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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
He did not. We’re all a little poorer today, there is a little bit
less light than there was on Saturday or Friday or the day
before because he is gone. I still can’t wrap my head around
that reality, so I write. About who he was, what he did, why it
matters, not just to me, but to you.
Little memories
My earliest memory: Lee as my mother’s
mischievous little brother, leaving his
tropical fish tank for her to fishsit. There
was nowhere to put it but my little
bedroom and the tank was a stinky thing. Lee and I,
Vague recollections of formaldehyde- 1963
preserved octopi in jars in my
grandmother’s garage. His collection of
vintage 7-Up bottles stored away that I helped him find back
in the days where recycling meant re-using. We’d pick
through the bottles in the market and find the old ones.
There was Lee coming home from college at Cal and poking
my mother in the side to make her squeal before laughing in
his delightful deep baritone melodic voice.
Always: 7-Up and Rocky Road ice cream. We never had those
things unless Lee came home. Then it was a feast of soda and
ice cream and fun. Even now, Rocky Road evokes memories of
Lee, returning home from school to picnics, celebrations, and
lots of Rocky Road.
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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
This isn’t to say that there weren’t times where I’m certain
my mother would have preferred that he didn’t tell his
stories, or teach us some of his more irreverent, sardonic
takes on things. Like, for example, when I was booted out of
kindergarten for reciting the little childhood nursery rhyme.
Most children learn the end of that ditty differently than the
way he taught me. The word at the end there is usually
“people.” The one I learned was “hypocrite.” And then I
learned exactly what hypocrites are. I learned so well, in fact,
that when I showed off my newly-acquired knowledge for
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Uncle Lee could not possibly be wrong. Clearly the school was
mistaken in their judgment, and after my mother begged and
cajoled me back into the school (but not their good graces), I
learned to keep any new things I might learn to myself. I was
relieved to go to public school the following year, and never
looked back. (I’m sure my mother didn’t either.)
“…even roses grow in shit,” he wrote. That was one of the most
profound and simple reassurances I ever received and I never
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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
Foreign Service
In retrospect, Coldren appears to have specialized in
mountainous, drug-producing ancient countries prone to
instability and terrorism. Following two years in Peru, he
worked at the U.S. Embassy in Kabul from 1974-77. After
covering Sri Lanka at the Department of State and spending
two years in India, he returned to Afghanistan in 1980 to run
the embassy and cover the Russo-Afghan War. During that
time Coldren wrote several articles for Asian Survey. Escaping
South Asia in 1982, Coldren was deputy director of Korean
Affairs prior to a three-year assignment to Indonesia. As
consul general in Surabaya, Coldren focused on the politics of
traditional and radical Islamic movements in eastern
Indonesia. He then spent three years as deputy chief of
mission in Dhaka, Bangladesh before returning to Washington
in 1993.
During his last stint in Washington, Coldren was director of
Pakistan, Afghanistan and Bangladesh Affairs and traveled
often to that region–especially Afghanistan–to meet with
factions and warlords. Opposing the conventional wisdom of
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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
Uncle Lee, and people like him, are the public servants that
comprise “government.” They serve and do so honorably. He
served and did so honorably. Every time I hear some
Republican idiot go on about how they should “shrink
government” I wonder if they consider the fact that if he had
been listened to, if attention had been paid to what he was
saying by Republican and Democrat alike, perhaps thousands
of lives might have been saved. Shrinking “government”
means cutting off good people who serve their country with
words, not guns, who attend to poverty and need here and
abroad, and who in times past did not live to serve their
oligarchs. Yes, he was “government”, and he was damn good
at it too. More “government” like him, please.
Retirement
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7/30/2018 An Extraordinary Life: Lee O. Coldren 1943-2012 – odd time signatures
After he retired, I got to spend a bit more time with him and
Mary in Sacramento. Trips to the Farmer’s Market, long talks,
playing with their friend’s pug, admiring Mary’s amazing art,
all woven into the fabric that brought us together more as
friends than the avuncular relationship of the past.
(Avuncular: a word he used in a letter when I was sixteen or
so, and one I had to look up at the time.) Mary’s influence
smoothed his rough edges, and their children took care of the
ones Mary didn’t get to.
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Yes, they are. Until they’re not, and yet there are still those
connected, the sons, the daughters, the friends, the
community of us who knew him.
There is only this time. This short time. For Lee, 25,277 days.
A life, extraordinary, occupying 25,277 days. They pass, and
then they end, and we have memories, photographs, gifts,
stories. They’re the part that remains.
I will miss you, Lee. You are as woven into the fabric of my
being as if I were wearing a coat. I will miss you, as will we all.
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