Body Language

Body language is an important part of communication which can constitute 50% or more of what we are communicating. If you wish to communicate well, then it makes sense to understand how you can (and cannot) use your body to say what you mean.

Message clusters
Body language comes in clusters of signals and postures, depending on the internal emotions and mental states. Recognizing a whole cluster is thus far more reliable than trying to interpret individual elements. y y y y y y y y y y y y y y y y y Aggressive body language: Showing physical threat. Attentive body language: Showing real interest. Bored body language: Just not being interested. Closed body language: Many reasons are closed. Deceptive body language: Seeking to cover up lying or other deception. Defensive body language: Protecting self from attack. Dominant body language: Dominating others. Emotional body language: Identifying feelings. Evaluating body language: Judging and deciding about something. Greeting body language: Meeting rituals. Open body language: Many reasons for being open. Power body language: Demonstrating one's power. Ready body language: Wanting to act and waiting for the trigger. Relaxed body language: Comfortable and unstressed. Romantic body language: Showing attraction to others. Sales Body Language: Using your body to sell. Submissive body language: Showing you are prepared to give in.

Core patterns
A number of core patterns can be identified that include clusters of body movements: y Crossing, Expanding, Moving away, Moving forward, Opening, Preening, Repeating, Shaping, Striking and Touching

Parts-of-the-body language
You can send signals with individual parts of the body as well as in concert. Here's details of the contributions of each part of the body. y y y y Head: Face, Cheek, Chin, Mouth, Lips, Teeth, Tongue, Nose, Eyes, Eyebrow, Forehea d, Hair Arm: Elbow, Hand, Finger Torso: Neck, Shoulder, Chest, Back, Belly, Bottom, Hips Legs: Thigh, Knee, Foot

Other notes

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Body Language
Remember that body language varies greatly with people and especially with international cultures (so be very careful when applying Western understanding to Eastern non-verbal language). y y y y y y y y Body as Cue, Evidence, Persuasion: How we shape changes how we feel. Body language caveat: You can't control all of your muscles. So why bother? Emphasis with body language: Adding emphasis to what you are saying. Social distances: The space between us. Satir's Five Positions: Speaking positions. Touching: Using physical touch. Hugging: Close comfort and affection. The face has around 90 muscles in it, with about 30 of these purely for expressing emotion. It can thus be used to send many non-verbal signals, using its various features in concert.

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Color
Red A generally red face may indicate that the person is hot as the blood come to the to surface to be cooled. They may heat up either from exercise or emotional arousal, for example when they are excited and energized. A red face is typical of a person who is angry. This is a clear danger signal, warning the other person that they may be harmed if they do not back down. People blush with embarrassment in various ways. Some people's neck goes red. With others it is mostly the cheeks. Sometimes the whole face goes red. White White skin may be a sign of coldness as the blood goes deep to avoid cooling further. White skin is also an indication of fear, often extreme. This happens as the blood abandons a surface that might be cut, going to muscles where its power is needed more. Blue The skin can also take on a bluish tinge. This can also indicate coldness or extreme fear.

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Moisture
Sweating is the body's natural cooling mechanism when it gets hot, possibly from excitement and emotional arousal. Sweat is also associated with fear, perhaps to make the skin slippery and hence prevent an opponent from taking a firm grasp.

Emotions
Here are some of the facial signals that you might see for different emotions. Do note that these are only possible indicators: not all signals are needed and not all signals indicated here necessarily indicate the associated emotion.

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Body Language
Emotion Facial signals Eyes damp; eyebrows slightly pushed together; trembling lower lip; chin possibly wrinkled; headslightly tilted down. Eyes wide, closed or pointing down; raised eyebrows; mouth open or corners turned down; chinpulled in; head down, white face. Eyes wide and staring; eyebrows pulled down (especially in middle); wrinkled forehead; flarednostrils; mouth flattened or clenched teeth bared; jutting chin, red face. Mouth smiling (open or closed); possible laughter; crows-feet wrinkles at sides of sparklingeyes; slightly raised eyebrows; head level. Eyes cast down and possibly damp or tearful; head down; lips pinched; head down or to the side. Eyes staring; mouth corners turned down; nose turned in sneer; chin jutting. Eyes wide open with dilated pupils; slightly raised eyebrows; lips slightly parted or puckered or smiling; head tilted forward. Steady gaze of eyes at item of interest (may be squinting); slightly raised eyebrows; lipsslightly pressed together; head erect or pushed forward. Eyes looking away; face generally immobile; corners of mouth turned down or lips pulled to the side; head propped up with hand. Eyes wide open; eyebrows raised high; mouth dropped wide open with consequent loweredchin; head held back or tilted to side. Eyebrows tilted outwards (lowered outer edges); mouth either tilted down or smiling; headtilted.

Anxiety

Fear

Anger

Happiness

Sadness

Envy

Desire

Interest

Boredom

Surprise

Relief

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Body Language
Disgust Eyes and head turned away; nostrils flared; nose twisted in sneer; mouth closed, possibly withtongue protruding; chin jutting. Eyes and head turned down; eyebrows held low; skin blushing red. Eyes in extended gaze and possibly damp; eyebrows slightly pulled together in middle or downwards at edges; mouth turned down at corners; head tilted to side. Relaxed facial muscles and steady gaze with eyes. Perhaps mouth turned up slightly at sides in gentle smile.

Shame

Pity

Calm

With careful observation, emotions may be detected from non-verbal signs. Remember that these are indicators and not certain guarantees. Contextual clues may also be used, in particular what is being said to the person or what else is happening around then. Anger Anger occurs when achievement of goals are frustrated. y y y y y y Neck and/or face is red or flushed. Baring of teeth and snarling. Clenched fists. Leaning forward and invasion of body space. Other aggressive body language. Use of power body language.

Fear, anxiety and nervousness Fear occurs when basic needs are threatened. There are many levels of fear, from mild anxiety to blind terror. The many bodily changes caused by fear make it easy to detect. y y y y y y y y y y y y A 'cold sweat'. Pale face. Dry mouth, which may be indicated by licking lips, drinking water, rubbing throat. Not looking at the other person. Damp eyes. Trembling lip. Varying speech tone. Speech errors. Voice tremors. Visible high pulse (noticeable on the neck or movement of crossed leg. Sweating. Tension in muscles: clenched hands or arms, elbows drawn in to the side, jerky movements, legs wrapped around things.

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Body Language
y y y y y Gasping and holding breath. Fidgeting. Defensive body language, including crossed arms and legs and generally drawing in of limbs. Ready body language (for fight-or-flight) Other symptoms of stress

Sadness Sadness is the opposite of happiness and indicates a depressive state. y y y y Drooping of the body. Trembling lip. Flat speech tone. Tears.

Embarrassment Embarrassment may be caused by guilt or transgression of values. y y y Neck and/ or face is red or flushed. Looking down or away from others. Not looking them in the eye. Grimacing, false smile, changing the topic or otherwise trying to cover up the embarrassment.

Surprise Surprise occurs when things occur that were not expected. y y y y Raised eyebrows. Widening of eyes. Open mouth. Sudden backward movement.

Happiness Happiness occurs when goals and needs are met. y y y General relaxation of muscles. Smiling (including eyes). Open body language

A significant cluster of body movements are all about being open. This is sometimes misinterpreted solely as indicating being relaxed and untense. Remember that perhaps the most significant part of being open or close is the act of opening or closing. When you open or close, you are signaling a change in the way you are thinking or feeling, which is likely to be in response to what the other person has said or done.

Language of openness
The open stance has arms and legs not crossed in any way. They may also be moving in various ways.

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Body Language
Arms open Arms are not crossed and may be animated and moving in synchronization with what is being said or held wide. Palms are also relaxed and may be quite expressive, for example appearing to hold things and form more detailed shapes. Open hands show that nothing is being concealed. Legs open Open legs are not crossed. Often they are parallel. They may even be stretched apart. The feet are of interest in open legs and may point forward or to the side or at something or someone of interest. Looking around and at the other person The head may be directed solely towards the other person or may be looking around. Eye contact is likely to be relaxed and prolonged. Relaxed clothing Clothing is likely to hang loosely and actions to loosen clothing may take place, such as removing a jacket and unbuttoning a collar.

Reasons for opening

There can be several reasons for open body language. In particular look for the transition when the body opens and the triggers that may have caused this change. Accepting When arms rounded and palms are sideways, the person may be offering a 'mock hug', showing that they care for the other person. Gestures may be slower and symbolize gentleness. Passive threat An open posture may also be associated with a passive threat. When the person casually 'exposes themself', for example by opening their body and looking away they are opening themselves for attack. When this is relaxed, it may be saying 'I am so powerful and you are so weak, you are unable to attack me even when I am exposed.' Males with knees apart are also doing a crotch display, which, as well as casually exposing vulnerabilities is effectively says to other males 'Look: I have a large penis than you!' Aggression When there is tension in the open body, especially if fists are clenched, then this may be a sign of significant aggression. The person is effectively holding their body open in readiness for a fight. Aggression is also seen when the body is square on to the other person and is relatively close to them. Movements may be particularly sudden and designed to test the other person's reactions. Supplicating When palms are held upwards, this may form a pleading gesture and may be combined with lowering of the body. This is saying 'Please don't hurt me'. Opening the body in supplication is also saying 'Here, you can hurt me if you wish' and is equivalent to a dog who rolls over on its back and exposes itself to indicate that it is not a threat. Relaxing And finally, the open body may simply be the body at rest, relaxed and comfortable.

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