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GHEEBAH [BACBITING]

• Sufyân ath-Thawrî (rahimahullâh) said, "When your brother is out of your sight,
mention him as you would like him to mention you when you are out of his sight."
• Mujahid said: “The expiation for eating the flesh of your brother is that you praise him and
pray for good for him, and similar is the case if he died”

Gheebah or backbiting is the beginning of our discussion today. It is a disease we have amongst
us, such that one would say something about another, such that the other would not have liked
should he have been present. Allah SWT informs us in suratul hujarat that this action is like
eating the flesh of your brother!

“O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion, indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy
not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead
brother? You would hate it [so hate backbiting]. And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the
One who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful” Al-Hujarat: 12

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “Backbiting is mentioning something
about your brother that he dislikes.” [Maalik & Ibn Mubaraak]

How many transgressions are entered into in committing this evil of backbiting?

2 transgressions are committed:

1. Against Allah SWT – How do you remedy this? By undertaking the steps of Taubah [Learn
these and fight to succeed].

2. Against the person – How do you remedy this? It is dependent on whether this person has
found out about this evil you did or he has not found out.

3. If he found out, then a part of the taubah is to seek his forgiveness

4. If he did not find out, then a part of the taubah, is to do things like speak good about
him in a similar sitting as the one in which one spoke evil of him, and to make du’ah for
him as well.

What’s the difference between backbiting [Gheebah] and


slandering [Nameemah]?
• “Backbiting is to mention about a person something about him in his absence”.
[Abu Dawood]
• The Messenger (peace be upon him) said: “Do you know what is gheebah
(Backbiting)? They said “Allah and His Messenger (peace be upon him) know best.”
He (peace be upon him) said: “Mentioning about your brother what he would hate
(in his absence)’. It was said: ‘What about if what I say about my brother is true?’
He (peace be upon him) said: “If what you said about him is true then you would
have backbitten him, and if it is not true, then he is slandered (buhtaan).” [Muslim]
So, backbiting can be defined as: “Mentioning about a person in his absence
something he would hate even if it is a characteristic he possesses.”

• Gheebah = speaking about someone + not present + they will not like it + may be truth.

• Nameemah = The above, just change the last to ‘it is falsehood’

Is this ruling absolute? Can you never speak of another?

Our First case has three rules from it and a sub-rule

Hind, the wife of Abu Sufyaan, came to the Messenger (peace be upon him) and said:
“Abu Sufyaan is a miserly man and he does not give me enough for me and my child
except that I take from him and he does not know. “ The Messenger (peace be upon him)
said: “Take what is commonly known as enough for you and your child.”
[Bukhari & Muslim]
Three rules:

a. If you being oppressed, you can seek judgment from the one that can help and that would
require you to mention the oppressor or backbite him – and this is permissible

b. If one is seeking a ruling and they need to mention the bad characteristic of another, then
backbiting here is permissible

c. If you seeking to right a wrong, or claim your right, then you will have to backbite the
oppressor to have the one who is in authority to give you permission to take your right –
permissible here.

Sub-rule:

- surely all actions are by intention: If you expose someone to a judge or other than that –
under the guise of claiming your rights – with no wish to correct their wrong or save them
from the Wrath of Allah – Your backbiting will be held against you!

Gheebah is also permissible in Enjoining the good and forbidding the evil!

a. If a sin is done in public: It is permissible to make it known the innovation or sin of


another – Reason? to protect people from also entering into it. Caution: always check
your reasons for doing things

b. If a sin is done in private – the exposing it to 1 person or many – is gheebah!

c. Warning someone of a sinner or deviated person – Reason? to protect them or try to


safeguard them from falling into the sins. Caution: always check your reasons for doing
things

“Help one another in righteousness and piety; but do not assist one another
in sin or transgression” [Al-Maaidah 5:2]

Some other areas that are permissible:

a. Warning someone of dealings with another due to his treachery being known
b. Warning muslims against evil & advising them.

c. In marriage and business transactions one must mention the faulty characteristics.
Fatimah bit Qays sais; ‘I came to the Prophet and said to him ‘Mu’awiyah and abu Jahm
sent me proposals for marriage’ The Messenger of Allah said, ‘Abu Jahm is very hard on
women and Mu’awiyah is destitute and he has no property” Sahih Muslim

In summary, gheebah is permissible when in:

• Complaint [As the wife to the Prophet S.A.W. about her husband]

• To return order to to bring back good and remove the evil

• Seeking fataawah [judgement, ruling or claiming rights]

• Seeking help to change a wrong

• Forbidding evil regarding a public evil

• Seeking help to prevent some disaster to a muslim

• Offering advice and or warnings

What are the root causes of gheebah?

Anger

Someone made us angry, and we need to get it of our chest, so we share it / discuss it with
someone else, and enter the sin. The cure for this is the advice of the Messenger (peace be upon
him):

• “Whoever suppresses his anger while in a position to enforce it, Allah will call him at the
head of the creation until he chooses for him from the hoor ‘een (special women of Jannah
that are promised to the believer), for him to marry from them as he pleases.” [Ahmad
and At-Tabaraanee]

• Here must we must know that certain types of anger are commenadable, some sinful and
some blameworthy as well. A scholar once said: “Beware of excessive anger for it leads
you to embarrassment of having to apologies”

• Reported in Bukhari, that Muhammad S.A.W. said: “The strong person is not he who
overcomes others with his strength, rather it his him who controls himself in the face of
anger”

Some remedies for this great problem:

• SD

• Allah’s Remembrance
• When Umar R.A. was about to strike a man, he was reminded by another sahaabi, that
Allah SWT told Muhammad S.A.W. “Hold to forgiveness, command what is right, and turn
away from the ignorant” 8:199

• Fear Allah SWT’s punishment

• Reflect on the outward manifestations of anger and its ugly nature: how do you look?

• Remind yourself of Allah’s decree

• What are the possible consequences of vending your anger?

• Seek refuge in Allah

• “When one of you becomes angry, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and
good, otherwise he should lie down” Ahmad and Tabarani

• Increase invocation and supplication to Allah SWT

• N.B. Muhammad S.A.W. woulkd get angry, to an extreme when Allah’s rights are violated –
be balanced!

I keep quiet because it is my friend who is backbiting


So the friend will be engaging in backbiting and he will not say anything, as mentioned
previously: “So one may ask then, the reality is that most people feel hurt when you
correct them, or harmed when you try to stop them from some evil – so what do I do?”
The cure is from Muhammad S.A.W. : ““Whoever solicits the pleasure of men by
displeasing Allah, Allah will consign him to mankind.” [At-Tirmidhi]
Seeking to gain status or position etc.
Simplest example: speaking ill of others and glorifying ones-self in front of the ‘boss’, or
taking the opportunity to run your colleague down when it presents itself, rather than
try to uphold his honor. The cure is knowing and remembering that there is always
someone better than you, that can do the same to you and as the saying goes ‘what
goes around, comes around’
Using others as the butt of the joke – mocking and sarcasm is included here
I once was at a brothers place and he happened to be watching a stand up comedian.
Initially it was funny and he was good at what he did, but then I realized, by the mercy
of Allah SWT, that this is partaking in a huge sin – something immense, that aids in the
hardening of the heart and distraction from working for Jannatul Firdoes [and how much
do we do for this bro’s] Alhamdulillah I excused myself and left before entering further
into sin, and advised the brother later after the time lapsed for him to know that it is
not a malicious attack on him.

- “O you who believe! Let not a group scoff at another group, it may be
that the latter is better than the former...” [Al-Hujuraat 49:11]
- At other times, it could involve lies, as mention is made of some people in a way
to make others laugh. It is enough to answer with the statement of the Messenger
(peace be upon him): “Woe to the one who speaks and lies to make people
laugh, woe to him, woe to him.” [Ahmad, Abu Dawood & others]

- Hadith - Abu Dawud 4782, Narrated Abu Umama: “The Prophet (peace be
upon him) said: I guarantee a house in the surroundings of Paradise for a man who
avoids quarrelling even if he were in the right, a house in the middle of Paradise for a
man who avoids lying even if he were joking, and a house in the upper part of
Paradise for a man who made his character good. [Saheeh: Abu Daawood and al-
Bayhaqee, authenticated by al-Albaanee in as-Saheehah]

Envy
“Faith and envy cannot exist together in the heart of the slave”. [Ahmad 8:
436], and it is through envy that is prohibited, envy of his position or status or what
Allah has granted him – it is through this envy that this man engages in eating the flesh
of his muslim brother. However at the same time he may engage in permissible envy.
An explanation of its meaning is: “Envy/Hasad is a grievance that befalls one due to
knowledge of the good condition of the wealthy”

“It is a desire to have the blessings removed from the one who is envied even if the one
who is jealous does not attain the liked of these blessings”

Here one gets Hasad and Ghubta both referring to envy. The former is haraam, the
latter permissible and mentioned in the hadeeth As narrated by Abdullah Ibni Mesud,
the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said: "Only these two people should be envied:
One is the person who spends his wealth Allah gave him on the path of
righteousness, and the other is the person who judges with the knowledge
Allah gave him and teaches it to others." (Bukhari)

• Umar displayed Ghubta: Trying to compete with Abu Bakr in giving charity ad
after loosing saying : “I will never be able to better you in anything”

• Moosa displays Ghubta: “Cried due to the extent to which the Prophet S.A.W has
surpassed him. So it was said to him: ‘Why are you crying? He replied ‘I am crying
because there is a servant who shall be sent after me, and more of his nation shall
enter paradise than mine”

Other points of backbiting overlooked:


• When we speak of someone, and say that we will inform him of what we said.
This does not change the sin of backbiting having taken place, as it was done while the
person backbitten was not present initially.

• Indirect backbiting, when someone is mentioned and refuge is sought from being
like him, this is also backbiting as it is something that is said that he will not be pleased
with should he have been present

• If someone says a person is being tested with such and such, while he is not
present, is not the definition stated earlier: ““Mentioning about a person in his absence
something he would hate even if it is a characteristic he possesses.”

In summary of the points that lead to backbiting:


- Anger
- Not addressing a friend who is backbiting
- Seeking status through it
- Mocking in jest at others
- Envy
- Speaking of someone then saying I will tell him later
- Indirect backbiting
- So and so is being tested

WHAT TO DO?

1. Correct the one backbiting or stop him


2. Defend the brother who is being backbitten
3. If the person does not stop his evil, and you have tried to stop him or change the
subject, then it is best to excuse yourself and walk away
4. Do not participate
5. If you happen to fall into it – then repent to Allah, and check what steps you must
take to correct your error – take them now!
6. Fear the consequences of you participate
7. Forgive someone if they backbit you
8. Abu Hurrairah R.A. said; “One of you sees the dust in his brothers eye but fails to
see the crud in his own eye”
Beware: During the incident of the Mi’raj, it is narrated that “The Prophet
passed by a group of people and copper fingernails, with which they
scratched their own faces and chests. Upon this witnessing this he asked
‘Who are those, Jibril?’ and he was told In response ‘Those are the people who
eat the flesh of other people and vilify their honor”
Nameemah [Slandering]
The homework for this week, is to go and research the incident of slander of Ayesha R.A.

a. The verses in qur’an

b. The tafsir of those verses

c. The lessons drawn

d. Points of action for the believer

InshaAllah I will get an electronic copy of this assignment from each brother by next Tuesday
night., divided into the 4 points above.

A rule of thumb in our time, and take note of the type of person spoken off, as sometimes we
apply it incorrectly and can cause harm, and sometimes it is necessary to do so:

“O you who believe! If a wicked person comes to you with any news, ascertain the
truth, lest you harm people unintentionally and afterwards become full of repentance
for what you have done” 49:6

Important point of note for us: A rule of thumb, is that if a muslim comes to you, first
you think good of him. If he is non- muslim, then the above immediately may be put
into effect.

Slander is a more heinous sin than backbiting, since it involves not only backbiting but
also lying with intent to maliciously dishonor a Muslim.
How is backbiting also included? The person is spoken off, and he is not present.
• The Messenger (peace be upon him) also said: “...And whoever knowingly argues
uselessly, Allah will continue to be angry with Him until he refrains from it, and
whoever says about a believer, that which is not in him Allah will house him in a
mill of the people of the fire of Jahannam until he leaves off what he said...” [Abu
Dawood, Al-Haakim & others]
Is not slander falsehood being propagated?

Some proofs from qur’an regarding slander:

• “A slanderer, going about with calumnies,” 68:11

• “Woe to every slanderer and backbiter.” 104:1

• “And those who annoy the believing men and women undeservedly, they
bear the crime of slander and plain sin” 33:58
Tafsir Suratul Hummazah:

- Al-Hammaz refers to (slander) by speech

- Al-Lammaz refers to (slander) by action.

This means that the person finds fault with people and belittles them. Allah's statement,
(Hammaz, going about with slander) (68:11)

Ibn `Abbas said, "Humazah Lumazah means one who reviles and disgraces (others).''
Mujahid said, "Al-Humazah is with the hand and the eye, and Al-Lumazah is with the
tongue.''

111:4 [Here the lady used to carry tales to spread mischief among people. Who was this
lady? Umm Jamil bint Harb, the wife of Abu Lahab.

I ask you, these tales were referred to as ‘wood’ – why? The tales would cause
destruction and corruption just as fire wood would do so, if spread – this what spreading
tales does.

“And those who annoy the believing men and women undeservedly, they bear
the crime of slander and plain sin” 33:58

• Hudaifah R.A. reports that Muhammad S.A.W said: “A Nammaam will never enter
Paradise” BUkhari

• Muhammad S.A.W. is also reported to have said: Shall I tell you about the most evil
ones from amongst you? They said: ‘Of course’ He said: ‘Those who go around with
nameemah. They make enmity between friends and they seek problems for the
innocent” Ahmed and Bukhari

• Ibn Abbas (Radhiallahu `Anhu) said: "Allah's Messenger (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa


Sallam) was passing by two graves and said, 'They (the dead laying in these
graves) are being tortured not for a major (sin), but in fact, it is a minor
(sin). One of them used to carry Nameemah and the other didn't save
himself from being soiled by his urine.'" [al-Bukhari & Muslim]

Motives For Slandering

· Ignorance of the prohibition of Nameemah and the gravity of this sin

· To get things off one's chest such as hatred and malice

· Joining, by agreeing with a group of friends, to draw closer to the group

· To hurt or harm the person being discussed

· To show love and loyalty to the person being told


· Joking or fooling around

· Pretending knowledge of people, their secrets and status

N.B. When it comes to a person known to spread tales etc then recall: ““O you who believe! If a
wicked person comes to you with any news, ascertain the truth, lest you harm people
unintentionally and afterwards become full of repentance for what you have done” 49:6

WHAT TO DO?

- Approach the Namaam and advise him, for Allah has said: "Enjoin (people) to Al-
Ma`ruf (good) and forbid (people) from Al-Munkar (evil)." [Qur`an 31:17]
- Dislike the Namaam for the sake of Allah, for Allah does not like the Namaam.
- Do not think ill of your absent brethren, for Allah has said: "O you who believe!
Avoid much suspicion, indeed some suspicions are sins..." [Qur`an 49:12]
- Do not be pushed by what has been said to go and check on others and spy. Allah
said: "... and spy not..." [Qur`an 49:12]
- Do not accept for yourself what you have forbidden the Namaam from doing. Do
not spread his Nameemah. Al-Hasan (Radhiallahu `Anhu) said: "Whoever carries
Nameemah to you, will carry one about you." The Prophet (Sallallahu `Alayhi Wa
Sallam) is reported to have said: "The worst people before Allah on the Day of
Resurrection will be those who, the people leave (undisturbed) to be away from
their evil."
- "The Qaati` will not enter Paradise." They asked, "Who is the Qaati`?" He
said, "The one who severs the bonds among the people." [al-Bukhari & Muslim]

WHAT ARE THE CHARACTERISTICS OF A SLANDERER:

And obey you not everyone Hallaaf Maheen. A slanderer going about with
calumnies, Hinderer of the good, transgressor, sinful, cruel and moreover,
base born." [Qur`an 68:10-13]

Allah has described in these verses, the Namaam, with 9 characteristics, all of which are
ugly:

1. He is Hallaaf: one who swears (vows/attests) much. One who does so is often an
untruthful person who suspects that people do not believe him and thus swears to
cover up his lying and convince others.
2. He is Maheen: worthless
3. He is Hamaaz: a slanderer, who criticizes and insults people, using words or
signals in their presence and absence.
4. He goes about with calumnies: misrepresentations or vilification to harm others
and create enmity.
5. He is an obstacle for good.
6. He is a transgressor for he violates truth and justice
7. He is a sinner for he cares not about committing sins and performing prohibited
acts.
8. He is cruel, harsh, rough and hard.
9. He is Zaneem: base born.
Slander of Ayesha is known as Al-Ifk

Verses are found in Suratun Noor.

What happened in short: Slander and falsehood that was mong the hypocrites who made
their accusations against Ayesha R.A. and spread lies about her.

ْ ُ ‫من ْك‬
[‫م‬ ّ ‫ة‬
ٌ َ ‫صب‬ ِ ْ‫جآُءوا ِبال ِف‬
ْ ُ‫ك ع‬ َ ‫ن‬ ِ ّ ‫ن ال‬
َ ‫ذي‬ ّ ِ ‫]إ‬

“Verily, those who brought forth the slander are a group among you”

• It was a group.

• Foremost among this group was `Abdullah bin Ubayy bin Salul, the leader of the
hypocrites, who fabricated the lie and whispered it to others.

• Eventually some of the Muslims started to believe it, and others thought it might
be possible and began to talk about it.

• This is how matters remained for almost a month, until Qur'an was revealed

The story from Ayesha R.A. as reported in the Sahihain:

A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, the wife of the Prophet , said: "When the
Messenger of Allah wanted to go on a journey, he would cast lots among his wives, and
the one whose lot was drawn would go with him.'' `A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with
her, said, "So he drew lots among us with regard to a campaign he was going out on, and
mine was drawn, so I went out with the Messenger of Allah . This was after the
commandment of Hijab had been revealed, so I traveled in my howdah and stayed in it
when we camped. We traveled until the Messenger of Allah completed his campaign,
then we returned. As we were approaching Al-Madinah, we paused for a while, then they
announced that the journey was to be resumed. When I heard this, I walked quickly away
from the army to answer the call of nature, then I came back to my howdah. Then I put
my hand to my chest and noticed that a necklace of mine that was made of onyx and
cornelian had broken, so I went back and looked for it, and was delayed because of that.
In the meantime, the people who used to lift my howdah onto my camel came along and
put it on the camel, thinking that I was inside. In those times women were more slender
and not so heavy, they only ate mouthfuls of food. So the people did not think anything
of the howdah being so light when they lifted it up, as I was a young woman. They set
off, and I found my necklace after the army had moved on. Then I came back to the
place where we had stopped, and I saw no one to call or answer. So I went to the place
where I had been, thinking that the people would miss me and come back for me. While I
was sitting there, I fell asleep. tSafwan bin Al-Mu`attal As-Sulami Adh-Dhakwani had
rested during the night behind the army. Then he set out just before daybreak and
reached the place where I was in the morning, where he saw the outline of a person
sleeping. He came to me and recognized me when he saw me, as he had seen me before
Hijab was made obligatory for me. When he saw me and said `Truly, to Allah we belong,
and truly, to Him we shall return,' I woke up, and covered my face with my Jilbab (outer
garment). By Allah, he did not speak a word to me and I did not hear him say anything
except `Truly, to Allah we belong, and truly, to Him we shall return,' until he brought his
camel and made it kneel so that I could ride upon it, then he set out leading the camel
until we caught up with the army at Zuhr time.

• What did our Mother of the believers go through?


• She was ill for a month
• People all over started talking about this matter
• She knew nothing about it – yet the talking continued
• While she was ill all the Messenger S.A.W. would say or ask is

ْ ُ ‫ف ِتيك‬
«‫م؟‬ َ ْ ‫»ك َي‬

(How is that (lady))

This is some of what she went through. Due to what? Slander oh ikhwaa…..

In any case, you should read this full story in tafseer Ibn Katheer or from the Sahihain. A
reminder to us all, as mentioned earlier, that when it comes to a Muslims, first you think
good, we must always strive for this, as Allah SWT informs us in the matter pertaining to
the Ifk:

“Why then, did not the believers, men and women, when you heard it [the
slander], think good of their own people and say: ‘This is an obvious lie” verse
12

How is it that in our time this same trick is used? A brother or sister is doing good, and
something out of the ordinary happens with them, and so the cycle of evil thoughts and
slander begins slowly, when we should first think good of Muslims.

• The Messenger (peace be upon him) said: “Keep away from seven dangerous and
destructive sins (and from them is) ... slandering pious women (by accusing them
of adultery)...” [Bukhari & Muslim]
• The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “Whoever accuses what his
right hand possesses of adultery will have the judgment established (against him
for it) on the Day of Judgment, unless it is as he claimed.” [Bukhari & Muslim]
Note: The Sharee‘ah stipulates that, for the accusation of Zinaa (adultery or fornication),
that four mature, male witnesses must testify that they all (together) saw the accused in
the actual act itself (i.e. “as a bucket enters into a well” according to the Prophet (peace
be upon him). If the testimony is not as stipulated above (i.e. they have not seen the
actual act in itself), but have only seen convincing evidences, or there is three or less
witnesses, then their testimonies are rejected. And Allah, the Most High stipulates:
“And those who accuse chaste women, and produce not four witnesses, flog
them with eighty stripes, and reject their testimony forever...” [An-Noor 24:
4]

Another matter on lying:

Allah, the Almighty said: “A painful torment is theirs because they used to be
liars” [Al-Baqarah 2:10]
• Ibn Mas‘oud, may Allah be pleased with him, said that the Messenger of Allah
(peace be upon him) said: “Truth guides to righteousness, and righteousness leads
to Janaah and indeed a person would involve in truth until he is written with Allah
as truthful. And lying guides to immorality which guide to Jahannam, and a person
would lie until he is written with Allah as a liar.” [Bukhari & Muslim]
• From among the characteristic of a hypocrite, described to us by the Prophet
(peace be upon him), is that: “ when he speaks he lies’: [Bukhari & Muslim]
Hypocrites are the worst of people, because of their evil deeds which involve deception.
Consequently, their punishment would be the most severe on the Day of Judgment. So,
brothers and sisters, avoid lying at all cost, so as to save yourselves from being even
considered to be associated with the worst of mankind.
• ‘Aaishah, informing us about the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “If
he (peace be upon him) finds anyone from his family lying, he would turn away
from that person until he/she repents.” [Ahmad and Al-Haakim]

How do you know when they repented?

When is lying allowed?

We are not an ummah that many are portraying these days, with the likes of saying we
uphold such morality that we must obey shirk if we under their rule [Indeed words are
twisted to make them seem acceptable], we are not those who are so moral that when
our women are raped and kids inflicted with diseases from chemical warfare waged upon
them – we, the so called ummah say: “how can you [mujahideen] kill innocence – should
it happen in some effort that a child or lady be killed or even injured or many for that
matter who are amongst the enemy fighting islam and muslims” ………….We have
morality and we have reality:

• The Prophet of Allah (peace be upon him): “I do not consider it lying: A man who
makes peace between other men, a man who speaks in battle, a man speaking to
his wife, or a wife speaking to her husband.” [Abu Dawood]
• It was narrated from Umm Kulthoom bint ‘Uqbah that she heard the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “He is not a liar who
brings about reconciliation among people, conveys good words and says good
things.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2546; Muslim, 2605
• It was narrated that Asma’ bint Yazeed said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Lies are not appropriate except in three
cases: when a man speaks to his wife to please her, telling lies at times of war,
and lying in order to bring about reconciliation between people.” Shaykh al-Albaani
said: it is hasan.

So we take precaution and always know that no muslim wishes harm upon another,
unless permitted by the All Might Allah SWT, even if the democratic rights prohibit it –
our objective is acceptance from Allah SWT.

Think of this – how many times do we think we not lying, yet it’s recorded on our left
scale of deeds?

• ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Aamir said: “The Messenger of Allah came to our house while I was a
boy, so he ‘Abdullaah said: ‘I left to go and play. My mother said ‘Come ‘Abdullaah
for me to give you (something).’ The Messenger (peace be upon him) said: ‘What
will you give to him?’ She said ‘I will give him a date.’ He (Abdullaah) said, that the
Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: ‘If you did not have anything to give
to him, a lie would have been written against you.’” [Abu Dawood & Ahmad]
• The Messenger (peace be upon him) said: “It is enough (to make) a man a liar if he
speak everything he hears.” [Abu Dawood & Al-Haakim]
• The Messenger said: “Woe to him who speak and lie so that he can makes people
laugh - woe to him, woe to him.” [Ahmad, Abu Dawood & others]
• The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “...and whoever directs his
brother in an affair; but knows that the right guidance is other than that, has
deceived him.” [Abu Dawood & Haakim]
• The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “The most evil of people is the
two faced person who come to these with one face and goes to those with
another.” [Abu Dawood]
• He (peace be upon him) also said: “Who is two faced in this world will have two
tongues of fire on the Day of Judgment.” [Abu Dawood]

Herein I would like to highlight something in relation to seeking the truth: The seeker
may come with something today and he goes away and learns something else that is
more correct or a correction of what he previously knew – and so do not fall under the
above hadeeth. The person was upon what he held to be the truth yesterday, then he
continued upon a path seeking knowledge and acquired knowledge that changed his
view, or changed his way, and he is guided to the truth, beig different to what he held, or
additional or similar and so changes – so we gotta be careful – think good of muslims,
and ask so you may know.

In summary:

Instances in which Islam permits lying, is if that serves a greater purpose or wards off a
greater harm

1- When a person is intermediating in order to bring about reconciliation between


two disputing parties.
2- When a man speaks to his wife, or a wife to her husband, concerning matters that
will increase the love between them.

3- War.

Praising People

Firstly lets say that there is a difference between thanking and praising. We are informed
that expressing thanks to creation is also showing thanks to Allah SWT. However praising
others has limits and requirements and manners, while thanking is obviously related to
the matter one is thanking another for, and so hard to go to excess in that.

1. One can praise another to express appreciation for someone or his works
2. Doing so excessively, or flatteringly is disallowed

Some thought on the above 2 points:


[A]
Someone does good to you then say: “JazakAllaahu khairun” there is sufficiency in the
sunnah!
If you want o praise someone then we informed in Sahih muslim 4/2296 to say: “I value
[such and such person] and Allah is His Assesor, it is of no benefit to anyone before Allah
that I value him – if he knew of this”
At the same time we should be aware of expressing of love for brothers and showing
care for the Islamic brotherhood, even above that of blood relations….. do not go to
extremes worrying about praising or not praising, just be balanced.

[B]
If you are praised, the new informed I Bukhari AlAdab Al Mufrad, no. 761 to say: “O Allah,
do not call me to account for what they say and forgive me for what they have no
knowledge of [and make me better than they imagine]”
Abu Bakrah said: “A man was mentioned before the Prophet (peace be upon
him) and another man praised him greatly. The Prophet (peace be upon him)
said: ‘May Allah ‘s Mercy be upon you! You have cut the neck of your friend.’
The Prophet (peace be upon him) repeated this many times and said: ‘If it is
necessary for any of you to praise someone, then he should say: ‘I think! That
he is so and-so’, if he really thinks that he is such. Allah is the One Who will
take his account (as He knows his reality), and none can sanctify anyone
before Allah.’ ” [Bukhari Vol. 8 #87]
• Seven (7) evils are attached to praising people.
• Four (4) to the person who praises another
• Three (3) to the one who is being praised

As for the person who is praising:


(1) One could be excessive in praising, and as such, say untrue things, thus becoming
involved in lying.
(2) One could be praising a person to win his favor, thus doing it for show. Although in so
doing, he outwardly manifests his love for the person, inwardly he does not believe
everything he says. His showing off, therefore, amounts to nothing less than hypocrisy.
(3) He says things that he is not certain about and about, which he is in no position to
truly assess.
(4) Through praises, he could make the praised one feel encouraged, although he might
be an oppressor. This is Haraam in Islam. The oppression of the oppressor must be
stopped, instead of being fostered. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
“Help your bother, if he is oppressor or the oppressed.” It was said: “How
would you help him if he is the oppressor?” He (peace be upon him) said:
“Restrain him from oppression and that would be helping him.” [Ahmad,
Bukhari & Tirmidhi]

As for the person who is being praised:


(1) Praise can cause pride within him. This quality is destructive, if it affects a person.
(2) The praised person could, thereafter, do things in order to acquire praises, instead of
doing them to please Allah Alone.
(3) If he is praised, he might become satisfied with his efforts, and thereafter, reduce his
desire to do good work.

What to do?
• Be free from above evils.
• If so, then praise truthfully acknowledging someone’s good efforts.
• Encourage them upon the good.
• If you being praised, beware of pride, self admiration and complacency.
When people used to praise ‘Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, he used to say: “O
Allah! Forgive me for what they do not know, and do not take me to account
for what they say, and make me better than they think of me.”
Remember that it is not the recognition of people that oe seeks but that of Allah SWT. And in this
also, do not go to extremes, as we do seek our parent’s recognition, yes? And other than that. Be
balanced.
Disputes and arguments

Ibn Abi Lailaa said: “I would not argue with anyone, because I would either cause him to
lie, or I would anger him, because arguing is one form of objection to another person’s
speech with intent to show defect in it, either in the word he uses or the meaning he
implies or with the intention he intends. So, to stop an argument, stop the objections, so
that every word you hear, if it is true, then acknowledge it and if it is vain or lying
speech, or there is no connection with the Deen, then leave it alone by keeping silent.”
The above statement of Ibn Abi Lailaa does not contradict the command to “enjoin good
and forbid evil” since it is difficult to command good and forbid evil while being involved
in an argument.
Allah, the Sublime said: “...And if the foolish address them (with bad words) they
reply with mild words of gentleness...” [Al-Furqoon 25: 63]

“O you who believe! Obey Allah and obey the Messenger (Muhammad ), and
those of you (Muslims) who are in authority. (And) if you differ in anything
amongst yourselves, refer it to Allah and His Messenger (), if you believe in
Allah and in the Last Day. That is better and more suitable for final
determination.” An-Nisaa: 59

What is this referring in our time? It is going back to Qur’an and authentic Sunnah, going
to the Qaadhi who judges by it, going to the aalim who is upon it to judge by it.

The Prohibition to Speak while the Imaam is giving the Khutbah on Friday (Jumu‘ah).

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “Whoever says ‘shut up’ to his brother
while the Imaam is addressing the people (in the Khutbah) on the Day of Juma’ah has
done an evil act. “ [Al-Bukhari]
In this Hadeeth the person who is telling the other to be quiet is actually involved in
“commanding good and forbidding evil”. However, the gravity of speaking during the
Khutbah, while the Imaam is speaking, is so great, that even this noble act cannot be
done.
Abu Ad-Dardaa said: “The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) was on the Minbar,
addressing the people, and he (peace be upon him) recited a particular aayah. Ubay Ibn
Ka’b was sitting next to me, so I asked him: ‘When was that aayah revealed?’ He refused
to speak to me, until the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) came down from the
minbar, and then he said to me: ‘You have nothing from the Friday Prayer but your vain
speech.’ When the Prophet (peace be upon him) had finished, I went to him and
informed him of what has happened, and he (peace be upon him) said: ‘Ubay has
spoken the truth, if you hear the Imaam speaking, be quiet until he is finished.’ ” [Ahmad
& At-Tabaraanie]
So do not engage in any form of communication until the khateeb has completed and
descended the mimbar.

Prohibition to give Respectable Titles to Hypocrites and Innovators.


The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “Do not address a hypocrite by using
respectable titles (like sir, master etc.), for even if he is in such a position, you would
have aroused the anger of your Lord, Master of Honor and Glory.” [Abu Dawood]

The Prohibition to use the Word ‘if’ Relative to Qadr (Allah’s Decree).
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “The strong believer is better and
more loved by Allah than a weak believer, but in each of them is good; aspire after what
is going to benefit you and seek Allah’s help and do not despair, and if anything afflicts
you, then do not say: ‘If I had done so and so, but say Allah’s decree and what He wills,
He will do, because ‘if’ opens the works of Shaitaan.” [Bukhari]
This is after the incident has occurred. However, in discussing an issue about the future,
there is no harm in the use of the word ‘if’ in discussing various approaches. And Allah
knows best.

Conclusion

I think it was Abu Darda that said: “Allah subhana created for you two ears and one
tongue so that what you hear is double what you talk".

Umar Bin A’bd Al-Aziz once said: “whoever knows and realize that his words, he utters,
are part of his deeds, He, surely will speak only with what concerns him”

We will inshaAllah look at the matters takfir, spying and other than that next week.

Some quotes for your benefit:

· A man from the Salaf visited his brother. His brother conveyed Nameemah to him about
a friend of his, so he told his brother: "My brother, you have made a long Gheebah and
caused me three offences: made my brother disliked to me; made my heart think about
what you said; and made me suspect your honesty."

· A Namaam sent a letter to As-Saahib Bin `Abbad encouraging him to take some of the
money from an orphan because it was too much. As-Saahib wrote back on the back of
the letter: "Nameemah is ugly and evil when it is true. If you meant to advise me by
writing to me, then be assured that your loss is better than the profit. I ask Allah for
refuge from accepting a tale from a dishonoured person about another with a blameless
record. If you were not in your old age, we would have treated you with your intention.
So avoid the same, for Allah knows the hidden and unseen. May Allah cover the dead
with His mercy and support the orphan with patience. The money is increased and
blessed by Allah, and the conveyer of Nameemah is cursed by Allah."
· Bakr Bin `Abdullah is reported to have said: "Always do something where if you do it
and you're right then you will be rewarded and if you are wrong, you will not be
punished. And avoid doing something where if you are right, you will not be rewarded
and if you are wrong, you will be punished." They asked: "What is that thing?" He
said: "Ill suspicions of people; if you are right, you will not be rewarded; but if you are
wrong, you are sinners."

· Muhammad Bin Ka`b was asked what qualities are low and not fitting for a believer. He
said: "Talking too much, uncovering the secret and accepting the sayings of everyone."

· A man said to `Amr Bin `Ubaid, "A man has been saying bad things about you." `Amr
said to him: "Listen! You have not honoured the sitting in this man's company because
you conveyed to me his speech. Further, you did not consider brotherly rights when you
informed me what I dislike about my brother. But inform him that we all are dying. The
grave will surround us all and the Day of Resurrection will collect all of us and Allah will
judge amongst us; He is the best of judges."

· It was narrated that a person once came to `Omar Bin `Abdul-Aziz (Radhiallahu `Anhu)
and mentioned something about another man. `Omar is reported to have said: "If you
wish, we will look into your claim. If you are lying then you are among the people
mentioned in this Verse: '... If a Fasiq person comes to you with news, verify
it...' [Qur`an 49:6] If you are telling the truth then you are among the people mentioned
in this Verse: 'A slanderer, going about with calumnies.' [Qur`an 68:11] But if you
wish, we would forgive you." The man then said: "I want to be pardoned O Chief of
theBelievers. I promise I will not do such a thing again."

· Luqman said to his son: "My son, I admonish you with qualities that if you hold to, you
will always be honoured as the head of your people: Be good (have good manners) with
the near and far; do not lose your temper with the respected people; protect your
brothers and their honour; and join your kin. Have your brothers and relatives trust
about you that you would not accept any tales from any person who intends to deceive
you and corrupt the relationships. Take friends in a way that if you leave them, you will
not say bad about them, neither will they say bad about you." Some Salaf have said that
Nameemah is based on Kidhb (lying), Hasad (envy) and Nifaaq (hypocrisy). These three
are the pillars of lowliness and depravity.

· A man came to Sulaiman Bin Abdul-Malik and Sulaiman reportedly said to him: "I was
told that you have said bad things about me." The man said, "I have not done or said
anything." Sulaiman then said, "The one who told me is truthful." Upon that Az-Zuhari,
who was in the company of Sulaiman, said, "The Namaam is never truthful." Sulaiman
then said, "You are right." And then he said to the man, "Go in peace."

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