WEEK 51 : AVOIDING MISUSE

AVOIDING THE MISUSE OF BOUNDARIES IN MARRIAGE

1. What were boundaries designed for? How do you feel about that design?

2. What is your experience with setting limits in marriage? Has it caused you more suffering?

3. How have you seen Romans 5:3-4 play out in your life?
Romans 5:3-4 New Living Translation (NLT)
3 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us
develop endurance. 4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character
strengthens our confident hope of salvation.

4. What are some benefits you have gained in your marriage that came from suffering?

Copyright 2018 by Affair Recovery, LLC. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any
form without the express written permission of Affair Recovery, LLC. Based in Austin, TX and with a global reach, AffairRecovery.com
specializes in helping people heal after infidelity. To learn more about weekend retreats or online courses, visit www.AffairRecovery.com.
Page 137 of 142
5. Have you personally experienced Proverbs 19:19 with relationships in your life?

Proverbs 19:19 New Living Translation (NLT)

19 Hot-tempered people must pay the penalty. If you rescue them once, you will have to do it
again.

6. Explain your definition of Godly suffering and ungodly suffering.

7. How in the past have you attempted to set boundaries by setting an ultimatum?

8. What disruptions have you witnessed in your relationships due to unforgiveness?

Copyright 2018 by Affair Recovery, LLC. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any
form without the express written permission of Affair Recovery, LLC. Based in Austin, TX and with a global reach, AffairRecovery.com
specializes in helping people heal after infidelity. To learn more about weekend retreats or online courses, visit www.AffairRecovery.com.
Page 138 of 142
9. What does Ephesians 5:22-23, 25 mean to you?

Ephesians 5:22-25 New Living Translation (NLT)

22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the
head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Saviour of his body, the church.

25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his
life for her

10. Explain the meaning of John 3:19-21.

John 3:19-21 New Living Translation (NLT)
19 And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved
the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. 20 All who do evil hate the light
and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed. 21 But those who do what is right
come to the light so others can see that they are doing what God wants.[a]”

Footnotes:
3:21 Or can see God at work in what he is doing.

Copyright 2018 by Affair Recovery, LLC. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any
form without the express written permission of Affair Recovery, LLC. Based in Austin, TX and with a global reach, AffairRecovery.com
specializes in helping people heal after infidelity. To learn more about weekend retreats or online courses, visit www.AffairRecovery.com.
Page 139 of 142
OPTIONAL MONTHLY TRUTH IN LOVE
Revisiting Speaking the Truth in Love. Challenge yourself to come up with at least one
appreciation your spouse has not heard yet.
1. List 3 things you appreciate about your spouse:
a. Describe what it is you appreciate
b. Give a specific example
c. Tell him/her how it makes/made you feel
2. List 3 amends you need to make (current or historical)
a. Specify what you did or didn't do
b. Give a specific example
c. Tell them how you think it must have made them feel
d. Ask for forgiveness
3. List 3 wounds and or offenses you have
a. Describe what happened that hurt or offended you
b. State how that made you feel...start with "I feel or felt..."
c. Tell them what you need or desire as a result of this
d. Tell them whether or not you harbor a root of bitterness over it
4. List 3 things you appreciate about your spouse using the guidelines above.
We realize that for some of you this may not be an easy exercise. What we are trying to help
you do is to get the emotional/relational slate clean between the two of you and to keep it
that way. That's it is beneficial for you to do this every 4th week ongoing. Remember that
what the goal in your marriage is loving, honest, consistent communication. You have got to
learn how to share who you are and what you feel naturally and consistently.

Copyright 2018 by Affair Recovery, LLC. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any
form without the express written permission of Affair Recovery, LLC. Based in Austin, TX and with a global reach, AffairRecovery.com
specializes in helping people heal after infidelity. To learn more about weekend retreats or online courses, visit www.AffairRecovery.com.
Page 140 of 142