Dietel-McLaughlin / FYC 13300 / Fall 2011

Visual Essay Proposal

(Paper copy due in class 11/22; Worth 5 points out of your nal total point total for the Visual Essay) Your Name(s)

Michael Nolan
Primary Goal/Point of the Piece:

To study underage marriage and relationships and support the voices of children.

Format/Medium Your Essay Will Take:

Video Essay with photos, text, and music incorporated.

Main points/sections that will support your main purpose: 1) Arranged marriages as parts of other cultures, to show that childhood marriage exists Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point: Case studies from third-world cultures, or even states/cultures in the US 2)
Romeo and Juliet laws protect lovers from statutory rape

Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point: Romeo + Juliet clips, trial footage? 3)
Underage marriage laws require court action that makes these marriages resemble trials of criminal acts. These are two very opposite acts that should not resemble each other. Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point: Law examples, trial case studies, visual demonstration (skit) of what is necessary for marriages 4)
There are health benets that stem from young relationships: they build identity, they develop interpersonal skills, and relationships at this age change societal opinions for the better.

Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point: Representing the facts through children and teenagers speaking, like a documentary Some claims/perspectives that might complicate your perspective: 1)
The brain is not fully developed until the mid-20s, the frontal lobe is especially underdeveloped (makes exeutive decisions) Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point:
MRI scans to display brain locations, statistics about mid-20s marriages, what causes adults to fall in love: amygdala or frontal lobe?

2)
Children are too young and inexperienced to understand romance or sex, so they cannot doubtlessly engage in a relationship or give sexual consent. Visual/textual evidence to illustrate this point: Children are tried in court as adults for many reasons, and if, judicially, they can be viewed as adults and are wise and knowledgeable to stand on trial as one, then they can take part in everything adults can without interference. SVU episode? Opinion montage? Library source material to integrate (use credible sources): 1)
State laws, found in copies of the states constitutions.

Where/how do you plan to use it? Ill use it as evidence to support my Main Point #3, resembling the judicial proceedings these laws entail to criminal proceedings. 2) The Human Frontal Lobes edited by Bruce L. Miller and Jeffrey L. Cummings; chapter 35 details Frontal Lobe Development in Children Where/how do you plan to use it? Regarding the counterarguments: Ill detail the biological aspect of childrens supposed lack of decision-making skills 3) Adolescent Romantic Relationships by Sarah Sorenson, an article from the ACT developed by Cornell Univ., Univ. Of Rochester, and other credible organizations. Where/how do you plan to use it? Ill use it mostly in support of Point #4, but it could help with Point #2. Ill present the facts of this article through the voices of adolescents.

Exploratory Draft
In this visual essay, I plan to explore the popular beliefs surrounding adolescent and teenage relationships and marriage, looking at the social, judicial, and biological (psychological) aspects of the topic. Ill comment on the many opinions against young relationships and explain how I believe they are unfounded, arguing that kids are no less capable of maintaining healthy relationships than adults are. This topic is interesting to me because I was always concerned that relationships at my age would always be unhealthy and short-lived, but, since I was proven otherwise through experience, I wish to explain through this essay why that outlook on young romance is ill-founded. This is a popular topic that many take a position on, yet it is not a concerning-enough topic for there to be deep explanations of or extravagant studies on. With this essay, I will present my research on the popular opinions of underage relationships and marriage to expose how there is no foundation for the beliefs that condemn these relationships and marriages.
I believe this essay could be directed at either adults who hold traditional beliefs about the sanctity and exclusivity of relationships and marriage or at adolescents and teenagers like myself. I do not wish to choose between these two groups when I develop this essay, for I feel this essay could be very benecial in both groups. It would be lacking persuasion if it were so focused on merely one group. Although I will be speaking from a teenagers point of view, I will include research and factual, textbook evidence to gain credibility among my targeted, adult audience. To appeal to the younger crowd, I will be blunt and up-to-date with my observations, incorporating some of my own experiences and even experiences of my friends. To appeal to the adult crowd, I will develop factual points that incorporate information about the judicial aspect of teen marriage and relationships, as well as biological/psychological research regarding the developmental stages of adolescents and teens, especially regarding decision-making and logic. If I can balance these audiences correctly, I feel that will add persuasion to my essay with both audiences, for each audience will appreciate how encompassing this essay would be.
I will mostly present this essay as an amalgamation of video recordings of my friends presenting the facts and opinions I develop. I feel like this is the most persuasive method, for we are all teenagers ourselves. If we all present the research and facts, that will demonstrate a collective understanding of the issues regarding underage relationships and marriage among my age group, for the main opinion adults and traditional thinkers present regarding this topic is the lack of understanding among my age group. I gained inspiration from the anti-homophobia videos presented by the organization, FCKH81, which bluntly presents facts and opinions by both straight and gay people about the
1

http://fckh8.com/BornThisWay/

popular issues regarding homosexuality, and I nd these videos very persuasive. The quickness of the videos have an aggressive feel that I nd persuasive, and having both straight and gay people present the facts and opinions convinces me that those facts and opinions are widely accepted. I will use the same techniques to structure my video.
I will use alphabetic text sparsely, for that would be less persuasive than presenting my text through the voices of adolescents and teenagers. However, I will use alphabetic text to elaborate upon factual/statistical evidence I may nd, for providing both visual and auditory stimuli in my video will generate a more lasting impression on my viewers. Ill present this alphabetic text mostly by overlapping the text onto a video of my teenage friends vocally presenting the text. All of these facts will be evidence from my source material, and I will cite the sources either as a footnote within the same frame that I present the evidence or in a works cited-type frame at the very end of the video.
One of my concerns would be tting all of the information and ideas I expressed in the proposal into a video less than ve minutes long. I know I will have to shorten it, but I also understand that one can speak information very quickly and have it still be understandable to their listeners. I also feel like I will have to make my thesis more concise, for my main points do appear to be pretty different from each other. While developing my video, I know I will run into problems with whatever software I use, for it has happened to me in the past. I will use iMovie in combination with Keynote (the Macintosh version of PowerPoint, which can export slideshows as videos to use in iMovie), but I have been frustrated with both applications before. To counteract this, I will start on developing my video early so that I have time to work out any issues that arise. Im also unsure as to what balance between facts and opinions I should use based on the essay requirements, so Ill be sure to discuss that with you, Dr. E. Im excited to get to work, for I really have a lot to say through this essay, and it sounds fun!