6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

https://nyti.ms/2t4MI8u

TheOpinionPages

ElCapitan,MyElCapitan
DanielDuane

SPORTING JUNE9,2017

AlexHonnoldwokeupinhisDodgevanlastSaturdaymorning,droveintoYosemite
Valleyaheadofthesouldestroyingtrafficandwalkeduptothesheer,smoothand
stupendouslymassive3,000footgoldenescarpmentknownasElCapitan,themost
importantcliffonearthforrockclimbers.Honnoldthenlaceduphisclimbingshoes,
dustedhismeatyfingerswithchalkand,overthenextfourhours,didsomething
nobodyhadeverdone.HeclimbedElCapitanwithoutropes,alone.

Theworldsfinestclimbershavelongmusedaboutthepossibilityofaropeless
freesoloascentofElCapitaninmuchthesamespiritthatsciencefictionbuffs
museaboutfasterthanlightspeedtravelasadaydreamsafelybeyondhuman
possibility.TommyCaldwell,arguablythegreatestallaroundrockclimberalive,
toldmethattheconversationonlydriftedintohalfseriousnessonceHonnoldcame
along,andthatHonnoldssuccessfulclimbwaseasilythemostsignificanteventin
thesportinallofCaldwells38years.Ibelievethatitshouldalsobecelebratedas
oneofthegreatathleticfeatsofanykind,ever.

Likeallmatureathleticendeavors,climbinghassubdisciplinesthatcallfor
differentgeneticgiftsandveneratedifferentaccomplishments.Alpineclimbing
demandsperversecardiovascularendurancecoupledtoalustforsuffering,whileits
devoteeshavetroublegettinglatheredupoveranythingthatdoesntinvolvea
deliciousriskofdeathbyavalancheorfreezing.Indoorgymclimbingrewardsone
fingerpullupsfiredbyadeeplyspiritualconnectiontotexturedpolyurethane,plus

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 1/6
6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

emotionaltoleranceforthesightofshirtlessyoungmenwithcomplicatedmustaches
spideringupfiberglassoverhangs.

Fearoffallingisaboutasprimalafearaswehumanshave,andthatfearis
presenttosomedegreewhetheryouare10feetoffthegroundor3,000.Inthis
sense,Honnoldsspecialtyfreesoloingisadistillationoftheentireclimbing
worldscollectivefantasylife.Vanishinglyfeweliteclimbersmakecareersoutof
freesoloing,andplentycallitirresponsibleanddeplorable,butintheirheartof
heartstheyallrecognizeitasthefinalwordinbadassery.

AsforElCapitan,everyclimberfromEverestbasecamptotheBrooklynBoulders
gymrecognizesitastheindispensablecliff.TherearebiggercliffsonBaffinIsland
andsmallerbutsteepercliffselsewhere,butnocliffanywherecombinessuch
unrelentingsteepness,glassysmoothnessandinspiringimmensityhorizontalas
wellasverticalwithaqualityofsuchcoherentunity,ofbeingasinglesolidobject
sogiganticastoreliablyinduceatinglingawarenessofcreationsincomprehensible
mystery.

IcantellyoufromexperiencethatfirsttimeElCapitanclimberssometimes
finditsvastnessandverticalitysooverwhelminginducingsuchaheadyfusionof
vertigoandagoraphobiathat,evenstitchedtothewallbyafortunesworthof
gear,theyflipoutandretreat.Icantellyouthatwhensuchunsteadysoulsdo
managetoreachtheupperheadwallstypicallyafterthreeorfourdaysof
continuousupwardtoilandterrorandwild,screamingfun,livinginfilthoncanned
chiliandcandybarstheyhavebeenknowntodropdaypacksfullofmission
criticalequipmentandwatchinhorrorasthosedaypacksfreefallthroughspacefor
thousandsoffeettowardpinetreessofarbelowtheylooklikeminiatureshrubsina
modelrailroaddiorama.

ElCapitandoeshaveverticalfracturesthatallowexpertclimberstoinserttheir
handsandfeetandsometimesentirelegsandarmsandthentwistandflexthose
bodypartsinhighlytechnicalandpainfullyexhaustingwaysthatdocreatea
temporarygripovertheabyss.Still,somuchofthatcliffisdevoidofanythingthat
normalhumanbeingswouldrecognizeashandholdsorfootholdsthatthe
overwhelmingmajorityofElCapitanclimbersresortasIdidtoartificialaid.We

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 2/6
6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

inserthardwareintocracks,clipnylonstirrupstothathardwareandstandinthe
stirrups.Eventhen,westruggletostaycalminanenvironmentthatfeelslikeamile
wideplainofsmoothstonethatwehappenedtobelyinguponwhenitflippedto
verticalandswungushigherintotheskythananyoftheworldstallestskyscrapers
yetreach.Thementalstrainofburyingallthatfearforallthattimebecomesitsown
monumentaleffort.

EliteclimbersdofreeclimbElCapitan,meaningthattheymakeallupward
progresswithhandsandfeetontherock,andwithgearemployedonlyasasafety
net.Butthenatureoftherockissuchthatnoamountoffingerstrengthcanmakeit
feelentirelysecure.Muchoftheterrainissosmooththatitcanbeascendedonlyby
identifyinghalfimaginaryindentations,pressingshoerubberagainstthose
indentationssmearing,asthetechniqueisknownandthenhopingthatthe
rubberstickswhileyoueaseupward.

NobodyisbetteracquaintedwiththisaspectofElCapitanthanCaldwell,whose
2015climboftheDawnWallonElCapitan,withKevinJorgeson,isconsideredthe
hardestlongfreeclimbeverdone.Ifyoudonthaveyourbodypositionexactly
right,youcaneasilyslipandfall,Caldwelltoldme.Andifyoureatallnervous,
theresadownwardspiralwhereyoupullharderwithyourhandsandleanincloser
andyourfeetshootout,soittakesincredibleconfidence.

TheoverwhelmingmajorityoffreeascentsofElCapitaninvolvemanyfalls
alongtheway.ElCapitanalsohasremarkablyfewproperledgesalmostallfree
ascents,asaresult,involvequitealotofrestingonropesandhardwarebetween
upwardpushes.Nobodykeepsreliablerecordsofthesethings,butHonnoldsbest
guessastothenumberofpriorascentswithzerofallsandzerorestingonropeswas
perhapsoneortwo,includinghisownfinalpracticerunwithCaldwell.Virtually
nobody,inotherwords,hadeverclimbedElCapitanwithoutdanglingfromthe
safetynet,whichhelpstoexplainwhyElCapitanwasforsolongthefinalwordin
freesolohypotheticals,asin,Doyouthinkitsevenpossible?Willanybodyever
freesolotheBigStone?Thedoubtthatdrovethosequestionswasskepticismthata
humanmindcouldmaintainsuchfocusanddrivesuchfiercephysicalperfection
forsounbearablylong.

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 3/6
6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

ThatswhereHonnoldcomesin.Ifirstmethimin2014,attheYosemitehome
ofamutualfriendnamedKenYager.Honnoldalreadyhadsuchareputationfor
extremeboldnessthatIwassurprisedtofindanerdyyoungmanwithbigearsand
browneyesandanimpishimpulsetoteasegently,sweetlyanyoneburdenedby
theaveragehumanterrorofdeathbyplummeting.AnybodywhoknowsHonnold
wellcantellyouthatheissmart,funny,intellectuallysophisticated,politeand
considerate.Hereadsnonfiction,expressesgenuinecuriosityaboutothersandearns
thecaringaffection(andanxiety)offamily,friendsandevenacquaintanceslikeme.
Honnoldclimbsmorethananyonealiveendlessthousandsoffeet,ropedand
unroped,allovertheworldandhas,foradecade,honedhissystemfortackling
everbiggerfreesolos.

Likeanoutdoorsyperformanceartist,Honnoldrehearsesbigfreesolosonrope
first.Hecommutesupanddowncliffswithgearinordertoworkforentiredayson
smalltrickysections.Hememorizeslongsequencesofcomplexmovementlikea
clevermiddleschoolermemorizingPitoahundreddecimalplaces.Honnoldisalso
astudentofYosemiteclimbinghistorywhohasmethodicallybestedthemarquee
climbsofeveryYosemitefreesoloistbeforehim,andhehasspentyearsquietly
preparinghimselfforthefreesolotoendallfreesolos.Inthefinalweeks,Honnold
toldme,heclimbedaparticularlysmoothstretchabout500feetup,onrope,five
timesinarowwithonlyhisfeet,nohands.

ItstillfeltreallyinsecureandIstillalwaysfeltlikethefeetmightslip,hesaid,
butatthesametimeyourelike,Well,itsworkedeverytime.

Honnoldssangfroidonbigcliffsisalsosopeculiarthateventheworldclass
climberswhoconsiderhimadearfriendstruggletobelievethatitreallyisjustsang
froidandconfidence,andnotborderlinesuicidalrecklessnessoratleastamissing
screw.Lastfall,CaldwellhadanightmarethatHonnoldappearedathisfrontdoor
bloodiedandbrokenfromafall.

JimmyChin,himselfaworldclassbigwallclimberandanothermutualfriend
ofHonnoldsandmine,spentmuchofthelastyearmakingadocumentaryfilm
aboutHonnoldwithhiswife,ChaiVasarhelyi,duringHonnoldspreparationforEl
Capitan.Chintoldmethathefeltterribleinnerconflictoverhisinvolvementinthe

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 4/6
6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

project,atleastatthebeginning:Whatifthepresenceofcamerasencouraged
Honnoldtodosomethinghewouldnototherwisehavedone?

IhaveheardotherfilmmakerssaysimilarthingsaboutHonnoldinthepast,and
stillotherfriendsofHonnoldsjokethatwhenAlexwasababyhismothermusthave
steppedonhisamygdalathebrainregionthatcontrolsfear.Lastyear,fMRI
testingattheMedicalUniversityofSouthCarolinatiltedthescalestowardprecisely
thatexplanationanunderactiveamygdala,notanegligentmotherby
confirmingthatHonnoldsfearcircuitryreallydoesfirewithlessvigorthanmost.

Allsportsselectgeneticoutliersandprovidesystemsfortheirselfdevelopment.
Thatshalfthepleasureofbeinganobserver.Soitseemsonlyfairtoconsider
Honnoldsamygdalaandhisselfcontrol,disciplineandstrongfingersinthose
terms.

Intheweeksbeforethefinalascent,Chintoldme,hecamearoundtobelieving
thatHonnoldwasreadyandgaveanexplanationalongthesamelines.Ifyoulook
atAlexsbodyrightnow,Ihaveneverseenanythinglikeit,Chinsaid.Buthealso
hasthiscapacitytocompartmentalizefear,torationalizeit.Hisbrainissopowerful
thatifathoughtorfeelingisnotservinghimhecanputitaway.

ThatsnottosaythatHonnoldsfriendsstoppedfeelingwondermentandworry.
DuringHonnoldsfinalpracticerunwithCaldwell,Honnoldclimbedfirstthrough
thehardestsinglesectiononthecliff,aspotmorethan2,000feetupcalledthe
BoulderProblemashortandextremelyintricatesequenceofdelicatemovements
thatHonnoldworkedforyearstomasterandmemorize.AfterHonnoldfinishedthe
BoulderProblem,heperchedjustbeyondittogivepreciseinstructionstoCaldwell,
whoisinarguablythebettertechnicalclimber.

Itsaveryglassy,smooth,insecurecrux,Caldwelltoldme.Youhavejusta
coupleoflittleripplesforyourfeetandsomeverybadsmall,slopinghandholds.
AlexwasrightabovemeandIfollowedhisinstructionsandIstillfell.

Honnoldhimselfnevergrewcomfortableenoughwiththatmovetohavea
memberofChinsfilmcrewpresent.ItwasalittletoointimateandifIdidfall,

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 5/6
6/18/2017 ElCapitan,MyElCapitanTheNewYorkTimes

somedudewouldbetraumatized,Honnoldsaid,explainingthatheaskedChinto
deployonlyaremotelyoperatedcamerathere.

Somethingdefinitelycouldhavegonewrong,Chintoldme,ofHonnolds
climb.ButAlexwasgoingtoacethatexam.Therewasnodoubt.Hehadprepared
ineverywaypossibleandhefunctionsbestwhenthestakesarethathigh.WasI
nervous,still?Ofcourse,butifyousawhimclimbingAlexmovedbeyondthe
zone.Itwaseffortless.Itwasbrilliant.Idontevenknowifhewasbreathinghard.

Reasonablepeopleconsiderprojectsliketheseidiotictothepointofoutrage.
Thatisperfectlydefensible.Honnolddoesnthavechildren,buthedoeshavea
motherwholoveshimverymuch.Ifyoucountyourselfamongthoseinclinedto
negativejudgment,andevenifyoudont,Ihopeyoullindulgeamentalexercisefor
fun.AllowyourmindtorelaxintothepossibilitythatHonnoldsclimbwasnot
recklessatallthathereallywasbornwithuniqueneuralarchitectureandphysical
gifts,andthathisyearsofdedicationreallydiddevelopthosegiftstothepointthat
hecouldnotonlymakeeverymoveonElCapitanwithoutrest,hecoulddosowitha
tolerablyminusculechanceoffalling.Viewedinthatlight,HonnoldsfreesoloofEl
Capitanrepresentsamiraculousopportunityfortherestofustoexperiencewhat
youmightcallthehumansublimeaperformancesofarbeyondourcurrent
understandingofourphysicalandmentalpotentialthatitprovokesapleasurable
sensationofmystifiedawerightalongsidetheinevitablenausea.

DanielDuaneiswritingabookabouttheSierraNevada.

FollowTheNewYorkTimesOpinionsectiononFacebookandTwitter(@NYTopinion),
andsignupfortheOpinionTodaynewsletter.

2017TheNewYorkTimesCompany

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/09/opinion/elcapitanmyelcapitan.html?_r=0 6/6