I was sitting at my desk at home, now clouded by sudden rain, pounding erupted from

my door. I stand, with the book still open in my hand. Robert was standing in the doorway, his
body shaking from an emotion, or maybe more that I could not tell. Though there was a grin on
his face, and his blue eyes held a sense of dismay. Speeding to my side he brought me into a
heart clenching hug, I was shocked as his drenched clothes seeped through mine.
“R-Robert?!” my voice faltered, and his breath came as a darkened laugh against my
ear. “What’s happened?” When he released me, he reached for the knob of my radio, which
broke into a sound of static from lack of use. As the horrid noise faded a voice came slowly into
earshot.
“...Harbor was bombed I repeat Pearl Harbor was bombed! By what has been
determined as Japanese Aircrafts!” My legs altered to what seems like jelly, as heat rushed into
them and blood drained from my cheeks traveling downwards. I caved to the ground, Robert
wrapped an arm around my waist just before my knees hit the floor. Even though his wet
clothes surrounded me, I felt his warmth engulf me. I held onto the arm that kept me upright.
“Lane can you believe this?” his voice emanated with excitement, which brought me out
of my anxious state as he continued. “We won’t be in the dark anymore! We’ll have to go to
war now! Can you believe it?” His hand grazed my hair so gently, for the first time I had known
him I was scared in his arms. My whole body shook, I tried to push him away only to have him
hold onto me tighter, further drenching my clothes.
“W-What are you talking about!?” I snapped, the force of my voice traveled to my arms
as I shoved him away. “How can you think this is a good thing! Li says war is terrible, he and
Dad barely survived! And Dad died when I was 14! What’s wrong with you!” Unable to control
my emotions I continued to yell, as my arms retracted towards my chest. Robert’s face
hardened with a stot look. He grabs my wrists and separates my arms from each other, his blue
eyes holding my hazel eyes in place.
“Me?” he voice stalled as if he was keeping it from raising. “ What about you!? They
came back as heroes, and this is how you treat them!” With a harsh motion he chucks my arms
down, causing me to stagger. He lifts his hands to his head, his fingers digging into his skull
under his dark hair. “What the hell is wrong with you!” I flinch as his hands now grip my
shoulders, fear fills my body as he starts to shake me. His anger emanates from his brutal
shakes, as his voice gets louder and water droplets spray from his clothes. “WHAT IF IT WAS
ME!?” Robert froze when his own words hit his ears, his hands dropped from my shoulders. He
backed away as he realized what he said, I opened my mouth to question him, but the sound of
an opening door stalled my thoughts.
“What is going on!” I twitch as my brother’s voice travels throughout the house. Turning
my back to Robert I was tense as I heard Li’s cane tapping the floor, in rhythm with his
footsteps. Glancing at the dim hallway just across the front door, his tall but slightly weak body
makes it’s way around the corner. Once in the light it revealed his whitening blonde hair,
though it was dull colored his caramel eyes were lit with a healthy fire.
“L-Li…” My sight drops to the floor as I falter to come up with a logical idea, his
footsteps and cane clatter came closer slowly as if he was analyzing the situation. Suddenly the
radio went off again, all our heads turn to it once more. The same announcement goes off and
Li stiffens at the words.
“So, that’s it.” His gaze traveled to Robert, “I suppose you came to tell…us?” The dark
haired male hitched in place, his face became panicked and just like me before his mouth tried
to work out a response. Though when talking to someone who is 20 years your elder who can’t
be but hasty to answer such questions, especially if it’s the brother of your childhood best
friend.
“Y-Yes sir.” came Robert’s stalled mutter, he rubbed his right arm with his left hand. The
room grew with an uncomfortable air. Li rolled the top of his black cane in the palm of his hand,
then clamped his hand over the golden ball. My eyes widen as Li’s cane smacks into Robert’s
head, causing it to turn to the left sharply. A gasp comes from me at the same time a groan
came from Robert.
“Now see to it you don’t handle my sister in that way, or this same cane will knock your
head right off.” Li threatened before walking back down the hall, he turned his head before
stating. “But you should really have mentioned you were going to join the forces before that
whole outburst. It makes you look bad, well I’ll be seeing you.” And with that he vanished
around the corner. I switched my gaze back to Robert who was holding the right side of his
head, a dazed look on his face. Sighing I knelt then proceeded to grab his left arm with both
hands, pulling on it gently signaling for him to get up.
“...Sorry…” he sighed, pulling himself up. His head dropped as he stood completely, just
a head taller than me. “I didn’t mean…I scared you ...didn’t I?”
“It’s nothing…” I whispered, as his hand made contact with the top of my head.
“I know I did, and I deserved that.” He turned towards the door, his footsteps heavy. “I
didn’t want to tell you… about the other thing… but it’s the truth.” Robert raced out the door,
slamming it harshly. I felt empty suddenly, like I had just lost another family member.
 ✉
Here I was once again at this door, only this time every feeling felt worse than before.
Before me I saw Robert in his new uniform, the one of the air force. Showing nothing on the
outside, I felt the previous emptiness fill me again. Robert moved into the house, lightly pushing
me in as he closed the door.
“Hey, hey, hey.” He set his hands on my arms, “Lane no, we… we talked about it. I’ll be
fine, I promise.” It was only then did I realize I was crying as Robert wiped the tears away from
my blurred eyes with his thumbs. “ I don’t need your brother beating me with a cane.”
“Maybe you deserve it!” I snapped, smacking his hands away. “This is stupid!” A burst of
emotion replaced the dull emptiness. As Robert’s gaze held concerned, my mouth opened on
it’s own. “I hate you!” His eyes widen at my words, as soon as I realized them I rushed past him,
opening the door. Pushing him out I felt guilt rise in my throat, as I slammed the door behind
him falling to the ground. Pulling my legs closely against my chest, I try to hold in all my
emotions, concealing them in a ball. Oh god… What did I just do?! I mentally curse myself for
letting my emotions get the best of me again. Running my fingers through my hair, panic trails
around my body and my vision blurred once more. My throat chokes into a sob as I understand
the imprint I left on Robert just now. Sobbing I let my tear stained face fall into my palms, tears
both from when my parents had died start to shed. But new ones from my comprehension that
Robert may never come back formed as well. Pressing my hands against my mouth I tried to
stop my cries, but it was too late. Li’s footsteps approached me as did his cane taps. I feel his
hand stroked my head and he sat next to me in my huddled state. He said nothing, keeping his
hand on my head, lightly petting it every so often. My sobs continued, getting lighter and
smaller with the passing moments.
“I know, I know.” Li soothed, I reached for him, hugging him as if I would lose him any
moment too.
“He won’t...end up like Dad...r-right?” I pleaded, knowing even if he said yes there was
no clear possibility it would be true. Li sighed, setting his chin on my head, very much like he did
when I was younger.
“Robert is too stubborn, and he doesn’t take much risks like others his age.” He listed,
my stomach burned as he continued. “It will take a lot to take him down Lane.” I shook my
head, it was stupid to believe that.
“T-That’s stupid...besides there’s no way his heart could take it. He hardly uses it I
think.” I muttered, still upset with him, though sadness fell behind it.
“Ah well a heart's a heavy burden, now isn’t Lane… though-” His sentence was cut off by
a lung bursting cough, I move away from Li as he covers his mouth in an attempt to keep the fit
of coughs from coming.
“L-Li are you alri-” He held his unoccupied hand out, two slips of paper in it. I blinked
unsure what to do.
“Take...both and chose… you have a little while longer than the men…” He wheezed out,
taking the papers I saw they had written Jobs on top. “Remember, Dad always said the best
choices in life are the hardest ones.”

✉
 Li coughs into his hand as he read the letter I had placed on his bed to look over.
“You really should stop mentioning the war is pointless Lanie.” He scowled at the paper,
I turn and snatch it from his hand, frowning at the use of my childhood nickname. Muttering I
fold it into a basic paper airplane, then place it in an envelope.
“Well if men responded to letters that are sent to them, then it wouldn’t be a problem!”
I hissed, Li chuckled hoarsely at my angered reaction.
“Goodness you sound like the two of you are married.” He laughed, my cheeks redden
as I pulled my honey blonde hair into a tight bun.
“You must be insane, no one would want to spend their life with a thick headed idiot
like him!” I huffed before marching out of his room as he erupted into laughter. “Married to
Robert? That’s beyond anyone, never listens to anyone but himself. Always get him into
trouble.” I whispered angrily to myself. “And thanks to him leaving I have to do all the work, Li’s
injuries have finally caught up with them all these years. Not that working as a aircraft builder
makes me anymore sure of anything.” I pull the door open, coat in hand. Slipping it on I see
many other women dressed for work heading out their own houses. I closed the door behind
me as I see Miss. Mary walk past.
“Good morning Lane, how’s your brother doing?” Her voice was soft and soothing, as if
she was talking to a newborn. I smiled, and walked to meet with her in the driveway.
“Morning Miss. Mary, and he’s been alright. His coughing fits aren’t as bad as before.
Off to work at the vehicle factory?” I questioned after my brief overview of home. Miss. Mary
nodded as we proceeded our walk to work.
“Yes, might I ask what possessed you to get a job with aircrafts? Maybe a certain…
someone?” She inquired, I clear my throat heat floats over my body.
“W-What on earth are you talking about? I...I always wonder how they worked was all.”
I lied, as she peered over to me. Her eyes narrowed with suspicion, but she returned to her laid
back form.
“It’s strange how this war let all these women take a hold of these jobs. Maybe now my
husband will take me more seriously.” She silently cheered, I a small smile forms on my lips.
“Yeah that might just do it… well I’ll be seeing you Miss. Mary.” I waved to her as I
crossed the street.
“Take care Lane! I’m sure the man you're working for will appreciate it too!” Miss. Mary
called as I shook my head annoyed.

✉
I stared in disbelief at the envelope I’d just pulled out of the mailbox. The handwriting
on it was close to awful , and there was only one person I knew who wrote this horrible.
“This is unbelieveable, why now?” I questioned, setting it on the table. What could now
be so important that he would write back? I shook my head this was crazy, it had to have been a
trick. Angry I picked up the envelope ripping it in half, then flung it on the table. Walking
towards the sink tears pooled around my eyes. Has it really been that long since Li died? I
turned the faucet on, picking up the dirty dishes to clean them. Suddenly I felt uneasy, sure the
U.S. was working on a treaty with Japan, but they wouldn’t let go of their imperial rule.
“The war is over everywhere else but on that coast. What is it with men wanting to be
so powerful, people only get hurt in the end.” I reasoned, scrubbing the light oil stains off of the
plate. “Shouldn’t Robert have come back, not a stupid letter.” I jump back from the sink as the
plate I had scrubbed falls to the ground shattering upon impact. Running of to get the broom I
couldn’t help but think… Why was it so unsettling when it fell?

Today was August 6, 1945… and it was a horrible day. I had woken up surprisingly calm
that morning, which was strange since I had felt unsettled for many years after Li died. But
nothing last forever, as the day went on I noticed… two types of atmospheres as I walked to the
store. Both horror and joy was blended together, and this only caused me to be more confused.
Throughout the day it was like this, it was only when I went to go see Miss. Mary for some
clarity.
“Lane you really haven’t heard?” She probed, as I shook my head. Her voice held the
horror I felt all around me, sifting in her seat she cleared her throat. “The Air Force bombed
Japan.” Heat filled my throat as my head became fuzzed. I inhaled sharply through my nose
before questioning her with poisoned air.
“T-They did...what!?” I coughed, my body began to tremble as many thoughts filled my
mind. What could have happened to all those people, what if Robert was a part of it, what
if...what if what?
“It’s true, but that’s not all. Even before there was fire bombs every, hitting and burn
the smaller cities. The two bombs were called Little Boy and Fat Man, I know one was dropped
in Hiroshima.”Her voice became a whisper, even though this was traumatic news she sounded
like a gossiping teenager. I tried to comprehend what I was being told but all that came to mind
was Robert, was he a part of this… and if he was...what would I do?
“But...the treaty… we…” My words jumbled into mush. I couldn’t understand, this is
what war was...but why did Robert love it so much?!
“Little Boy was dropped in Hiroshima, turns out my uncle who was one of the people a
part of it’s building said that they shouldn’t use them. Him and his odd reading, he said that the
bomb testing reminded him of a quote from the Hindu scrip saying “I am become Death, the
destroyer of worlds”. Can you believe that? I guess life just isn’t cut ou-” I stood up unable to
hear anymore of this, I quickly mumbled an apology and ran out of the house. I felt dead inside,
there was no clear reason any of this should have happened… but it was too late. You can’t
rewrite history, and you can’t change it either.

✉
I couldn’t remember how many times I had been at that door, I couldn’t think at all to
be honest. I couldn’t tell if I was sick or worse, but when the door opened I just dropped to my
knees. Robert picked me up, concerned was emanate on his face. I was still too shocked to
understand, but I was snapped out of my death like state as Robert began to explain what had
happened all these years. He told me how he threw out all my letter, that he was angry I
couldn’t see his way. And that he was right in his choice, at that time he placed.
“When I was asked to drop the bomb I didn’t know that was it. They just asked me to be
a part of it, and the next thing I knew I was in the Enola Gay flying with that insane bomb.” He
fumbled, I stared at him with my dull gaze. My mind had no clue what to do, was I angry, hurt,
scared. Maybe I was all of them, but I was so confused all i could do was cry. I broke into loud
wails as I realized Robert was a part of a mass killing, and that my father and brother also killed
many people.
“Why didn’t you just leave? You had a chance when the others stopped?” My sobs
shook my whole body as I muffled my cries in my hand causing me to hiccup. “I didn’t know
where you were or if you were ok!”Robert’s head hung low as I fell apart.
“I didn’t know...I’m sor-”
“That won’t bring any of those people back!” I shouted, as the sobs became mostly
hiccups and gasps. “Those letter were just like all those damaged planes...faulty…”
“I guess you’re right…” He sighed holding his head in his hands.
“We’re just Faulty Paper Airplanes.” I muttered, “All of us are.”