Sometimes the warnings are seen in hindsight.

Before 15-year-old Amanda Cummings committed suicide by jumping in front of a bus near her Staten Island home on Dec. 27, her Facebook updates may have revealed her anguish. On Dec. 1, she wrote: then ill go kill myself, with these pills, this knife, this life has already done half the job. NY TIMES

Bullying as True Drama

By DANAH BOYD and ALICE MARWICK Published: September 22, 2011

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THE suicide of Jamey Rodemeyer, the 14-year-old boy from western New York who killed himself last Sunday after being tormented by his classmates for being gay, is appalling. His story is a classic case of bullying: he was aggressively and repeatedly victimized. Horrific episodes like this have sparked conversations about cyberbullying and created immense pressure on regulators and educators to do something, anything, to make it stop. Yet in the rush to find a solution, adults are failing to recognize how their conversations about bullying are often misaligned with youth narratives. Adults need to start paying attention to the language of youth if they want antibullying interventions to succeed. Jamey recognized that he was being bullied and asked explicitly for help, but this is not always the case. Many teenagers who are bullied cant emotionally afford to identify as victims, and young people who bully others rarely see themselves as perpetrators. For a teenager to recognize herself or himself in the adult language of bullying carries social and psychological costs. It requires acknowledging oneself as either powerless or abusive. In our research over a number of years, we have interviewed and observed teenagers across the United States. Given the public interest in cyberbullying, we asked young people about it, only to be continually rebuffed. Teenagers repeatedly told us that bullying was something that happened only in elementary or middle school. Theres no bullying at this school was a regular refrain.

This didnt mesh with our observations, so we struggled to understand the disconnect. While teenagers denounced bullying, they especially girls would describe a host of interpersonal conflicts playing out in their lives as drama. At first, we thought drama was simply an umbrella term, referring to varying forms of bullying, joking around, minor skirmishes between friends, breakups and makeups, and gossip. We thought teenagers viewed bullying as a form of drama. But we realized the two are quite distinct. Drama was not a show for us, but rather a protective mechanism for them. Teenagers say drama when they want to diminish the importance of something. Repeatedly, teenagers would refer to something as just stupid drama, something girls do, or so high school. We learned that drama can be fun and entertaining; it can be serious or totally ridiculous; it can be a way to get attention or feel validated. But mostly we learned that young people use the term drama because it is empowering. Dismissing a conflict thats really hurting their feelings as drama lets teenagers demonstrate that they dont care about such petty concerns. They can save face while feeling superior to those tormenting them by dismissing them as desperate for attention. Or, if theyre the instigators, the word drama lets teenagers feel that theyre participating in something innocuous or even funny, rather than having to admit that theyve hurt someones feelings. Drama allows them to distance themselves from painful situations. Adults want to help teenagers recognize the hurt that is taking place, which often means owning up to victimhood. But this can have serious consequences. To recognize oneself as a victim or perpetrator requires serious emotional, psychological and social support, an infrastructure unavailable to many teenagers. And when teenagers like Jamey do ask for help, theyre often let down. Not only are many adults ill-equipped to help teenagers do the psychological work necessary, but teenagers social position often requires them to continue facing the same social scene day after day. Like Jamey, there are young people who identify as victims of bullying. But many youths engaged in practices that adults label bullying do not name them as such. Teenagers want to see themselves as in control of their own lives; their reputations are important. Admitting that theyre being bullied, or worse, that they are bullies, slots them into a narrative thats disempowering and makes them feel weak and childish. Antibullying efforts cannot be successful if they make teenagers feel victimized without providing them the support to go from a position of victimization to one of empowerment. When teenagers acknowledge that theyre being bullied, adults need to provide programs similar to those that help victims of abuse. And they must recognize that emotional recovery is a long and difficult process. But if the goal is to intervene at the moment of victimization, the focus should be to work within teenagers cultural frame, encourage empathy and help young people understand when and where drama has serious consequences. Interventions must focus on positive concepts like healthy relationships and digital citizenship rather than starting with the negative framing of bullying. The key is to help young people feel independently strong, confident and capable without first requiring them to see themselves as either an oppressed person or an oppressor.

Danah Boyd is a senior researcher at Microsoft Research and a research assistant professor at New York University. Alice Marwick is a postdoctoral researcher at Microsoft Research and a research affiliate at Harvard University.

Suicide Draws Attention to Gay Bullying

By ANAHAD O'CONNOR | September 21, 2011, 4:23 PM 99
Five months ago, Jamey Rodemeyer, a Buffalo junior high school student, got on his webcam and created a video urging other gay teenagers to remain hopeful in the face of bullying. The 14-year-old spoke of coming out as bisexual and enduring taunts and slurs at school. And he described, in at times desperate tones, rejection and ridicule from other teenagers.

Jamey made the video as part of the It Gets Better project, a campaign that was started last fall to give hope to bullied gay teenagers. All you have to do is hold your head up and youll go far, he said. Just love yourself and youre set. It gets better.

But for Jamey, the struggle apparently was just too much. This week his parents announced that their son was found dead, an apparent suicide. He didnt leave a note, but his parents said he had endured constant taunting, from the same people over and over. They added that his school had intervened to help, and that Jamey appeared to be benefiting from counseling.

News that a bullied teenager had succumbed to the very pressures he urged others to resist came as a shock to supporters of the It Gets Better project. And it provided a sobering reminder that bullied teenagers who appear to be adjusting may still be in trouble.

Dan Savage, the advice columnist and co-founder of It Gets Better, noted on his blog on Tuesday that Jameys death showed that sometimes, the damage done by hate and by haters is simply too great.

It sounds like Jamey had help he was seeing a therapist and a social worker and his family was supportive but it wasnt enough. Whatever help Jamey was getting clearly wasnt enough to counteract the hatred and abuse that he had endured since the fifth grade, according to reports, or Jameys fears of having to face down a whole new set of bullies when he started high school next year. As suicides among lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender teenagers have gotten more attention in the past year, researchers have sought to identify the factors that play the largest role. One study published in the journal Pediatrics in May, which looked at nearly 32,000 teenagers in 34 counties across Oregon, found that gay and bisexual teenagers were significantly more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual

peers. The risk of an attempt was 20 percent greater among gay teenagers who lacked supportive social surroundings, like schools with gaystraight alliance groups or school policies that specifically protected gay, lesbian and bisexual students.

An editorial accompanying the study said the findings pointed to the need for schools to adopt policies that create more supportive and inclusive surroundings.

By encouraging more positive environments, the report stated, such policies could help reduce the risk of suicide attempts not only among LGB students, but also among heterosexual students.

Suicides Put Light on Pressures of Gay Teenagers

By JESSE McKINLEY Published: October 3, 2010
FRESNO, Calif. When Seth Walsh was in the sixth grade, he turned to his mother one day and told her he had something to say.

Seth Walsh

Times Topic: Tyler Clementi

Tyler Clementi

I was folding clothes, and he said, Mom, Im gay, said Wendy Walsh, a hairstylist and single mother of four. I said, O.K., sweetheart, I love you no matter what.

But last month, Seth went into the backyard of his home in the desert town of Tehachapi, Calif., and hanged himself, apparently unable to bear a relentless barrage of taunting, bullying and other abuse at the hands of his peers. After a little more than a week on life support, he died last Tuesday. He was 13. The case of Tyler Clementi, the Rutgers University freshman who jumped off the George Washington Bridge after a sexual encounter with another man was broadcast online, has shocked many. But his death is just one of several suicides in recent weeks by young gay teenagers who had been harassed by classmates, both in person and online. The list includes Billy Lucas, a 15-year-old from Greensburg, Ind., who hanged himself on Sept. 9 after what classmates reportedly called a constant stream of invective against him at school. Less than two weeks later, Asher Brown, a 13-year-old from the Houston suburbs, shot himself after coming out. He, too, had reported being taunted at his middle school, according to The Houston Chronicle. His family has blamed school officials as failing to take action after they complained, something the school district has denied. The deaths have set off an impassioned and sometimes angry response from gay activists and caught the attention of federal officials, including Secretary of Education Arne Duncan, who on Friday called the suicides unnecessary tragedies brought on by the trauma of being bullied. This is a moment where every one of us parents, teachers, students, elected officials and all people of conscience needs to stand up and speak out against intolerance in all its forms, Mr. Duncan said. And while suicide by gay teenagers has long been a troubling trend, experts say the stress can be even worse in rural places, where a lack of gay support services or even openly gay people can cause a sense of isolation to become unbearable. If youre in the small community, the pressure is hard enough, said Eliza Byard, executive director of the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network, which is based in New York. And goodness knows people get enough signals about how wrong it is to be gay without anyone in those communities actually having to say so. According to a recent survey conducted by Ms. Byards group, nearly 9 of 10 gay, lesbian, transgender or bisexual middle and high school students suffered physical or verbal harassment in 2009, ranging from taunts to outright beatings. In Mr. Clementis case, prosecutors in New Jersey have charged two fellow Rutgers freshmen with invasion of privacy and are looking at the death as a possible hate crime. Prosecutors in Cypress, Tex., where Asher Brown died, said Friday that they would investigate what led to his suicide. In a pair of blog postings last week, Dan Savage, a sex columnist based in Seattle, assigns the blame to negligent teachers and school administrators, bullying classmates and hate groups that warp some young minds and torment others. There are accomplices out there, he wrote Saturday.

In an interview, Mr. Savage, who is gay, said he was particularly irate at religious leaders who used antigay rhetoric. The problem is that kids are being exposed to this rhetoric, and then they go to the school and theres this gay kid, he said. And how are they going to treat this gay kid who theyve been told is trying to destroy their family? Theyre going to abuse him. In late September, Mr. Savage began a project on YouTube called It Gets Better, featuring gay adults talking about their experiences with harassment as adolescents. In one video, a gay man named Cyrus tells of his life as a closeted teenager in a small town in upstate New York. The main thing I wanted to come across from this video is how different my life is, how great my life is, and how happy I am in general, he says. Glennda Testone, the executive director of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center in New York City, said their youth programs serve about 50 young people a day, often suffering from bullying, harassment or even violence. The three main groups of pivotal figures are family, friends and their schoolmates, she said. And if theyre feeling isolated and like they cant tell those people, its going to be a very rough ride. Here in Fresno, in Californias conservative Central Valley, groups like Equality Californiahave been more active in trying to establish outreach offices, particularly after an election defeat in 2008, when California voters approved Proposition 8, which banned same-sex marriage. In Tehachapi, in Kern County south of here, more than 500 mourners attended a memorial on Friday for Seth Walsh. One of those, Jamie Elaine Phillips, a classmate and friend, said Seth had long known he was gay and had been teased for years. But this year it got much worse, Jamie said. People would say, You should kill yourself, You should go away, Youre gay, who cares about you? Richard L. Swanson, superintendent of the local school district, said his staff had conducted quarterly assemblies on behavior, taught tolerance in the classroom and had definite discipline procedures that respond to bullying. But these things didnt prevent Seths tragedy, he said in an e-mail. Maybe they couldnt have. For her part, Ms. Walsh said she had complained about Seths being picked on but did not want to cast blame, though she hoped his death would teach people not to discriminate, not be prejudiced. I truly hope, she said, that people understand that. Ian Lovett contributed reporting from Tehachapi, Calif

Bullying is a form of aggressive behavior manifested by the use of force or coercion to affect others, particularly when the behavior is habitual and involves an imbalance of power. It can include verbal harassment, physical assault or coercionand may be directed repeatedly towards particular [2][3] victims, perhaps on grounds ofrace, religion, gender, sexuality, or ability. The "imbalance of power" may be social power and/or physical power. The victim of bullying is sometimes referred to as a "target".

AMERICAN ACADEMY OF CHILD AND ADOLESCENCE PSYCHARITY FACTS 4 FAMILIES Suicides among young people continue to be a serious problem. Each year in the U.S., thousands of teenagers commit suicide. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for 15-to-24-year-olds, and the sixth leading cause of death for 5-to-14-year-olds. Teenagers experience strong feelings of stress, confusion, self-doubt, pressure to succeed, financial uncertainty, and other fears while growing up. For some teenagers,divorce, the formation of a new family with step-parents and step-siblings, or moving to a new community can be very unsettling and can intensify self-doubts. For some teens, suicide may appear to be a solution to their problems and stress. Depression and suicidal feelings are treatable mental disorders. The child or adolescent needs to have his or her illness recognized and diagnosed, and appropriate treatment plans developed. When parents are in doubt whether their child has a serious problem, a psychiatric examination can be very helpful. Many of the signs and symptoms of suicidal feelings are similar to those of depression. Parents should be aware of the following signs of adolescents who may try to kill themselves:

change in eating and sleeping habits withdrawal from friends, family, and regular activities violent actions, rebellious behavior, or running away drug and alcohol use unusual neglect of personal appearance marked personality change persistent boredom, difficulty concentrating, or a decline in the quality of schoolwork frequent complaints about physical symptoms, often related to emotions, such as stomachaches, headaches, fatigue, etc. loss of interest in pleasurable activities not tolerating praise or rewards

A teenager who is planning to commit suicide may also:

complain of being a bad person or feeling rotten inside give verbal hints with statements such as: I won't be a problem for you much longer, Nothing matters, It's no use, and I won't see you again put his or her affairs in order, for example, give away favorite possessions, clean his or her room, throw away important belongings, etc. become suddenly cheerful after a period of depression have signs of psychosis (hallucinations or bizarre thoughts)

If a child or adolescent says, I want to kill myself, or I'm going to commit suicide, always take the statement seriously and immediately seek assistance from a qualified mental health professional. People often feel uncomfortable talking about death. However, asking the child or adolescent whether he or she is depressed or thinking about suicide can be helpful. Rather than putting thoughts in the child's head, such a question will provide assurance that somebody cares and will give the young person the chance to talk about problems. If one or more of these signs occurs, parents need to talk to their child about their concerns and seek professional help from a physician or a qualified mental health professional. With support from family and appropriate treatment, children and teenagers who are suicidal can heal and return to a more healthy path of development.

THE GLEANER

What causes teens to commit suicide?

Published: Monday | September 7, 2009

Dr Donovan Thomas

I HAD been attempting suicide from age 18 to age 28. I had attempted suicide at least 13 times," Dahlia says. "My reasons were many, and
so were my methods. I had a general feeling of being 'damaged goods' due to the fact that I was sexually molested at age eight, age 10 and again at age 12. I had lost my father at age eight (he was murdered) and life just became very hard.

Dahlia's story is taken from the soon-to-be-released second edition of Dr Donovan Thomas' book, Confronting Suicide: Helping Teens at Risk.

She continues: "I woke up feeling lost and desperate. I was overwhelmed. The rent for the last four months had not been paid. I could hardly feed my three children. I thought about what I had lost: my husband, car, businesses, friends, popularity, money, stability and security.

"I walked over to my closet and found what I thought to be a very strong piece of string; something that could bear my body's weight without breaking, and the closet beam looked strong enough for the job. I locked the doors and went into the closet ... ."

Read the book and see how the story of this Jamaican woman panned out.

In the meantime, over the next three weeks, The Gleaner will, in its Positive Parentingfeature, serialise this book. We present, in part, what causes teenagers to be suicidal, and we will provide a list of common causes of suicidal thinking in Jamaican teenagers. These are discussed in detail in the book.

In recent times there has been a significant rise in the number of teenagers committing suicide. Seven contributory factors have been highlighted by Blackburn: 1. Changing moral climate 2. Society's high mobility

3. High divorce rate 4. Frequent alcohol and drug abuse 5. Popularisation and glorification of violence in the mass media 6. Easy availability of guns 7. An already high suicide rate. Victims of teenage suicide very often have experienced one or more of the following: 1. Moving to a new home 2. Changing schools 3. Separation or divorce of parents 4. Death in the family 5. Behavioural problems.

Teenagers who commit suicide are usually reacting to a recent distressing situation. More often than not, the problem relates to conflicts within their families. Some teenagers take their lives because they have not satisfied family/parental expectations. Some do so because they fear pressure from parents and some surrender due to a failure to establish relationships, or the loss of close interpersonal relationships.

Common causes ofsuicidal thinking inJamaican teenagers

Based on discussions with the focus group and teenagers who have attempted suicide, along with a literature survey, the more common causes of suicide attempts and committals among Jamaican teenagers are as follows:

Death and loss

Guilt and hostility

Broken love affair

Molestation at home

Unplanned pregnancy

Social isolation

Manipulation

Impulse

Escape (desire to escape unpleasant situations)

Reunion with deceased loved ones

Physical illness

Expression of love.

Multivariate analysis showed that a history of self-violence, violent thoughts toward others, mental health diagnoses other than depression, and a history of sexual abuse were positively associated with suicide attempt. Sexual abuse, mental health diagnoses other than depression, self-violence, and ease of access to lethal substances/weapons were positively associated with suicide ideation. SUICIDAL IDEATION AND ATTEMPT AMONG ADOLESCENTS IN WESTERN JAMAICA Department of Epidemiology, University of Alabama at Birmingham, Birmingham, AL 35294, USA 31 OF JUNE 2010. METHOD; We conducted a cross-sectional study of 342 adolescents aged 10-19 years from 19 schools

STAR NEWS : MAN IN CUSTADY 4 INFANTS DEATH

Rasbert Turner and Crystal Harrison, Star Writers OCTOBER 11 2011 The St Catherine South police have said the man taken into custody after his infant son died while playing with a gun was still in lock-up up to last night. Dead is Christopher Soutar, five-year-old of Cedar Grove, Portmore, St Catherine. Police reports are on that Friday, Christopher was at home when an explosion was heard and he was found with a gunshot wound. The man is still being interrogated by detectives from the St Catherine Major Investigation Task Force. The police have since seized the licensed firearm of the child's father

5 YR OLD KILLED WITH HIDDEN GUN march 18, 2011

A five-year-old boywas shot dead while he and his seven-year-old cousin were playing with a gun at their home in Hatfield, Manchester, yesterday. The Manchester police have declined to release the name of the boy but said he was pronounced dead at hospital after being rushed there by relatives. The mothers of both children are sisters and live in the same yard, the police said. Reports reaching THE WEEKEND STAR is that sometime during the afternoon, the children were playing when they accidentally hit over a bucket in which the illegal firearm was hidden. playing It is understood that upon seeing the weapon, they took it up and began playing with it and it went off hitting the little boy. Initial police investigations have revealed that after the incident, a man grabbed the gun and fled the scene. He is currently being sought by the police. Both mothers have apparently been hit hard by the incident and one had to be taken to hospital, said the police.e said.