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Three Aspects Professional Success

S.Gopakumar Head,Computer Division, VSSC Chairman, Student activities, IEEE Kerala Section

Time management Behaviour and Communication Team work

Time management
Time is money Organize your time

The Art of Communication

How we learn
83% through sight 11% through hearing 3.5% through smell 1.5% through touch 1% through taste

How we retain information


10% of what we read 20% of what we hear 30% of what we see 50% of what we see and hear 70% of what we say as we talk 90% of what we say as we do a thing

Some Legends
Abraham Lincoln Winston Churchill Mother Teresa

Four ways of Communication


What we do How we look What we say How we say

The Unspoken Language


We smile in pleasure We wink to imply intimacy We scowl in disgust We stand tall in confidence We cower in fear We point in accusation We slump in frustration We nod in approval We shake our heads in consternation We raise our eyebrows in disbelief We frown in disapproval

Facial expression
A smile is contagious. Be a carrier Learn the language of the eyes Look people in the eye Wear success on your face

Body language
Face others directly Good posture exudes good self esteem Develop a winning handshake

Appearance
You never get a second chance to make a first impression Clothing always communicates Overdressing is better than under dressing Accept what you cant change

Valuing others
Develop a genuine interest in others Remember peoples names Respond to messages quickly Make what matters to that person matter to you

Listening
Communication is not a monologue, but a dialogue Listening is not passive its active Remember to pause, look and respond

Conversation
Choose your words carefully Develop a strong vocabulary Speak the other persons language by asking questions Discover the power of laughter Learn to articulate well Protect the other persons dignity
Be assertive Be self aware Criticism

Authenticity

constructive criticism has it s place When you stick your head above the crowd, you can expect a few tomatoes thrown your way Jean Paul Getty

Passive, Assertive, and Aggressive Behaviors


Passive speakers use self-limiting qualifying expressions without stating their position/needs. Assertive speakers state their position/needs without violating the rights of others. Aggressive speakers state their position/needs while violating the rights of others using you messages and absolutes. Passive-aggressive speakers may switch back and forth, may switch immediately after the situation, or may build hostility while behaving passively.

Problem solving Encouragement Self talk

Transactional Analysis (I)


Transactional analysis (TA): a method of understanding behavior in interpersonal dynamics.

The three ego states


Parent
Critical parent Sympathetic parent

Child
Natural child Adapted child

Adult

The three types of transactions


Complementary Crossed Ulterior

Transactional Analysis (II)


Complementary transaction
Supervisor A
C P P A Employee C

P A Supervisor C

P A Employee C

Transactional Analysis (III)


Crossed transaction
Supervisor A
C P P

Transactional Analysis (IV)


Ulterior transaction
P P A Employee C

Employee A
C

Supervisor A
C

P A Supervisor C

P A Employee C

P A Supervisor C

P A Employee C

Life Positions
Attitude toward Oneself
Positive

Im OK Youre not OK Im not OK Youre not OK


Positive

Im OK Youre OK Im not OK Youre OK


Negative

Managing self

Negative

Attitude toward Others

Once upon a time there was a boy with a very difficult character. His father gives him a bag full of nails and tells him to drive one nail in the garden fence every time he loses his patience and/or has an argument with someone.

The first day the boy drives 37 nails in the garden fence. In the following weeks, the boy learns to control himself and the number of nails driven in the fence gets lower every day: The boy discovers that it is easier to learn to control himself than to hammer nails in the fence.

At last, the day comes when the boy does not drive any nail in the garden fence. Then he goes to his father and tells him that today he did not need to hammer any nail.

His father then tells the boy to take out one nail from the fence for every day he succeeds in controlling his temper and not loosing his patience. Many days pass and finally the boy can tell his father that he took out all nails from the fence.

It will never be the same. When you have an argument with someone and tell him bad words, you leave him with wounds like these ones.

The father brings his son in front of the fence and tells him: My son, you behaved well, but look how many holes you left in the fence

You can stab a man and then take the knife out, but you will always leave a wound. It does not matter how many times you say sorry, the wound will stay. A wound caused by words hurts just as bad as a physical wound. Friends are rare jewels, they make you smile and support you. They are ready to listen to you whenever you need it, they are behind you and they open their heart to you. Show to your friends how much you love them.

Give people more than they expect

When you say I love you", mean it...

when you say I am sorrry", look into the eyes of that person

Do not offend and judge other people according to how their relatives behave

Do not ever make fun of other peoples dreams, love deeply and with passion. You may get hurt, but it is the only way to live your life to the full.

Speak slowly, but think quickly.

If someone ask you a question that you do not want to answer, smile and ask him: why do you want to know?'

Remember that the greatest love and the greatest success involve the greater risks.

When you loose, do not miss the lesson,

Remember the three "Rs": - Respect yourself - Respect others - Responsability for all your actions.

Do not let a small misunderstanding ruin a great friendship; when you realise you made a mistake, correct it immediately.

Smile when you answer the phone, who calls will be able to hear it in your voice.

Remember that sometimes not getting what you want may be quite fortunate.

Communications

Welcome to the era of ... COMMUNICATIONS WITHOUT LIMITS!!

Hello Bob?

Did you review the contract I sent you?

rrring

-... So its finished? Youll send it to me by e-mail?

- Just a minute, let me check.

- My e-mail address? Frankly, I dont remember it !!!

-NICOOOLE, ... WHATS MY E-MAIL ADDRESS?

- No, no, thats my home e-mail address!

- Oh!... Youre going for lunch...

- Listen, I cant find it. Let me check and call you back.

OK, Ill send you the address by fax. Youll have it when you get back. OK?

OK. So give me your fax number.

- OK, heres what well do. You e-mail me your fax number and Ill fax you my e-mail address.

- What! You dont know it?

- No, that wont work. Wait, Im getting mixed up... Let me think...

- Whats your cell-phone number? So Hum OK Well Yeah

- Oh, your battery is dead ... Mine too...

- OK, listen, heres what well do...

- Then you take my e-mail address in your voice mail and you e-mail me your fax number.

- You charge your cell-phone battery, Ill call you in a couple of hours and leave you my e-mail address in your voice mail.

-Then I can fax you my e-mail address.

- Thats plan A. Now for plan B!

when you get it, you send me the answer on my pager...

I send myself an e-mail to see what my e-mail address is and then I record a message for you in my voice mail....

so then, I send you a fax with my e-mail address.

- Complicated? No, its not at all complicated.

-Theres also a third possibility thats much simpler: plan C... You send me the contract directly by express messenger.

-We just need a bit of coordination... and luck...

-Yeah!... Its the best plan strategically speaking...

- But actually, I have a small question...

- Oh! You dont remember either.

what was I supposed to send you by e-mail? My e-mail address, my fax number, my cell number, pager, telephone?

- It would probably be a good idea to have periodic bilateral coordination meetings concerning protocols for internal communications.

- But anyway, since your office is at the other end of the corridor, Ill come by to pick it up in 2 minutes... OK? Bye!

And the moral: Thanks to technology, we can now waste time with an efficiency until now unimaginable, all in the name of saving time

Team work

Hare and Tortoise story

Once upon a time a tortoise and a hare had an argument about who was faster. They decided to settle the argument with a race. They agreed on a route and started off the race. The hare shot ahead and ran briskly for some time. Then seeing that he was far ahead of the tortoise, he thought he'd sit under a tree for some time and relax before continuing the race.

He sat under the tree and soon fell asleep. The tortoise plodding on overtook him and soon finished the race, emerging as the undisputed champ. The hare woke up and realized that he'd lost the race. The moral of the story is that slow and steady wins the race.

The hare woke up and realized that he'd lost the race. The moral of the story is that slow and steady wins the race. This is the version of the story that we've all grown up with.

But then recently, someone told me a more interesting version of this story. It continues.

Level 2
The hare was disappointed at losing the race and he did some Defect Prevention (Root Cause Analysis). He realized that he'd lost the race only because he had been overconfident, careless and lax.

If he had not taken things for granted, there's no way the tortoise could have beaten him. So he challenged the tortoise to another race. The tortoise agreed. This time, the hare went all out and ran without stopping from start to finish. He won by several miles.

The moral of the story Fast and consistent will always beat the slow and steady. If you have two people in your organization, one slow, methodical and reliable, and the other fast and still reliable at what he does, the fast and reliable chap will consistently climb the organizational ladder faster than the slow, methodical chap.

It's good to be slow and steady; but it's better to be fast and reliable.

Level 3
But the story doesn't end here. The tortoise did some thinking this time, and realized that there's no way he can beat the hare in a race the way it was currently formatted.

He thought for a while, and then challenged the hare to another race, but on a slightly different route. The hare agreed. They started off. In keeping with his self-made commitment to be consistently fast, the hare took off and ran at top speed until he came to a broad river.

The finishing line was a couple of kilometers on the other side of the river. The hare sat there wondering what to do. In the meantime the tortoise trundled along, got into the river, swam to the opposite bank, continued walking and finished the race.

The moral of the story? First identify your core competency and then change the playing field to suit your core competency.

In an organization, if you are a good speaker, make sure you create opportunities to give presentations that enable the senior management to notice you. If your strength is analysis, make sure you do some sort of research, make a report and send it upstairs. Working to your strengths will not only get you noticed but will also create opportunities for growth and advancement.

If your strength is analysis, make sure you do some sort of research, make a report and send it upstairs. Working to your strengths will not only get you noticed but will also create opportunities for growth and advancement.

The story still hasn't ended.


Level 4 The hare and the tortoise, by this time, had become pretty good friends and they did some thinking together. Both realized that the last race could have been run much better.

They started off, and this time the hare carried the tortoise till the riverbank. There, the tortoise took over and swam across with the hare on his back. On the opposite bank, the hare again carried the tortoise and they reached the finishing line together. They both felt a greater sense of satisfaction than they'd felt earlier.

So they decided to do the last race again, but to run as a team this time.

The moral of the story? It's good to be individually brilliant and to have strong core competencies; but unless you're able to work in a team and harness each other's core competencies, you'll always perform below par because there will always be situations at which you'll do poorly and someone else does well.

Teamwork is mainly about situational leadership, letting the person with the relevant core competency for a situation take leadership. There are more lessons to be learnt from this story.

Note that neither the hare nor the tortoise gave up after failures. The hare decided to work harder and put in more effort after his failure. The tortoise changed his strategy because he was already working as hard as he could. In life, when faced with failure, sometimes it is appropriate to work harder and put in more effort.

Sometimes it is appropriate to change strategy and try something different. And sometimes it is appropriate to do both. The hare and the tortoise also learnt another vital lesson. When we stop competing against a rival and instead start competing against the situation, we perform far better.

When Roberto Goizueta took over as CEO of Coca-Cola in the 1980s, he was faced with intense competition from Pepsi that was eating into Coke's growth. His executives were Pepsi-focused and intent on increasing market share 0.1 per cent a time.

Goizueta decided to stop competing against Pepsi and instead compete against the situation of 0.1 per cent growth. He asked his executives what was the average fluid intake of an American per day? The answer was 14 ounces. What was Coke's share of that? Two ounces. Goizueta said Coke needed a larger share of that market.

The competition wasn't Pepsi. It was the water, tea, coffee, milk and fruit juices that went into the remaining 12 ounces. The public should reach for a Coke whenever they felt like drinking something. To this end, Coke put up vending machines at every street corner. Sales took a quantum jump and Pepsi has never quite caught up since.

To sum up, the story of the hare and tortoise teaches us many things. Chief among them are that fast and consistent will always beat slow and steady; work to your competencies; pooling resources and working as a team will always beat individual performers; never give up when faced with failure; and finally, compete against the situation. Not against a rival.

Flight of Geese

If between friends and partners we were geese... geese... Ah!

The next season, when you see the geese migrating, going to a warmer place, to sort the winter... Pay attention that they fly in a V formation Maybe you will be interested in knowing Why they do it this way...

By flying in a V formation....

The whole flock increases the flight efficiency by 71% Compared to just one bird flying alone

Lesson 1: Sharing the same direction and working as a team, get us to the destination quicker and easier. By helping ourselves, the accomplishments are greater!.

When a goose leaves the formation..

He feels the resistance of the air and the difficulties of flying alone....

Lesson 2: Then, he quickly comes back to the formation to take advantage of the the flocks power in front of him .. By staying in tune and united beside those who are going in the same direction, the effort will be less. It will be easier and pleasing to reach the goals, Everyone will be inclined to accept and give help.

When the leader goose gets tired of flying...

... He goes to the end of the V formation. While another goose takes the lead.

Lesson 3: To share the leadership, There must be mutual respect between us all the time... Sharing the hardest problems and tasks.. Gathering our abilities and combining our faculties, talents and resources. The geese flying on a V formation, they quack to encourage to the ones in the front.

In that way, they keep the same speed.

Lesson 4: When there is courage and encouragement, the progress is greater.. A timely word of encouragement, always motivates, helps and strengthens.. It produces the best of benefits...

When a goose gets sick, is injured or gets tired ,

Other geese leave the formation too, and they fly with him to help him out and protect him. They remain with him until he dies or he is able to fly again. They reach their bevy or they just make another V formation. And he must leave the formation...

Lesson 5: Lets stay beside each other no matter what the differences. Specially in times of difficulty and great challenges..

If we bond together and support each other.. If we make true the spirit of teamwork.. Regardless of our differences, we can rise to meet our challenge. If we understand the real value of friendship.. If we are aware of the feeling of sharing.. LIFE WILL BE EASIER AND THE PASSING OF YEARS MORE FULFILLING ..

References:
Les Giblin Skill with People Les Giblin The Art of Dealing with People Terry Felber Am I making myself clear? Im OK youre OK Thomas Harris Greg S Reid The Millionaire Mentor Dale Carnegie How to win Friends & Influence People

MY FRIENDS AND PARTNERS... LETS BE LIKE THE GEESE!!!

Thank you
Email: s.gopakumar@ieee.org

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