other factors being the same. negs are useful for conveying a not-needy attitude which is Bu t if she perceives that you are trying to impress her with your a demonstration of higher value. Thu s in on e stroke yo u indicate money, she will then lose attraction. This is because only lower- disinterest, disarm obstacles, an d create attraction. "Nice nails, are value people try to impress such behavior is know n they real?" as a demonstration of LOWER value, or DLV. If you are Contrast this wit h the tease neg. Teasing conveys a cocky, trying to impress, yo u must be of lower status an d thus playful attitude. It's no t perceived as inadvertent, bu t rather as unattractive.If a woma n sees that you have a lot of social proof deliberate flirting (but don e properly.) Examples of this are "pull from gaming he room , she will feel more attracted to you, because my finger," "You can dress her up, but you can't take her social proo f is a DHV . If, however, she sees that you are socially anywhere," 'Don't make me come down there," etc.Whe n yo u unaware and inept, the n it is a DLV. Whe n yo u DLV , it lowers call he r a dork, your cocky, playful, fun attitude shows he r perception of your S and R value, which makes he r feel confidence, takes charge, an d makes tilings fun. Teasing timulates emotionally less attracted.Telling stories tha t are fun, her emotions and is useful as a DH V during A2 . She ma y non- interesting, and emotionally relevant, demonstrates social skill, respond (IOD) to this tactic if she is trying to freeze you out. whic h is a DHV . A story can also be structured to convey Anothe r form of neg is the sniper neg. An example of this is specific characteristics in the subtext, allowing yo u to hinting to he r that she has a booger, eye crusties, a sweat}" surreptitiously flip attraction switches.Negging is also a DHV , palm, or that she just spit on you. Th e idea is to make he r because only a high value guy would talk to her like that, and seem honestly believe that she has performed a demonstration of sincere. Yo u mus t already hav e girls if you talk in such a way. lower value (DLV). This makes her self-conscious an d creates Some DHVs : a situation wher e she is the one wonderin g whether or no t you o Pre-selection from other wome n o Leader of me n have a goo d impression of her.Yo u can follow this up by o Supporter and protector of thos e close to you looking away, or droppin g the conversation for a moment , or o Being not-need y o Being unaffected o Social intelligence som e other IOD . Why? Her embarrassment makes her vulnerable. o Negging he r (This IO D is a DHValso. ) By indicating even a slight disinterest using subtleties in your body o Having a strong frame o Being interesting an d fun language, you can create in he r a powerful desire to wi n o Humo r and othe r emotional stimulation. approval and validation. After using a sniper neg, try a o Being socially "in demand " other people are seeking your compliance test such as a kiss or some othe r escalation, an attention or validation; (alternately they are paying attention d notice ho w muc h easier it is to get compliance. to wha t you are saying.) - Is that a wig? Oh...well it looks nice anyway. o Connecting conversationally - I think your hair would look better [up / down]. Group Theory - What do you call that hairstyle, the waffle? *smile' Women of quality tend to be found in groups;they are rarely if ever - You have eye crusties. alone.Whe n girls get together, they engage in a group-think - You blink a lot. mentality. This groupthin k is due to the same psychological - How cute! Your nose wiggles when you talk! mechanism that causes pre selection girls look to each other -You kinda have man hands. to validate their choices an d feelings. The y will touc h each When negging, it's important that you come off sincere - she other, hold hands, whisper tilings, mov e aroun d the venue shouldn't perceive that you are reaction-seeking or that you are together, go to the bathroo m together, rescue each other from trying to make her feel bad in any way.Many negs resemble aggressive guys or nice guy losers, and generally take care of each compliments. It seems like youare trying to be nice but It has the other.Often the nice guy waits for the girl to leave her grou p so result of making her more self-conscious.We want her to believe that he can catch her alone an d hit on her. Bu t in the Mystery that she hasn't yet won us over...but we don't want her to catch on Method , we approac h the grou p itself. Wome n tend to be that it is deliberate. It must seem inadvertent. attracted to the highest value ma n in their social context. - You talk a lot. Could it be possible to tak e over her group and become -- [Motion to her nose as if you are surreptitiously warning her that the highest-value man in it? a booger is dangling from it.] Onc e the set is open , yo u disarm th e friends with stories, -- Eww, you spit on me! humo r and othe r DHVs . You'r e interesting, fun, and - Nice nails...are they real? Oh...well they look nice anyway. emotionally relevant. In fact you even steal the spotlight away --I like that skirt. Those are really popular these days. from the hottie (who is the target.)Yo u further disarm the friends --I like that skirt. I just saw a girl wearing rt a few minutes ago. by negging the target. All those other predatory guys tried to ope -- Is she always like this? n by giving her IOI s an d offering to buy he r a drink they are so - How do you guys hang with this girl? transparent. Bu t yo u negged her, turne d your back, an d - Geez, you must have driven your parents crazy. continued telling your story. Th e friends don' t perceive an -- Solipsistic ego queen! y threat they're disarmed. But unbeknowns t to them, - Where's your off button? the negs have mtroduce d a sexual tension between you and the -- I can already tell, you and I are NOTgonna get along.Those target. shoes look really comfortable. Becaus e he r friends lov e you , he r grou p thin k mentalit y no w --1 know you like I know a hole in the wall. Here's you. Here's a work s i n you r favor. Yo u hav e th e social proo f o f he r pee r hole in the wall. group . He r self-esteem i s a littl e lowere d fro m th e negs , --Hello, I'm talking, geez. an d sh e want s som e mor e attentio n fro m you , th e life o f -- Hello, it's private, geez. th e part y th e ga y wh o sort-o f pushe d he r ou t o f th e -- Excuse me I'm showing HER the pictures not YOU geez. spotligh t o f he r ow n circle o f friends. Sh e begin s t o give -- Excuse me, may I finish my sentence? yo u IOIs , an d sh e begin s t o wor k fo r you r approva l an d -- Eww your palms are sweaty. validation. I f yo u ca n consistentl y creat e reaction s like -- You have some lint on your shirt. this , yo u hav e mastere d A2 . -Uh , it's TOO EARLY in our relationship for you to be (whatever Basic grou p theor y operate s o n a combinatio n o f tw o DHVs : she's doing.) 1 ) Th e Social Proo f tha t i s generate d b y takin g - Is that your natural color?(yes) Huh...well it's not bad. ove r th e group . Personalit y traits are also demonstrate (no) So you changed it to that?- You remind me of myAunt Minnie. d t o th e group , an d thu s obliquel y t o th e target. - You remind me of that movie star....Woody Allen 2 ) Th e ability o f th e ne g no t onl y t o conve y highe r -- You sort of remind me of that TV star.. Tori Spelling. value , bu t also t o simultaneousl y disar m th e obstacles , --I like your look. Beauty is common, but you seem like you have remov e th e target's sexual power , an d motivat e he r t o chas More character.Same thing. e after yo u t o ge t i t back . - I'm not boyfriend material You need a guy who will buy you What are some interesting things to talk about in set? flowers and be really nice to you. That guy over there looks perfect Talk about ES P and its impossibility for you. Talk about ho w you me t a bear while hiking -- (Loudly) Lady, I'm not going to make out with you! Talk about ho w you were scared shitless rock climbing Demonstration of Higher Value (DHV) whe n your rop e snapped Anything you ca n do that conveys higher survival an d Or the time yo u accompanied your friend to visit a girl replication value is a DHV. Fo r example, if you ope n a set an d and your buddy was almost beaten to death whe n the girl he you already have tw o girls with you, you have demonstrate d pre- visited had a boyfriend wh o came ou t an d there was a to cut the thread than it woul d be to continue talking abou t it. twenty Whe n this happens, simply CUT the thread. minute car chase through lights and you were lookin g for Her: "Yeah so every time I hear abou t that team being in the the cop s bu t lost the crazed boyfriend before you found cop s playoffs, it makes m e think o f him. "You: "Let me see your Or the time yo u wer e in the hospital and it changed the way hands. " [Begin the Kino Test]Just completely cut her thread an d food tastes replace it with a ne w thread of your own. Of course this doesn' t Th e way birds sound clearer no w mean that you need to become Mister Interrupting Gu y wh o is Or the time you hacked into a bank bu t chickened ou t an constantly interrupting or refusing to address the issue. Jus t d pu t th e money into a charity recognize that whe n it is useful to you, you can cut a thread, Th e time you lived with four girls and whe n they all had introduce a ne w thread to replace it, and this tactic will work. In PMS there was a giant food fight fact, no t only will it work, bu t she will find you mor e attractive as Or talk about the famous perso n you me t a result, since it demonstrates that you have a strong Doe s she believe in ghosts? Why? frame.Sometimes it ca n happe n that on e of your own threads is Yo u like candles an d incense. wha t doe s she like? no t useful anymore. Fo r example, if one of her friends has |ust Th e ant farm yo u bought for your niece an d wha t yo u joined the set in the middle of your thread, this can be awkward. If learned from the experience yo u finish the story, the friend will be bore d because she has no Talk about the time you were on stage. idea what you're talking about. Bu t if you start oyer from the Talk about the time you bladed dow n a steep hill and survived beginning, no w the target is bore d because she has already heard Multiple Conversational Threads this before; and by the time you get to the en d it has becom e Durin g a conversation, especially between people wh o are anticlimactic. already acquainted with on e another, various conversational Just cut your ow n thread an d introduce a ne w one : threads will com e up . We might talk about the weather, ou r You: "...S o I' m halfway back to the house , an d there's only families, wha t we did last night, various philosophical topics or three minutes left, and I notice the ca n is starting to leak . .. " current events, etc. . .as the conversation progresses, certain [Her friend arrives and the girls immediately face each other and threads ma y be revisited or com e up periodically.Bu t people wh o start signaling each other.] are no t as well-acquainted often find comfort in a thread that has You: 'Introduc e me to your friend; it's th e polite thing to do. " situational relevance, and en d up stuck on that on e thread [Introductions occur. As you shake her hand, neg the target] until it eventually peters out. Imagine a guy is walking his do You: [new thread addressed to the friend] "S o tell me , do you g in the park, and he meets a woma n wh o is doing the same. believe in spells? Ge t this, [spells routine]" They strike up a conversation:Man: "O h hello, is that a cocker Oh , and don' t try to go back to your original thread later. It's spaniel?"Woman : "N o actually, he's a mutt. I go t hi m from try-hard.Often if you do no t lead the conversation by actively the poun d a few years ago. Ho w abou t yours?" cutting bad threads an d introducing goo d threads, an d if you Man: "She's a black lab. I suppose they are getting on rather instead delegate this responsibility to the girl, then she will allow well then, aren't they?"Woman: "Yes, yes they are, dogs are the conversation to get boring an d then she will blame yo u and funny.Man: "So have yo u ha d hi m for long.-'"Woman : "O h I think of yo u as a boring guy. So do it right an d make it happen , don' t know, abou t three years."Man: "So. . .so wha t sort of do g because she won't. food do you feed him? " "So how do you all know each other?" Notic e ho w the ma n is grasping for straws now? He was Th e line "So ho w do yo u all kno w each other? " is a rather crucial successfully interacting with the woma n on this do g thread, bu t one. (If the set is a boy/gir l two-set, try asking "So how lon g he couldn't think of another thread with situational relevance in have you guys been together?") Because this question is a piece order to continue the conversation. So he wen t back to the do g that mus t occur in every set, it is said to be a waypoint in the thread again an d it started to become rather obvious game.It's a harmless, reasonable, sociable question. It that the conversation wit h the woma n is importan t to hi m he generates conversation and provides the venusian artist with "doesn' t want to screw this up. " This is especially oodles of useful information. Fo r example, if the set consists of telegraphed by his over-use of questions dining conversation. two girls, an d you ask, "So ho w do you guys kno w each By betraying th e woman' s importance to him, the ma n lowers other? " It's possible that one of them will say, "Oh , she's my his value in he r eyes. She will fin d hi m less attractive an d will boyfriend's sister." behave accordingly. If he gets a lot of girls, he won' t care it tilings Th e important information isn't the existence of a boyfriend. wor k ou t with her. Bu t he cares therefore he must no t get If your game is tight, girls will cheat on their boyfriends at man y girls. Therefore he mus t be a low-value guy. His DL V the dro p of a hat. Rather, the important information is that has sunk the set.People wh o are well-acquainted with one she is probably no t going to cheat on he r boyfriend in front of his another tend to use multiple conversational threads while sister, wh o is standing right here. talking, whereas people wh o aren't as well- acquainted "So how do you all know each other?" might also reveal that the can ge t stuck on a single thread, followed by a polite en d grou p consists of co workers, or that the guy yo u thought to the conversation.By introducing multiple conversational was a threat was actually your target's brother. (Lucky yo u threads into your set, you can create a strong were doing Mystery Metho d an d befriended hi m in the first feeling of familiarity in the set, as if you are already all old place.)Throw negs like pebbles friends.In the early par t of a set, whe n you haven't yet A s yo u weav e th e multiple threads o f you r conversation , demonstrated muc h value, girls won' t be eager to contribute muc occasionally th e time will com e t o po p ou t a neg. Whe n this h effort to continue the set. Yo u must be able to contribute ninety happens , it's importan t tha t you r target doesn' t see yo u percent of the conversation or it will the. watchin g for he r reaction . If yo u are trying to get a reactio n Ove r time as attraction is created, yo u ca n then use this ou t of her, she won't perceive the neg as genuine and inadvertant, attraction to bait the girl into mor e participation and investment. and thus it won't work.Furthermore , reaction-seeking behavio r i s But even the n yo u mus t be leading the interaction and keeping a DLV . An d wh y woul d yo u wan t t o d o that? he r stimulated. Thu s it's extremely importan t that yo u be able to So toss you r ne g like a pebble . Before it reaches its destination, talk talk talk. Learn to always hav e something to talk about. Ge yo u hav ealready turne d you r hea d an d continue d th e t into a talkative moo d an d practice talking to everyone, no t conversation . As far as she cantell, it's no t somethin g that you'r just ho t girls. Introduce several different routines and jump e still thinkin g about , o r gav e muc h though t to in the first bac k an d forth between them instead of running them place. linearly.Notic e ho w logistical problems seem to disappear whe Th e Spell s Routin e By Style n you keep the target's conscious min d occupied with your Hey guys, I want to get your opinion on something. Do you think conversational threads. You'v e always go t a thread to go back to . spells work?I know, it's a strange question. But I have a reason for Whereas your set ca n sour quickly whe n there are to o many asking. Let me just get your opinions then I'll tell you. uncomfortable pauses, or if it suddenly appears like yo u are Our friend, he's not out with us tonight, because he's with this grasping at straws to keep the interaction alive. girl...We met her at a party last weekend, and she said she's a Th e Elvis Bit witch. So...they ended up going home together, and made out, but "Oh, oh, get this! Did you know ... that Elvis Presley died his hair nothing more happened and he passed out on the couch. He said black? Guess what his real hair color was? Really, guess. No!!!!! she wasn't really his type after all.When he woke up, he found this It was dirty blond! Isn't that weird?" tiny scroll of parchment tied with a leather string with a feather Cutting Threads stuck in it. There were weird markings inside.So we happened to be Sometimes a thread is no t useful. A girl may start talking abou t down at this esoteric shop the next day, cause I like to get candles, something that makes her feel bored , or feel sad, or think abou t and we asked the proprietor what he thinks of this little scroll. You he r boyfriend, etc. Fo r whatever reason, it is mor e useful to you know, this is one of those guys with tattoos all over his face and This is the Accomplishment Introduction. What's funn y is, if stuff.Anyway, he says, "Oh that's a love spell." you talk abou t vourself, its tooting your ow n horn. But if your So the strangest thing is, ever since then, I never see my friend wing does it, the girls believe it. All you nee d is som e minor proof. anymore. He's always hanging out with this girl, twenty- four An article photocopied to sign for them, a com p card with your seven. He says he's in love with her. So do you think its magic or picture on it to leave wit h them. just psychology? Yo u don' t have to be what you do. Yo u just have to convey an Winging accomplishment.Make it bigger tha n life. An d if you don' t wan t The Wing Rules to lie, make it true. 1 ) H e wh o open s th e set , OWNS th e set . H e gets first choic "This is Chuck. He' s a broker." Boring. e o f target. "This is Bender. He' s the lead singer of this awesome band called 2 ) Th e primar y purpos e o f th e win g i s t o hel p th e Razor. They just got on the charts." Respect. playe r ge t hi s target. I f th e win g ca n also gam e u p his Wha t is your great accomplishment ? (Real or imagined.) Yo n ow n target from the group , fine. Bu t tha t is no t his first can have mor e than on e and enjoy flipping from one to another. priority. Again, you can't too t your ow n hor n bu t your wing can. Write 3) Don' t eve r stea l th e target. Sometime s th e player your accomplishment intr o for your wing to use. It only makes is ignoring or neggin g his target while workin g the group . I t him appear cool to o to be hanging with a ma n of woul d b e really easy t o go int o hi s set at this poin t an d give said accomplishment.Wha t would you do with your life if yo u had attentio n to the target don' t do it! no chance of failure? Wha t is your dream? Wha t do you 4 ) Th e win g shoul d occup y th e obstacle s s o tha t th e honestly wan t to become ? Think big be big. playe r gets mor e tim e one-on-on e wit h his target. It's a powerful dynamic when you and your wing can 5 ) Alway s agre e wit h you r wing . Neve r take the girls' side run stories about each other. over him . H e is always right. Th e Gandh i Bi t 6 ) You r win g i s a grea t guy , a coo l guy . Tha t i s wh y yo u Di d you kno w Gandh i was a lawyer? Di d yo u kno w h e was han g ou t wit h him. After all, you hav e high standards . from England? Di d yo u kno w he was hun g like a horse?A 7 ) You r wing' s feeling s are importan t t o you , eve n mor hint for telling stones:The shorter it is, the earlier you can use it. e importan t tha n th e girl's feelings . I f h e approache s you Storytelling r set, yo u will tur n t o face him . (Girls d o th e sam e wit h Whe n you tell a story, it doesn't have to be explicitly impressive. their friends.) I f yo u disrespect you r wing , it will lower your In fact, it's better if it's no t some amazing story; yo u don' t wan t value to the girls! Neve r leave hi m standing aroun d withou the target to thin k you're trying to impress her. As lon g as the t acknowledgin g and/o r introducin g him . story is fun, interesting, an d mos t importantly captures the Entering a Set as a Wing - Style's Method attention of her group, the n it is fine. Thes e sorts of stories are The "Were you guys just talking about.. . " method mos t congruent if they are somewhat true an d based on events Th e Player has opene d a set an d has ha d enoug h time to from you r ow n life .Whe n it is possible to convey traits that pass th e social hoo k point . Th e Win g approache s the Player. will flip attraction switches, without making it obvious that you Player faces Win g an d greets him . are doing so deliberately, it is a DH V and generates attraction. Fo r Player the n says, "He y guys, this is my friend Wing. " example, in a story, it is possible to flip the leader of men Win g says, "Oh , wer e yo u guy s just talking about... " attraction switch by congruentl y adding something like: "...s o I Player says, ". . .Yeah whe n that girl cast a spell on Aaron... told hi m I have no choice, it's my little sister. So he jumps in the Conversation continues from this point. Wing is now in the set. car, cause you kno w my friends are there for me one-hundre d Entering a Set as a Wing - Standard Method by Toecutte r percent, an d I' m the same way for them, that's just ho w we The "Have you seen Michelle?" method are... " Similarly, the preselection switch and othe r switches can Th e Player has opene d a set an d has ha d enoug h tim e t o be flipped in this manne r also. pass th e social hoo k point . Th e Win g approache s th e Player. Describe i n term s o f sensatio n an d emotio n Player faces Win g an d greets him . Whe n telling stories, me n tend to focus on the facts at hand , Win g says, "He y man , hav e yo u seen Michelle?" whereas wome n look for the sensation and emotion caused by Player says, "Nope , sorry* man. " the experience. Structure your language to take this into Win g says, "I' m going to go find her." account. Example : Win g turn s to leave an d starts walkin g away. Bad : This guy grabbed my ass, can you believe that? I looked like Player interrupts , grabs Wing' s ar m an d pulls hi m bac k an idiot. int o set. Notice that at this point, the player has the option Good : The n I felt a stron g han d caress my ass and grip NOT to pull the wing back into the set. It's the player's choice it tightly. I turned around, an d there was this ma n with a what happens here. handlebar mustache smiling suggestively at me . All the girls Player says, "He y wait man , yo u should mee t these girls. started laughing. I have never.. .felt so surprised.. .and Thes e girls are prett y cool." embarrassed.. .in my entire life! Win g says, "Cool , ho w d o yo u guys kno w Player?' Notic e ho w th e above story segment conveys the emotion s Girls say, "W e just me t him , just now. " of surprise an d embarrassment bot h of which are useful Win g says, "Cool . Ge t this. Las t weekend, " [Wing goes during a story. Thre e or four story segments like this pu t into routine] together can lead the listener throug h a little emotional At some point soon the player is talking to one girl while the journey. With skilled delivery, this is a DHV , even if it doesn't wing is talking to the other girl. Now they have split the set reveal some value- raising factoid abou t your lire. and can go into A3. Story Theory by Wilder of Pick-U p 101 Entering a Set as a Wing - Mystery's Tak e Telling stories to a group of people is one of the best ways to The Accomplishment Intro generate attraction in pick-up when don e correctly.What follows Th e Player has opene d a set an d has ha d enoug h time t o are several tilings to consider when choosing and crafting stones pass th e social hoo k point . Th e Win g approache s th e Player. for use in the field during attraction phases. They're more Player faces Win g an d greets him . guidelines than hard and fast rules, as YOU can break most of them Player the n says, "He y guys, this is my friend Wing, he's... " when you know what you're doing. o "...a good friend of mine," 1. Story material. This is close to a no-brainer. Choose stories that o "...a local musician here in town, the band is really good," are interesting, run and girl relevant! Usually these stories are o ".. .one of the smartest guys I know." funny. Use stories you tell often to friends and ne w people that Win g says, "Nic e to mee t yo u guys. "Conversation continues get big laughs. Avoid stories about distasteful subjects such as from this point. Wing is now in the set. death, car accidents, bad breakups, etc. TH E ACCOMPLISHMEN T INTRO 2. Be succinct . Write your story out wor d for word and then gut "He's the guy wh o <fill in blank>. " it. Ge t rid of everything the listener doesn't need to know and Ge t your wing to introduce you by nam e and accomplishment doesn't care about. It's essential that you're ruthless here. Better EG: Style says, "This is Mystery, Erik vo n Markovik, the guy wh o to cut too muc h than too little. State the boring but necessary levitated overNiagara Falls. He was on the Roseanne Show." details as succinctly as possible. And if I have my autograph book with me, this is who I am. 3. Lead in. This is ho w you start the story. The lead in should be EG : Mystery says, "I'd like to introduce you to Anando . He's th e congruent with the story to follow. Communicate using words, guy they wrote abou t wh o hacked int o the power-grid an d tonality an d energy the type of story to follow. Some examples turned California off for 6 hours . are, "O h my God, the funniest /craziest / weirdest thing happened EG : Mad Das h says, "This is Chris Powles. He' s the guy wh to me the other day!" or "Did you guys ever notice whatever?" or o sucked off six hundre d me n in on e hour. I was one of 'em." "You'll never believe this, check it out." 4. Initial hook. An initial hoo k is something that makes peoples' I am pre-selected by girls withou t bragging abou t it, whic ears perk up. It should be as close to the beginning of the h i s muc h mor e effective than saying "Hey, chicks dig story as possible and should be specifically chosen to make me. " people lean in and pay attention. If your story is about 7. Conve y personality traits: something that happened to you at an S & M party, put that part -I'm sexually open up front! - I'm adventurous Bad: My friend called me the other day an d left me a message to -I take things in stride call him back. So I called him and he went on and on about his - I'm cool with weird and unusual people and situations Mother's operation before finally telling me about this party he 8. Delivery is key. wanted to go to. Turns out, it's an S & M party! 9 . Punc h line: "Ho w did yo u kno w my name?" Good: So the oilier day I went to this S & M party! Using a lock-i n prop 5. Unanswere d questions. Craft your story so that there will Sometimes while runnin g the set, you are in the middle of be unanswered questions in the listener's mind. You want them to negging and ignoring the target and she just leaves. To preven t ask you questions that give you the opportunity to further increase this, lock her in using a prop . Pu t your feather boa on her, or your your value. hat. Or han d her your photo s (for your photo routine) and ask Example: So I was picking up my new car the other day and the her to hol d them for a second. No w you have her locked in. salesman wouldn't stop asking me about my watch. The girl I was At some poin t in the future you'll be able to continue with with finally told hi m we had to go so she could pick up her her, even if she temporarily wanders off.This also creates instrument for a concert she was doing that night. trust. By showing that yo u trust he r with you r prop , which Unanswered questions: she could steal, you also build he r trust i n you .If she - What kind of car did you just buy? starts to get restless, dangle some bait. Say somethin g - What kind of watch were you wearing? like,"I have somethin g really cool I need to sho w yo u in just a -Are you rich? sec... " - Who was the girl you were with? Locking-ln - What kind of performance did she have to get to ? Imagine a two-set is at the bar. They're charting, surveying the roo 6. Allude, don' t stat e directly. In the examples above you're m and sipping on their drinks. (It's no t wise to ope n a set while alluding. You're alluding to the fact that you have money, as you they are waiting to orde r a drink, that's a recipe for a constant just bought a ne w car and have a cool watch. You're alluding to stream or interrupts in Al an d A2 . Wait until the drinks are paid the fact that you hang out with cool girls. Stated directly, any of for an d are being consumed. )Whe n YOU ope n this set, the girls this information would sound like bragging, so you allude to it. will have their backs to the bar. They will see the entire roo m Make them ask you about it: don't volunteer it. behind you, over your shoulder. But yo u will see nothin g except 7. Conve y jsersonality traits. In telling a story, you're telling the bar behind them . Ther e is a slight power differential in someone a great deal about yourself. Kno w what personality your positions. As lon g as they are comfortable in their spot on traits you want to convey. Craft your stones to subtly tell the bar, an d yo u are slightly less comfortable standing before someone that you're adventurous, rich, famous, creative, them, giving them a superior line of sight, then there will be a courageous, etc. It shouldn't be discernable that you are leak of social power from YOU to the set. conveying these traits deliberately. Yo u wan t t o tak e thei r spo t a t th e bar . 8. Delivery. Tills is hard to put in print, but vary your tonality as Th e Spi n Maneuver , adapte d t o stea l he r spo t widely as possible. Talk slow, then fast, then low, then high and 1) Yo u tell one of the girls, "G o like this." An d hold your han d ou then higher! The same story can be told playfully, seductively or t at chest level with the wrist bent. This is a compliance test. in a way that generates intrigue. Make transitions smoothly an d 2) If she defies the test an d refuses to cooperate, you didn' tell the story in a way that sucks your listener right in. Along with t have enough attraction. D o a n IOD , then a DHV , then give this, act out parts of the story with your hands or your whole body. her another compliance test. As yo u gain her compliance throug This doesn't mean get really excited and try-hard. It means use h this process yo u ca n eventually come back to this loc k in' the expressiveness in your delivery to create an experience for maneuver an d continu e from step 3: the listener. 3) If she complies, she will hold her han d ou t to matc h yours. 9. Hav e a punc h line. A punch line is a line that sums up your Take her han d and say, "No w do a little spin." This is story in a powerful way. It's a way of letting the listener kno w that another compliance test. the story is over. It doesn't have to be funny, though in many 4) If she complies, spin he r aroun d an d during this process, mov stories used in the field it will be. e her body away from the bar, stepping into her former spo t No w Examples: you are leaning against the bar in the powe r position instead of "That's the last time I take THA T dog to the beach!" her, an d she is facing yo u with her back to the room . "From no w on I'm asking to see girls' IDs!" 5) With a cocky and playful attitude say, "Oh! " like yo u just "That was the day I learned the true meaning of courage." tricked her and she totally fell for it. If you do it right, she'll be Burning Man Story laughing an d shel l punc h your arm an d call yo u a jerk. Both The Girls at Burning Alan are flacking crazy! So I met this girl at girls will also find you mor e attractive. Ru n another routine to dinner and we really hit it off. We spent the whole evening kee p their logical minds occupied an d continue stimulating them together and she was great, but something seemed a little off. (A2.) Anyway, she finally takes me back to her tent and it's really Onc e you have locked yourself int o the set, the perception in romantic and everything, then afterwards we fall asleep in each the roo m shifts180. No w the girls seem to be all up on you, others' arms. In the morning I kissed her on her forehead, bu t she instead of the othe r way around. Instead of merely talking to the didn't wake up, So I left and went to my own tent, which was like girls, it looks like you own them . This psychology trick also affects twenty yards away, figuring I'd see he r at breakfast.But she's no t the girls themselves. Soo n yo u are leaning back against the bar at breakfast. And she's no t at lunch. And she's no t at dinner. comfortably an d your target is standing between your legs while Finally after dinner, I see her across the space an d she comes you ru n the kino test or read he r palm.Sometime during A2 you right oyer to me with this weird look on her face. She puts her should he locked into your set You want to he leaning hack against hand on my chest, looks deep into my eyes and says, "O h my God something while the girls face you, with their hacks to the room. . you're so hot, I have to meet you." The whole room should see you as the comfortable focal point of I looked at her and said, "Sarah, it's me." your group. The n she gets this really weird look on he r face and says, "Ho w Role-Playing did you know myname?!" Playful role-plaving builds attraction. Just invent some crazy 1. Story materia l Burnin g Man , Romance , Sex scenario in your head and describe it to her. Make sure it's fun an d 2. Be succinct. playful, no t heavy. 3. Lea d in: "Th e Girls at Burnin g Ma n are tuckin g crazy!" I'd Mystery: 'Yo u kno w wha t I wanna do with you? ... Yo u an d I say this animate d an d playfully, to convey tha t there's a are gonna go toGreece ... an d I'll dress you up in a toga an d we'll story comin g sell hotdog s at the beach." 4. Initial hook : Crazy girls at Burnin g Man Sometimes little bits of material like this are preferable to longer 5. Unanswere d questions: - What is Burning Man? - Whafs stories. Practice having normal conversations, bu t the n peppering Burning Man like? - Are chicks always so attracted to you? in little DHV s such as these. No t only is this useful as an - What's wrong with this girl? - What happened next with this girl? attraction tool, bu t it's also useful in the comfort phase, wher e 6. Allude, don' t state directly. Thi s story assume s that it's useful to create a feeling of shared conspiracy. Style: 'Yo u kno w wha t I wanna do with you? I want us to go to the beach together ... an d you'll wear a nu n outfit an d I'll wear a priest outfit... an d we'll hold hands and make ou t in front These are simplest bu t have a danger of turning into anothe of everybody." r scenario type instantly if he r friends come to her side. In fact, False Disqualifie s all possible scenario types may change abruptly at any time. Using false disqualifiers such as these has a disarming This phenomeno n is know n as an interrupt. Yo u must be effect and also demonstrates value. In fact, they are identical to dynamic enough to alter your approac h whe n this happens .A negs in this regard. These lines demonstrate confidence, fun, a lack single scenario has no obstacles.Yo u approach he r straight out. of neediness, and a discriminating attitude that says I'm the Ther e she is. Don' t wait for eye contact to o needy. Just one controlling the frame, I'm the one who is the prize, and approac h her and when she looks up at YOU, look he r in the eve I'm the one who is screening; you to determine whether an d smile.If yo u see the girl from a distance and you've assessed or not you qualify for my attention.With practice, these IOD s the scenario to be a single, then yo u can wait there for her to can be deadly. notice yo u an d then immediately go over or yo u can just go right "I t woul d never wor k ou t between us. " over without waiting. BUT: Do no t get eve contact an d then fail to "I can already tell, you and I are not going to get along." approach, an d think yo u can use that eye contact later to "You'r e fired." approac h her. If yo u didn't approach he r right away (the 3 "You'r e to o muc h of a nice girl for me. " Second Rule) then you blew it and while it's possible to still ge t "You'r e a dancer? OM G I can't even talk to you," her, you're no w in damage control mode . "I' m totally no t boyfriend material. Hey, that guy over Nothin g is perfect really, bu t yo u wan t to minimize the time there looksperfect for you." between whe n the girl notices yo u an d whe n you approach. "W e are so broken up . I wan t my CD' s back." Smile an d enter, and us e any opene r yo u please. An d "You r firs t impression sucked... " remember , thoug h you are openin g her directly, it's from a The Peg System screening frame, no t a begging frame. Yo u are curious abou t he The Peg System is a routine that enables yo u to demonstrat r and interested to find ou t more . Th e openin g statement can e a photographic memory. Yo u ca n also teach this routine to be a remark to that effect followed by a conventional opene r the girl the act of teaching it is a routine in an d of itself.First, and false time constraint. you must memoriz e the pegs. The y are: Two-Sets- Is the target with another girl? One-Bun, Two-Shoe, Three-Tree, Four-Door, Mark the friend as your obstacle. Five-Hive, Six-Sticks, Seven-Heaven, Eight-Gate, Nine- Don' t go straight for the target if she is no t alone. Th e reason Line, Ten-Hen is that yo u will alienate he r less attractive friend wh o will then Onc e yo u have these memorized, yo u are ready to perform this act as a disgruntled guardian of the target and pull he r away. routine.Th e effect:Pull out your trusty notepad an d pen, an d Yo u must win the obstacle over first. Yo u can use this opportunity write the number s 1 through 10 on the paper. Ask he r to pick a to not make eye contact with the target. Whe n the target begins to rando m wor d to write dow n next to each number. Fo r example, talk, you can immediately ne g her, then go back to the obstacle. let's say she chose the words: 1. Dog , 2. Car, 3. Water, 4. Doin g this will make the obstacle laugh. It will also make the Dancing, 5. Cocaine, 6. Oute r Space, 7. Ugly, 8. target feel a little self-conscious. Lock-in the target using a Airplane, 9. Strait jacket, an d 10. Backscratcher. Lock-In Prop. Continue talking to the obstacle(allowing the After briefly studying the paper, you claim to have all the word s target to listen) until the target begins to attemp t o fix her memorize d an d in order. Yo u ca n list the m forwards or image with yo u from the negs. The n she will be chasing you. Ne g backwards. If she calls ou t a number , yo u can instantly answer her again. The n finally take time ou t to pay attention to her. As with the wor d associated with that number . Apparently you have k the obstacle if it's ok to talk to her friend. Because the obstacle a photographic memory.Th e secret: likes you now , she will say yes. (O r "I guess.") Yo u memorize the word s simply by hanging them on the pegs in Don' t spend to o muc h time on the obstacle. Five to eight your memory.Remembe r the pegs: One-Bun , Two-Shoe , minutes is usually enough. If you spend to o muc h time on her, Three-Tree, Four-Door , Five-Hive, Six-Sticks, Seven-Heaven, the target will believe the obstacle really likes yo u an d will Eight-Gate, Nine-Line, an d Ten-Hen .Wor d 1 is Dog. " Th e first disappear or try to get you tw o together. Yo u have to make it pe g is "Bun. " Make a strange picture in your mind, of a furry do clear onc e yo u see that the obstacle likes yo u that you g on a bun , like a hot-do g bu n only with a live dog . This is a switch your attention over to the target. Only time in the field will weird picture that you won' t easily forget. So whe n she calls ou t give you the calibration to do this properly. th e numbe r one , it's easy to make the connection in your mind: Finally, you will sho w the target a sign that yo u like one-bun-ho t do g bun with furry do g- the wor d is Dog ! somethin g about he r by complimenting he r on her Anothe r example. Th e fourth wor d she chose was "Dancing." personality, no t he r anatomy. A goo d one is "I can tell you are a Th e fourth pe g is"Door. " So picture a ballroom full of dancing leader. I bet you're the leader of your friends. I like that."It can be doors. Later whe n you are trying to remembe r th e fourth wor d difficult to get a girl int o isolation for comfort-building whe n she is she chose, you'll remembe r Four-Door-Dancin g Door s the in a two-set. Th e reason is that she will feel bad at the thought of wor d is Dancing! leaving her friend alone. This is wh y it's useful to have a wing Using this same trick it is possible to go to twenty or thirty as well. who can occupy the obstacle. In the ideal scenario, bot h girls will Fo r example, let's say she chooses ten mor e words, for a total of be potential targets. Yo u and you r wing then split the set, pull twenty: the girls and nail the m both. Th e Peg s (Secret ) One-Bu n Two-Shoe Three-Tree Four-Doo r Three-Set s-If the target with two or more girls? Five-Hive Six-Sticks Seven-Heaven Eight-Gate Nine-Line Ten-He n This is the same as the two-set bu t you mus t disarm bot h Chose n Word s 1.Do g 2. Car 3 . Water 4. Dancin g 5. Cocaine obstacles first. Again, you get the acceptance of these obstacles 6. Oute r Space 7. Ugly 8. Airplane 9. Straitjacket 10. whe n yo u neg their friend (the target.) After yo u win the Backscratcher obstacles over and begin accepting the target's attention, yo u can Additiona l Words 11. Win d 12. Sailboat 13. Compute r 14. Casino ask the obstacles if it's all right to spend some time with the target. 15. Guitar 16. Book s 17. Horn y 18. Camera 19. Jogging 20. They will say yes because they like you. In fact, they ma y even Pape r Clip leave yo u tw o alone. Fo r one, yo u pictured a forty do g on a hot-do g bun. Fo r eleven, "Let's see wha t adventure awaits us in that room. " (Put he r picture the same thing, except no w it is blowing aroun d in on your arm, promenade-style.) the wind. A furry do g on a bun , blowing in the wind. No w yo "He y guvs, I' m going to borro w your friend for a sec, we'll u can remembe r that wor d on e is dog, and wor d eleven is be right there o n th e couch. " wind.Fo r wor d four, picture a ballroom full of dancing doors. Fo r "He y guys, I've been ignoring you r friend, I need to make it fourteen, picture the same thing, except add man y casino tables up to her. We'll be right back " such as blackjack an d roulette.In this manner , yo u can continue "You r friend an d I like each other, are you cool with that?" to ad d number s ad-infinitum, in groups of ten. By simply ("Uh, I guess...' ) memorizin g the pegs once , you are no w prepared to "Is it ok if I borro w your friend for a second? " ("Uh I guess, perform this routine on-the-fly with any ne w set of randomly if it's ok with her..." ) chose n words , demonstrating that yo u apparently have a "I like you r friend. Is it alright if I talk to her for a minute/ ' photographic memory. "W e kinda like each other, is that ok with you? " Part tw o of this routine is to teach it to th e girl. "I woul d very muc h like to see your friend again, is that Various Group Scenarios alright with you? "- > "Grea t the n we'll b e right back " "Lead the men and the women will follow." -> "Goo d the n can you give us just a minut e because I've Man y grou p scenarios occu r on a regular basis, so let's ge t go t to get going " acquainted with them . Mixed Two-Set s -Is the target with a boyfriend? Single Set - If the target alone? Assume that if a girl is with a boy that they are just friends. Go In the A2 phase, you demonstrate higher value to the set in an d approach the man. Befriend him. Onc e yo u have disarmed while simultaneously negging the target. She will respond with him, then you can ask "Ho w do you kno w each other? " He will indicators of interest which can he used to gauge your tell you. If he's the boyfriend, yo u just made a ne w bu d an d progress. didn't even introduce yourself to the girl so yo u can't get in Some IOIs don't happen without a minimum amount of trouble. If he's no t the boyfriend, then she is no w fair game. attraction. A girl may be attracted enough to sit down with you, Remembe r to ne g her politely in front of him. Whe n she starts but not to leave the venue together. getting agitated or whe n she begins to try to get your attention, The most important IOIs are: She laughs, she re-initiates you can do a couple mor e negs an d then finally pay attention to conversation, she touches, and she tries to get rapport. her. Th e gu y will get ou t of the wa y an d will watch you Passive IOIs are sometimes the only IOIs that she will actually wor k the girl. Yo u ma y be surprised ho w many times give. This is why it's important to use compliance tests while the guy just disappears altogether an d is never heard from or gaming. mentioned again. Girls will occasionally give fake IOIs when it suits their Mixed Sets - Is the target with two or more guys? purposes, although most of the time people are not consciously Same as above, bu t yo u have to disarm all the males an d aware of the IOIs they are giving off. find wha t the relationships are before yo u pay any attention to There are also indicators of disinterest, or IODs, When a her. person gives an IOD , she conveys disinterest and an Pawning unwillingness to invest in the interaction. Fo r a woma n of particular quality, it is necessary to demonstrat e A Neg is an innocuous statement that only a disinterested pre-selection in order to game her. Before you ope n the set with party would say. Negs are actually a for m o f IOD . the nine, YOU mus t first ope n a set with a seven an d attract her, There are three types of Negs. The shotgun neg, which an d pu t her on your arm. She is no w your pawn. With this conveys disinterest and disarms the group, the tease neg which demonstration of pre-selection firmly in place, ope n the set with is cocky and playful and used for flirting, and the sniper the nine. It should ope n easily due to your value.At some point neg, which causes the target to believe that she has done a DLV, whe n yo u are in A3 with the nine, whe n she is earning when in fact she has not. This creates embarrassment. your affections, you will be able to "choose " her over the seven, Anything you can do that conveys higher survival and wh o the n disappears, never to be hear d from or mentioned replication value is a DHV, or demonstration of higher value. again.-A pawn can be paraded aroun d the field to build social Correspondingly there is also a DLV, or demonstration proof. She can be used to ope n sets whic h will fly ope n with of lower value. ease. She can be used to create drama or jealousy in later stages Using a combination of DHVs and Negs, the venusian artist of the set.Pawns are often unwitting participants in your game, disarms and befriends the obstacles. This enables him to although sometimes they are willing. Fo r example: harness the social proof of the target's peer group. At the same Pivots time, the negs cause her to crave validation from him. She A pivot is a female friend that you bring to the field in orde r to responds by giving IOIs. This is A2. build social proof, ope n sets, create jealousy, an d distract "So, how do you all know each other?" is a question that obstacles. In return for he r services, you sho w he r a goo d time usually arises in every set, and it tends to yield very useful an d help her to meet guys. At times, a well-trained pivot can be information. mor e useful than a goo d wing. People who are well-acquainted with one another tend Forward and Backwar d Merging to use multiple conversational threads while talking, whereas As time passes in the field, practice merging sets. Be that people who are newly-acquainted tend to go from one complete social guy wh o introduces peopl e around. Ther e are tw o thread to another in a more linear fashion. By using multiple principal types of merging: forward an d backward.To merge conversational threads, you can create the feeling like you and forward means, to ope n a ne w set and merge your existing the target are already old friends. set into the ne w set. Pawnin g is often an example of forward When a certain thread is not useful to you, feel free to cut it merging.To merge backward means to re-ope n a previous and introduce a new thread to replace it. Sometimes this is set and merg e your existing set back int o the previous set. necessary even when it is your own thread being cut. This can be useful. Fo r example, if yo u target is in a two-set, yo u Stories should convey positive traits and personality) will have trouble isolating her because he r friend would be stuck and lead the listener through a fun series of interesting alone. Bu t by merging the m into another set, creating a larger thoughts or emotional waypoints. The story doesn't have to be set, you can now7 isolate your target. ("We re going to sit right amazing or overly impressive, just engaging and over there an d read her palm. . .") enjoyable. Shorter is better. Remember , yo u aren't just gaming the set, bu t the entire Sometime during A2 you should be locked-in to your set. room . Is anyone else merging sets in this room ? No ? The n You want to be leaning back against something while the girls you mus t be the mos t sociable guy in here. face you, with their backs to the room. How to practice your game While you are ignoring the target, lock her in using a lock-in Do the Mystery Method newbie drill for at least a mont prop to ensure she won't leave if she gets bored or distracted in the h or two. Ope n three sets per hour, four hour s pe r night, four meantime. nights pe r week. Follow the 3-Second Rule. A pawn is a girl that you have gamed and put on your arm Have an opener memorized, as well as a false time solely to exploit for social proof, to open sets, and to create constraint. jealousy with your real target. Practice you r delivery, including body language, body rocking, Chapter 6 voice tone, comfortable attitude, an d stron g frame. Wor k on A3: Male-to-Female Interest naturalizing your delivery. She must be baited to invest herself in this interaction As a result, Release all expectation of outcome an d just enjoy the she feels that she now represents a unique valueOnce interest has process like a ne w hobby . been generated, the game is no t over. If only it were that easy. In Don' t be picky about your sets it's all just practice. Ope n fact, it is no t attraction that gets the girl. She mus t become mixed sets. invested in this interaction, an d then comfort mus t be Practice getting locked-in to you r set as early as possible. built. The attraction is useful to bait he r into investing. Othe r Practice multiple conversational threads and thread than that, attraction is bu t a vapor. She might be making ou t cutting. with yo u tonight bu t that doesn' t mea n she'll return your calls Every other night, add a new routine to your routine tomorrow . stack. Make sure there are at least on e or two goo d stories to It could be said that attraction is only a tool. In A3 yo u start ou t with, as well as an accomplishment intr o for you r wing. will use her interest, combined with takeaways an d screening, Ever y couple of nights, ad d a ne w neg, false disqualifier, to bait the target int o demonstrating value of he r own . Whe n some role- playing, or some other canned material to your she demonstrates value in an attempt to win yo u over, reward he routine stack. Play around with it. r with IOIs , then bait her again as the process repeats. In this Pus h each set as far as you ca n just for the practice. way, he r reward is tied to he r investment. As she demonstrates Use kino escalation and compliance testing as muc h as value, she is rewarded vet baited to demonstrat e mor e value. possible. (Chapter 6. This all comes back to pair bonding. A woma n takes a Feel free to go for phon e number s just for the practice. (They muc h larger risk evolutionarily (and therefore emotionally) whe n won' t amoun t to anything early on in your practice the she has sex. It's no t enoug h that she is attracted to you the number s are all flakes. Call the m anyway just for the practice.) pair bon d mus t be there as well. She mus t have some assurance Chapter Five Review that whe n she is pregnant back in the cave, yo u will stick around to bring her your fresh kills from the hunt . Otherwise showing off to her, reacting to her, apologizing to her and you could impregnate her, mov e on to your next dalliance, an d explaining yourself to her, those are all IOI s that she can measure she's screwed. an d exploit. Of course, we are speaking only of emotions. Is it really true tha t If you jum p int o her hoops , two things will happen. One , she the pair bon d"must " be there? Obviously not, one-night stands will feel really goo d about herself som e part of he r will be happe n every day. What is the meaning then?Th e meaning is that reassured on a primal level. An d two, she will lose attraction. Just she still has this emotional circuitry and it is a factor in he r because she likes something doesn't mea n that it will get you any behavior. He r emotion s prefer a ma n of high value high enoug closer to having sex wit h her.B e careful. O n on e hand, yo u h that it requires effort and investment in order to win hi m over. don' t wan t t o b e th e chum p wh o gets tooled. O n the other An d he r emotions do want to wi n hi m over she wants to feel hand, yo u also don' t wan t to be the social robo t that is always that he is pair bondin g to her. playing power games whe n he should be relaxing an d In other words , she wants to feel that she is important to hi confidently enjoying his interactions with women .People aren't m no t just as an attractive woman , bu t as a specific woman . always trying to fuck with you. She needs to feel that it wasn't easy, she ha d to invest and there Whe n a hoo p doe s com e along , th e chum p i s eager t o was some fear of loss, but no w he is "falling" for he r an d she jum p int o he r hoop . H e think s i t show s he r ho w muc h h e represents a unique value to him. Thi s is all instinctive.When you cares . H e think s i t i s romanti c an d will wi n he r over . H e can bait a woman into working for your affections, and think s an y gu y wh o doe s otherwis e i s a jerk . Bu t yo u don' t you can convey your resulting "growing pair bond" hav e t o jum p int o he r hoop . Yo u ca n tur n i t bac k o n effectively, you have mastered A3 and are ready to move her. O r yo u ca n creat e a ne w hoo p just fo r her. O r yo u into comfort and trust. ca n ignor e i t entirely silence i s ofte n th e bes t reply . Frame Control Som e examples : Th e frame is the underlying meaning. It's the context, the Pu t u p a ne w hoop : Girl: Wh y are yo u talking t o me? implication the unspoke n assumption in everything yo u say. You : D o you always wear your lipstick like that? If someon e asks you, "Are the fish biting today?" then he is - O R - You : [to he r friends] is she always like this? Ge t this, implying that yo u have been ou t fishing. He hasn't said so , bu t <Start a routine> the listener will assume it is true it's just part of the frame. Ignor e he r comment : Girl: Wha t is with your Th e frame supplies meaning to the content. Fo r example, if shirt?You : He y guys , ge t this. Last weekend , m y friend an d I someon e says "Yeah that guy got off," wha t is the meaning of <Start a routine> Gra b he r hoop : Girl: Will you buy me a that statement? Dependin g on the context, it could mea n that drink? You : Bu y me a drin k an d we will see the 'guy' just go t off of work. It could also mean that he beat a Ever y conversatio n ha s som e give-and-take . I f sh e gives yo u rap at th e courthouse an d wa s set free. It could also mea n he a hoop , i t i s actually ok to |um p int o it, provide d tha t had an orgasm. Thes e are pretty different meanings. yo u first get her to jump into one of your own. Whichever meanin g becomes the accepted one is determined Som e example s o f this: by the frame. He who controls the frame controls the Exampl e 1: Girl: Ho w old are you? You : Guess Girl: Hmm. . communication itself. .twenty-six? You : Close, I' m actually twenty-eight. Fo r this reason, whe n interacting with othe r people, there are I n th e first example , she ask s you r age. Bu t instea d little frame games going on constantly. Throug h their behavioral of answerin g straigh t away , yo u mak e he r gues s first . cues an d subtleties in wha t they say, people convey their I n th e secon d example , she tries th e sam e tric k bac k o n assumptions. It this conveyance is done congruently enough, yo u bu t you r frame i s to o strong ! others will accept the frame as reality without even thinking abou t Exampl e 2 : You : Ho w old are you? Girl: Gues s You : D o yo u it.If your frame is strong enough, you can get away with want m e t o guess low, or guess high? Girl: Gues s low!You : O k anything. This is the caveat for every piece of advice in this book. then.. . I' d say you loo k about twenty- two. If yo u have the light frame, and it is strong enough, yo u can An interesting thing abou t hoops: the more obvious it is break every rule and anything will work. You r approach ma y be that it's a hoop, the less likely it becomes that someone technically wrong , bu t she still responds. Fo r a newbie, buying will jump into it.Fo r example, let's say that someon e asked drinks for girls is a bad move , bu t everyone has a story wher e you, "He y man , ca n you grab me a glass of water while someon e bought drinks and then got laid. So, whic h is the right you're up?" That' s a pretty reasonable hoo p an d mos t way?The field will give you the answers that you seek. Go, and be people would hav e no problem with such a request.Bu t what if in the field, and listen to your intuition there. Over time you will instead he said this: "He y man , wh y don' t you get up , go in calibrate. the kitchen, and get me some Ricking water like the little bitch that Wome n will definitely test for congruence. It she can easily yo u are."Fe w indeed are the people wh o woul d jump int o impos e he r frame over yours, this is a serious demonstration of that hoo p it would be tantamoun t to accepting the frame lower value on you r part. In fact, this DL V will mos t likely wreck that they are your bitch. So. . .what you want to do is start small. any sexual chances you ha d wit h her. Ho w can she rely on yo u Bait the target into small, innocuous hoops . Ove r time, as she to stand up to the big, ba d world on her behalf, an d on behalf of falls into your frame, those hoop s can becom e larger an d mor her offspring, if yo u cannot even stand up to her? Th e e frequent. This process is know n as compliance momentum. security she feels from being with a stron g ma n is a primary Soon she'll be rubbin g your back and cooking you r dinner, bu t factor in he r unconscious sexual selection strategy. for no w start small by making he r guess your age. Beware.. .some me n in the field will also play frame games on you. Role-Reversal If a guy can tool you in front of your set, the n he ca n take your In the previous chapter we discussed ho w attraction can be girls. She will almost always choos e the ma n with tighter game created through role- plaving. A great role to play probably the an d a stronger frame, an d she will do it with little regard or best on e is on e wher e yo u have mor e social value than the loyalty to the fun little connection that she was previously enjoying target. In fact, this should be your reality, since she will otherwise with you. This is often true even if yo u are he r boyfriend.Th e only find yo u less attractive.Subtle cues in you r behavior will betray factor that counteracts this is he r level of investment in yo u your assumptions. It's importan t that the frame you convey in it will be psychologically muc h mor e difficult for her to jump those assumptions is on e wher e she wants you, she is to the next ma n if she has already invested a lot of time an d chasing after you , yo u are the one with higher value, you are th e effort int o you. on e wh o decides if you wan t continue with her, and yo u are Hoop Theory screening her to make sure she qualifies for you.Notic e that On e frame game that people play is they will offer hoops, to this is exactly wha t a woma n will do . Throug h little tilings that see if they can get YOU to jum p int o their hoop . Fo r example, she says, she sets a frame that she is the prize. Yo u don' t want to a girl might try to get YOU to do something such as hold her ge t sucked into that frame. Instead, yo u wan t to grab this hoo p purse or bu y her a drink. Or.. . and use it yourselfFo r example, a few minutes int o the She gives you a fake IO I to see if you She gives a pickup, whe n you hav e some light kino fake IO D to see if will start chasing her. (physical contact) yo u can say, "Yo u know , you're really goo d at you get worried and react. this."Without fail, she replies, "Goo d at what? " or "Wha t exactly She makes a commen t to bait you She asks do yo u mean? " something to bait you into showing off to Yo u reply, "Well you've been talking to me for just a short her. into explaining yourself to heror apologizing to her. while, an d you've already got my han d on your waist. I've gotta These are all examples of hoop s that girls will use to assert their watch ou t for you. I' m no t easy you know.'"Notic e the unspoke feminine power. If you are doing things for her, chasing after her, n assumption that yo u are the prize, tha t you are the one being chased, an d that you are the one wh o decides whether or no t this will go to the next level. If you will take any girl yo u can get, you mus t be a loser. But it you are picky, you mus t be a Can she dance well? (You know what that means!) What's the winner, an d her emotional circuitry is designed to respon d to most spontaneous thing she's done recently? Can she cook? winners.Some examples of role-reversal lines: "Is there more to you than meets the eye?" "Don' t think you're going to get something just "What do you want to be when you grow up?" because you're buying me this drink." "There are lots of beautiful women here. But what's really "Geez are you always this forward?" important is the energy, the intelligence, the little tilings about a "I don't want to rush things." person that make her unique. What are some tilings about you "I don't want to get hurt. I need lots of comfort and trust that would make me want to get to know you better?" first." "If a magician came along and you could be poof anything you "I want to get to know you better first." want to be...what would you choose? And don't say "I don't do that on a first date." princess." "Hey, hands off the merchandise, this isn't free you "If you had to pick one thing that makes life worth living, what know." would it be?... " "->[Style's EV routine.] "I'll be the judge of that." "Who are you?" "You just want me for my body." "D o you like animals?" Take her hand, then as she reciprocates, pull back and "How old are you?" -> [Now disqualify:"OMG , you're just a say "No t so fast." baby."] "Are you always this fast?" "So tell me, what are your three best qualities?" " . . .yeah if you're lucky." "Did you go to school? Are you smart? Do you have lots of "I'm no t ready to be in a relationship right now." friends?" "I wore my old briefs tonight to make sure nothing happens." "Can you cook? Do you give good backrubs? Are you "I swear, all you girls do is think about one thing." adventurous?" "OM G are you groping me??" "Are you a passionate person?" "You're a really nice girl." "There are some people who.. . they think they're open-minded "That guy oyer there looks perfect for you." and adventurous. They make all these great plans...they talk "I don't even know you." about meeting new people, or going on a diet, or taking a cool trip. "Let's just be friends." But they don't. They just sit around doing the same old boring Th e above lines are examples of wha t someon e with the right shit, over and over again. Are you like that?" attitude might say.It's no t the lines themselves that are important, You don't want it to be explicit that you are screening her. Be very bu t the internal strength of frame. Whe n you have strong inner subtle, and she will realize it on her own accord (instead of thinking game, the right tilings will come ou t of your mout h automatically. that you are trying to make her feel screened.) Somewhere in Also not e that whe n you accuse her of being forward, or trying to her mind an attraction switch will flip and she'll think, "Hey, this get you into bed, this doesn't mea n it is true. It's no t you are guy is screening me to see if he wants to invest more."She deliberately misinterpreting the situation. Bu t if you r frame is naturally assumes that the man she is looking for will be selective. strong enough, she will get sucked in and respon d as though it is It's a behavior that she's been expecting and thus is a powerful true. Remember , she's programme d to respon d to high-value DHV . It sets the right frame, it's the signal she's been waiting for, guys. and it baits her to invest. Having Standards So ho w can you convey to he r that she is being screened." Her e i s wha t i t mean s i f yo u hav e n o standard s whe n i t By asking screening questions, by giving IOI s and IOD s at the come s t o women : right moments , and by actually having real standards about th e 1) I will take "whatever I can get (which is no t much.) kind of people you spend your time with. It has to be true for you 2) Ther e is nothin g special or unique abou t you, I settled for in order to can y the necessary congruence. you, because I have no sexual choice. I'm grateful just to find Intermittence someone wh o is willing to fuck a loser like me ; apparently that It is well-known amon g animal trainers that intermittent someone is you. rewarding is muc h mor e effective than consistent rewarding. The 3) Being wit h me makes you feel commo n and used.instead , i f principle derived is tha t IOIs , given to the target as a reward, yo u demonstrat e t o a woma n tha t yo u hav e standards , i t should no t be delivered in a predictable manner. Uncertainty convey s this: mus t be introduced to the equation, in order to mak e the 1) I have a lo t of choice whe n it come s to women . I am experience mor e emotionally compelling, so that she can feel accustomed to success with women . a broader range of hope , doubt, surprise, longing, fear of loss, 2) If I do take a liking to you, it is mor e than just for your looks. an d othe r drama.So the idea that we reward her with IOI s is It is because you are a special and unique person wh o lives up to only the simplest interpretation. In truth, we reward her my high expectations. investment with an intermittent an d unpredictable mix of IOI s 3) I will only be with a quality woma n an d that's what you are. and IODs . This hot/cold , push/pul l dynamic i s very Remember , wome n hav e antenn a for thi s sor t o f thing . emotionally stimulating. Whe n she is being rewarded in this The y ca n tell whic h wa y you lea n an d they will feel th e manner, she is mor e likely to chase and to comply with resultin g emotions .The average guy approaches a woman compliance tests. assuming that she is selective and hoping to pass her test. He The Hotseat Game thinks, "God you are so hot, do you have a boyfriend? Can I buy "What's your favorite color?" you a drink?" Because of this attitude, subtle cues in his behavior "What did you think of high school?" will convey entirely the wrong frame. She will pick up on this "What did you eat for dinner last night?" And so on. Make sure and lose interest.Correspondingly, the opposite is true if you have she gives you an answer and if not then say, "Yes, but that's not standards; subtle cues in your behavior will set the frame that you an answer to my question." That'll show her gently that you are in are a selective, high-value guy. She will pick up on this and gain charge. Now this isn't all of it but what you're doing here is showing interest. She expects that a guy with potential will be someone who a lot of interest. After all you are essentially giving her permission is selective. Here are some standards worth considering: to talk about herself. They get over any self-consciousness pretty An attractive woman who takes care of herself quickly by doing this, too. Plus, it gets them to open up and if they A woman wh o is sociable and has friends hit on something interesting then they'll maybe elaborate for A woman wh o has a real thirst for life. you. A woman who has a great energy and chemistry when the But as I said there is more to it After they relax after the first few two of you are together questions, you start throwing in some more personal ones such as: A woman wh o is not a flake "Have you ever been to the hospital emergency room?" A woman who is in touch with her own sensuality. She's "How old where you when you first got drunk?" not a baby anymore "Did you and your siblings keep secrets'?" A woman who can seek after her own fulfillment instead of "Ever bad a very rough breakup?" waiting for approval from her friends "What's your favorite food / vacation / place to visit" (use your A classy and smart woman with an education imagination) A woman who is adventurous and has a great imagination. Kino Escalation Screenin g Kino is an NL P term and is an abbreviation for kinesthetic, whic The idea is to get her hoping that she's good enough to qualify for h refers to the sense of touch. Whe n venusian artists (and NL P you. After all, you are a high-value guy. Sure, you're curious about geeks) speak of kino, they are referring to physical touching of her, but you want to know more. Is she smart? Does she have a any kind.An important principle in the game is that nothing is lot of friends? Does she have a good relationship with her family? ever a big deal. Th e typical chum p takes a girl ou t on a date an d then hopes to get th e kiss at the en d of the night. He wants Don't make excuses to show her ho w respectful he is. As the evening passes, he comes Don' t be tentative and wimpy abou t touching, be closer an d closer to that awkward momen t at the en d of the natural an d confident. Touchin g (guys and girls) is on e way night whe n he has to make the big move an d go in for the that alpha males like yo u demonstrate their dominance. kiss. This makes it a Big Deal.If the momen t of your first kiss Always be leading - one step at a time is weird an d awkward, it will probably also be your last kiss. Remembe r the principle that it is easier to condition people to Wome n are very unforgiving about this sort of thing. They have a jump into small, innocuous hoops . Without realizing it, they fall fantasy abou t meetin g the right guy, abou t ho w perfect it into your frame as your hoop s become larger an d mor e explicit will be and ho w everything will happe n so naturally an d so over time.Fo r this reason, whe n yo u d o the spin maneuver, yo u right. An d the trut h is, with guys wh o have game (read: don' t say, "O k I' m going t o spin you aroun d in a circle, let me practice), that's exactly ho w it does happen.Whe n tilings go dow n see your hand. " This is muc h too large of a hoop . Unless yo u the right way, there never is a "big moment " whe n you go in for have demonstrated a lot of value, girls will probably give yo u some the kiss an d "make it happen. " Instead, there is a natural trouble on this hoop ; it forces their egos to becom e involved. But How of kino from the very early stages of the set that instead you say, "G o like this " - [holding ou t your hand, leads all the way to sex. It should be seamless a series of then taking hers whe n she mimics you] "no w do a little spin" small, naturally executed moments , non e of whic h ever stick out [now spin her around.] See ho w each step is easy for he r to in any remarkable way. She feels like it's just ho w th e two of follow, bit-by-bit?In this way, lead he r throug h the entire you are together.Thus , the kino begins in the early stages of the interaction. set, an d escalates from there. One step forward, two steps back Imagine tw o jellyfish right near each other. A few of their While escalating, take on e step forward (metaphorically). At an y tentacles just barely brush against on e another. Tendrils curl and sign of hesitation or defiance, take two steps back. The n step touch, sliding off an d then touching again. More tentacles join the forward onc e again. Fo r example, if you take her hand , an d dance spontaneously. Larger number s brush against one another yo u sense any hesitation, thro w her han d away. Later whe n as a few begin to pull mor e strongly. Ther e is energy between you take it again, she will comply mor e readily. Th e principle is the two jellyfish; a powerful chemistry is building as they intertwine that the"tw o steps back " creates more discomfort than the an d draw closer.Tha t may be a strange picture. But the poin t is "on e ste p forward." Thus , the target become s mor e likely to that there is no single momen t whe n someon e makes a move. comply with future forward steps. Instead, there is this subtle, plausibly-accidental-yet- accelerating You be th e one to creat e th e tension , and you be th e one to danc e as the energy grows between them. It's this energy push it away"Baby, we've got to slow this down.." Some peopl e that's important. This vibe. This chemistry'.Th e innuend o an d thin k that it's the man' s job to escalate, and the woman' s job is the little hints an d touches at first serve to ad d playfulness to resist. Instead, think of it as if it is the man' s job to do both. If while creating plausible deniability. So do the touches create the you are constantly thing to get mor e kino, like getting yards on a vibe, or does thevibe create the touches? It is all part of a football field, it telegraphs far to o muc h interest an d deprive her snowballing an d sell-propelling system that feeds upo n itself an d of the hot/cold , push/pul l energy that she finds so compelling sparks like a tire. The n it grows an d become s clear that it is on Whe n yo u pull in close to a girl, there's this tension in the air. At between them. some point, if she feels to o muc h discomfort, she will pull away. This energy is what' s important, no t the physical touches. Th e This isn't wha t yo u want yo u don' t want to condition her int o physical touches are no t merely yards to be gained on a football a behavior of constantly pulling away from you. Rather, you wan t field in order to get closer to the goal. Rather, they are one her conditioned to chase after you. necessary piece to incorporate with various othe r tools to create So, onc e that tension has been created, it's no w time to push her a certain chemistry between you an d the target. Ther e away. This might be physically ("get off me , geez") or should be anticipation and tension in the air. emotionally, such as using a backturn, false disqualifier or som e Windows of Escalatio n other IOD . Yo u might frame it as thoug h you are the prize and As you game a girl as you demonstrat e value an d lack of you're not going to let her get anywhere with you tonight 'cause neediness, stimulate emotions, take control of the frame, make a you have work tomorrow.On e effect of this is that it spikes connection, and so on periodically a windo w of opportunity will attraction whe n you pus h he r away. She will respon d mor e ope n for yo u to escalate. If yo u miss the hint, an d that playfully to you now. Anothe r effect is that comfort is created. She windo w closes, you have just demonstrate d lower value and doesn't feel like you'r e trying to get something if you're constantly he r patience will wear thin. Enoug h missed opportunities and pushin g her away. This allows he r to feel safe while having fun she'll decide that you're either too chicken to make a move , or with you. She can allow the emotional stimulation to escalate you're incompeten t in carrying it out, or you are lacking in social instead of having to shut it off in self-defense. An d the pus h intelligence an d thus incapable of leading the dance. An y of those makes it that muc h mor e stimulating for her whe n you do pull he are DLVs . r back in.Fo r this reason, toss her han d away after thumb- So, if she is standing there, talking to you, just continue scalating. wrestling or palm-reading. Devise a kino routine where you Assume that it's on , always. Eve n if your assumption is wrong, it embrac e her for a few seconds of role-playing, and then pus h he will still result in the highest possible numbe r of lavs. It's also the r away. Mix signals.. .draw near to her saying that it would never best way to improv e you r calibration. An d once your calibration is wor k ou t between you, bu t stroke your finger dow n he r cheek tight, all of you r escalations will happe n smoothly, and that is at the same time. The n turn away. Us e body rocking m the long ter m goal anyway.Some forms of kino are: conjunction with IOIs , IODs , false- disqualifiers, role-playing, Ar m i n ar m stones, and so on.Someon e could easily spend weeks or month Hand s touching s playing with these ideas in the field. Ther e is so muc h to Embracin g explore. Embracin g "fro m behind " Kino Pinging Kissing lips Kino pinging is an expression of growing attraction between Kissing or nibbling on neck two people. Fo r example, if you pus h a girl's shoulder an d she Han d o n knee pushe s yours back, the two of yo u are kino pinging. Soon, people Sitting on lap will be telling the two of you to go find a room . It's an indicator Ar m aroun d waist as well as a generator of attraction. Usually this sort of thing Touchin g face starts with a little back-and-forth verbal jousting. It's very easy to Smelling or pulling hair ping a girl an d see if she will pin g bac kSometimes kin o pinging Han d o n ass is mor e fun whe n it's deliberately hidden from he r group. Non-Standard Touching This shows discretion, builds conspiracy, an d adds excitement. Whe n touching a girl's hand, you're not trying to set a frame tha t Takeaway s the two of yo u are explicitly hand-holding like a couple of Practice timing you r backturns an d othe r indicators of disinterest teenagers marking their territory. Instead, you might be reading to coincide with sparks of attraction. Just at the momen t whe her palm or thumb-wrestling wit h her, or showing he r some jive n she feels mos t emotionally stimulated or in nee d of handshake, or taking he r han d an d spinning her around. validation, yo u turn away slightly, causing he r to lean in a little What's importan t is that she becomes accustomed to your hand s more . "Wait, what you were saying about that little dog?" It takes touching this act should seem natural and normal to her. It practice to get the timing down . Remember, the attraction is only shouldn't seem like you're trying to get somewhere with her, like it a tool to be use d as bait.Whe n she pulls you back, yo u usually does whe n some guy wants to hold he r han d or pu t his intermittently reward her with IOIs . Isn' t it interesting that a arms around her. Instead, it's fun an d feels right as yo u takeaway is best don e just after a DHV , whe n the target has just create this comfort with your touch. experienced a spike in attraction? Tha t is the time that she is mos t likely to chase to get yo u back. Similarly, it's best to give an IO DL V Demonstration of lower value. (Other people do D just before escalating, since it makes it mor e likely that she will this, no t you.) accept the escalation. Fo r example, if yo u turn your back on he r IO I Indicator of interest. just before yo u kiss her, she will be mor e likely to accept the IO D Indicator of disinterest. kiss. These sorts of tilings must be experimented with in the field in CT Compliance test. Almost all interactions at some point order to be properly calibrated. Incidentally, this takeaway aspect come dow n to a test for compliance. Will you get of compliance or defiance? A3 corresponds to the third law of the Tao of Steve: Be gone. Following the illustration above, here is the way it goes after yo u This is a useful tim e to use sniper negs such as "eye boogers," "yo open: yo u IO D(neg, etc.) an d DHV , then wait for female IOIs . It u spit on me, " she respond s with IOIs , give he r a compliance test. (If instead "here's a napkin, " etc. Remember, yo u don' t get blamed for the she gives an IOD , then just repeat the process.) eye booger, Go d does. Yo u aren't trying to make her feel If she complies wit h your test, reward he r with IOI s an d the n embarrassed, it just happened. It is at this time that she wants to give he r another compliance test. As this cycle repeats, regain your respect, an d she wants to feel goo d again, so whe n compliance momentum is builtThis continues until yo u reach sex, you make your move , she won' t ge t all cocky an d pull away. whic h is somewhere aroun d 5 % compliance.(Yes, there are She'll accept it because she felt embarrassed an d go t all deeper levels of compliance than sex bu t they are no t the quiet. Of course, yo u don' t want to reward he r for being a subject of this book.)Comfort is no t only trust an d time it is goof, because that would be incongruen t So you am p up he r also compliance.If yo u ask a friend to do something for you, he is embarrassment by acting disinterested for a bit, then yo u play nice muc h mor e likely to do it than if yo u were to ask a rando m guy an d say, "Don' t be embarrassed for being human". . stranger. If you walk up to your girlfriend and kiss her, she will no .then you sto p being into the conversation for a bit. In that t only let you, she will pull you in an d kiss yo u harder. Why? It's state of mind, she is extremely susceptible to escalation. because yo u hav e a high level of compliance. Howeve r yo u Compliance have almost no chance of walking up to a stranger an d doin g On e concep t centra l t o th e Myster y Metho d i s this.Wh y do we say that compliance has momentum ? All compliance testing. Th e basi c idea is , yo u give he r a kino- compliance builds upo n itself. Someon e complying will relate d hoop . I f sh e complie s wit h you r move , several tiling continue to comply. Someon e defying will continue to defy s ar e accomplished : (1) Similar t o kin o pinging , i t i s a n IO I an d resent, an d take as attacks any attemp t to force her an d also create s attraction . (2) Yo u hav e escalated sh e to comply. Bu t onc e we have reached compliance threshold, it i s no w mor e comfortabl e wit h you r touch . (3) He r fram e takes very little effort to keep the compliance going. ha s further bee n influence d an d absorbe d b y you r own .S o i Negative Compliance Momentum f sh e complies , rewar d he r wit h a n IOI . O r bette r 10s will no t usually wan t to talk to yo u right off the opener. In yet, rewar d he r intermittently . Yo u migh t d o a complianc other words, they exhibit lo w compliance to your opener. So to e tes t wit h he r hand s an d the n thro w the m away. Bu t establish compliance, IO D them, DHV , then try openin g the m to the n he r nex t complianc e migh t b e rewarde d wit h a see if they will comply.This may no t be necessary if yo u already complimen t o r anothe r touch , o r b y turnin g t o face he r mor e have compliance. Fo r example, wha t happen s whe n yo u ope wit h a smile, etc . Thi s migh t b e followe d b y anothe r IO D t o n a set of 7s, an d immediately the girls are int o YOU, bu t then creat e mor e sexual tension . yo u ne g the m purely ou t of dogmatism? In an instant, th e Compliance Test lOls interaction goes sour.Why?It's because yo u have You take her hand and drop it... she grabs for it again established negative compliance momentum. You punished You squeeze her hand and she squeezes back them for goo d behavior.Th e same phenomeno n occurs whe n You touch her and she touches you back yo u reward or fail to punish ba d behavior. Eithe r way, Put her hand on your knee and see if she leaves it there negative compliance momentu m gets built up an d then works Put her arm in yours and walk her around the venue. Does he to your detriment. comply? Compliance Threshold Sit her on TOUT lap. She does? Whe n choosing to align with people, we comply with their When you are locked-in, take her hand and pull her in a requests to a certain threshold. Th e mor e value that you little closer as you are Talking at the same time. No w she is represent to a woman , the mor e she wants to align with you standing between your legs as you run game on her. the mor e leeway you have whe n escalating. By using IOD s to The Kino Test Routine punish defiance, an d IOI s to reward compliance, a venusian Hold out your hands in front of you, with your palms facing up. artist can quickly bring a woma n to the compliance threshold. The body language to her should communicate that you are Th e compliance threshold is the poin t of the interaction expecting her to give you her hands. This is a compliance test. wher e she realizes that she has mor e fun if she complies! If she gives you her hands, squeeze them, and see if she squeezes Onc e this happens, you have established control of the frame back. Then slowly lower them, and see if she follows the an d she will follow your lead. This should happe n in A2 or A3 . If movement in order to continue contact. in C1 you are still getting defiance, then you are not really in C1 at Try throwing her hands away after. all Try telling her she passed or failed. Do no t be afraid to overestimate your value. If yo u waste Try explaining the routine as you perform it o n her. time trying to build value that yo u already have, whe n yo u Try it as merely subtext while talking about something else. should instead be compliance testing, you could blow yourself ou t Try using this routine on the target as a way of defeating a of the set by creating negative compliance.On e venusian artist competing male who has invaded your set used to have a proble m with Southern girls, because they If she defies you r compliance test, give her an IOD , followed were so nice that he felt he wasn't sparking attraction, so he woul d by a DH V an d then another compliance test. Fo r example, it you over-neg to the poin t of obnoxiousness. Later he realized that ask a girl to stand up , she may refuse to do so. Sh e has refused those sets wer e already on, an d all he was doin g was creating your hoop . This doesn't look good ; it's a DL V to the group . Don' resistance to his compliance tests by punishing inappropriately t blame her maybe she's just no t attracted enoug h yet, maybe when he should have bee n escalating. the hoo p was to o big, to o early. So just be unaffected, do anothe Give-and-Take r DHV , and try another, smaller compliance test: "Show me Mutual compliance occurs in C1. In A2 , if she drops something, yo your hand" (Which can always be followed up by taking he r u bust on her for it. Yo u do no t give her any of your compliance han d an d saying: '"Ok now stand up for a sec...")Nearly yet. Howeve r in Comfort, if she drop s somethin g you will pick it everything is a compliance test. Putting her han d on your up for her. It is here that yo u sho w that you will comply for her. cock is a compliance test. Every escalation, every bounce or This is attractive as she wants someone to take care of her. She move , every touch, kissing, even sex itself. Whe n you're just doesn't wan t it until mid-game.Onc e in comfort, the venusian wonderin g ho w tilings are going with your current target, ask artist an d his target should bot h comply for each other all the wa yourself: How much compliance do I have? y to a mutual seduction. Having a girl undress you is better than Th e mor e value yo u have, the mor e shel l permit you to escalate you undressing her. If you get a girl to com e over and bring a your compliance testing. If you're a rock star, her rules will go right candle and then light it for yo u in he r bedroom , tilings are out the window . going to happe n the compliance makes it clear. Complianc e Momentu m It's also importan t to not e that her willingness to comply will be Ther e is a basic AIM mode l where people interact socially in directly affected by the congruence with which yo u deliver the five ways: compliance test. If yo u give her a compliance request and any DH V Demonstration of higher value. part of her senses that you cannot back it up , she will deny you. Do no t look for her approval or even her being "ok with it." Just "OM G you're French? That is so awesome. -> I can't even talk lead.Wha t are some othe r examples of gaining compliance? to you right now." Getting he r to invest. (She goe s to retrieve a drink for "OM G you're a dancer? That is so awesome. -> I can't even you, she spends som e money on you, etc.) talk to you right now." Getting he r to mov e with you or bounce to another location. Similar t o a n indicato r o f interest, whic h i s usually a subtl Locking he r in. Th e longer a girl wears an item of yours, the e cu e o f som e sort , a statement of interest is an mor e compliance you have. If the girl remove s your item, she is explicit verba l statemen t tha t make s clear you r defying. growin g interes t i n her . Fo r example : Social pressure. Ge t on e of he r pee r group to tell he r to "Yo u know , your first impression wa s kind of so-so. . .but no be nice to you, or to give you an accomplishment introduction, w that I get to kno w you, you are so incredible... " an d yo u will immediately gain muc h mor e compliance from her. Buy her a drink. People generally comply if it results in mor e fun, or "Whe n we met, you just seemed like another one of thos e gaining some benefit. We are inherently selfish. California blondie girls. But since I get to kno w you, I actually feel People will also comply if there is a threa t A ma n wit h a gu nervous aroun d you." n gets mor e compliance than on e with a hose.Of course the "OMG , I can't believe this. Like. Ca n you believe we me t at a venusian artist will never actually pull ou t a gun. Bu t there are bar?" ways to make her feel slightly threatened if she fails to comply. "We're going to sit dow n over there, would you like to join us? Fo r example: "Yo u kno w what; yo u are actually pretty cool, I' m curious Yo u can punis h her with freeze-outs every time she defies. abou t you." Basically any IO D will work. (When freezing her out, it's muc h "I have to hang ou t with you again sometime. -> Can you better to seem like you are becoming genuinely distracted you cook " do not wan t her to think that you're deliberately punishing her. A well-time d SO I ca n wor k wonders . See chapter 7.) Compliment s Yo u can walk off in the middle of her defiance and start a N o crap abou t "yo u are s o hot, " "Yo u are m y drea m girl," jealousy plotline in an adjacent set the n either wait for her to etc. I n othe r words , complimen t from a screenin g frame, no t a com e over or just wande r back after establishing ho w muc h begging frame. fun yo u can be. (See chapter 7 for mor e on freeze-outs an d Complimen t he r style, he r energy, he r poise, or somethin g jealousy plots.) uniqu e abou t he r outfit tha t she chose. He r shoes, her hair, an In early A2 , yo u can take all attention off of her an d d ONLY if yo u really like it an d thin k it deserves a compliment . use active disinterest, then compliance test again and IO I her for Thi s mean s don' t be tha t guy wh o i s constantl y complimentin complying. g girls o n their necklace. Lear n t o notic e things . Token Resistance Tr y using constructive criticism after makin g the compliment . At higher levels of escalation, such as kissing, your hands will be Thi s is a powerful wa y t o ne g he r an d demonstrat e value. moving muc h mor e freely aroun d he r body. (This is also a DON' T MENTIO N HER LOOKS. form of compliance testing.) Girls are programme d to give Hint: Try complimenting a girl in a way that directs her to behave Token resistance to physical escalation; it's an emotional response the way you want her to, and to play a role that's useful to you. to avoid feeling like a slut. She wants tilings to happen , bu t she A n exampl e o f this : "Yo u see m t o b e ver y connecte d wants it to feel right an d she doesn't wan t it to be her fault Fo r wit h you r emotions . Yo u see m t o really liste n t o you r example, if you pu t your han d on her leg an d leave it there, she woman' s intuition. " O r i f she' s bein g rude , o r i f yo u wan t ma y remove it. This is undesirable because you are no w using t o misinterpre t tha t she wa s rude , say, "You'r e to o classy t o her anti-slut defense to condition he r to pus h you away. ac t like this. " Jus t tell he r ho w yo u "view " her , an d sh e Bu t instead it yo u stroke your finger up her thigh as part of a will becom e tha t perso n for you , bu t onl y if sh e agree s an routine and then your touc h is gone , yo u have ende d d it is flattering for her . Yo u are buildin g a characte r for her , clean. She may even feel slight disappointment that the an d she will pla y th e rol e becaus e sh e like s th e wa y tha t touc h is gone. No w she is mor e being conditioned to feel th e rol e make s he r feel. Her e are som e examples o f dismay whe n your touc h is gone.She is also mor e accustomed compliments : to your touc h an d accepting of it. This works because of the "You seem like someone wh o really know s wha t she wants, I consistency principle. She didn't object because the touc h admire that." was already gone. Bu t by no t objecting, som e part of he r has "You really care about your friends. I be t you will make a tacitly accepted that it's no t objectionable. In the future she is really goo d mother. " mor e likely to be consistent with the behavior an d frame that 'Yo u have a goo d energy." she is already accustomed to whe n interacting with you. After all, "I notice you're the leader of your friends. Why is that? " she's no t a hypocrit e " You'r e a great conversationalist." Touching with Motion "You'r e a very classy girl. What are you doing in a place like Anothe r interesting aspect of that example is the motion this? " involved. Someho w moving your han d across her thigh is no t as "Wo w you seem so confident with you r friends, like you're objectionable as puttin g your han d on her thigh an d leaving it kinda the leader of your peer group. I just love your energy... -> there.Similarly, if you are ready to touch he r breasts outside Are you close with you r family?'" [Going into next routine.] her shirt (which is not usually an early par t of escalation bu t "You have such an expressive personality ... That's a valuable will eventually happen) the n yo u will gam compliance muc h thing in the entertainment industry. There are a million wome n wh easier if instead of just grabbing her boob , you stroke your o are beautiful; I just came back from Florida, bu t ho w many do han d across it as part of a larger petting motio n on her you think have an outgoing personality like yourself? I'm telling body, ending up somewhere else like her waist. This concept is you, that's a very attractive quality and a valuable asset." muc h easier to demonstrate in seminar tha n to describe in Bait - Hook - Reel - Release text. It's rust a way of escalating mor e smoothly, which she Th e "BaitHook-Reel-Release" metaphor is on e that will appreciate. Make her feel good. continually resurfaces in study of the game. On e way to apply it Qualifiers is in A3 . Yo u wan t to give IOI s to the target, bu t you don' t wan Periodicall y th e tim e come s t o let a gir l kno w sh e i s t to seem too easy. (Otherwise she won' t appreciate your pair qualifying for you . Sh e ha s t o feel like sh e i s winnin g yo bond ; instead she will enjoy your IOI s as a validation of he r u over , otherwis e she will ge t discouraged .Thes e lines sexual power, bu t she will lose attraction for you.) are onl y examples . Yo u coul d qualify he r eve n wit h Th e idea is to mak e the woman demonstrat e higher value you r bod y language . Tr y giving he r a n IOI . Tur n t o to you. Bait her into telling you interesting things about herself face he r whe n sh e says somethin g tha t yo u ca n (not "what do you dot") so whe n she replies (the hook) you misinterpre t a s bein g coo l an d worth y o f a n IOI .Often , it' s can IOI her (reel her in) only to pus h her off again usefu l t o follow a n IO I wit h a n IOD . Notic e tha t eac h (release her from the pressure of being hit on.) This process o f thes e qualifiers ha s a n optiona l disqualifier. repeats several times.Her e is an example for yo u to use in-field Statement s of Interes t (SOI) right awayYou : [Bait] Wha t nationality are you? "You are SO adorable...-> it's sickening." Her : [Hook ] French . You : [Reel] Seriously? No WAY!!! Th e "You know, you can be pretty interesting sometimes." girl I had the biggest crush on in high school was French! [Release "You're awesome! .. .Sort of ] I can't even talk to yo u now . "It's weird.. .I feel so good around you."[False disqualifier] Ever y time she gives you a demonstration of higher value, "Too bad you're not my type." yo u indicate your interest to her. Thi s way she will believe your "You're pretty... -> but you're EVIL." IOIs , an d whe n yo u fully SO I her, she will feel like she really deserves it. This allows your attraction for her to legitimately Whe n you first ope n he r set, yo u are just some guy. She has gro w over several minutes instead of just IOIin g he r because she no reason to perceive you as having any mor e value than first IOI'd you. that. She sees herself as the prize. An important aspect of the Mystery Metho d is to restructure A1-Except. . .hm m you are dressed well, an d have goo d body routines to be in context with YOUR IDENTITY in particular. language, no t needy, an d interesting... Tak e the time to write up some personalized routines with this A2-No w yo u are demonstrating value. Othe r girls are in mind. Again, make yours congruent with your identity. Yo u do touching you and then yo u neg her! She starts to give no t have to be a magician to do the Mystery Method , bu t you do IOIs , which yo u exploit need a strong identityHer e i s a n exampl e o f this, usin g She DHV s t o wi n your affections. Yo u respon d with Mystery' s identity: intermittent IOIs , compliance tests, an d hoop s as she Mystery : "I f yo u coul d b e anythin g i n th e worl d wit h n o "wins you over." chanc e o f failure, wha t woul d yo u wan t t o be ? An d don' t say A 3-No w tha t she has indicate d he r interest i n yo u (A2) an d 'Princess ' haa. " Girl : "Urn , a n actress. " yo u hav e indicate d you rinterest in he r (A3), she is investe d in Mystery : "Really? Whe n I wa s little I wante d t o gro w u p an d this interactio n an d is probabl y trying to build comfor t wit h you, b e a magician . An d yo u kno w wha t I a m now ? A magician ! o r wishin g yo u woul d make it happen . S o yo u wan t t o b e a n actress. I' m living proo f tha t ou r C1-Yo u no w hav e mutua l respect , investment , an d attraction. dream s ca n com e true. I t woul d b e s o coo l i f yo u wer e a n Mov ehe r t o a location wher e the tw o o f yo ucan b e mor e actress . I lov e that! W e nee d t o figur e ou t ho w t o mak isolated together, an d build comfor t with her. e tha t happen . I be t you' d b e a n amazin g actress . Bu t Chapte r Six Revie w wha t i f yo u ge t mor e attentio n tha n I ? I can' t eve n han g In the A3 phase, you bait a woman into working for your ou t wit h yo u now.' affections. As she becomes invested in the interaction, you 1Th e BaitHookReelRelease metapho r perfectly reward her and the cycle repeats. matche s th e A 3 proces s descnbe d i n thi s chapter , The Frame is the context, usually assumed and unspoken, whethe r applie d t o screening , hoops , kin o escalation o r that provides meaning to the content and the interaction He who complianc e testing. Her e ar e som e example s o f this: controls the frame controls the communication itself. Bait Challenge her/Hoo k - She DHV s for you /Reel Give her If your frame is strong enough, you can get away with an SOI/Release False disqualifier anything. You can use any opener, any line, any spontaneous Bait Give her a compliance test/Hook - FAILURE; she defies/ attitude, and it will work but you must be congruent. Release Give her an IO D/ The field will give you the answers that you seek. Go, and be Bait DHV in some way/Hoo k She gives IOI s/Reel Kino in the field, and listen to your intuition there. Over time you escalation/Release Throw her hand away will calibrate. Bait Give her a compliance test Hoo k -/SUCCESS; she complies/ Women and men will play frame games on you and test you Reel Kino escalation./Release - Push her away for congruence. Women are seeking a strong mate and men Bait Ask her a screening question/Hoo k She qualifies herself are testing for dominance. Often this is unconscious and to you /Reel - Give her an IOI/Release False time constraint instinctive behavior. Bait - DHV, men takeaway/Hoo k - She chases, for example There are all sorts of hoops that people will produce to she quickly finds a way to prolong the conversation/Reel see if you will jump into their hoop. Don't. Instead, bait them to Give her a qualifier/Release Give her an IO D jump into your hoops. Bait Give her a hoop to jump into/Hoo k She jumps into your Don't go off the deep end and respond to every social hoop/Bait Give her a compliance test/Hoo k She complies/Reel interaction like it's a power play for dominance and like - Compliment her/Release Tease neg you are so clever for recognizing it. You will turn into a social Th e bait can be a challenge, a screening question, a compliance robot and will lose your ability to vibe naturally with people. Be test, a takeaway, a hoop , or so on . THESE ARE ONLY relaxed and enjoy the process. EXAMPLES. Th e truth is that bait can be anything. It can be a Feel free to jump into someone's hoop if you can first make subtle cue in your bod y language. It can be an allusion to a them jump into one of yours. tempting bounce , giving her an opportunity to sho w interest in The more obvious it is that it's a hoop, the less likely it joining you. Find what works for yo u using experimentation an d becomes that someone will jump into it. field-testing. A useful frame is where you are the person in the interaction You : "How old are you? "Her : "23 , ho w about YOU?'' (Hook!) with more value, not her. This isn't explicitly communicated, but You : (ignoring her question) "Hol d ou t your hand."Her : you imply it with your assumptions, in a fun way. (She complies spin her.)You : "Ho w graceful! I bet you When using this sort of material, remember that what's were a balletgeek"You : (Hold ou t hands , expecting hers.) really important is the inner game. With practice, your internal Her : (Complies and gives you her hands. Hook!) You : (While frame will become congruent and comfortable with spontaneous talking about unrelated material, do the kino test.)Her : (She interaction as well as canned material. squeezes back.)You : (Continue talking an d throw her hands You must have standards about what sort of woman away.)/ you want to be with. This will be communicated in your You : wha t d o you wan t t o b e whe n you gro w up?"Her : "I frame through many subtle cues in your body language and wan t to be a teacher.. .I' m studying education at XY speech. Z school " (Hook!)You : "Wo w that's a goo d schoo l This is funny, One way to do this is to screen her by asking her certain thought you were like these other girls; I gave you way insufficient questions. Calibrate gently you don't want her to think this is a credit. I bet you'd be really good working with children; you'll tactic to flip her attraction switch. (The standards must be real.) probably make a great mothe r someday. To o bad you're totally Intermittent rewarding is more effective than consistent no t my type. You'r e a coo l girl; we should find you someone rewarding. Use IOD s to add a hot/cold, push/pull dynamic when tonight "/ you are stimulating and rewarding the target. You : (Finishing a DHV )Her : "So what's your name? " (IOI) There is a natural flow of kino from the very early stages of You : (ignoring he r question) "Are you an intuitive person? " the set that leads all the way to sex. Nothing is ever a big Her : "Yes very muc h so!" (Hook!) You : "Let me see your hand. " deal, there is never any "big move" it's just how the two of you Her : (She complies.)You : (Stroking your finger dow n her are when you are together. palm.)"Interesting... " (Throw he r han d away.) Take aways, properly timed, will condition her to chase. Her : "Wait, what ? Can yo u read palms?" (Chasing) You : (Taking Don't compliment a woman on her looks. Don' t mention her he r han d again.) "See this line? This is the retard line, it means looks. you're a retard." (Hu g her.)/ Almost all interactions at some point come down to a test for You : "So tell me , wha t are your three best qualities?" compliance. Will you get compliance or defiance? Her : "Well, I' m loyal, I' m smart... " (Hook!) You : (Interrupting) Compliance momentum can be built by "Ca n yo u cook?"'Her : "O h yeah I can coo k all kinds of rewarding "good" behavior using intermittent IOIs and punishing stuff."(Hook!)You: (Smiling approvingly) "That' s so cool, it "bad" behavior using IODs. A venusian artist will continue seems like everyone eats TV dinners these days. I have to go in compliance testing all the way up to sex. a minute, bu t I was wondering... "(G o into next routine.)/ The compliance threshold is the point where she realizes You : (Finishing a DH V an d body rocking away...) Her : "So wait that she benefits more if she complies. sec, wha t ever happened to that dog? " (Hook!)You : (Rocking Bait-Hook-Reel-Release is a metaphor used to describe back) "Yo u kno w what, you're soadorable.. .it's sickening!"/ the application of compliance testing, screening, qualifiers, and Her perceptio n of th e picku p in term s of socia l statu s other aspects of A3. Chapter 7 C1 : Comfort and Conversation Style's Kiss Tactic A wide conversational rapport When sitting arm-in-arm with your target, lean in and smell her A sense of comfort and trust hair and say, "You smell so flacking good, Fi n trying so hard not to A sense that this interaction is real and genuine kiss you right now. . . "Then, push her off you and say, "No w get A feeling of connection off of me." At this point, do a slight freeze out/IO D and wait for There are several elements that need to be added to the mix at her to give you an IOI. If you did everything correctly up to this this point. Althoug h you an d your target hav e bot h indicated point, she will give you an IO I by re-initiating kino with you. After interest in each other, YOU hav e still only know n each other she does, lean in and kiss her.You'll know that she is ready to be for five or ten minutes. You rinterest is based purely on the kissed after she IOIs you, because you verbalized that you wanted attraction switches flipped. By baiting her to invest further, you no to kiss her, and her IOIing you is a way of accepting this w have an opportunity to build comfort an d trust with her. An d verbalization. that is what actually gets the girl the game is played in Th e above routine is a very goo d example of many of the comfort. Everything else was merely to get to this point. principles of MM (kino escalation, compliance, punishment/reward If it has no t already been demonstrated that the tw o of you ca n , etc.) working in conjunction with on e another. See ho w the have a normal, fun, natural conversation together, this is the time woma n enjoys this process whe n it unfolds?Whe n you lean in to to do so. In the future, whe n she is deciding whether or no t to smell her hair, yo u are giving he r an IOI , bu t you also do no t retur n your phon e call, yo u don' t wan t he r thinking, "Geez wan t to make he r uncomfortable by escalating to o fast. all we really had to talk about was dog food and petting our dogs, Therefore, you pus h her off of you. This in turn makes her we didn't really connect on a conversational level. Plus I made out uncomfortable. She notices that she is mor e uncomfortable no t with him so I know he's going to want more of that, but I don't having kino with you than she was whe n she ha d kino with even know this guy.. .it was fun at the time but I just don't feel you, so she re-initiates kino. The n whe n you lean in to kiss her , comfortable with this right now. There are a million guys; I'll meet this is an IOI Thu s you are rewarding he r goo d behavior (her another hot guy tonight whenI'm out with my girlfriends." kinoing you), and encouraging mor e such behavior as tilings This is exactly wh y so man y phon e number s are flakes no t progress.This is ho w a venusian artist uses the on e step forward enoug h comfort. Thus , it's importan t to have fun, natural two steps back principle t o get th e gir l t o chase him. conversations with girls, using wide rappor t and multiple Comfort Building Locations conversational threads. Whe n she looks back on that Th e location in whic h yo u first mee t a woma n is no t conversation, she should be thinking abou t ho w she enjoys necessarily favorable to building comfort . Th e music ma y b talking with yo u an d looks forward to doin g so again. e to o lou d for length y comfor t building dialog. Th e crow d Also, there must be a sense that this interaction is real and ma y b e to o congested . You r romanti c interest' s protectiv genuine. Often this is the reason wh y wome n are distrustful o e friends, curren t boyfriend, jealous ex-boyfriend or family f "nice guys." Ho w doe s she kno w h e isn't just pretending to member s ma y be present . Yo u o r sh e ma y also lack th e be nice in order to get into her pants? Sure, he's buying dinner immediat e tim e t o spen d 7 hour s building enoug h comfor t and telling her she's pretty.. .but is that wha t he's really like? Or is wit h each other .I f th e meetin g locatio n doe s no t allow yo that just wha t he's like whe n he wants something? u th e time no r afford a comfortabl e setting t o sit wit h he r By demonstrating a willingness to walk, or to step up and call an d build comfort , yo u mus t mov e he r from the meetin g bullshit in a fun way, you demonstrate that yo u are bein g location to a comfor t location.All comfor t building locations are genuine with her, whic h creates trust, allowing her to feel safe. marke d by mor e quiet an d secluded (thoug h often still This is what girls mean whe n they say they wan t a ma n wh o can public) settings wher e you, you r romanti c interest an d he r keep it real. She needs to feel that she is getting to kno w the real friends (as well as you r friends) ma y share in length y dialogue. youand that takes time.Whe n you first gam e a girl, she is being Ther e are thre e types o f comfor t building locations that yo u stimulated and having fun with you. If don e in a competen t an d you r romanti c interest will visit. Mystery has name d thes e manner, mos t wome n enjoy it at the time. Bu t for her to C1 , C2 , an d C3 . consider dating yo u in the future, she mus t no t only be invested, Three Comfort Building Locations Types bu t she mus t feel that there is a real connection between YOU. C1=Any comfort building location within the meeting She mus t see yo u as someon e wh o could really becom e a part location. of her life and mor e importantly, that she could become a part C2=Any comfort building location separate from the of your life. She wants someon e wh o is similar to her in various meeting location and the sex location ways. Someon e wh o looks like a goo d counterpart, that othe r C3=Any comfort building location within the sex peopl e would say,"O h you look like such a great couple!" She location. wants someon e that her friends like; someon e she can sho w off Th e Five Locatio n Type s fo r Gamin g on social occasions; someon e that she understands an d Th e fiv e location s are the Meetin g Location , C1 , C2 , empathizes with.Whe n she remember s you, does she feel a C3 , an d the Sex Location. Th e C 1 locatio n exists genuine connection? Or are you just some guy she ha d a few somewher e withi n th e meetin g location durin g the picku p laughs with while drinking at a bar on e night? stage, while th e C3 location exists within the sex location durin Th e Freeze-Out g the seductio n stage. Whe n YOU are in the attract phase, YOU can bust her balls whe n Her e is on e way to loo k at it: she busts yours. Bu t once yo u reach comfort, if she busts on Pickup(Meeting Location= C1)=>Mid-game(C2)=>End-game(C3 you, yo u can only freeze-out by withdrawing attention. She will =Sex location) say, what' s wrong? " Yo u say, "Nothing." (Not sulking! The Ther e are several reason s for this design structure: delivery must be sincere, like it's really no big deal)Then , after Movin g onl y a few feet from the meetin g location to she is punished by your silence for an awkward moment , the C1 location carries with it muc h less of a safety risk for a return to comfort by finding something to IO I he r for.She learns woma n wh o has just me t yo u an d i t thu s help s kee p he r i n quickly no t to bust on yo u because, (1) you've already prove n social homeostasis . that you can bust back (in attract phase) an d (2) she feels It is muc h less of a persona l investmen t in getting to kno discomfort wheneve r she busts on YOU. This is your opportunity to w you , a relative stranger, tha n jumpin g directly to a C2 sho w he r YOU aren't always an asshole like you were in attract locatio n withou t establishing at least som e comfort . phase .So f reeze-out s are a way to train her. Yo u can use Because it's a smaller hoop, she's more likely to do it. discomfort sparingly to teach her that being nice to yo u means Movin g t o a C 1 location allows yo u the opportunit y t o comfort an d fun. Whe n the time has com e to build comfort, make he r feel comfortabl e enoug h so you ma y successfully it's counterproductive to continue being cocky an d ball busting. jum p to a C2 location wit h her. Th e punish/rewar d dynamic mus t b e use d instead. Movin g only a few feet from th e C3 location to th e sex This phase is also your opportunity to demonstrate that yo u location is muc h mor e practical tha n havin g he r kno w i n th e C are capable of making uncomfortable situations comfortable 2 locatio n tha t yo u are plannin g on taking he r directly to a sex again. The use of sniper negs is great here, like saying, "you locatio n wit h only on e 'naught y thoughty ' o n you r mind . have somethin g on your nose " an d handing her a tissue. Going from the meeting location to a C1 location, or from the C3 She feels uncomfortable but it's not your fault, it's God's . Right location to the sex location is called moving. Going from C1 to C2, after this, she will feel so small After she notices that you are from C2 to another C2, or C2 to C3 is called jumping. freezing her ou t a bi t (not as if you're being cruel, bu t rather as Th e C1 Location if you aren't interested in her), give he r a compliance rest an d Any comfort building location within the meeting then reward her compliance wit h an IOI In this wa y yo u location.Unles s your romanti c interest is already sitting in a are can continue rewarding her, bu t only for compliance and no t quiet area within the meetin g locatio n yo u will inevitably hav misbehavior. e to move from the meetin g location t o C1 .In fact, before yo u even approac h a woma n in a meetin g locatio n yo u Mos t peopl e wh o d o this are seeking attention. It's cool mus t hav e a nearb y C1 comfor t building locatio n pre- to get attention, but it's very uncool to be perceived as seeking it. selected so yo u ma y be prepare d t o mov e t o it.C1 Thus , don' t provok e peopl e or sho w off to the m in any way. examples: Practice movin g you r target an d getting he r int o isolation Leaning up against wall or bar with woman leaning in and for comfort-building. facing you Demonstrate vulnerability and establishcommonality Sitting on stool by bar with woman standing between your legs and connection. Sitting in quiet area of club or coffee shop Practice stacks of canne d material. Thi s is a useful skill. Unles s your meetin g location is already a goo d C1 location, Als o practice natural, spontaneou s conversations wit every successful picku p will inevitably require yo u to move to a h n o canne d material. C1 location. Practice using Multiple Conversational Threads . Moving to C1 Continually escalate kin o an d use compliance T o move means , t o g o from the meetin g location t o C 1 testing. wit h you r romanti c interest an d he r friends if necessary- Fo r thos e readers verse d i n NLP , this phas e is a goo (Movin g also mean s goin g from th e C3 location to th e sex d tim e to practice you r patterning. location, whic h we'll examine in a later chapter.) Movin g is no t Cu t borin g threads , yours o r hers . Lea d the frame. only a logistical necessity, bu t is also a powerful comfor t builde r Talk abou t run, interesting, emotionally compelling topics. in-and-o f itself. Don' t ask a bunc h o f questions. The y don' t ad d Meet Location to C1 Move value an d they com e off rapport-seeking. Instea d o f Example :Mystery is speaking to a beautiful woma n by th e asking he r wher e she's from, mak e a guess. She'll ask yo u bar of a busy nightclub. Before even approachin g th e woma n i wh y yo u guessed Arkansas , you'll give he r a reason, an d n this meetin g location h e ha d his gam e plan already in mind : she'll giggle whethe r yo u wer e right or not . movin g her to th e quiet smokin g section; a goo d C1 (You d o wan t he r t o contribut e an d invest 111 the location. H e place s his ha t o n he r an d says, "I' m conversation. Bu t yo u wan t he r to do so becaus e she is goin g t o sho w yo u som e thing really neat. Com e join me fo attracted, no t because yo u are forcing th e r a sec."Th e woma n replies, "Wher e are w e going? ""It' s a conversatio n alon g wit h lots o f questions. Yo u mus t special little place I like to call .. . You'll See, " he laughs , ad d value.) pointin g toward s the smokin g section. "Just righ t there. " He B e agreeable. Yo u don' t always hav e t o b e right. begins walkin g off a few feet. Don' t take yourself to o seriously. Fo r example, While she is hesitan t to leave he r friends even for "a sec, " sh e is don' t us e disagreement unless yo u nee d t o enforce mor e ap t to join hi m becaus e h e has locke d he r i n wit h his a frame. If you'r e arguing abou t somethin g yo u probabl y hat. Thoug h sh e doesn' t even smoke , she has to at least take care to o much . Remembe r wh y you'r e here. a few steps forward to retur n hi s hat. Rapport doesn' t mea n boring Th e vib e yo u created i n Wha t ar e yo u gonn a sho w me? " sh e ask s curiousl y a s th e Attrac t stage shoul d still be simmerin g just belo w h e grab s he r han d an d lead s he r throug h th e crowd . the surface. If it isn't, the n yo u probabl y mad e M 3 "Ar e yo u creative? " Myster y ask s back , keepin g he r curious Sequencin g Mistake #2 : Comfort but with no Attraction. Whil e the y move , h e doe s a subtl e interest test o n her . H Practice you r grounding routine,whic h will be e gauge s he r interes t level s b y loosenin g hi s gri p a s the covere d in this chapter. y walk . Doe s sh e hol d hi s han d tightl y still o r le t g o o f The Question Game hi s hand:" I wan t t o see ho w creativ e yo u ar e befor e I "Have you ever played the question game? Well there are rules... sho w you, h e say s a s h e pull s ou t a pa d o f pape r an "Rule 1, yo u ask a question, the n me , then you, and so on , back d pe n an d hand s the m t o her . Reachin g th e smokin g and forth."Rule 2, you have to tell the truth, the whol e truth, and section , the y sit togethe r an d h e place s he r han d o n hi s nothin g bu t th e truth. Like truth or dare bu t withou t the dare kne e an d let s go . Doe s sh e leav e i t there ? Thi s i s anothe r because I don' t kno w ho w weird you really are." [Notice the subtl e test . neg.]"Rule 3, yo u can't ask the same question that's already been H e lean s bac k an d says, 'It' s quiete r ou t here . Ok , I asked."Rule 4, you have to ask questions that let skeletons ou t of nee d yo u thin k u p a lis t o f 1 0 rando m words , bu t the y the closet. Tak e advantage of our anonymity."O h and. . .Rule 5, can' t hav e an y associatio n wit h an y othe r wor d yo u com e you go first." She will say, "that's no t fair."So you then ask, "Ho w u p with. "An d so , wit h a successfu l mov e (an d a n many boyfriends hav e you had?" isolatio n fro m he r friend s a s wel l i n thi s case ) fro m Fro m here on, the question gam e will escalate sexually until she is th e meetin g locatio n t o C1 , h e i s abl e t o begi n asking you ho w many times you masturbate. It's a fun routine. Thi buildin g comfort , i n thi s cas e b y demonstratin g hi s s is a comfort building routine that's also useful for screening. photographi c memor y usin g The Peg System an d the n Anothe r great thing abou t the question game is that it can last for teachin g i t t o her .Som e isolation lines: a really long time. Whe n you get into C1, use this routine as your "Let's see wha t adventure awaits us in that room. " (Put he default.Fu n question: "Tell me a secret." r on your arm, promenade-style.) Really - Be Talkative "He y gays, I' m going t o borro w your friend for a sec, we'll It' s vitally importan t t o b e talkative. It' s easy t o say i t bu t be right there o n the couch. " actually tr y i t fo r a few month s o f practice . I f yo u hav e s "I' m going to show you something really neat, com e with o much t o talk about , an d yo u bombar d he r (o r he r set) me. " wit h lot s o f fun an d interestin g conversation , showin g " I want t o introduce you t o m y friend, com e wit h humor , opinion , an d passion , the n yo u ge t t o conve y you r me. personality.Th e talkative perso n just gets laid way mor e often. "Yo u have got to mee t my friend." Th e secre t i s t o pu t yoursel f i n a talkative mood . Hav e yo "Let's go get a drink " u eve r bee n i n one r Clos e you r eyes fo r a momen t an d "O k stand up. No w give m e your arm, promenade-style. remembe r wha t i t wa s like a t th e time . Lookin g bac k o n all No w com e here for a sec.. . th e girls Myster y ha s bee n with , h e jus t talked thei r ears "You r friend and I kinda like each other, are you cool off. The n after h e sa w positiv e bod y languag e an d othe r wit h that?" ("Uh, I guess...'' ) IOI s h e woul d com e ou t o f th e blu e an d say, "Woul d yo "Is it ok if I borro w your friend for a second?" ("Uh I u like t o kiss me? "That' s i t h e woul d just talk guess; if it's ok with her..." ) passionatel y abou t something. . .talk an d talk. H e wouldn' t "I like your friend. Is it alright if I talk to he r for a talk abou t her . H e wouldn' t as k questions . H e wouldn' t really minute? " ("I guess; if it's ok with her..." ) expec t he r t o say anything . I f sh e want s t o join in, great , - > "Grea t the n wel l b e righ t back. " bu t otherwise , wh o cares? H e doe s it all.' Conversational Rapport Talkin g is a Logistica l Tool Be a talkative person . Talk to anybody, no t just girls. Ge t Ther e is another benefit to talking it occupies the conscious into th e zone . mind. Imagine that you're talking to your friend. Yo u bot h Don' t explicitly try t o impres s o r sho w off. Don' t get int o his car, continuing your conversation, an d he directly tell impressive facts abou t yourself. Don' t seek drives you to the beach. Fro m your perspective, yo u were attention, approval, o r understandin g from others . Ho t wome having this conversation; sights were flying by, and voila! You'r e n are already bothere d enoug h b y guvs wh o are at the beach. It's like magic the conversation was the opiateTh e worrie d wha t she thinks. Tr y bein g the on e guy wh o isn't. pickup should be the same way. She is talking to you; everything Don' t talk abou t weird, creepy, o r stupid topics. feels so fun, comfortable an d natural. Th e conversation continues to flow voila! She's having sex. Like magic! He r conscious min d should be constantly occupied by you.Nothin g ruins the moo d your target. Be warned: this is exactly the sort of thing that would like a long, quiet car ride back to the house. . .or a lon g quiet look try-hard if yo u wer e doing it to o early in your set.Tip: Have walk back to the car. Talking an d keeping the flow is necessary to your pivot stop by and mention what a cute couple you and your overcome logistical difficulties that inevitably will arise. target make. On e easy way to create a conspiracy is to play The Photo Routine games that involve you an d the target having a secret Preparation :Take pictures of yourself in interesting situations. together against someon e else for example, girls love Active shots you doing fun tilings. Goofing off at your workou t people-watching. Try this game: place. You rock climbing. Yo u partying with friends and girls. Yo u Murder / Marry / Shag in mid-air while roller-blading. Th e 'bear shit' from the bear yo u A s yo u pu t he r o n you r arm , promenad e -style, yo u say, "Ok bumpe d into while hiking. Etc . Th e best photo s will convey value , we'r e goin g t o play a gam e called murder/marry/shag. I as well asyour identity. Als o include a couple boring or out-of-focus will poin t ou t thre e guys in the crowd . Yo u hav e to tell me pictures for realism. Pu t these photo s in a developing envelope, as whic h on e 3*011 woul d murder , whic h on e yo u woul d marry, thoug h you just picked the m up from the store today where they an d whic h on e yo u woul d shag an d the n yo u hav e t o tell were developed, and you happe n to har e themwith you. m e why. "After this happens , i t i s no w he r turn . Continu e Performance :While in set, use the envelope as a lock-in prop on walking aroun d th e venu etogethe r a s she picks ou t three girls. the target, while alsodemonstrating higher value to the set. If she Whic h on e woul d yo u murder , whic h on e woul d yo u many , tries to open the envelope, swat her han d and call her nosy. an d whic h on e woul d yo u shag? . . .An d why ? ("Geez is she always like this?" Etc.)Whe n the time come s to Vulnerability engage the target directly with A3 and C1, you can decide to "b e Whe n people share vulnerabilities with each other, it nicer" to he r and sit dow n with he r to go throug h the pictures. demonstrates (and creates) an emotional connectio n between Fo r each picture, tell a story . Durin g this time yo u can them. It's on e of those tilings that, if don e to o soon, will come demonstrate pre-selection, social proo f an d other DHVs , build off like yo u are trying too hard to gain rappor t with he r a DLV . comfort, an d you can also engage he r in a fun dialogue where she So don' t be Captain Sensitive whe n you first mee t her. But contributes and invests. You r stories will remind her of he r used at the right time, sharing vulnerabilities is a powerful ow n stories and she will tell one to you. Practice your comfort builder.Di d she tell you somethin g personal abou t spontaneous conversations. This way, you will always have a herself? Di d she tell yo u a secret? The Question Game is very thread to go back to an d a ne w story with each picture. I have it useful for this sort of sharing. It's also possible to structure on goo d authority that Mystery himself swears the Phot o Routine stones to make the reveal of vulnerability appear to be accidental. is the best routine ever made. Some examples of field-tested vulnerability stories: Commonality Tell all embarrassing story. Hin t Cosmo Confessions is a Th e old saying opposites attract notwithstanding, people tend to treasure- trove of material be mor e attracted to those who m they consider to be similar to First kiss experience (childhood regression) themselves in some way. Th e mor e that yo u both have in Your pet died because you were too small to take care of it commo n with each other, the mor e he r serendipity chip will Your little girl cousin fell down the stairs "and I don' t be activated to let he r kno w that this was meant to be.She know what I would have done if things had gone ba d that day, needs to be able to imagine you as a realistic addition to he r I love that little girl...so... much" everyday life. Sure she enjoyed being entertained by yo u at the The story of your father dying and maybe some long- club. Bu t that is a fantasy world. In real life, would the tw o of you simmering drama finally reaching closure fit? Would your respective social circles be compatible?Be careful: Tell her about your childhood. if it looks like yo u are fishing for commonalities in an effort to Talk about the cutest little baby that you just saw and it ingratiate yourself with her, it makes you look desperate. Ther e reminded you of your little sister when you were a kid are, however, ways to share commonalities that aren't try-hard. Fo Reveal an insecurity and tell the story behind it r example, this classic Mystery Metho d game: Tell her a secret. She'll be more likely to share one of her The Music Game own. Thi s game i s very simple: share wit h eac h othe r thos e tilings Do no t whine about your ex- girlfriend. An d don't tha t yo u like. Fo r example, nam e a ban d yo u enjoy, an d the n linger on sad emotions. Stimulate her sad strings and then say "you r turn. "She ma y no t play along: " I don' t really like that move on to another one of your multiple threads band. "You : "Just makin g conversation.'' (Tur n away a bit. . So muc h unattractive behavior comes from a desire to avoid .slight freeze-out.) Her : "So. . .what else d o yo u listen tor " vulnerability. Th e secret is to embrace you r vulnerability an d still Yo u proceed : "I like. . .Pearl Jam. . .it's my favourite ban d of th e be unaffected. It's ok to be wrong. It's ok to laugh at yourself nineties. I really like tha t son g 'Garden, ' I remembe r makin g ou sometimes. Thin k abou t it: if you're sensitive abou t her seeing t wit h m y high-schoo l crus h t otha t song. . .bu t I digress. Ok , that you're wrong, the n it obviously matters to yo u wha t she no w it's you r turn. "Her : "Ok. . . I like. . .Ray Charles. . . I've thinks. Bu t I thought you were unaffected? So the next time yo u always love d 'Georgi a o n m y Mind. ' Di d yo u see that movi e tell the story of whe n yo u fought a lion with your bare hands, abou t him? "You : "Yea h I just saw that th e othe r nigh t i n remembe r that it's mor e attractive - and interesting to admit fact. H e has on e o f the mos t beautiful voices I've ever heard. yo u were scared shitless than it is to play Mister Toug h Guy. Wo w I' m kind of impressed ; Ra y Charles. I totally gave yo u Punishment / Reward insufficient credit. Yo u hav e goo d taste i n music. "Her : "Why , Yo u can't do a freeze-out unless she want s your attention in the than k you. "You : "O k m y turn. . . I like. . Tool. "Her : " I lov e first place. Doin g a takeaway on someon e wh o cares less isn't a Tool ! I'v e bee n int o the m since their firs t CD. "You : "N o way, takeaway at all. It only works whe n you are of value to he r an d yo u like Tool ? No t to o man y girls are int o them . Yo u know , I whe n she says or does something negative you then remove your remembe r whe n thei r last C D cam e out . I was... " (Tell a attention, to make he r feel lonely. She feels bad an d know s she story.) ". . .So I neve rsaw tha t girl again, bu t I still hav e that would prefer talking to yo u so that is wh y a freeze-out works. seashell she gave me whe n it rained. Ok.. . no w it's you r turn. Early in the set whe n she is bad, yo u tease her and frame control. Conspiracy Bu t in C1 yo u don' t wan t to go backwards in the set. So give a Imagine that you're gaming a girl. Th e tw o of yo u are sitting on slight IOD . Perhap s you stop talking to he r for a moment , or a couch, isolated from her friends wh o are no w out on th e dance you tur n away, or just barely shift your body language. It floor. Yo u suggest a bounce next doo r for a piece of pizza.Her e doesn' t take much , wome n are very sensitive. Remember , yo u on the couch , you're someon e she has just me t an d sat dow n to aren't communicating anger, merely a slight disinterest.In this way, talk with for a few minutes. She's still here with he r friends. But the 'punishment ' is actually just a quick, sharp correction, like in once the tw o of you step inside the pizza joint, you are there do g training. It's no t personal and you're no t angry. Yo together. Ther e is a powerful psychological effect.Bouncing is u just get caught up sometimes in your ow n reality and she covered in mor e detail in the next chapter. Bu t what' s interesting doesn't always merit your full attention. Yo u turn away for a here is the shared frame. Yo u and the girl are no w in on second, which indicates disinterest, delivering a slight something together. Yo u have decided together to go on this emotional tinge directly to her. journey together an d no w her e you are together. Assuming yo u Whe n you are training a do g to, say, no t jump on you, yo u di d your A3 properly, she has already been falling into your hoops don' t hit his nose, because that shows anger and dogs often , and a "we are together" frame is no w strengthening between the cant correlate your anger wit h his behavior. (This is wh y calling two of you.This shared reality is know n as a conspiracy. Yo u a girl on he r shit while on the phon e sucks. It just makes he r no t can usually tell whe n people have a conspiracy together by the wan t to take calls from you in the future.)Instead you simply looks they give on e another, an d by their use of nicknames an d detach yourself from the equation by taking pennies, putting the inside jokes. It goes withou t saving that yo u can also use m in a jar an d whenever your do g jumps, yo u shake it briefly by these endearments to strengthen the conspiracy between you and his head. This scares him. However , this is no t enoug h of a solution because over time he will come to recognize that you are 2. Enlist a girl to directly help you doing it, an d he won' t only no t jum p on you he won' t wan t 3. Backwards merge to a previous set to go near you.So the solution do g trainers have is this: after 4. Forwards merge by openin g a ne w set an d bringing the ne w the correction for bad behavior, you structure a challenge for the girl back to the main target. do g to do something correctly. Fo r example, right after yo u If yo u wan t a 10, you need to do advanced group shake the jar, you then say, "sit" an d help the do g to sit. theory - whic h is the application of merging groups. Anecdota The n yo u reward hi m with love an d affection "gooo d boy! Yes l evidence from the field is, that of the sets wher e jealousy was goo d boy!"If you only punish, the do g sees you as the punisher. utilized, success always came mor e often an d with mor e of a But if yo u wan t hi m to obey you an d love yo u still, you mus t solid set. So make he r jealous as a regular part of your gam e an d reward hi m as well. So, in this way, whe n we IO D a girl, we mus you'll have girls wanting you.Demonstration s are always mor e t then structure an opportunity to have her jum p throug h one of effective than verbal insinuations. However, here are a couple our hoops . Whe n she does, you reward her with "respect," or, verbal tactics to install jealousy: "dam n that is witty. I give yo u that " or "ok yo u win" or "that was 1. On the phon e say, "Hold on I hav e another call." Do this A-crowd!" three or four times during the conversation an d act annoyed. Jealousy Plotlines It'll make you seem popular. Girls have don e this to me and it Jealous y is a powerful motivator. Fo r a girl, horniness is no t works. as powerful a motivator as jealousy. Which is better: a girl wh o 2. Yo u can also thro w in the tact that yo u have a girlfriend feels horn y bu t is in a club with her friends or a girl wh o isn't (which you may, or not.) "A girlfriend of min e ..." or ho w about, horn y bu t is super jealous? Always choose jealous y in the club "I don' t think my girlfriend would like it that you're flirting with because it is usually the momen t whe n she realizes just ho me. " Don' t worry abou t blowing yourself ou t because whe n the w attracted she is to you. Horn y has its place too , bu t not until yo girl says, "I thought you have a girlfriend," yo u say, "you want u get her alone at the sex location.So, while in Comfor t phase, me to be single don' t your So you can have me. Yo u like me!!! whe n yo u are no t hitting on her, just laughing an d spending Haa, I thought that woul d make you jealous."Incidentally, example time (after A3) imagine another girl comes and sits on your 2 is similar to the old gay bit where yo u convey to a girl that you lap. Yo u introduce the tw o and voila! Instant emotions! See, are gay in orde r to create a challenge. Later on whe n yo u are plotlines must be built int o your game consciously just like negs making ou t with he r an d she says, "I thought you wer e gay" are really building a plotline between you an d the target. Th e you can reply "I was. " principle is that people are willing to wor k mor e to preserve an DEFINITION : By the way, a bit is a length of thread. A piece of existing investmen t than they are to make a ne w investment, thread. A bit of thread. even if bot h carry the exact same risk an d reward. Simply Finally, here is an importan t not e for those wh o try this. put, fear of loss is a mor e powerful motivator than anticipation After you make her jealous, thoug h it ma y increase your value of gain.Th e momen t finally comes whe n yo u choose her and her attraction to you, she may no t respon d with visible IOIs . over the other girl. This willingness to flake off girls (which they In fact, she ma y be cold whe n yo u retur n to her. This is partly a do to guys all the time) is a DHV . An d for her, it is he r momen t congruence test, and part female pride. Th e challenge here is to of triumph ove r another woman , whic h she relishes. She has war m he r up again to you, but without supplicating (and thus invested, she has experienced fear of loss, and no w she has failing the congruence test). So ignore wha t appear to be IOD s the prize (you!) after this (in mos t cases), because here they are actually IOI s Anothe r way to us e this is, if you have already attracted a certain showing that she wa s hurt an d threatened. * girl bu t she isn't being motivated enough, just go int o th e next * Credit to Style for this insight. set and attract another one . Yo u may like the ne w one better an Style's Eliciting Values Routine d thus flake off the first one, or yo u may use her as a paw n to "Wha t is the experience you mos t enjoy doing?" (She'll say make th e first on e jealous. Yo u could even merge the two dancing or being with family or something) Alternate wording: "If sets.This may sound Machiavellian an d perhaps you have moral yo u ha d to pick on e experience that makes life wort h qualms abou t it. Just keep in min d that jealousy plots are living...what would it be? ""Wha t is the ideal scenario of yo u doing extremely effective. This is an accurate assessment of huma n that thing? Describe it. ""So picturing that right now, ho w do you social behavior. It will happe n all around, even involving you feel.. .What emotions?""So really then, while I was asking yo u sometimes completely at random. Girls will use it against you as this, yo u smiled... an d yeah it's kind of because I' m being a bit well. Yo u always have a free will there is nothin g forcing yo u to funny or weird or whatever... bu t also, it's because you could kind use jealousy plotlines in your game. But they exist of feel that emotion right now , while we were talking abou t it... Demonstratio n is the secret key to a woman , no t languaging. can you feel it., blah blah blah"So really then, even though your There's nothing better tha n a live dem o and proo f that there is favorite experience is dancing, your core value is fun and another girl, an d its no t just talk Which is mor e powerful, telling a excitement, an d the way yo u feel those emotions in your body... girl that girls like you, or actually having two girls on your arm? So what's mos t importan t to yo u is the experience of fun Telling a girl yo u are adventurous, or showing a picture of yo u roc an d excitement, and whatever leads yo u to that is mos t k climbing ?Demonstrations tha t creat e jealous y important... blah blah " 1. Have a female wing or pivot wh o is "in the know " with you, "Ok , so in four minutes we've fulfilled your quest for core value. 2. Build a paw n while in the club. Yo u can the now. " So for example, you are in isolation wit h your target, an d yo u I n other words: do a brief take away. Use a lock-in pro p on her (Mystery often 1. Favorite activity uses his hat) an d then go find a girl from a previous set. Tell her, 2. Description of her favorite activity in an ideal setting "I' m sitting over there with my friend, let me introduce you,"So 3. Wha t emotio n she gets while she pictures this whe n you com e back, you come bac k with a friend. Of 4. Show her that she experienced the emotio n while picturing it cours e this 'friend' then sits in your lap. A previous set has no w 5. Show her that what she really wants is no t so muc h the been merged with the ne w one, bu t instead of group-to-group, it's activity (although it's important) bu t the emotional fulfillment she isolation-to-isolation. Yo u have two different girls in C1 at the gets from it. same time.Fro m the poin t of view of the girl you brought over, 6. No w she ca n the happy introducing her to on e of your other 'friends' is respectful an d is Grounding a comfort tactic; the fact that this friend is a ho t girl helps wit h [From Mystery's Lounge Mystery's classic Grounding article.] social proof. She also feels goo d whe n yo u kino her in front of the I'm sure you've found yourself in a set when you reach the point othe r girl.Fro m your target's point of view the girl wh o is still where your target says, "What do you do?" You either give her your wearing your lock-in pro p she no w has a challenge on her honest but lame answer like, "I'm a student", or "I'm a system hand s and jealousy . Bam! Sometimes the momen t she first administrator", or worse, you try to circumvent the question feels jealousy is also whe n she first consciously realizes that she is entirely with "I'm an ass model." A cocky answer like this might be into you, an d that she wants to have yo u over the othe r girl. funny at first, but she will probably ask you again shortly. Do you If you don' t have ready pawns from previous sets, you can make have something to hide?The problem is you don't have an on e whe n yo u do your takeaway. So yo u ru n off an d enlist a attractive identity, or if you do, it's not a strong one. Some guys girl to directly hel p yo u by saying, "I like this girl. Will yo u make will experiment with "I'm a rock star," or "I'm a promoter," or "I'm he r jealous for me?" It's a tool.If yo u have a pivot, find he r and a public speaker," but your target will either feel you are lying (in tell he r to find you an d sit on your lap in two minutes. the same way we believe an"actress" is likely a "waitress"), or if Or just game another set quickly and the n whe n yo u isolate she does believe your evidence, she becomes intimidated - you th e girl from that group, say, "I've go t my friend over there , let get weighed down by the stereotype she has of you. For example, me introduce you."So there are several options: I am a magician. How can she relate to that? 1. Fin d you r pivot Instead of answering her question with "I'm a magician," I can sequence them (which routines you will use and when) , and ground my present identity to her reality and harness the convey to your target the way you handle challenges in your life. opportunity to convey a much richer personality. Here's how I So this is what you must now do to improve your game: do it: 1. Figure out who you are by looking at what you do repeatedly - I 1. "Well when I was little I wanted to be..." I something you can say in a word or two (e.g. magician, writer, toy (Childhood regression. Tell stories about my dreams and inventor, CEO, hacker, rock climber, rapper, public speaker, ambitions as a child.) traveler...) Are you really pursuing your dream? What would you do 2. "When I was a teenager..." (Tell stories about how I got from 1 with your life if you had no chance of failure? Start doing it. to 3.) 2. Come up with several stories that convey how you got from 3. "Now I'm a magician. Can you believe it?" (Talk about where I being a normal kid to doing what you repeatedly do. am now and what I'm working on next.) 3. Practice telling these stories to others to make the stories Here is the applied format that I used to ground my identity to a enthusiastic and natural. She should feel as though she's been on recent 9's reality. It helped to attract her and build enough comfort this journey with you. to get her back to my place. While grounding you can also ask her, "So what were you like as a 1. What do I do? Well, when I was young, teenager?" etc. This is a great way to open her up and get her a. ...I wanted to be a ventriloquist, and then a magician. (Talk invested in the interaction. Going for rapport in this way right at about this a bit.) the opener would be try-hard and telegraph interest. But now that 2. When I got a bit older... she has given you IOIs and she has earned your IOIs, a. Tell story of my first birthday party magic show and how the sparingly using questions in this way you can effectively build a money was used to see a Copperfield show. (5 minute story.) strong connection with her. b. Tell story of how my biggest audience scared the shit out of me Chapte r Seve n Revie w and how I went up and kicked ass. I really get into the fear of it all. The game is played in comfort. It's necessary to develop a (3 minute story.) wide conversational rapport, a sense of comfort and trust, a c. Talk about my first real TV experience. (2 minute story.) sense that the interaction is real and genuine, and a feeling of d. Tell her about moving to Las Vegas and why. This is a connection. "vulnerability routine" in comfort stage. (3 minute story.) Missing elements of A3 and comfort are the primary reason 3. Tell her what is now on my plate... that girls will flake out and blur when you call them the next a. My "WTF?" underground internet show, my TV reality show day. Most guys get all blurry numbers when they first start interest, the book I'm writing, and my seminars on various gaming. topics such as social dynamics and wealth building. (5 minutes of When you are real with her, it creates trust and allows her stories.) to feel safe. Don't front, sulk, or have a confrontational attitude. b. Tell her what I am planning on doing next illusion show Keep it fun and remember that whatever the issue, it's no big concepts, publicity stunts, etc.(5 minutes of stories.) deal. That was at least 23 minutes of story-telling and I was holding this A comfort building location is usually a more quiet and beautiful girl long before I performed any magic. The reason magic secluded setting where you, your romantic interest, and works for me of course is because I'm a magician. You do not need potentially a few friends can share in lengthier dialogue. to use my style or do magic in any way to use Mystery Method. The C1 location is a quiet spot somewhere within the There is no shortage of former students of mine who don't perform meeting location. The C2 location is a place to go on a bounce or magic yet still, by sticking to the method and running their unique time bridge. The C3 location is within the sex location. personality conveying material, they can consistently attract Practice moving her take your romantic interest from women.If I just come in and say "I!m a magician," my target really the meeting location to the C1 location. wouldn't feel that we share commonalities or lifestyle. She would It's important to be a talkative person and to constantly be have to rely on stereotyping. I would also not appear very humble. practicing your conversational skills. Don't get stuck on boring She would feel that I'm too different for her and I would otherwise or creepy topics keep it fun, interesting, and emotionally over- qualify myself. Some women it seems would actually reject compelling. (Add value.) a date with George Clooney because they don't understand his Be agreeable, don't ask a lot of questions, and remember; lifestyle - they feel they lack commonality and this lack creates don't seek attention, approval, or understanding from others. discomfort. But what if he gave her his back-story and taught her (Be unaffected.) what happened, step-by-step, to him to become who he is today? Talking is also a powerful logistical tool that keeps her This is the concept of grounding. conscious mind occupied and out of trouble while you progress the By giving my target my back-story, I ground myself to her reality courtship. You don't want her ant-slut defease rearing its ugly ("When I was as a regular Joe") so that she can see how she too head and screwing everything up. could be the type of person I now am ("This is who I am today") if Sharing commonalities builds comfort and rapport, and only she were to make similar decisions along the way. You can helps her to imagine spending time with you in the future. Beware: even later use this format to encourage your target to ground her if it comes off like you are fishing for commonalities with her, it is a life to you during A2 by having her stick to the format. Simply DLV. Serendipity must be preserved! ask, "Whoa. Back up. So what happened next?" A conspiracy is a shared frame between you and your Notice in my list of grounding stories above that the common romantic interest, characterized by inside jokes, nicknames , theme is "This is what led me to become who I am today." You too and a growing connection. It is the natural outgrowth of the A3 must do this - once you decide what your identity in fact is. Does process where validation was used to bait her into frame this mean you must steal my magician identity in order to do the submission. Mystery Method? No. You won't be telling stories of your first Vulnerability is attractive and builds comfort. Instead of birthday party magic show. That would be a lie. You won't talk trying to protect your ego, set it tree. Be willing to laugh at about how you learned the secret to a card trick by beating it out of yourself it shows confidence. a classmate of yours, or how years later that classmate saw you on The freeze-out is the deliberate use of IOD s to create TV and said, "I can't believe your future changed that day." No, you discomfort (as a way to train her out of bad behavior.) The won't use my specific material. Nor will any of my students. But freeze-out should come off sincere and inadvertent; she you can use material from your own real life experiences as I do. shouldn't perceive that you are trying to punish her, rather, just a The format or game plan is the Mystery Method. The personalized bit of disinterest triggered by her behavior, resulting in a temporary material you use to fill in the format is what constitutes your own, loss of attention or validation. personal style.Now, how does one answer the deep question, "Who After you ' punish ' her with the freeze-out, give her a am I?" A friend of mine told me, "You are what you repeatedly do." compliance test so that you can reward hex for passing it. I do magic on a regular basis. I perform it almost every day, Jealousy is a very powerful motivator. If she feels it, that's whether for a beautiful woman or any other person. Style writes often when she first realizes that she wants you. This also gives almost every day (and gets paid for it,making him a full-time her that much more drama when you do eventually choose her. professional) . What do you do on a regular basis? Besides being a When we relate our identity, sometimes it can create social butterfly that is. Remember, the pick-up arts exist to enrich distance instead of closeness. But the use of a groundin g routine your life, not define it. What stories do you already possess that allows her to follow your life through stories, leading up to where convey who you have become today? you are today. This helps her to relate to you and to Grounding reality is far reaching. It will change the way you do empathize as if she had been there with you. A2, A3, and build comfort - but will not alter their basic structure. It Figure out what you do repeatedly. Pursue your dreams. To will also change the way you choose and structure routines, ground her reality to your identity, tell her stones that convey how you got to where you are today and what's coming next. "I wan t to kiss you." Mid-Game and End-Game Le t the conversatio n drop . Whe n she re-initiates, interrup t Chapter 8 wit h"Shh..." *kiss * A. sense that "it is on " between us.. .logistical issues and the "Kiss me. " passage of time.. .intimacy and seduction "Yo u talk a lot . Woul d yo u like to kiss me? " The poin t of C2 is to make he r feel familiar with you. It's no t "D o yo u like havin g you r nec k bit? Why? Because righ t no abou t routines so muc h as shared space. Take her with you to w all I wan t to do is bite your neck. " the mail. Let her keep yo ucompany whil fou while you are workin "May I bite you r neck ? (If she says 'why' tha t mean s she g on a paper. It takes four t to ten hours of comfort building to want s yo u to . Onl y if she says ' no ' do yo u not bite her neck have sex with a girl. That' s seven hours of babysitting, on playfully.) average just wait it out. Whe n the time comes , get her isolated Mystery's Kiss Close an d escalate.Mid-game is an opportunity to practice being with a Yo u ask, "Woul d yo u like to kiss me ?If she says yes, kiss hex. girl an d kissing her, to practice naturally leading he r throug h I f she says, "Maybe, " ''Why?", "Wha t d o yo u mean " o r " I bounces an d bridges, an d practice talking on the phone . donno " i t mean sshe does , bu t is shy abou t it. Reply wit h a Remember, the game is played in comfort. glea m in you r eye, "Let's find out..."*kiss * Remembe r t o caress Th e Seven Hour Rule th e bac k o f he r nec k t o sho w yo u mea n business If she says If yo u lo g the minute s yo u spen d wit h a woman , you'll realize no , yo u reply, "Well I didn' t say yo u could, it just looke d like yo tha t it usually takes somewher e betwee n tou r an d te n hours , u ha d somethin g o n you r mind. " (Don' t ask " Wh y not? "Thi s cumulatively, t o g o fro m meetin g he r t o having sex wit h her . show s lo w self-esteem.) Th e average is aroun d seven hours .Mystery discovere d the I f she says, "no t yet" o r "no t here " i t mean s she i s ope n t o i Seven-Hour Rule while searching for pattern s relating his t bu t ther e i s a logistical issue. Perhap s he r friends are nearby, success stories. Anecdota l evidence an d field report s fro m o r she need s mor e gamin g first. Say, "I understand, " an d man y venusia n artists generally confir m the accuracy of the continu e gamin g her.Doe s it see m as if mos t of these lines rule, exceptin g instance s of fool's mate of course . involve asking he r for permissio n in orde r to kiss her ? Is While i t can tak e several day s o r eve n weeks t o tha t wimpy? The y are just considerations . We'v e foun d that accumulat e seven hour s o f time with a woman , i f yo u just going fo r th e kiss withou t indicating you r intention s ca n seduc e he r prematurely, yo u ru n th e high risk o f makin g sometime s lead to embarrassmen t mor e tha n he r saying he r uncomfortabl e enoug h to hav e he r attraction for yo u turn just saying no. Whe n she says no , that i s muc h easier t o off.W e hav e also discovere d that the mos t emotionally save face fro m tha n th e situation wher e yo u try t o kiss he r rewardin g lon g ter m relationships ofte n develop int o sexual an d she move s away. one s within a week; sometime s within as little as a fe w days. Tha t having bee n said, feel free to field-test every possibl e kiss Thi s only happen s whe n yo u accumulatively lo g an average mov e tha t yo u can thin k of. Just go right in for th e kiss o f fou r t o te n hour s o f comfor t building i n the presenc withou t saying a word . If she turn s he r head , us e you r e o f th e woma n before attemptin g t o seduc e her. han d to turn it bac k an d kiss he r anyway. Tes t it ou t a Mystery's mos t passionat e relationships (on e of whic h hundre d times.B e enthusiastically willing t o brainstor m an d lasted thre e an d a half years), ofte n becam e sexual within a experiment . few days of meetin g th e woman . The y also averaged aroun d 7 Evolution Phase Shift Routine by Style hour s i n accumulate d tim e before seductio n occurred . 1. I tell her that she smells good and ask what she is wearing. It is interesting to note that the Seven Hour Rule is also Then I lean in, brush her hair aside, and sniff her slowly, moving up intrinsically comforting even if you are not actively from the shoulder to the ear. "Mmmm, that smells good. People "comfort building" during that time, the mere fact that you are don't pay enough attention to smell. But you'll notice how sharing time together is a powerful component of the comfort animals, before they mate, will always smell each other. stage.Th e following tim e lo g is a typical exampl e of a moder n Evolution has hard-wired us to respond to certain things. You are day courtship : wired to respond when someone smells you." Day/Minutes/Stage/Location/Highlights 2. "It's like when someone pulls the back of your hair. You'll 1/1:30/Attract, Comfort/Pub/Kiss, exchange numbers notice how lions, when they mate, always bite and tug at the end 3/0:05/Comfort/Phone/Invite for hot apple cider of each other's mane, right here." (Since I'm shaved bald, I'll add 4/0:10/Comfort/His Place/Brief house visit then leave here, "This is what I miss the most about not having hair"; if you 4/1:15/Comfort/Caf/Talk an d hold hands have hair, say, "This is one of my favorite things".) Then I run my 4/0:45/Comfort/His Place/Video, kiss, mall invite hand up the back of her neck and grab a fistful of hair at the roots 7/0:15/Comfort/Her Car/Picked up to go to mall and pull it, downwards. She says "Mmmm..." And I say "see." 7/3:00/Comfort/Mall/Meet at mall, share straw 3. Then I talk about how "No one knows this, but the most 7/0:25/Seduce/His Place/Bath and sex sensitive places on the body are places that are usually hidden Tota l 7 hour s an d 25 minute s hav e accumulate d in 7 days. from contact with the air, like the back of the elbow (touching it) Mos t o f th e tim e yo u share wit h a woma n shoul d b e and knee (touching it). Any place where your body bends, twists, investe d i n comfor t building (mid-game) so that she will or folds, there are millions of sensitive little nerve endings that be comfortabl e whe n yo u begin seduction. release endorphins. Then I take her arm, bend it a little, and Kissing erotically bite the area on the opposite side of the elbow (that Kin o an d kissing are comfort builders, no t seduction. crease where it bends). She usually gets the chills, and I have her If yo u go too far (into seduction) before you have enoug ratify how good it feels.[Note for the less experienced: If you don't h comfort, you'll feel like a great player at th e time bu t you won' know how to erotically bite a girl, learn before you do this. You t ge t laid whe n(a) your fool's mat e backfires an d (b) you want to take a big chunk of skin -- not a little pinch! - and slowly get buyer's remorse the next day. and firmly slide your teeth together until they meet and release the Ho w will yo u kno w the right momen t t o kiss? Yo u skin. You may want to practice on your own elbow first.] mus t train you r intuitio n throug h tim e in th e field. A goo d 4. After, I say, "But do you know what the best thing in the rule of thum b is t o kiss he r after she has given yo u thre e world is?...A bite...right..here." And I point to the side of my neck. IOIs . Fo r example , she touche s you , she laughs a t you r (Every now and then, I'll add, that "this has to do with the fact that jokes, an d she picks u p th e conversatio n whe n yo u let it it is where the jugular vein is most exposed, and since most sexual drop . Go for it, just for th e practice. fantasies have to do with submission and vulnerability, it sends all T o d o this, whe n yo u are ready, just g o for a the fantasy signals flying.") Then I'll expose my neck and say, "Bite make-ou t i n every set. Tak e a mont h o r tw o t o focus o me right here" as if I expect her to do it. Fifty percent of the time n it. D o i t a t different times over dozen s i n sets i n orde r she will. If she doesn't, I just turn away calmly (punish), wait a few t o calibrate. Righ t now , can yo u consistently get make-out seconds, and then turn back and repeat, "Bite me right here." s while you'r e in th e field? Usually she will. Withi n twent y minute s of meetin g her, yo u shoul d be 5. Half the time, her bite is lame. If so, I correct her and say, able to kiss he r an d isolate he r for comfor t building. Note , "That's not how you bite. Come here." Then I give her a good bite this doesn' t mea n that, long-term , yo u shoul d kiss every on the neck and instruct her to"try again." This time, she ALWAYS girl in every set. Bu t yo u should hav e the ability to do so does a great job. consistently, thu s it is goo d practice for a beginner . 6. Now you look her in the eye, smile mischievously/approvingly, Emotions ! Contro l an d direct th e girl's emotions . W e and say, very slowly, "not bad." Then glance down at her are usually far to o intellectual! Just tell th e girl to "shhh" an d mouth, back up at her eyes, and...yes...finally...you...may...if nuzzl e her. Pu t you r mout h t o he r ear an d inhale an d you want...and if she's ready...um...kiss! whispe r ho w goo d she smells. Short Version: grab hair, bite my neck, kiss elbow, rub back sometime, " and then, whe n she agrees, yo u po p ou t the of knee, triangular gazing. notepa d an d the pe n as if she ha d requested it, saying, Th e C 2 Location "Give m e you r number. " Any comfort building location separate from the If your frame is congruent, she will behave as if it was her idea meeting location and the sex locationWhe n yo u are i n an d comply. It all depends on the energy between the two of you. C1 , the presenc e o f you r romanti c interest's friends o r family Is it 'on'?When things are on they just seem to flow so ma y a t times compromis e your comfor t building efforts. Yo naturally. Instead of looking for clever ways to ask for her u ma y instead simply no t hav e th e tim e t o sit wit h her . number , focus on creating that chemistry that can grow between Fo r whateve r reason , whe n yo u are unabl e t o continu e tw o people.Th e purpos e of the time bridge is simple: to bridge building comfor t i n C1 , yo u will hav e t o jum p from C 1 t o C2 the gap of tim e that keeps yo u apart. Yo u are wit h her now an d Example s o f C 2 locations: the time bridge will allow yo u to be with her again in person so Sitting in bar, coffee shop, quiet restaurant or living room that you may continue. Remember , the courtship goes from Window shopping (mall or street) meet to sex, no t from mee t to phon e number. Merely As you walk or drive from one comfort building location to getting a numbe r is not a bridge, because a bridge mus t have another two sides. A numbe r doesn't have a definite other side. Whe n Before yo u approac h a woma n in a meetin g location, hav e yo u call, you'r e stuck trying to set a date to see each othe r again you r C2 comfor t building locatio n pre-selected. Ever y if only yo u did that in the first place, you wouldn't even need successful pick-up will inevitably jum p t o C2 . Yo u ma y jum the r number . p from on e C 2 location t o anothe r a s man y times a s A time bridge leads to a definite time an d place where you will be necessary until yo u spen d enoug h tim e an d build with he r in perso n to continue the courtship. It is something that enoug h comfor t t o successfully shift to C3 . you have painted ont o her imagination an d perhaps yo u eve n Jumping ran a routine abou t it. Whereas merely getting a numbe r is Goin g from on e comfor t location to anothe r is called nothin g mor e tha n a stairway to heaven. It doesn't take muc h jumping. Ther e are tw o ways to jump: the bounce an d th practice before you start getting phon e number s and realize they e time-bridge. To bounc e mean s to mov e you r grou p o are all blurring. Making those number s mor e solid is a serious f peopl e t o a different venu e tha t sam e night. Wherea s concern.Tr y setting a time and place to meet up again. Yo u time-bridging i s t o mak e plans t o see he r a t anothe r should be prepared with two or three time bridges for situations time . (Obviously bouncin g is preferable.) whe n yo u can't bounce. Th e Bounce Som e examples : On e wa y to chang e comfor t building locations is to do so at that 1. "I'm picking up some shoes at the mall tomorrow . Com e keep time. Thi s instan t venu e change is called bouncing. (As whe n me compan y and we can window* shop." a friend says to you , 'We'r e leaving for Mel's Diner . Let' s 2. "I've got to dro p off some stuff to my sisters. Com e keep bounce." )I n othe r words , th e purpos e o f bouncin g i s t o me company for the drive. I'll pick yo u up at eight PM. " successfully get yo u from on e comfor t building location t o 3. "I have a dinner party in two weeks. Yo u have to come!" the next, s o that yo u ma y continu e spendin g time wit h 4. "I'm going to the Magic Castle in Hollywood on Thursday to you r romanti c interest that same night. Often , these ar e see a magic show. I'd like you to come . Let's exchange numbers. " in fact structure d opportunitie s for th e woma n t o pursu e you Notice ho w yo u already have a reason to see each othe r in- !Examples : person again. If yo u just go t the number , yo u could be in a Mystery turn s to th e woma n he has bee n sitting wit h in C1 position wher e you have to try to convince he r to see yo u again. for a tim e an d says, "My friends an d I are abou t to gra b Yo u don' t even nee d to exchange numbers. Exchanging a bite to eat ove r at Mel's Diner . Yo u an d you r friends are number s conforms to o muc h to the stereotypical dating frame. mor e tha n welcom e t o tag along." If she won' t meet yo u again, then the proble m was with your no Daytime: t building enough value and comfort in the first place an d the "I' m starved; I've go t to grab a bagel. Com e join me." numbe r wouldn' t have changed that.Having solid game is "I nee d to get an envelope from the post office, com e more important than getting phone numbers. Solid keep me company." game makes for solid numbers. "I'm going dow n to Melrose to grab a shirt I nee d to get, In the third example, you may get the number. (You've go t let's go get some lunch. " two weeks to pu t together a dinner party!) Call her the next day Nighttime : an d use the phon e to establish greater rapport. Time on the "We're on the guest list for a better club. Com e with phon e counts toward the 7 hours it's just another way of us." becoming a norma l part of her life.If yo u have enoug h comfort "I' m starved. Let's get some food." with her, yo u can mee t he r somewhere without even "We're going next doo r to sit dow n for a bit. Would yo exchanging number s an d she will be there. Bu t if you don' t have u an d your friends like to join us? " enoug h comfort, the numbe r will blur, which means it wa s It' s interesting to not e that, for whateve r reason , bouncin g (as worthless anyway. So don' t place to o muc h importance on well as moving) is no t only a necessar y escalator, bu t also is a getting number s practice solid game. powerful comfor t builder in-and-of- ltself. It just creates tha t ibe. Choose locations that are conveniently near your hous e or wher e If you are successfully bouncin g an d th e seven hour s are yo u plan on being anyways. Don' t go ou t of your way to mee t a passing, comfor t nearly takes care o f itself. Thes e are the girl wh o ma y flake on you. Have a life. Th e mor e compelling tw o mos t importan t aspects o f comfort - building.The best your life is, the mor e she will want to be a par t of it.Don' t go to way to calibrate your bouncing is to just do it as much as possible. 'coffee' instead say "I have to meet my friend Dian e at the Eventually your intuition will tell you when it is the right time. coffee pu b to dro p off a page layout for an undergroun d Th e Tim e Bridge newsletter. Meet me there." Th e second way to jump comfort locations is to agree to see I went to a mall yesterday and sat beside an old man in the each other at a later date. This is called time-bridging.Th e crowded food court with my "Made in Japan" meal. He started to so-called "number close" (as in, "I go t he r phon e number" ) isn't talk to me about this and tha t ho w skateboards used to be just even a close at all. Ther e is only on e type of close, really: sex. metal wheels on woo d boards and no w they are fiberglass and Are yo u a closer?Incidentally, there is no such thing as a such. Well, I just wanted to eat my food. I nodded but didn't "kiss close" either, since kissing is just a comfort-building tactic. want to invest in the conversation (nothing personal, he was a Just like pulling th e back of her hair is no t a hair pulling close, or nice enough ma n and all, just... no t my type haaa.) biting he r neck is no t a neck biting close. They are merely comfort I was displaying to him IOD s (indicators of disinterest.) I didn't building tactics.So what is a time bridge? want to say, "Please don't talk to me" as that would have been A time bridge is an optional move in your game that you play only rude and confrontational. Well, many women will find themselves if yo u cannot follow the standard gam e plan of bouncing he r for in the same position. There are several IOD s and I conveyed food an d eventually sex. After all, if yo u bot h have the time an a couple of them to this old man. I averted my eyes to him, I d interest, isn't it better to continue now rather than try to opened a magazine and flipped through it while he was talking, I continue it at another time?But perhaps she won' t bounce. Maybe got really into my food and I answered his questions with one logistics are screwed up , he r friends are there, or you just liner answers.No w I'm no t saying that you should give up on a girl haven't ha d the opportunity to build enoug h comfort for her to when she gives you some IODs , because you can always torn it accept such an escalation. The n what ? Well, yo u try to build as around. The old man could have talked about something that muc h comfort an d trust as yo u can, and then you build a time fascinated me and I maybe would have shared a conversation bridge,While talking, say, "I t woul d b e coo l t o tal k agai n with him (a good reminder of ho w important it is to initiate an inherently interesting conversation), but imagine if after this conversation with the old man, he tried to get my number. Think This is the most important piece. When you are holding that one ho w weird that would be. phone number and worried that you are going to fuck it up, that's I mean, I've gotten numbers from guys before. That's ho w we going about it all wrong. You should be out gaming regularly. make male friends and buds. But imagine if this old man wanted to Eventually you will be getting phone numbers regularly and you will 'hang out.' I be like, "um, no thanks." He's not offering any value, be going through your calling rotation regularly as well. It's hard to and I feel no connection to him. Asking for my number under those be worried about any specific number when you know that you still circumstances would be an attempt to force a familiarity have 5 others to call. It's all just practice - and the lack of between us, which is Creepy, while simultaneously begging for neediness will be evident in your voice. rapport with me, which is try-hard Both are severe DLVs. A Note on Flakes See. this is what a lot of guys put women through. A brief thirty There will always be some percentage of flakes. Girls tend to be seconds If boring talk and then they hit on the girl by asking for he flakey creatures. They don't just flake on you - they flake on their r number. Ho t wome n are ultra-sensitive to this they've been friends and family, and often they even flake on themselves. Just through it a slew of times. So when you do attempt to construct a keep calling them anyway. Put them in the rotation. There is a time bridge, make it natural. Have a reason to see each other again random component to the game. Sometimes a girl who really liked and play solid game.Don't be the old ma n in this story. you won't return your calls. Sometimes a girl that wasn't so solid is Phone Gam e suddenly ready to come over and get it on. You never know! So [From Mystery's Lounge Lovedrop's original article on phone just keep them in the rotation and keep practicing. Never take any game.]As you go into the Field and practice your game, you will number seriously. start to accumulate phone numbers. At some point the venusian As your game improves, your flake percentages will drop. So artist asks himself, "What do I do with these numbers? How do I keep working on value, attract, qualify, comfort, etc. Keep working convert these into lays?" on conditioning girls to chase after you and get invested in the Oftentimes it happens like this: the venusian artist has been in the interaction. The tighter your game, the fewer flakes you will have field for some weeks or months and finally he gets a number that to deal with. has some importance to him. Perhaps the set went really well or J* Often you can't even get the girl on the phone. Big deal. the girl is especially hot, or he hasn't been laid in a while. For Maybe it's buyer's remorse. Maybe her friends talked her out of whatever reason, he wants to play it just right so that he gets this it. Maybe her grandma just died. Leave her a message and call the girl. He might even post in an online forum or call a friend with next girl. Go out practicing tonight. Etc! This is a lifestyle. game so he can ask, "What do I do with this number? How do I get Dating this girl?" He doesn't want to fuck this up!!And there's the [From Mystery' s Loung e Lovedrop' s origina l article on dating. rub. You cannot ever let some number become that important to ]At some point in my game, I discovered that it was really easy to you - much in the same way that you cannot ever let any specific get isolated with a girl. I could game up a set, get a number, call courtship matter to you. Opening sets and calling numbers are both her a few days later, and soon she's sitting on my bed and we're activities that you should be doing over and over again purely for watching a movie together.But the problem was, 1 hadn't done the practice.If I am going into my sixth set of the night, and I know enough A3 or comfort in order to escalate. There was this weird there will be more sets tonight {and tomorrow night, etc) I am just pressure for me to make a move, even though she wasn't ready for not going to be that concerned about the outcome. Instead, I can me to do so, and it would be awkward - and then I'd never hear focus on the process and play with it. I can practice my skill from her again. I discovered that I could get girls over at my place while simultaneously giving off a natural, comfortable vibe with the but I couldn't make anything happen after that point.The solution, subtext: J don't care if I fuck this up. Ironically this results for me, was to design a specific date plan that I could repeat over in a greater success rate.The same must be true of your phone and over again. A routine that I could practice with on many calls and your dates {time bridges.) You have to do many of them, different girls until I had my dating game tight. If you are getting or your skill will never improve. You can't take any one call or date numbers, but not lays, it's useful to practice your dating game in a seriously. You're just doing it for the practice. Enjoy the process. 3e structured way. willing to lose and learn.Here are just a few ideas to play around When designing my date, I decided it should have as many venue with on the phone: changes, and as many hours together, as possible. For some Anyone who's taken a live program knows that you shouldn't reason, moving, bouncing, and the seven hours are powerful eject from a set immediately after getting the phone number. Stay comfort builders, so I built these ideas into my date routine. Here's around and talk for a few more minutes afterwards. Otherwise you what I came up with:(On the phone) -- "Let's do sushi Wednesday play into the pattern of all the other guys she flaked on who got her night like we talked about. There's a good place near where I live. number immediately before parting. Come by around 7 and we'll go eat."~ 7:30 PM Girl shows up at Don't make the number itself the point. The point is the time my place. I come downstairs but then I "forgot" something so we bridge. Maybe the two of you discussed going to sushi. Maybe have to run back upstairs "real quick." She gets to see my pimp some art exhibit. Whatever. The point is that the number is an pad and my bay view, which she Oos and Ahhs over. Then I hustle incidental, not a goal. When in set, practice your bridging and her out and we drive to the sushi shop. Kudos to David DeAngelo of collection numbers along the way. Double Your Dating for this trick...it familiarizes her with your Don't assume that every phone call must occur for the purpose place (so it's not a big deal / fear of the unknown when you of setting up a meet. Is this how you use the phone when you talk return!) and it also makes her more curious about being in my to your friends? apartment, since I hustled her out. Call her up soon after the set is over (that same night) and chat ~8:00 PM We're at the Sushi shop. I have various routines that I for a few minutes, then let her go. always do...can't pour your own Sake, Japanese voice stuff, teach Call her in the next day or two and chat her up, then let her go. her chopsticks, etc. The specifics aren't important. Most of the In this way you come off non-needy, and you are time here is vibing, practicing comfort, the question game, palm conditioning her to accept you as a normal part of her life. Not read, whatever. Getting to know each other. some bar guy, not some club fantasy last Saturday - but a real ~9:00 PM "There's this really cool band playing across the street, person who is a normal and regular part of her life. let's go check it out!!" There is an 80's parody rock band that plays Call her when you're somewhere fun, like you would call your every Wednesday right across the street from my sushi shop. I guy friends, just to invite her over to hang out. Whether she comes have a VIP card to the venue so we don't have to wait in line. I or not, you're having a good time without her and she knows it. take the girl across the street but the band hasn't started yet. So Time on the phone counts towards comfort time (the seven we have a few drinks and more comfort building material, along hours.) So use it as an opportunity to build comfort, become a with some push/pull to keep up the sexual tension. pleasantly chatty person, and practice. Only time on the phone will -10:00 PM The concert room opens and we enter (another venue give you the practice so that you can vibe on the phone. change.) As the crowd thickens, I'm either leading her through the If you talk to her as described above, she will likely start hinting crowd or I've got my arms around her to protect her from the at a meet. Especially if you talk about the fun activities and friends crowd. The band goes on shortly after and she spends the next two that you experience in your day-to-day life. It's also perfectly hours either laughing at their comedic dialogues, or singing along reasonable to throw out an activity and see if she bites. If she with old favorite rock songs. doesn't, no big deal - your life is fun and fulfilling with or without ~Midnight -- We drive back to my place. I say, "Ok you can come her. You'll just get someone else. (This attitude, by the way, should upstairs but only for a few minutes, I have to work tomorrow." be subtext to her, never explicitly communicated.) [Credit: David D.] Even if a girl hasn't accepted an offer to meet (or preferably ~12:30 AM - We're sitting on my balcony making out. I take her by made one of her own) - it's no big deal to you because as soon the hand, say, "Let's go make out like a couple of teenagers," and as you get off the phone with her, you've still got to call five, ten, lead her back into my bedroom and fuck her. Notice how this or twenty other girls and practice the same phone game with them. routine allows me to get in lots of venue changes, pass time with the girl, and also practice other bits of my game...When I need to n som e music , lights u p th e hooka h an d the y share smokin g attract, I can be cocky and playful and use hot/cold dynamics. I can it. He inhales th e smok e fro m th e pipe, an d the n exhales i t keep screening and qualifying her, and I can work on comfort int o he r mouth . The y d o this several times.Sharing intimac y b y building and kino escalation. This all occurs within a date structure holdin g each othe r an d kissing, h e no w progresse s their that I can repeat every week with a new girl and practice until kissing int o foreplay. Bot h aroused, h e takes he r b y the it is tight.And tight it is - this routine gets me laid. hand , leads he r int o his bedroom , hand s he r a bo x o f Here's another date routine that I came up with recently for matche s an d says, "Here . Ligh t the candles while I find th e Saturday afternoons: incense. " He the n says, "Ca n yo u close the blinds for me? I' m -10:30 AM "It's such a beautiful day. I'm going to get lunch at going to wash up. " A minut e later h e returns . "Wh y don' the beach near where I live. Come over and we'll go together." t yo u g o was h u p while I light th e incense, " h e say s t o her ~12:00 PM --- Let her briefly upstairs and then hustle her out. , pointin g ou t wher e th e bathroom is. Drive to the main drag and park. Building the seductio n scene togethe r in this wa y is similar to ~12:15 PM There is a billiards place that serves food. We hang the wa y lon g ter m couples regularly do . Such out here for an hour or two, eat lunch and shoot some pool. ritualistic behavio r is familiar an d comfortable.I n case i t Meanwhile continue gaming., comfort building, etc. has no t bee n mad e clear u p until this point , d o no t make this ~ 2:00 PM ---Bounce and walk up and down the street. Go into mov e before yo u hav e properl y qualified he r an d built comfor clothes shops and try stuff on. There's one shop in particular with t wit h her. I f yo u do , it will activate he r anti-slut defense or cool masks, wigs, etc. Go into a vintage shop and try stuff on. cause he r to ge t buyer's remorse, or both .Furthe r ~4:00 PM -- After a few hours of bouncing around together, we go complicatin g matters , i f the windo w o f opportunit y i s ope n back to my car. an d yo u miss it, it seldo m open s twice for th e sam e bird. ~ 4:15 PM -- Swing by the store on the way home "to pick up some She ma y go hom e an d backwards rationalize all the reason s stuff." Get BBQ fixings. Walking around in the store together is a wh y it didn' t happen . So , in the interests o f practice an d great way to subconsciously activate domestic couple fantasies in rapid improvement , whe n i n doubt , just escalate. Eve n i f her lizard brain. She also gets involved in picking food out - which you'r e wrong , it will still improv e your calibration. makes her involved in the BBQ at my place. S2 : Last-Minut e Resistanc e ~5:00 PM -- Get back to my place. Make a few drinks and fire up Last-minute resistance is a horrible, uncontrollable fear the BBQ. Watch the sunset together. Make out, etc. built right into the circuitry of mos t women , an d it is your job Notice that all the venue changes seem perfectly spontaneous to to ease her throug h it. Having sex is a muc h larger risk an d her, even though they've all been planned out. So her experience investment for a woma n than it is for a man , and LMR is her last is fun, constantly changing, and without pressure. You are leading ring of defense before the Poin t of No Return.LMR threshold through all of this, and practicing your date game along the way. differs from girl to girl, an d even for a specific girl her LM R Design a date plan {or several) that you can execute over and threshold will change depending on the circumstances and the over again. value of the ma n she is sleeping with. Her e are some commo n Build the most useful logistics into the date. Design in the seven trigger points: hours. Design in the venue changes. Design it so she ends up at Kissing your place. Touchin g breasts Do it over and over again with many girls.++ Focus on improving To p removal your skill and improving your dating routine. Don't take it too Bra removal seriously. Pants removal The C3 Location Panties removal Any comfort building location within the sex Fingering locution.No t until yo u hav e buil t enoug h comfor t with a woma Ora l sex (giving or receiving) n can yo u jum p t o C3 . Example s o f C 3 locations: Overcoming LMR Sitting on couch in your living room 1."You've hijacke d my brain..." In whirlpool a short distance from your bedroom or hotel room 2.We should stop..." Sitting on couch in lobby near your hotel room 3.Play solid game in the first place Since every successful courtship will inevitably lead to the C3 4.Persistence location (which is in the sex location), before you even approac h a 5.Freeze-outs woma n in a meeting location, take efforts to secure a C3 comfort 6.Just go to sleep building location++ Don't be a pervert.. "You've hijacke d m y brain... " Th e Sex Location Often it is the case that your romantic interest doesn't feel qualified Mos t meetin g locations an d man y comfor t building enoug h she believes if she gives it up to o easily, yo u will location s are no t appropriat e settings for sexual simply mov e on afterwards. This is wh y it's so importan t in A3 for intimacy. In orde r to share in mutua l seduction, yo u will he r to feel that her efforts are succeeding an d that she is winning hav e to jum p to a sex location.A sex location is marke d yo u over. If this element is missing, notice that girls will freak ou primarily by its privacy an d shoul d be in close proximity to t just poo r to sex, saying tilings like, "Wh y me? Wh y do you like a C3 comfor t building location. Tha t wa y yo u onl y hav e a me? " and "I don' t even kno w you... "If you're lacking in this key shor t distance t o mov e whe n the time comes . Fo r example, element and need to compensate quickly in a logistical bind, use you r bedroo m i s very near your living room .Th e best seductio "Baby I just can't stop thinking about you" languaging to inoculate n location i s on e i n whic h yo u hav e complet e control , suc h against he r LAIR before you escalate. a s the bedroo m o f you r ow n apartmen t o r house . Fe w 'We should stop..." variables, such a s phon e calls, roo m mates, parent s an d pet s Th e primary technique in the LM R arsenal is token resistance, will imped e you r success.Conside r the various benefits an d usually verbal in nature while simultaneously continuing to limitations of the following sex location examples: escalate physically. "Baby, we should slow this down... " Wha t is A vehicle the purpos e of this? Wha t fantasy does it fulfill for her?Th e ideal A hote l roo m scenario involves a brave, intelligent heroine engaged in witty A friend's living roo m or bedroo m repartee with a cruelly taunting protagonist (with a heart of Th e woman' s bedroo m gold.) Sexual tension is building between them . At some poin t You r bedroo m they will lose all control an d ravenously consummat e their Som e C3 comfor t building locations suc h as a private living roo flirtation. It's not her fault. She was overtaken by forces m ma y also be a goo d sex location . If you are in suc h a entirely beyond he r control. Forces of Nature .Toke n resistance is location, yo u can save yourself from having t o mov e from C 3 t necessary to make that feeling real. If you don't resist, she will. o th e sex location .Before you assum e a public toilet nea r an Notic e that if she gives token resistance, the best response is to attract location is an excellent place to hav e sex, conside r this: just agree with her and even voice it yourself. If yo u disagree, yo if you r girlfriend of several years won' t hav e sex wit h yo u in u are only giving her something to pus h against. Don' t give he r a publi c bathroom , don' t expec t a quality woma n yo u just me traction by way of disagreement. t to . Thi s is only a rar e fool's mate .If yo u hav e no r yet Play Solid Game in the First Place secured a sex location , take efforts to do so before you He r emotional circuitry is designed to select for a high-value approac h a woma n i n a meetin g location. D o no t leave ma n who m she trusts and is pair-bonded to her. If your th e success o f you r end-gam e t o chance . game is tight, LMR will be greatly reduced as an issue. So Moving from C3 to S1 examine your basic game: Mystery sits in his living roo m wit h a woman, showin g he r 1. Are you a healthy, ambitious, socially comfortable person? som e shor t comedi c hom e movies . The y are i n C3.He put s o 2. Do yo u convey a lack of neediness at all times? 3. Have you otherwise demonstrated value, via pre-selection, doesn't work out.A time bridge is an agreement to see each leader-of-men switch (social intelligence an d social proof), other at a later date. This is an optional move in your game that emotional stimulation, frame control, etc? you play only if you cannot follow the standard game plan of 4. Has she chased, and otherwise invested in the interaction? bouncing her for food and eventually sex.Having solid game is 5. Hav e you been compliance testing? Do you have kin more important than getting numbers. Solid game makes for o escalation an d compliance? solid numbers.It's important to be practicing your game and getting 6. Doe s she feel that she has earned your interest? (Have yo u lots of phone numbers. When you have five or ten numbers to call, demonstrate d your "growing pairbond " for her, using qualifiers you are much less likely to worry about Jacking it up. No single and other IOIs?) number ever becomes that important to you, which is exactly 7. Have you built comfort and trust, an d a sense of the right attitude.After you get her phone number, stay and talk for connection, over seven hours and several venue changes? Do you a few more minutes.Get in the habit of going through your have jealousy? numbers and calling them up just to chat or invite girls to Nearly always, if on e is self-critical, it's possible to trace bac k whatever run activity you are currently doing. to on e of these points and determine wha t is causing th e LMR. Many girls will flake when you call them. It's no big deal. Just keep Persistence working on your game and keep up on your calling rotation. If you reach he r LMR threshold, do a slight tactical The game is a combination of skill (which requires practice) and retreat and then continue. Fo r example, stop trying to remov e luck (which requires random chance.) Both are greatly her shirt; just make-ou t with her for a bit longer, then try the increased by playing the numbers.If you are getting numbers, but shirt again. Often the issue is just that she needs mor e arousal- not sex, it's useful to practice dating in a structured way. Practice becomin g attuned to a woman' s feedback during foreplay. Design a date plan that you can repeat over and over again for the Freeze-Out s practice.Build the most useful logistics into the date. Design in If the LM R seems insurmountable, just do a freeze-out: turn on the seven hours. Design in the venue changes. Design it so she the light, snuff ou t the candle, check your email, go to the ends up at your place.The C3 location is a comfort building kitchen to make a sandwich, or pull ou t a checkers boar d and location within the sex location, such as your living room or Jacuzzi. challenge he r to a game. Th e powe r of this is in its sincere A sex location is marked primarily by its privacy and should be in delivery. If yo u were sulking, tha t would show that you wer e close proximity to a C3 location. Usually this is your bedroom.Once affected. Bu t you're unaffected. Just switch off the arousal you go from C3 into S1 (foreplay), you have crossed the point of circuitry like it's no big deal an d freeze her ou t sexually, then no return. She will get buyer's remorse if you do this too try again in ten minutes. Freeze-out s are deadly. soon, before enough comfort has been built.Last-minute Just go to Sleep resistance is a fear that women experience just poor to If all else fails, just go to sleep with her. A few hours later, the having sex, similar to the way that men experience approach two of you will awaken an d hav e sex.# anxiety. It is your responsibility to ease her through this. S3 : Sex Often LMR is greatly increased as a result of weaknesses in # Credit to Sinn, who discovered and field-tested this tactic. your game. By improving your game, you also reduce LMR as an Waypoints issue.Other techniques for combating LMR are token resistance, Whenever the venusian artist open s a set an d begins the freeze-outs, and persistence. Waypoints are points in the game , he is likely to encounter the sam e waypoints on his game, such as opening or isolating, that must always be present journey from meeting to sex.Some waypoints are: in any set that leads to sex.Sticking points are parts of your Openin g the set game that are currently causing you trouble. All venusian artists Hoo k Poin t (Flurry of IOIs ) have sticking points. Locking-in "So ho w do you all kno w each other? " (optional) Introductio n of playful kino "Woul d you like to join us? "(optional) She qualities herself or otherwise chases you. Isolate the target for comfort-building Compliance threshold Kissing Tim e bridge "Your friend and I like each other, are yo u cool with that?" (optional) Bounce to a C2 location Bounce to a seduction location Overcomin g LM R Th e waypoint s ar e importan t becaus e the y mus t all occu r a t som e poin t i n ever y set . I f you r gam e isn' t wher e yo u wan t i t t o be , figure ou t whic hwaypoin t is giving yo u th e mos t troubl e an d the n focus your practic e efforts in that area. Sticking Points Ever y venusian artist has sticking points, which are parts of his game that are currently causing hi m trouble. Eve n the best venusian artists hav e sticking points and will be eager to discuss the m in orde r to discover ne w ideas for overcoming them. In fact, if someon e is ever reluctant to discuss his sticking points, then likely the perso n is no t a venusian artist at all, bu t a keyboard jockey.Whenever your game reaches a ne w level, you will be confronted with ne w challenges and ne w sticking points. Thi s process is never ending the frustration often only increases with skill, and man y will no t have the patience to practice the venusian arts to mastery. To those wh o do , go the spoils. Chapter Eight Review It usually takes four to ten hours of comfort building before a woman is ready to have sex. This is known as the Seven Hour Rule. Kissing is a comfort builder. Through practice it is possible to isolate and kiss girls consistently within twenty minutes of opening the se t The C2 location is any comfort building location that is separate from the meeting location and the sex location. Moving from one comfort location to another is called jumping. There are two ways to jump: the bounce and the time bridge. Bouncing is the act of leaving one venue and going to another one at that time.If you bounce, get her number first. That way you won't appear to be settling for the number later if the bounce