Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

PAIN - SUFFERING AND FAITH

The following reflections on pain and suffering come out of some recent reflections that my wife
Angela and I have been making. These are informed both by our recollections of a Day of Reflection
on this topic, which was held many years ago in Wolverhampton and led by Sister Ishpriya and also
from our own personal lived experience.

Pain is inevitable, suffering can be optional’ Buddhist saying

There is a difference between pain and suffering. This is a difference that, so often, we
can fail to discern or understand. We are born in pain, experience it throughout life and
death itself is often painful, either physically, emotionally or spiritually. Childbirth itself is a
painful experience, both for the mother and the child. Life throws up challenges and
situations that bring pain.

The Buddha is attributed with the saying ‘Pain is inevitable, suffering can be optional’
These short reflections are influenced by a seminar on Pain and Suffering given by
Ishpriya Mataji and my own reflections and preparation for a series of Lenten Lectures,
delivered by Angela my wife and I on this topic. So I start these reflections from the
perspective of Lent – a Christian Season designed as a 40 day period of reflection in
preparation for Easter.

For Christians, Lent is a time prepare for the great feast of

Easter and to reflect on the journey Jesus the Christ took during
those last hours before his Passion – Death and Resurrection.
One aspect of this journey is His suffering and how His death and
resurrection brings meaning to this suffering. Now human
suffering is universal and complex and it has many causes or
roots. Some of these are nature itself, the physical, psychological
and spiritual abuse that we visit upon ourselves and upon others
and that still leaves many questions unanswered.

However, suffering has an element of choice to it. It is our ‘response to the pain’ We
cannot escape pain – the pain of losing a loved one, a child or our faculties as we grow
older but we have choice in our response to it let’s look at two examples
The first example comes from the great Austrian Psychologist Viktor Frankl and the
second from the pain and suffering of a mother whose child died very young.

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK

 Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

‘Despair is suffering without meaning’ – When we can find meaning in our

suffering there is no despair. ‘
(See Frankl Ma’s Search for Meaning p 132-133)

Frankl recounts working with an elderly man who had been married 45 years and had
lost his wife several years ago . He was in great emotional pain and suffering. He had
seen many psychiatrists and counsellors but was desolate. After a while Frankl asked
him ‘ Now that you know the great pain and desolation you suffer from the loss of your
dear wife. How do you feel she may have felt had you died first ? Without pausing he
immediately shouted back to Frankl ‘ I am glad she did not because I would never want
her to suffer like I am’ . Frankl responded ‘ So your pain , dreadful though it has been,
has saved your wife from similar suffering .After that session, the man began to ‘recover’
he still felt the pain of losing his wife but in finding meaning to his suffering his desolation
began to be healed by his consolation.

Another example is when a mother who has lost a child can find some meaning. Take
Anthony Nolan , who died because he could not be found a bone marrow transplant. His
mother went on to found the ANTHONY NOLAN TRUST with the largest data base of
bone-marrow donors. This foundation has assisted countless people and has saved lives.

Now, I am not suggesting that loss is easy but that finding meaning in the pain can begin
to ease the suffering. The pain of the loss may or may not remain. What changes is the
choices we make through finding meaning and this leads to less suffering. Somehow
our desolation is eased and we find consolation and this begins to make sense of the
quotation from Frankl above.

Throughout history, in all cultures and Faith Traditions, people have questioned the why
and how of pain and suffering. The reasons for and causes and meaning of, suffering is
for most, a difficult issue and there are no easy or ready answers. Some of our difficulty
could be caused by our, all too human, tendency to search for ‘sense’ but to paraphrase
Frankl ‘If we seek sense we often find non-sense. It is much better to seek meaning’.
Perhaps this search for meaning can only begin when we take up our responsibility for
our life and its choices. Doing this could lead us on to face one area of suffering where
we have a direct input and direct responsibility .and this is the whole area of ‘man’s
inhumanity to man’.

If we were to look at this, we could argue that suffering seems to be increasing in our
world and much of that is due to our choices. It can be caused by our own violence;
violence towards ourselves, others and our World. We need to face the responsibility of
our own choices in order to identify the suffering caused by OUR choices.

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK

 Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

As a Human Family, our wars are more violent, our abuse of the world and its
environment is growing and we are perhaps beginning to reap a ‘harvest of storms’ In the
past 100 years we have had several major wars, numerous other wars, episodes, still
continuing, of ethnic cleansing, famines induced by war, countless examples of trafficking
peoples, slavery, addictions, aggression and, particularly in the Western world, a growing
epidemic of depression

I find the following quotation from Frankl very helpful. ‘God is the partner of our most
intimate soliloquies. That is to say, whenever you are talking to yourself in utmost
sincerity and ultimate solitude – he to whom you are addressing yourself may justifiably
be called God ‘ Viktor Frankl (aged 15)

Arguably, one of the worst episodes of man’s

inhumanity towards man is the Nazi Holocaust of the
2nd world war. A war that caused so much suffering
and one whose impact continues to influence events,
particularly in the Middle East, where it has
exacerbated the conflict between Jew and Muslim and
thus influenced the tension between Islam and the
West. The Holocaust is often used to argue the futility
of Faith and Religion in the face of suffering.

However, a blind belief in a God who can somehow shield us from pain and suffering is
both dangerous and false. It can be part of our tendency to design, build and believe in a
‘Household God’ ( see my article on this). This brings me back to Frankl , and particularly
some reflections he made about Faith and suffering.

One of the greatest psychologists of the 20th Century was Viktor Frankl, a Jew from
Vienna. He survived four concentration camps, including Auschwitz. The following is an
extract from his book ‘Man’s Search for Ultimate
Meaning’ He argues about the real meaning of
faith and belief in God, a belief which he argues
that cannot ‘be imposed’ on people and reflects of
the impact of the Holocaust. He first outlines his
understanding of belief and faith and then,
drawing on his professional and personal life, he
addresses how faith responds to suffering – and
particularly the suffering Auschwitz. This is an
extensive quotation but an extremely important
one. It comes out of the lived experience of one
who suffered and yet transcended his suffering to
find meaning in and through it.

Children Released by Red Army

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK

 Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

‘Just believe’ we are told ‘and everything will be OK’. But alas, not only is this order based
on a distortion of any sound concept of a Deity, but even more important it is doomed to
failure. Obviously there are certain activities that simply cannot be commanded,
demanded or ordered. You cannot order anyone to laugh – if you want him to laugh, you
must tell him a joke. And if you want people to have faith and belief in God, you cannot
rely on preaching along the lines of a particular church, but must, in the first place, portray
your God believably – and you must act credibly yourself.
…………………………………………

He continues

Religion did not even die at Auschwitz, nor “after Auschwitz”, to allude to the title of a
book that was authored by a rabbi (who incidentally had not been there). I personally
think that either belief in God is unconditional or it is not belief at all. If it is unconditional it
will stand and face the fact that six million died in the Nazi Holocaust, if it is not
unconditional it will fall away if only a single innocent child has to die – to resort to an
argument advanced by Dostoyevsky.

The truth is that among those who actually went through the experience of Auschwitz, the
number of those whose religious life was deepened- in spite, not to say because, of this
experience- by far exceeded the number of those who gave up their belief. To
paraphrase what was once said about the effect that separation has on love, one might
say that just as the small fire is extinguished by the storm while a large fire is enhanced
by it- likewise a weak faith is weakened by predicaments and catastrophes whereas a
strong faith is strengthened by them

Now Frankl was an Austrian Jew. He came from a Tradition that not only has suffered
much but also has ‘struggled’ with the concept of suffering and how this impacts on their
relationship (Covenant) with God. Whereas, I , an Irish Catholic, come from a Celtic
Culture which respects and honours death and whose people also have suffered , albeit
not as much as the Jews. Thus I feel that Frankl’s words could be helpful to peoples of
different Faith Traditions or none. Because, they come from a lived experience of
suffering – a suffering caused by one of the greatest acts of man’s in humanity to man.
Yet Frankl, like Nelson Mandela and Mahatma Gandhi, could rise above his culture,
ethnicity and religion, and reach out with compassion, forgiveness and understanding to
their oppressors.

Frankl seems to be challenging much of the recent stance of the mainstream religions.
This is a stance that seems to have a narrow focus on their own ‘beliefs’, structure and
organisation. Now if that is all it meant, then that would not be too bad. However, history
shows us how dangerous such a narrow view can have.

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK

 Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

Many Atheists argue that the suffering caused by religion is in itself an argument against
believing in the existence of a God. Arguably, the Holocaust was an inevitable outcome of
the many, many centuries of Christian teaching and enmity against the Jews. This led to
pogroms, ghettoes and eventually to the Gas Chambers. In a sense the Christian West
bears much responsibility for the suffering caused to the Jews.

This was a suffering that could have been avoided and it merely mirrors and reflects the
continuing suffering caused by needless and prejudiced inter-faith disputes. Frankl is
right, when he challenges the way so many Christians, and other religions, focus so
narrowly on their own denomination.

However, whether a Theist or an Atheist, we need to avoid any tendency to over-

simplification. We have to willingly face our own inadequacies and take responsibility for
our actions, choices and behaviours that cause much of the pain and suffering in our
world. Whether we are believers or not, placing the responsibility or blame on a @God’ or
a ‘false belief in a God’ is too simplistic. We all need to take responsibility, respect each
other and learn to live on this shared planet. A Blue Planet that is like a ship in the vast
ocean of the cosmos. We need to find meaning and compassion.

As we search for meaning, the difference between SYMPATHY and EMPATHY becomes
crucial. We live in a world where people can often be very quick to offer their sympathy.
But sympathy lacks a certain power, a certain authenticity. Empathy and compassion
can help us, not only to find meaning, but to reduce the violence and suffering in our
world.

When we are really down and out and suffering we require much more than sympathy.
What is needed is a sense of empowering compassion, a sense of knowing that the
other, somehow not only shares our burden but can really be with us. Be ‘in our shoes’ so
to speak. Empathy is this . It is the ability to be with or beside the one who suffers.
Somehow it shows in our ability to really understand and supportively share another’s
burden.

Empathy comes from a deep understanding of the other and out of a sense of our mutual
inter-dependence. It springs from love and a genuine desire to help and support the
other. It is compassionate, helpful and supportive. Empathy requires us to first find
meaning in our own lives before we can reach out to others. This is best illustrated by the
following story.

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK

 Reflections on a Spiritual Journey : Excerpts from a Personal Journal

This is a story about Yehuda Bacon a famous Jewish Sculptor. As a boy, Yehuda
suffered in the Concentration Camps. He was an inmate and survivor of Auschwitz After
the War, he wrote about his time in Auschwitz and his experiences there. Here is an
important and brief extract where he tells of an important insight he had about finding
meaning in his suffering..

‘As a boy I thought : ‘ I will tell them about what I saw in the hope that people will change
for the better’ But people did not change and didn’t even want to know !

It was much later that I really understood the meaning of suffering. It can only have
meaning if it changes oneself for the better’

For me, this brings me back to the essential message of Jesus the Christ, the Master I try
to follow. Like many other great Teachers, he taught by his example and for Christians
He embodies, and is, God’s example to us on how to live a compassionate life .He had a
breath of vision as wide as his compassionate heart. He reached out to all, regardless of
gender, class, position or religion. Sadly, over the past two millennia, so many of his
followers have failed to follow this example. So Lent continues to provide us with the
opportunity to ‘repent’ – to turn around and change and begin to play our part towards
‘building a planetary vision and a universal heart’ and thus reducing suffering in our world.

Seeking Together – Helping to Create – A Planetary Vision – A Universal Heart of

Compassion.

Peter Creagh (2010)

© Peter Creagh ( 2010) Heartsease Training & Counselling , Shifnal, Shropshire, UK