Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Tristan Zapata-Pulido
Professor Granillo
English 101
6 November 2018
Some might consider you to be feminine if you even show a small amount of emotion. It
is common for men to not show their emotions, as guys in today’s culture find it as being
feminine or as some would call it “gay”. In many cases men would only show anger for every
situation to avoid showing their true emotions. Therefore, in contrast to those who would find it
to be feminine to show anything other than anger, men are devoid of their emotions that make
them men. In Andrew Reiners “Teaching Men to Be Emotionally Honest” he discusses the issue
of men thinking it is not manly to show emotion. Although Reiner and others would argue that
men are deemed less emotional; though with a rise in metrosexual and stay at home fathers the
tough guy stereotypes die hard. Men have been seen to be falling behind women in school, along
with having a higher rate in suicide, if they learn to think beyond their own stereotypes they can
Andrew Reiner is a writing and cultural teacher at Townson University, along with a
course called “Real Men Smile: The Changing Face of Masculinity”. Reiner examines how the
perception of masculinity have and haven’t changed since the eighteenth century. Plenty of his
work has been published in papers from the New York Times, Washington Post Magazine,
Chicago Tribune, etc. His article “Teaching Men to Be Emotionally Honest” had first appeared
in the New York Times on April 10, 2016. His course is full of research from the places such as
Boston Children’s Hospital, along with other professors. With Reiner teaching a course on the
Zapata-Pulido 2
changes of the perception of masculinity he was motivated to prove that there the decrease of
While it has come to notice that men have fallen behind in society it was what motivated
him to write his article. It was stated by reiner that “As men continue to fall behind women in
college, while outpacing them four to one in the suicide rate…”. This is where men are starting
to fall behind in society, these negative effects of not showing emotion makes them feel as if
they have no one to go to. Though there are men who are falling behind in society, all these
While it has come to notice that men have fallen behind in society it was what motivated
him to write his article. It was stated by reiner that “As men continue to fall behind women in
college, while outpacing them four to one in the suicide rate…”. This is where men are starting
to fall behind in society, these negative effects of not showing emotion makes them feel as if
they have no one to go to. Though there are men who are falling behind in society, all these
Though there are the struggles with the stereotypes of masculine norms; the emergence of
metrosexual men and stay at home dads are making these stereotypes die hard. Metrosexual men
are seen as what this generation would call “homo” but are rather just straight men with a refined
taste in things. It is become a bit more common for men to have these views, along with having a
liking to fashion; this is more in a sense of wanting to look good, it has nothing to do with
sexuality. Stay at home dads are starting to become more accepted by people in society; in
addition to Reiner’s counter, an article by Patrick Tucker who spoke on stay at home dads. To
add to the emergence of fathers who work from home, there are more bonds that come between
Zapata-Pulido 3
them and the child, this doesn’t show any decrease in masculinity. Though the stereotypes have
been dying there are still those who fall behind in society.
A big area in society that affects men in the long run is in school, where men have fallen
behind women. To account for this decrease, in Reiner’s article he stated, “By the time may
young men get to college, a deep-seated gender stereotype has taken root… about themselves as
learners.”. Men find it that they would rather gain their Man Card, rather than succeed like a girl;
or that extracurricular activities are girly. In contrast to that boys who take part in these activities
have been reporting to have better grades along with higher levels of school engagement. But
these activities are being slandered by young men, resulting in those stereotypes of there being
femininity in education. As these types of stereotypes affect boys in school as they transition to
Throughout the whole entire school system from elementary and after, consistently show
that girls have always had higher performance levels. This is why it has come to show that men
have fallen behind in college and the rates aren’t changing. Stated in Reiners article, “In 1994,
according to a Pew Research Center analysis 63% of females and 61% of men enroll in college;
by 2012 …the percentage of men has gone unchanged.” (591). This unchanged number of men
could be a result of men having those stereotypical views of succeeding being girly. With the
enrollment numbers being low the rate of acceptance is another area to dive into.
While the enrollment numbers show the amount of men applying it is important to see
how many are being accepted. In an article pulled from the database by the Women in Academia
Report stated that “…the acceptance rate for all women was 57.4%” along with the “acceptance
rate for all men was 53.9%”. Even though there is such a small dificit between men and woman
there are more than a million fewer applications that are place by men. As a result of the
Zapata-Pulido 4
decrease in enrollment in colleges, as well as a lower acceptance rate this a reason men could
Now while men in society are not just falling behind in school but are outpacing women
in suicide rates four to one. This could come from falling behind in school along with being less
expressive in everyday life. One issue in school that may cause boys and men to turn to taking
their own lives could come from the stress and failure they go through. Outside of school men
could be dealing with hiding who they really are, and not showing their true feelings. Perhaps it
is that some men lead a life where they are insecure and have secret’s they feel will hurt
themselves. Both issues lead to a rise in suicide rates which is why men are falling behind in
society.
In relation to school, it is a factor that not only holds men back academically it could also
be a cause of suicide. In a survey I created on survey monkey I asked some coworkers and
friends in high school; the short survey was based on men showing emotion, but mainly about
school making suicide rates go up. Some questions were what was believed to cause suicide rates
in students ranging from high school to college. What I found was that it was though that to
much work causes stress leading to poor decisions; eventually down the line these decisions can
lead to suicide rates. The reason that kids stress over to much work is that they get overwhelmed
In a survey I conducted I wanted to cover some areas about suicide rates that are caused
by school. I sent it to a couple of my coworkers along with some friends, all of which were men,
who are in high school currently. The overall research was to find out how students felt in school
and if they would consider themselves as one who stresses over work and finds themselves
wanting to quit.
Zapata-Pulido 5
Based on my results many students and others, I found that many students agree that too
much work causes a lot of stress; ultimately leading to failure. I find this to be the biggest reason
that kids will find themselves stressed out about school, teachers who will give out too much
work with little time to complete. It has been noted that giving kids more time to work and get a
start on their assignments can result in more effort put into the work. In personal experience
around my senior year my classmate had a petition with the principle that seniors would have a
maximum amount of work given. The end result was that teachers give us moderate amounts but
more time in class to get a head start, and to the principles surprise the class of 2018 had almost a
perfect graduating class. Although it is not just stress alone there are factors that are caused and
Some would see that many factors of failing caused by stress are what makes students
give up, having a lack of motivation. I found this in question 3, but along with lack of motivation
were bad choices, suicide, and all of the above. With the real highest choice being all of the
above, many of my peers thought that all three are caused by too much stress. There has been
only one case where a student has taken his life at my school, and I had been related to stress and
falling behind in school. I myself have found each one of these factors to lead to the next, but
there are all things that male peers have said, and I feel as if it has to do with norms of us falling
behind.
In relation to the male stereotypes of men being less expressive, which holds them back
in society, including school. Most of those who answered showed that they stress, but in another
question asking if they could go to any staff member for help; many of them said they were able
to see a teacher for assistance. But the it was highly voted that they could go to them sometimes,
and some said never. I wanted to ask this question because I feel this is where the stereotype falls
Zapata-Pulido 6
deeply; men feel as if they can do the work and don’t need any help because they are “a man”.
But with men falling behind in school, they don not go to anybody because like stated before,
succeeding is girly. It shouldn’t be the thought of being girly that holds us back nor should being
emotional.
To conclude my survey, I asked two small questions about how men feel about being
emotional. I wanted to know how they felt about what can lead to suicide and if it normal for
men to be expressive. When relating to suicide I asked if men hide how they really feel and have
nobody to talk to can that lead to suicide. It was mainly between people choosing either having
nobody to talk to, or both; I agree that both hiding your true emotions and not having someone to
talk to is a big factor. It makes them feel as if they are alone and the struggles they go through
can not be helped. This is in relation to the ways men fall behind in school and in society, with
, men are stereotypically seen as strong and call out those who show emotion. It should
not be considered “gay” for a man to show emotion, but these stereotypes are dying; the rise in
metrosexual men and stay at home dads is breaking down these manly stereotypes. Men should
learn that it is not only anger that is “allowed” and be more aware that it is fine for men to show
any other range of emotion. With Andrew Reiners article along with other that speak on the
issues of men falling behind in society, it should be noted that with this decline that men should
look beyond their own stereotypes and not be devoid of the rights and wrongs of the male norms.
Zapata-Pulido 7
Appel, M., & Kronberger, N. (2012). Stereotypes and the achievement gap: Stereotype threat
doi:http://ezproxy.canyons.edu:2069/10.1007/s10648-012-9200-4
DDB worldwide; stay-at-home dads: Uncommon and exceptional - findings from the 2013 DDB
life style study(R). (2013, Jul 05). Health & Medicine Week Retrieved from
http://ezproxy.canyons.edu:2048/login?
url=https://ezproxy.canyons.edu:2457/docview/1371392480?accountid=38295
Reiner, Andrew. “Teaching Men to Be Emotionally Honest”, They Say/ I Say, Edited by Gerald
Graff, Kathy Birkenstein, Russel Durst. 4th Edition, W.W. Norrton, 2018. pp. 589-595
The nationwide gender gap in college acceptance rates. (2016). (). Bartonsville: BruCon
http://ezproxy.canyons.edu:2048/login?url=https://ezproxy.canyons.edu:2457/docview/1
755646437?accountid=38295
https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/7WM9DKW